Rebuilding What's Shattered
by sleepy1177
Summary: In the middle of an uprising, Tris is betrayed by the person she thought she could trust the most, and the shattered pieces of her life are put back together by the one person she never imagined trusting. Slightly AU and OOC. Rated M for language and lemons.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's note: This is set 6 months after Tris's iniation. Choosing happens at the age of 18 instead of 16. Eric and Four are 20, Caleb 19 and Tris and her fellow initiates are 18. Four is in leadership in this story, and Tris had been working in the tattoo parlor.** **I don't own these characters, all credit to Veronica Roth.**

Tris POV

I wake up disoriented and cold, surrounded by grey walls. I'm in a bed, for the first time in days. I'm aware of another person laying next to me and I turn expecting to find Tobias but instead I see Christina, sleeping next to me peacefully for the first time that I can remember since our initiation days.

Jeanine Matthews is dead, I remember hearing those words before finally allowing myself to succumb to the exhaustion that has plagued me ever since Dauntless was turned into drones who's task was to eliminate my former faction. I lay in bed, looking at the ceiling, reliving the events of these past several days.

I remember that my friends were turned into mindless soldiers, used by Jeanine in an attempt to overthrow the government. She was aided by some of our own Dauntless leaders, and many Dauntless traitors. How did this go on in our faction; the faction that promised to protect and serve? I watched helplessly as Christina, Will and others killed innocent men, women and children while under the Erudite simulation.

During initiation, my instructor Tobias Eaton, known in Dauntless as Four, discovered my divergence during the fear simulations. With his help, we hid my divergence and I was able to come in first place in my initiation class. Tobias and I also started seeing each other romantically during initiation, and he confessed his love to me right before the Erudite simulation started. Neither of us were affected by the serum used for the simulation because of our divergence, but we played along to avoid discovery. The last time I saw Tobias, he and his estranged father Marcus were leading me to where my parents were hiding out during the attack.

At some point I was captured by Jeanine's minions, and once I was freed I was brought here to Abnegation. The details of my confinement and rescue aren't clear to me, it's almost as if my brain is blocking those days completely. but now that I am awake and somewhat alert I need answers. I slowly slip from under the covers in an effort to not disturb Christina. I make my way downstairs, where I can hear low voices.

Uriah looks up at me and asks "You finally wake up?" I nod and look around. I see my brother Caleb, Peter, Will and Marlene sitting around the dining table. There are a few other people that I don't recognize.

"How'd I get here?" I ask him. "Where's Four?"

Uriah sighs, he looks exhausted and pained. He doesn't answer me, but instead walks over to the table where my brother is sitting, sits down and leans towards Caleb speaking so that only he can hear him. Caleb looks up, turning his attention to me, then taps Peter's shoulder and gestures for him to follow. Both men walk over to me, and my brother is the first to speak.

"Beatrice, what do you remember?" He asks me.

"Why are you asking me questions? I need answers. Where is Four? He was with me before I was captured. Was he captured too? Is he ok? How'd I get here?" I ask angrily.

Caleb sits and gestures for me to do the same. Peter sits next to me and I insinctively move away from him. Caleb runs his hand down his face, leans back and shuts his eyes. I look over at Peter and say "One of you needs to start talking now!"

"Beatrice, I need you to tell me everything that you remember." Caleb says quietly.

I sigh in frustration, but realize that I won't get any answers until I appease him. "Waking up surrounded by my friends being mind controlled. I blended in and pretended to be under the same sim. I found Four on the train, and realized he was also pretending to be under the sim. We looked for Mom and Dad, and we found Marcus who told us that they were hiding in the basement of the church. We were heading to the church but someone must have attacked us and knocked me out, and when I woke up I was in Jeanine's lab." I shake my head, willing myself to remember the rest. "I don't know what happened. Everything is fuzzy, I know someone rescued me, and that person told me Jeanine was killed, and brought me here. I'm trying to remember. Can you please tell me where Four is? He was with me, did they hurt him?"

"Do you remember how you got to Erudite at all? Or what happened in Jeanine's lab? Or anything while you were there?" Caleb asks.

I sit back on the couch and I can feel Peter's stare. I look over at him and his expression is unreadable. "You were there. You were working with her. Why are you here?" I exclaim, I try to get up from the couch and suddenly Peter is there holding my arms down. "You were there too Caleb! You were working with Jeanine!"

"Tris, calm down. We're going to explain everything." Peter says, he's still got his hands on my arms but he's making no move to hurt me. I sit down.

"You both need to explain this now. Stop fucking asking me questions."

"You were knocked out and delivered to Jeanine. I was there, but I was only pretending to work for her, in an effort to save my own ass really since the sim didn't work on me. We got you out of there Tris." Peter replies.

"I also was only pretending to work with Jeanine. It was all part of a larger plan to bring her down." Caleb adds.

"We who? Who brought me to her to begin with?" I ask, my voice raising.

"Beatrice, I need you to calm down, please." Caleb replies gently.

"How'd I get there? What happened to Jeanine?" I ask angrily. The front door opens and I see Eric, Edward and Lynn walk in, along with another man who I don't recognize. "What the fuck is he doing here?" I yell, jumping up and making at attempt to lunge toward Eric. "He's a fucking traitor, why is he here?" Peter and Caleb restrain me.

"I see you're finally awake and I assume no ones filled you in." Eric sneers. "You'd think you'd be a little happier since your life was spared."

"What the fuck? You all better explain everything right now, because from where I'm standing it looks like I'm being held against my will by a bunch of fucking traitors." I spit.

I'm pulled back to the couch. "Sit." Peter says to me. I huff and sit down.

"You were brought to Jeanine by Marcus and Tobias Eaton." Caleb says, looking directly into my eyes.

"No, I'm not listening to this. Why are you lying to me?" I ask, tears threatening to spill.

"Tris, it's true. I was there when they brought you in." Peter replies. "I was tasked with guarding you."

"Beatrice. Tobias Eaton is a faction traitor, working with Jeanine and also the factionless. His mother Evelyn is the leader of the factionless, and she, along with Marcus and Tobias were working with Jeanine to overthrow the government." Caleb says.

"You want me to believe this garbage?" I scream. "Evelyn is dead! We went to her funeral Caleb!" Eric makes his way over to me, kneeling in front of me and forcing me to look at him.

"Tris, it's true. Evelyn is very much alive, and she was working with Jeanine, Marcus and Four." Eric says.

"Why should I believe any of you? Maybe Four stopped her, he probably stopped the simulation too." I reply.

"Four didn't stop anything. I killed Jeanine. I put a bullet right between her eyes. I stopped the simulation, Tris." Eric replies.

"You'd love for me to believe that." I yell.

"Jeanine was running tests on you Tris. You were the number one divergent on her list. She needed you to complete sims and for some sort of testing." Eric replies.

"You were working with her." The tears finally fall. "Four saw you meeting with her. You and Max." I cry harder.

"Tris, I was a mole. Edward was the mole in the factionless. Caleb was the mole in Erudite, and Peter played the willing helper until we could get you out of there." Eric says. Caleb sits next to me and takes me into his arms. I cry into his chest.

"Where's Four?" I cry.

"He's with Evelyn." Caleb replies.

"No, he wouldn't do this."

"Tris, he did. He delivered you to her." Peter says.

"How'd I get here?" I ask.

"We brought you here. Caleb, Eric and me." Peter replies.

"Why?" I sob.

"None of us believed in Jeanine's plans. We came together to stop her, and to save you. She wanted you because she believed you were the strongest divergent. She knew you had tested for three factions." Eric replies.

"You're lying to me. All of you." I scream.

"Someone please go get her friend for fucks sake. The Candor girl." Eric says.

Caleb gets up and walks upstairs to get Christina. I see Peter get up and walk towards Uriah.

"So now you're going to guard me?" I ask Eric.

"No ones holding you here. If you want to go, then go." He motions towards the door while glaring at me. I glare back.

Peter returns with Uriah in tow and my brother brings a sleepy Christina downstairs.

"Uri, Chris, please tell me what's going on." I plead.

"She doesn't believe us." Eric retorts.

"Tris, they're telling you the truth." Uriah says. "They stopped Jeanine."

"And they rescued you and brought you here. Whatever Jeanine gave you made you sleep for days, and have terrible nightmares. We took care of you Tris, we all took turns." Christina replies.

"You trust them?" I ask.

"Yes. They're the reason we're all here and alive." Uri says.

"What about Four?" I ask, tears burning my eyes. "They say he brought me to Jeanine but there's no way he'd do that."

"You didn't show her the footage?" Christina asks Caleb incredulously.

"What footage?" I ask.

Caleb sighs and runs his hands through his hair. "I don't think that's a good idea."

"I agree." Peter replies.

"If you want her to believe you you'd better show it to her. I didn't believe you until I saw it myself." Christina says.

"Someone needs to show me this footage. I want to see it." I yell.

"I will. You have a right to see it." Eric replies, reaching for a tablet. I see Caleb shaking his head.

"I can't watch this again." He says.

Eric moves to sit next to me, he brings up a video on his tablet. "Tris, before I hit play on this you have to be sure you want to see it. It's going to be hard to watch."

"I'm sure."

Christina moves to sit on the other side of me, while Uri and Peter sit across from us. Eric presses the play button. I see a split screen, showing video feed from two different cameras. It's showing Abnegation and the sim, I see soldiers marching past the cameras, and some shooting and killing Abnegation citizens execution style. I turn to look at Eric and he motions for me to keep watching. Soon, I see Tobias, Marcus and me walking into the frame. We are standing next to a building, carefully examining our surroundings. Tobias is leaning close to me and appears to be talking to me. Suddenly, Marcus points at something that grabs my attention, and when I look towards him I see Tobias hit me with the butt of his rifle, knocking me to the ground. I see myself struggling against him, and him straddling me while he beats me with his fists and then starts to strangle me. Marcus pulls him off of me, yelling something to Tobias, and Marcus reaches down to check my pulse. He then injects something into my neck, picks me up and begins walking while carrying me over his shoulder.

I'm full on crying now. Eric stops the video and Christina wraps her arms around me. "Is there more?" I croak. Eric looks at me without his normal glare, and simply nods.

"Are you sure you want to see it?" He asks. I nod.

"Erudite disabled the cameras inside their buildings, but they didn't get some of the ones outside." He says while pulling up another video.

This angle shows the steps to the main Erudite headquarters. I watch as eventually Marcus, Tobias and I come into the frame. Tobias is now carrying my limp body. I watch as they march right up the stairs, and into the glass building. You can see through the glass that I'm being handed over to Dauntless traitors. Eric stops the video.

"I can't believe I trusted him." I cry. Christina continues to hold me. Eric looks at me with sympathy before getting up so Caleb can sit down next to me.

"What happens now?" I ask, moving out of Christina's embrace.

"Marcus is unaccounted for, but Evelyn and Four are confirmed alive and with the rest of the factionless as far as we know. Edward hasn't been discovered as a mole yet, so he plans on rejoining them." Peter replies. "Having him continue as a mole with the factionless is imperative."

"Does Four know that I know about him?" I ask. No one answers. "Why aren't you answering me?" I yell.

Eric looks at me solidly from his kneeling position in front of me. "He thinks you're dead. Jeanine was supposed to kill you once she was finished with what she needed from you. Once he heard that we'd killed Jeanine and rescued you he tasked Edward with killing you, and Edward reported that he had completed that task." He replies.

That one sentence is my undoing. I throw myself forward and break into hard sobs. I'm aware of arms around me, but nothing else. The man who claimed to love me, who protected me, who opened up to me and let me see his biggest fears hand delivered me to a monster then ordered my death. I cry until I have no more tears.

I jerk awake, not realizing I had even fallen asleep. I'm back in the same bedroom I woke up in earlier, and I'm being held by strong arms. Arms with maze tattoos.

"You fell asleep earlier downstairs, I carried you up here. Don't freak out." Eric says from behind me. "We've taken turns with you to help with the nightmares."

"I'm sorry." It's all I can think to say. He moves his arms but makes no move to get up.

"It's fine." He says gruffly.

I sit up and swing my legs over the side of the bed. I bend slightly, holding my head in my hands and putting my elbows on my knees. I feel Eric move on the bed behind me.

"I'll send Christina up." He says. I reach out to stop him. "What?" He asks.

"I have more questions. Do you mind staying?" I ask.

"Are you sure you wouldn't be more comfortable with someone other than me?" He asks, his expression is hard.

"You just held me to ward off nightmares, and it apparently isn't the first time. I am pretty sure you're not going to kill me." I see the briefest smile before his expression returns to its normal hard glare.

"Fine. What do you want to know?" He asks, sitting back down on the bed with his back against the wall.

"Did you know Four was a traitor?"

"I found out the day before the war started." He replies. "I wanted to warn you, but I could never get you alone. You refused to talk to me."

"I had no idea." I reply.

"That's pretty obvious." He replies while rolling his eyes.

"Can you not be an asshole for a few minutes at least?" I ask. He chuckles.

"I didn't know Stiffs cursed."

"I didn't know you could laugh or smile." I retort.

"There's a lot you don't know about me." He replies.

"Apparently so, but I'm not the best judge of character remember? What's going to happen to him?" I ask.

"Jack Kang wants Evelyn and Four captured alive so they can have a trial. He says the public needs to see someone punished for this war. He's not happy that I killed Jeanine, and he's still not fully convinced that I was not working with her."

"Why did you kill her instead of capturing her?" I ask.

"You really don't know do you?" He asks, he almost sounds angry.

"Know what? I've told you what I remember."

"It doesn't matter. I had a chance and I took it. She would have been executed anyway." He replies.

"Why do you do that?" I ask.

"Do what?" He barks.

"Push people away. Get pissed instead of talking. Act like an asshole, look at people like that." I reply meeting his hard glare.

"Why do you care? Look, I need to get downstairs. You can sit up here and mourn number boy breaking your precious little Abnegation heart or you can get out of your damn feelings and actually be helpful. Figure it out." He gets up and quickly leaves the room, I hear his boots stomping down the stairs.

I scream in frustration into my pillow. Then I decide to go downstairs and join the others.

"Hey Bea, feeling better?" Caleb asks.

"Yeah. Where is Christina?" I ask.

"She went with Will to do some surveillance." He replies.

"Ok, what's the plan?" Eric asks, looking at Peter.

"Edward has rejoined the factionless, he plans on reconvening with us tomorrow. Uriah, Lynn, Marlene, Will and Christina are out doing surveillance. And we're still dead." He replies.

"Dead?" I ask.

"Yeah, Evelyn thinks we're all dead." Caleb replies, offering no further explanation.

"Where are mom and dad?" I ask him.

"Probably Amity. Most of the Abnegation survivors are there. Along with some Dauntless I believe." he replies.

"I want to go there." I reply.

"No." Peter replies.

"I didn't ask for permission."

"You don't need to, you're not going. If anyone loyal to Jeanine or Evelyn sees you they will turn you in. You will not leave here." Caleb says.

"It's not safe here either. We have a handful of people staying in a house. If they find any of us they'll kill us. You all must know that. We need to go to Amity, we need to find the loyal Dauntless and we need to make a plan. Sitting here hiding isn't going to get anything done." I yell.

"She's right." Eric says. "We need the numbers. Amity may or may not support us, but we have to try."

"There's no way I'm letting her out in the open like that." Caleb says.

"I'll go with her. We can leave tonight. You two can wait for our scouts here and then make your move to Amity tomorrow night." Eric replies.

"She's my sister, I'll go." Caleb says.

Eric scoffs. "What are you going to protect her with? Your brain? You're Erudite enough to realize that an untrained soldier is not what she needs."

"I could go." Peter says.

"You tried to throw her into the chasm. No way in hell you're going to be alone with her." Eric says.

"You had someone throw knives at her, someone we now know wants her dead." Peter replies angrily.

"What?!" Caleb yells.

"All of you, shut the fuck up!" I yell. Everyone quiets and looks at me. "Peter, you stay and protect my brother until the others get here. Eric, you and I leave tonight. Done."

"You trust him more than me?" Peter asks.

"What do any of us even know about trust? It's not like any of us even liked each other a few days ago. We're here because we're forced to be." I reply coldly.

"That's a great way to treat people who risked their lives to save yours." Eric scoffs.

"Well if it was such a bother you should have just left me there to die." I retort.

"You are such a fucking child." Eric replies.

"Yeah, that whole two years you have on me makes you the authority on adulthood."

"That's enough, both of you." Peter says. "What the fuck? You know there's an issue when _I_ have to be the voice of reason. We may not have liked each other a few days ago, but we're what we have left now. It'd be a good idea to find a way to get along and work together."

Eric and I continue to glare at each other, but we don't speak.

"You two should sleep. We'll wake you when it's time to leave." Caleb says, motioning to Eric and me.

I nod and turn towards the stairs. I hear Eric following behind me. I go back into the same room I slept in earlier and he stops in the doorway.

"Do you want me to stay in here with you? The nightmares and all."

"No. Go away." I reply with my back to him.

"I'll go to the other room." He says. I walk towards the bed to sit down and I can feel the tears I've been trying to hold back slipping down my cheeks.

"Are you ok?" I jump at Eric's voice. He's still standing in the doorway.

"Does it look like it?"

He sighs and doesn't move from the doorway.

"I don't need you to stand there and watch me cry, although I'm sure you enjoy it immensely."

"Whatever. I liked you a lot better when you were drugged." He mutters and walks away.

I cry harder, but finally lay down in the bed, pulling the covers around me. I feel the bed dip and someone crawl into the bed behind me. I turn around expecting to see Christina, but I'm surprised to see its Eric.

"Why are you here?" I sniffle.

"You need me to be." He replies, wrapping his arms around me and pulling me close.

"You hate me." I reply.

"You hate me." He replies.

"Why did you kill Jeanine?" I ask.

"Does that really need to be answered? She's dead now." He replies.

"I can tell it was personal." I try to look up at him, but his arms are too tight around me. I can hear his heartbeat racing in his chest.

"I don't want to talk about it Stiff." He replies coldly.

"I'm here to listen whenever you're ready."

"Why do you even care? You hate me."

"I don't hate you, Eric." I reply quietly. "Do you really hate me?"

"Does it look like it?" He asks. "Go to sleep. We have a long night ahead of us."

I close my eyes, and listen to Eric's heart beating until I doze off.


	2. Chapter 2

**Just a reminder, I don't own these characters, they belong to Veronica Roth.**

Eric POV

"Time to wake up." Someone says to me while shaking my shoulder. I blink my eyes a few times and see Peter. "It's time for you two to leave. Should I even ask?" He gestures to where Tris is still sleeping with her arms wrapped around me tightly and her head nestled under my chin.

"No." I reply gruffly. "Get out." He chuckles and walks out of the bedroom.

"Tris, wake up. We have to go." I rub her back in an attempt to wake her. She stirs slightly then jerks awake.

"Sorry, I just forgot where I was for a minute." She says sleepily.

"No offense taken. Let's go."

We head downstairs and find Caleb, Peter, Christina and Will. Caleb approaches first.

"Be careful. Take care of each other." He grabs Tris and they share a long hug. He then extends his hand and I shake it. "I'm trusting you with her life. Don't let me down." He says, low enough so that its just me that hears it. I nod.

Christina throws her arms around Tris "We will see you tomorrow. Please be careful."

"We will. We'll see you all tomorrow. Be safe." Tris replies.

Caleb hands us guns and a sack full of ammo. "There's some water and food in there too." We both thank him.

We head out in the frigid night air to make our way to the train. "We'll take the train as far as we can, unless it's not safe." I say and Tris nods. The train quickly approaches, we run alongside it and I jump in first. The car is empty, so I turn around and extend my hand to Tris, pulling her in quickly.

"We have awhile if you want to rest." I say to her. We sit next to each other against the back wall, facing the door.

"I'm fine. I slept pretty well earlier." She replies quietly. I look over and see her shivering. I take my coat off and throw it over her. "Thank you." She says.

We sit in silence for awhile. I notice that Tris scoots away from me, but she pats my leg and gestures for me to move it. She then sits between my legs, scooting back until her back is flush with my chest, then throws my coat across both of us like a blanket.

"Your teeth were chattering." She says.

"Thanks." I reply. I instinctively wrap my arms around her, "Sorry." I say, before moving my arms. She doesn't reply, she just grabs both of my hands and pulls my arms back around her waist tighter. She leans her head back on my shoulder.

"Body heat." She says and I nod.

After a few minutes, I can feel Tris start to relax against me. Her even breathing makes me think she's sleeping. I glance down and I see that I'm right. I hold her a little tighter, and move her slightly so her drooping head is now in the crook of my neck. Her warm breath is soothing.

We are quickly approaching where we need to jump for Amity, so I gently shake Tris awake. She snuggles into my neck for a moment, and I feel her brush her lips against my skin. She probably thinks I'm Four.

"Tris, wake up." I say, shaking her again. She moves and looks up at me, blinking several times.

"I'm awake. I didn't even realize I fell asleep. I'm sorry." She replies. She begins to move and she stumbles against me. "Oh, shit, sorry."

"Stop apologizing to me." I say, gruffly. "Get up, we have to jump soon."

We both stand up and Tris attempts to hand me my coat. I shake my head. "Put it on, you need it more than me right now." She nods slightly.

"Am I allowed to say thank you?" She asks with a hint of anger.

"You just did. Jump." I reply and Tris takes a running start before jumping out of the train. I do the same right after her. We can see the Amity compound ahead and we begin walking in that direction. We reach the Dauntless guards at the gate, who I quickly recognize as Samuel and Jason, two initiates from my training class. They eye me wearily.

"Why are you here?" Samuel asks. "You are pretty stupid coming here without backup. Your kind aren't welcome here."

"He's with me. He's on our side, he saved my life." Tris replies. "He killed Jeanine."

Both guards eyes widen at Tris's explanation. "How do we know you're telling the truth? He could be forcing you to say that." Samuel asks.

"You don't. We've come here seeking refuge. If he was working with Erudite, why wouldn't we go there? There are two of us and many of you. Be realistic." She replies.

"She's telling the truth. I'm not holding anyone against their will. It's fucking cold, can we find somewhere indoors to discuss this at least?" I reply angrily.

"You're lucky she's with you because your attitude still fucking sucks." Samuel replies.

"Will you please let us in? We're not here to cause any harm." Tris says.

"We will have to take you straight to Johanna." Jason says.

"That's fine." Tris replies.

We are escorted to Johanna's office, where I introduce her to Tris. She greets both of us with a smile, pausing to hug Tris.

"Welcome. How can I help you?" She asks, gesturing for us to have a seat in front of her desk.

"We're here to find the loyal Dauntless, and also the Abnegation refugees." Tris responds.

"I see. I thought you were loyal to Jeanine's cause." Johanna addresses me directly. "Although, I have heard rumors stating otherwise. I don't like rumors though, I like facts."

"No, I was not loyal to Jeanine. I was a mole, working with some Dauntless loyal, along with members of other factions in order to stop Jeanine." I reply.

Johanna nods. "So are the other rumors true, the ones saying you killed Jeanine and Max?"

Tris draws in a sharp intake of air next to me. "You killed Max?" She asks.

"Yes, I had to kill him, and yes I also killed Jeanine." I reply, hoping this is enough answer for now. Tris seems to read my mind and simply nods in response.

"I understand the factionless are working with the loyal Erudite and Dauntless traitors to overthrow the faction system." Johanna replies.

"You are correct. They are being led by Evelyn Johnson Eaton, Marcus Eaton and Tobias Eaton, who you may also know as Four." I reply. Johanna nods.

"I had heard he was a traitor, although I didn't want to believe it. I'm sorry to hear it." She replies.

"As are we." I reply.

"The Abnegation refugees are here, along with some Dauntless. We've had faction representatives keeping records of all of the survivors. Most of the Dauntless seem to be staying in Candor, according to the information we've gathered thus far." Johanna replies. "Is there someone in particular you're looking for?"

I rub my hand through my hair and down my face. "I wonder if any of the Dauntless leaders survived. Max and Four were both traitors, and I haven't seen Harrison or Karl since everything started."

Johanna types on her tablet, her eyebrows furrowed. "Max, Karl and Harrison are listed as deceased, Four and you are marked as traitors. Eric, as much as I'd like to change that status for you, I can't. You're going to have to go to Candor to clear your name. From what I understand, Harrison was also working with Jeanine. As of right now, Dauntless has no leadership."

"We will need to go to Candor soon. I need to get Dauntless back together, as much as we are able to." I reply, then look at Tris "Of course we will find your parents first." Tris nods.

"Johanna, I'm also looking for Natalie and Andrew Prior. Are they here?" Tris asks.

Johanna types on her tablet again and her expression changes. She comes around from the back of her desk and perches on the front corner of her desk closest to Tris.

"The Prior's are your parents?" She asks, but she already knows the answer.

"Yes, are they here?" Tris asks.

"Tris, I'm very sorry to have to tell you this. Your parents were killed during the attack on Abnegation." Johanna quietly says.

"No, that can't be right. I was told they were hiding in the church basement. There's been a mistake in your records." Tris replies frantically.

"Tris, the church was infiltrated during the attack. There were no survivors. Your parents bodies were reported as recovered. I'm very sorry." Johanna reaches for Tris' hand, but Tris immediately jumps up from her chair, sobbing and pacing. I go to her, unsure of what to do to comfort her. When she's facing me I pull her into my arms and let her cry.

"Johanna, would it be ok if Tris and I were to stay here tonight?" I ask.

"We don't typically turn any of the war refugees away, however because of your traitor status we will have to vote. Under the circumstances," she gestures at Tris, "I will put that off until tomorrow morning and I will have a room prepared for you. Take the time you need, I'll come back when it's ready." She walks out of the office.

I just hold Tris as tight as I can, rubbing my hands along her back. I'm not sure of how to comfort someone, but this feels like the right thing to do. I can feel Tris swaying a bit, so I slide down the wall into a sitting position, pulling Tris down onto my lap. She continues to sob and clutch onto me. Soon, her cries start to subside into whimpers and hiccups.

"Do you think that Marcus and Tobias killed my parents?" She asks.

"I don't know." I reply honestly.

Johanna returns. "We've prepared a room for you, please follow me."

Tris and I get up and she immediately takes my hand. We follow Johanna to a room.

"There's clothes and toiletries left here for you both. We had to guess your sizes, but we can find you more tomorrow. I'm sorry we didn't have a bigger room, will this suffice for tonight at least?"

"Yes, thank you." Tris quietly answers. Johanna pulls her into another hug, which Tris reciprocates.

"Johanna, the rest of our group plans on moving tomorrow evening from Abnegation. Will they be able to stay here?" I ask.

"Of course. We can prepare space in the dormitory, it'll take some time but we can manage. Please let me know if you need anything at all." She says, before slipping out the door.

"I think I want to shower." Tris says.

"Let's find you some clean clothes." I reply, rummaging through the clothes Johanna left. I find a red long sleeved tshirt and the smallest pair of sweatpants in the pile. "Will this work?" I ask. Tris nods, then finds some clean undergarmets and heads to the bathroom.

I'm lost in my own thoughts and must have dozed off because I jerk awake when I hear the bathroom door open. Tris steps out wearing the red tshirt and holding the pants. "They're too big." She says quietly.

"I'm going to take a quick shower now." I say, grabbing some clothes and disappearing into the bathroom. I'm surprised to see how well stocked the shower is. I stand beneath the hot water, just letting it wash over me. It's been days since I've had a proper shower, and this feels great. I get washed up, step out to dry off and dress in some clean boxers and a pair of yellow basketball shorts.

When I step out of the bathroom I see Tris sitting on the couch with her legs up close to her body and her arms wrapped around her knees. She looks lost in thought. I sit down next to her.

"Want to talk about it?" I ask.

"Why did you have to kill Max?" She asks. I'm caught off guard by her question.

"You heard me when I answered Johanna." I reply.

"I did, but I want to know the whole story. You said you had to do it." She replies.

"What more is there?" I reply, moving to stand up. She reaches for my hand and pulls me back towards her.

"Stop that. You can't just get pissed when you don't want to talk about something. You do that all the time and it needs to stop."

"What do you even know about me Tris? You've spent your entire time in Dauntless hating me, listening to that fucking number idiot. Like you said earlier like you are a terrible judge of character." I reply. She won't let go of my hand.

"You're right. I did judge you, and I'm sorry. How can I get to know the real you when you constantly push me away?" She responds calmly. "Your first reaction is to attack. You don't need to have your defenses up constantly Eric. You saved me, and you saved so many others when you stopped Jeanine. I was wrong about you."

Her response isn't what I expected. "Fine. What do you want to know?"

"Will you please tell me about Max?" She asks.

"I decided early on that I wanted nothing to do with Jeanine and her ridiculous genocide plans. I wanted Max to see her for what she was, he was like a father to me and I just wanted him to do the right things. He didn't, he was fooled by Jeanine and her promises for power and importance in her new government. I was able to keep appearances up until they brought you in. Max didn't see me kill Jeanine, but he caught us trying to rescue you. He pulled a gun on you to finish the job. So, I had a decision to make, him or you." I reply.

"You chose me. I'm surprised." She replies. "I know Max was important to you."

"He didn't leave me a choice."

"I wish he could have met your expectations. I know you cared deeply for him." She says.

"Yeah, well he didn't."

"You saved me more than once. Thank you." She says quietly. "But why? I'm just one person, and you risked a lot."

It's a fair question. There's something that is drawing me to Tris, it's almost as if we have this unspoken connection but every time I try to think about the friendship, or whatever it is that we had I draw huge blanks. From what little I can piece together, we've never exactly been friends. I know many of the tattoos I have are from her, but that seems to have been the extent of our interactions because of her super possessive ex boyfriend. I've always paid close attention to her since I knew how much Jeanine wanted her. She's always intrigued me, after all it was hard not to notice the Stiff who made it to first place in training, but it was also frustrating to watch her follow Four like a lost puppy. She needed her own strength and she depended on him instead. Even though I can't put my finger on it right now I know there was _something_ between Tris and me.

"No one deserves to be treated the way you have been." I reply, carefully choosing my words.

We sit in silence, until I hear her crying softly. "I can't believe my parents died. In just a few days time I lost my parents and the man who claimed to love me. All I have left is Caleb." She's crying much harder now. I realize I need to open up a bit to her.

"You asked me about Jeanine. You said it was personal, well you were right." I say, she meets my eyes and nods her head. "When I took my aptitude test, my results were an even split between Dauntless and Erudite."

"You're divergent." She whispers.

"Yes. Jeanine knew, and she saw it as an opportunity. Dauntless had been very hesitant to partner with Erudite for years, so she decided instead of using me as one of her Guinea pigs for testing she could use me within Dauntless. She pushed me to choose Dauntless, she had me trained before I even left Erudite and she expected me to come in first and go into leadership. My first strike in her eyes was when I finished second in rankings to Four. He turned down leadership the first several times he was offered it, so they finally offered it to me. Her assignment for me was for me to hunt divergents, bringing her the ones she deemed fit and killing the others. Apparently that was my second strike because I couldn't bring myself to turn any in, nor could I kill anyone. So even though I seemed to appease her enough with my false reports, she knew better. My third strike was when I didn't bring you to her myself, and she had to convince Marcus and Four to have you delivered to her instead of them bringing you to Evelyn. Her punishment for my third strike was to have my family killed. The day we rescued you was the day I found out about my family's murder."

"Oh my God." Tris says, looking at me with tears in her eyes. She scoots closer to me, and reaches for my face. I feel her wiping tears from my cheeks that I had no idea I shed. She puts her arms around me and pulls me close. I wrap my arms around her and hold onto her like she'll disappear. I'd only recently found out about my family's murder, and I haven't had time to process it or grieve. Tris is clutching on to me, rubbing one hand down my back and the other thru my hair. It's then that I finally let it out. I cry into Tris' shoulder, feeling the sobs wracking my body and causing me to shake uncontrollably.

"It's my fault. My family, your parents, it's all because I didn't follow her instructions."

"No. You did everything right Eric. You did everything you could to stop her, and you saved countless lives. She would have done this with or without you. You saw that yourself with Max's alliance. She has Marcus, Evelyn and Four too. You are one person, Eric. You have to stop trying to carry the entire weight of the world on your shoulders. You cannot blame yourself." She says to me, putting her hands on my face and making me look at her.

We stare at each other for what feels like an eternity, two broken people trying to find something whole. She leans towards me and I meet her half way, crashing my lips into hers. She parts her lips slightly and I let my tongue slip in to her eager mouth. Our tongues dance, and fight for dominance. My hands wander into her hair and she moves so she's straddling me. I pull her hair back so her neck is exposed, and I suck on her pulse point until she moans lightly. I pull her mouth back to mine and we kiss each other passionately, like we've waited our whole lives for it. I pull away from the kiss.

"Tris, what are we doing?" I ask.

"I don't want us to be sad anymore Eric. We've lost everything. Our families, our homes, we've been betrayed. We have each other though."

"I don't want to do something you're going to regret." I reply.

She pulls her tshirt over her head, leaving her in just her underwear. She moves my hands onto her breasts and I skim my thumbs across her hard nipples. She kisses my jawline and then my neck and back to my mouth. I kiss down her neck and to her breasts and take one of her nipples into my mouth, running my tongue across it and sucking it lightly while massaging her other breast. She moans and grinds into my erection. She runs her hands down my bare chest and reaches into the waistband of my shorts. She wraps her small hand around my cock and I moan loudly, biting her breast. She starts to slowly stroke me, while kissing me hungrily. I pull back and put my hand on her arm.

"Tris, I'm not Four."

"I don't want you to be him." She replies, kissing me again.

"If we don't stop soon I may not be able to." I reply.

"Good." She replies.

"We have no protection." I reply.

"I'm clean and on the shot. Are you clean?" She asks.

"Yeah, clean, always wore condoms with other partners." I reply.

"Take me, please Eric." She moans.

She stands up and removes her underwear, leaving her completely naked. She reaches for my waistband again and begins tugging my shorts and boxers off. I lift my hips up so she can remove them completely. She kneels down and licks my cock from base to tip, swirling her tongue around its head. She then takes me into her mouth.

"Fuck, that feels so good Tris." I put my hands onto her head and guide her up and down. She's sucking and dragging her teeth lightly up and down my shaft. My cock touches the back of her throat a few times, she relaxes her throat and takes me fully into her warm mouth. It's been entirely too long since I've been intimate with anyone and I know I'm not going to last. "I'm going to cum." I breathe. She continues to suck me until I spill into her mouth. She licks it all and swallows.

I pick her up and carry her to the bed, laying her down gently. I pull her to the edge, and spread her legs apart. I kiss her inner thighs, then run my tongue down her wet folds. I plunge my tongue into her, then move up and run my tongue around her sensitive bundle. "Eric...yes...that feels so good..." I gently suck on her clit, then slowly push my middle finger into her.

"You are so wet, you taste so fucking good Tris." She grinds into me, and I respond by entering another finger. I pump my fingers into her while licking, sucking and biting her clit. Her breathing gets ragged and heavy.

"I'm cumming, Eric!" She moans my name loudly, and I lap up her juices while she rides out her orgasm. She pulls my hair and guides me to her mouth. She's kissing me hard, her hands wander down and start to stroke me again.

"Tris, I want you so much." I moan against her neck while kissing it.

"Take me." She breathes against me.

"I don't want you to regret this." I look her in the eyes.

"I won't. I want you as much as you want me. Please." She replies.

I push into her slowly, giving her time to adjust. The feeling of being skin to skin with someone for the first time is overwhelming and I'm finding it difficult to stay still. She starts moving her hips against me and I start pumping into her, letting her meet my pace. I lean down and kiss her hard, slipping my tongue into her mouth and mating her tongue with mine.

"Harder." She whispers. I start pounding into her harder, her moans are louder. I pull out of her completely and flip her to her stomach. I pull her hips up so she's on her knees and thrust into her quickly.

"Fuck you're tight." I moan. I start pounding into her hard and fast. I can already feel her walls tightening around my cock.

"You feel so good. You're gonna make me cum." She moans loudly. I feel her walls throbbing around me, she's even wetter now. I keep thrusting into her, but I feel myself falling over the edge.

"Tris..." I yell while spilling deep inside of her, barely able to catch my breath. She moves slightly to lay down, so I pull out of her. I lay on my back and pull her to my chest, wrapping one arm around her.

"That was incredible." She whispers.

"It really was." I reply. She soon falls asleep. I am left with my own thoughts. What the hell was I thinking?


	3. Chapter 3

Tris POV

 _I'm outside in Abnegation standing near my childhood home. I see Four approach me with a blank look in his eyes. He roughly grabs my hand and drags me into my former home. My parents see us and welcome us inside. My mother comes towards me to give me a hug but Four quickly shoots her in her stomach and she crumples to the floor. I scream in terror and swing my fists at him, but they just pass through him like he's not even standing there. My father calmly walks over to greet me and Four shoots him in the head. I look down at my hands and I'm covered in blood and now I'm holding the gun._

 _"It's all your fault, Tris. You killed them. You are the reason everyone dies. You should kill yourself now." Four says to me as he walks closer to me._

 _I point the gun at him. "Stay away from me!" I shout._

 _"You're not going to kill me. We have too much history." He sneers._

 _"Get away from me Four!" I'm crying hysterically. My hands are shaking._

 _"You're a coward Tris. You're a whore. You think I don't know you're fucking Eric? He's just using you like the slut you are. You are so stupid. You believed it when I said I love you. Such a naive child. No one loves you Tris." He takes another step towards me and reaches slowly for the gun. I quickly move my hand, put the gun to my head and pull the trigger._

I wake up with a start, shaking and sweating. I feel the weight of another body next to me, and an arm wrapped around my waist. I look over and see Eric sleeping, his face relaxed. I slip out from under his arm and out of the bed. I find some clothes to put on and quietly leave the room.

There's really no one awake at this hour, and Amity is quiet and very peaceful. I look up at the night sky and it's perfectly clear, a sky full of stars. It's almost serene enough to forget everything that's happened over the past several days.

My parents are gone. It doesn't seem possible. I feel like if I shut the thought of that out long enough it'll be like it was before: faction before blood with the hope of seeing them next visiting day. I hate the thought of them suffering at all. Were they scared? Is it possible that Marcus or Tobias actually murdered my parents?

Tobias. He's a traitor. Did I ever really love him? I never said those words to him, even after he confessed his supposed love to me. Looking back, he seemed so sincere in his feelings for me, but I now know it was an intriquite plan on his part. I trusted him implicitly, I gave myself to him physically but something always held me back emotionally with him. Why is he working with Marcus? He took me into his fear landscape, so I know his history with Marcus and his fear of him is genuine. He never told me about his mother being alive. There was so much about him I didn't know.

Thinking about Tobias leads me to think about what happened with Eric last night. In the heat of the moment, I didn't regret what was happening. We both needed a distraction from our losses. Can I truly trust him though? Am I making the same mistakes with him that I did with Tobias? Am I blinded by physical want and need and blocking out the emotional issues? Maybe it should be just a one time thing. We needed something to get our minds off of reality.

"Tris, are you alright?" I'm pulled out of my thoughts by Johanna sitting down next to me. "I'm sorry if I startled you, I was out for a walk and saw you sitting over here alone so I was concerned."

"I couldn't sleep. Do you know what time it is?" I ask.

"A little after 2:00am. I too suffer from occasional insomnia. Is there anything you need? Can I help in any way?" She asks with a voice laced with concern.

"I don't know." I sigh.

"You're dealing with so much at such a young age. I'm know your parents loved you very much Tris, and they were proud. Andrew spoke so highly of you each time I saw him." She says.

I feel my tears slipping down my cheeks. "I thought he was upset with me for my choices. He seemed so upset when I chose Dauntless, and I know my mother said he was very vocal in his disapproval of Four."

"Tris, a parent will always worry about their children's choices no matter how old they are. You father loved you unconditionally. His disapproval of Four may not have made much sense to you at the time, but your father was an exceptional judge of character and his perception has proven to be right." She replies.

"Yes, it has." I sigh. "Johanna, did my father like Eric?"

Johanna smiles. "Eric can be an extremely difficult person to like. He's so young, and he's been put into a very important role being in leadership, so he formed this impenetrable outer shell in an effort for people to respect him. He's brilliant, and fair, and even though he's arrogant and cocky everyone views him as a valuable leader. Your father and I never spoke personally of Eric, but I could tell with their interactions that he liked him very much. Tris, there is more to Eric than the mask he wears. Deep in my heart I never believed he was working for Jeanine, my only fear was that she was forcing his hand in some way to ensure his cooperation. After hearing about the tragic murder of his family, I now believe she thought she could force him into cooperating with her."

"It's so hard for me to trust him. I feel like I don't know him at all. Four's hatred of him kept me guarded away from Eric. I treated him very unfairly." I reply.

"It's very disappointing to see the path that Tobias Eaton has chosen. I believe your father's disapproval of Tobias was warranted Tris. Tobias is observant, and quiet, but you could look at him and see he was constantly calculating. He's exactly like his father in that way. There aren't many people who believe the rumors about Marcus Eaton, but I always did. Eric is a good person who wears a mask of intimidation. Tobias was great at playing a part: he's friendly, handsome and well spoken. He wasn't your typical Dauntless leader, and that helped him gain acceptance from the other factions. However, when he thought that no one was watching him his true character would come out. You are a lot like your father, Tris. You are an excellent judge of character, you just have to believe in yourself."

"Johanna, thank you. Talking to you has really helped, you have no idea how much it means. I missed my mom dearly when I transferred to Dauntless, but I knew she was there and that I would see her at least once a year on visiting day. The ache I'm feeling now is so much deeper because I know I'll never be able to talk to her like this again. So thank you for being so kind to me." I say, tears falling.

Johanna scoots closer to me and gives me a hug. "No one will ever take the place of your mother my dear, but know I'm always willing to talk and listen. You are a special girl Tris, don't forget that."

We sit together quietly while Johanna allows me to cry on her shoulder. We hear a crackle and look to see who or what is approaching us.

"I'm sorry if I'm interrupting, I was concerned when I woke up and you were gone." Eric says. I pat the ground next to me, gesturing for him to sit.

"No need for apologies Eric, I was actually just leaving. I bid you both a good night, or a good morning depending on how you look at it. I'll see you both soon." Johanna stands and walks away.

"How much of that did you hear?" I ask.

"Not a lot. Once I realized the two of you were talking I moved back to give you privacy. You ok?" Eric asks.

"I had a nightmare." I reply.

"Want to talk about it?" He asks.

"Not really." I reply.

"Do you want me to leave you alone?" He asks.

"No. Please stay." He takes off his jacket and places it over my shoulders. "Thank you." He nods.

We sit next to each other, not touching or talking. Eric lays back and looks up at the sky.

"You can see everything up there." He says. I lie down next to him and he pulls me closer so my head is on his chest.

"It's beautiful." I agree. "Eric, tell me more about you."

I can feel him tense slightly below me. "What do you want to know?"

"Everything. Anything." I reply. He sighs.

"I don't really talk about myself. I don't know what to say." He replies.

"What was your family like?" I ask timidly. He's quiet, I can barely hear him breathing.

"My parents were good people. They were a little strict on my brother and me growing up, but that's typical Erudite. My father was a successful surgeon, my mother a pediatrician. It was expected that my brother Michael and I would follow in their footsteps and go into the medical field as well. As much as I embrace knowledge, I always knew I would leave Erudite, even if Jeanine hadn't forced my hand. There was just too much more out there for me. Michael stayed, his choosing ceremony was the year before mine. He was going to be a great doctor." He starts choking up. I rub my hand up and down his chest and he takes my hand in his. "I think I was a disappointment to them."

"Why would you possibly think that? You're a leader, the youngest one in Dauntless history. People respect you Eric. Your parents had to be proud of your accomplishments." I reply. "Did they ever come on visiting day?"

"Every year since I left. Michael too." He replies.

"They loved you. If you were a disappointment they wouldn't have come." I reply.

"I saw your mother on visiting day, you could tell how proud she was of you Tris."

"My father didn't come. I remember the look on his face at the choosing ceremony when I chose Dauntless. He was disappointed in me." I say.

"He was proud of you Tris. We talked about you each time we saw each other at the leadership meetings. He was extremely happy to hear you were doing so well." He replies.

"You told him I was doing well? That's surprising."

"It was the truth, I wouldn't have allowed my hatred of Four cloud my judgment of you." He replied.

"I miss them." I cry.

"I know. I miss mine too." He pulls me closer.

"My father liked you."

"How would you know that?" Eric asks.

"Johanna and I were talking. I mentioned how my father was displeased about my relationship with Four. I asked her if she thought my father liked you and she said that she could tell he liked you very much."

"I think I'm more tolerable than likable. Johanna is being too kind." He replies.

"Johanna likes you too. She can see through your mask."

"My mask? Is that what she called it?" He scoffs.

"I'm starting to see through it too."

Eric moves away from me and quickly sits up. "You should stop acting like you know me. You only know what you've been told."

"I also know what I see. You're kinder than you give youself credit for." I reach for his hand but he pulls it away.

"You think just because we had sex that you're some sort of expert on me?"

His words sting like a slap in the face. This is Eric's defense mechanism, it's the way he pushes anyone away who dares to get close to him.

"No, it has nothing to do with sex Eric. It has everything to do with letting your walls down. Why do you have to push me away?"

"Earlier was a mistake." He says without looking at me.

"What are you talking about?" I ask tentatively.

"We shouldn't have had sex. Now you're expecting more. I should have known better." He replies.

"You regret it?" I ask, feeling the tears forming. I refuse to let them fall.

"It was a distraction."

"You were concerned with _me_ regretting it earlier, you seemed to want it. What version of events should I believe? The words that come out of your mouth or your actions?" I ask.

He says nothing. I dare to look over at him and he's looking up at the sky. His jaw is tense.

"Everyone makes mistakes." He says.

"My only mistake was believing in you." I reply, before getting up and walking away.

I will myself not to cry as I walk back to the room. I don't know what I was expecting from Eric, but it certainly wasn't the whiplash type emotions that he was putting me through. I hear footsteps quickly approaching and then Eric's voice.

"Tris, wait." He says. "I'm an asshole."

"You think?" I ask incredulously as I turn away from him to continue walking. "It's cold. If you want to continue this conversation we can do so inside. If not, I'm going to bed." He falls into step next to me and we silently walk back to our room together.

Once inside, I hang my borrowed jacket over a chair and crawl onto the bed, sitting Indian style against the headboard. Eric sits on a chair facing the bed. I make eye contact and wait for him to break the silence.

"I don't know how to do feelings, ok? I'm not good at this shit." He says.

"I didn't ask you to put a label on this" I gesture between us. "Or to define your feelings. The only thing I've asked of you is to stop the bullshit of you getting pissed off and pushing me away. You tell me I know nothing about you, how do you expect me to when you've spent the past year treating me like I'm nothing more than an annoying child who you're tasked with watching?"

"You've spent that time being poisoned by _Four,_ who I'm sure blamed me for every fucking thing that happened inside and outside our faction. He gave you his sad backstory and suddenly it was ok for him to be an asshole just because he had an excuse, right? Tell me, Tris, when did you once try to get to know me while you were with _him?"_

He's absolutely right, and it's maddening. I have spent my entire time in Dauntless listening and believing every word Tobias ever said.

"You're right." I reply.

"Really? How'd those words taste coming out of your mouth?" He sneers.

"Eric, enough. This asshole persona isn't going to work, not if you want to finish this conversation. You deserve better than the lack of effort I've put forth, ok? If you want me to know the real you then you have to be prepared to show me who you really are."

"What if you're wrong about me? What if this mask as you call it is who I really am?" He asks.

"I'm not wrong about you. You chose to do the right thing when you chose to take Jeanine down."

"After she gave me no other option."

"You made your choice before then Eric. You protected the divergents. You couldn't have predicted she would have gone as far as she did with your family."

He looks deep in thought, like he's considering what I just said. The glare and scowl that has become almost part of his permanent facial structure are erased and he looks more like the 20 year old he is instead of the hardened leader he was forced to become.

"I don't know if I can live up to your expectations of me." He says finally.

"What do you think my expectations are?"

He shrugs. "I'm not very kind or gentle. I'm emotionally stunted, and closed off. I don't know how to let people in because no ones ever cared enough to try. I'm standoffish, and moody, and there are times where I don't want to talk even if I should be talking. I'm a soldier first and foremost. I've never been more than that for anyone else. No one has wanted me to." He replies.

"We are Dauntless, and we're in the middle of a potential uprising, I expect you to be a soldier first, and I expect to be fighting by your side. I don't care about who you _think_ you are, I care about who you are and who you want to be."

"What do you want me to be Tris?"

"True to yourself, and open to the idea that someone might care about you. What do you want me to be Eric?"

"Exactly who you are right now." He replies. The moonlight that's shining in through our window is making his eyes appear to be silver. The anger, stress and frustration that is usually on his face and pulsing through his body is gone. He looks serene for the first time ever.

"Come to bed?" I ask. He gets up, pulls his shirt off and climbs into bed with me. He pulls me close to him and wraps me securely in his arms.

"Thank you." He whispers.

"For what?"

"Believing in me."

I don't reply, I just hug him a little harder and he relaxes beneath my touch.

Eric may be many of the things he believes himself to be, but what stands out the most is he's honest. He doesn't sugar coat anything, and he certainly doesn't hide himself behind false hopes and lies. If anything, he struggles to be who he really is and is unable to embrace the kindness and vulnerability he keeps buried deep inside. He's never had a relationship. He's never had someone, outside of his family, care for him or his well being. He probably never been in love, and all of the things about him that should frighten me invigorate me instead.

I'm startled awake by banging on our door. Eric jumps out of bed and motions for me to stay put. He opens the door a crack and I hear someone tell him that everyone needs to meet in the dining hall immediately. He closes the door and we both look out the window.

"Somethings not right." He says.

"What do you think it is?"

"I'm not sure. I don't want you to leave my side, ok? You stay with me. Here." He hands me a gun and I tuck it into my waist band. We both get dressed and leave our room. He grabs my hand and we walk towards Johanna's office. We find her at her desk, typing furiously on her tablet.

"Johanna, what's going on?" Eric asks.

"Tobias Eaton is here requesting refuge. He claims to be separated from his mother's cause. We need to take a vote to allow him to stay, and unfortunately I will need to do the same for you and Tris as to not show you preferential treatment."

"Johanna, you can't allow him to stay here. He's a traitor. He delivered me to Jeanine." I reply.

"According to our records Eric is also a traitor. It's unfair for me to turn Tobias away without turning you away too." She replies looking at Eric.

"He thinks we're dead. If he sees us he'll report back to Evelyn and Marcus. It will also put our factionless informant's life in danger." Eric replies.

"My hands are tied." Johanna replies. "I'm so sorry."

"We have to go." Eric says to me and I nod in agreement. "Johanna, thank you for your hospitality, can we ask that you not mention us to Tobias?"

"I won't, and I'm very sorry again. Take care of each other." She replies.

Eric and I walk out of Johanna's office and go back to our room to gather our things. Then we start walking towards the train tracks.

"Eric, where are we going? Back to Abnegation?"

"No. Candor. I've sent a message to Caleb as well." He replies. "It's time to clear my name, and to get ourselves prepared to take on the factionless."

We run next to the train and Eric jumps on the train first to make sure no one else is in the car. He signals for for me to jump on. He helps me into the car and then just wraps his arms around me. I'm startled.

"I'm going to do everything I can to keep you safe." He murmurs against my ear.

"What's wrong?" I ask.

"As soon as we get there they will arrest me. I need you to find someone you trust, anyone, and stay with them until I can get back to you. Promise me."

"Aren't Caleb and the others on their way?" I ask.

"Caleb is waiting for Edward to rejoin them. He said Peter is going to lead a small group to Candor soon." He replies. "Promise me you will find someone and stay with them, just in case they're not there when we arrive."

"Eric, you're scaring me. Is something wrong?" I pull away from him and make eye contact.

"No. I just don't know how long I'll have to wait to go through my trial and I don't want anything to happen to you. Leaving you alone was never part of the plan."

"I'll find someone, don't worry ok? I'll stay safe." I reply.

Eric stares at me, his eyebrows furrowed like he is deep in thought. He pulls me close, and leans in pausing to give me a chance to pull away from him but when I don't he crashes his lips into mine. He kisses me gently, when he licks my bottom lip for entrance I part my lips and he slips his tongue into my mouth. Our tongues dance together and he's holding me tighter. He pulls back from the kiss and looks at me while gently caressing my face.

"It wasn't a mistake." He whispers to me.

"What? Kissing me?" I ask.

"I told you that what happened earlier was a mistake. It wasn't. I don't regret any of it." He replies.

"I know." I reply. "I told you I can see through your mask. You can get as pissed at me as much as you want, and you can try to push me away, but it won't work."

He studies my face for a few moments, almost as if he's trying to figure out a puzzle.

"It's almost time to jump." He says. We separate and jump off the train and start to make our way to Candor. Eric quickly grabs my hand and pulls me close to him.

Once inside we immediately see a group of Dauntless black. I quickly scan the group for a familiar face and before I can say anything I see Tori running towards me.

"What has he done to you?" She yells, pulling me away from Eric. "Guards!" She yells.

"Tori, he's with me, he saved my life." I plead. Eric's soon surrounded by fellow Dauntless guards and he's being forced to the floor and handcuffed.

"He's a faction traitor, he deserves to die." Tori spits, pulling out her weapon and pointing at Eric.

"No!" I cry, jumping in between Tori and Eric. "You can't kill him. Let him have a trial, please. Hear his truth." I beg. "Please Tori, for me, please."

Tori stares at Eric hard and soon the leader of Candor, Jack Kang, joins us.

"Tori, he and Four are the only surviving Dauntless leaders, and both are marked as traitors. We need to give him a trial. I can assure you if he is found guilty of his crimes that Dauntless will have full jurisdiction to handle him however you deem fit." Jack says.

Tori lowers her weapon, "Fine. Get him away from me." She replies angrily. Eric is being forced back to his feet.

"Wait!" I yell. I walk over to Eric and put my arms around him. "You're going to be fine." Eric leans in and kisses me softly.

"Stay with Tori. Don't leave her side. Even if she hates me, she loves you and will protect you. Tris you stay safe, please." Eric yells as he's being pulled away from me. "Tori, take care of her, keep her safe!"

Tori looks at Eric then back at me. "Tris, you have some explaining to do."


	4. Chapter 4

**To anyone who's left me a review in the last few days I thank you, but unfortunately due to an issue with this website I'm unable to view any new reviews. Hopefully it'll be fixed soon, but please feel free to PM me if there was something that you left in a review that needed attention. Thanks to all of you for reading. Enjoy.**

Tris POV

"What the fuck is going on Tris?" Tori asks, clearly exasperated.

"I don't even know where to start." I answer honestly.

"Well, you can start by telling me why on earth you are kissing a fucking traitor. Oh and tell me where the hell your boyfriend is! Jack keeps spouting this traitor nonsense about Four. Tris, where is he?"

"Four isn't my anything. He and his father are traitors working for Jeanine and the factionless. Four's supposedly dead mother is very much alive and leading the factionless. Eric isn't a traitor, he saved me from Jeanine. He was working with a small group to stop her. My brother Caleb, Peter, Uriah, Marlene, Lynn, Christina and Will are part of our group. We have a mole within the factionless too. Tori, this is big. Jeanine might be dead, but the factionless are working with the Daunless traitors and Jeanine's loyals to overthrow the government. We're not sure what they are planning to do but Edward, who is our factionless mole, is gathering information."

"Oh my god, Tris. Four? A traitor? I just can't believe it. Does Eric even have any proof of what he's alleging?" She asks.

"He showed me camera footage of Four attacking me, and of he and Marcus delivering me to Erudite. I didn't believe them at first either, but it's true. Plus, Eric knew he'd be arrested here and he wants to go under the truth serum to clear his name." I reply. Over Tori's shoulder, I see a very familiar face approaching.

"Zeke!" I cry out, running to him. He scoops me up in his arms and twirls me in a circle, planting sloppy kisses all over my face.

"Tris, I thought you were dead. I'm so glad to see you. Where have you been?" He asks.

I fill both of them in on what I remember from my time in Erudite, my time in Abnegation and in Amity, and our move from Amity to Candor.

"My brother is alive." Zeke says with tears in his eyes. "Thank god. I can't believe Four. Fuck. He's my best friend."

"I can't either." I shake my head.

"But Eric? He was working with Jeanine." Zeke replies. "We saw them meet, many times."

"I think you'll find a different version once they put him under truth serum. It's not my story to tell." I reply.

"Do you believe whatever it is that he's told you?" Zeke asks.

"Yes. Right now, he's one of the few I do trust. He saved my life."

"I don't believe him. My brother is dead because of him Tris. Even if he suddenly had grown a conscious, he has blood on his hands from all of the divergents he killed." Tori says bitterly.

We're interrupted by an announcement. "The trial of Eric Coulter will start in 15 minutes, all interested parties need to gather. Thank you."

"Damn, that was quick." Zeke remarks.

"Jack doesn't fuck around when it comes to war criminals." Tori says evenly.

Zeke, Tori and I head to the main conference room and it's standing room only. We force our way towards the front and wait. Eric is brought in, still handcuffed and being roughly handled by his guards. He looks panicked as he scans the crowd until he finds me. He sees me surrounded by Zeke and Tori and relief washes over his features. He meets my eyes and holds my gaze.

"Eric Coulter, you've been accused of murder, conspiracy to commit murder and treason. You will be injected with truth serum and questioned. May the truth set you free." Jack Kang says as he injects the truth serum into Eric's neck. Although his expression has softened, his eyes still don't leave mine.

"Please state your name."

"Eric Coulter"

"To which faction were you born?"

"Erudite."

"To which faction did you transfer?"

"Dauntless."

"To which faction are you loyal?"

"Dauntless." There are murmurs passing through the crowd, Jack holds his hand up in an effort to quiet us.

"Did you work with Jeanine Matthews at any point in her efforts to overthrow Abnegation?"

"Yes." There are shouts of "traitor" throughout the crowd.

"Quiet!" Jack shouts. "Why were you working for Jeanine?"

"I was forced to."

"Please explain."

"When I was a dependent in Erudite Jeanine forced me to choose Dauntless so she could use me. Her plan was for me to become a leader so that I could excercise my influence within leadership to lean more toward her goals. She also wanted me to hunt for divergents."

"How was Jeanine able to force you into this?"

"She threatened my life. My aptitude test was an equal split between Dauntless and Erudite. She wanted to use me as a Guinea pig for her testing and kill me when she was finished with me. I wanted to live, so I agreed to do whatever she wanted."

"You're divergent?"

"Yes." Another murmur runs through then crowd but it's quickly silenced.

"Once in Dauntless, what kind of work did you perform for Jeanine?"

"As little as possible to stay under the radar. She wanted me in leadership, but I came in second place in my training class. Fortunately, the first place initiate turned down leadership the first time he was offered, so I quickly got an offer. Once in leadership, she pressured me to vote her way, but I was outnumbered at first because at that time only Max was loyal to her cause. My main assignment became divergents. I couldn't bring myself to turn any divergents in, nor could I kill them, so I began helping them escape. There are many divergents whose deaths have been faked by me, and they are living in Abnegation, Amity or are factionless." A loud gasp goes through the room and Tori is shaking next to me. I look over at her and she says "George."

Eric must see her reaction. "Yes, George Wu is alive." He says and Tori breaks down in tears next to me.

"Quiet, now!" Jack shouts. "What other assignments did Jeanine task you with?"

"She took a special interest in Tris Prior due to her unusual aptitude testing results. I was tasked with bringing Tris to Jeanine so that she could be used as the main test subject. I never knew exactly why she wanted her, I was only told she was the perfect subject."

"Did you turn Tris Prior over to Jeanine?"

"No."

"But from what I understand, Tris Prior was in Jeanine's custody for several days. How did that happen if it was not you?"

"She was turned over to Jeanine by Marcus Eaton and his son Tobias, also known as Four." Loud shouts erupt from the Dauntless, and Jack has a hard time maintaining order. Zeke lets out a loud "Holy shit" next to me.

"What happened then?"

"We discovered that the factionless, which was being led by Evelyn, Marcus and Four Eaton were also working with Jeanine. I was working with Caleb Prior, Peter Hayes, Uriah Pedrad, Christina Keller, Will Davis, Marlene Wood, Lynn Baker and Edward Michaelson against Jeanine and the factionless. We were all working as moles, acting like we were loyal to the cause in order to gather enough information and power to take them down."

"What happened to Jeanine?"

"I killed her." The crowd murmurs and gasps but soon quiets.

"Why did you kill her instead of capturing her?"

Eric starts struggling for the first time, visibly wincing in pain.

"Eric, fighting the serum only makes it more painful. Answer the question."

"I needed to stop the simulation, and also rescue Tris Prior. Jeanine was fighting against me, and she had a weapon of her own within reach. I killed her before she had a chance to use it."

"Couldn't you have incapacitated her?"

"I chose not to. She had my family killed because I didn't perform up to her standards. I felt that she didn't deserve my mercy." The crowd loudly breaks into gasps again. Jack has to shout to quiet us down.

"I see. What happened after you killed Jeanine?"

"I removed the leads from Tris, picked her up and began running from the room. I met with Caleb and Peter, and they helped me carry Tris. As we were attempting to leave the building, we were stopped by Max. His intent was to kill Tris, to finish the job that Jeanine had started. The orders were to kill Tris once Jeanine was finished with her."

"How did you incapacitate Max?"

"I shot him. He had pulled a gun on Tris and I reacted. My shot killed him."

"Did you intend to kill Max?"

"No. He was like a father to me. I desperately wanted him to do the right thing, but he wouldn't. When he pulled his weapon, I had a choice to make. I couldn't let him kill Tris."

"Eric, when faced with a choice between someone you considered a father and Tris, what made you choose to kill Max?"

"I couldn't let him kill her." Eric is once again struggling against the serum.

"You're fighting the serum again. Whatever you're trying not to say needs to be said."

"I couldn't let him kill her because she didn't deserve what was being done to her. She's a good person, she's strong and she's pure." Eric winces in pain. "During the time I was tasked to watch her, I became attached to her." He's still struggling against pain, sweating and his face is reddening. "I fell in love with her." He no longer looks to be in pain, but he looks completely surprised at the words he just spoke. His eyes dart to find mine but he quickly looks away and at the floor in front of him. Tori and Zeke both look at me and I simply shake my head. I have no idea how to process what just happened.

"I see. So protecting her was personal, and morally what you felt was the right thing to do?"

"Yes."

"Eric, did you have anything to do with Jeanine's simulation?"

"No, other than stopping it once I had the chance."

"Eric, did you want any of those innocent people to die?"

He looks at me again, this time holding our eye contact. "No, absolutely not. My family was killed because of her genocide. Tris's parents were killed too." He has silent tears running down his face, and I can feel my own warm tears streaming down my own.

"Eric, did you willingly participate in the planning or execution of Jeanine Matthew's plans?"

"No. Never."

"Eric, did you premeditate the killing Jeanine Matthews or Maximus Powell?"

"No. I killed both because I felt like lives, including my own, were in danger."

"Eric, did you kill anyone at the direction of Jeanine Matthews, or at the direction of any other person involved in this war?"

"No."

"Eric, we ask this question of anyone who is under truth serum. What is your biggest regret?"

The pain is back in full force and very evident across his features. It's obvious to everyone watching that he doesn't want to answer this. "Being alive, I should have let her kill me when she wanted to. My life isn't worth the many others who were lost." He whispers before more tears start to fall. I can't stop the small sob that escapes my lips.

"Thank you for your Candor." Jack says and the crowd repeats it. "Eric Coulter, we find you innocent of all charges against you. We recommend that the traitor status be removed from your name, and that your position as a leader of Dauntless is restored. You are free to go." He removes Eric's handcuffs and Eric quickly exits the stage area. The crowd is restless and it seems to almost be crushing me. Zeke grabs my hand and I reach for Tori's as he leads us through the crowd and out to a corridor.

"I don't even know what to say." Zeke says, running a hand down his face.

"We have to make a plan. You heard what he said, the factionless are organizing." Tori replies.

"Let's make a plan then." Eric says as he walks up to us.

"Eric, you said my brother is alive. Is there any way to contact him?" Tori asks.

"I'll send a message to Johanna to see if she can get him in contact. Last I'd heard, he and Amar were living in Amity." He replies.

"Thank you." Tori says, she places her hand on Eric's arm.

"I wish I could have told you. I couldn't compromise you or our plan to bring Jeanine down." He replies.

"I'm just glad I know now. I'm sorry that I misjudged you." She squeezes his arm before dropping her hand. "Ok, what's our plan?"

"We need to get Dauntless back together. We need to go after the factionless. Tori, Zeke can you gather everyone and find somewhere for us to meet?" He asks.

"Yeah. There's a large conference room on the third floor. It is right next to the stairwell and it has large double doors that lead into it, you can't miss it. Head that way and we'll bring everyone we have here with us." Zeke says. He and Tori take off.

I start to walk away and a hand on my shoulder stops me. "Tris." He says.

I turn to face him. "We should go find the conference room. Have you heard from Caleb or Peter?"

"I need to pick my tablet up from Jack's office, then we can head up." We first stop by Jack's where his assistant quickly gives Eric his tablet back. We head off in search of the conference room and find it to be empty. Eric sits and looks over his communications on his tablet.

"Peter, Lynn, Christina and Will left earlier, so we should get word out for them to find us." I nod in agreement while pacing. "Tris, are you ok?" He asks.

"Shouldn't I be asking you that?" I ask, while looking out the window. Before he has a chance to say more there are Dauntless filing into the room, finding places to sit. Some are talking to Eric, some seem apprehensive. I soon see Shauna, so I head over to her.

"Hey, I'm so glad you're ok." I say while hugging her.

"Same to you. Oh gosh Tris, I'm so sorry to hear about Four. Zeke and I never saw any signs of it. But, knowing what we do now his sudden decision to accept the leadership position makes sense. He never wanted that position." She replies.

"I didn't know him at all. Do you know that the morning the sim started he told me he loved me? What kind of mind fuck is that?" I ask.

"Maybe as much as hearing Eric say the same. What's going on there?" She asks.

"No idea. He and I have bonded, but I had no clue he felt like that."

"Based on his reaction during the testimony I don't think he had a clue he felt that way either." She replies.

"I think that's accurate." I reply, nodding at her. I look up and find Eric's stormy grey eyes on me. I quickly look away. "Wow, there are a lot more Dauntless here than I thought." I say to Shauna.

"This is about all of us. It's unfortunate that so many are traitors." She replies sadly. "I didn't even know where my sister was until Eric's testimony."

"Yeah Lynn is with our group. Eric found her while he was out scouting one day. She's on her way back with Peter, Will and Christina."

Shauna smiles and hugs me. "That's the best news I've had in awhile. Hector is with the traitors." She says sadly.

"I'm sorry to hear that Shauna, that's awful." She nods.

I hear a loud whistle and look up. Tori is standing on a chair "Ok I think this is everyone" she yells. "You all witnessed Eric's testimony and since it's obvious he's not a traitor he's been reinstated as our only leader. The only other living leader is Four, and he's a traitor. We need new leadership, can we get some nominees?"

"You!" Someone shouts and there are cheers.

"Ok who else?" She asks.

"Zeke!" I yell and more cheers erupt.

"Great, next? We need two more." She yells.

"Tris!" Eric yells. The room cheers again.

"Shauna!" Someone yells and we loudly cheer.

"Ok, Eric is our head leader, and Shauna, Tris, Zeke and I are your new leaders. Thank you all! I'll pass the floor to Eric."

"Thanks Tori. First thing everyone needs to know is that Four showed up at Amity last night looking for refuge. He told Johanna he had defected from his mother's plans. I'm sure she'll send him here, because she is who sent me here. We're going to have to give him a trial." Eric says and the room erupts in angry shouts.

"Shut up!" Zeke yells and we quiet down. "Everyone, including him, deserves a chance to tell his truth." Many nod in agreement.

"Next, we have a mole living amongst the factionless. We will have a new report from him tomorrow when he rejoins our group. We already know that we are outnumbered, the loyal Erudite's, Dauntless traitors and Factionless have the obvious manpower. We will need to speak with Amity, the remaining Abnegation and Candor to see if we can recruit soldiers for our cause."

"What's our cause?" Someone shouts.

"Not allowing the Eaton's to take over the factions and government. We'll need to meet again once we have our report from Edward tomorrow. In the meantime, we need to stick together here and reconvene tomorrow. Any other questions?"

"Where are the rest of the Dauntless?"

"We have received some communications that indicate that there are soldiers living in the Dauntless compound. We've sent some scouts out to determine if these are Dauntless traitors or loyal Dauntless. If we find that the compound is safe, my recommendation will be to return to the compound in several groups." Eric replies.

No one asks anything else, so Eric adjourns our impromptu meeting. He signals for the leaders to stay behind.

"Johanna messaged me, Four will be leaving Amity after a short rest. He'll be on his way here." Eric says.

"What are we gonna do with him?" Zeke asks.

"Same thing we did with Eric." Shauna replies. "He gets truth serum and we see what the fuck he's been doing."

"Agreed." Tori replies. "I doubt were going to like what we hear, but we all need to hear it." She looks at me while saying that last part.

"Tris, do you have anything to say?" Shauna asks.

"No." I reply. Tori narrows her eyes at me, but says nothing.

"You two must be exhausted. Let me show you where you can stay." Tori says and we follow her out of the room.

"I'll find you clothes." Shauna says and Zeke nods.

Eric grabs my hand and we follow Tori through several halls until she finds what she's looking for. "We're all staying on this hall. We're going to have to double up, especially knowing we have more on the way. You two ok sharing?" She asks looking down at our hands.

"Yes, fine." I answer. She points us into a room.

"There's a door all the way at the end of the hall that is the showers and bathroom. It's not as bad at the Dauntless dorms, but it's certainly very open. There's actually a ton of bathroom supplies in there already. The people here are annoyingly honest, but they're also very accommodating. You guys rest, we'll wake you if you're needed." She says while exiting the room and closing the door behind herself.

"Which bed do you want?" Eric asks me. I shrug. He puts his arms around me tentatively. "Do you want to talk about it?" He asks.

"Not yet. Can we sleep?" I ask. He drops his arms and sighs.

"Yeah." He tugs his shirt and pants off, leaving him in his boxers. He lays on the bed closest to him.

I take my pants and hoodie off leaving me in a tank top and my panties. I look over at the empty bed, and back to Eric. He's laying on his back with one arm slung over his face, shielding his eyes. I crawl in bed with him. "Scoot over." I say.

"Yes ma'am." He replies with a chuckle, then scoots to the wall, he pulls me closer to him. I look up at him and lean in to kiss him. I can tell I've caught him off guard, but he quickly kisses me back. I part my lips and he gently slides his tongue to mine. We don't go any further, just kissing and holding each other.

"I need time to process it, and I think you do too. Can we leave it at that for now? When either of us are truly ready to have that conversation, we let the other know. Will that work?" I ask.

"Yes." He replies while gently rubbing my back.

"Just don't start pushing me away." I reply.

"Don't let me." He replies quietly.

"Deal." I reply before closing my eyes. I'm too far gone to hear anything else he says.

I jump when I hear the door to our room creak open. Our windowless room is quite dark, and the sliver of light from the corridor casts a dark shadow on the figure in the room.

"Hello?" I tentatively call out.

"Tris, we just got here." The voice belongs to Peter. "Everyone's ok, just dead tired. Do you mind if I crash in here?" He quietly asks.

"Not at all, you can take that bed. Where's everyone else?" I whisper.

"Lynn is bunking with Zeke and Shauna. Tori put Chris and Will in her room. She sent me down here thinking you two might have an extra bed." He replies with a yawn.

"Get some rest, they'll wake us if anything happens." I reply and within almost seconds of him crawling into his bed I hear Peter's soft snores.

I turn over to get comfortable but it causes Eric to stir. He buries his head in my neck and instead of falling back to sleep I feel him kissing my neck.

"Eric." I whisper. "We have a roommate."

"Who?" He asks sleepily.

"Peter. His group just got in, safe and sound."

"Good." He whispers.

He continues to kiss my neck, moving up to my jaw and then my lips. I lightly trace my fingers on his cheeks and jawline, then behind his ear and I skim my fingers across the sides of his hair, where he keeps it almost shaved. His hair is incredibly soft and I move my fingers to the longer hair on the top of his head, which is curly without any of his usual hair products. He relaxes to my touch. I move my fingers down and gently skim his eyelids, then down his cheeks and across his lips. His slightly fuller lower lip is soft and warm to the touch, in contrast to the piercing he has towards the corner of his lower lip, which is cold. When he feels my fingers stop on his lips he kisses them.

"That feels really good." He whispers before kissing me softly again.

"Eric, what you said earlier about your biggest regret, you're wrong. You're important to me, and you're so much more than you give yourself credit for." I whisper. I can't see his face because the room is so dark, but I can feel his hand on my cheek and he brings our lips together and kisses me tenderly. He then moves his head back under my chin while I rub his shoulders and back. Soon he falls back to sleep.

The next time I'm woken, it's by Eric. He's still laying in bed holding me, but he's kneading my shoulders and back a bit.

"Tris, we have to get up." He says.

"Whats wrong?" I ask.

"Four's here." I try to sit up but Eric keeps his arms around me. "Tris, it's ok. They just arrested him. Zeke said they are planning on starting his trial in an hour." He replies.

"Ok, I'm calm. Can I get up now?" I ask. In the shadows of our room I can see Peter sitting up on the side of his bed, rubbing his eyes. Eric moves his arms from around my waist but when he starts rubbing my back I decide not to move.

"Did Zeke really just say Four is here?" He asks.

"Yeah. They're going to put him under truth serum and question him. That's what they did to me earlier, and I was able to clear my name." Eric replies.

"I heard. I'm glad to hear it, and also glad to hear that we have new leadership." Peter replies. "Do we have a plan yet?"

"We're waiting on Edward's return so we can find out what exactly the factionless are up to, plus Eric sent scouts out to the a Dauntless compound to find out who is living there." I reply.

"It also will be pretty insightful to hear what Four has to say." Eric says from behind me. My whole body tenses at the thought. Eric continues to knead my aching muscles.

"Has anyone heard from Caleb?" I ask.

"Could you pass me my tablet?" Eric asks, I unplug it from its charger on the nightstand and hand it to him.

"They're still waiting for Edward. Caleb says the agreed time is by midnight tonight. If Edward doesn't make it there by then, they've agreed to head here without him." Eric replies.

"Do you think Edward is ok?" I ask.

"I think so. Midnight tonight was the original agreed upon time. He's usually pretty good about slipping around unnoticed." Peter replies. "I'm going to shower and then head to the conference room. See you both there." He says before walking out the door with his bag.

"Are you going to be ok?" Eric asks.

"I don't know. I have no idea what to expect." I reply. I can feel the tears burning in the back of my eyes. Eric kisses my shoulder. I turn around to face him. "You're surprisingly good at snuggling. I'd never think that of you." He smiles.

"Nice deflection. I'll allow it." He replies before kissing me. His hands are under my tank top, running up and down my back. I feel him move his hands farther down, cupping my ass and then skimming the back of my thighs. He pulls me closer to him and deepens our kiss. He moves so he's hovering over me slightly, and I adjust so that I'm lying on my back. His hands skim my breasts over my shirt, and I am unable to hold back the shiver it causes. I can feel him smile against my neck as he's peppering kisses there. He slowly moves his hand further down until he's gently rubbing me outside of my panties. He moves my panties to the side and slides his fingers through my wet folds. I can feel his calloused fingers circling my clit and I moan softly. He takes that as encouragement as he slowly slides one finger inside of me, using his thumb to continue his strokes against my overstimulated bundle. I reach out and start stroking his erection through his boxers and he quickly adjusts himself so that he can slide his boxers down, freeing his manhood.

"I should lock the door." I whisper to him and he hums in response before reluctantly removing his hands from me. I jump out of bed, lock the door and finish undressing before getting back into bed. Eric quickly latches his mouth onto one of my hard nipples, and moves on top of me, sliding his cock through my wet folds a few times before entering me. I jump slightly at the unexpected intrusion, but we quickly start moving our hips in sync. I part my legs further for him, and his thrusts cause his pelvic bone to continuously skim over my clit, which is pushing me quickly over the edge.

I lightly scrape my nails up and down his back, causing a moan of pleasure from him. He leans down and captures my mouth with his, sucking my bottom lip before attacking my neck with kisses and gentle nips.

I arch my back, meeting him thrust for thrust. I wrap my arms around his shoulders in an effort to pull our bodies closer together.

"Tris, I'm gonna cum." He whispers to me, kissing me forcefully while I shatter around him. Within seconds of my orgasm, I can feel him spilling inside of me while softly calling out my name. He kisses my shoulder where his head is resting while he catches his breath.

"We have to get dressed." I whisper to him and he groans. He kisses me hard before pulling out of me and crawling out of bed. He turns a dim lamp on before looking at me.

"You're gorgeous." He says, giving me another quick kiss before tugging me out of bed. We both get dressed in some of the clothes Zeke and Shauna left for us. We walk to the bathroom together, where we quickly shower and get dressed before heading out.

Eric reaches out his hand and I take it. We walk down to the gathering room and find our group of friends sitting together. Christina sees me and waves us over. I give her a quick hug.

"I'm so glad you're here." I say.

"Are you ready for this?" She asks, face full of concern.

"I don't have much of a choice. I'll be fine." I reply, sitting down next to her. Eric quickly sits on my other side and I feel his hand on my thigh. Christina notices, but thankfully doesn't say anything. We see Jack Kang enter the stage area, followed closely by Dauntless guards. For the first time in over two weeks I see dark blue eyes staring intently into mine.


	5. Chapter 5

Tris POV

 _ **Flashback** :_

 _"I need to find my parents." I say to Tobias as soon as we finally break away from the other sim controlled Dauntless soldiers._

 _"We will find them. Let's try your house." He replies. "Lead the way. I'll cover you."_

 _I begin to walk toward my childhood home, passing by bodies clad in grey. I try to block these images from my mind as I keep staring straight ahead. I turn to speak to Tobias and he's gone. I begin to panic._

 _"Four?" I say as loud as I'm comfortable with, trying not to draw attention to myself. I frantically start to look for him, inside of the houses and in the alleys, calling his name as loudly as I dare. He's nowhere to be found, almost like he vanished. I soon see two figures in black walking towards me and I quickly duck in the alley closest to me, hoping that I didn't catch their attention._

 _The soldiers keep approaching, and I notice the sounds of their boots seem to be in sync. These must be some of the sim controlled Dauntless. I look around and there's nowhere to hide, and there's only one way out of this alley. I swallow my emotions and keep a blank face, stepping out of the alley and marching. I see that I'm now walking towards the two_ _, and once some of the distance between us is closed I can tell that these are not sim controlled soldiers. It's too late for me to change direction, so I march forward only to find that it's Eric and another man who I recognize but who's name I don't remember. Panic immediately starts to rise in my chest._

 _I stare straight ahead, my blank face betraying no emotion. Once we are practically face to face, Eric's companion stops me._

 _"How is this one walking alone? Little Beatrice Prior. Wasn't she on Jeanine's list Eric?" He asks._

 _"She was at one point Martin, but as I had reported there were no signs." Eric replies almost sounding bored._

 _"It's interesting that she's managed to break away from formation. I think she might be faking." Martin replies. I can feel the cold sweat rolling down my back._

 _"Martin, I watched her like a hawk, she's not divergent. She's probably somehow looking for number boy. Even in a simulation they're attached at the fucking hip."_

 _"There's one way to find out." Martin quickly draws his weapon and points it at my head. This is it, they will finally get what they want. They're going to kill me. I'm never going to see my parents again. What about Caleb, was he a part of this? Eric's voice breaks my internal monologue._

 _"Hey, that's really not a good idea. We may have determined she's not divergent, but Jeanine still wants her. Why don't you cuff her and we'll take her to Jeanine?" Eric asks._

 _Martin's eyes are twitching, and he appears to be having an internal struggle as to whether to kill me or listen to Eric. Finally, he lowers his weapon and begins to look down to his belt for his cuffs. In a split second, Eric knocks him out with the butt of his rifle. I'm frozen in place, desperately trying not to show any emotion. Eric must want to be the one to actually kill me._

 _"Tris, I know you can hear me, run." Eric says. I stand still, unsure of what to do. This has to be a trap. Tobias told me about Eric, he hunts and kills divergents. He wants me dead. He squats down and checks Martin for a pulse, then stands in front of me and puts his face in front of mine._

 _"He's going to wake up soon. You have to go Tris. You have to go right now before someone finds you. Get far away from this area. Look at me Tris, I know you hear me, I know what you are." He grabs my arm and pulls me towards him. "I know you don't trust me but I swear I'm not going to hurt you. You have to get away from here, and you have to stay away from Four. Get to Amity." I can't stop myself from shaking, fear is starting to overcome me. Eric looks down at my arm and I realize he can feel my tremors. He gently squeezes my arm and then moves both hands to my face, gently cupping my cheeks._

 _"Tris, look at me, we don't have a lot of time. I want you to live, do you hear me?" I finally move my eyes to his. For the first time since I've known Eric, there is absolutely no malice on his face or in his eyes. "I promise I'm not going to hurt you, but I can't stay with you either, not yet. Tris, run. Four is not who you think he is, please stay away from him and stay safe. Get to Amity, Johanna will protect you. I'll find you when this is all over, I promise. Now go!" He swipes his thumbs across my cheeks gently before releasing me, and I finally start running away from him._

 _I steal one quick glance over my shoulder and I see Eric's grey eyes trained on me, watching me run away. He's letting me get away. He actually helped me get away. Why?_

 _ **End** **Flashback**_

He looks different. Hair dirty and wild, and a little longer than the Abnegation style cut he's aways maintained, curling slightly towards the ends. He has a light beard growing and his eyes are dark, almost black. He's nervous, looking all around the room at the sea of Dauntless black. His hands are cuffed behind his back, and he walks with a slight limp. No matter where his eyes flit, he always manages to find mine. I can't look away. The way he is looking at me is intoxicating, his expression changes from confusion, to happiness to despair in a matter of seconds. It's as if he's trying to communicate with me without speaking. He's seeing a ghost right now; he thought I was dead.

I feel the hand on my thigh move and Eric grasps my hand in his. Christina shifts nervously next to me, eventually leaning over and whispering in my ear.

"Are you going to be ok? You're shaking." She says. I didn't even realize how my body is outwardly reacting to seeing him. I finally look over at Christina and she reaches out and wipes under my eyes with her thumbs. "Don't cry." She whispers and gestures over my shoulder at Eric. "Get your strength from the good guys, ok?" I nod.

"I'm starting to remember things, I don't know if they are things that were blocked out of my mind or if it's from whatever Jeanine gave me, but these memories seem real and not like the nightmares at all." I whisper to Christina and she nods.

As she's about to reply we're interrupted by Jack Kang's clear voice. "Tobias Eaton, you've been accused of murder, conspiracy to commit murder and treason. You will be injected with truth serum and questioned. May the truth set you free." He injects the truth serum into Four's neck. His expression hardens.

"Please state your name."

"Tobias Eaton. I preferred to be called Four."

"To which faction were you born?"

"Abnegation."

"To which faction did you transfer?"

"Dauntless."

"To which faction are you loyal?"

"Dauntless." There are murmurs passing through the crowd, Jack holds his hand up in an effort to quiet us.

"Are you currently a member of Dauntless?"

"No. I left. I want to come back."

"Why did you leave?"

"My mother reached out to me. I thought she was dead. She left me 11 years ago, and she faked her death. She's been living factionless. She reached out to me several months ago and she and I started spending time together. She led me to believe she wanted a relationship with me."

"When did you decide to leave Dauntless?"

"I had decided to leave a couple of months ago, but I hadn't actually left yet."

"Why is that?"

He moves his dark eyes to catch mine. "My girlfriend, Tris Prior. I love her and I didn't want to leave her. I hoped that she would leave with me." The crowd once again begins murmuring, a quick look from Jack quiets them.

"Did you work with Jeanine Matthews at any point in her efforts to overthrow Abnegation?"

"Indirectly." He seems to struggle against the serum.

"Until you answer the questions honestly and completely the serum will cause pain." Jack warns.

"I was led to believe that my mother was against Jeanine. I found out the day of the war that she was in fact working with Jeanine and also Marcus Eaton."

"Once you found out that your mother was working with Jeanine and Marcus, did you decide to work with her or against her?"

"For her, but I wasn't given all of the information. My mother led me to believe that she was playing both Jeanine and Marcus against each other. I still believed she was doing something good." I can't help the gasp that escapes my lips. Eric's grip on my hand tightens.

"Did you willingly kill anyone at the direction of Evelyn Eaton, Marcus Eaton or Jeanine Matthews?"

Four jerks his head towards Jack Kang, his expression unreadable.

"Answer the question." Jack replies evenly.

"It wasn't willingly. I was given some sort of serum that made me follow orders without question."

"Who gave you this serum?"

"Evelyn."

"Four, did you kill anyone while under the influence of this serum?"

"Yes."

"Who?"

His eyes meet mine. I see the eyes of the man who helped me hide my divergence. Who bared his soul to me. Who gently and carefully gave me his virginity while taking mine. The man who tenderly told me he loved me just weeks ago. His eyes plead with me.

"The church. There were a group of Abnegation council members hiding in the basement of the church. I led a small group of soldiers inside and we killed everyone."

"Did you recognize anyone you killed personally?"

"Josiah Granger, Robert Black." He starts swaying slightly, eyes locked on mine, seemingly trying to convey something to me. "Andrew Prior, Natalie Prior."

"You bastard! You killed my parents!" The scream rips through me before I can even think. Jack gestures towards me and two guards approach.

"I didn't want to. I'm so sorry Tris. I didn't want any of this." Tobias says, looking directly at me.

"You only speak to me, and only answer the questions I ask." Jack says to Tobias.

"Don't make me leave, please." I cry out, fighting against the guards.

"I'll keep her quiet. She needs to stay, please. I'll take responsibility for her." I hear Eric plead with the guards. Jack nods his head and they retreat. "Tris, you have to stay quiet, ok? I'm here, Christina's here." I lean into his touch, quietly crying while he rubs circles on my back.

"How did you manage to break free from the serum?" Jack asks.

"I'm not entirely sure. I woke up in the middle of the night with an awareness I hadn't felt in awhile. I decided to leave the factionless and defect to Amity. Johanna Reyes informed me of my traitor status and sent me here."

"Tobias Eaton, did you willingly defect from Dauntless to join the Factionless?"

"Yes."

"Did you willingly participate in the war plans of Evelyn Eaton?"

"No."

"Did you willingly participate in the war plans of Jeanine Matthews?"

"No."

"Did you willingly participate in the war plans of Marcus Eaton?"

"No."

"Did you willingly deliver Tris Prior to Jeanine Matthews?"

"No."

"Did you willingly kill anyone?"

"No."

"Tobias Eaton, what was your plan when you decided to leave Dauntless to follow Evelyn Eaton?"

"To have a relationship with my mother."

There are murmurs amongst the crowd again. I can hear bits and pieces of conversations, most are wondering how a mother could manipulate and use her own child. I want to scream that he left willingly but I stay quiet.

Jack pauses, and glances over to Eric. He gestures for Eric to come forward, I move to sit close to Christina so he can walk to the stage.

"Eric Coulter, this decision falls outside of the Candor jurisdiction. We willingly and respectfully transfer judicial control to Dauntless."

Eric sighs and glares at Four. "Tobias Eaton, you are guilty of being a faction traitor and as a result we strip you of your Dauntless leadership. I move to delay judgment of the other charges until we can medically prove that you were under the influence of a serum. Sentencing for your crimes will follow, to be determined by Dauntless leadership. Until then, I order you to be incarcerated here at Candor. Please take him to his cell."

We all watch as Tobias is led away. His eyes never leave mine.

"Tris, what can we do?" Christina asks me. I'm slightly aware of another person sitting beside me and I turn to see Peter.

"Hey, do you want to go back to the room?" He asks. I look up to the stage area and I see Eric and Jack Kang deep in conversation.

"Yes." I reply. I feel Peter reaching out to help me up and I robotically follow behind him. We make it to our room and I quickly lie in the bed I was sharing with Eric.

"Tris, do you need anything? Do you want to talk about it?" Christina asks.

"Not right now." I reply.

I can hear Peter and Christina whispering about something. I don't try to listen in, the screaming voices in my own head easily drown them out.

"Tris, I'm going to lie down to get some more rest, ok?" Peter asks me.

"Yeah." I reply.

"Hey, can you look at me for a second?" He asks. I turn to face him. "Are you going to be ok?" I shake my head no and feel tears running down my face.

Christina crawls in bed next to me and wraps her arms around me. "I've got her Peter, go ahead and rest." I hear the creaking of Peter's bed frame as he gets comfortable on his bed.

"Talk to me Tris." She says quietly.

"I don't know what to say. Or what to think." I reply.

"He wasn't aware of what he was doing sweetie. He was just as mindless as I was that day."

"It's not the same." I reply.

"How is it not? Tris, am I responsible for knowingly killing the innocent people I did? You've told me over and over I'm not. Were you lying to make me feel better?" She asks.

"No, absolutely not!"

"Then how is it different for him? Tris, I know that the fact that he physically is responsible for your parents deaths is absolutely horrifying, but he had absolutely no idea what he was doing." She replies.

"He had a choice Chris. When we were injected with the serum, they told us it was a tracker. We accepted it as part of being members of Dauntless, especially when it was coming from Max and Harrison. Four chose to defect and go to his mother. Had he tried talking to me about what was going through his head, maybe he wouldn't have gone to her. Him choosing to leave Dauntless, and literally him leaving me in the middle of a war led to his being drugged. He put himself in that situation by trusting a woman who abandoned him."

"You're right, he did make a choice, but Tris it was for his mother. I don't know his life story or anything, but it seems like he didn't have the best parents. Whatever happened to his mother must have been pretty awful for her to fake being dead for so long. You heard him, he said all he wanted was a relationship with her." She replies.

"I don't know what to do." I sigh.

"Tris, do you love Four?" She asks.

"No. I mean, maybe I could have down the road, but something always held me back."

"Do you want him in your life?"

"I don't know." I answer honestly.

"Is this about Eric?" She asks.

"No! Or maybe. No, not really."

"That was unconvincing. Look, I heard that he said some pretty heavy feelings related stuff during his trial, and I've seen a shift in the way you two act together. Is this an issue of Four or Eric? Are you afraid of getting involved with one because of the other?"

"It's not exactly that simple. I have stuff I need to figure out, plus we're in the middle of another war. You know how earlier I told you I was starting to remember things?"

"Yes." She nods.

"I just remembered something about Eric. During the sim, Four and I got separated the first time when I was going to my parents house to look for them. I ran into Eric and this guy named Martin. I pretended to be under the sim, but the Martin guy wasn't convinced, and he pulled a gun on me. Eric distracted him, knocked him out and told me to run. He protected me. He told me he couldn't stay with me yet, but for me to stay away from Four, and he told me Four wasn't who I thought he was. He told me to go to Amity and that he would come find me when it was all over. I don't actually know how I ended up back with Four and Marcus."

"I'm pretty sure that happened Tris. After they rescued you from Jeanine, they were convinced you'd been given some type of memory serum, either by Jeanine herself or by Marcus. Remember in the footage you were shown, Marcus injected something into your neck before picking you up. They did something to you Tris. You have barely any memory of anything related to Erudite, and your memory has been scrambled on things that happened before the sim as well. God, the nightmares for the first few days we had you back in Abnegation were awful. That's why we took turns sleeping in the bed with you. You were the most responsive to Eric though, even then." She replied.

"He's tried to protect me this whole time. I was so blinded by Four. I don't know what is real anymore Chris."

"Ok, I'll say this and leave you to it. You've now finally heard the whole truth from both of them. It's all laid out bare, out in the open. Now you have to decide what to do with their truths. Eric has been nothing but good to you, even if he can be an asshole at times. Four may have been mind controlled, but as you pointed out he made decisions without you that left you to deal with the consequences of his actions. If nothing else, forgive him even if he doesn't deserve your forgiveness because it's going to continue to eat you alive if you don't. Tris, you can try to ignore the fact that both of them said they loved you while under truth serum, you can pretend that none of that matters because there are bigger issues but to do so is lying to yourself and it's going to end up being a huge distraction to you until you address it and deal with it. You're under no obligation to love either of them, but if you do have feelings for either of them just follow your heart. We could literally die tomorrow, we both know this is a chance we take in war. Don't have any regrets."

"You're absolutely right. I need to think about it. Thank you Chris, you are always able to put things into perspective for me. I love you."

"I love you too sweetie. Get some rest, I'll stay right here with you till Eric gets back, ok?"

"Ok."

I wait until she falls asleep, then I carefully crawl out of bed and make my way out of the room. I wander around until I find a Candor resident, and I quietly ask where prisoners are held. I'm told it's in the basement, so I take an elevator down. Once there, I find a locked door with a speaker box mounted next to it. I press the red button on the box and a tired male voice answers.

"What ya need?"

"Um, hi I'm Tris Prior, one of the Dauntless leaders here to see a prisoner of ours, Tobias Eaton."

"I'm gonna buzz ya in."

Once I hear the buzz I'm able to open the heavy door. I'm immediately faced with a small room, with guards behind a thick layer of glass.

"Put your hand on the scanner please." I recognize the male voice from the speaker. "Ok, thanks. I'll escort you back."

He opens another heavy door and gestures for me to come back.

"Names Gavin. We don't get many Dauntless down here. It's my first time meeting a leader." He says.

"Nice to meet you Gavin, I'm Tris. Thank you for the escort." I reply.

"Eaton huh? Surprised he's still here. I heard he did well during his testimony today." He says in an attempt to make conversation.

"We just need to confirm some things before we sentence him." I reply.

We stop in front of a large metal door, with a thick glass window in the middle. "Here we go. You feel comfortable going in there or should I bring you to one of the visitation rooms? He seems pretty harmless."

"You can let me in there." I reply. He scans a keycard and types in a series of numbers on the keypad and we hear the lock open. I open the heavy door and I see Tobias laying on his bunk with his back to the door.

"I'll be right outside, holler if you need me." Gavin replies before stepping out of the cell.

"Tobias?" I call out. He stirs slightly, but I hear him softly snoring again. I walk over to him and nudge his shoulder. He jerks awake and flips over to see me.

"Tris. Are you really here?" He asks in a sleep thickened voice.

"Yeah, I'm here." I reply.

"I'm glad you came. Do you want to sit?" He asks. I shake my head no.

"I'm ok for now." I reply.

He sits up and rubs his face with his hands. His hair is sticking in all directions and he looks exhausted.

"I'm so sorry. I hate myself for doing what I did." He says softly. "I should have never trusted her."

"Why'd you do it?"

"I thought she loved me. She said all the right things, how she was sorry that she left me with him, that she's missed me, that she's proud of me. She told me she left me because I'd have a better chance at life being able to choose my faction rather than living factionless. I believed her. It felt so fucking good to have a parent actually want me. It was all bullshit."

"Why didn't you tell me you were meeting with her?" I ask.

"I wanted to, I just wasn't sure how. At first I kept it secret because I needed to know if I even wanted to pursue having her back in my life. Once I got comfortable with that idea, she had asked me to leave Dauntless and join her. She knew I was unhappy about Max, Harrison and Eric working with Jeanine, and that I was disgusted with the direction that Dauntless was taking as a result. I wanted to leave, but I wanted you with me. I was afraid you wouldn't come with me if I asked."

"How long did you know about the war plan?"

"Karl and I were kept out of the loop as far as the war plans. I only knew what Evelyn would share with me, and what she shared ended up being a lie too." He sighs. "Tris, if I had any idea she was going to use me like she did I wouldn't have ever gone to her."

"Tobias, I understand that she gave you a mind controlling serum and as a result you were unaware of the things you did. What I don't understand is after we got off the train and got to Abnegation you left me, alone, in the middle of a war with mind controlled and armed Dauntless soldiers. Why did you do that?"

"I saw Max and Eric coming towards us, so I thought if I took a different path that I could draw their attention off of you and onto me. It worked because they chose to follow me, and by the time I lost them I couldn't find you." I can feel my tears falling freely down my face. He saw Max and Eric and led them away? How is it I saw Martin and Eric minutes after Tobias left me? He's lying to me.

"I know that I could have very well ended up captured without you, and that my parents could have been hurt without you too. But, I can't get over the fact that your choice to leave Dauntless and me behind set these things in motion, and these things were committed by your own hands. I saw the footage of you beating me unconscious and you and your father taking me to Erudite. I watched that Tobias! I woke up in a house surrounded by people I thought were traitors and all I could do was ask for you! I went to Amity to find my parents only to be told they were dead. Then today, to hear you admit to killing them, you might as well have killed me too." I can feel my entire body shaking with sobs. Tobias stands up and walks towards me, but I hold both hands up. "No, you stay away."

"I hate myself for what I did to you and to your parents. I'll have to live with that guilt for the rest of my life." He replies.

"Is that supposed to make me feel better? You should hate youself and you should feel guilty!" I yell.

"Tris, I should have been there. I'm so sorry. God, please forgive me. Please." He pleads.

"You don't deserve my forgiveness." I cry. Before I can react he has pulled me to him and wrapped me in his arms. I hit him with my fists before grabbing a fist full of his shirt and sobbing into his chest. "You killed them. You did this to me." I sob over and over.

"I'm so sorry. I hate myself for doing this to you." He repeats over and over. "Tris, I love you so damn much. I'm so sorry for leaving you." His grip on me is so tight that I'm afraid he will leave bruises. He holds me as I cry, as I hit him out of anger and as I tell him how much I hate what he did. I cry until I have no more tears. He pulls away from our embrace and wipes my tear soaked face with his hands. He's looking at me with those deep blue eyes that both haunt my dreams and make me melt, and he quickly leans in and crashes his lips to mine. He pulls me as close as physically possible to him while kissing me with a passion he's never exhibited before. My mind is screaming for me to get away from him, but my body begins to betray me, and for a few stolen moments I find myself kissing him back. I feel the stubble from his beard, his hands wrapping around my back and then trailing down to pick me up by the back of my thighs. He lays me down on his mattress, holding me there with his own body weight. He trails kisses down my jaw and to my neck. Tobias has always been careful and gentle with me, he's never shown this type of dominance or aggression. This isn't right. He isn't who I want. I quickly push him away and he leans over me.

"No, you don't get to do that." I say.

"You love me Tris. I can feel it when we kiss. I felt it every time we made love." He replies, leaning back in to kiss me.

"Stop, get off of me. Let me get up. I don't want you." I reply, looking him straight in the eye.

"You don't mean that Tris." He says softly, before moving off of me. I immediately get up from his mattress.

"You know nothing about me." I reply.

"I know everything about you Tris. Everything." He says evenly, and I feel doubt creeping into my mind.

"What do you mean?" I ask.

He sighs heavily before speaking again. "I'm sorry for everything Tris, is there any way you'd ever forgive me? Is there any way we can be together?"

"I can't be with you. I don't know if I can ever forgive you. I need to go." I turn to walk towards the door and when Tobias speaks again it makes me stop in my tracks.

"Are you fucking him?" He asks coldly.

I turn back to look at him and his expression is hard. He's now standing in front of his bed. His body language is threatening and I immediately feel extremely uncomfortable with him.

"How long did you know that Eric wasn't actually working with Jeanine?" I counter.

He scoffs. "Is that what he told you? You actually believe that?"

"You know he is who rescued me. He tried to warn me about you before the attack. He also warned me about you during the attack, and he did so as he helped me to elude capture, so my question remains, how long did you know that he wasn't working for Jeanine?"

"You believe everything he tells you, huh?" He retorts.

"He helped me, in Abnegation. He saved me from a man who had a gun pointed at my head." I reply angrily.

"How do you even know that really happened?" He asks.

"Because I remember it." I reply. There is shock evident on his face, but he quickly masks it. He didn't expect me to remember anything.

"Tell me Tris, what is it you think you're getting from him besides his dick? You think he actually cares about you?"

"And you do? You cared so much for me that you fucking left me. Either answer my question or I'm leaving this cell." I reply. He glares at me, saying nothing. "Not answering the question is answer enough for me."

"Tris, wait. I just want you to know that I regret leaving you in Abnegation. I should have stayed by your side. I should have protected you. I do love you Tris." Although he's looking at me with those deep blue eyes that make me weak, something inside me suddenly clicks. I now know without a shadow of a doubt that he's been lying to me.

"I need to get out of here." I move towards the cell door.

"Wait, please. Why does it matter how long I knew?" He asks.

"Because he's the only one who tried to save me from you." I answer.

"You heard my testimony, you know I had no control over what I did. How could be possibly have saved you from me? I was still me, up until I was injected. I'm still me now. Tris, you have to see that. You trusted me before this, you can trust me again. I'm still the same person, please see that." He pleads.

"I have to go." I bang on the door and shout for Gavin. He quickly comes and opens the door.

Tobias reaches for my arms and pulls me towards him, Gavin draws his weapon.

"Take your hands off of her." Gavin says. Tobias removes his hands from my arms.

"Tris, please don't leave me. Please don't give up on us. You're still mine, and I'm yours."

"You left me, and you gave up on me. You did both of those things when you decided to put your trust into that woman. In case you needed clarification, we are done. I don't love you, and I don't want to be with you." I reply as I walk out of the door.

I leave the basement and head back to our room, replaying the conversation with Tobias in my mind. I wander aimlessly until I find the corridor with our room, and I prepare myself to deal with the onslaught of questions my unexplained absence will bring. I open the door and find the room to be empty. I check Zeke and Tori's rooms and they are empty as well. A bubble of panic settles into my stomach. I check the communal bathroom and no one is there either. As I'm walking back down the hall towards my room, I see Eric rushing towards me.


	6. Chapter 6

Tris POV

"Jesus Christ Tris, I've been looking everywhere for you, where have you been?" Eric asks. "We were worried. I was worried. Are you ok?"

"You told me to run in Abnegation. There was a man there, you called him Martin. He had a gun to my head, and you knocked him out and you told me to run. You told me that Four wasn't who I thought he was. You had your hands on my face. Did that happen?" I ask, my words running together.

"Slow down, did someone tell you that?" He asks.

"No, I remembered it, at least I think it's a memory. Did it happen? Tell me please. I can't tell if I'm having dreams or memories sometime."

"Yes, that happened. What else do you remember?" He asks.

"Not a lot, just bits and pieces so far. Sometimes the lines between memories and dreams are very blurry."

"It's good that you're starting to remember things. I want you to know you can talk to me about these things." He replies.

"Even if it's not something you'd particularly want to hear?" I ask.

He looks at me with an almost quizzical expression. I realize this must be the former Erudite in him, the extreme curiosity is one of their most prominent personality traits.

"Even if you think I don't want to hear it. I want to hear all of it, I mean it." He replies.

"Why didn't you ever tell me that you thought I was given memory serum?" I ask.

He sighs and appears a bit uncomfortable. "Who told you that?" He asks.

"It doesn't matter who told me, it wasn't said to me in malice. Can you please answer me?" I ask.

"We aren't sure what happened. You can see Marcus inject something in your neck from the surveillance footage, but Caleb isn't familiar with a memory serum that would only erase certain memories. The serum that Erudite uses is a full wipe." He replies.

"Is it possible that I was given a partial dosage? Or that my body expelled the serum before it could work properly?" I ask.

"These are things we can ask Caleb. He's much more familiar with the serums and how they work." He replies. He tucks some loose strands of my hair behind my ears, letting his hands linger on my face and tilts my head so he can look in my eyes. "Tris, where were you? Chris said she woke up and you were gone. I've been looking everywhere for you. Where have you been?" He's speaking to me in a soft voice, but I can tell he's struggling to keep calm.

"I didn't mean to worry you. Where is everyone?"

"Marlene, Uriah, Caleb and Edward are here, they're waiting in the conference room for us. Tris, where did you go?" He asks.

"I went for a walk." I reply, I can see Eric's jaw tense.

"It was more than a walk, wasn't it?" He asks in an even voice.

"Yes." I reply, he brings his hand to his face and massages the bridge of his nose with his thumb and index finger. He takes a deep breath, holding it before releasing it.

"We need to go, but I need to know are you ok?" He asks.

"Yes." I reply.

"We will talk about this later." He says training his grey eyes on mine before turning to walk away. I reach out for him and pull him towards me, wrapping my arms around his waist and burying my face into his shoulder. At first, he tenses, but he quickly recovers and wraps his arms around my back and leans his head on mine.

"I'm sorry. Please don't be angry with me, I can't take it right now." I say, my voice muffled by his shoulder. I can feel him nod.

"I know. I don't want to be angry with you. We'll talk about it, right?" I nod against him. "We have to get to the conference room." He says and we pull apart from each other. I grab for his hand and we lace our fingers together as I let him lead us to the meeting. We walk into the room and Eric makes no attempt to separate our hands, instead he leads me to some free chairs and we sit without breaking our contact.

"Ok, sorry about the delay. Edward, please fill us in." Eric says quickly.

"Right. Evelyn is off her game. Marcus is still missing, and Four left sometime last night without any warning."

"Four is here. He's being held in the jail here." Zeke says.

"What? How?" Edward asks.

"He showed up at Amity looking for refuge last night. Johanna sent him here to clear his name. Jack put him under truth serum today and he testified that he was under a mind control serum that Evelyn gave him. We've ordered some testing to see if he received the serum, but it's really just to buy us some time. Based on his testimony under the truth serum, we don't have any reason to hold him, and the only punishment we've been able to enforce is stripping his leadership status." Eric replies.

"No. Absolutely not. Do not let him out of that cell." Edward says, his voice raising. He stands up and begins pacing. "Four was given the serum, but he's serum resistant. Evelyn knows it and so does Four. Jeanine tested it on him over a month ago. He's resistant to almost every serum Jeanine had, including the truth serum. He's lying to you. There were records of all of his testing, but I know for a fact that Jeanine never used his real name. Evelyn has copies of all the records and I can try to get those from her."

"Edward is right, and it might not be necessary to get the records from Evelyn. I worked on his records, well at the time I had no idea they were his. His name wasn't used in the testing records that Jeanine kept, but he was identified as test subject 11. I was told that test subject 11 was a Dauntless leader, but I had always assumed it was Max. It has to be Four, because what Edward is telling us matches those test records. The only serums that weren't tested on him were the memory wipe and death serums." Caleb says.

"Are you absolutely sure he's serum resistant? Without a shadow of a doubt." I ask.

"Yes, one hundred percent sure. I was there for the planning session, Evelyn knew that Four would need to be put under truth serum to be able to return to Dauntless. She had him tested numerous times to ensure he could easily beat the serum. They practiced for that very moment." Edward replies.

"This makes no sense. He testified today, he admitted to killing people and to turning Tris over to Jeanine. Why would he do all of this? What would he have to gain by admitting to those atrocities?" Tori asks.

"Your trust. To get back into Dauntless. Evelyn had always planned on sending him back, but I was told that plan was delayed due to Marcus being missing. Even Edgar thought the plan was called off. My guess is Four decided to go anyway, or that Evelyn changed her mind." Edward replies.

"Fuck!" Eric yells, slamming his hand onto the table. "We almost played right into her hand!"

"Hey, your delaying of his sentencing for medical testing was smart. It bought us enough time to get this intel from Edward. We can still work with this, if we're smart about it." Tori replies. I can feel myself tuning the conversations in the room out.

 ** _Flashback_**

 _"Tris, he was going to be factionless, he was never going to pass that final test." Four says to me, trying to calm me after Al's suicide._

 _"Neither am I." I reply._

 _"Why do you say that?" He asks, evenly._

 _"You know why." I answer quietly and he nods. " And once the others find out they're gonna kill me."_

 _"I'm not gonna let that happen Tris." He replies._

 _"So, you've known this whole time?" I ask._

 _"Suspected it, yes. I only knew for sure once you were in your fear landscape."_

 _"How are you going to protect me? Do you know why they want me dead? Who's after me?" I ask._

 _"Eric is working for Jeanine Matthews, he's hunting divergents. Tris, if he finds out about you you're as good as dead. I'm not going to let him hurt you. You have to stay away from him at all costs."_

 _"How can I stay away from him? He's one of our instructors, and a leader." I reply._

 _"Tris, you need to trust me. I'm going to protect you, and I can help you to avoid being detected, but you have to promise that you'll stay away from him."_

 _"Ok." I reply. "How are you going to help me?" I ask._

 _"Do you trust me?" He asks, staring into my eyes._

 _"With my life apparently." I reply, and for the first time since we've met I see his lips turn up into a true smile._

 _ **End Flashback**_

"I have to get out of here." I stand up suddenly and walk out of the room. I hear Eric calling for a quick break and asking Caleb to come with him. I walk out of the room and look for some place to go. I feel a hand in mine and I hear Eric calling my name.

"Hey, we're going to the roof ok?" He says quietly. I nod, and Caleb follows behind us. Once we're on the roof, I slide down a wall and sit down. Eric and Caleb soon sit with me.

"Bea, what's wrong? Is it seeing Four again? Is it what we said about him being serum resistant?" Caleb asks, his brows furrowed in concern.

"Caleb, he..." I try to talk but a sob escapes and I feel the tears start pouring. Eric wraps his arms around me and I cry into his chest.

"Caleb, your sister and I found out that your parents were killed during the attack on Abnegation. I'm so sorry." Eric says.

"How?" Caleb asks, his voice breaking.

"Four admitted to killing them. He claimed to be under the influence of the mind controlling serum, but we now know based on what Edward just told us that he was lying about being affected by the serum."

"He knew what he was doing. He killed our parents on purpose." I cry. Caleb reaches for my hand and squeezes it hard.

"We will make him pay." Caleb quietly says. I look up at him and he has tears streaming down his cheeks, but his expression is calm.

"We can execute him." Eric replies. "Dauntless was given full jurisdiction.

"Or, we could use him." Caleb counters. Eric's face reflects the same shock I'm feeling.

"I'm listening." Eric says.

"He has no idea we're on to him. We can tell him that he's going to be our mole. We feed him full of false information, and he takes that intel to Evelyn. She bases her entire plan on our false intel. Of course we'd need a plan, but that's the gist of my suggestion."

"That could work." I quietly reply.

"Yes, it could. I'm concerned about how having him here, and interacting with him as if nothing is wrong will affect the two of you." Eric replies.

"I can deal with him if it means taking Evelyn down." Caleb says resolutely.

"I saw him a little while ago and based on our discussion I'm sure he doesn't expect me to be welcoming to him." I reply.

I can feel Eric's eyes burning into me, but I refuse to look up at him.

"We should go inside to discuss this with the others. I'll give you two some privacy, just come in whenever you're ready." Eric replies. He stands up and then extends his hand to help me up. He looks at me questioningly then presses a kiss to my forehead before walking back into the building.

"Come here." Caleb says, holding his arms out. I wrap myself in his embrace. "We're all we have left. Promise me you'll stay safe Bea."

"I will, you promise the same."

"I will. I can't believe they're gone." He sighs.

"I just hope they didn't suffer." I reply.

"I hope they didn't die thinking I was a traitor." Caleb quietly says.

"I'm sure they didn't think that. Our parents were very perceptive. They wouldn't have believed you were capable of turning against them or me."

"You thought I did." He replies.

"I didn't really believe it. I was confused, I had faint memories of you and Peter working at Erudite. When I saw Eric, I thought the worst. You have to understand, I'd been told about his secret meetings with Jeanine, and I'd also been heavily influenced by Tobias' hatred of him. Caleb, I spent my entire time in Dauntless trusting the real enemy. If I hadn't of gotten involved with him, our parents may have lived."

"No they wouldn't have. They were targets, everyone on the council was. It's not your fault Bea. It's Jeanine Matthew's fault. She started this whole war."

"I'm glad she's dead." I reply.

"I am too. I wish I could have been the one that killed her." He whispers. I feel Caleb sigh. We just stand together for several minutes. This is what war does, it changes people. My brilliant brother chose Erudite to enrich his curiosity and quench his thirst for knowledge, but he's been changed into a war strategist with a thirst for blood.

What will this war turn me in to?

Will I let it?

"Let's go make plans." Caleb finally says. He leads me back inside to the conference room.

 **Eric** **POV**

"Tris and Caleb need some time to process their parents death." I say when returning to our meeting.

"What happened with her? We can't have her being unstable like that while being involved in these plans." Edward remarks.

"Edward, she just found out that her ex boyfriend not only knowingly turned her in to Jeanine Matthews, but also knowingly ordered you to murder her and knowingly murdered her parents. She's going through the ringer with this. She'll be fine, she just needs a little bit of time to process everything she's learned today. Does anyone else have a concern about Tris' ability to lead Dauntless or participate in these meetings?" I ask.

"Eric, you know I care a great deal about Tris, and this is meant as no disrespect towards you, but are you really able to have an unbiased opinion on her considering your involvement with her?" Tori asks.

"Yes, I absolutely can. I wouldn't put anyone in jeopardy if I questioned the stability and judgement of one of our team members, regardless of what our involvement is. She's been dealing with a lot since this war started, but she's strong as hell. I really don't appreciate your questioning of my judgement." I reply.

"I'll second that." Will replies. "Everyone is entitled to a bad day. Today is that for Tris. She will bounce back, she always does."

"I'm sorry, like I said I don't mean any disrespect, I just needed to be sure. Thank you for addressing my concern." Tori replies.

"What are we doing with Four?" Shauna asks.

"Caleb had a suggestion, but it concerns me." I reply. "He suggested that we not let Four know that we're on to him, but instead make him believe we're accepting him back into Dauntless. We give him false information, and let him take that false intel to Evelyn."

"I think that's a pretty good idea, what are your concerns with it?" Uriah asks.

"Evelyn thought several of us were dead. Now Four knows we aren't. Edward reported he had killed Tris, Peter, Caleb and me. How do we protect Edward?" I reply.

"Easy. I covered for myself when I told them how I killed you. I told him I had left a bomb in a building and lured you all into it. When they asked if I confirmed your deaths I told them there was no way you could have survived the blast. It's easy enough to convince them you all must have escaped somehow before the bomb went off." Edward replies.

"We need to make sure that Four has no idea that Edward is working with us." Marlene says. "We can't chance that they run into each other here or at the Dauntless compound."

"If Four did happen to run into Edward, he'd also compromise himself. However, I agree that we need to be careful and aware." Will says.

"My other concern is Four specifically asked for Tris to be killed. Edward, do you know why?" I ask.

"It was personal with Four. Evelyn was actually pleased that your efforts to save Tris ultimately caused the death of both Jeanine and Max, which essentially paved the way for Evelyn and Marcus to put their own plan into motion. Evelyn wants Tris alive, she feels she's much more valuable that way." Edward replies.

"So, it's quite possible that his personal vendetta could still be in place and that her life could be in danger if we decide to move forward with this plan. Not only that, but Evelyn viewing Tris as valuable is even more dangerous." I reply.

"Eric, there are hundreds of us and only one of him. She'll be safe with us. As far as Evelyn is concerned we're going to have that covered too. No one is gonna touch Tris." Zeke replies.

"So we'd essentially be sending Four in as our mole? So Four will think his plan to infiltrate us was a success? And when we interact with him, we treat him like anyone else, except we only share false information?" Christina asks.

"Exactly. However, we'd need to be sure that we are all on the same page with our false information. We need to plan out what we're going to give him, and all be aware of the information. We're going to have to have meetings like these, except with him involved." Tori replies. "Will Tris and Caleb be able to do that?"

"Yes, we will." Caleb answers while walking back into the room.

"Tris, what about you?" Tori asks.

"I saw Four right before this meeting, that's why I was late. I made it clear to him during our conversation that I didn't forgive him and that our relationship was over. So, I believe that any distaste I exhibit with him or around him shouldn't raise his suspicions." Tris replies.

"Fair enough. How long should we keep him sitting?" Shauna asks.

"Long enough for the blood tests to come back at least. He's expecting that of us." I reply.

"What if he runs?" Marlene asks.

"If he runs, we shoot to kill when we catch up with him." I reply. "Since his sole purpose was to get back into Dauntless to spy on us, I doubt he'll run, but if he does we eliminate him."

"How organized is Evelyn's group?" Tori asks Edward.

"It's a bit chaotic. Marcus has been missing, he's presumed dead but no one has been able to confirm it. Most of Jeanine's followers were loyal to Marcus but they are wary of Evelyn. They have the manpower if they could get on the same page, but they are severely lacking in weaponry. The best weapon Evelyn has are the serums, and she's tasked the remaining Erudite who are loyal to her cause with increasing the serum supply. Right now, she doesn't have enough serum for a physical fight, but her focus has shifted somewhat towards a way to mass distribute the memory serum without it wiping everyone."

"How close is she to doing that?" I ask.

"Not close at all. They'd need a way to inoculate themselves against it if they were going to release it as an airborne weapon. We need to take out the Erudite labs and computer systems, along with the serums they have in that building. That should be our main focus." Edward replies.

"How much serum does Evelyn have on hand?" Tris asks.

"Quite a bit, but a mixed bag. Some of the long range mind control, but she's lacking the proper computer software to use it, she has a surprisingly large amount of the Dauntless fear landscape serum, she has a decent amount of memory serum but she also has death serum. Not enough for mass casualties, but enough to take out a room full of people if she could release it as airborne. From what I've seen, she doesn't have enough of any one serum to wage a war, but if Erudite comes through with getting what she needs for the memory serum that's what she will do. Four was part of that planning session, he's fully aware of her plans." He replies.

"We need to attack Erudite." Will says. "There are enough of us familiar with the inner workings of that building to be able to destroy the labs."

"Destroying the labs won't destroy the knowledge." Tris says. "When we attack, we need to be ready to do both. I suggest we use their own weapon against them. We memory wipe the Erudite loyals and use them to help us attack Evelyn. The more of her own troops that we can turn against her, the better."

"That's an excellent idea." I reply. I can tell the others in the room are as equally impressed with Tris.

"One more thing, I also suggest we attempt to memory wipe Four without his knowledge. We know he's proven to be serum resistant, so if he sees us inject the serum he'd play his part, but we also know the memory serum was never tested on him. If we could wipe his memory when the time is right he'd be invaluable to fight for our cause. We can continue with our plan to use him to misinform Evelyn, but when it comes time for us to attack we could use him as our soldier. No one can get closer to Evelyn than he can. We could use him as a way to ensure her capture, or death. Right now, he is her biggest weakness." Tris adds.

"I agree with Bea. That is a great idea." Caleb replies, showing sincere adoration for his sister.

"I agree." Tori replies. "He could become our very own attack dog."

"I can't argue with her logic." Zeke adds.

"What if the memory wipe doesn't work on him?" Christina asks.

"Then we execute him once he's served his purpose." Tris replies resolutely.

"So, let me get this straight. Our actual plan is to allow Four to believe he's been reinstated as a trusted member of Dauntless, feed him false info and send him to Evelyn, while we execute an attack on Erudite to destroy their labs and memory wipe the people working in them?" Shauna asks.

"Exactly. And our false plans are to lead Evelyn to think our attack focus is on her, so while the factionless are prepping to defend their headquarters our focus can be totally on Erudite." I reply. "I want everyone in this room to vote. By a show of hands, all in favor?" I look around the room and everyone's hand is raised. "It's settled. Our next move is heavily dependent on what our scouts find at the Dauntless compound."

"We need weapons." Peter says.

"Precisely. We're either going to be able to get them the easy way - which is if it's determined safe to move back there, or the hard way." I reply.

"We sneak in." Uriah replies with a huge grin. "Definitely not the easy way, but it could be so damn fun."

"Talk about timing. I just got a message from Lynn. Dauntless is safe." I say as everyone cheers. "Obviously the communications there are working since she was able to reach out. She said there are at least 200 loyal Dauntless there, and they've been living without issue since Jeanine was killed. So now our next move is to get everyone home."

"That's the best possible news we could have gotten." Marlene replies.

"How do we go about getting everyone back to Dauntless?" Peter asks.

"We have about five to six hundred Dauntless here, I think we should make the move in three separate groups." Tori replies. "Start with one group tonight, and one in the morning, then the last tomorrow night."

"That sounds like the most logical way to move." Caleb replies.

"The factionless are most active during the middle of the day. So Tori's suggestion is spot on for bringing the least amount of attention to what you're doing." Edward replies.

"Edward, we need to get you back to Evelyn before we send Four out, and we'll plan to get him back to Evelyn before the last group leaves for Dauntless tomorrow evening. Unless there is a dire emergency, I need you to stay with Evelyn until after Four returns, and stick close to the two of them to ensure she trusts him." I say.

"I'll plan on rejoining with Evelyn early tomorrow morning, she sent me out for surveillance so I'm not expected back until then." He replies.

"Shauna and I will organize the first group to head back to Dauntless tonight if you'd like." Zeke offers.

"I like that idea. I don't want all of leadership or this core team in the same group, just in case of an ambush. Zeke and Shauna go with the first group, take Christina and Will with you. Tori with the morning group, with Peter, Marlene and Uriah and for the last group it'll be Caleb, Tris and me. Will this work for everyone?"

"It sounds good to me." Tris replies.

"I like it." Tori replies.

"Zeke and I will actually get all three groups set and briefed on the plans after this meeting, that way the rest of you can try to relax a bit." Shauna offers.

"Thank you guys, that would be great if you're sure you don't mind." Tori replies.

"Not at all, with my big mouth it'll be easy." Zeke replies.

"If a big mouth is needed, count me in too." Uriah offers.

"Ok, it's settled. Rest while you can, enjoy life while you can, soon we will be starting our own war. Dismissed." I announce.


	7. Chapter 7

**Thanks again for all of your reviews. Sorry for leaving you all hanging with "the talk" last chapter, it just was too much to combine into one chapter. As a reminder, I don't own these characters, just my own ideas.**

Eric POV

After adjourning the meeting I see Tris hanging back, looking out of the large window of the conference room. I sit on the table and face the window. Once everyone has filed out of the room, I decide to ask her about her visit with Four.

"Tris, we should talk." I start.

"I know." She sighs.

"Why didn't you tell me you were going to see him?" I ask.

"Straight to the point, huh?" She replies with a hint of anger in her voice.

"Would you like to discuss the weather instead? Or what's so fucking interesting outside that window? Do tell me, Tris."

"Fuck you Eric." She spits, then starts walking towards the door.

I jump down from my seat on the table and grab her arm. She tries to pull away but I tighten my grip.

"Tris, stop. I don't want to fight with you, just talk. Can we try this again?" I ask. She doesn't answer, but also makes no move to walk away. "Why didn't you tell me you were going to him?"

"You weren't there when I decided to do it." She replies without looking at me. "Besides, I wasn't aware that I needed permission." I drop her arm and walk towards the table.

"I didn't say anything about needing permission. Going to see him was dangerous and reckless. No one knew where you were, and what if something happened?"

"He didn't hurt me, physically at least. I'm fine." She replies.

"You are the furthest thing from fine right now." I reply.

She turns around suddenly and faces me, anger evident in her expression. "How would you know Eric? All you do is fuck me to distract me. What do you even know about how I'm feeling?"

I close my eyes and take a deep breath, willing myself to calm down before answering.

"That's a great question, considering you won't talk to me about how you're feeling. You keep telling me how I need to open up and let you in and all of this other bullshit and yet you shut me out."

"I don't have to answer to you." She replies coldly before turning her back to me.

"I never said you do. I just want to keep you safe." I reply, keeping my temper in check. Tris is looking for a fight and I refuse to give it to her.

"What am I to you? A problem to solve? A project to fix? That's what I was to him. That's what I seem to be to everyone." She starts pacing in front of the window, but still refuses to look at me. "I'm one person, but a whole lot of fucking trouble to everyone who gets too close to me. I don't need you to keep me safe. I can take care of myself."

"What the fuck Tris? What did he do to you today?" I ask, and she finally turns around and faces me.

"Really? You're asking me that? He turned me in to Jeanine, knowing they would torture me and kill me. He killed my parents, then lied to me about it. I went to see him to get answers and he still lied to me. He told me how sorry he is, and how he wouldn't have ever hurt me had he been in control of his mind, and he'd never have killed anyone and how much he loves me. He held me, he fucking kissed me, and after all of that he still looked me in the eyes and lied to me. I knew he was lying. I don't know how I figured it out, but I fucking knew he was lying!" She yells.

I can practically feel my body vibrating from anger. She willingly put herself in a situation where she could have been hurt, or worse, and now I have to hear about them kissing. I can't figure out what's going through her mind any more than she can at this point.

"I wish I knew what to say. I don't know what you're going through as far as your feelings for him, but I do know what you're going through with losing your parents. You don't have to deal with these things alone Tris."

"I don't have feelings for him. He said that he loves me but I've never said that back to him. Even before I knew what he was I never felt that way for him." She replies with tears in her eyes. She turns away and looks out the window again. "I guess I don't do feelings either, kind of like you right Eric?"

"You trusted him and he betrayed your trust. Even if you didn't love him yet, you shared things with him so I know it's hard to deal with knowing what he's done to you. You have every right to be angry, but not at me. I'm here though, so if this is what needs to happen for you to heal then be angry at me, yell, scream do whatever you need." I reply.

"Why aren't you angry with me?" She asks defiantly.

"I am angry with you, but you asked me to stop pushing you away. I'm trying here, you have to at least be willing to meet me half way." I reply, keeping my voice calm.

She doesn't say anything, instead she just continues to look out the window. There's nothing but silence and tension in the room, and I've had enough at this point. Just as I'm about to stand up, she starts speaking to me.

"I didn't want him to kiss me. I did react though. For a brief second I kissed him back, my mind was screaming at me to stop but my body betrayed me. I didn't want him though." She says quietly.

"Why are you telling me this?" I ask.

"Because I thought you'd appreciate the honesty, even if it's after the fact." She replies.

"I do. Though, maybe next time we can talk about things before they happen? Like before visiting a prisoner without telling anyone where you're going." I snap, regretting my tone immediately.

"Ok, I was wrong, it was stupid of me to go, I was an idiot for being alone with him. I already know this Eric. I know it was stupid and reckless. I've lost everything and I didn't fucking care if he hurt me. If he killed me oh well. Is that what you want to hear? Fuck!" She yells, banging her hands on the window. "I'm sick of this back and forth with you. I'm not going to be controlled again by someone who pretends to care about me."

I stand up and walk over to her, pulling her so she's facing me. She balls up her fists and hits my chest and I grab her arms to stop her. She looks at me briefly before dropping her head down against me.

"I don't care about who's right and who's wrong. I care about your safety and well being. I care about you, I'm not pretending." I'm still holding on to her forearms and she still has her hands balled into fists against my chest. I let go of her arms and gently stroke her back. She grabs onto the front of my shirt, pulls me down and kisses me roughly. She pushes me back on the table and straddles me, kissing my neck and jawline. Her kisses are rough and demanding, she wants to be in control of something right now and at this moment for her its controlling me. When I feel her reaching for my belt and I grab her hands to stop her.

"Tris, we can't. We need to finish this discussion. No more distractions." I feel her shoulders start to shake, so I sit up so we're face to face. I lift her face under her chin and make her look at me, she's crying and refuses to open her eyes. "Tris, it's ok. Please look at me." I start to wipe her tears with my fingers. She finally opens her eyes. "I want you, but not just as a distraction. I'm here, and I meant what I said earlier, you can scream, yell, cry, hit me, whatever but I'm here. I'm not going to lie to you, and I'm not going to leave you. I'm right here."

We stay like this for several minutes, me sitting on the table with her straddling my lap. I just hold her until she stops crying. She finally pulls away slightly and looks at me.

"I'm sorry for not talking to you before I went to see him." She whispers.

"I'm sorry for letting you think that I didn't care. You have to know that is the furthest thing from the truth." I cradle her cheeks in my hands, and tilt her head up so I can kiss her.

"Aren't you afraid of starting this before we go into a war?" She asks.

"I'm afraid of every part of this." I reply honestly. "I'm also afraid of not taking a chance. I have no fucking idea what I'm doing."

"Have you ever been in a relationship?" She asks.

"No." I reply honestly.

"Have you been with many women?" She quietly asks.

"A few."

"Did you love any of them?" She's looking into my eyes for any reaction to this question.

"Sex doesn't equate to love, so no I never loved any of the women I've been with previously." I reply. "Do you want to be with me Tris? Do you want a relationship?" I ask.

I try to read the expression on her face but it's impossible. As Dauntless as she is, I struggle to remember she's also Abnegation as well. As ok as I've been in my past with no strings attached sex, that concept is something that is foreign to Tris, and I realize at this moment how close I am to losing whatever it is that we have started. There are so many words I want to say, but every time I open my mouth they die on my tongue.

"I think we should talk about what you said under the truth serum." She finally says.

"Are you really ready to talk about that, Tris? I thought we agreed to wait." I reply.

Tris says nothing, and for awhile we just sit waiting for the other to break the silence. I push her hair out of her face, tucking the loose strands behind her ears. I cup her face in my hands and lean in to gently kiss her, trying as best as I can to physically communicate how I'm feeling in this very moment.

Tris breaks the kiss and finally answers. "Eric, I'm scared. I'm afraid of losing you in one way or another, whether it be because you realize that I'm not what you want, or if something happens during this war. We've lost so much already."

She's right about one thing, we have lost so damn much. When I look at her, I see hope. I'm worried that when she looks at me she only sees a reminder of exactly what she has lost. I finally decide to be as honest as I can, fuck the consequences.

"Neither of us know what the hell we're doing with relationships and feelings and I don't care. I don't care that the world around us might be falling apart. We will figure it out, together. I'm fucking terrified because of what I said under the truth serum. I've never said those words to anyone outside of my family. I've never even thought I was capable of feeling these things. Fuck Tris, I don't know how to deal with feelings. All I know is you're the only thing I'm sure about. I want to be around you, I want to touch you in some way, I think about you constantly and I have since the first day I saw you. Whatever this is, I want more. You told me you wanted me to be open to the concept of someone actually caring about me, and that's what I'm doing right now. I want you."

"I want you too. I want you so much it scares me." she whispers. I capture her lips with mine, slowly kissing her. She licks my lip for entrance and our tongues dance together. I can feel heat running through my veins and desire starts taking over. This isn't a distraction, this isn't just animalistic lust and need, she wants me physically and emotionally as much as I want her right now.

"Tris, let's get out of here." I whisper against her neck. I feel her nod and she slides off of my lap. I jump off the table and walk towards the double doors. As I'm reaching for the handle I notice the doors have locks, so I turn the locks on each and then spin to face Tris and pick her up. I need her right now, I need to feel her skin and warmth. She wraps her legs around my waist and I push her up against the wall. I kiss her jawline, up to her ears and down her neck. She quickly unbuckles my pants and starts pushing them down. I set her down and quickly pull her jeans and underwear down and she's sliding my boxers down my legs. I pick her up again and hold her against the wall while I slowly enter her. Our kisses grow frantic as our hips work against each other. Tris takes my bottom lip in her mouth, sucking hard on my piercing.

"Eric, I want you to give it to me hard. Show me how much you want me." She growls. I roughly grab her wrists and pin them above her head with one hand while I pound into her. I abruptly change our pace, pulling almost all the way out of her and them slamming hard back into her.

"You feel amazing around my cock." I hungrily kiss her while keeping our slow pounding pace. She whimpers each time I slam into her. "You like it rough?"

"Mmmhmmm." She moans.

"Tell. Me. What. You. Want. Tris." I say, pounding into her with each word I speak.

"Faster." She moans. "Harder, I want you to fuck me."

I pull completely out of her and she whines at the loss. "Bend over that table Tris." I command. She moves to the table and bends forward, I quickly enter her from behind and she lets out a deep moan. I pump in and out of her slowly with short thrusts. "You still want it fast? I whisper.

"Yes." She answers breathily. I slam into her and start pounding her as hard and fast as I can. "Oh fuck Eric." She moans.

"Touch yourself." I whisper. She reaches down and starts rubbing her clit while I watch my cock disappear over and over into her body. "You are so fucking hot." She is moaning lowly and I can feel her walls start to pulse around me.

"Cum with me Eric." She moans. I grip her hips and pull her slightly upward, hitting a spot that makes her very responsive. I can feel my orgasm quickly building and suddenly her walls are tightly gripping me as she falls apart. I thrust into her hard and spill inside of her as I bite down on her back. I keep thrusting as we both ride out our orgasms. I run my hands up and down her sides as I catch my breath, and then slowly pull out of her.

I pull her underwear and jeans back up before I do the same for myself. She buttons her jeans and turns to face me. I cup my hand on the side of her neck, pull her face towards me and gently kiss her swollen lips. I place my other hand on the small of her back and pull her closer to me. I run my hand through her hair while peppering kisses under her jaw.

"Sometimes you're so gentle." She whispers.

"Sometimes you need gentle." I reply. "Lets go back to our room."

Tris unlocks the doors and grabs my hand. I follow her down to our room, which is thankfully empty. We quickly rid each other of our clothes before crawling into our bed. I waste no time in lowering myself between her legs and running my tongue through her wet folds. I concentrate on her clit, teasing it with flicks of my tongue before taking it gently between my teeth. Tris has her hands roughly in my hair, pushing my face closer to her body. The sliver of light that shines from the corridor under our closed door allows just enough illumination for me to see her perfect body writhing below me in anticipation.

"Patience." I growl.

"Everytime I get close you stop." She whines and I chuckle before suddenly moving off of her. "You're leaving?" She whimpers.

"Never." I reply before quickly thrusting inside of her. She moans loudly in response. I move slowly against her, spending time exploring her body with my hands and mouth. I kiss her deeply before tipping her chin up so I can explore her neck. I run my tongue down her jaw, and in between her breasts before taking one of her hardened nipples into my mouth. I put my weight on one hand, trailing my free hand down to gently caress her face. I move my hand down to her breast, running my fingertip across her nipple before gently rolling it my fingers. I'm keeping a slow pace, pulling almost completely out with every thrust. She grinds her hips against me in an effort to speed up the pace but I keep my weight on her to slow her down. She wraps her legs around me to try to pull me closer.

"Eric fuck me, please." She whispers.

As much as I enjoy a good hard fuck, especially with Tris, that isn't what I want from her at this exact moment and she needs to know it. She's no longer a distraction, she's someone I want by my side once everything is said and done and we can live normal lives again. I need her to know this isn't something I'm doing just to fill some time. Admitting these things to myself is hard enough, I don't know how I will ever be able to admit them to her. I can't find a way to say those three words that slipped out during my testimony and even if I could I don't think she's ready to hear them, but I can show her starting right now.

"No Tris, I don't want to fuck you." I reply while working my mouth back up to her neck and ears. "I want to make love to you." She lifts her head off the pillow and stares into my eyes, trying to determine if I meant the words I just said. "Do you want me to make love to you Tris?" I ask.

She whispers "Yes", her voice breaking with her response. She then kisses me, parting her lips so I can gently caress her tongue with mine. I lean down, resting my elbows on either side of her head so we can continue kissing while we meet each other thrust for thrust. Her moans are getting louder as the friction of our bodies moving in sync is bringing her over the edge.

"Cum for me baby." I whisper. Her hip movements get erratic as she arches into me and deepens our kiss while riding out her orgasm. I sit back on my knees and pull her up slightly so we can both watch where our bodies connect. "Look at us Tris. You were made just for me." I whisper.

"Oh Eric..." She moans as she watches me plunge into her. At this moment, I truly don't care about my past. I don't care that I am going to be responsible for waging a war. Right now, I just care about her, the first woman to see past my outward persona and see me for who I am. She's not afraid to call me on my bullshit or stand up to me. The idea of being with me might scare the hell out of her, but she's not afraid of me.

I have one hand supporting my own weight, and the other hand running through her hair, down her neck and around her jaw. I can feel her body reacting to my touch.

As we continue to watch our bodies connecting I feel my own orgasm building and I tip her chin so we're looking into each other's eyes as I cum, calling her name softly over and over.

We lay down together, never breaking our connected bodies even as I soften inside of her, my head resting on her shoulder as she threads her fingers through my hair. I'm running one hand up and down her side and her body is completely relaxed below mine. I adjust so I'm hovering over her partially and I gently press my lips to hers. I don't try to deepen the kiss, instead concentrating on how soft her lips are, and how easily they mold to mine. She lets out a soft moan and when her lips are parted I slowly push my tongue to hers. We don't fight for dominance, we simply let our tongues softly dance. These aren't kisses to lead to something more, and she knows it. We are kissing each other simply because we want to. It feels so foreign to want this, my previous experiences haven't had passion they've simply been a release. For the two and a half years I've been in Dauntless I thought I was fine being alone. I thought no strings attached fucking was all I needed. I realize in this moment that I was wrong. Laying here with Tris, just kissing and touching her intimately is what I was unknowingly missing. For right now there's no uprising and no war. There's nothing that exists outside of this.

Our moment is broken by the door opening, I quickly throw our blankets over top of us as Peter walks into the darkened room.

"Fuck this room is always so dark. Are you sleeping?" He asks.

"Nope, awake. Did you need something?" I ask while trying to calm my racing heart. I hear his bed frame squeak, so I assume he's planning on staying. Fuck.

"Not really, I was just bored. I was hanging with Will and Chris, but it seemed like they wanted to take advantage of some alone time since Tori was out of the room, if you know what I mean. Uriah and Marlene are locked in their room doing god knows what. Can't find Tris or Tori and Zeke and Shauna are getting some sleep before heading out tonight so I figured I'd come see what you were up to. Jesus it's dark in here, I'm just gonna turn this lamp on, watch your eyes man." Before I can protest, he's leaned over and turned the light on, and his eyes automatically move to where I am lying partially on top of Tris.

"Tris is in here? Oh shit. Oh wow. Are you two naked under there? Fuck. I knew it smelled like sex in here. Did I interrupt something? Jesus Christ, you're naked under there, didn't you just hate each other a few days ago? Oh my god I interrupted hate sex." Peter rambles.

"Peter, shut up." Tris yells. I can't help but laugh.

"Are you two fucking?" He asks.

"No, thankfully we just finished before you walked in." Tris replies sarcastically and I laugh even harder.

"What the fuck did I walk in on? I'm so confused." He replies shaking his head.

"We're in a bed, naked, think about it. I'm sure you can figure it out." I reply.

"This is so awkward. I'm talking to naked people. Who just finished having sex." He replies.

"Peter, get out!" Tris yells.

"Ok, stop yelling, I'm leaving." He stands up and heads to the door.

"Give us a few minutes to get dressed and you can come back in. Sorry man, I should have locked the door." I reply.

"I'm just gonna stand in the hall. Just open the door when you're done, or should I give you time to, um finish or whatever. You know what, I can find something to do. It's fine. I can go. Better yet, I'll just find somewhere else to sleep." He rambles again.

"Peter, wait in the hall. She was telling the truth when she said we had just finished." I reply laughing while he sheepishly walks out the door. I get up to lock it and Tris pulls the blankets over her head.

"That was so embarrassing." She groans.

"It could have been worse. We could have been in the act, or it could have been Christina." I laugh while tossing her clothes on the bed. She giggles as she starts to get dressed.

"God, if it had of been Christina, the entire population of Chicago would know before we had time to put our pants on." She replies.

"I don't care who knows." I remark while buckling my belt. Tris stops what she's doing and looks up at me. "Before you ask, yes I really mean that."

She pulls her shirt back on and smooths her hair. "I care. If this is just a casual thing I don't need anyone else to know about it. It can stay between us, well us and Peter." She says quietly, clearly waiting for my reaction.

"I thought I made it clear earlier that this wasn't a casual thing for me Tris." I reply evenly. "Everything else might be crazy around us, but I want this, I want to be with you."

"Ok." She replies.

"That's it? Just Ok?" I ask. "We have other things to plan and focus on. I want this to not be something we have to question or worry about. When we open this door and face the real world again, I don't want there to be any doubts about what we are."

"Good. I want this too. No more questioning it." She replies. She walks over to me and snakes her arms around my waist. I circle mine around her back and we take a moment just to hold onto each other. I press my lips against her forehead and hold them there, and she sighs contentedly.

"Ok then. Ready for reality?" I ask and she nods. I open the door and Peter slowly enters the room and flops onto his bed.

"Sorry again about that, I really should have locked the door." I say.

"I shouldn't have just barged in. Although I absolutely never thought I'd walk in on the two of you doing anything naked. That's pretty much the last thing on earth I thought that I'd ever see. I'm still perplexed, and possibly scarred for life." He shakes his head.

"We had a blanket covering us, so it couldn't have been too traumatic." I reply, scooting into bed behind Tris.

"So are you two really a thing? I mean I kind of thought maybe you were since Tori said what she did in the meeting today. But then again it's you two, which makes no sense at all to me. Anyway, is this something that needs to be kept quiet?" He asks.

"People already kind of know, or at least suspect it, we haven't really had to confirm or deny it until now." Tris replies shyly.

"It's not being hidden. I'm sure people will draw their own conclusions." I answer.

"Well, it's not my business to tell, so it's whatever you two decide." Peter replies, shaking his head. "I'll just make sure to knock before entering from now on." He smiles.

"Fair enough." She replies with a smile.

"At least you two finally found a way to get along." He laughs and we can't help but join him.


	8. Chapter 8

**Gotta give a special thank you to jesslarhea for her advice with this chapter. If you haven't checked out her work, what are you waiting for?**

 **Thank you for all of your reviews!**

Tris POV

 ** _Flashback_**

 _I'm running away from the chaos, away from the sea of soldiers in black carrying out execution style killings on innocents in grey. I keep thinking about what Eric told me to do: go to Amity. I need to get to the train. I pause briefly to get my bearings and I see two people running towards me, one in Dauntless black the other in Abnegation grey._

 _"Tris, wait." Tobias yells to me. Eric's warning to stay away from Four echoes in my mind, but I can't run away from Tobias, he loves me, he'd protect me. When he gets closer I see that his companion is Marcus Eaton. Tobias reaches out for me and pulls me into his arms, holding me tightly._

 _"Oh my god Tris, I thought something had happened to you." He breathes into my hair._

 _"We don't have time to do this, we need to get moving." Marcus says._

 _"Where did you go? Why are you with him?" I ask Tobias._

 _"I ran into him while I was looking for you. Tris, we don't have time to explain. We found your parents, they're hiding in the church basement with the other council members. We need to hurry." Tobias replies._

 _"They're alive?" I ask._

 _"Yes, they're safe, we will keep them safe." He answers._

 _"Ok, let's go now." Marcus says. "I'll cover you two."_

 _Tobias and I start making our way towards the church. We see a formation of Dauntless soldiers heading towards us. We start snaking a path in between buildings, trying to keep as much distance in between us and the sim soldiers as we can._

 _"Tobias, I need to stop, I need to catch my breath." Marcus says, as he leans heavily against the building we're close to._

 _We all take a look around to check our surroundings. Marcus starts to speak._

 _"Tris, look, there appears to be a sniper on that building." He says while pointing at a distant abandoned factory._

 _I turn and squint to get a better look. Suddenly, I am hit on the head with a hard object and I fall to the ground. I see spots, but I quickly turn over to face my attacker. I find Tobias on top of me, straddling my waist._

 _"Finish the job Tobias." Marcus spits. "Hurry up."_

 _I'm desperately trying to wriggle out from under his weight but before I can form a coherent thought he's punching me. With every blow I fade further away, but I won't let him kill me. I start to fight back, kicking and punching. Suddenly, his hands are around my throat, and he's choking me._

 _I'm struggling to breathe, trying to remember the fighting techniques he and Eric showed us but everything is fading away. Earlier today, the man who I thought hated me and wanted me dead saved my life, just for the man who I thought loved and protected me to end it._

 _ **End Flashback**_

"No, stop!" I scream. There's someone on top of me, holding my arms down. Voices. Who's doing this to me?

"Tris, it's me, it's Eric. Wake up."

"Should I get someone? Chris? Caleb?"

"Peter, calm down. You're not helping!"

I start thrashing, but the weight on top of me doesn't allow me to move.

"Please stop!" I scream.

"Shhh Tris, it's ok, I'm here. It was just a dream, I'm here. No one is going to hurt you. Come on, open your eyes. Let me see those beautiful eyes of yours." Eric whispers, I can feel his warm body.

"No! Get off me!" I scream.

"Tris, it's ok, it's just me. I won't let anything hurt you. Please, just open your eyes." His mouth is right by my ear, his voice is so soft and soothing. I open my eyes and see Eric's grey eyes and not Tobias' dark blue ones.

"He was choking me. I could feel it. I was dying." I sob.

"You're here with me, no ones gonna hurt you. I'm here." Eric says, shifting his weight a bit but not letting me go.

"It wasn't a dream, it happened. I remembered it." I reply in between sobs.

"I'm gonna give you two some privacy and sleep in Zeke and Shauna's room, they are already gone." Peter says before slipping out of the room.

"Tris, tell me what you remembered." Eric says softly. He shifts so he's no longer lying on me, instead he's pulled me onto my side so that we're facing each other. I wrap my arms around him as tight as I can. He returns the gesture, wrapping his arms around me and holding me as close to his body as possible.

"I feel safe." I say once I've calmed my crying down. "This is real."

"Yes, this is real. I'll always keep you safe." He replies.

"I remembered what happened after I ran away from you in Abnegation. I was just running, I didn't know where I was going, all I could focus on was staying away from the people who wanted to hurt me. I stopped long enough to get my bearings and they found me. Tobias and Marcus. They told me they would take me to my parents. I followed them, and we stopped next to a building for Marcus to catch his breath. Marcus told me there were snipers on another building and when he pointed them out to me Tobias knocked me down. We were fighting, he was punching me and I was trying to fight back but he was so heavy on top of me. I tried Eric, I tried to remember everything you had taught me during training. He started to choke me until I passed out." I recall.

"Tris, a lot of your memories aren't going to be good. What they did, and what Jeanine did is horrible. But I'm here, I'm not going anywhere ok?" He replies.

I loosen my grip on Eric and pull away from him slightly. He does the same and I notice he has a bruise forming on his jaw.

"Oh my god, I hit you." I say, horrified. "I'm so sorry."

"Tris, it's ok. You didn't realize what you were doing. You thought I was your attacker." He replies, and leans in to give me a kiss. "Seriously, I'm fine. It's ok."

"I'm still sorry for hitting you." I sigh.

"Think you can try to sleep?" He asks.

"What time is it anyway?" I ask. He looks at his tablet.

"3:17 am. Zeke and Shauna's group made it back to Dauntless safely." He replies.

"That's good news. Where's Peter?" I ask.

"He left to sleep in Zeke's old room." He replies.

I scoot up and kiss the underside of his jaw, moving slowly down his neck and then pepper kisses on his muscular tattooed chest, pausing to tug on his nipple rings. I slowly move my hand down and skim over the front of his boxers. I can feel him twitch below my hand.

"Tris...no distraction sex..." He breathes.

"It's not distraction sex if I'm trying to seduce my boyfriend." I reply before slipping my hand into his boxers and starting to stroke him. His breathing hitches as I move my hand up and down, and circle his sensitive head.

"Tris, you're making it extremely difficult to turn you down." He whispers.

"Then don't. This isn't a distraction. This is making the most of our time alone while we still have it."

"Lock the door." He whispers. I get up, lock the door and take all of my clothes off before crawling back into bed. I notice Eric has already removed his boxers, and is slowly stroking himself. I straddle his waist and lean in to kiss him, taking advantage of his parted lips to slip my tongue to his. I feel him rubbing himself at my entrance and I slowly lower myself onto him. I begin rocking my hips back and forth, then brace my hands on his chest so I can start riding him harder, our kisses becoming rougher. He grips my hips, meeting my thrusts and pulling me impossibly closer to him. His breathing is erratic and heavy, he's mumbling my name and a string of expletives while his tight grip threatens to leave bruises on my hips.

"Tris, I can't..." He starts moaning. I can feel the tension in his thighs below me, and I know he's close.

"Eric, let go baby. I wanna watch you fall apart." I whisper and he starts thrusting harder into me, meeting me each time I sink back down onto him.

"Tris...fuck... I'm cumming..." He moans before spilling inside of me. I let him ride out his orgasm before I slowly lift myself off of him. He pulls my face to his and kisses me hungrily.

I snuggle into his side, with my back to him, and he quickly turns to his side and pulls my back flush to his chest. He snakes his arms around me, and we entwine our legs. I can feel his breath on my neck.

"This makes me feel safe." I whisper.

"What does?" He asks.

"You, wrapped around me like this."

He kisses my shoulder. "I'll always keep you safe Tris. You never have to worry."

The warmth of his body, along with his steady breathing lulls me to sleep.

We're awoken by the alarm on his tablet. I stretch to silence it and Eric sleepily groans. He wraps his arms around me tighter and kisses me behind my ear.

"Morning." He says.

"It's too early." I whine and he chuckles.

"We have to deal with Four." He sighs.

"I know we do. Are we sending him straight to his mother?" I ask.

"I think it would be best. We just need to give Edward enough time to get back and settled. Edward is going to be keeping a close eye on Four." He replies.

"I like that idea."

We shower, get dressed and grab a quick breakfast before heading to the basement to talk to Four. I buzz the speaker box and a familiar voice answers.

"What do ya need?"

"Hey Gavin, this is Tris Prior and Eric Coulter, we're here to speak with our prisoner." I reply.

"Hey there Tris, I'll buzz you in."

"You two are friends?" Eric asks me, quirking his eyebrow.

"He was here when I visited yesterday. He's a nice guy." I reply as the doors buzzes and we enter the next room. I place my hand on the scanner and gesture for Eric to do the same. Gavin opens the heavy door and gestures for us to come in.

"Two Dauntless leaders. We don't get this much." He chuckles. "Want me to put him in a visitation room this time?" He asks.

"Yes, please." I answer, hoping Eric doesn't catch what Gavin said. Based on the look on his face, I know he heard it.

We're led to a small room with a table and several chairs. "Here you go, I'll go get him shackled up, we'll be back in soon." Gavin replies before heading out the door.

"I was in his cell last time. He was not shackled." I say, trying to avoid a fight.

He shakes his head. "We will talk about these things before doing them next time." He says calmly.

"Yes, we will." I reply and reach over to squeeze his hand briefly.

Gavin brings a shackled Four into the room. He chains him to the table and gestures for him to sit. "I'll be right outside if you need anything. Just holler." He says before exiting the room.

Eric fixes his glare on Four, who glares back. "Four." Eric says.

"Eric. Tris." He replies.

"Lets cut to the chase. Your blood tests reveal that you received the mind control serum, so we are willing to make a deal with you in exchange for allowing you back into Dauntless." I say.

"Why do I need to agree to a deal? You just told me you know I was drugged." He replies.

"You're still a faction traitor, do we really need to spell it out for you?" I reply angrily. He scowls at me.

"What kind of deal?" He asks.

"Well, there are a few things. The first being we want to send you back to the factionless so that you can gather information from Evelyn." Eric says.

"So, you want me to be a mole?" Four asks.

"Yes." I reply.

"Ok, what are the terms of this deal?" He asks.

"We expect you to report back to us every other day, at the minimum. If there is something going on that requires an immediate update, you are to find your way back to us using any means necessary." Eric replies.

"I can do that. What else?" He asks.

"You will be given no weapons, and no access to weapons until you are proven trustworthy." I reply. He glares at me.

"You are going to send me into enemy territory unarmed?" He scoffs.

"Yes. You'll figure out a way to protect yourself. We're not helping with that. You were doing just fine sneaking from Dauntless to Evelyn before, so I'm sure you'll manage." I reply, making no attempt to hide my disgust with him.

He sets his mouth in a line and glares at me, his eyes so dark they appear to be black. "Fine." He replies.

"One last thing, you tell me exactly what serum your father injected into Tris before you took her to Jeanine." Eric says. I look over at him with surprise, I had no idea he was going to ask about this.

"We didn't inject..." Four starts, Eric cuts him off.

"Do not lie to me." Eric growls. "We have you on video surveillance. We know your father injected her with something. Think carefully before you next speak." Eric pulls his pistol out of its holster and lays it on the table in front of him, far out of Four's reach.

"You are seriously going to threaten me?" Four asks incrediously.

"No threat here. You answer me honestly or I kill you. See _Tobias_ you seem to forget that I was given full jurisdiction for your sentencing. If I feel you need to die, I will take care of my duty." Eric says in a low voice. I've found this tone coming from him is much scarier than when he yells.

Four cocks his head to the side as if he's considering the offer. He looks at me, and then back to Eric.

"I'll answer that if she answers a question for me. Truth for truth." He replies, keeping eye contact with Eric.

"You're in no position to negotiate." Eric growls.

"Look, if you kill me none of your questions get answered." Four replies. "I'm not asking for much, just some answers to simple questions."

"We can get the answers we need from a blood test." I reply.

"No, you can't, and he's smart enough to realize that." He gestures to Eric. "It's been too long since you were last drugged." Four replies smugly. "So, you need me Tris." He watches me for a reaction.

"What's your question?" I ask.

"The one you wouldn't answer yesterday." He replies.

"I don't have time for your games. Ask your question." I reply.

"Are you fucking him?" He sneers. Eric moves to stand up, but I put my hand on his thigh.

"Yes." I reply, looking directly into Tobias' dark blue eyes. I can tell that he never expected me to answer the question, and he surely didn't expect me to answer in the affirmative.

"Why?" He spits.

"That's not how this works. You said a truth for a truth. Answer our question now. What did your father inject me with?" I ask.

"We were told it was memory serum, apparently we were lied to." He replies.

"Where'd you get this serum?" Eric asks.

"Not so fast, a truth for a truth, remember?" Four replies.

"What's your question?" I ask.

"It's not for you, it's for him." He replies.

"What?" Eric sneers.

"I heard about your little confession under the truth serum." Four replies. Eric glares at him and the two men stare each other down in silence. Eric's sharp voice cuts the tension.

"That's not a question. Moving on..." Eric replies but Four cuts him off.

"Do you love her?" He asks.

Eric is silent, considering his answer. I decide to speak up.

"He doesn't need to answer that." I reply. "Ask a different question."

"Fine. Do you love him?" He asks me. Eric doesn't give me a chance to answer before he begins speaking again.

"I'll answer your question. If you heard that I was asked that question and that I answered it under truth serum then you already have your answer, unless you are insinuating that I could somehow lie under the truth serum." Eric replies coldly.

Four scoffs and shakes his head, opening his mouth to reply. I raise my hand in a silencing gesture. "Now answer his question."

"The serum was given to Marcus by Jeanine." He replies.

"Why would you want to use memory serum on Tris if you knew she would be killed?" Eric asks.

Four considers the question, then raises his eyebrows. "My turn for a question."

"What do you want to know?" I ask.

"Do you love him?" He asks.

"I'm not answering that. What I feel for him is between the two of us, and frankly it's none of your damn business. He was forced to admit things he wasn't ready to, or even aware of in front of strangers, and yet that's not enough for you. If you have another question then ask it, if not I'm done. Consider this a warning: you are testing the limits of my patience." I reply.

"As I thought, you don't love him. It's a shame, huh Eric?" He asks.

"Is that your question, _Tobias?"_ Eric replies, putting emphasis on using his real name.

Four glares at Eric before turning his eyes to mine. "How do you feel about me?" He asks.

"I feel nothing for you." I reply.

"You did before Tris, why deny it now? Why throw it all away?"

"You had your fucking chance!" I stand up and bang my fists on the table. "You can stop questioning me about my feelings or our relationship. You lost any chance you had the minute you left me alone in a war! How many times do I need to tell you that before you believe me?"

"Four, this conversation is about to be over, you are currently outliving your usefulness." Eric warns. "I'm tired of your games."

"Eric, it's not important. Besides, we have no idea if he's even telling us the truth." I reply, standing up and walking towards the door.

"I am telling you the truth. Look, I know what it's like to be shot up with all kinds of serums like some sort of fucking lab rat." He stops speaking suddenly, perhaps realizing that he's said too much. I glance over at Eric, meeting his eyes and wonder if he's thinking what I am thinking - that we are possibly as close to getting the real truth from him as we've ever been.

"Answer his question, why did you give me memory serum?" I ask.

"He wasn't going to stop until he found you. So, it was an insurance policy of sorts for me. Whenever he found you, I wanted to be sure that the only thing you remembered was what happened in Erudite." He replies.

"You fucking bastard. It wasn't enough that you lied to me for months, killed my parents, delivered me to my guaranteed torture and possibly to my death, you wanted to be sure if by some miracle I actually survived that I remembered nothing of my life before? You make me sick."

"I already told you I wasn't in control of what I was doing. You're treating me as if I had some sort of choice." He replies. I open my mouth, but before I can speak, I feel Eric squeezing my hand hard. I meet his eyes and I can see him silently pleading with me. I realize that I am dangerously close to letting Tobias know that we're aware of his resistance to serums. I close my eyes and take several deep breaths.

Four looks between Eric and me, taking in our entwined hands. "Does she know about Dalia?"

Eric shifts uncomfortably in his chair, then stands before picking up his gun and pointing it at Tobias.

"Wait, stop!" I yell, as I place my hand on Eric's arm. "You don't want to do this."

"So, are you going to do the same thing to Tris as you did to Dalia?" Four asks.

"Tobias, shut up!" I yell. He just continues to glare at Eric.

"Go ahead and kill me Eric. Just like you did her."

"Say goodbye asshole." Eric says and I quickly jump in front of him.

"Tris!" He yells. "Fuck! I could have shot you! What are you doing? What are you thinking?"

"He's not worth it. Please Eric. You don't want to do this, not like this. This isn't who you are." I calmly say, running my fingers across his in an effort to relax the vice like grip he has on his weapon. "Please. Don't let him make you someone you're not." I feel his hand relax slightly under mine, and I slowly take the pistol from his hand. He takes a deep breath, closing his eyes briefly. He then gently caresses my cheek before returning to his seat. He grabs my hand, then turns his attention back to Four, who is visibly shaken.

"You were only supposed to ask one question but I will answer both questions, the answer is no to both. You now owe us two answers." Eric spits.

"Where is Marcus?" I ask.

"Dead. I killed him." He answers without emotion. I glance at Eric but his face is expressionless.

"Why?" I ask before thinking.

"You know exactly why." He scoffs. "I don't care that Evelyn was willing to forgive and forget, I wasn't."

"What is your mother planning on doing with the serums she has?" I ask. He quickly turns his head to mine.

"How do you know she has any serums?" He asks.

"Is that your question?" I ask. He scowls, but eventually nods.

"We saw some of them while on a surveillance mission. We can only see so much from an outsiders perspective, that's why we need you on the inside. Now, answer my question." I reply

"I have no idea what she plans on doing with the serums." He answers. We know he is lying based on what Edward has already told us.

"Are you going to help us?" I ask.

"What's my other option?" He asks.

"Death." Eric answers.

"You won't kill me, she won't let you." He replies.

"That's where you're wrong, Four. I don't want him to kill you out of anger or spite, but if you refuse the terms of our agreement we have every right to execute you like the faction traitor you are." I reply. "I'll even pull the trigger myself."

He trains his dark blue eyes on me. "Fine. I'll do it. I'll be your mole, but if I'm discovered I need to know you all will help me." He replies.

"Deal." Eric replies. "I will have you released shortly. When you're released, you will be traveling back to your mother and the factionless. You are to report to Dauntless the day after tomorrow, before midnight."

"Wait, why are you going to Dauntless?" Four quickly asks.

"It's our home." I reply.

"We need to get all of the loyal Dauntless together to organize an attack on Evelyn." Eric answers evenly. "Don't worry, we'll make sure you're out before we carry through the attack."

"So, you're going to start a war with her?" He asks.

"We're not starting this war, we're finishing what she and Jeanine started. Why, is there an issue with that?" I ask.

"No. Just I need to know when it will be so I can get out in time." He replies, a hint of nervousness in his voice.

"We will include you on our plans, as long as you prove to be trustworthy." Eric replies.

"Can I leave now?" Four asks.

"Give us some time to get the paperwork completed. We will be back later to take custody of you." Eric replies. Four nods, and then offers his hand to Eric, straining against his shackles.

"Gentleman's deal, we seal it with a handshake." He remarks when he sees Eric staring at his hand.

"Ok." Eric replies as he shakes his hand. "Don't make us regret our decision." He replies as we stand to leave.

We stop to speak with Gavin, letting him know that Four could be released, but we asked him to hold off for a few hours and blame paperwork. He smiled and readily agreed, saying he would contact us once he was ready to release him into our custody.

We walk back to our room in uncomfortable silence, not speaking at all until we close our door.

I take a seat on the edge of our bed and wait for him to break the silence.

"I've arranged for a scout to follow Four." He says before sitting across from me on Peter's old bed. "It's Kaine, one of our best."

"That's a good idea." I reply.

Eric looks down at the floor for several minutes before speaking quietly.

"Four and I were friends at one point, pretty much from the time we first met on the train on choosing day. You could even say we became best friends over time. Dalia was a fellow initiate in our class, someone who Four and I were both close to. She was divergent, she tested for three factions just like you did and Jeanine knew it. She demanded that I turn her in. I tried to keep her safe, I cared about her and I didn't want to see anything happen to her. Jeanine suspected I had feelings for Dalia, and she told me if I turned her in she'd stop the hunt for more divergents, but if I didn't turn her in she'd kill Dalia and Four. She promised to only use her for testing, and said she'd let her go when she was done with her, and only wipe her memory instead of killing her. I took the deal, I didn't personally bring her to Jeanine but I made sure she found her. I was willing to sacrifice her memories in order to save her life, and the lives of the others, including Four. I thought I was doing the right thing. Jeanine immediately broke her promise, and ordered me to deliver our trainer, Amar. I helped to hide him instead and reported to Jeanine that he had jumped into the chasm. She killed Dalia immediately due to my failure to capture Amar. After that, I never turned another person in to her. Four blames me for Amar's death, but most of all he blames me for Dalia's death, just as I blame myself every day. At that point in my life, she was the closest thing I'd ever had to love, Jeanine knew it and exploited it as my weakness."

"Eric, you understand that if you hadn't of turned her in Jeanine still would have found a way right? She had Max and Harrison on the inside too. You tried everything you could to save her, and to save countless others. You saved Amar, and George, and me. You even saved Four when you still thought he was worth saving. I know there are many others out there too who owe their lives to you and also to Dalia, her sacrifice wasn't in vain." I move across to him and kneel down in front of him, grasping his hands. "Look at me." He reluctantly meets my eyes. "I'm alive because of you. Because of everything you've sacrificed. I'm only one person, but I'm here because of you. You chose me, time and time again. You saved me."

"My feelings for you have put a target on your back. They killed my closest friend, they killed my entire family, you are all I have left and they know it. There was a reason that Four kept asking those questions today. He already knew the answer to it, but he wanted to watch my reaction, and he wanted to see if you felt the same. They're going to come after you now. Evelyn is going to finish what Jeanine started." He replies.

"We won't let them. Eric, you've protected me for over a year. You rescued me from the single most dangerous woman we've ever known. I'm stronger now, and aware, and capable of taking care of myself and of you. In their eyes we are each other's weaknesses, but in my eyes we are each other's strength. We love each other too much to allow any harm to come to the other."

Eric quickly looks down at me, eyes wide. I realize what I just said, the words that have been dancing in my subconscious slipping from my mouth effortlessly.

"You... I didn't think..." He stutters, unable to put his thoughts into words.

I know he can feel my hands shaking in his, and I look down at the floor, unable to meet his eyes. "Maybe the problem isn't that we don't do feelings, I think it's we don't know how to admit them." I quietly say.

"I love you Tris. You don't have to say it back, I just need you to know I'm not afraid to say it anymore." He says, his voice barely above a whisper. He pulls me into his lap and wraps his arms around me, burying his face close to my neck. "I can't lose you Tris." He whispers. "I will always keep you safe, I promise you."

"Eric, I won't let anything happen to either of us." I whisper. "I never want to lose you. I love you too."

I can feel his body relax, but we continue to hold on to each other. We don't speak anymore, instead we steal a few more moments to ourselves before facing the realities waiting for us outside of our closed door. We head out of our room to see Tori before the next group leaves for Dauntless.


	9. Chapter 9

**Thank you for your reviews and follows. It still amazes me that you all stick with my stories and seem to enjoy reading them as much as I enjoy writing them. I appreciate all of you. Enjoy.**

Eric POV

The next 24 hours passed in a blur. Caleb, Tris and I guided our group safely back to Dauntless yesterday evening, and we immediately jumped in to planning our attack on Erudite. We've decided that we will attack in four days. This gives us time to give Four the false information to feed his mother, and it means we can carry out the attack while he is out of the Dauntless compound.

Our attack plans are complex, but we believe we are fully capable and prepared to follow through. During our surveillance, we've determined there are less than 100 people working inside of Erudite. We will attack at night, with our troops working on controlling the people working inside. Containment is key, we will have our troops move every hostage into the largest lab located on the top level of the building. Caleb, Will and I are quite familiar with the layout, and we will concentrate on locating the serums while our troops guard the hostages. Once we have the serum ready, we will remove our troops from the lab so that can deploy the memory serum as an airborn attack. We then can concentrate on "programming" the memory wiped Erudite's into believing they are Dauntless soldiers working against Evelyn and her movement. Will, Caleb and I then will destroy the computer equipment.

Neither Tris or I have slept since arriving in Dauntless last night, and other than the meetings we've both been involved in we haven't seen or spoken to each other. I've been looking around the compound for the last hour for her and I've yet to find her. I run into Peter on my way to the cafeteria.

"Peter, have you seen Tris anywhere?" I ask.

"If you can't find her what makes you think I can?" He laughs. "You look like shit, when's the last time you slept?"

"I was heading to my apartment to sleep, but I wanted to find her first."

"Check with Christina. They usually are together. Sorry man. I'll let you know if I see her." He replies before walking away.

I walk into the cafeteria and look for familiar faces. I see Zeke, Shauna, Uriah, Marlene and Will sitting together at a table, so I head their way.

"Hey, has anyone seen Tris?" I ask.

"Last I saw, she was with Chris. I think they were heading to her old apartment." Will replies.

"I'm not really sure where that is." I reply.

"She lived with Four." Marlene says quietly.

"Of course she did. Thanks." I reply, before heading up to the leadership residence wing. Four's apartment was on the opposite end of the long hallway from mine, but it still surprises me that I had no clue that Tris lived with him. I make my way to his door and knock. Christina opens the door, but when she sees me she immediately steps outside.

"She's in bad shape. Really bad. She swears she doesn't want to see you, but I think you'd better come in. Can you handle this?" She asks.

"I can handle anything that relates to her." I reply and she keys in the code to unlock the door. We walk in and Christina points me towards the bedroom.

"I'm going to wait out here. Let me know if you need me." She says, taking a seat on the couch.

"Thank you for being here." I say to Chris before walking towards the bedroom. I can hear Tris crying behind the closed door. I turn the handle and it's unlocked, so I take a chance and walk in. I'm not prepared for what I see, she has broken almost everything she could get her hands on, and there are men's clothes strewn across the room. She's crying hard, sitting on the bed with her knees drawn to her and her arms wrapped around them.

"Tris, I'm here." I say, approaching the bed.

"No, get out. You don't need to deal with this." She sobs.

"I want to deal with this. Talk to me Tris." I reply, taking another step towards her.

"He killed them. He took me to her. He tried to wipe my memories. My parents are gone." She cries.

"I know he did, and we are going to make him pay for all of his crimes. Tris, if this is too hard for you I'll put the fucking bullet in his head myself as soon as he comes back."

"No. I can do this. I want Evelyn dead." She replies.

"We have a solid plan. She's going to pay for what she's done." I sit on the edge of the bed, and place my hand on top of her knee.

"I hate that you're in here. I didn't want you to have to come here. I was just going to pack my things and leave, but then I realized I had nowhere to go. I never got my own apartment after initiation."

"I don't hate that I'm here." I lie. Of course I don't want to be sitting on the bed she shared with him, but she doesn't need to hear my petty jealousy right now. "I can't imagine trying to sleep without you in my bed, so what do you think about staying with me?" I ask.

"I'd like that." She replies. "Eric, I don't want to cry anymore."

"I definitely don't want you to, but Tris you cry as much as you need to. Holding it in wont help. Believe me."

She reaches for my hand and gestures for me to come closer. I scoot over to sit beside her, our backs against the wall.

"I've been so selfish. You've lost just as much as I have due to this war." She says while grasping my hand.

"We've both lost a lot. This is why it's important that we bring her down. What's more important is we do it together. I don't want to scare you." I reply.

"Why would you scare me?" She asks.

"You're all I have left. I have no family anymore. The people I thought were my friends turned on me, and people I never would have imagined trusting are now here by our side."

"I'll be your family." Tris softly says. I turn to face her.

"Yeah?" I ask. She leans in and presses her lips gently to mine.

"Yeah. You don't scare me. You're also a lot better at communicating than you give yourself credit for." She replies.

"It must be you." I reply with a small grin. She returns my smile with one of her own.

"I love you." She says, looking in my eyes.

"I love you too." I kiss her softly, wiping her tears away with my thumbs. "Lets get you home."

"I don't have a home." She replies softly.

"Yes you do, with me. That is, if you want to. I know I told you earlier you could stay with me, but you could actually live with me. It could be our home." I suddenly am very nervous.

Tris looks up at me and nods her head. "Ok."

Christina, Tris and I pack all of Tris' things, and we make a few trips between apartments until we have everything of hers moved.

"Thank you so much Chris." Tris says, engulfing her friend in a hug.

"Anything for you. I love you honey. Get some rest, we'll wake you if we need anything." Christina replies.

"Thanks Christina, really." I say. Christina shocks me with a hug.

"Take good care of her." She whispers and I nod as we break our embrace. "I'll see you both later." She replies as she walks out the door.

"I really need to shower." Tris says.

"Come on, let's get you set up." I reply, taking the box with her toiletries into our bathroom.

"There's nothing feminine in here at all." She chuckles.

"Well, no. I've never lived with anyone before." I reply as I clear space for Tris to store her belongings. "Towels are in this closet. There's a hamper here for dirty clothes and another for dirty towels." I point out the hampers inside the closet. "Feel free to move anything of mine that's in your way." I ramble nervously, wiping my sweaty palms on my pants.

"Hey, are you ok?" She asks.

"Yeah. Just nervous." I reply.

"I could stay somewhere else Eric..."

I interrupt her. "No, Tris, that's not what I want. I really want you here. I'm just nervous about this. I've never done the whole relationship thing, so I need to make sure I do it right."

"It's ok. I want to be here. Thank you for sharing your home with me." She replies. "Do you want to shower with me?" She asks.

"Oh..well yeah of course I do." I grin. She turns on the water to warm and brushes her teeth while she waits. I join her, standing next to her and brushing my teeth. This is the most time I've ever spent with a woman that I've been physically involved with. I don't know how to act.

Tris steps into the shower and gestures for me to follow her. "You've never done this before, have you?" She asks once we're both in the oversized shower.

"Shower with someone, no." I reply. She squeezes some of my body wash onto a pouf and begins washing me.

"You've been with a lot of women though. How is this your first time showering with someone?" She asks.

"How do you know how many women I've been with?" I ask, pushing her wet hair off of her face.

"Well, the girls who came in for tattoos had a lot to say about you, and your reputation." She replies softly. I grab her shampoo and begin washing her hair.

"I'm sorry." I say, not knowing how to broach the subject of our pasts.

"Eric, is it a lot?" She asks. Fuck. I knew this question would eventually come up. How do I explain no strings attached fucking to someone from Abnegation?

"Tris, I don't know the number. I don't keep track of things like that." I reply. I can almost see her mind working, trying to process what I've said. "Hey, look at me please." I tilt her head up, "I know my attitude regarding sex is completely different than yours. I want you to know that the women I've been with before you didn't matter. I never misled any of the women I was with before. They always knew up front that I wasn't looking for anything from them other than a physical connection, and it was for one night only. That's all I wanted before you."

"How can you do that?" She asks.

"Do what?"

"Have sex with random women without any type of connection? Without a relationship?" She asks.

How do I answer this without hurting her. This entire conversation is the exact reason I've never had a relationship. Feelings complicate things. Conversations turn personal and I don't need to expose myself like that, nor do I want to. My life and my choices are my own fucking business. Why does she think she needs to know every little thing about me? I'm frustrated.

She's worth it though.

"Tris, you don't have to be in love to have sex with someone, right? You told me that you didn't love Four." I'm trying to tread lightly, I pause to get her reaction.

"Yes, but we were in a relationship." She replies.

"The first night we had sex, you and I weren't in a relationship. We weren't exactly close, and we weren't even sure that we even liked each other, but we had sex."

Pause again, waiting for impact...

"Well, it started as a distraction." She replies, she opens her mouth to say more but then shuts it.

"Exactly, a distraction. We didn't discuss feelings, we didn't have any type of commitment, and we could have stopped anything physical after that first night if we had of chosen to."

Realization passes across her face, and her quizzical expression quickly returns. Damn Erudite in her. She's just like me with her stubborn curiosity.

"But we didn't." She replies.

"No, we didn't. Neither of us wanted to. But, you understand how sex can be just that Tris, just a physical act whether to distract us from something or we can just do it because it feels damn good to get that release, especially when using your hand gets boring." I chuckle and she blushes. "When feelings are involved, it's completely different. Look, I may have been with women before you, a number which you're probably uncomfortable thinking about, but you shouldn't be. It was two consenting adults physically getting a release, knowing it would never lead to more. I've fucked a lot of women, ok, I can admit to that, and I'm not embarrassed by it. I've always been responsible, and clean. I've made love to one. Think about that, when you try to quantify the amount of sex I've had and compare it to your experiences, I need you to remember that you will always be my first in that aspect. Fuck Tris, you're different, you could be my last."

Her eyes widen at my last comment. Dammit, how does she do this to me? I am starting to believe I'm on some sort of permanent truth serum. This entire conversation is not something that's ever happened in my life. I can feel the nerves taking over again and I know I need to change the subject before I scare her.

"What makes me so different?" She asks.

I lean down and press my lips to hers, then bite her bottom lip before sucking it into my mouth. She lets out a soft moan, then I feel her hands on the back of my neck, pulling me closer to her. She licks my lips for entrance and we soon deepen the kiss, our tongues sliding together. I move my hand down her body and slip my fingers into her folds.

"Somebody is wet for me." I moan against her lips before sliding a finger inside of her while rubbing her with my thumb. Tris leans back against the wall, arching her back into me. I drop down to my knees in front of her, grabbing one leg and throwing it over my shoulder. I slide a second finger inside of her before circling her clit with my tongue. She groans and immediately bucks her hips to me.

"No distraction sex." She says breathily.

"It's not a distraction if I'm seducing my girlfriend." I reply, using her own words against her while adding a third finger and watching her squirm. "You want me to stop?" I ask, immediately sucking on her clit while waiting for her answer.

"God no." She moans. "Don't you dare stop."

I pump my fingers into her at a relentless pace, concentrating my tongues movements solely on her swollen bundle of nerves. I can feel her walls tightening around my fingers.

"I'm gonna..." She cannot finish her sentence before releasing, her wetness flowing down my fingers as she rides out her orgasm. I don't stop moving until she whines from the sensitivity. I pull my fingers out before standing up and kissing her deeply. We break apart for a breath.

"You never answered me. What makes me different?" She asks. I don't respond, instead I take her nipple into my mouth and slowly suck on it while massaging her neglected breast with my hand. "You're really good at distraction, but this," she grabs my painfully hard cock, "will not be anywhere inside of me until you answer." She slowly strokes me several times before releasing me.

"Tris, I need to be inside of you. Please. I promise we'll talk about anything you want after. Please baby."

"Baby huh? I like that. I never thought I'd hear you beg." She replies with a smirk before placing her hand on my cock and stroking me again, running her thumb across the head. I drop my forehead onto her shoulder. "You will answer anything I ask?" She whispers, her mouth moving against my ear, then trailing her tongue around it.

"Yes, anything." I reply before trailing kisses from her shoulder up to her neck.

"Promise me." She says before stilling her hand. "Anything I want answered." She squeezes me gently.

"Anything. Please."

"Deal. Take me Eric."

I pick her up and press her against the wall, and as she wraps her legs around me I thrust inside of her. She moans loudly, and bites down on my shoulder before soothing the bite with her tongue. She begins moving her hips and we establish a steady rhythm, while kissing each other deeply. Tris yanks on my hair to expose my neck and I feel her leaving a mark.

"God you feel good." I say while moving against her. She leans her head back against the wall and I kiss her neck, biting and sucking hard to leave my own mark on her. "You're so fucking tight and wet."

"Harder please." She moans.

"I never thought you'd beg." I reply, teasing her with an agonizingly slow pace. "Maybe I don't want to go harder." I whisper as I bite her earlobe.

"Don't tease me." She whines. I stop moving, staying inside of her while I keep her pinned against the wall with my body. "Eric..." She tries to move her hips to no avail.

"Why do you love me?" I whisper. I flex inside of her and she whimpers. "Tell me."

"Eric...please..." She whines, trying fruitlessly to swivel her hips.

"Just one question. I'll do anything you want." I whisper before kissing the sensitive spot behind her ear. "Why do you love me?"

"Because you're everything I've ever wanted. You are things I never knew I needed. You are it." She whispers. I press my lips against hers, dominating her tongue with my own. "Baby please give me what I need."

"Now you're calling me baby? That's sweet." I say as I pepper kisses around her throat.

"Eric, please, fuck me." She groans.

"Your wish is my command." I reply as I pound into her. She bucks her hips meeting my rhythm and I can feel her begin to tighten and pulse around my cock. "Baby I'm not gonna last much longer." I warn as she cums while repeating my name. I increase my pace and soon my release comes hard as I yell her name. I slowly pull out, and wash our combined fluids from between her legs.

"That was incredible, I like showering with you." I tell her while washing her back with her pouf. I kiss her exposed neck.

"For never taking a shower with someone before you're awfully good at it." She replies, leaning into my touch. We help rinse each other off as the water starts to cool down. We dry off, leaving our dirty towels in the hamper and heading to the bedroom.

Tris starts to rummage through her bag for clothes. "Hey, we're alone. There's no need." I say as I crawl into bed naked. She looks back and grins, crawling in with me and quickly cuddling up to my chest. I throw the blankets over both of us before wrapping my arms around her. My brain works overtime and I worry that I'll find a way to fuck this up.

"My question remains." She quietly says. "What makes me different?"

"Before you, I've never wanted someone for more than one night. I didn't talk to them about anything, other than whatever it took to determine if the hookup was consensual. I never wanted to share my personal space with someone. They never spent the night and they certainly didn't spend enough time here to be intimate like we are. You and me Tris we talk, we don't just fuck, I always want you around, I think about us constantly, you're different. I love you." I ramble again, nervous that she's not going to believe that she's more than anyone else I've ever known.

"You think about us?" She asks timidly.

"Well yeah, don't you?" I reply.

"I do. I worry that I'm not enough for you. I wonder when you'll get bored of me when you can have anyone else."

"You don't think I'm capable of being monogamous." I don't pose it as a question. Before her, that would have been an accurate statement. There was no one who interested me enough to want to engage in anything more than a quick fuck.

"You haven't been before." She whispers so softly I would have missed it had I not been waiting patiently for her to speak.

"They weren't you. It's not that I was ever against dating, or monogamy, it's that I didn't find anyone who could hold my interest. I'm also a very difficult person, as you've seen for yourself Tris. You're putting me on this pedestal not realizing that it's quite possible that my own personality issues didn't make me much of a prize. Sure, it might have been fun or even a challenge for these women to get me into bed, but who wanted to take the time to actually get to know me?"

"You are your own worst enemy." She replies.

"I certainly can't deny that." I sigh. "I'm just as afraid of you losing interest in me." I admit.

"You're all I want." She replies simply.

"Ditto. I mean it when I tell you that I love you."

"I believe you. I've never said the words either, outside of my family, before you. It never felt right to." She replies.

"We're in this together Tris. No matter what. I only want you."

"I love you." She whispers around a yawn. I gently run my fingers through her damp hair and down her back as she quickly falls asleep. I look down and watch her as she sleeps. She has absolutely no idea how beautiful she is. For right now, she looks so peaceful. At least while she sleeps she doesn't have to think about everything she's lost.

"I love you too. More than I ever thought I'd be capable of. I will prove that to you." I whisper and kiss her head. Eventually I am lulled to sleep by her even breathing and the warmth of her bare skin pressed against mine.

 **Tris POV**

 ** _Flashback_**

 _My entire body is sore, almost like I felt after my first day of physical training during initiation. I slowly sit up and look around, I'm in an unfamiliar room lying on a cot. The more I look around I realize this looks like some sort of prison cell. I try to stand up, wincing from the enormous amount of pain in my head. There's a glass panel on the door to this room, I slowly make my way over to the panel and look out. I see several other rooms just like the one I'm in, along with two guards, one wearing Erudite blue, the other in Dauntless black. One of the men looks in my direction, eyes widened and he gestures to the other man. They both rush to my cell, unlocking the door and entering._

 _"Tris, you're awake." The tall, tattooed muscular guard says. He looks extremely intimidating, he's dressed in Dauntless black but he has a blue band around his arm. He appears familiar with me, but I'm not sure if I can place him. He has dark blonde hair that is shaved on each side of his head, and several piercings._

 _I move away from them and sit down on my cot. I look at each of their faces, studying them, searching my scrambled brain for some sort of recognition._

 _"She looks confused." The smaller, but well built thinner guard replies. He's wearing Erudite blue, and he has dark brown hair and hazel eyes._

 _"What all has Jeanine given her?" The Dauntless guard asks._

 _"I'm not entirely sure. Caleb is the only one who's been allowed in the lab with Jeanine while the experiments are happening." The Erudite guard replies. Caleb. Why does that name seem so familiar?_

 _The Dauntless guard sits down next to me, angling his body to face me. His body language is relaxed and while his face is serious his grey eyes fascinate me._

 _"Hey, are you ok?" He asks softly._

 _"Your eyes, I've seen them before." I reply, studying his face._

 _"Yes, you have." His voice is a quiet rumble. I've heard him before._

 _"What is your name?" I ask the Dauntless guard who is sitting next to me. His face falls, but he quickly recovers._

 _"Eric. Do you know where you are?" He asks._

 _"No. Am I in danger?" I ask._

 _"There are people here who want to hurt you Tris, but there are others like us who want to help." He replies. He looks over at the Erudite guard. "Peter, go find Caleb, quickly." He commands._

 _The Erudite guard named Peter leaves the room. "Eric, who are you to me?" I ask._

 _He sighs. "One of the good guys Tris. I promise you."_

 _"I've dreamed of you. Are you real?" I reach out and trail my fingers across his hand. His hand is rough, but warm._

 _"I'm real Tris." He replies, skimming his fingers along my hand._

 _"You always say that. Every time I see you. How do I know this time is different? I can usually tell, and it makes her so angry."_

 _"It makes who angry?" He asks._

 _"The blonde woman. She hates me." I shake my head. "I shouldn't be telling you this. She always watches."_

 _"She's not here this time." He moves slightly closer to me and gently places his hands on my face, cupping my jaw_ _. He runs his thumbs softly across my cheeks._

 _"You did this before." I say, relishing the warmth of his calloused hands on my face. He nods. "You told me to run. You told me you wanted me to live."_

 _"I did. Do you remember anything else?" He asks._

 _I shake my head no. I want to remember him._ _"What am I doing here?" I ask. "My whole body hurts. I feel so weak."_

 _"Tris, we're going to get you out of here, ok? You have to trust me." He replies._

 _"You told me to trust you before, but I was afraid of you." I reply. He drops his hands to his lap. I reach out for him, missing his warmth immediately. I grasp his hands in mine. "Why was I afraid of you?"_

 _"I wasn't always nice to you. I've had to pretend that I hated you in order to protect you." He replies softly. "I'll have to continue to pretend until we get you out of here."_

 _The Erudite guard he called Peter returns and I can see another Erudite behind him. This man has lighter brown hair and brown eyes._

 _"Caleb." I say, trying to stand up. Eric quickly helps me to my feet. I walk closer to Caleb and embrace him._

 _"Beatrice, you know who I am?" He asks._

 _"My brother." I say, as I start crying into his shoulder._

 _"Could I have a moment alone with my sister?" Caleb asks and I hear footsteps and the door closing. I look up and we're alone._

 _"Caleb what's happening to me?" I ask. He guides me to the cot and we sit together._

 _"Bea, do you know how you got here?" He asks. I shake my head no. "Do you know who those two men are?" He asks, gesturing towards the hall._

 _"The one who said his name is Eric. I dream of him all the time. I remember his eyes. I can't tell what's real with him. Why does he consume me?"_

 _"What do you remember about me?" He asks._

 _"Caleb, why are you asking me that? You're my brother. I remember everything about you. Who are the other two men to me?"_

 _He stands up, and begins to pace, threading his hands through his hair. He walks over to the window of my door and looks out for several minutes, then turns around and comes back to me._

 _"You shouldn't remember anything. I don't think they gave you a full dose." He says._

 _"Who? What are you talking about? A full dose of what?" I ask. I watch as he reaches into his jacket pocket._

 _"Dammit. Why you Beatrice? Why'd you have to be one of them? You are what's wrong with our society. Why can't you just cooperate?" He asks angrily._

 _"What are you talking about? Caleb you're scaring me." I try to walk towards the door and he grabs my arms roughly. "You're hurting me." I cry, trying to break free from his grip. "Eric!" I yell._

 _"Goodbye Beatrice." He says, before pressing a needle into my neck, and everything slowly fades away._

 _ **End Flashback**_


	10. Chapter 10

**Thank you all for the reviews and follows. I may be slower to update my active stories, life and work have gotten really busy. But, I won't abandon my stories, so please stick with me.**

Tris POV

I jerk awake suddenly, covered in sweat. Eric startles beside me.

"Tris, what's wrong?" He asks.

"Is this real?" I ask. I begin to shake.

"Yes, this is real. Come here." Eric pulls me close to him and wraps his arms tightly around me. He entwines our legs together and I press against his chest, breathing in his masculine scent. I can't stop myself from shaking, "It's ok Tris, I'm here." He squeezes me tight and I do the same to him. I listen to his heartbeat.

"This is real." I say before I feel the tears start to fall.

"Tris what happened? Was it another nightmare? Did you remember something?" He asks.

"I don't know. It felt like a nightmare." I say in between sniffles.

"Tell me about it?" He asks.

"It was from inside Erudite." I quietly reply. He loosens his grip on me but I pull him closer. "No, don't leave."

"I won't. It's ok. Tell me what you remember." He replies, holding me tight and resting his chin on my head.

"I woke up in a cell. I didn't know where I was at first. I was in terrible pain, but I managed to walk over to a door that had a glass panel. You saw me, but I didn't recognize you. You were wearing Dauntless black but you had a blue armband. Peter was with you, but I didn't recognize him either. He was wearing all blue. You both came into my cell, you sat with me on the bed." I can feel Eric tensing, but I continue, "you told me your name, and you told Peter to go get Caleb. We talked, I told you I recognized your eyes and that I dreamt of you all the time. I wanted to know who you were to me because you had been consuming my thoughts. When Caleb came in the cell I recognized him. Did this happen?" I ask.

"Yes, it did. It was the only time you woke up with any type of coherence the entire time we were there with you." He replies. I quickly pull away from his embrace and he looks at me intensely. "Tris, is there more?"

"It can't be real." I say, feeling my body tremble.

"Tris, what else do you remember? Please? I want to hear it all." Eric gently replies.

"Caleb asked you two to give him some time alone with me. You both left the cell. He asked me if I knew how I got there, or if I knew who you two were, and I answered no to both. He then asked me if I knew who he was and I told him he was my brother. He seemed upset, and he started pacing and eventually looked out the window for several minutes. When he came back he..." I feel a sob in my throat, and I start crying harder at this unknown nightmare.

"When he came back what happened?" Eric asks, gently rubbing his hands on my back.

"He told me that I shouldn't remember anything, and that he didn't think they'd given me a full dose. Then he told me I was what was wrong with our society, and he didn't understand why I wouldn't just cooperate. I yelled for you. Then he told me goodbye, and he injected something in my neck." I reply, Eric immediately sits up in bed.

"Tris, are you sure?" He asks. I sit up and face him.

"That's everything I remembered. Is the last part a nightmare? Everythings so mixed up in my mind." I say, but the look on Eric's face scares me. "What Eric? What are you not telling me?"

"Tris, I heard you yell for me. By the time I unlocked your cell and got inside Caleb said he had to sedate you because you started getting violent and speaking incoherently. He told us that your waking and speaking to us right before that was a fluke." He says slowly.

"Did he give me something besides a sedative?" I ask. Eric just looks at me and shakes his head.

"Tris I don't know. He's been a part of this from almost the beginning. He's your brother. We need to get dressed, we need to find Caleb." He says evenly.

We both quickly get dressed and leave the apartment. We have no clue what time it is, but based on the number of people milling around we assume it's not too late. We soon run into Tori.

"Hey Tori, have you seen Caleb?" I ask.

"No, not since he left earlier for the surveillance you sent him on." She replies, gesturing at Eric.

"I never sent him on any surveillance." Eric replies. "How long ago did he leave?"

Tori looks down at her watch. "Maybe an hour or so. It's almost midnight now. He said he'd be out all night." She replies. "Eric, is something wrong?"

"Did he go alone?" Eric asks.

"You know, I'm not sure. Zeke and Shauna just headed back to their apartment. Uriah, Lynn and Marlene are in the control room working, Chris and Will are sleeping as far as I know. Peter may be with him, I saw him walking with him." She replies. "Was he not supposed to leave tonight?"

"No, it's just a miscommunication that's all. I'm going to see if Peter is around. Thanks Tori." Eric replies. He grabs my hand and we head towards the apartment group that our initiation class was assigned to.

"Eric, what's going on?" I ask nervously.

"We're just going to see who's home." He replies. He knocks on an unfamiliar door and there's no answer. He keeps banging until we hear stirring and yelling from the other side. A sleepy and disheveled Peter opens the door.

"What the hell man? Is something wrong?" He asks, gesturing for us to come in.

"Is Caleb here?" Eric asks.

"No, he left a little while ago for surveillance." He replies with a yawn.

"Did he take anyone with him?" Eric replies.

"No. I saw him leaving and walked with him to the train. I offered to go with him but he turned me down, said you had sent him out and he was meeting up with some of the other scouts assigned to watch Four. The idiot went out alone again?" Peter asks.

"Yeah I think so. We can deal with it when he's back. Peter, what do you mean by again? Has this happened before?" Eric asks.

"It's happened before. A few times when we were in Abnegation. This is the first time since then that I can remember. He knows better." He replies, shaking his head.

"Yeah he does. Whenever he comes back, let me know. Don't let him know he's in trouble though." Eric replies.

"You got it man. You guys need anything else?" He asks.

"Sorry for waking you up." I reply weakly.

"No problem. I'm going to kick you both out now so I can go back to sleep though." He yawns and Eric and I bid him goodnight. As soon as we're in the hallway I pull Eric to a stop.

"Was the dream real?" I ask.

"I don't know Tris." He replies. "It looks suspicious, but this is Caleb. He's been on the up and up this whole time. There's no way." He looks pained, and he's shaking his head, then his expression hardens. "Right now, we have to treat this like we would if it were anyone else. We have to assume the worst and hope for the best. We need to get him to Candor when he comes back." He replies.

"Why?" I ask, knowing what's coming.

"We need to question him under truth serum." He sighs.

"He's my brother. He helped rescue me." I say, feeling my voice break.

"When he gets back we'll get this entire mess sorted out. It has to be an explanation for everything." He replies.

"Be honest with me Eric." I reply.

"I am being honest. I can confirm that pretty much your entire dream was a memory, but I can't confirm the last part when it was just you and Caleb. Tris, if there's even a slight chance that last part happened, the only way we'll know is if he testifies under truth serum. I hate to do it, but it's necessary to clear it up."

"I know. There has to be a logical explanation." I reply. Eric nods and takes both of my hands in his.

"Worrying isn't going to change it. Let's go to the control room. We can pull footage to see if there's anything suspicious." He suggests, and he leads me there.

Eric scans his access card and enters the room. Lynn's head pops up and she removes her headphones.

"Don't you two sleep?" She asks with an amused look on her face.

"Not much since getting back here." Eric replies. "Lynn, we're looking for Caleb. He left the compound around 11:00, can you bring up the footage from about 10:00 on so we can take a look?"

"Sure, no problem. I am pretty sure Mar saw him leave earlier." She replies as she kicks the back of Marlene's chair. Marlene jumps and turns around, a scowl on her usual cheerful face.

"Jesus Lynn, I've told you to stop doing that." She groans.

"You saw Caleb earlier, right?" Lynn asks.

"Yeah, he was waiting for the train." She replies with a shrug.

"Alone?" I ask.

"Peter was with him up until he left. We have the footage." She turns to her computer to find the feed.

"Audio too?" Eric asks.

"Of course. What kind of operation do you think we're running here?" Uriah answers with a grin.

"Here," Marlene hands me her headphones, which Tris and I share, as Marlene starts the clip.

 ** _From the video_**

We watch as Caleb and Peter walk into the frame.

"I really don't mind, if nothing else I can cover you until you find them. It's really not safe for any of us to go out alone anymore." Peter says

"It's ok, really. You're exhausted. I've already got a close rendezvous point right off the train. I'll be fine, besides I'm armed. You worry too much. I may not be Dauntless but I can certainly defend myself." Caleb chuckles.

"You're as stubborn as your sister. It must be a divergent thing." Peter laughs. Caleb jerks his head in Peter's direction.

"I'm _not_ divergent." Caleb replies angrily.

"Ok, damn, no need to get your panties twisted. Being compared to your sister isn't the worst thing that can happen." He replies.

Caleb relaxes a bit. "Speaking of my sister, how's her memory recovery going?"

"That'd be a question better answered by her or Eric. She was struggling a bit back in Abnegation. The nightmares started again." He replies.

"Interesting. So, her and Eric? Are they together?" Caleb asks.

"Damn man, do you not talk to her at all?" Peter replies, shaking his head.

"Well, it certainly looks like they are. I'm just wondering if it's serious." He replies.

"Gonna have the big brother talk with a guy who can split you in two barehanded huh?"

"If it's serious, I'd like to know. Not sure how forthcoming Beatrice will be." Caleb replies.

"Eric's a good guy. As for how serious they are you really should talk to them, but by my own observation he'd do anything for her. He make look and act like an asshole, but he'd move mountains for your sister. I can't say there's anyone else better for her. Why are you so worried about it?"

"Loving someone can be considered a weakness." Caleb replies. "Weaknesses can be exploited."

"Well, you love your sister, are you saying she's your weakness?" Peter counters.

"I'm logical enough to not allow emotions to dictate how I react to situations and circumstances."

"Fucking Erudite and logic. You're practically Dauntless now, think like one." Peter scoffs.

"Logic can serve you well when you're under pressure." Caleb counters.

"Ok, I'll agree with you there. But, you're on your own if you want to have a conversation with Eric about any weaknesses you think he has. I'm pretty sure that wouldn't go well. Peter replies as the train approaches in the background. "Be safe man, see you in the morning." Peter waves as Caleb runs towards the train.

 ** _End of video_**

"That's really the best we have." Uriah says once we've finished the clip. "The rest is just him moving from the apartment he's sharing with Peter through the Pit and then the two of them at the train like you just saw. Is everything ok?"

"Yeah, fine. He went out alone tonight off schedule. It's a miscommunication, that's all. If you see him before I do, please send him our way. Don't let him think he's in trouble though." Eric replies.

"Will do boss. You guys really should try to sleep. You both look like you need it." Marlene replies.

"Yeah, we'll head to our apartment soon." Eric replies.

" _Our_ apartment?" Lynn snickers. "Ok, maybe I'm behind the times, but what the hell is happening between you two?"

"We're together." I reply. Lynn, Uri and Marlene all share the same look of surprise.

"Seriously?" Lynn asks, wide eyed.

"Seriously." Eric replies. "What's with the look?" He asks.

"Sorry, it's just surprising. I mean, it's you." She gestures to Eric. "Not something I've seen before. It's good though. Might as well have something happy when the world is fucked up outside."

"I agree." Marlene replies.

"I'd give you the hurt her and I'll kick your ass speech, but I'm pretty sure I couldn't even get a punch in. So, how about you just treat her right and we'll continue to be whatever it is that we are...friends maybe?" Uriah says with a toothy grin.

"Fair enough." Eric replies, grabbing my hand. "Let's go home."

"Please make sure to send Caleb to us whenever he gets back. Spread the word too." I implore.

"We will. Get some rest." Marlene replies, gesturing for us to get out.

Eric opens the door and leads us out, stopping briefly.

"Caleb was digging about us. Do you think he wants to ensure that I'm not a weakness because he's concerned about our welfare, or do you think he wants to make sure I am a weakness that he can exploit?" I ask bluntly.

"Neither of have the answer to that right now, and you know that." He replies, frustration evident in his voice. "Do you want to go home or go get a drink?" He asks, as if reading my overactive mind.

"A drink would be good. My mind is going nuts." I reply. He leads us down to the bar, where we quickly spot Tori sitting at a table with several people I don't recognize. She sees us and waves us over.

"Hey, you remember my brother George right?" She asks, beaming at Eric. We see the man sitting next to her, he has the same dark hair and almond shaped eyes. George stands up and embraces Eric.

"I owe you so much." He says to Eric.

"Nonsense." Eric replies, stepping back from the embrace. "I only did what was right."

Another man stands and takes his place next to George, slipping an arm around him. "Eric." He says, smiling.

"Amar, my friend, it's good to see you." Eric says, extending his hand and shaking with Amar.

"You've never been one to be modest. We owe you our lives. Thank you." Amar replies. "Who is this gem?" He gestures to me.

"This is my girlfriend, Tris Prior. Tris, this is my trainer Amar and his partner George." Eric replies.

"Husband now." George beams, before hugging me. Amar is next to hug me.

"Congratulations on your marriage." Eric smiles.

"Thank you kind sir. And girlfriend? How'd you manage to get this beautiful girl?" Amar asks.

"He saved my life too." I respond with a smile. "He's also a pretty special man." Eric squeezes my hand before dropping it to instead put his arm around me. He kisses my temple.

"He truly is." George replies.

"That he is." Tori agrees, smiling at Eric.

"Ok, this is awkward." Eric replies, looking uncomfortable.

"Still can't take a compliment I see." Amar laughs. "It's ok though. He's like an onion, this one. Tris, I hope you're able to peel the layers away without too many tears." He smiles at me.

"Already working on it. It's a good thing I love a challenge. I've also heard there is a grand prize to whoever can thaw the coldest man in the compound." I reply.

"I love you already! She's a feisty one. Hang on to her Eric." Amar replies.

"Planning on it." Eric nods.

"Join us for a drink, we insist." George adds, gesturing us to sit with them. I glance at Tori and she nods with a smile. We sit down and Amar waves a waiter over.

"Dustin, these are our friends Eric and Tris. Please put their drinks on our tab." George says, Eric holds his hand up to protest, but George shakes his head at him. "I insist, the least we can do is buy you some drinks."

"Sure thing, what would you like beautiful?" Dustin asks me with a smile and a wink. Eric quickly puts his arm around me and kisses my neck softly before glaring at Dustin, who now looks a lot less flirtatious.

"Jack and coke please." I reply.

"Um, how about you sir?" Dustin asks Eric nervously.

"I'll have what my girlfriend is having." He replies evenly. I can see Dustin's adam's apple bob as he swallows nervously.

"Sure, coming right up." He replies before practically running away from the table.

"I believe you just made that boy piss his pants Eric." Amar regards with an amused look on his face. "Possesive much?"

"He shouldn't be looking at Tris that way." He grumbles.

"In case you haven't noticed there are many who look at Tris that way." George says, gesturing around the room. Sure enough, I catch a few eyes as I glance around.

"Who knew a messy bun and tank top with jeans could be so appealing." I reply while shaking my head.

Tori laughs. "You need to invest in a better mirror if you can't see just how appealing you are."

"I agree." Eric replies while placing a kiss on my bare shoulder.

The waiter returns with our drinks, and hurries away with a promise to check on us soon. I turn my attention to George and Amar.

"How was it living in Amity?" I ask.

"Surprisingly beautiful and as peaceful as you'd imagine. We both thrived on the chaos and volume here, especially with Amar being a trainer and me working in the tattoo parlor. Moving to Amity was hard at first, because I had to go alone without so much as a goodbye with my sister or my love." He squeezes Tori's hand across the table. "But when Amar joined me several months later, I was overjoyed." He smiles.

"I can't say I was particularly happy to have to fake my death, especially when it meant leaving my initiates and close friends without a word, but when Eric approached me and told me how dangerous it was to be someone like me I believed him immediately. I had no idea how much hell they put you through afterward thinking you killed me." Amar adds, looking at Eric.

"It was a necessary part of the job. I had to grow a rather thick skin in order to keep people safe." Eric replies with a nonchalant shrug.

We continue our easy conversation with the trio, enjoying the company and the distraction from the thoughts of Caleb. After nursing two drinks each, our fatigue begins to catch up and we bid our goodbyes.

"It was lovely to meet you Tris. I hope to see more of you soon, once we kick some factionless ass." George says with a smile.

"Make sure you take care of each other." Amar adds.

"We will, and it was great to finally meet you both." I reply before we bid our final farewells.

Eric leads us towards our apartment. We walk in silence, once we get to the door he speaks. "Six one seven five." I quirk my eyebrow at him. "Its the code. You live here, you should have it."

"Thank you." I reply as I punch it in and open the door. We walk inside and I immediately sit on the couch.

"Tris, we need sleep. Neither of us can keep going like this." Eric says, crouching in front of me, taking both of my hands.

"There's a logical explanation for his behavior, right?" I ask. Eric looks down at our hands and back up to my eyes.

"Tris, I don't have answers. Only Caleb does. Everything he's done from the start of this plan till now doesn't lead me to believe he's a traitor. He's been a huge part of the team." He replies. "Besides, he loves you."

"So did Four." I reply softly.

Eric moves so he's sitting next to me. He pulls me close and wraps his arms around me. "We're going to get answers. I won't let anyone hurt you. Never again." He replies, before falling completely silent.

"What are you thinking?" I ask.

"I just wish this could be normal. Just us. No fucking war." He sighs.

"Eric, there's something that's been bothering me." As soon as these words are out of my mouth, his expression hardens. I gently run my fingers down his jawline and cup his face in an effort to calm him. "What I remembered earlier, you were kind to me, when I was at Erudite. But, when I woke up in Abnegation, you were so angry with me. Why?"

He sighs and looks away from me. He begins massaging in between his eyes with his thumb and index finger, which I've noticed he does when frustrated.

"I don't want to interfere with your memories. I want you to remember things on your own, not what I tell you." He replies.

"What if I never remember? Eric, I just want answers. I know I was angry and confused when I first saw you in Abnegation, but you seemed just as angry at me. Please tell me why."

"Tris, I'm going to be as general as I can with this explanation. Please don't try to dig deeper, ok?" He asks, finally meeting my eyes again.

"I will try."

"You know Jeanine pumped you full of serums and put you through an almost constant cycle of sims, until your body was physically unable to take it. You also know you suffered from terrible nightmares once we rescued you, even though you don't remember the nightmares themselves, we've told you how bad they affected you, right?" He asks and I nod affirmation. "You and I were fine in Erudite, I'm talking about that day you just remembered. You didn't know exactly who I was, but you knew you had been dreaming of me. I'll get to that later, anyway you and I were good. You trusted me. When we got you to Abnegation you had been heavily drugged, and you slept almost constantly. You had horrible nightmares and terrors, and at first I was the only one who could calm you, until one night I was in your nightmare and you snapped. Your subconscious mind was telling you I was pretty much the devil incarnate, and I knew that, but I was angry that you were terrified of me. When I walked into the house and saw you really awake for the first time, I was happy. But when you lunged at me, I was afraid I'd lost you forever, that all of the progress that was made in gaining your trust was for naught. I'm not proud of how I reacted Tris."

"I can understand why you'd be frustrated. I would have been too." I reply, idly tracing the maze on his forearm with my fingers. "You went through so much to stop this war already, and to rescue me. I can't imagine everything you've had to deal with, and now it's starting all over again."

"I told you before that I'd found out about my family's murder the day we rescued you. That day we went completely off plan. I had no idea that Jeanine was angry with me for not personally delivering you to her. She had you, regardless of how you got to her, and she seemed to continue to trust me and treat me like a part of her team. We had a solid plan in place to not only rescue you, but to completely destroy Erudite. The day we rescued you was the first day she'd allowed me into the lab with you while she was experimenting on you. I didn't think anything of it, she'd had Peter and I guarding you the whole time anyway, so the trust was established as far as I was concerned. I was wrong. Basically, her sims were developed to expose the weakness of whomever was under the sim. When I kept showing up in yours, she questioned my loyalty. The day she called me into her lab, she confronted me about you, and she also informed me of my parents death. I shot her Tris. Sure, she had a weapon out in plain view, but I didn't even give her time to react. I ruined the entire plan, and instead of an organized destruction of Erudite, it was Peter, Caleb and me getting you out of there any way we could."

"I caused your family's death." I back away from him.

"Jeanine caused my family's murder. Jeanine. Only her." He replies. "My reaction caused us to leave Erudite intact. My reaction is why there are still labs and scientists in place to continue her plans. I need to fix this, Tris." He replies.

"You have to stop blaming yourself." I say, he places a finger over my lips to quiet me.

"Right, just like you need to stop blaming yourself." He replies.

"We're at an impass here." I reply.

"Yes, we are." He sighs. He leans down and gently presses his lips to mine. He moves his hands to my face, then trails one hand up to release the clip holding my hair in place as he deepens the kiss. He runs his hands through my messy hair, tugging lightly to force me to expose my neck. He begins placing open mouth kisses there, trailing down to my collarbone. He kisses each of my ravens before bringing his lips back to mine. He then backs away and just looks at me.

"That wasn't a distraction, just so you know. I just really needed to do that." He says before leaning his head on mine.

"We're going to finish this war. Together." I whisper.

"Everything outside of our door is a fucking mess." He whispers against my cheek. "Nothing else is all right, but we are."

I move to his lap and wrap my arms tightly around him, he quickly snakes his arms around my back and pulls me as close to him as he can. We sit together like this until a sharp banging on the door startles us. Eric gets up and looks through the peephole before opening the door.

"Hey, did I wake you?" Peter asks as Eric gestures for him to come in.

"No, we haven't really been able to sleep. What's going on?" He replies.

"Edward's here. Tori took him to Zeke and Shauna's apartment and told me to come find you two." Peter replies.

Eric glances back at me, but I'm already on my way to the door. "Lets go." I say.

"He wasn't due back until the day after tomorrow, he's taking a chance of running into Four." Peter remarks.

"Did he say why he's here?" Eric asks.

"He only said he needed all of us together. I've got Remy and Austin heading to the control room to relieve Lynn, Uri and Marlene. Tori was getting Chris and Will." He replies.

We arrive at Zeke and Shauna's and find everyone waiting.

"We're all here." I start, "What's going on?"

"Wait, where's Caleb?" Will asks.

"He's with Evelyn and Four." Edward replies. "I don't know how else to tell you this so I'm just going to say it, Caleb is working with them."


	11. Chapter 11

Eric POV

Caleb working for Evelyn? There's absolutely no way. I glance over at Tris to gauge her reaction and she looks empty. I reach out for her hand and gently thread my fingers through hers, rubbing the back of her hand with my thumb.

"Edward, explain." I sharply reply, not even trying to hide the anger in my voice.

"Evelyn keeps me in the loop on everything, but tonight she was acting very strange and keeping me at arms length. I listened in on a short conversation she had with Four about a meeting they were having tonight. So, I waited around and followed them to a building near Abnegation. They met Caleb there. He told them everything, about your plans to attack Erudite instead of Evelyn's HQ, about using Four to feed her false information and your plans to try to memory wipe him, and about the knowledge of him being serum resistant. He also told them that Tris was serum resistant as well, apparently they dosed her three times with memory serum and she's started getting her memories back each time. Caleb went to Evelyn seeking a serum that he helped Jeanine develop that would theoretically work on divergents, it's supposed to be a full memory wipe, but the divergents they tested this serum on all died. I have no idea how long he's been working with her, but I could tell by their conversation tonight that there was a familiarity there."

"She's never mentioned Caleb before?" Zeke asks.

"Not once. She has meetings outside of her compound all the time, and usually she's not so secretive about them. This is the first time I've witnessed her blatantly trying to hide a meeting." Edward replies.

"Edward, what do you know about her plans?" Tori asks.

"She wants power, she wants to run the government as one entity without factions, and she wants to eliminate the divergents, at least the ones who are resistant to serums, unless she can find a way to control them." He replies.

"Why? Her own son is one. What does she have to gain by eliminating divergents?" Shauna asks.

"So is Edgar. I think he's finally had enough of her too." Edward sighs. "She's doing more with Erudite than just developing the memory wipe serum, she's developing a mind control serum that runs long range and long term with little computer programming needed. It's Jeanine's serum but advanced, with the ability for one dose to last until an anti serum is administered. She wants to control everyone...think peace serum but permanent, and with the ability to program ones thinking, for a one time event or permanently. It's dangerous."

"She's continuing Jeanine's plan." I reply.

"You knew she had this planned?" Tris asks me angrily.

"I knew Jeanine was working on this, yes. This is one of the reasons she was testing on divergents." I counter.

"Why didn't you tell me?" She asks.

"Jeanine was working on a lot of serums, when I killed her I had no idea that Evelyn would try to continue with serum development. Evelyn has been drunk on power, she's never once shown interest in anything more than taking over the government. She's left the divergent alone. We only knew about her interest in the memory serum, not anything about continuing new serum development." I reply, trying to convince myself at this point more than Tris. Did I lose my focus and allow this to go unnoticed right under my nose?

"Edward, we need to know what we're up against now." Peter says. "We need to get you back there as soon as possible."

"Look, Caleb told them about me working for you too. I can't go back. I'll do whatever you need, but I can't go back there." He replies. "The only thing I can do is try to reach out to Edgar. I don't know with certainty that he'd turn on Evelyn, but my read on him these past few days is that he's done with her."

"You'd have to be extremely careful with that. We cannot risk another Caleb." Will replies.

"I completely agree. There's something else you all should know." Edward says. "Evelyn has refused to test any of the developing serums on Four. For as sick and twisted as she is, she's somehow realized she doesn't want to potentially kill her own son. There's only one other known serum resistant divergent to use for those specific tests."

"She's coming for Tris." I finish.

"Yes. She wants her, and I don't think she's going to stop until she gets her." He replies.

"Are you willing to go under truth serum?" Tori asks.

"Yes." Edward replies without hesitation.

"What if he's resistant and he's lying to us?" Chris asks. "Look, I'm sorry for suggesting it Edward but you have to understand our reluctance to trust anyone considering what you just told us."

"Really Chris? He's been nothing but helpful to us this whole time. None of his intel has ever led us astray." Lynn replies, exasperation evident in her actions and voice.

"He's not divergent." I reply. "His aptitude was strictly Dauntless, and Jeanine tested all of the Erudite dependents and transfers for divergence before they take their aptitude test. She called it practice, but there were records of every single Erudite dependent and transfer. He's not serum resistant. Neither is Caleb for that matter."

"He's right." Will adds. "I went through that same testing."

"Me too." Tori replies.

"How do you know about their test results?" Uriah asks.

"I worked for Jeanine, remember? I was her divergent hunter." I answer. "I had full access to everyone's files."

"I listened to their whole meeting, they're going to be prepared at Erudite and at factionless HQ. We're just going to have to go in and be prepared to fight." Edward says.

"Is Caleb coming back?" Peter asks.

"I think so. Evelyn told him he could stay the night there, but it seemed like he had plans to come back to Dauntless in the morning." Edward replies.

"Uriah, I need the gate combination changed immediately. Also, I need Four's old apartment code changed and Peter's as well. Shauna, can you get ahold of the gate guards and let them know that Four or Caleb are to be arrested immediately if they attempt to come in through the gates? My assumption is they will take the train and the initiate entrance, so we need to stay alert with internal guarding. If they make it back inside the compound we arrest them immediately. Don't try to confront them, does everyone understand?" I command.

"Edward you can bunk with me." Lynn adds.

"Thanks Lynn." I reply. "Peter, you can go with Uriah and set your door code. If Caleb does try to get in it'll force him to find one of us when the code doesn't work."

"Once we have Caleb in custody, will we be taking him to Candor?" Tori asks.

"Yes. We will need Caleb and Edward to testify." I answer.

"What about Four?" She asks.

"If he does come back, we execute him." Tris replies. Tori looks at her sharply.

"Tris, are you ok?" She asks.

"Fine." She replies, meeting her eyes. Surprisingly Tori's expression softens and I can see the sympathy in her eyes.

"It's settled then." I reply. "Edward, thank you for your work, and for bringing this information to us. Please try and get some rest tonight. That goes for all of you. I have a feeling that things will start to get messy very soon."

I notice both Peter and Tris hang back after everyone's left the room. Peter shoots me a look, so I know something is on his mind. I walk over to Tris.

"I think Peter wants to talk to me alone, I'll walk you home." I say before giving her a chaste kiss.

"I can walk back alone, it's fine." She answers. "Stop looking at me like that, please." She notices the concern in my eyes, I know how she reacted to Four's betrayal and I'm worried about her being alone.

Peter senses my hesitation. "Hey, she can stay." He calls out. I look down at Tris and she nods.

We all walk back to the table and sit, Peter looks pensive.

"Don't guard your words because of me." Tris says, breaking the silence.

"How serious is this?" He asks, gesturing between Tris and me.

"Why is that any of your business?" I counter, trying to keep my already forming anger at bay.

"It isn't, under normal circumstances, but these circumstances are anything but normal. Caleb wants to exploit whatever it is that you have here. I'm sure you already know that though. If I'm being completely honest, I also want to make sure your heads in the game. I don't doubt you or your leadership abilities one bit Eric, I've had your back from day one. I just need to know that you are focused." He replies in a much stronger voice than I expected of him.

"I'm focused." I reply evenly, not hiding the frustration I'm feeling.

"Ok then. We've lost our only inside eyes and ears. I think we may have to draw them out a bit, offer them something to make them a little more vulnerable." He says hesitantly.

"I'm listening." I reply.

"Why don't we give them what they want?" He asks quietly. I'm unable to keep the anger from rising, and from the look on Peter's face he knows it. "Hear me out, ok? One of us can bring Tris to them..."

"Absolutely not, are you out of your fucking mind?" I roar, I feel Tris' hand on my arm.

"I think we should at least listen to what he's saying." She says to me.

"Are you insane Tris? You want to willingly become a science experiment? I'm not listening to this nonsense." I stand up and Tris stands with me, blocking my path to the door. I could easily force her out of my way, but I refuse to put my hands on her that way. We stand, almost nose to nose, staring at each other angrily.

"I want to at least hear his plan, Eric. We can still say no, but we owe him at least the courtesy of hearing him out." Tris says, standing her ground. The fierceness in her eyes and body language would almost be comical, if it weren't for the seriousness of the situation.

I sit back down and glare at Peter. "Talk." I bark out. Tris sits beside me and grabs my hand.

"I'm not talking about dropping her off and leaving her there. I'm talking about escorting her there, bringing her as if I'm defecting from this group. What better way to earn Evelyn's trust is there than bringing her exactly what she wants? We can formulate a plan to rescue her, but having her there not only gets eyes and ears back into the building, it distracts Evelyn from whatever her plans are. It throws her off her game."

"And it potentially kills Tris. This isn't happening." I reply.

"They don't want to kill me, they want to use me. I've beat memory serum three times now, I handled everything Jeanine did to me. Eric I can withstand whatever they do to me." Tris adds.

"Until you can't, Tris. Do you not understand that what you're suggesting is not only dangerous, but stupid as well. You heard Edward, there is a serum already out there that killed the divergents it was tested on. You may have beat memory serum, but what if you're not so lucky the next time? Whatever Jeanine put you through gave you nightmares, you still have them. This is not happening. No way in hell."

Peter sits back in his chair, slightly frustrated. "It's a contingency plan at least. It's something if we can't figure out anything else. Eric, if we go in there blindly she could die too. Any of us could. It's a chance we take in war." He replies.

"I'm not willing to sacrifice her, absolutely not. I'm not going to sit back and watch her willingly walk into her torture and death." I reply.

"There are four other leaders to consider." Tris quietly replies. I glare at her and she immediately drops her eyes to the table and fidgets nervously.

"Are you fucking kidding me right now? Enough. I'm the head leader, so even if the four of you are crazy enough to try to put this to a vote I'd veto it. Tris, please, this isn't the answer."

"Eric, please at least consider this. My own brother is helping them now. We have absolutely no idea what their next move is. We need to be prepared, and now we officially have no way of knowing fully what we're up against. Peter's right, if we just go storm Erudite and Evelyn's headquarters with guns blazing we could all be memory wiped, or killed. Is that what you want? You want me to see you every day and love you and for you to have no fucking clue who I am? Or worse, she kills you?" Tris asks, anger taking over.

"I want to discuss other options. We need to get feedback from the entire team, and neither of us are in the frame of mind to do this right now. We've not slept in almost two days, and we've just found out that your brother betrayed us. Right now is not the time to be making life changing decisions. Can you at least agree with that?" I ask Tris. She looks almost disgusted with me. "Tris, I love you, please be rational. For us." Her expression softens slightly and she leans back in her chair, closing her eyes and crossing her arms.

"Look, he's right, we do need the rest of the team and we all need to be clear headed. We can also discuss other options." Peter says to Tris before turning his attention to me. "I'm sorry to have pissed you off man. Let's get a drink, ok?"

"We haven't really slept in hours, maybe we shouldn't." I reply.

"I'm too wired to sleep, a drink wouldn't be bad." Tris replies, looking at me.

"Ok, let's go then." I reply.

We head out to the bar in the pit, which isn't too crowded due to the late hour. After ordering a jack and coke each, we settle down and sit in comfortable silence. Peter's eyes shift to something over my shoulder, then widen. I turn to follow his line of site. There are three people standing on a ledge overlooking the chasm. Before anyone can even react, they start chanting.

"Bring us Tris Prior or the deaths continue." They each take a step forward, chanting the same words over and over.

"Christina!" Tris screams, sprinting full speed up the path. I see Tori running on the opposite path. Christina, Marlene and a man named Finn keep stepping forward with each chant. Peter and I take off running once our bodies are caught up with our minds.

I watch as Tori tackles Marlene and Tris grabs Christina as she's jumping off the chasm, holding on to her by one arm. Finn jumped untouched to his death. I get to Tris and help to pull Christina up while Peter helps Tori with Marlene. We all sit against the rocks while Marlene and Christina break out of their trances.

"What happened?" Marlene asks, obviously confused.

"You were chanting something then were about to jump." Tori replies, her voice shaking.

Christina bursts into tears next to Tris. Tris has the same empty look I saw earlier, after she found out about Caleb. I look over at Peter, Tori and Marlene.

"The serum that Edward told us about. How would they have gotten it?" I ask. Peter shakes his head.

"I have no fucking clue. Could Edward have done it?" He asks.

"There's one way to find out. Tori, come with me. Peter, Tris, take Marlene and Christina to the infirmary please. Have them tested for all serums." Peter nods and I glance at Tris who seems to be in a state of shock.

"He's dead because of me." She says quietly, looking down into the chasm.

I pull her up and hold her against my chest, wrapping my arms around her. "Not because of you, do you hear me? We're going to figure this out. I need you to focus. I love you."

I feel her nod against my chest. I kiss her fully, not caring that we have an audience.

We break apart for air and Tris looks up at me. "I love you too. I'm ok." She replies before grabbing Christina's hand and gently pulling her up, then she wraps an arm around her shoulders to balance her while they walk away. Tris steals one more glance at me over her shoulder.

Tori and I head to Lynn's apartment and bang on the door until we hear Lynn yelling. She swings the door open, wearing a robe and scowling.

"What the fuck do you want?" She growls.

"Sorry for waking you, we really need to speak with Edward." Tori replies. Lynn steps to the side and gestures for us to come in.

"I'll go get him." Lynn disappears down the hallway into her bedroom. Tori looks at me and quirks an eyebrow.

"Looks like there's another secret relationship going." She says quietly and I roll my eyes.

"It's their business." I reply. Edward comes down the hall, pulling a shirt on.

"What's going on?" He asks, adjusting his eyepatch slightly.

"Marlene, Finn and Christina were under some sort of sim just a few minutes ago. They were chanting about Tris and they jumped off the ledge into the chasm. Tris and I were able to grab Marlene and Christina, but we couldn't get to Finn. He's gone. What do you know about this?" Tori asks.

"The serum. They had to have been given the serum." He says.

"How Edward?" I ask, my voice much colder than I meant for it to be.

"It can be given orally, injected or airborne. It's odorless and tasteless, so it can easily be added to food or drinks." He replied.

"You don't think he did this, do you?" Lynn asks, gesturing at Edward.

"We have to rule him out." I reply. "I'm sorry, you have to understand that."

"He's been with me, ever since the meeting. We've been...occupied. There hasn't been a chance for him to go give anyone a damn serum." Lynn says, a blush evident on her face.

"Well, ok then. Edward, how does the serum work?" I ask.

"It's not immediate. Once a person has been given the serum, it takes a day or so to be fully absorbed by the body. Then, a computer program is used to control the persons thoughts and mind. The computer program was stumping both Evelyn and Four though. I'm surprised they got it working already, to be honest."

"Caleb." Tori says, turning her attention to me.

"Yes, the missing piece. He's exceptionally adept with computers and programming, and familiar with how the serums are made and used. He's who got this working." I reply.

"If Caleb has this working there's a good chance they'll get the other serums working too. They're going to be coming after Tris aggressively for testing. You'd better keep a close eye on her." Edward replies.

"Yes, I definitely will. Thanks Edward, and sorry again for waking you both." I reply.

"Oh, we weren't sleeping." He replies with a smile and Lynn smacks him.

"Carry on then." Tori laughs. "Let's go Eric."

We exit the apartment and head to the infirmary. We quickly find Tris and Peter sitting in the room with Marlene and Christina.

"The doctor already drew blood from both of them. They've been given a serum we haven't seen before, and from what the labs show they've had it in their system for over 24 hours. This couldn't have been Edward." Peter says.

"We know, we already talked with him, he had a solid alibi anyway. What do we do?" Tori asks.

"They've been given the general serum antidote, the same stuff we use when someone is stuck in a fear landscape or the aptitude test. We don't know if it'll work, so they're keeping Marlene and Chris until they can run more tests." Tris replies.

"Look, we can stay here with them for awhile. You two go sleep, you're both exhausted." Tori says and Peter nods in agreement.

"I'm not even going to argue. Can one of you please make arrangements for the body?" Tori nods. "Wake us if anything happens though." I reply. I grab Tris' hand and we walk to our apartment in silence. Once inside, we both go immediately to the bedroom and start getting undressed. Tris walks towards me, completely naked, and starts kissing my neck and running her tongue along my leadership tattoos.

"Are you sure?" I ask. She nods against my neck and I push her onto the bed. This might be the distraction sex we've tried to avoid, but at this point I don't care. I pull her legs towards me, spread her thighs and immediately start running my tongue across her wet folds.

"Fuck, Eric, you waste no time." She moans breathily. I grip her thighs hard to keep her in place while I circle my tongue around her clit. I keep teasing until it's completely swollen and she's writhing in my grip.

"I love the way you taste." I say before moving one hand off of her thigh and dip two fingers into her while sucking hard. I pump my fingers in and out, while lapping my tongue across her swollen bundle of nerves. The moans and expletives coming from Tris are turning me on, and I look up at her from my spot between her legs and see her watching me. I curve my fingers slightly, curling the ends while sucking on her clit and she completely falls apart, yelling my name and clenching her walls around my fingers. I pull my fingers out, licking them and lapping up her wetness before kissing my way up her body. When I get to her neck, she tugs my hair until I bring my mouth to hers. She licks my lips, obviously tasting her own excitement on them and then thrusts her tongue into my mouth, showing dominance.

I stroke myself a couple of times, then run the head along her slit, making her moan into our kisses. I enter her in one stroke, burying myself to the hilt before pulling almost completely out and slamming back into her. I repeat this several times, before settling into a slower, but hard pace which she meets thrust for thrust.

I trail kisses across her neck and up to her ears, trailing my tongue around the shell of her ear. "I love you." I whisper to her before bringing my mouth back to hers.

When we break apart for air she whispers "I love you too."

I slam into her one more time, then pull out completely. I turn us over so she can straddle me, and she quickly lines herself up and sinks on to my length.

"You feel so good inside of me." She moans, lifting herself up and down to ride me. I let her completely set the pace and control, and watch as she throws her head back and closes her eyes. Her hands travel up to her breasts, pinching her nipples while she sucks her bottom lip into her mouth.

"Tris, look at me, I wanna watch you cum."

She opens her eyes and continues to ride me, touching her breasts and biting her lip. I place my hands on her sides and trail them up and down. I feel her walls start to flutter around me.

"Cum for me baby." I whisper and she releases, riding me erratically while her wetness coats me. She slumps forward a bit and kisses me breathless. "Get on your knees." I growl in her ear and she gives me a sexy smile as she slowly slides off of me.

Once she's bent over, resting on her knees and elbows I slam into her hard, earning a loud moan of pleasure from both of us. I start pounding into her fast and hard, reaching around her to stroke her. I feel my orgasm quickly building, so I start pinching her swollen clit.

"I'm gonna cum. Please cum with me." She moans. As soon as her walls start fluttering, I pound faster and harder feeling my release rapidly building. She clenches hard on my cock, pulling my orgasm with hers as I release into her, calling her name as we both ride out our bliss.

I pull out of her and flop onto my back, out of breath. I pull her onto my chest, and gently stroke her hair.

"I love you." She says sleepily.

"I love you too." I reply. I'm dimly aware of Tris throwing the covers onto us before I finally succumb to exhaustion.

I wake up, completely unaware of where I am for a few minutes. I look over and notice that Tris' side of the bed is empty. I get up, grab my boxers off the floor and slide them on before I head out of the bedroom to find her. The bathroom is empty, and when I walk into the kitchen/living room combo I see she's not here either. I walk back to our bedroom and grab my tablet to check the time. A little after 9 am, we'd barely been asleep for four hours. I grab some clothes from the drawers and throw them on, curiosity over where Tris might be outweighing the need for a shower.

I decide to check the infirmary, thinking it's likely Tris is there with her friends. I walk into their shared room and find Uriah and Will, both sleeping in chairs next to their girlfriends. Uriah stirs awake and looks over at me, I gesture for him to step out in the hall.

"How are they?" I ask.

"It's looking good. The follow up labs are showing less and less of the serum in their bloodstream. It's possible that Evelyn hasn't perfected this to be anything permanent, or that the anti serum is working." He replies.

"Good. Hopefully we'll take her down well before she has time to make it anything more than that. Have you seen Tris?" I ask.

"Not since I first got here. She was in here with Peter and they both looked exhausted so I sent them out." He replies.

"How long ago was that?" I ask.

"I've been here since 6:00, and they left maybe fifteen minutes after that." He replies.

"Thanks man. Let me know if anything changes with Marlene or Christina, ok?"

"Will do boss." He replies with a grin before going back into the room.

I leave the infirmary and jog up to Peter's apartment and bang on the door. I wait and there's no answer. I repeat this several times until Lynn pops her head out of the neighboring door.

"Seriously Eric? Twice in one day? He's not home." She says.

"Any idea where he went?" I ask.

"Nope. Not my turn to watch him." She smirks. "And before you ask Edward is inside, sleeping."

"Thanks, and just so you know Edward isn't suspected of anything." I reply before walking away.

I walk down to the control room where Austin and Remy are still working their shift.

"Hey, have either of you seen Peter or Tris tonight?" I ask.

Remy turns her chair around. "Yeah, they left a couple of hours ago." She replies.

"What do you mean left?" I ask.

"Um, left the compound. They're still on the approved list for open access, right?" She gulps.

"Yes, but I need to know where they went. Do you have the footage?" I ask and she nods. She quickly brings up several videos for me to review. I immediately click on the camera angle near the train. "I need audio." I say and Austin hands me a set of headphones from his desk.

I see Peter and Tris waiting by the train, but they're far away from the camera and speaking so low that the audio doesn't register their voices. I can only watch as they jump on the train. My stomach clenches and I throw the headphones at the wall.

"Fuck!" I yell making Remy jump.

"Did we do something wrong?" Austin asks.

"No, but you find me immediately if either of them come back, got it?" I ask and they both nod as I walk out of the room, slamming the door behind me.


	12. Chapter 12

**Thank you for all of the reviews, we finally broke 100. You all are the best.**

Tris POV

I listen to Eric's breathing become even and hear his soft snores as he surrenders to his exhaustion. I slowly roll from his chest, moving his arm off of me as I separate myself from him. I lay on my back and stare at the ceiling, organizing the thoughts that are running rampant through my mind. I never thought I could love someone like Eric. He has always been the cold, closed off and intimidating leader who was cruel and calculated in the way he dealt with everyone who crossed his path. Sometimes I wish I could remember everything about him, but other times I'm thankful that my memories are just fuzzy enough to allow me to forget some of the awful things Tobias told me about him. I wonder how different our lives would be if I hadn't of listened to Tobias.

I lie here for a few minutes watching him sleep. This is the only time he looks relaxed, there's no furrow in his eyebrows, no looks of disappointment and no icy glares. His mouth is open slightly, and the arm that was previously wrapped around me now rests across his abdomen. His muscles are defined and the contrast of his dark tattoos and light skin is beautiful. The ring in his lip and the two in his nipples actually compliment his looks rather than detract from them, along with his microdermals above his eyebrow and plugs in his ears. He is Dauntless. He is perfect.

"I really do love you. I hope you'll forgive me." I whisper, brushing my lips against his cheek.

I slip out of bed and get dressed, not daring to make any noise. I look at Eric's sleeping form one more time before quietly slipping out of our room. I take a deep breath and walk out of our door and head to the infirmary to find Peter. He's sitting in a chair in between the two beds, dozing. I walk over to him and nudge his foot with my boot.

"Did Tori send you?" He asks with a yawn.

"No, where is she?" I ask.

"She was beyond exhausted. I kicked her out. What time is it?" He asks. I glance over at the clock on the wall behind his head.

"5:30 am."

"Why aren't you sleeping? Or doing whatever it is you and Eric do?" He asks with a smirk.

"Peter, I want to go." I reply.

"Well, go then. I've got this Tris, go to bed." He says while stretching his arms over his head.

"No, you don't understand. I want to follow your plan. We should go to Evelyn." I reply.

"Tris, no. Eric will literally kill me. You heard him already." He replies, shaking his head.

"Finn died because of me. Marlene and Christina almost did. Peter, who knows how many more people have gotten that serum? I can't have anyone else die because of me. I'm leaving tonight, with or without you."

He takes a deep breath before speaking. "What about Eric?" He asks.

"He will find us." I reply.

"You're forcing his hand. Think about this." He replies.

"He loves me. He will find us. Peter, I'm serious, I'm leaving with or without you. All I ask is if you stay, give me a head start before you say anything to Eric." I reply, standing up.

"Tris, wait." He reaches out for my arm. "Are you absolutely sure you want to do this. He's right, this could lead you to your death. This is dangerous."

"I won't let anyone else die because of me. You said it yourself, they are going to do everything they can to exploit my relationship with Eric. What if he's the next target? I can't let anything happen to him."

Before he can answer Uriah comes in. Peter fills him in on Marlene and Chris' condition as he settles into a chair next to Marlene.

"Will's on his way, why don't you two head out and try to rest. I'll be here." He says and we both nod and bid our goodbyes before leaving the room.

Peter follows me in silence before grabbing my arm and pulling me down a different hallway.

"Where are we going?" I ask.

"My apartment. We need weapons and supplies if we're doing this." He drags me to his apartment where we take everything we think we'll need. We head out towards the train.

"There's a camera over there that we need to avoid." I gesture to where the camera is trained down on us. We move as far away as we can, while still being able to look for the train. "Keep your voice down too." I whisper and he nods.

"Last chance. Are you sure?" He asks.

"Yes. I trust you." I reply.

"I'm trusting you too. Don't do anything stupid. Well, don't do anything more stupid than what we're doing now." He says nervously.

"This was technically your idea." I remind him.

"But your boyfriend can technically kill me in less than two seconds once he finds us." He replies.

I'm unable to reply as the train comes towards us, we take off running and easily jump into a car.

"You know where to go?" I ask and he nods.

"I'm going to need to zip tie your hands, I'll keep them as loose as possible. We need to make this believable, ok?" He says.

"I know."

He ties my wrists behind my back. "Tris, just remember no matter what kind of horrible shit I have to say or do to you, I mean none of it ok?"

"Peter, I know. I won't mean any of the horrible shit I say back to you." I smirk and he smiles.

"You're really fucking brave, you know?" He replies.

"You are too. You are not what I expected. I never apologized for accusing you of stabbing Edward in the eye. I should have known that it was Drew."

"Don't worry about it. It's a well known fact that I was an asshole during training." He replies.

"Was? So you're no longer an asshole?" I ask with a smile.

"Assholes can reform. You should know this first hand since you're in love with one." He smirks. His expression turns serious. "I'm going to do everything I can to keep you safe, just like before Tris."

"I know you will, and thank you." I reply.

We sit in silence for a few minutes before Peter indicates we have to jump. He holds on to me tightly to help me as we leap from the train. Peter pulls out his pistol and holds it to my back as we start walking towards a large building. Once we're closer, three people begin to walk towards us.

"Who the fuck are you?" The lone female asks, sneering at us.

"Peter Hayes. I'm here to see Evelyn." He replies.

"Evelyn doesn't accept unsolicited visitors." One of the men replies.

"Believe me, she's going to want to see me." He replies, roughly turning me around to show my bonded hands and the gun he has to my back. The man's eyebrows go up.

"Is this who I think it is?" He asks.

"Tris Prior." Peter replies and the other man steps forward.

"No fucking way. How'd you get her?" He asks.

"Right out from under their noses." Peter laughs. "They thought I was loyal to them, it took for fucking ever. This bitch is a lot more trouble than she's worth."

"Evelyn may beg to differ. She's been damn near impossible to find. I'll take her off your hands." The man replies.

"Not so fast." Peter yanks me towards him. "We're a package deal. The girl only stays if I can work with Evelyn."

The three look at each other before the girl speaks. "Jesse, let's take them in. You know Evelyn is going to want him too. He can be very useful." She smiles.

"Indeed I can. I was pretty much the second in command. They trusted me implicitly." Peter replies.

"Ezra, Cheyenne you two stay here. I'm going to escort our new friends to Evelyn." Jesse replies, gesturing for Peter to follow him. I struggle against Peter, kicking him hard for good measure.

"Fuck!" He yells. "You little bitch!" He turns towards me, and sympathy flashes in his eyes before he hits me. I can tell he's holding back greatly.

"Feisty!" Jesse says. "She's Coulter's woman, isn't she?" He asks.

"I can talk you know." I reply. Jesse stops walking and turns his attention towards me.

"Oh you can, huh? Well answer me then, you're his woman right?" He asks.

"He'll come for me." I reply, the tears in my eyes are real thinking about Eric.

"Im sure he will, that's the plan at least. Evelyn would love to be the one to put a bullet between his eyes." Jesse replies with a sinister smile before he starts walking again. He comes to a closed door with two guards. "Hey Therese, I need to go in. Believe me when I say Evelyn is going to want to meet our guests."

The woman he is speaking to nods and gestures us inside. Jesse walks in first, and once he steps aside we see Evelyn. She's a slight woman, wavy brown hair falling to her shoulders. The same hooked nose as Tobias, but her eyes are darker. She glances up and has a questioning look on her face.

"Jesse, who are these people?" Evelyn asks.

"I'm Peter Hayes, I am defecting from Dauntless and asking to work with you. I've brought someone you've been looking for." He says, shoving me forward but keeping his hard grip on my arm.

"You're correct Peter, we have been looking for Miss Prior. I must say, I'm surprised that you brought her to me. From what I understand, you are quite close to Eric Coulter and his cause." She says.

"Only close enough to gain his trust until I could get the leverage I needed to join you." He replies.

"Interesting. Well, what it is you want in exchange for Miss Prior?" She asks.

"I want to work with you. I want to be the one who watches her suffer." He replies with a dark chuckle.

"Well, that can certainly be arranged. I'm quite pleased with the gift you've brought me. You will be handsomely rewarded." The look in her eyes is almost one of hunger, and for first time since arriving I feel true fear. She stands up and walks from behind her desk, pausing to face me, placing her hand on my cheek. "You're such a pretty one. I can see why my son almost gave everything up for you. I just needed to remind him of what's temporary and what's permanent in his life." I struggle hard against Peter's grip. "So feisty. We will certainly need to keep an eye on you. Jesse, thank you for escorting our guests, can you please find Edgar and send him to me?"

"Yes ma'am." Jesse replies before scurrying out the door.

"It's too bad you didn't try harder with Tobias. The two of you together could have been unstoppable. Two divergents, both serum resistant, both raised in Abnegation and both Dauntless trained. It's truly a rare feat." She says. "But, you didn't love my son. You left him for that traitor." She shakes her head.

"Your recollection of events is highly inaccurate. The only traitors I know are your son, my brother and this asshole." I spit and lunge towards her, Peter pulls me back.

"Cut your shit Stiff." Peter growls. I feel his thumb slightly rub against my arm behind my back. It's not much, but it's comforting.

"I'll be damned. When Jesse told me that someone hand delivered Tris Prior I thought he was full of shit." Another man has entered the room. He has dark blonde hair, cut short and slicked back along with blue eyes. He looks familiar, but I can't place him, and that makes me involuntarily shiver. Peter rubs his thumb on my arm again.

"Edgar, thank you for joining us. We'll be taking a little trip to Erudite tonight to deliver Miss Prior. Could you please gather a few of your most trusted soldiers for an escort?" She asks.

"Right away ma'am." Edgar replies as he leaves the room.

"Peter, how is it that you came to the decision to leave Dauntless?" Evelyn asks.

"I was never loyal to them. I worked with Jeanine in her lab, and when Eric Coulter turned on her and shot her I wanted to save my own ass. So I helped him with Tris, and in doing so not only did I gain his trust, I became one of his closest advisors."

"You can certainly be very useful for me. I'm glad that those who were once loyal to Jeanine are making their way back to me." She replies with a smile.

"There are others under his command that aren't as loyal as he believes. I'm glad to be here, and I look forward to working for you. Especially when it comes to watching this one suffer."

"You're not a fan of hers either I take it." She asks.

"Can you stop fucking talking about me like I'm not sitting right here?" I yell and Peter pulls me to him so our faces are inches apart.

"Stop fucking talking. If we want to hear from you, we'll ask you a fucking question." He sneers. "Be a good girl." He says, running his finger down my nose. I jerk away from him.

Edgar returns with several men and women. "We're ready." He announces.

"Excellent. Let's go, we have a trip to make." She says, walking out the door.

Peter grabs my arm roughly and pushes me forward to follow behind Evelyn, when his body is directly behind mine, he squeezes my arm reassuringly.

The walk to Erudite is surprisingly short, I never realized just how close Evelyn and her followers had moved to the action. While Peter put a good show on of being rough and speaking angrily to me, his gentle squeezes and touches at times were his way of apologizing. Once we're inside the building, we are led up several flights of stairs and into a room I recognize immediately - it's the same central room with holding cells surrounding it that I was in before. I stiffen at the memory.

"Get her locked away. There are some things I need to take care of, but I will be back." Evelyn says as Edgar steps forward. He moves towards the same cell I was in before, placing his hand on the panel to unlock the door.

"Wait. I'll need access to that cell before you're locking her anywhere. We need to keep my end of this deal. I want full access to this one." Peter says.

"Oh, it's like that is it?" Edgar smiles. "You gonna share her?" He asks. I can't help the shudder that runs through me.

"I don't share." Peter sneers.

"How long you been fucking his woman?" He asks, while working on a computer station in between the cells. Peter rubs circles on my arm with his thumb. "Here, put your hand here for a scan."

Peter walks forward, dragging me with him. He places his hand on the scanner and the program begins analyzing his handprint. Edgar glances over his shoulder at me, and he smiles slightly before returning his attention to the computer in front of him.

"Ok, try unlocking her cell." Peter places his hand on the panel and the door unlocks. He shoves me forward.

"Hold still Stiff." Peter says, yanking my arms out towards him. He swiftly cuts the zip ties holding my wrists. He turns me around so I'm facing him, then leans in towards my ear and whispers "I'll be back soon." He walks out of the cell and closes the door behind him.

I watch out the window as Edgar shows him some different things on the computer. After several minutes, I see Evelyn enter the room and gesture for Peter to follow, leaving Edgar as the lone guard. My stomach drops as he begins walking towards my cell. I back up to the wall and stand against it as he unlocks the door and steps inside. He closes the door behind him and leans against it.

"He's helping you, isn't he?" He asks, keeping his distance from me.

"If by helping you mean lying to me, tricking me and then bringing me to my certain death then yeah he's a fucking Good Samaritan." I reply. The corners of Edgar's lips lift in a smile.

"You're pretty funny. For the record, I'm sick of her shit." He replies.

"Forgive me if I don't believe a word you say. If you haven't noticed, everyone in my life likes to lie to me. Speaking of liars, have you seen my backstabbing brother?" I ask.

"Yeah. And you're right, Caleb's definitely a backstabber. Look, I know you don't trust me, and you have every right not to, but I'm on your side. She wants to control people like us." He replies.

"People like us?" I ask.

"Divergents. I'm not serum resistant like you and Four, but I'm just as divergent as you are. If her little plan to control us fails, she's going to kill us." He replies.

"So what is your reward for trying to gain my trust?" I ask.

"Nothing. Evelyn doesn't know I'm divergent, as a matter of fact not many people do, but she's smart...she'll find a way to weed us out. So, even though you don't trust me yet, I'm trusting you with my secrets." He replies. "Besides, if I wanted to hurt you this is a great opportunity for me to do it. No ones here to stop me."

I feel my stomach drop again and wish that Peter would come back. Surprisingly, Edgar makes no moves towards me.

"Where's Peter?" I ask.

"Getting debriefed. Evelyn likes to analyze the shit out of people, so he may be in there awhile. He's a former Candor, I really hope he's good at lying." He replies.

"You said secrets, as in plural. So, what other things are you entrusting me with Edgar?" I ask. I don't know why I'm encourage this conversation to continue, but there's something intriguing about Edgar.

"We have more in common than you think, Tris." He says while picking at his fingernails. "Did you know I'm only six months older than Caleb?"

"So your birthday is the big secret?" I scoff.

"No. My parents are." He sighs. "I'm telling you this because I need you to know who's side I'm really on. No one knows this Tris."

"Ok...so who are they?" I ask nervously.

"I was born in Erudite. My mother was Jeanine Matthews." He replies, keeping eye contact.

I look at him and can see the resemblance. His confession leaves me with a bunch of different questions, but I don't want to interrupt his train of thought. I nod at him in response, hoping he will continue.

"My mother had a serious relationship with my father when they were both in Erudite. They grew up together and as they got older they fell in love. They had plans to be married one day." He says.

"You speak of him in the past tense, did something happen?" I ask.

"He transferred out of Erudite without warning. He'd met another woman at school, and he left to be with her. He didn't know that my mother was pregnant with me, and when she finally found him to tell him he'd already married the other woman and she was also pregnant with their first child." He replied.

"Have you ever met your father?" I ask.

"I have. I also met my brother and sister too, when we were very young. Unfortunately, he and my mother had a huge falling out over her opinion of divergents, and my mother refused to allow him to visit with me anymore. Once I left Erudite to become factionless I saw him quite often. You see, my father was also divergent, along with my half sister, which is why he had to go to great lengths to protect us from my mother."

My stomach begins to knot as his story progresses. I don't know if I can tolerate hearing anymore.

"Tris, my father was Andrew Prior." He replies and I involuntarily scoot further away from him.

"No. That cannot be true. My father would have told us about you. He would have told my mother." I reply, shaking my head.

"Tris, it's true. I got DNA from a glass Caleb was drinking from and it was a family match. We can run yours against mine too." He replies.

"Caleb knows?" I ask.

"No. Which is why I had to use his drinking glass to get his DNA. I never believed in my mother's plans, not any part of them, and when I found out he did I distanced myself from him. I wanted to find you." He replies.

"No one knows this?" I ask, my voice shaky.

"You're the first." He replies.

"Does Eric know you?" I ask.

"He'd know me as Andy. My mother named me Andrew Edgar Matthews. When I became factionless I started using my middle name to distance myself from my mother." He replies.

My head is absolutely spinning with this information. We're interrupted by my cell door opening, I look up and meet the dark blue eyes of Tobias. I glance over at Edgar and notice that the easygoing and relaxed look he was just giving me is gone, replaced by a stern and almost angry looking mask.

"Time to go." Tobias says.

"What's on the agenda? I thought Evelyn was still vetting the newbie." Edgar replies.

"Two more showed up, claiming they too are defecting." Tobias replies. "Why isn't she cuffed?"

Two more? Please let this be part of whatever Eric has planned.

"She was only zip tied before. I'll cuff her." Edgar reaches for his handcuffs but Tobias stops him.

"Why are you even in here with her?" He asks, regarding Edgar with a glare.

"Jealous?" Edgar sneers as he cuffs my hands behind my back. Tobias reaches for me and roughly leads me out of the cell.

"Where are we going?" I ask.

"What makes you think you can talk to me?" He asks. Memories of the first conversation I'd ever had with Tobias start flooding in.

"It must be because you're so approachable." I murmur and I swear I hear a chuckle from Tobias. I turn my head to try to look at him but he refuses to make eye contact. He marches me into another room, encased fully in glass with the same type of chair we had in the fear landscape room in Dauntless. "Sit." He commands, pushing me towards the chair. I struggle to sit properly with the awkward way my hands are cuffed behind me. Edgar sees my issue and he quickly unlocks the cuffs and moves one cuff to the chair, leaving the other on my wrist.

Tobias and Edgar leave the room silently and I try to take in my surroundings. This room feels sterile, but all too familiar. Tobias enters the room with a syringe and a clear serum.

"What is that?" I ask as he places leads on me. He doesn't speak, and doesn't make eye contact. "Tobias, please." I whisper.

He moves my hair away from my neck and plunges the syringe into me. Within a few seconds, the room darkens.

I'm in the training room in Dauntless, I look around and see some people throwing knives at targets and others practicing combat skills on the punching bags.

"First jumper in the ring." Four calls.

I walk over to the ring and climb in, standing near the left side. I shift my weight from foot to foot as I wait for my opponent. Soon, Four steps up into the ring. He begins circling me like I'm his prey.

"So, Stiff, who do you think your opponent should be?" He asks in an eerily calm voice.

"Um, maybe the last jumper?" I ask.

"It sounds like you're asking instead of telling. So, Stiff, who do you think your opponent should be?" He asks again.

"Molly." I reply.

"Wrong answer." He turns around and beckons someone forward. It's my mother.

"Mom?" I croak.

"Faction before blood Stiff. Now, if you're truly Dauntless you know what you need to do." Four instructs, handing me a pistol before stepping outside of the ring.

"Beatrice, you know what you have to do. It's ok. It'd be selfish of me to ask you to spare my life." She says.

"Mom, no." I reply, taking a step towards her. I feel a jolt of electricity surge through me. My moms expression softens.

"My sweet girl, you can't come closer, it's dangerous." She warns.

"One minute is up." Four bellows, and another figure makes their way into the ring.

"Dad. No. I can't do this." I cry.

"Beatrice, it's ok. You have to. We forgive you." My father says calmly.

"I love you both so much." I feel the hot tears pouring down my cheeks. "Please let me touch them." I scream at Four, but he just stares blankly at me.

"Two minutes are up." He yells. I look around, anxiously awaiting my brothers arrival. If I have to shoot someone, it will be him. I watch as the third figure enters the ring, and I panic. It's Eric.

"No!" I scream. "I refuse." I throw the pistol down but it immediately reappears in my hand.

"Tris, if you don't kill them, we will, and it will be a slow and painful death. You have one minute." Four replies.

"Tris baby, I love you. It's ok." Eric replies. "Save yourself."

I point the gun towards my head and Four laughs.

"I'll still kill them, even if you die too. It's a noble attempt." He replies.

"This isn't real." I reply. I quickly turn the pistol and aim it at Four, pulling the trigger immediately. He falls to the floor in a heap.

I wake up with a start, and look around. I'm back in the glass walled room.

"I bet you liked shooting me." Tobias says. I look around for him but I can't see him anywhere. "That's not what you were supposed to do, though. Luckily, that was just a practice run so we can get a baseline."

"What's the point of putting me through sims?" I ask.

"It's cute how you think I will answer." He replies.

I finally see Tobias emerge from behind a wall. He makes eye contact with me before speaking again. "You're still very quick to get out of a sim. It's nice to see you haven't lost your touch."

The door next to Tobias opens and Peter walks in.

"Nice to see you again, Four." Peter says.

"I see she's decided to trust you." He replies.

"Why wouldn't she? I brought her most desired plaything right to her front door. It couldn't have been any more perfect, unless I could have brought Eric too." Peter replies with a smirk.

"Eric's like a dog with a bone when it comes to her. He'll be here soon enough." Tobias answers. "Here, go ahead and give her the next dose." He hands a syringe to Peter and gestures towards me.

"What's this one?" He asks.

"You'll see." Tobias replies.

Peter scans his hand to unlock the door and walks into the glass room with me. He leans in close, making a show of moving my hair. "We're going to get out of here." He whispers. Seconds later, an army of Dauntless black rushes into the room. I watch as Tobias is shot directly in his head, his lifeless body dropping to the floor.

"That was quick." Peter says as Uriah tosses him a gun.

"You know he's not gonna let that one out of his site that long. Dude, you are fucked when this is all over though. He's pissed." Uriah replies as he helps Peter remove the leads from me. "You ok, Tris?" He asks.

"Yeah. I'm cuffed to this chair though." I reply. Peter quickly grabs his keys and unlocks me.

"Let's go." He says. As soon as I'm out of the glass room, Shauna is pressing a gun into my hands.

We leave the lab area, running down the corridor, shooting at the armed Dauntless traitors as we go. I turn the corner and run directly into Caleb. I point my gun at him, pressing it against his forehead.

"Why, Caleb? Why? You were the only family I had left." I yell.

"Beatrice, please. Don't do this. Please. I'm sorry. I believed in what Jeanine said about divergents. I never meant to hurt you." He pleads.

"Tris, we need to get out of here. They're going to release the memory serum." Peter says from behind me.

"Help me Peter." I reply, grabbing my brother by his arm and dragging him with me.

"Tris, what are we doing?" Peter asks.

"Locking him in a cell. I can't kill him, but he can get the serum with everyone else." I reply. Peter nods and we drag Caleb back to the cell pod, Peter places his hand on the panel next to a cell and opens the door. We force Caleb inside.

"You questioned me, asking me why I had to be one of them. I think the real question is why are you. Goodbye Caleb." I say, before walking out of the cell and slamming the door behind me.

Peter and I run out of the pod, hearing the screams of my name coming from my brother. "You ok?" Peter yells over his shoulder.

"We need to find Edgar." I yell back and he looks at me questioningly. We turn the corner and find Eric running towards us.

"Thank god." He yells, slamming into me and wrapping his arms around me. "I can't believe I almost lost you." He rumbles, pressing my head against his broad chest.

"I'm here Eric, I'm so sorry." We break our embrace and he cups my jaw in his hands, swiping his thumbs across my cheeks.

"Don't you ever do that again." He says as he leans down and presses his lips to mine. The feeling is overwhelming. I pull away from him, and he immediately frowns. "What's wrong?"

"We need to find Edgar. I can't explain everything now, but please trust me." I reply. He leans in to kiss me again.

"Where is he?" He asks.

He's my Eric, the perfect Dauntless man. Strong, fearless and brave. His hair is mussed slightly from the exertion, he has just a hint of stubble across his jaw and the lips that I love are slightly swollen from our kissing. It's then that I notice his lip ring is missing. When I look into his eyes, there's a slight vacancy.

"You aren't real." I sigh, he shoots me an incredulous look. "I'm so sorry I left without saying goodbye."

"Tris, what are you talking about. Baby, I'm real. I'm right here. We have to run." He says, grabbing my hand.

"You're part of the sim. I'm so sorry I left the way I did. I love you, I really do." I reply, running my fingers across his lips. He slowly starts to fade away as I feel my body waking up.

"How did you do that?" I hear a familiar voice. I blink a few times to let my eyes adjust to the bright white light of the room. I try to pick up my arm and find I'm still handcuffed to the chair. I see Caleb on the other side of the glass.

"Fuck you." I spit.

"Beatrice, you have to understand how important this testing is to our plans." He replies.

"You're my brother!" I scream. "You're supposed to protect your family. Why Caleb?" I scream and thrash on the chair, the handcuffs digging deep into my wrist.

"I think she's had enough for tonight." I hear Tobias' deep voice. "Let's sedate her and get her back to her cell."

Caleb unlocks the door and walks in, stalking over to me with a syringe in his hand. "I'm going to need a little help here." He calls out, and Tobias quickly joins him. "Hold her down."

"Don't you touch me!" I scream, kicking and thrashing. Peter runs into the room.

"What happened to her?" He asks.

"Hold her fucking legs!" Tobias yells and I see panic flash in Peter's eyes. He grabs my legs and presses his body weight against them. Caleb sticks the needle in my arm and everything fades to black.


	13. Chapter 13

**Eric** **POV**

I run towards Zeke and Shauna's apartment, banging furiously on the door until Shauna answers, coffee cup in hand. One look at my face and she pulls me in.

"What's wrong?" She asks.

"Tris and Peter are gone." I pace. "Fuck!" I run my hands through my hair. "We need to figure this out."

Zeke comes out from the hallway and immediately starts talking. "Where'd they go?"

"To turn Tris in to Evelyn." I reply.

"What the absolute fuck? Peter too? Can we not trust anyone?" Zeke exclaims.

"No, it's not like that. After the meeting earlier, Peter stayed behind and talked about this stupid plan to basically plant himself in with Evelyn, gaining her trust by bringing her most wanted divergent to her. I shut it down, but after what happened with Marlene, Christina and Finn, fuck. I should have known."

"It's not a horrible plan." Zeke says quietly. "With some fine tuning and planning it might have worked well."

"Are you actually saying this right now?" I ask, shaking my head. "It's a stupid plan. She's walked in to what will be her death."

"Did she say anything before you went to sleep? Did she give you any indication of what was going through her head?" Shauna asks.

I sigh and tug on my hair slightly. "Shit. Shit. Shit."

"What?" She asks.

"We didn't talk. We were...well we were distracted. She distracted me." I reply, sinking down on their sofa.

"She knew she was going to leave." Shauna says and I see her glance up at Zeke.

"We're gonna need Edward for this. Shauna, mind staying here while I gather the team?" He asks and Shauna nods. He pulls a shirt on and slips into some shoes before walking out the door.

"Eric, we will find her." Shauna says.

"I should have known. She's so fucking stubborn."

"You needed sleep, were you supposed to stay up all night and watch her like a hawk? You were exhausted. She's not alone, she has Peter with her and you know he has a plan." She replies.

"That's the problem Shauna, their plan is to just let her be Evelyn's lab rat so she's so distracted that we can just swoop in and fuck shit up. That's not how we operate."

"Well we will now." She says with a wicked grin.

"You can't be serious." I reply.

"Deadly serious. With Tris with them now, all of the key players will be in Erudite. Think about it: Evelyn, Four, Caleb and hopefully Peter. Evelyn has her new shiny plaything, there's no way she's going to just leave her there and go back to whatever hole it is that she crawls out of." She replies. "Peter is wicked smart, he's not going to leave her side."

"We take down Evelyn and her trusted advisors and we basically take down the factionless." I reply.

"Exactly." She smiles.

"Simple, and smart." I reply. "It could work."

"It will work, Eric." She replies resolutely.

Zeke walks in with Tori, Edward, Lynn, Uriah and Will.

"Shauna, explain the plan." I say and she nods. She goes over the same information she and I just talked about.

"So we run in and fuck shit up?" Uriah asks while breaking out into a smile.

"It'll need to be a bit more organized than that, but that's pretty much the gist of it." I reply. "The main thing we need to remember is we need to get Tris and Peter out of there unharmed."

"Are we sure Peter is still with us?" Tori asks.

"I can't be sure of a goddamn thing anymore. This shit with Caleb has gotten us all pretty paranoid. Let's go with the assumption Peter is with us. If it's proven otherwise he can get the same execution as Four and Caleb." I reply.

"I think we need more people on the inside. Like how you and Peter were there as guards before." Uriah adds.

"What? No. We don't have time for this. We need to get Tris out of there." I reply.

"We're only talking about a couple of days. We need more than the layout, we need to know what they're doing and where they're doing it. We also need to know where they're keeping Tris. We go in there with guns blazing and we could hurt her." Lynn replies. "Eric you need to think objectively. What would you do if this was anyone other than Tris?"

"Are you questioning my leadership capability?" I yell.

"Eric, man calm the fuck down. No one is questioning your leadership skills. You obviously have feelings for Tris, and those feelings are clouding your judgment. No one else in this room has the balls to stand up to you obviously, but I do. We all care about Tris, and Peter too, but we absolutely cannot go in there without a solid plan. This bitch is even worse than Jeanine. At least with Jeanine you knew exactly what level of psycho you were dealing with, with Evelyn that shit changes like the wind blows." Lynn replies.

Everyone in the room stares at Lynn, it seems as no one was expecting such an outburst and no one knows exactly what to say. Edward finally breaks the awkward silence.

"I agree with Lynn." Edward says. "Evelyn can be a bit unpredictable. It'd be good to have some inside help."

"Lynn's right, and thanks for having those balls you mentioned." I reply with a smirk, looking directly at Lynn and everyone relaxes. "Ok, do we have any volunteers?" I ask.

"It can't be Eric, for obvious reasons." Zeke replies. "So I will volunteer."

"Me too." Tori replies.

"No, you were both seen in Candor by Four during his trial. It needs to be believable. I'll go." Lynn says.

"Me too." Will adds.

"I have to agree with them." Shauna says. "Neither of you were seen in Candor. It could seem like you've been off the radar for awhile.

"When's this going down?" Zeke asks.

"Lynn and Will need to get there tonight." I reply. "We should plan on attacking tomorrow night."

"I think that getting there tonight is a good plan. The quicker we can get there, the better, but I think planning to attack tomorrow may be too soon." Lynn replies.

"With all due respect Eric, I think we need some reports back from Lynn and Will before we plan our attack." Tori says.

"I know enough about the Erudite computer systems to be able to communicate with you Eric. I'll get in contact as soon as possible." Will adds.

"Once we get a report from Will we can plan our attack." Shauna replies. "As much as I love the idea of running in and fucking shit up, I also want to keep our inside people safe and free from harm. Peter needs to be prepared too, and he'll need a way to get Tris out. I'm sure they have her locked up."

"Of course they have her locked up. This is exactly like before." I reply, exasperated.

"Zeke and Uriah, can I task you with getting the troops ready?" Tori asks.

"Absolutely." Zeke grins.

"Ok, Lynn and Will you leave as soon as possible. Will, I don't care what you have to do, but make sure you reach out to me as soon as possible. If we don't hear from either of you in 24 hours we will attack. Zeke and Uri, you'll start to ready the troops later today." I add and receive affirmation from everyone in the room. "Ok, dismissed." I say. I get up to leave and feel a hand on my arm.

"Stay." Shauna says. I sigh as I sink back down onto the sofa.

Zeke soon sits down, bringing us each a bottle of beer. "We're gonna get her back man." He says.

I take a long draw off of my beer and then stare at the bottle, peeling off the label. "She's reckless. I should have known she would do something like this."

"You can't blame youself. Tris is strong, and you know she makes her own decisions without regard to consequences sometimes." Shauna says.

"I let myself get distracted." I reply, shaking my head.

"Eric, you are a twenty year old man with girlfriend who is gorgeous. Tell me any red blooded male who wouldn't have taken that distraction?" Zeke replies.

"I just shouldn't have." I sigh.

"Eric, get your head on straight. It's time for the ruthless asshole you are to come back out. You love that woman, don't you?" Zeke asks.

"Yeah, I do." I reply.

"That's all it takes. You'll get her back." He replies.

"Lynn was right, I'm not thinking clearly because of how I feel about Tris."

"Eric, you're still the same leader you've always been, you just have a lot more at stake now." Shauna replies.

"I'm gonna go grab Uri and get the troops ready. You stay here with Shauna, there's no reason for you to be alone right now." Zeke says.

"No, I'm coming with you. We need to make sure everyone's on the same page and attuned with our plan." I reply, downing the rest of my beer.

"Fuck yeah. There's our leader. Let's roll man." Zeke replies, giving Shauna a quick kiss before we head out the door.

 **Tris POV**

The door to my cell creaks open, but my eyelids feel entirely too heavy. I feel a slight dip on my bed, then a hand on my back. I jump, scooting towards the wall, too afraid to turn around.

"Hey, it's just me. It's ok Tris." Edgar whispers. I slowly turn over to face him.

"What are they doing to me?" I ask, my voice sounding as slurry and as slow as I feel.

"Putting you through different sims is part of their testing. Earlier was just supposed to be a baseline read for you, but whatever they gave you put you into a pretty deep sim." He replies.

"So they saw Peter help rescue me during my sim. And they heard me ask for you. I've fucked everything up." I reply.

"No, actually all of that is fine. They expect you to blur reality in the sims. Haven't you ever had a sim where a person you know and trust is acting completely out of character, or vice versa?" He asks.

"Yes." I whisper, thinking back to when Jeanine had me imprisoned before and Eric would sometimes be my savior, and other times be my killer.

"You did good yesterday, you have some way of figuring out when a sim isn't real." He replies.

"Caleb didn't seem very happy about that." I add.

"Well, of course not. That's exactly what they're trying to prevent you from doing. As long as you keep beating their sims that way, they have to keep returning to the drawing board with their serum development." Edgar replies.

My cell door opens and Peter walks in with a tray of food.

"What the fuck are you doing to her Edgar?" He yells, sitting the tray down and grabbing Edgar by his throat.

"Peter, no!" I yell, trying and failing to stand up. "Peter, please, he's on our side."

Peter looks at me and shoves Edgar backward towards my cot, where he tries to catch his breath, rubbing his throat furiously. I gently run my hand across his head, pushing his hair back. "Deep breaths." I quietly say.

"Tris, what the fuck is going on here?" Peter asks, his eyes traveling over my physical interactions with Edgar. "What are you doing with him? Jesus Tris, what about Eric?"

"Peter, do you know how do run a DNA test?" I ask and his eyebrows shoot up.

"Yeah, it's a simple test, why?" He asks.

"I need you to run one now, can you get whatever you need to collect DNA from two people?"

"I can, but first you're telling me who and why." He replies.

"You sure you trust him?" Edgar asks.

"Yes, he's with me." I reply, and turn my attention to Peter. "It's for Edgar and me. We believe we have the same father." I reply. "He's my brother, Peter."

"Fuck." Peter whispers. "Ok, yeah I'll get into the lab now, I'll be right back." He replies before slipping out the door.

"You don't trust me." Edgar says, turning onto his side so he can face me.

"I do. But, to get Peter's full trust he's going to need to see the proof." I reply.

"He's very protective of you." He says.

"He's a good friend." I reply simply.

"A good friend who led you into what could be your death?" Edgar asks incrediously.

"It's not what you think." I reply.

"Well what exactly is it then? Forgive me for making assumptions, but it appears that no one else knew of this plan for Peter to bring you here. You two are basically here alone without any plans or backup. Are you sure he's as good of a friend as you think?" He asks.

"Ultimately, it was me who decided to leave. I was coming with or without his help." I reply.

"You were coming here blindly to turn yourself in? Are you insane Tris?" He shakes his head almost violently. "What would you do if Tobias and I were like Caleb?"

"Tobias is exactly like Caleb." I reply angrily.

"No, I don't think he is. He's definitely no saint in the shit he's done for Evelyn, but she's tortured him." He replies.

"He had a choice, he came here willingly." I scoff.

"As did you." Edgar says and he must see the surprised look on my face. "You have to think, the only way to find out a divergent is serum resistant is to test almost every known serum on them. He was fucked up for a long time, but he's starting to show a human side again. I don't think he's what you believe him to be." He replies.

"You realize he killed my parents right? _Our father_ Edgar, he killed him in cold blood." I reply.

"I do realize this, and I also have seen who he was when he first starting visiting Evelyn all the way through who he is today. The serums take their toll." He replies with a sigh. "Can you honestly say you're the same person you were before they dosed you with memory serum?"

"You have to understand why I'm afraid." I reply. He nods his head.

"Your ex boyfriend and your idiot brother." He replies and I nod.

Peter walks back in with two oversized cotton swabs and two zipped bags. "Ok, I'll swab each of your cheeks and take this back to the lab to run the tests. We'll have instant results."

Edgar and I sit still while Peter swabs each of our cheeks and seals the swabs in their own separate bags. He leaves the cell reminding us he'd be back soon. Edgar and I talk a bit about our childhoods.

"Which faction did you choose on your choosing day?" I ask.

"I didn't. I ran away from my mother when I was fourteen and chose to live factionless." He replies.

"Why?" I ask.

"I was afraid she was going to kill me once she found out what I am. She had started running tests on me. They test all of the Erudite dependents, they call it practicing for the aptitude tests when in fact it's so she could weed out the divergents." He replies.

"That's horrible." I reply. He nods.

"Evelyn took good care of me at first. She was a lot different before Jeanine and Marcus got to her. She was fair, and very maternal. It was obvious that she missed her son very much and I filled that void. Edward too once he got there. Once Jeanine started filling her head with lies and paranoia about the divergents, Evelyn changed. I always thought she sincerely only wanted the faction system to be gone, and the factionless not to be treated as second rate citizens. But, she's just as power hungry as my mother was." He replies.

"Why'd you stay with her?" I ask.

"Where else was I supposed to go? Once the war started I needed to stay as far away from my mother as possible. I tried to find our father, just to learn he'd been killed at my mother's command. I had nowhere to go. Besides, up until the war started Evelyn seemed good. I tried to go to Amity, because I'd heard they were accepting war refugees, but because I wasn't in any computer system I was turned away. My mother pretty much set out to erase my existence when I ran away." He replies.

Peter comes back into the cell and we both sit up.

"He's a match, he's telling the truth." Peter says, looking amazed. "Did you have any idea?" He asks me.

"Not until Edgar told me earlier." I reply.

"You don't have the same mother, so who's your mother?" Peter asks.

"Sorry, he's rather blunt. Former Candor." I reply and Edgar shrugs.

"It's ok. Look, this needs to stay between us, Evelyn and her group have no idea who my parents are." Edgar replies. "And to answer your question, my mother was Jeanine Matthews."

"Holy fuck." Peter breathes out. "We're seriously going to trust Jeanine Matthews kid?"

"We're going to trust my brother. This one right here." I reply. Peter sighs then nods his head. "I hope you know what you're doing Tris."

"You guys need all the help you can get." Edgar replies. "I only have two family members left, ones a traitor hunting for people like me, and the other is being hunted."

"People like you? You're a divergent too?" He asks.

"Mmhmm." He replies. "Look, as much as I want to stay in here with her, we'd better not raise suspicions."

"Agreed." Peter replies.

Edgar gives me a kiss on the top of my head before heading out with Peter. I lay down on my cot, thinking about everything I've learned since coming here.

I wake up to the sound of my cell door opening and hear arguing. I don't move, pretending to still be asleep to hear the conversation.

"Look, I don't care what happens to her, but I'm pretty sure Evelyn needs her alive for her testing and she has been in bad shape all night. Maybe you should let her rest now that she's finally asleep." Peter says.

"Don't tell me how to do my job Hayes." Tobias answers before letting my cell door slam. My stomach drops as I feel the cot dip from his weight. He doesn't say anything at all, and doesn't touch me. It feels like an eternity that he just sits there, although I'm sure it's just a matter of minutes.

"I know you're awake. I've slept beside you enough to tell." He says. "Besides, you're shaking."

"Please leave me alone, I'm not ready for more." I say quietly, unable to keep my voice from shaking.

"You don't have a choice Tris. You just need to keep staying in long enough for them to think their serum is working better, but also short enough for them to realize it's not perfect. That will keep them busy and you alive." He says. I turn to face him.

"Why do you care if I'm alive Tobias?" I ask, meeting his dark blue eyes.

"You have no reason to trust me, and I'm not going to ask you about whatever it is that you have planned. I'm also not going to let Evelyn turn you into a lab rat. Do you have any clue what serums Jeanine used on you before?" He asks and I continue to just stare at him. What the hell kind of mindfuck is this?

"Is this real?" I ask. This has to be a sim. I look at Tobias and his eyebrows are furrowed and he looks confused by my question.

"This isn't a sim if that's what you're asking." He replies.

"I need to know if this is real." I whisper, while wrapping my arms around myself.

"When they were testing me I could always spot one little thing that was off about the people who showed up in my sims. When I would see you in my sims it was your eyes. Your eyes in the sim never had the flecks of gold they normally have. Think about it, when Jeanine did her testing before, do you remember differences?" He asks.

I think about it quietly. Eric was always in my sims, every single time. Sometimes he was loving, and sometimes he was horrible to me. His hair was always perfectly styled and gelled, his piercings would reflect the light just right. His eyes were sometimes lively and shone with happiness, and sometimes cold and calculating. His lips were soft, and sometimes he'd gently kiss me while other times he'd sneer at me, baring his teeth like a wild animal. It's then that it hits me - his lip ring was always missing, just like it was in the sim earlier today. Tobias just gave me a tip...but why?

"Why are you trying to help me?" I ask.

"Because I regret what I did to you. This is my atonement." He says evenly.

"This definitely must be a sim." I sigh, sitting up on my cot and scooting towards the wall, leaning my back against it.

"Look, when you're in a sim, look for something that's off. If there are people in the sim interacting with you, there will be something physical that's different. If you're in a place alone, something will be off. That's how you and I are wired, our minds make sure we know reality from fantasy, but you have to know what to look for. They tested me for months, over and over. It was awful." He shakes his head.

"Why'd you let her?" I ask.

"Because I thought she might be the only person in my life who truly loves me." He replies.

I study his face carefully, looking for any sign this is a sim. He looks almost exactly like I remember, except his hair is longer and curling at the ends and he has a light beard.

"You have a beard." I say. He chuckles.

"Good observation, but this isn't a sim tell, this is laziness. I don't really have any reason to shave anymore." He shrugs, rubbing the beard with his hand.

"I don't trust you." I say flatly.

"I don't blame you. I am going to just say this, because it needs to be said and you are literally a captive audience right now. I was wrong, terribly and irrevocably wrong. I should have never trusted Evelyn. I shouldn't have lied to you, and I should have never allowed myself to be put into a position where I had to kill people to save myself. Jeanine knew I was a serum resistant divergent, and the only way to keep myself alive was to be useful to her. So, I followed her every order. What I did to you, and your parents Tris, I'm truly sorry. I should have let Jeanine kill me." He says. I feel tears in my eyes and I try to scrub them away with the heels of my hands.

"You're the second person in my life to feel that way." I reply quietly. "Only you made the wrong decisions."

He nods. "You're absolutely right. I wasn't strong enough to make the right moves, and I will always regret it."

"What is Edgar's deal?" I ask tentatively.

"I know he's your brother, I'm alerted each time a test is run. Edgar and Peter don't realize that, but don't worry I'm the only one who gets the alerts. Based on your sim earlier you know that he's your brother too." He replies. I start to shake again. "I also know Peter is helping you, along with Lynn and Will I assume. They're the two who showed up claiming to want to join Evelyn's cause."

"I don't know what you're talking about." I reply, keeping my voice as even as possible.

"Look, you're going to be able to get away with blurring reality in your sims, Caleb and Evelyn are looking for that, so it's actually a good thing that these 'odd' events happen in your sims. You forget that I am exactly like you, so I know exactly what your reality is in your sims." He replies. "As for Edgar, he was just as loyal to Evelyn as I was before she decided that Jeanine's vendetta against divergents was something she wanted to continue. I suspect he's divergent too." He replies.

"You keep speaking of loyalty in the past tense. It's a really nice try to convince me that you've finally grown a conscious, but it's not going to work." I reply. Being nice to him is exhausting, and I'm really ready for him to be out of my cell. He looks at me, studying me for a long time before he speaks again.

"A lot of the things I did weren't always reality in my mind. I may be resistant to serums, but the lines between the sims I was constantly being put through and actual reality were blurred, and I'm sure that's something you are familiar with too. There are things I did that I _now_ remember doing, but I didn't know how or why I did them at the time. Also, just because I have a resistance to a certain serum, it doesn't always stop the serum from working, at least partially. Didn't the memory serum at least partially affect you?" He asks.

I think about what he's just said and it does make sense. I have a lot of blanks in my memory, and my treatment of Eric that day in Abnegation is an example of how my mind was playing tricks on me. At that moment, I had no knowledge of the wrongdoings of Tobias, and he was who I desperately wanted. Just the same way I felt about Caleb, I didn't remember Caleb was part of Jeanine's plans until it was too late and he'd already completely infiltrated Eric's group. I am brought out of my thoughts by Tobias speaking again.

"I'm not telling you any of this with any expectation of ever getting your forgiveness or love." He carefully says.

"That's good, considering I'd never give you either." I reply. "I love Eric, and if that ends up getting me tortured or killed, so be it. I won't deny my feelings for him in order to appease you or anyone else, and I'd give up my own life to protect his."

"I know." He replies. We sit in comfortable silence until Peter approaches, unlocking the door before opening it.

"Hey Four." Peter says, glancing briefly to me.

"Peter." He replies. "I forgot to mention, it was really nice of you to bring Tris to the party. You finally decide that life under Eric's thumb isn't all it's made out to be?"

"Something like that." Peter chuckles. "He was wasting my talents. I was practically his second in command and he didn't even think to make me a leader."

Tobias studies Peter's face the same way he previously studied mine. Peter shifts his weight from foot to foot, but doesn't betray any other emotions. Tobias stands to leave, then turns to face Peter.

"I'm going to tell you the same thing I just told her, I know you all are up to something, and whatever it is I won't stop it. I also won't let her be turned into a lab rat. If either of you _ever_ thought of trusting me, now's the time to start." He says evenly.

Peter keeps his poker face, keeping his reactions even and his emotions hidden. He and Tobias hold each other's stares for a few moments before Peter speaks again.

"Your mother wants to see you. Something about the new people." Peter replies.

"I'm going to make sure she trusts Lynn and Will." Tobias replies looking at us both. "I'll check back in later. Think about what I said." With that, he walks out of the cell, letting the door slam behind him.

"Are you ok?" Peter asks, helping me up and examining me for injuries.

"I'm fine, he never touched me." I reply.

"What was that about?" He asks.

"He's trying to convince me that he's not loyal to Evelyn." I reply. He shakes his head.

"It's gotta be a trap. You didn't say anything, did you?"

"Of course not!" I reply angrily and Peter's expression softens.

"Do you really trust Edgar?" He asks.

"For some reason, yes I do. Does that make me a fool?" I sigh.

"That's a loaded question." He smirks. "All kidding aside, he seems decent. I'm obviously not as good of a Candor as Chris is, so I can't really tell if he's lying or not. I just hope when the shit hits the fan we have people on our side."

"Have you talked to Lynn or Will?" I ask.

"Not without Evelyn there, she's not let them out of her office yet. I will as soon as the coast is clear." He replies. "You really should eat, they're preparing the lab again to start more testing soon." He says, worry evident in his features.

"Do you know what the sims are going to be this time?" I ask.

"I have no idea how many sims they'll put you through until she's satisfied that you're ready for the next serum." He sighs. "I hope Eric's here before it gets to that stage."

"What's that stage Peter?" I ask.

"Memory serum, except a mutated version of it." He replies.

"The stuff that killed the other divergents?" I ask. He nods his head.

"I'm not going to let them get that far. I'll figure it out Tris." He replies. He stands to leave and I put my arm out to stop him.

"Please stay." I say and he sits back down. We sit side by side on the cot, backs against the wall.

"I can't stay in here too long. I don't want to raise her suspicions." He says, grabbing my hand and squeezing it gently and rubbing his free hand over our entwined ones. "Eric's coming for you, he loves you. He's already sent Will and Lynn. They're being vetted right now."

"Do you think Tobias was telling the truth? That he's going to help make sure Evelyn trusts all of you?" I ask.

Peter sighs heavily. "We haven't been able to trust him so far. Him being suspicious of us is worrying me." He replies. "I'm going to figure it out though."

The cell door opens and Tobias steps in again, before Peter can get away from me. "Will and Lynn are in. Peter, you're lucky it's just me this time, if Caleb or Evelyn comes in and finds you in her cell looking all cozy your plan is fucked and you guarantee both of your deaths." He says. "You need to tighten up. Tris, Caleb's ready for you. Remember everything I told you earlier, ok?" He asks and I nod tersely.

He grabs his handcuffs off of his belt and brings my hands in front of me, cuffing them. I take a chance and ask him a question.

"Do you know what he's giving me this time?" I ask.

"You reacted oddly to the baseline serum before. The first sim was the typical result, something that was made to obviously not be real. The second sim was completely unexpected. Whatever he gives you today will likely make you react the same way the second sim did. Remember what I told you, look for your tells, but try to keep the sim going for awhile. If you're too fast, Evelyn will eventually get frustrated with you." He replies as he leads me out of the cell.

"What if you show up in my sim as trying to help me." I ask quietly.

"They'll think the serum is working then. Remember what I told you - they expect you to be blurring reality in your sims." He whispers. We walk in silence until reaching the glass room again, where Tobias and Peter get me cuffed to the chair and the leads attached to me. They leave the room and I glare at Caleb through the glass. I watch as he hands Tobias a syringe. Once the door opens and Tobias walks back in, my nerves kick in and I start to panic.

"Similar to yesterday." He whispers as he moves my hair away from my neck. "Be brave."

That's the last thing I hear before the room fades away.


	14. Chapter 14

Eric POV

Zeke and I are going over the plans with the last group of soldiers when Edward and Shauna approach me.

"There's a disturbance at the southeast gate. Someone showed up asking for you and me specifically." Edward says. "The guards are holding him, but he refuses to identify himself."

"I'll take over here, you two should head out." Shauna replies while gesturing at us to go.

Edward and I start walking towards the door, I glance over and he looks nervous. "Who do you think it is?" I ask.

"I'm not sure." He replies. We jog to the outside entrance and then make our way over to the southeast gate. We see Jimmy and Anton, two of our best guards, step out with a man between them, hands cuffed in front of him.

"Edgar." Edward says from beside me.

As we approach, Jimmy gives us a report. "He won't identify himself, he's unarmed and he asked to speak with the two of you. He said it was important. We've frisked him and he's clean." Jimmy says.

The man looks extremely familiar. "What's your name?" I ask him.

"Edgar. But you may remember me as Andy." He replies.

"Andy Matthews?" I ask, raising my eyebrows in surprise.

"Yeah. I use my middle name now. I wanted to let you know Tris is ok." He says.

"Where is she?" I ask, feeling anxious.

"Erudite. Peter is with her, and Will and Lynn just arrived too. Evelyn already vetted Peter, but when I left Tobias was working on allowing Will and Lynn to stay." He replies.

"What do you mean Tobias was working on it?" Edward asks.

"He's not as much of a dick as we thought. He's sick of Evelyn's bullshit too." Edgar replies.

"Why should we trust you? You're one of her closest followers." I reply, studying him.

"So was he." He nods at Edward. "Evelyn was a different person before Jeanine. Besides, I will protect my sister at all costs. She's the only family I have left, besides Caleb, and he's a fucking monster." Edgar replies.

" _Your sister?_ " I ask. I can see Edward is just as shocked as I am.

"Yes, my father was Andrew Prior. Tris is my sister." He replies, he continues after seeing our reactions. "We ran two separate DNA tests, I ran one myself against Caleb and Peter ran one earlier against Tris, we're a match."

"So who's to say you're not loyal to your _brother_." I growl.

"My _brother_ as you call him is hunting people like Tris and me. I'm not serum resistant like she is, but I'm divergent too." He lifts his cuffed hands to reach into his pocket and I grab my pistol. "I'm unarmed, look you can get it. There's some folded pieces of paper inside my jacket pocket. It's about Tris." He says.

I reach inside of his pocket and find the papers. I unfold them and it takes everything I have to not break down. It's several printouts, one is a DNA test ran today that shows the family match between Edgar and Tris. Another is a record of the serums and testing they've done on Tris so far. I fold the paper up and place it in my pocket.

"Come with us. I need you to tell us everything you know." I reply as I unlock his cuffs.

We lead Edgar inside the compound and bring him to my office. "Edward, can you get whichever leaders are in their offices?" He nods and walks away.

"Want anything to drink or eat?" I ask.

"No, I'm good. Thanks though." He replies.

"I thought you were dead. Your mother told everyone you'd been hit by the train. They had a funeral for you." I tell him and see him nodding.

"Ran away at fourteen, before she could figure out I was divergent. It didn't seem to matter to her who she used as her test subjects. I watched way too many kids die being her lab rats." He replies with a shudder.

Edward walks in with Tori, Zeke and Shauna. "This is everybody." He replied. He's about to leave the office when I gesture for him to join us.

"Tori, Zeke, Shauna this is Edgar. Edgar, these are the other Dauntless leaders. Your sister is our last leader." I make the introductions.

"His sister? Edgar as in Evelyn's right hand?" Zeke says with a scowl.

"What's going on here?" Shauna asks.

"Edgar's father was Andrew Prior." I state. "They've ran DNA tests to prove that he is a half sibling to Tris and Caleb."

"Which sibling are you loyal to, that's my question." Tori asks, narrowing her eyes and glaring at Edgar.

"My sister, only her. Caleb has no idea who I am. Evelyn has no idea who my parents are, or that I'm divergent. If she knew any of these things, she would have used me against Jeanine a long time ago." He replies.

"Other than you being divergent, what use would you have been to Jeanine?" Shauna asks.

"She was my mother." Edgar replies.

"Fuck me." Zeke says, shaking his head. "This gets more twisted by the second."

I take out the paperwork Edgar gave me and hand it to Tori. "This is the DNA test, and also the results of Tris' testing thus far." I say. "It says she had an unusual reaction to this baseline serum they tested on her. What does that mean?" I ask Edgar.

"She was given what they use as a baseline serum. It's low dose, designed to make the person who's in the sim aware that the activities they're seeing aren't real. Tris' started that way, she reacted as they'd expected at first, recognizing the scene wasn't real. What was highly unusual was that she somehow morphed that into a very realistic sim, depicting a rescue mission. It was the type of sim that a higher dosage of the serum usually triggers, and even the strongest divergents have a hard time recognizing that it's not real. She found a way to do that with the sim, and it was within minutes." He replied.

"What's that mean for her?" Tori asks.

"If she doesn't find a way to straddle the line between making them think their serum is improving, while letting them know it's still not perfect they will get frustrated. Frustration means skipping straight to the serums that were killing the divergents that Jeanine was testing on." He replies.

"How long does she have?" I ask.

"I'm not sure. Evelyn has Caleb, Tobias and me testing her. At least two of us are trying to keep her alive." He replies.

"Two of you?" Shauna asks while scrunching her face.

"I think Tobias, or Four as you call him, is done with Evelyn. She turned him into a lab rat, he's not been himself for a long fucking time. He's gotten progressively better since she finally stopped testing on him." He replies.

"I don't trust him." I say. "So for now the only people we count on inside are Peter, Will, Lynn, Tris and you." I gesture to Edgar.

"Eric, are you nuts?" Zeke exclaims. "Look I'm sorry for the outburst but this dude is going to slide in here and get immediate trust?"

"Tris trusts him, therefore I am going to as well. Edgar, what are they doing to her now?" I ask.

"When I left Tobias and Peter were escorting her to the lab for Caleb to run more tests. I know you don't trust the man, but he did get Evelyn to sign off on letting Will and Lynn guard Tris." He replies.

"Does he know what we're doing?" Tori asks.

"Tris and Peter have denied it to him, and he hasn't said a word to Caleb or me about it. He knows she's my sister though, apparently he receives alerts when lab testing is done. He suspects that they're planning something and he's told them both he won't stop them." Edgar replies.

"I just can't trust him." Zeke replies, shaking his head. "The dude tried to have Tris killed how many times now? We need to expedite this plan."

"I'm not going to let anything happen to her. Neither will Peter, she trusts him too. You don't need to tell me what you're organizing here, unless you want to. Just know when you all come storming in I'm on your side. You have my word." Edgar replies.

"I trust him." Edward replies. "He's had my back since I failed out of initiation.

"You both need to understand that if you prove to be loyal to us you will have a home here in Dauntless." I reply, causing the other leaders to look at me questioningly. "Do you have any arguments against that?" I ask the leaders.

"No, I think it's very fair. I'm just surprised, that's all." Tori replies. Zeke and Shauna nod in agreement.

"I really should get back. I can pretty much come and go as I please, but Evelyn is quite paranoid since losing Edward. Is there anything you want from me?" He asks.

I grab a paper and pen, tuning the other leaders out for a moment. I write a note for Tris, fold it and hand it to Edgar.

"Make sure she gets this." I say quietly and he nods. "Keep her safe, that's all I ask. You have to understand our reluctance to trust anyone at this point."

"I do." He nods and heads out the door.

I have Edward walk Edgar out of the compound while Shauna, Zeke and I brainstorm. We haven't yet heard from Will, but based on what Edgar has told us it seems like we should be hearing something soon since Evelyn has trusted them to work with her.

"We plan for tomorrow night." Zeke states.

"I don't see how we have any other choice. Tris can string them along to a certain extent, but if they don't get what they need from her she becomes as expendable as the rest of the divergents." Shauna replies.

"This isn't a one woman mission. The bigger picture is still bringing Evelyn's little factionless kingdom down. We need to focus on that." I reply.

"Your girlfriend sure forced our hand though." Tori sighs.

"I'm well aware. She's still my priority, but I'm not going to lose focus on the bigger picture. I'd like to bring Evelyn in alive if possible. As much as I hate Jack Kang, it'll save a lot of hassles if we can get the key players in for trials." I add.

"So Evelyn, Caleb and Four are on the capture list?" Zeke asks.

"Yes." I agree.

"What about Marcus Eaton?" Shauna asks.

"According to Four, he's dead. I have no idea how true that is." I state. "I'll reach out to Johanna to see if she can check their database for an update on his status. I'm also going to see if we can get access to this database as well."

"George and Amar can help with keeping communications with Amity open as well." Tori offers.

"Ok, Zeke, let's get Uriah and inform the troops." I say.

"Marlene and Chris are already itching to fight, they've been medically cleared." Shauna adds.

"The more, the merrier. Let's go get ready."

 **Tris POV**

I'm exhausted. I can feel the fresh blood dripping from my nose. My head is pounding like I've spent the entire day drinking. My eyes are blurry and I feel completely out of sorts as Peter supports most of my weight while practically dragging me back to my cell.

"Tris, we're almost there. Just hang on ok?" He says.

"Mmhmm." I hum, feeling my head drooping.

"What the hell happened to her?" I hear a female voice for the first time. Maybe Lynn?

"Will, can you get something together so we can get her cleaned up?" Peter asks.

I feel extra support as I'm carried into my cell and placed on my cot.

"Caleb pushed too far. It was fucking awful. She got stuck in a sim, she was pleading with Eric for her life. It was vicious, he was beating the shit out of her and she wouldn't fight him back. She let him torture her in the sim, to the point where she actually started panicking. We watched him kill her because she's divergent." Peter replies.

"Why the fuck wouldn't she fight back? She realizes she's in a sim, right?" Lynn asks.

I hear them talking but can't participate in the conversation. I feel like I'm dying.

"She does. I'm not sure why she let it happen, and she's too out of it to tell us." Another voice, this one sounds like Tobias. "You guys really need to be careful with how loud you talk. The cameras might still be disabled, but Evelyn has ears everywhere."

"It was just a general observation Four. Quit playing into whatever conspiracy theory you've dreamed up." Lynn barks.

"Who the hell do you think got her out of that sim?" Tobias whispers. "She gave up, she was letting him kill her. I had to manually stop it."

"Won't that alert Caleb?" Peter asks.

"I made it look like an issue with the mainframe. He may figure it out, but it bought us enough time to get her out of there until the issue is fixed. She wouldn't have survived much more of that sim. You can believe what you want about me, but I'm not letting them kill her." Tobias replies.

I feel something warm wiping my face. It feels heavenly. I open my eyes and see Lynn.

"Thank you." I whisper.

"You ok?" She asks.

"Mmhmm." I reply. "Water?"

"I'll get her some." I hear Will reply.

"Tris, why didn't you fight back?" Tobias asks me, slightly bending over so he can look at me.

"It was real." I whisper and feel tears begin to fall. "I couldn't kill him, I love him."

"Tris, you were in a sim. You were stuck in it, for almost an hour. Why didn't you look for a tell?" Tobias asks.

I open my eyes and look at Lynn. She's sitting on the side of my bed, carefully washing the dried blood off of my face. Tobias is looking down at me from his standing position. I turn my head and glance at Peter, who is standing at the end of my bed with his arms crossed. I look back at Tobias and try to focus.

"Where's your beard?" I ask.

"Seriously Tris? You let youself almost die in a sim and you're asking him about his grooming habits?" Lynn scoffs.

"This isn't real." I reply. I reach out for Lynn and she flinches.

"What is she talking about?" Lynn asks, looking at Peter. I watch as he shakes his head.

"They're fucking with her head royally." He replies.

Will walks back in and brings me water. He and Lynn help me to sit up. The water is ice cold, and it feels amazing going down.

"Sit." I say to Tobias, patting the bed next to me. He complies, sitting next to me, turned in slightly so he can face me. I reach out and touch his cheek, which is smooth to the touch. His skin is soft, and warm.

"You're part of the sim." I whisper to him.

"This again?" He asks me. "Tris, come on now." He shakes his head.

"You aren't real, none of you." I say, looking around the room at the incredulous expressions on their faces.

I hand my water to Lynn and put both of my hands on Tobias' cheeks. He closes his eyes and leans in to my touch.

"You're too lazy to have shaved, remember?" His navy blue eyes bore into mine. I gently run my fingers across his impossibly soft skin and he closes his eyes and sighs. "Thank you. I'm working on trusting you again." I whisper just loud enough for him to hear me. He leans his forehead to mine.

"Tris..." He whispers, closing the small distance between us and ghosting his lips to mine. He slowly starts to disappear as I watch my cell fade away and see the bright sterile lights of this glass hell hole reappear.

"If you're trying to kill her, you're almost succeeding." I hear Peter flippantly say to someone, chuckling lightly.

"Beatrice, how are you doing this?" Caleb asks from his spot by the computer station. I don't answer. "You're manipulating the sims, and yet somehow you're still figuring them out." He shakes his head. "I don't know how Evelyn is going to feel about today's results."

"It's getting better." This deep voice belongs to Tobias. "She let Eric kill her in the first sim. We're closer to what my mother wants."

I glance over at Tobias and his beard is back. Ok, good, maybe I'm awake?

"We need to put her back in, perhaps a higher dosage this time." Caleb says. I feel like I should argue, but I'm so damn tired.

"Really man? I'm not joking, she looks half dead. Maybe a small break before you start the next session." Peter says. He sounds so far away...

"She's done for the night." Tobias says.

"She's not done until I say she's done." A female voice...not Lynn...

"Finally, a voice of reason. To what do I owe the pleasure Evelyn?" Caleb says. I hate him. Fucking hate.

"Just checking in on my favorite test subject. How is Beatrice doing?" She asks.

"Getting closer mother. She didn't fight her first sim at all. She actually let Eric beat her to death. She's still able to manipulate the sims though. But, this was progress." Tobias replies.

"Four and I were just about to take her back to her cell. She's looking pretty ragged." Peter replies.

"Caleb, do you think it's wise to stop now? It seems like Beatrice is close to a breakthrough." Evelyn replies.

"I think we should proceed." He replies. "If she gets too unstable, we can stop the sim."

"Good, carry on then. Tobias, don't let any lingering feelings for Beatrice blind you from the goals. You are a smart boy, and I adore you. This little girl is only worth the divergence she carries. Don't forget that." Evelyn kisses Tobias on his cheek before walking out of the room.

"I'm going to increase the serum by twenty percent. It may be wise for us to start an IV for the next session so that we can gradually increase her dosage as needed. If we dose her again once she starts to figure out the sim, maybe we could prevent her from figuring it out." Caleb says.

I can see a look of pure terror flash across Peter's face. He's a master of keeping his emotions in check, but anyone who knows him well can read him. If Peter is scared, I'm terrified.

"No, there will be no IV without approval. If you want to put her in another sim do it now, I'll speak with my mother about your suggestion if you'd like." Tobias replies.

"I can speak with Evelyn myself thank you. Here, get her injected." Caleb says, irritation obvious in his tone.

"Careful. I still outrank you Caleb." Tobias growls. I watch as he snatches the syringe from Caleb and comes to unlock the door to the glass room.

"I can't." I breathe out.

"I'm sorry. I won't let anything happen." He whispers quietly as he injects me again. I feel the tears slowly leaking from the corners of my eyes as I drift off again.

I can feel myself being carried and as much as I try to open my eyes they just won't budge. The muffled voices that are all around me confuse me. I can feel myself slipping in and out of consciousness.

"...he's not going to stop until she's dead."

"How long is this plan of yours going to take, she can't..."

"Tris, wake up..."

"...does anyone here have medical training..."

"She's breathing, it's just shallow..."

I feel myself being lowered and I panic, grasping at the clothing of the person who's holding me.

"Shhh, it's ok Tris, I've got you." I know this voice. Think Tris.

Internally I'm screaming. Yelling until I'm hoarse and my throat is raw. Get me out of here.

"Is there any way we can reverse whatever she's going through right now?" Female voice. Not Evelyn.

"Just lay down with her."

I'm clutching onto someone as we're both lowered onto what feels like a bed. I can hear his heartbeat and feel his warmth.

"God I wish we could get her to stop screaming..."

They can hear me? Concentrate Tris, you can beat this. I open my eyes.

I'm back in my cell, I can see Lynn standing at the foot of my bed. I'm pressed against someone and arms are tightly wrapped around me. I can't move...

"Shhh, it's ok. Stop screaming. It's just me, I've got you."

"Eric?" I croak out, my voice thick with tears.

"It's Peter. Tris, just take some deep breaths." He soothes.

"Is this real?" I sob. He pulls me tighter. "I need Eric."

"Lynn, Will, I need you both out here. If Evelyn comes by you do whatever it takes to distract her from this cell. We're going to need warning. She can't find us this way." Tobias' authoritative voice rings out. "Peter, as much as I hate to do this, you've got to get out. If she finds you in here your cover is blown."

"No!" I scream, clutching onto his arms.

"I'm not leaving her. They'll warn us." Peter growls.

"Fine, I'm going to stand here to block the window." Tobias sighs.

"I need to see you, I need to know if this is real." I say. Peter loosens his grip on me and I turn so I can face him. He looks the same as he did earlier, his green eyes alert, his dark almost black hair slightly messy and curling away from his face. He has a five o'clock shadow, and shadows under his eyes.

I look at Tobias and his beard is in place. Glancing around the room, nothing unusual catches my eye.

"Where's Eric?" I ask. "Eric is in all of my sims. Where is he?"

"This isn't a sim, Tris, this is real." Tobias answers.

"No, you injected me." I reply. "Why do you look so normal!?" I yell.

"Tris, you have to calm down for fucks sake. Do you want to get Evelyn in here? This is real, you have to calm down." Peter says, looking me straight in the eyes. "Four's right, I can't stay in here too long. I need you to focus."

"Clear out." Will calls through the meal slot on the door. Peter and Tobias quickly leave the cell, leaving me alone with my frenzied thoughts. I hear commotion outside my door, and I jump up to look out the dirty window of my cell door. I watch as another prisoner is dragged into the rounded room. It appears to be an unconscious man, but the angle is wrong for me to make out any features. The man is large and dressed in Dauntless black. They are struggling to drag him into a cell across the room from me, I watch as they enlist Peter and Four's help. The man's head limply falls back. That's when I see the leadership tattoos on his neck.

"Eric!" I scream, pounding on my door. "Eric!" I sob, watching as they drag him completely in and slam the cell door behind him. Peter locks eyes with me and the panicked look he briefly exhibited before is now out in plain view. "You have to let me see him. Please." I cry out, hitting the thick door with closed fists. I watch as my knuckles start to crack and bleed. I can see everyone talking, but I can't hear any words. What is happening? Why is Eric here and unconscious? Why is Peter panicking?

Tobias approaches my cell and I watch as he places his hand on the scanner to unlock my door. I immediately try to sprint out the door, but his strong hands grab me to stop me.

"Stop. I'm going to take you to him." He calmly says. He keeps a firm grip on my arm while he walks me across the room and unlocks Eric's cell door using the hand scanner. He shoves me inside the cell and quickly closes the door behind him, leaving Eric and I in the cell alone.

They managed to get Eric onto the small cot. His breathing is slow and deep, and he appears to be calm. I look him over and find that his piercings are all in place, his tattoos all the same and his features are normal. I reach out and run my fingertips across his lips, feeling their warmth contrasting against his cold piercing. The lip ring is back. This is real?

"Eric, can you hear me?" I ask as I run my hands through his messy hair. "What did they do to you?" I whisper as my tears begin to slowly fall. I press my lips to his temple.

He stirs a bit and then jerks awake, sitting up suddenly. His eyes dart around the room before finally settling on me. He looks blank.

"You." He growls. Before I can react he has thrown me on my back and is straddling me. He has his complete weight on my hips and his hands around my throat. I try to scream but no noise comes out. I punch him as hard as I can with my fists and try to buck my hips unsuccessfully. I'm starting to see black dots cloud my vision.

Suddenly, he's torn away from me and I am gasping for air, unable to fully catch my breath. I can hear shouting, and the sounds of fighting and struggling. I hear a gunshot, the noise deafening and causes my ears to ring. Tobias' face is looking down at mine and I see his mouth moving to form words but I can't hear them. I try to sit up but he shakes his head.

"You don't want to see this..." I hear his voice slightly over the loud ringing.

"Where is he?" I scream, I punch at Tobias trying to move him out of my way. I glance at Peter, he looks completely mortified, he is shakily holding a gun and looking down. I follow his line of site and see Eric crumpled on the floor, a large pool of blood gathering under him.

"No!" I scream, launching myself away from Tobias and towards Eric. The blood is all from a gunshot wound to his chest. "We need to help him!" I yell.

"He's gone Tris." Will says from the doorway. I watch as Lynn cautiously approaches Peter and gently removes the pistol from his shaking hand.

"He was going to kill her..." Peter murmurs.

"You killed him!" I scream at Peter, my sobs ripping through me as I frantically search Eric for a pulse. I start ripping the front of his shirt open, exposing a deep and gruesome bullet wound that is no longer seeping blood. His blood is no longer flowing. His heart has stopped. "Nooooo. Nooooooo. Not you. Why did you come here? Why? I love you, please no." I sob loudly as Tobias attempts to pull me away from Eric's body. I look at the man I love, dead because I foolishly followed Peter into this mission. I bend over to kiss his lips one last time and as I pull away I can't stop staring at the gaping hole in his chest.

He has no nipple rings.

"This isn't real!" I scream. "Get me out of here, this isn't fucking real!" I look at Eric's face and run my fingers through his messy hair. "You are fine. This isn't real. I love you so much. This isn't real." I bend over his body and sob, pressing my forehead to his until he slowly starts to fade away.

I wake up screaming, handcuffed to the chair with Tobias rushing into the room. "She's done for the day!" He yells, presumably at Caleb.

"That was a much better result, it took her almost two hours." Caleb says.

"I fucking hate you!" I scream at him. He smiles at me.

"Evelyn will be pleased with these results." He continues to smile, a look of almost awe on his face.

"We're taking her to her cell." Tobias replies. I feel the handcuffs being unlocked from the chair and I'm being lifted by strong arms. "I'm calling it, my mother wants her alive and I feel like you're willing to let her die just to prove your serum is working. Stop being selfish."

"If I didn't know any better, I'd think you were still in love with my little sister Four." Caleb replies.

"Don't. My job is to keep her alive for testing. You need to remember who's in charge here." He growls.

A feeling of deja vu passes over me as I'm carried through hallways back to my cell. I am more aware of my surroundings than before, and I realize that it's Tobias carrying me this time. I listen as he talks to Peter.

"Whatever you're planning needs to happen soon. They're going to kill her if they keep increasing the dosage. You need to get her out of here." He says quietly to Peter. I'm being lowered onto my bed, this time I reach out and clutch Tobias' shirt. He looks down at me with surprise, but he allows me to pull him down next to me until we're laying together with me clutched onto his chest.

"Who's responsible for reaching out to Eric?" Tobias asks. I hear no one answering. "Dammit, answer me. They're going to fucking kill her." He seethes.

"I am." Will replies.

"Find Edgar. He can get you into the server room and give you access to secure messaging. Are you familiar with the encryption they use here?" Tobias asks Will.

"Yes." He replies.

"Good, get the message out to Eric. Let him know this needs to happen now." Tobias commands.

"No way. You're setting us up for a fucking ambush." Peter interjects.

"I told you to trust me, fucking do it. You want Evelyn brought down? I can do it. But, if you sit around and keep trying to form the perfect plan she's going to die. Caleb is willing to kill her for the sake of proving his fucking serum, Peter you saw that youself today. Make up your fucking mind. Either get him here or I leave and take her with me, and you can explain to her boyfriend why she's gone. Decide." Tobias replies angrily.

"Will, go." Peter replies and Will quickly leaves the room. He returns his focus to Tobias. "If this is a set up I will put the bullet in your head myself."


	15. Chapter 15

Tris POV

 _Flashback_

 _I wake up strapped to a chair, in a room with glass walls, at least I think I'm awake. I don't know how long I've been here, days seem to be blending together. I look through the glass and see Caleb typing away on a computer, while Jeanine Matthews watches over his shoulder._

 _"The way her mind works is facinating, but she's proof that the divergents need to be destroyed." Jeanine says while she taps her fingers on the screen of her tablet. "Have we compared her results to Tobias Eaton's?"_

 _"Yes, if you look here you'll notice her recognition times are on par with his for the first several sims, however this is where they vary greatly. When we increased Tobias' serum, it caused him to eventually be lost in the sim, look here you'll see exactly when he stopped being able to manipulate the simulations." I watch as Caleb gestures to something on his computer monitor._

 _"I wish that Evelyn would consider letting us continue testing on Tobias. He and Beatrice are the best subjects we've seen." Jeanine sighs._

 _"Well, I have continued running mind control sims on him. Remember the implant?" Caleb replies and Jeanine nods. "I've been able to fine tune the mind control software and paired it with the implant. He's been an almost perfect soldier, and has had no idea."_

 _"You mean you finally discovered a way to truly control the divergent mind?" Jeanine asks._

 _"It's almost there. There have been moments where he seems to be able to block the effects of the implant, but for the most part I've been able to program him. I was easily able to get him to capture Tris and bring her here instead of to Evelyn." He replies._

 _"Is the implant somewhere that he will find it?" Jeanine asks._

 _"No, it's minuscule. It blended right in with his tattoos." Caleb replies. "I'd been hoping he was one of those pierced up Dauntless like Eric. We could have just made it look like another piercing if he was. Either way, I don't see him ever finding it."_ _Caleb glances over his shoulder at me. "She looks lucid." He remarks._

 _Jeanine turns towards me, walking to the glass wall until she can tap her fingers against it. "Can she hear me?" Jeanine asks._

 _"Yes I can fucking hear you bitch." I spit._

 _"Well you woke up feisty today." Jeanine smirks. "Tell me, do you know who I am?"_

 _"Let me out of this fucking room and I'll show you how much I know who you are." I yell. "Caleb, let me out of here. You're my brother! Please, let me out of here."_

 _Jeanine looks me in the eyes as she speaks, "Caleb, I believe it's time we dose Beatrice with the improved memory serum." She smiles at me._

 _"Yes, right away." Caleb replies as he hurriedly prepares a syringe._

 _"Beatrice, you are quite the interesting subject compared to Tobias Eaton. Did you know you showed up in every simulation we ran on Tobias?" Jeanine asks with a fake enthusiasm. She doesn't wait for an answer before continuing, "When we first tested you, he was in yours too, but what's facinating is that one of my most loyal followers is the star of your simulations. Do you want to tell me why Eric Coulter is showing up as your little hero now? Has the very person I've entrusted with guarding you been pursuaded by your feminine charms?"_

 _"Fuck you Jeanine!" I scream. She chuckles._

 _"Hit a nerve, hmm? Well, don't worry Beatrice, as soon as Caleb has finished wiping your memory I'm going to have a little chat with your dear friend Eric. I hope whatever the two of you have been up to was worth his pathetic life." Jeanine sneers. "Wipe her." She commands to Caleb._

 _I watch as my brother unlocks the door to this glass room. "Caleb, please don't do this. Please. I love you." I beg._

 _Caleb walks over to a panel and presses several buttons. "Jeanine doesn't need to hear this part._ _You are an abomination. People like you are the problem with our society." He replies as he moves my hair to expose my neck._

 _"Caleb, you can't believe that. You're my brother, please Caleb." I beg. I watch his eyes shift and his hands stop moving._

 _"That little plan of Eric's is over. It's a shame, really. You ruined Eric. He was brilliant, and he could have been right next to Jeanine when she finally takes over the government._ _It's been interesting watching the two of you interact, but my observations have proven that his feelings for you have weakened him._ _I've held my cards to my chest, buying my time until I knew when it was time to finally expose them. I'm truly going to love being the one who finally rids our society of divergents. Do you understand what that will mean for me? I'm going to be right by Jeanine's side." He says._

 _"What are you going to do to him?" I ask._

 _"When the time is right, I'm going to kill him."_

 _"No, Caleb please don't hurt him. This isn't you. You're not a murderer." I reply as my tears finally fall._

 _"You never knew me at all. Goodbye Beatrice, this time it's truly over for you." He replies as he quickly sticks the needle into my neck, and my world once again goes black._

 _End Flashback_

I wake up sweating and gasping for air. This memory was so much different than before. I've only had one other memory about my previous time at Erudite and I'd believed that I'd never remember anything that happened to me outside of the moment of lucidity inside of my cell with Peter and Eric.

Then it dawns on me - Tobias has some sort of implant. I jump up from my cot and begin banging on my window to get someone's attention. I see Edgar turn towards me and quickly get up from the desk he'd been sitting at. He unlocks my cell and steps inside.

"Hey, you're awake." He smiles. "How are you feeling?"

"I just remembered something that happened when I was here last time. Something with Jeanine. I need to speak with Tobias." I quickly reply.

"Ok, as soon as Peter comes back I'll find him. Are you ok?" He asks. "Of course you're not ok. Sorry. Hey, I wanted to tell you I went to see Eric."

"When? What happened?" I ask.

"Earlier when they were testing you. I told him you were here, and he gave me this for you." He reaches inside of his jacket and hands me a folded piece of paper. I quickly open it.

 _My opponent moves first, yet I arrive first._

 _I don't regret any of it._

I read the simple sentences again, analyzing the cryptic message. "He's coming for me. He loves me." I whisper.

"Of course he does." Edgar replies. We both look back when we hear the door open and see Peter walk in.

"Everything ok?" He asks.

"Yeah, I remembered something from when I was here before. I need to speak with Tobias." I reply. Edgar stands up.

"I'll find him." He says as he walks out of the cell. Peter looks over at me with a worried expression.

"Tris, whatever you remembered do you really think it's a good idea to talk to him?" He asks.

"Yes. He has an implant Peter. Something Jeanine and Caleb put in him that can be used for mind control, specifically divergent mind control." I reply and his eyebrows lift in surprise.

"Fuck. Ok. Tris, while you were sleeping we had Will reach out to Eric. They're coming tonight. Four convinced us to get them here as soon as possible because he's afraid of what Caleb is going to do to you." He replies.

"Caleb will stop at nothing to get his serum perfected Peter. You saw that." I reply and he nods.

"Do you think we can really trust him?" He asks.

"I don't know who to trust anymore." I reply. "The people who I thought I could trust with my life betrayed me, and the people who I thought wanted me dead saved me. Who would have thought that Eric, you and I would be depending on each other?"

"Or that we'd be trusting some factionless guy who just happens to be your brother?" He replies while shaking his head. "But, none of this is a shocking as walking in on you and Eric having sex." He chuckles.

"Peter!" I shout, but as soon as we make eye contact we both chuckle. My cell door opens and Tobias comes in.

"You wanted to see me?" He asks. I gesture for Peter to leave and he does without protest.

"Take off your shirt." I reply. His expression is one of shock.

"Tris, you realize this isn't a sim right?" He asks.

"Yes, now take your damn shirt off." I reply.

"What? Why?" He asks.

"We don't have a lot of time. I remembered a conversation that Jeanine and Caleb had in front of me." I walk over to him and yank his shirt over his head. "They implanted something into your tattoo to use to mind control you."

"Tris, that's crazy. You must have remembered a sim they put you through." He replies, fighting against me removing his shirt.

"Tobias, stop! Take off your fucking shirt now!" I yell at him and his eyes widen.

"Keep it down." He replies angrily, but he finally yanks his shirt off. I begin tracing his tattoos with my hands.

"This is ridiculous. You're going to hate me once you have your senses back." He mumbles as I dig my fingers into each black mark on his back.

"Oh my god." I say. My fingers drag across one of the thick black lines that cross his back. I lightly press on the small imperfection in his skin.

"What do you feel?" He asks.

"I always thought this was scar tissue, or even a small mole. This doesn't feel like any of your other scars Tobias. We need help." I walk over to my cell door and knock against the glass. Edgar and Peter walk over, unlocking the door and stepping inside.

"What the fuck?" Edgar asks shooting daggers at Tobias' shirtless form.

"He has an implant. Once that Jeanine and Caleb put in him to mind control him. Feel this." I point out the area on Tobias' back.

Edgar examines the area I pointed out, then pokes his finger around until he also feels the same small bump. "Are you sure?" He asks.

"Let me feel." Peter moves his hand to the same spot. "It could be something." He says.

"How do we find out what it is?" I ask.

"Remove it." Tobias replies. "Get it out of me."

"Seriously? Are we just supposed to perform surgery here in a jail cell?" Peter scoffs.

"I can cut it out but it's going to hurt like a son of a bitch. And we don't even know for sure what it is." Edgar says.

"I can take pain, trust me. Get it out." Tobias replies.

"Fuck. Ok, we need towels, some way of sterilizing this knife." Edgar pulls a knife out of a sheath. "Bandages, shit like that. I don't know, I don't do surgeries."

"I'll get some help from Lynn. She at least has some clinic training." Peter replies as he stands. "Come on Edgar, let's go get your stuff." He says and the two walk out of the cell quickly.

"What do you remember about this thing Tris?" Tobias asks nervously.

"Just that Caleb told Jeanine he had found a way to mind control you using the implant. That's how they got you to bring me to them." I reply. Tobias looks at me with complete shock on his face.

Edgar, Peter and Lynn enter the cell carrying both dry and wet towels, some smaller cloths, and some bottles.

"Ok, Will and I are going to stay out in the corridor and keep an eye on things. Knock on the window if you need us." Peter says as he leaves the cell.

"Four, lay on your stomach." Lynn commands. Tobias lays down on my cot. I watch as Lynn uses the cloths and some strong smelling liquid to clean the area where the implant is. Edgar uses another cloth and the same liquid to wipe down his knife.

"Alright, are you ready?" Lynn asks and Tobias nods.

"I'm sorry man." Edgar says with a sigh before he makes his cut. Tobias grunts in pain, and moves involuntarily. I quickly move to sit close to him, pulling his head onto my lap and taking his hands.

"Tobias, you have to be still. I know this hurts." I whisper to him. He clutches my hands and nods.

"Keep going." He says.

Edgar makes one more small cut as Tobias squeezes my hands tighter. I watch as Lynn wipes down a large set of tweezers and steadies herself across from Edgar.

"Ok, we're going to have to dig in to find it. I'm sorry Four." Lynn says softly as she places the tweezers inside the incision and within a few minutes pulls out a tiny round object. She and Edgar quickly stich up the incision area and clean it up before placing a bandage over it. I watch as they clean the object off before showing it to us.

"That was inside of me?" Tobias asks.

"Yeah. I've never seen anything like it before." Edgar replies.

"So it's possible that he's been controlled by this thing?" Lynn asks.

"According to what I remembered Caleb and Jeanine talking about yes. He could be programmed to do anything they wanted." I reply. I realize at this moment the extent of what they did to Tobias.

The cell door opens again and both Will and Peter step in. "It's started." Will says quietly. "Just got a message from Chris letting me know that the troops are on the way. Chris and Marlene stayed back to watch the cameras, they've been working on getting the cameras here back up and running and they finally made a breakthrough today. They have inside and outside visuals now. This is finally happening."

"What do we do?" Lynn asks.

"They're sending an extraction team in to get us out of here safely and to capture Evelyn, Caleb and..." Will replies, stopping himself short.

"We'll do whatever is needed to keep everyone in this room safe." Peter says evenly. "But, I'm telling you now, don't fuck with me." He looks towards Edgar and Tobias when he says that.

"How long until they're here?" I ask.

"An hour tops. Be alert and prepared." Will replies. "I'd suggest getting out of this cell. We all need to try to stick together though."

"Agreed. Let's get ready." Lynn replies. Peter, Will and Lynn leave the cell. Edgar stands up and hugs me.

"See you on the other side, sis." He says with a smile before leaving the cell.

Tobias gingerly sits up, shrugging his shirt on. I reach out for him, "Stay, please?" I ask.

He nods and sits down next to me. He sighs before speaking quietly. "There's no way of knowing what I did as a result of their mind control, and what I did as a result of my mind being fucked from these sims. I should have never went to her."

"I'm going to tell you the same thing I told Eric, and that is no matter what choices you made there was always going to be someone right behind you to do whatever it was that Jeanine demanded. Evelyn too. Without your cooperation they'd have just found someone else."

"I killed your parents, Tris. I tried to kill you. I brought you here." He replies.

"Jeanine and Evelyn did those things. You were their weapon of choice." I reply softly. "It's the same thing we saw in Abnegation, where our friends were killing people mindlessly."

"You really believe that?" He asks doubtfully.

"I really do."

"Do you love him, Tris?" He asks.

"Do you really want to talk about him?" I ask, glancing over at where he's quietly sitting. He meets my gaze and nods in affirmation. "Yes, I do love him. He's a different person than what you perceived him to be. I think if you'd have given him a chance, you would have been friends."

Tobias scoffs. "I guess he never told you about Dalia then."

"Actually, he did. It's not my story to tell, but considering the two of you are too damn stubborn to actually speak to each other civilly I'll tell you. Jeanine held Eric's divergence over his head, threatening his life if he didn't cooperate with her. She ordered him to turn Dalia in, and if he refused she threatened to have both you and Dalia killed. She promised him that if he'd turn her in, she'd keep her alive and only memory wipe her once she was done with her testing. He didn't turn her in, but he did tell Jeanine how to find her, because he was trying to save both Dalia and _you_. As soon as Jeanine had Dalia, she demanded for him to bring her Amar and Eric helped fake his death so he could get away. Jeanine killed Dalia to punish Eric, just like she had his entire family killed to punish him for not doing everything else she asked." I reply.

Tobias sits in shock, not knowing how to reply. "Fuck. So, you're telling me a lot. Eric's divergent?"

"Yes."

"He worked for Jeanine to try to save his own life?" He asks.

"Yes, and his family's lives too." I agree.

"She killed people to punish him? Why?"

"Because he came in second to you during initiation and she had expected him to be first and a shoe-in for leadership. When he wasn't, that was his first strike. Then, when her requested divergent's started conveniently dying or disappearing she suspected he was failing at his mission, so strike two. Lastly, she demanded he turn me over to her, and when he didn't that was strike three. You see, he was just as mind controlled as everyone else, except it was psychological instead of by a serum." I reply.

"Jesus fucking christ, what the hell was wrong with that woman? I had no idea. He's always been so closed off, he's just an asshole all the time so how could anyone have known? Amar is alive?" He asks.

"Yes, Amar is alive, along with his husband George. They're back in Dauntless." I reply. "Eric is a hard person to get to know, but he's a good man Tobias. He loves me."

He nods his head. "I'm sorry I didn't give him a chance."

"You should tell him that when you see him again." I reply.

The cell door unlocks and Lynn opens it. "Clear out." She warns while holding the door open. Tobias stands and quickly exits the cell. I look out the window and after several minutes I see Evelyn, she gestures toward my cell and Tobias walks over to unlock the door.

"They want you in the lab." He whispers. "I'm going to figure something out." He cuffs my hands in front of me and gently pulls me towards him.

"Good evening Beatrice. I'm glad you were able to rest. We're going to run through some more tests." Evelyn says in a saccharine filled voice that makes me want to head butt her. She saunters in front of us and Peter and Tobias move to walk with me. Evelyn stops suddenly and turns around.

"You two will stay here." She gestures towards Tobias and Peter. "Edgar, please escort our guest." She commands before walking away. Edgar places a gentle hand on my arm and leads me towards the lab once again. Once we enter the lab, Evelyn gestures for Edgar to situate me in the glass room.

"Why did she make Tobias and Peter stay back?" I whisper as he slowly works on cuffing me to the chair.

"I don't know." He whispers back.

I see Caleb enter the lab and realize they've turned the two way speaker off so we can't hear them talking.

"She never stays." I whisper and he nods slightly.

"I know." He replies. We hear Evelyn's voice.

"Edgar, is she secure?" Evelyn asks.

"Yes ma'am." He replies.

"Good, you'll need to stay in there with her this time. Caleb has a new version of the serum and it's particularly strong. We'll need you to keep a close eye on her." She replies.

We watch Caleb come into the room. "Why are you doing this to me?" I ask.

He ignores me, instead he begins attaching leads methodically to me. For the first time, the leads are painful and I wince at each contact.

"Hold still or there will be consequences." Caleb says in a demanding voice. I close my eyes and try to block the physical and emotional pain. I feel a needle being inserted into my arm and open my eyes to find Caleb starting some sort of IV and attaching a small bag of what I assume is the serum. He looks over to Edgar and speaks.

"We will be monitoring her vitals closely. I need you to watch her for any physical changes. You may need to sedate her if she becomes violent or unruly." He commands, handing Edgar three separate syringes. "It's imperative that these leads stay attached while she has the IV. Removing even one of the leads before I've issued the command via the software can cause unexpected results, including death of the subject."

I shudder at how callously my own brother referred to me as 'the subject'.

"What exactly are you giving her this time?" Edgar asks. "And these are three different serums." He says, waving the syringes at Caleb.

"I've developed a hybrid serum, it's stronger than what we've been giving her. The serums you're holding are a sedative, an adrenaline shot and a memory wipe. I just want to be prepared. The clear is the sedative, the green is the adrenaline and the purple is the memory wipe."

"How will I know when to use these?" Edgar asks.

"The sedative will be quite obvious, if she gets unruly you sedate her. The adrenaline will be in the event that her heart stops, and the memory wipe may become necessary if she's uncooperative with this serum. Jeanine and I previously discovered that the subject was much more cooperative and testing was extremely successful when she had a fresh memory wipe." Caleb casually replies before turning on his heel and walking out of the room.

Edgar glances at me and I know he can see the pure panic in my eyes. He acts like he's checking my restraints and he whispers. "They just gave me weapons. Don't worry." He walks back over towards the corner of the glass room. I watch Caleb and Evelyn as they study whatever is on the computer. I look up at the ceiling, focusing on the camera I just now noticed close to a light fixture. I glance back at Caleb and Evelyn and they are in what almost looks like an argument, but we're unable to hear anything they're saying. I look at Edgar and notice he's also watching them closely. I'm startled when Tobias enters the room.

"Change of plans, Evelyn asked me to take you for some additional lab work. Apparently she and Caleb are having a disagreement." He says as he and Edgar carefully remove every lead that has been attached to me, along with the IV. He unlocks my cuffs and moves my hands back in front of my body, locking the cuffs into place. Tobias, Edgar and I start to walk away and Evelyn calls out.

"Edgar, stay." Evelyn commands. Edgar nods and walks towards her.

As soon as we're away from the lab, Tobias whispers to me. "We have to get out of here. They were intercepted."

"What? Are they ok?" I ask feeling the panic rising in me rapidly.

"I don't know." He replies.

"Why did Evelyn ask you to come get me?" I ask.

"That was actually my doing, I changed one of your test results and it caused a pretty heated argument between her and Caleb. I'm supposed to be taking you to the lab to have blood drawn again." He replies.

"What on earth were you able to change that actually got her to stop testing?" I ask.

"I put a positive pregnancy test, and made so you were far enough along in it for her to believe you may actually be carrying her grandchild." He replies as we make it to an area of the building I've never seen.

"The test was really negative though, right?" I ask and he actually chuckles.

"Yes Tris." He replies while checking the next hallway.

"Where are we going?" I ask.

"We're going back to Dauntless." He whispers as he walks me briskly through the hallway.

"No, we have to help them. We can't let them fail." I reply. I watch as his jaw tightens, but he pulls me to a stop. He unlocks my handcuffs and hands me one of his guns. He pulls his bullet proof vest over his head and places it on me.

"Stay close to me. They're going to be looking for you." He says before bringing my face up to his. "I mean it Tris, you stick by my side. This is fucking dangerous. We need to get as many Dauntless inside the building as possible. We have to secure this building before we can get to Evelyn." I nod against him and we begin running, heading out the first available door to the outside.

We are immediately spotted, and I follow Tobias' lead as we shoot the factionless and Erudite that come near us. We take cover in between buildings and soon I see a flash of blue running towards us with a gun trained on Tobias. I quickly push him down and shoot the Erudite, who falls in a heap onto the ground. Tobias is breathing heavy when he stands up.

"Good shot. We need his weapon and vest." He says and we hurry over to the dead man. I feel a pang of guilt as I see his lifeless eyes. I cover Tobias as he starts to remove the soldiers vest. Once he's gotten it on, he hands me the better rifle and I tuck his handgun into my waistband.

We look around the corner and find it clear. We begin running towards where we hear the action. Suddenly, Tobias stops and pulls me flush behind him. I see two factionless soldiers walking towards us and in the blink of an eye they begin shooting at us. We're able to quickly take the two men down, and I turn to speak with Tobias. I see his eyes start to glass over as he slides down the side of the building, leaving a large trail of blood.

"Tobias!" I yell. "No, you stay with me!" He has blood gushing from the side of his neck. I quickly remove my jacket and press it hard to his wound. "Look at me." I say to him.

His glassy eyes meet mine and he opens his mouth to speak. I hear him gurgling on his own blood and I lean as close to him as I can.

"I'm sorry... I love you..." He chokes out.

"You stay with me Tobias. Look at me. We'll find help. Please just focus on me. You're a good person Tobias Eaton. You made it right. You wanted your atonement and you got it. I forgive you. Please hang on." I sob as I watch his eyes completely glass over and hear one loud gasp of wet breath before he slumps against me.

"This isn't real, please tell me this is a sim. Get me out of here. I can't do this." I cry out, cradling his body against mine as I hear the sounds of gunfire in the distance. "Tobias where's my tell? You can't die like this."

I hear running, the boots making contact against gravel and the sounds coming closer and closer to me. I close my eyes and pull myself as close to Tobias' body as I can, praying for a quick death.

"Over here!" I hear a shout that sounds like Peter.

"Is she alive?" I hear Edgar's voice.

"Someone get Eric!" Lynn shouts.

I clutch to Tobias as someone places fingers to my neck. "Tris, are you injured?" Peter asks as I feel him wiping the tears off of my face. "Tris look at me."

"Oh my god is she hurt? Look at this blood!" Will shouts.

"She's alive, Four is dead." Peter says.

"We need to get his body off of her." Lynn says.

"No!" I scream. "This isn't real. He can't die like this." I sob hysterically and I hold onto Tobias as tightly as I can. I feel a set of warm calloused hands cupping my jaw as the thumbs wipe my cheeks.

"Tris, look at me. I'm here." Eric says and I open my eyes.

"You're not real, none of you are." I cry harder.

"I'm real, this is real, baby I'm right here. I love you." He says, leaning his forehead against mine.

"The building is secure. Zeke, Shauna, Tori and Uriah have Evelyn and Caleb in custody." Will says.

"Tris, we need to move you. Please." Eric says in a gentle voice.

"He saved my life." I choke out. "We can't leave him here. He made it right Eric. I forgave him."

"I forgive him too. He saved you. I owe him everything." Eric replies. "I love you, Tris."

"I love you too." I reply through my tears. "Tobias, I'm so sorry. You deserved better than this." I release my grip on his jacket and nod once. I feel his weight being moved away from me, and Eric picks me up immediately. I wrap my arms around his neck as he carries me bridal style. "Don't let them leave him here." I whisper.

"Please take care of his body." Eric says to Peter.

"We will." Peter replies. Edgar jogs up to Eric.

"I'll take you to Evelyn." He says and Eric follows him.

"I don't know if this is real anymore." I say and Eric holds me tighter. "I don't feel so good."

"This is all real. What's wrong Tris? Are you hurt?" Eric gently lays me down and he begins examining me for wounds. "She's covered in blood, I can't tell if any of it is hers."

"She's wearing the vest, and I don't see any injuries. This could be from the serum they were giving her, it was some sort of new hybrid that Caleb had just came up with." Edgar replies.

"Tris, do you hurt anywhere?" Eric asks.

"All over." I whisper.

"Edgar, we need to get her medical attention. Is the hospital still operational?" Eric asks.

"Yes. I can take her there." He replies.

"I'm not letting her out of my sight. The other leaders are fully capable of getting Evelyn and Caleb to Candor. Take us to the hospital." Eric replies.

That's the last thing I hear before darkness envelops me.


	16. Chapter 16

**AN: Sorry for the longer than normal wait for a new chapter. Enjoy.**

 **Eric POV**

Our troops have finally secured our access to Erudite and we make our way inside of the building and head straight for the holding cells expecting to find Tris. Instead, we find Will pacing restlessly.

"Where's Evelyn?" Zeke asks from beside me.

"She and Caleb are in the lab, cuffed. Lynn and Peter are guarding them." He answers.

"Where is Tris?" I ask. Will's attention moves to someone behind us and I hear Shauna shout.

"Put your hands where I can see them!" She yells at Four as he quickly holds his arms up in the air and drops to his knees. Shauna cuffs his hands behind his back and keeps her hands on his shoulders to stop any attempts he makes to stand.

"Where's Tris?" I ask again, looking at the obvious distress written across Four's face.

"The last sim was too much." He replies.

"What do you mean it was too much? _Where is she_?" I ask without hiding my anger.

"They pushed it too far. Her heart stopped. They killed her." He chokes out, letting tears freely fall.

With those words, it's as if time stands completely still. I stare at the man in front of me, my former friend, and I watch in horror as he completely falls apart. I repeat his words in my head, over and over, allowing my mind to filter everything that I refuse to hear. Tris is the only woman I've ever loved, and now he's telling me that she's dead.

"No. That's impossible." I look over at Will. "Where the fuck is Lynn? Peter? Edgar? Who's watching her? _I know someone is fucking watching her!_ " I yell. Will stands frozen in a mixture of shock and fear.

"When Evelyn came for her this last time, she would only allow Edgar to take her into the lab. We tried to go with her, and Evelyn forced us to stay behind." Four replies.

"Where's Edgar now?" Zeke asks, the pain evident in his voice even though he's trying to hide it.

"They sent him with her body. I don't know where he took her." Four replies, tears beginning to flow down his face again.

"This isn't happening. Take me to the fucking lab right now." I reply quietly and watch as Will nods his head. I turn to look at Shauna. "Bring him with us." I command and she nods quickly.

Will leads us to the lab where we find an equally distraught Peter and Lynn holding the cuffed Evelyn and Caleb at gunpoint. I pull out my pistol and walk over to Caleb, pressing the barrel directly to his forehead. He flinches and looks up at me with a terrified expression.

"Where's Tris?" I ask. Caleb pales and his eyes dart around the room. I push the barrel of my pistol harder to his forehead and ask him slowly, "where is your sister?"

"You don't need to answer that Caleb." Evelyn says calmly. She looks up at me. "Uncuff my son."

I lower my weapon and walk slowly over to Four. I press the barrel of my pistol to his temple and look directly into his mother's eyes. "Tell me exactly where Tris is or I kill him."

I can see the panic pass across Evelyn's features, quickly replaced by a hard expression. She sets her jaw, and presses her thin lips into a firm line. I turn back to Four and as I prepare to pull the trigger Evelyn cries out.

"Stop. I'll talk to you!" She says frantically. I slowly turn my head, not removing the gun from his head or my finger from the trigger. "Please take your gun away from him."

"Where is Tris? Answer me goddammit!" I yell and she flinches at my tone.

"I had Edgar take her body to the incinerator." She answers quietly.

"What did you do to her?" I scream.

"Her testing was instrumental in developing serums to combat divergence. Jeanine was wrong about keeping the faction system in order, but she was absolutely right in her belief that divergents are detrimental to our society. Beatrice didn't die in vain, she proved that our serum development is on the cusp of a huge breakthrough." Evelyn explains.

"You are talking about the woman I love like she was some sort of disposable lab test. Do you understand what you've done? That woman is my future, my fucking everything and you killed her." I can see the tears clouding my vision and feel their hot trails down my face. I walk directly to Evelyn and press the barrel of my gun to her forehead and I immediately feel a hand on my arm.

"Not like this man. I know you want to do it, and fuck I want to do it for you. If you kill her now they'll put you through another trial. You can't do this. They'll execute you." Zeke says in a tear choked voice.

"I have nothing left to live for." I manage to croak out through my own tears.

"She wouldn't want this. Dauntless needs you. We will take them to Candor, and when they're found guilty we'll give you the gun." Zeke replies, his hand firmly gripping my forearm.

"You killed your own sister, you fucking piece of shit!" I scream at Caleb, who is pale and looks like he may vomit. I notice his eyes are dry. "You don't even care!" I scream.

I let Zeke slowly lower my arm and feel him take my pistol from my hand. Shauna captures me in an embrace and I hear Zeke commanding to move our prisoners to Candor for an immediate trial for their crimes. Will and Lynn move towards Caleb and Evelyn, and I make eye contact with Peter.

"I'm so sorry." He offers, I can see the dried tears marking his face.

"Fuck you." I snarl at him as Shauna does her best to hold me back. Zeke quickly steps between Peter and me.

"Peter, Will and Lynn you are responsible for watching our three prisoners. I will call Jack and ask for transportation to be sent for them. Shauna, stay with Eric." Zeke commands as he quickly leaves the room to make his call. The lab doors open and Edward and Tori walk in. Tori heads straight to me and puts her arms around me as I once again break.

"Eric, I'm so sorry." She whispers as we cry on each other's shoulders. Edward squeezes my shoulder and takes his place next to Lynn.

"I need to find Edgar. I want to see her before..." I'm unable to complete the sentence.

"We've got this under control, go Eric." Lynn says quietly and I let Tori lead me out of the lab. She quietly leads me to the morgue of Erudite and we look around for Edgar and are unable to find any traces of him. There are several men manning the incinerator and we make our way to them.

"Do you know what was done with the body of Tris Prior?" Tori asks quietly and one of the men raises an eyebrow to her.

"No offense ma'am, but with the casualties from this attack we've been busy taking care of the bodies. If she was brought in, she's already gone." He replies as he gestures his head towards the incinerator. I can't take any more of this and I quickly retreat, running as fast as my feet will carry me back towards the lab, with Tori on my heels.

I take several deep breaths in an effort to steel myself, and I open the lab doors.

"How long until transport is here?" I ask Zeke.

"Should be any minute. Shauna and I will escort the guards and prisoners." He replies somberly.

"I'm going too." I reply with a finality that stops any potential arguments. We stand in silence until the truck arrives, and once we've loaded our prisoners along with ourselves we take a silent ride to Candor.

When we arrive at Candor, we are immediately greeted by Jack Kang. "You've all done well in ending this uprising. We thank you, Dauntless, for all of your hard work and sacrifices." He turns his attention to me. "Eric, may I have a word in private?" He asks and I simply nod and follow him to his office.

"Please, have a seat." He says, as he takes his own seat behind his massive desk. "You are familiar with our trial procedures in regards to war criminals, yes?" He asks.

"Yes." I agree.

"Good. I understand there are some special circumstances to consider." He pauses, takes a deep breath and continues speaking. "First, I've heard from Zeke Pedrad that there will be a charge of murder of a faction leader brought against the three prisoners."

"That is correct." I reply stoically.

Jack nods his head, and continues. "Second, I understand that Tobias Eaton is resistant to serums, and as a result we'd be unable to guarantee his testimony under the truth serum. We do have an archaic, yet effective machine called a lie detector that allows us to measure a persons honesty based on their physical bodily reactions to questions. It was used many decades ago, and while truth serum is without a doubt our preferred method, we understand that we must take other measures when these types of crimes have been committed." He explains.

"How accurate is this method?" I ask.

"I'd compare it to the fear simulations that Dauntless puts initiates through. It measures heart rate through leads, and it writes its results as a line graph. The less the pen moves, the more truthful the response. Movement by the pen during a response is a sign of dishonesty. Unlike your fear simulations, we will not give Tobias time to calm his heart rate to pass a question, instead we use the initial heart rate response as an indication of his truthfulness. A man's life is on the line, so we have to ensure we take all necessary steps to give him a fair trial." Jack replies. "I also understand there is an element of personal conflict in regards to the crimes these prisoners have been accused of."

"If you are referring to the fact they killed the woman I love then yes, it is _very_ personal." I reply. Jack nods his head once and his usually emotionless face is showing sympathy.

"It will take us a few hours to get the lie detector set up, as well as get our qualified staff in place to conduct the test. Please feel free to make yourselves at home while you're here. And Eric, you have my sincerest condolences for your loss." He replies in his quiet manner. I nod in response and we both rise as he ushers me out the door.

Once I'm in the hallway, a familiar ache falls over me as I think about my time here with Tris. I wander down into the hallway with the guest quarters, and I quietly slip in to the room that we shared. I sit on the bed and remember the conversation we had when she slipped and told me she loved me. Our relationship was anything but conventional, with me burying the feelings I had for her by having meaningless one night stands while I watched her develop feelings for Four during initiation. I still remember the night I finally made up my mind to talk to her I saw her coming out of the fear landscape room with Four, and the way they interacted told me I'd never have a chance. Who'd select the cruel and ruthless leader when they had the mysterious mister nice guy pining away for them? Four was always someone's first choice, and even though Tris was involved with him before me she chose to give me her heart. I sit back on the bed with my back against the wall and I stop fighting the tears that have been burning my eyes since we arrived at Candor.

I jump in surprise when the door opens and I watch as Peter walks in.

"Eric, I just want to talk, please." He says quietly.

"How'd you know where to find me?" I ask gruffly.

"I had a hunch you'd find your way back to this room." He replies and I gesture for him to sit on the other bed.

"I'm sorry." He says. "I'm so fucking sorry. She was coming with or without me, and I thought I could protect her. I should have never put the idea in her head."

"You underestimate her. Once she saw those mind control sims that Marlene, Christina and Finn were under she had her mind made up." I reply while running my hand through my messy hair.

"She wanted to protect you. She thought by turning herself in they'd leave you alone." He replies.

"I want to know what they did to her."

Peter sighs and says nothing at first, the silence deafening. Finally, he shifts his weight on the bed and looks up at me.

"Torturing yourself isn't going to change anything..." He begins and I immediately cut him off.

"Tell. Me. Everything." I growl and I can see the effect my tone has on Peter.

"They put her through sims. She manipulated the first sim so much that it immediately put a target on her." He replies.

"Don't give me the short version, I want to know everything." I reply and he nods.

"The first sim is what they called the baseline. It's just like what they did to her before, except this time she hadn't been dosed with memory serum prior. The beginning of the sim was the normal result, a sim that made it perfectly obvious that it wasn't reality. She managed to make it through that quickly, but she morphed it into a very realistic rescue scene. She found some way to determine that you were a sim, and once she did she came out of the sim on her own. It both fascinated and frustrated Caleb, and it sent him to the lab to work on the serum."

"I assume there were more sims." I reply and he nods.

"Four figured out early on that we were up to something. He called us on it, but also told us he wouldn't stop us or let her become a lab rat. He helped her the first night by going over some tips from his own experience in the sims. I don't know all of the details of what they talked about, but what he said helped her. He also explained how to manipulate the sim in a way that both made Caleb think his serum was improving, but also made it obvious that it wasn't perfect. He knew that if she frustrated Evelyn too much she would order her to be killed." He stops talking and closes his eyes before continuing. "The serum got better, and she was having difficulties manipulating the sims. In one sim, she let you kill her because she refused to fight back, she kept telling you how much she loved you no matter what. That one was incredibly rough on her. The same session threw her into another sim in which she thought she had woken up and was brought back to her cell just to watch you be dragged in to another cell seemingly unconscious. In that sim, Four allowed her into your cell and you woke up disoriented and seemingly mind controlled. You were choking her, and in the sim I shot you. She watched you bleed out and die. She didn't get out until she realized you were missing piercings in the sim. It was awful. That's the night Four told us to get in contact with you. He was planning on taking her away from there if we didn't reach out."

"Why'd he let her back into the lab after that? Why didn't he fucking leave?" I ask angrily.

"They were supposed to let her rest after the hellacious sims she had gone through, but Caleb had some sort of breakthrough and it was enough that Evelyn herself came to pick Tris up from her cell. Four and I started to escort her, but she forced us to stay behind and only allowed Edgar to go with her." He replies.

"I trusted Edgar. Do you think..." I ask but Peter cuts me off.

"I'm putting my name on the line with this but I don't think he would have hurt her. Unbelievably, I also don't think Four would either. There's something you need to know." He says and I am instantly on edge. "Tris had a flashback from her time in Erudite. She remembered a conversation between Jeanine and Caleb about a mind controlling implant that was placed inside of Four's skin, hidden in one of his tattoos. After that flashback, we found the implant and Lynn and Edgar cut it out of him." He reaches into his pocket and pulls out a tiny black device. "This is what they found. Tris also remembered that Caleb specifically said that they used the mind controlling device to make Four bring her to Jeanine."

"Fuck." I whisper, rolling the small device between my thumb and index fingers. My mind starts to immediately wander. She found all of this out before she died. She's gone. No matter what else Peter tells me, and no matter how many details I make him go over she's gone.

"She loved you. She never gave up on you coming for her." Peter says softly.

"I let her down. I wasn't fast enough." I reply, not caring that I'm showing weakness. In this moment, Peter's not my subordinate, he's my friend, and actually one of the closest people to me besides Tris.

"You did everything you could. We had no idea that they'd allow her to be pushed past the breaking point." He replies. "She never would have blamed you. Fuck, I'm sorry man, she was a fucking amazing woman."

"She was my everything." I mumble, letting the tears silently stream down my face. Peter and I sit in silence, each fighting internal battles with guilt and blame.

 **Edgar POV**

I'm watching Tris intently, her body thrashing violently to whatever sim they're putting her through. I can see Caleb's face, an expression of awe across his features as he animatedly has a conversation with Evelyn. Tris looks bad, her face extremely flushed and I notice her nose begins to bleed. I press the two way button to speak to Evelyn and Caleb.

"She's bleeding, and thrashing a lot. Is she ok?" I ask, feigning indifference.

"Her blood pressure is up, and her heart rate is high. She'll be ok though, I just want to ensure this serum is working." Caleb replies, never taking his eyes off of the monitors in front of him. I see the nosebleed is increasing its intensity and I can see the rapid movements of her eyes beneath her eyelids. I try to listen to Caleb and Evelyn's conversation, but they've practically stopped talking to watch her sim.

Suddenly, there are alerts and alarms going off. I quickly glance at Tris and she looks bad. I watch in horror as Caleb simply silences the alarms and continues watching her sim. I finally hear Evelyn speak.

"This is terrible. I can't bear to watch my son die like this. Have you no control over what she sees?" She asks Caleb and he shakes his head.

"It's all based on her neuro simulations." He replies.

"She's trying to save him. My word. She's showing him compassion." Evelyn replies in awe, glancing over at Tris. I steady myself and keep an emotionless expression, even though I'm screaming inside.

"She may have some unresolved feelings, or it just may be her divergent wired brain playing tricks on her." Caleb replies.

The alarms start blaring again and I begin to panic. "Should I be doing something?" I ask.

"Not yet, we're so close." Caleb replies, he silences the alarms but they immediately start going off again. I hear a muffled scream from Tris, then a gasp and she stills.

I quickly move towards her and check her pulse and find nothing.

"She has no pulse." I yell and Evelyn's face pinches. Caleb doesn't react. "Should I give her a shot?" I yell and he shakes his head. I look at Tris' face and see the fear etched on it. I glance over at Evelyn and Caleb and see they are arguing so I quickly remove the leads from her heart monitor and inject the adrenaline into her chest, praying that I am making the right decision. I see her eyes fluttering and hear her take a breath, she opens her eyes and I can see the terror in them. I lean in to her and whisper for her to play dead, and she quickly complies.

"Look, I'm not trying to be insubordinate, but this is creepy as hell. I should get her to the morgue, right?" I ask and Caleb throws an unreadable look towards Tris. It's Evelyn that speaks next.

"Yes, Edgar please take her down to the morgue." She says evenly. I watch as Caleb wheels a gurney to me and he comes into the room, emotionlessly unhooking the remaining leads from Tris. This man, my own flesh and blood, disgusts me to no end. He helps me lift Tris onto the gurney and walks away without a second look. As I wheel her from the room, I overhear Caleb excitedly telling Evelyn that he has exactly what he needs to complete the serum. I swallow back bile as I make my way quickly from the room. I try to wake Tris but she's groggy and her breathing is shallow. I check her pulse and while its slightly fast, it feels strong. I make a split second decision to get her to the hospital as quickly as possible, promising that I will find the others soon.

I race down the hallways until I finally make it to the underground tunnel that runs to the basement where the hospital is. As I finally burst through the doors I scream for help, and quickly there are people in scrubs assisting me.

"What happened?" A woman asks me.

"Her heart stopped, I gave her an adrenaline shot. They think she's dead. Please don't inform Evelyn or Caleb." I quickly answer, my words running together. The woman gives me a peculiar look, but a tight smile and nod.

"What's her name?" She asks.

"Tris. Please help her." I reply watching as a team wheels her away from me. "Please. She's the only family I have left."

"My name is Melody. I'm one of the nurses here. We won't let you down." She replies, giving my arm a squeeze.

"I'm Edgar." I reply.

"Follow me Edgar, I'll show you where you can wait. We'll get you back to see Tris as soon as possible, ok?"

I nod and numbly follow the nurse, the whole time hoping that I've made the right decision.

"Did this happen during the attack?" She asks as we walk down a hallway. I look over at her, perplexed. "You do realize we're under attack? Dauntless is above ground attacking the factionless that have infiltrated our headquarters."

My heart practically beats out of my chest. "Christ. I had no idea. I just wanted to get my sister here as quickly as possible. They're here to stop Evelyn."

"Good." She replies. "Very good. We should be safe down here, we'll only evacuate if necessary."

"You seem so calm." I blurt out. She smiles as she replies.

"This has happened before, it's been constant chaos since Jeanine. Since we're the biggest, and really only hospital in the city, we are typically treated as neutral ground. We're safe here. I'll be back soon to update you." She replies with a smile before walking away from the waiting room she escorted me to. I start to pace restlessly, worried that I was too late to save her. I think about Eric, and what this will do to him. I don't know him well, but I know how much my sister loves him, and how much he appears to love her. I finally sit down in a chair, and before long I must doze off because I am startled awake by a hand on my shoulder.

"Edgar, I can bring you back to her now. She's asleep, under a very mild sedative, but she should wake soon." Melody says as I begin to follow her.

"Is she ok?" I ask.

"She is fine. We've started running some tests to see if the serums they injected her with have negatively impacted her, but you saved her life. Her heart is good, EKG was normal, she has perfect brain activity and her vitals are strong. She's ok." She replies with a smile as she leads me to a curtained off area. She opens the curtain and points me towards a chair. "The doctor will be in to talk to you shortly."

I pull the chair over to her side and watch her sleep. It's the first time I've seen her so peaceful.

 **Tris POV**

I can hear the rustling of paper near me, along with a steady beeping noise. I feel heavy, and incredibly sleepy, but this bed doesn't feel like the cot I've been sleeping on for days. I hear voices that sound like nothing more than murmurs, and when I try to move my hand I'm aware of an IV sticking in it. I remember Caleb giving me an IV, and I open my eyes to take in my surroundings.

The first thing I notice is I'm not in a familiar room, I had assumed I was still in the glass hell hole, but I'm in a sterile looking room surrounded by medical equipment, and sectioned off by a curtain. I glance over and see someone sitting in a chair close to my bed, legs crossed with an ankle resting on a knee reading an Erudite newspaper.

"Hello?" I croak and the newspaper drops. It's Edgar.

"Hey, finally you're awake." He smiles as he gently runs his hand across my forehead.

"Where am I?" I ask.

"Erudite, we're in the hospital right now. How are you feeling?" He asks.

"Tired, and like I'm dragging a bit. Are you ok? Where's Eric?" I ask.

"I'm not sure." He replies.

"He left me here?" I ask.

"No, he doesn't know you're here. You crashed during the sim, I had to bring you here." Edgar replies.

"Edgar, you're confusing me. I remember you and Eric bringing me here." I reply, watching him closely for signs of a sim. "How long have I been here?" I ask.

"A few hours. Tris, I think you might be confusing the sim with reality." He replies.

"No. No..." I squeeze my eyes shut to try to prevent my tears from spilling. I feel Edgar gently place his hand on mine.

"Don't cry, just take a deep breath." Edgar replies.

I can feel panic rising. "You're not real."

"Tris, calm down. I'm real. I'm right here." He replies softly.

"Tobias...he died..." I choke out.

"Tris, that was part of the sim you were under." Edgar replies evenly.

"This isn't real." I say losing the battle with my emotions. Tears spill out unabashed, and I can feel the warm paths they take down my face.

"Tris, focus on me. You're no longer in a sim. Caleb and Evelyn put you under using a stronger serum, and through a continuous drip IV. You were panicking during the sim, you couldn't control your heart rate and at one point it stopped. I had to give you the adrenaline shot to bring you back, and then I rushed you here. Evelyn and Caleb think you're dead. Tris, whatever you think happened that caused you to witness Tobias' death was all a sim." Edgar explains.

"There were no tells. You all looked exactly like you always do. Everything was the same. How do I know _this_ isn't the sim?" I ask.

"You won't, not until you see everything for yourself and you allow yourself to believe the torture is finally over." Edgar replies wearily.

"This isn't real." I cry, putting my hands over my eyes. "I can't do this anymore."

"I'm right here." He says.

"Where's Eric?" I ask. "I need to know this is real."

"I don't know, Tris." Edgar answers. "I had to bring you straight here, you were in bad shape. No one knows where we are."

"I'm losing my mind. I can't do this. I don't know what is real anymore. Please find Eric." I beg.

"Tris, Erudite was attacked by Dauntless. They've taken control of the factionless and everyone who was working for Evelyn. It's over. They're going to pay for their crimes." He says gently.

"I need to find Eric. He could be hurt. He could be in danger. Edgar, they think I'm dead!" I can feel the panic rising.

"Hey, I'm here for you Tris. You've got to calm down." Edgar gently places his hand on my cheek.

I try to concentrate solely on Edgar, looking for anything to tell me if this is a sim or reality.

"Where is Tobias?" I ask. Edgar sighs and shifts uncomfortably in his chair.

"I don't know. Dauntless was looking for him, they planned on arresting Evelyn, Caleb and him." He replies.

"He helped me." I reply.

"He did, but as far as Dauntless leadership is concerned, his crimes are punishable, they will give him a trial." Edgar replies.

"Edgar, we have to get out of here. Tobias is serum resistant, and they won't allow him to be tried with truth serum. I need to talk to the rest of leadership. I can't let them execute him. I need to talk to Caleb too." I reply, sitting up in the bed and pulling the tape off of my IV.

"Wait, let me get a nurse to help with that. Please. We need to make sure you're ok Tris. Your heart stopped." He warns.

I shake my head. "My heart is obviously working now. Edgar, we have to go." I pull the IV out of my arm and hold a paper towel to stop the bleeding it caused. "Where are my clothes?" I ask. Edgar hands me a bag and steps outside of the curtain. I quickly change my clothes and open the curtain. Edgar shakes his head at me, but follows me through the halls and out of the hospital.

"I have to find Eric." I keep repeating. Edgar looks at me with concern.

"Tris, this is real. I wish there was some way I could prove that." He says.

"When I find Eric, he'll know exactly what to do." I reply, jogging towards the train tracks.

"Where are we going?" He asks.

"Candor. We have to get there before they start the trials." I reply. "How good are you at hopping a train?" I ask.

"Please. Give me a real challenge." He answers with a smirk. We see the train approaching and I start to run, glancing at Edgar as he takes off running beside me. We jump onto the train with ease and sit back against the wall of the empty car, watching the city fly past the open doors.

"Do you feel ok?" He asks.

"Yes, I actually do. You saved me, didn't you?" I ask and he looks away. I reach out to touch his cheek and feel the moisture on it. "Look at me, please." He turns back to face me. "Thank you."

I reach for Edgar and we hold on to each other tightly. The familiar feeling of safety warms me, and I squeeze my brother a little.

"You're the only family I have left." Edgar whispers and I bury my face in his shoulder, breathing in his scent. We cling to each other until it's time to jump off the train. Edgar and I break into a sprint towards the headquarters, and quickly burst through the doors, getting strange looks from the Candor residents. I stop a man walking by and ask when the trial for the war criminals is starting.

"It's about to start now, follow me." He briskly replies and Edgar and I fall into step behind him as he escorts us to the largest of Candor's court rooms. I find that it's packed, and an incredible feeling of deja vu passes over me. I look around for Eric and while I see many wearing Dauntless black, I have yet to spot him. The crowd quiets as Jack Kang takes his place on stage and begins speaking.

"We have three trials to complete. Trial one will be for Caleb Prior, trial two for Evelyn Eaton and trial three for Tobias Eaton. All three are charged with war crimes including hostile takeover of the government, genocide and murder. There is an additional charge of murder of a faction leader." Jack recites in his calm voice and my stomach drops.

"Eric?" I whisper to Edgar with tears in my eyes.

"Who is the faction leader?" Edgar shouts, and Jack Kang pauses his movements and scowls at the interruption.

"I don't particularly care for outbursts in my courtroom. However, to answer your question the victim is Tris Prior, a Dauntless leader who was killed in the custody of the three accused."

"No, I'm alive!" I quickly shout and the crowd breaks out in loud gasps and murmurs. I can see Jack scanning the crowd for me, and Edgar grabs my hand and pushes through the crowd until I'm by the stage. I see Jack's face break out in a rare smile.

"Quiet!" He shouts and the noise dies down. "The trials will begin in fifteen minutes." He announces before walking to the edge of the stage and jumping down to speak to me. "Come with me." He commands and Edgar and I follow him, almost jogging to keep up with his fast pace. He leads us into a small conference room, where several Dauntless are engaging in private conversations. I see Eric talking to Peter, with his back facing me. Peter's eyes widen when he sees me and Eric turns to follow his line of site.

Tris..." He chokes out as I jump into his arms, wrapping my legs around him. He buries his head in my neck and I can feel his body shaking with sobs.

"Is this real? Please tell me this is real. Please baby." I cry into his shoulder and he lowers us to a seated position on the ground, not caring who's around us. He holds me as tight as he can while I squeeze my arms and legs tightly around him.

"I love you so much. They told me you were dead." He says and I feel his tears soaking into my shirt.

"I need this to be real." I repeat as he keeps his tight grip on me.

"This is real. Don't you ever leave me again." He breathes into my neck as he places gentle kisses on it. I breathe in his scent, the hint of gunmetal mingling with his natural scent, the faint trace of the masculine body wash he uses, and when I move my cheek against his I can feel the familiar scratch of the stubble that always appears if he doesn't shave daily. I move my hands to his unruly curly hair, running my fingers through it and across the silky close shaved sides. He sighs against me before leaning back to capture my lips with his.

"This is real." I whisper against his lips and I feel him smile briefly. "I love you." I whisper before he kisses me again.

"I love you too." He whispers back. We hear a throat clear behind us and both turn to look up at Jack.

"My apologies for the interruption, I know that you both need time to recover from the ordeal you've been through however the trials are set to begin now. I thought you'd like to attend." Jack says as we nod in agreeance. I try to move from Eric's lap but he holds on tight.

"I'm never letting you go again." He whispers in my ear as he maneuvers both of us into a standing position, his hand immediately finding mine and he threads our fingers together as we walk to the courtroom.


	17. Chapter 17

**AN: Thank you for all the reviews, favorites and follows. It makes my day to see them.**

Eric POV

For the first time in my life I can freely admit I am an emotional wreck. As we head into the courtroom, I feel like I'm teetering on the edge of sanity. I've spent the last several days going from one end of the emotional spectrum to the other. I first found a way to admit to myself that Tris was it for me, that this was more than just a dip into the relationship pool, instead what I felt for her was the very reason I'd never bothered with another woman before her. No one in my past, present or future would _ever_ be what Tris Prior is to me. When we got to Erudite and they told me she was dead, it was like someone ripped my heart out of my chest and stomped on it while I watched. Fucking torture. Now I sit here, trying to process that the woman I love is not only very much alive but she is sitting right beside me. The electricity that I feel every time we touch is flowing through my veins as I hold on to her like she may just disappear right before my eyes.

I lean towards her and capture her lips with mine. I need to feel her right now, and taste her. So quickly she was almost ripped out of my life permanently. I'm a fucking mess right now and she needs me to be strong. Emotions are not my thing, and as I sit here next to her all I want to do is run as far away from this shit as I possibly can, just her and I, and say fuck the consequences. I'm in too deep and it scares the hell out of me.

"What are you thinking about?" She whispers to me.

"Too much." I reply, pressing my lips against hers again. I can feel her try to let go of my hand and I squeeze it harder.

"I'm right here." She says, her warm breath tickling my ear.

Before I can respond, the room falls silent as Jack Kang takes the stage. I lean in for another soft kiss before turning my attention towards the stage. Tris lays her head on my shoulder.

"We will be starting the trial of our three accused war criminals. Please bring Caleb Prior to the stage." Jack announces as we wait for Caleb to be brought out. I can feel the immediate change in Tris' posture as she watches her brother being roughly dragged out in heavy shackles and chains. I glance over and watch as Edgar takes her free hand in his.

"Caleb Prior, you've been accused of war crimes, hostile takeover of the government, murder and treason. You will be injected with truth serum and questioned. May the truth set you free."

I watch as they inject the truth serum into Caleb's neck and the look of fear washes over his face. Good. The fucking coward needs to be afraid for his life right now.

"Please state your name."

"Caleb Prior."

"To which faction were you born?"

"Abnegation."

"To which faction did you transfer?"

"Erudite."

"To which faction are you loyal?"

"Erudite." There are murmurs passing through the crowd, Jack holds his hand up in an effort to quiet everyone.

"What was your role in Jeanine Matthews plans?"

"I was in charge of serum production, specifically testing and developing serums to combat divergence."

"I see. When Jeanine was executed, what did you do?"

"I'd been playing both sides of the fence for a bit. I did what I needed to do to survive." Caleb replies without any emotion.

"Please elaborate."

"I believed wholeheartedly that Jeanine's opinion regarding divergents and their place in our society was ruining our faction system. We sought out the finest divergent we could find for our testing purposes, and that pointed towards Beatrice Prior. I knew we needed to bring her in for testing, and that she wouldn't come willingly. I used a mind controlling implant to program her then boyfriend Tobias Eaton to capture her and bring her to me. We used her for testing, and during the time we had her in custody I learned that one of who we believed to be Jeanine's most loyal soldiers was actually a traitor against her cause."

"Who was that?"

"Eric Coulter. I quickly determined he had feelings for Beatrice, and I decided to test his loyalty by making him believe I was concerned with Beatrice's well being. It was quite easy to do." He smirks.

"Why do you say that?" Jack asks.

"It was easy to convince him that our family ties were more important than any research."

"Back to my original question, when Jeanine was executed what did you do?"

"I helped Eric rescue Beatrice. I joined his cause, gained his trust and used my place by his side to continue in my attempts to wipe Beatrice's memory."

"I see, how many attempts were made against Miss Prior to wipe her memory?"

"The first was administered by Marcus Eaton as the time of her capture, then I personally gave her three doses while in captivity, and one dose when we got her back to Abnegation."

The crowd grows restless and somewhat irate. Tris is sitting up and leaning forward, but her face holds no expression. I place a kiss on her temple and she turns to me and softly kisses my lips.

"Beatrice Prior is your sister, correct?"

Caleb struggles for the first time against the serum but he quickly answers "Yes."

"And when Miss Prior was in your custody a second time, you continued to experiment on her?"

"Yes."

"Were you under any orders to continue experimenting on her?"

"Not necessarily orders. I began working with Evelyn Eaton when I learned she was continuing Jeanine's cause."

"What plans did you and Evelyn Eaton have in regards to the government?"

"Evelyn planned on ending the faction system. I was not in agreement with those plans, however her views on eliminating divergents is what brought me to her side."

"Did she promise you a role in her new government?"

"Yes, along with her son Tobias. However, she started to believe that her son's feelings towards Beatrice were clouding his judgment."

"Speaking of Tobias Eaton, during our preliminary questioning of him he advised that he had unknowingly had a mind control device implanted in him. Can you tell me what you know about this?"

"Jeanine and I hadn't been successful in developing a serum that would control the divergent mind, however I'd prototyped a small implanted device that could be programmed remotely to control ones mind. I inserted this under Tobias' skin, disguised by one of his massive tattoos, and I was successfully able to mind control him remotely. It was almost perfect." Caleb replies, smiling proudly the entire time.

"What did you program Mr. Eaton to do?"

"Let's see, the first successful program was bringing Beatrice to Jeanine and me. I also helped Jeanine program him to kill anyone in his way when we sent them in to raid a church basement that some of the Abnegation council members and divergent rebels were hiding in during the war. I also planted some memories, which in itself was quite fascinating."

There are shouts from the crowd, and Jack has to pause to send his guards out to escort people from the crowd. Tris turns to me.

"I cannot believe my own brother used Tobias as a weapon to murder my parents." She whispers to me. "He's an animal."

"I'm so sorry I ever let him near you." I reply and she shakes her head.

"No one knew he was capable of this." She replies as Jack continues his questioning of Caleb.

"Let's circle back around to the experimenting on Beatrice Prior. What ultimately happened to Beatrice while under your care?"

"She died during testing."

The crowd once again gets restless as Jack works towards gaining control. I look over at Tris and she has unshed tears in her eyes. I reluctantly let her hand go and put both of my arms around her instead, and she quickly moves so she is sitting in my lap with her arms wrapped tightly around me.

"You're so brave." I whisper against her cheek. "Do you want to stay?" I feel her nod once against me and we listen as Jack continues.

"So, Mr. Prior, you allowed your own sister to die under your care?"

"It was for the greater cause. If I had been allowed to continue, I would have perfected the serum to cure divergence."

"Do you know what the punishment is for murder of a faction leader?"

Caleb shows true fear as he answers. "No."

"Automatic execution." Jack replies as Caleb pales. "Fortunately, Miss Prior is very much alive, no thanks to you." The look on Caleb's face is unreadable, but before he can even think to react Jack continues. "Caleb Prior, did you willingly participate in Evelyn Eaton's plans to overthrow the government?"

"Yes."

"Did you willingly allow Beatrice Prior's heart to stop while putting her through the torturous testing for your serums?"

"Yes."

"Finally, what is your greatest regret?"

"Not succeeding. Failing to complete my serum." He replies stoically.

"Caleb Prior, you are guilty of war crimes, attempting a hostile takeover of the government and attempted murder. Your sentence is death, to be carried out within 48 hours. Please take him away and put him back in his cell. The trial of Evelyn Eaton will start in fifteen minutes."

We watch as the guards drag Caleb off of the stage and I look at Tris. She still clings to me, but her expression is hard.

"Tris..." I begin but she starts to stand up.

"I need to get up." She says. "Please, let me go."

"Tris, I don't want you to be alone right now." I reply, refusing to let go of her. She lets out a frustrated sigh.

"Eric, I just need to fucking pee!" She says, raising her voice in frustration.

"I'll go with her, if that's ok with you Tris." Tori says from beside me. Tris nods.

"Just a few minutes, please." She leans in and presses her lips firmly to mine. "I'm sorry I yelled."

"I'm sorry I'm so fucking clingy." I reply.

"I'll be right back." She kisses me again, short but passionately as she slips out of my grasp. Tori gives me a smile over her shoulder as the two exit the room. I look over at Edgar.

"Edgar, thank you. I know we don't have time to talk about all the details right now, but you brought her back to me. You saved her. I am forever in your debt." I say, extending my hand which he quickly shakes.

"She's my sister, and I love her. You never have to thank me for that." He replies.

"How are you, I mean this whole Caleb thing..." I say, not knowing exactly how to broach the subject.

"He's getting what he deserves. I wish he could have been more like our father, but he's actually more Jeanine's son than I ever was." He replies and I nod in agreement.

"That's an accurate statement." I reply. "Edgar, you realize I meant what I said before, you are welcome in Dauntless after this is all over."

"I'm glad you mentioned that because that's where I'd really like to be. I want to have a relationship with my sister." He replies.

"I think that would be good for you both." I add.

We watch as Tori and Tris make their way back into the room, and it's obvious that Tris has been crying. Tori offers me a tight smile and Tris returns to my lap, and I quickly wrap my arms around her tightly as she buries her head in my neck.

"It's still real." I say to her and she nods. I glance over at Tori and she shakes her head.

Jack comes back out to the stage and announces that Evelyn's trial is starting. We watch as Evelyn is brought out in chains.

"Evelyn Eaton, you've been accused of war crimes, hostile takeover of the government, murder and treason. You will be injected with truth serum and questioned. May the truth set you free."

Evelyn's face becomes expressionless as the serum takes over.

"Please state your name."

"Evelyn Johnson Eaton."

"To which faction were you born?"

"Candor." A huge gasp passes through the crowd as Jack holds a hand up.

"To which faction did you transfer?"

"Abnegation."

"To which faction are you loyal?"

"None. The faction system should be abolished."

"Were you working with Jeanine Matthews in her plans to overthrow Abnegation?"

"I was using her momentum for my own advantage. It would have helped me in my ultimate goal of destroying the faction system completely."

"Were you working with Jeanine Matthews in her hunt for divergents?"

"Yes. Divergents are detrimental to any society."

"What were your ultimate plans in regards to our government?"

"To break up the faction system and dismiss all of the current faction leaders. I planned on running the government myself, along with some trusted advisors." She replies.

"How did you plan on doing this?"

"Coersion. Force. Any means necessary." She answers smugly.

"Murder?"

"If needed."

"Genocide?"

"I thought I made myself clear when I said by any means necessary." She sneers.

"What were your plans for Beatrice Prior?"

"She exhausted her use for me, but she was helpful in the development of a serum that would eliminate divergence. I'd say that was a much more humane way of dealing with those atrocities than Jeanine's plan of killing them."

"You killed Beatrice Prior?"

"Yes. Science and war demand sacrifices."

I close my eyes and take a deep breath. I am ready to put a bullet in this bitch's head right now.

"I see, as I asked Mr. Prior before you, are you aware of the mandatory punishment for murder of a faction leader?" Jack asks.

"Probably death." Evelyn answers looking nonplussed.

"Definitely death." Jack confirms. "Lucky for you, Miss Prior is very much alive."

The shock is evident on Evelyn's face as she scans the crowd. She makes eye contact with me and scowls towards Edgar and Tris.

"You traitor!" She yells as she stares at Edgar. Jack quickly stands in front of Evelyn.

"You will _only_ speak to _me._ " He admonishes. "Evelyn Eaton, did you willingly make plans and issue orders in an effort to overthrow our government?"

"Yes."

"Did you willingly make plans and issue orders in an effort to destroy our faction system?"

"Yes."

"Did you allow a mind control implant to be used on your son, Tobias Eaton?"

Evelyn looks confused. "No. What do you mean?"

Jack simply shakes his head.

"Evelyn, what is your biggest regret?" Jack asks.

"Leaving my son with his monstrous father." She answers simply and I can feel Tris' sigh against my neck.

"Evelyn Eaton, you are guilty of war crimes, attempting a hostile takeover of the government and attempted murder. Your sentence is death, to be carried out within 48 hours. Please take her away and put her back in her cell. The trial of Tobias Eaton will start in thirty minutes. Please be advised that we will not be using serum during Tobias Eaton's trial due to his resistance to serums. We will be conducting a lie detector test." Jack says as he leaves the stage with a look of pure disgust.

Tris hasn't moved from her spot on my lap, and her face is still buried in the crook of my neck.

"Tris are you ok?" I ask and I can feel her shake her head no. "Do you want to leave?"

She doesn't answer, instead she lifts her head and kisses me. For a moment, we forget everything and everyone around us, and eventually when breathing becomes an issue I simply rest my forehead against hers.

"I'm becoming numb to this. Everyone seems to want to hurt me. I just don't know what my purpose is anymore." She says quietly.

I open my mouth to answer but we're interrupted by a familiar voice.

"You're really here." Uriah says as he walks towards us. Tris stands up and moves to hug him. I can see the emotion evident on his face, as well as his brother who is waiting behind him.

"You scared the hell out of us." Zeke says, grabbing her for a hug. Shauna soon joins us and both she and Tris break into tears when they see each other. Before long, we have everyone together, as Will, Lynn and Edward all come and hug Tris, and finally Peter steps up and I see something I'd never imagined seeing - both he and Tris embracing each other and crying. No one says a word, instead the emotional nature of their interaction causes everyone to step back and allow them to have their moment. I sit back down, running my hands through my hair and willing myself not to break down again. I've never experienced anything even close to the emotional roller coaster I've been on since begging Jeanine to spare my life years ago. I check out of the conversation, but keep my eyes locked on Tris, watching as the tears turn to laughter over something Uriah and Peter have said. Tori scoots close to me.

"You ok?" She asks.

"I will be." I reply, keeping a watch over Tris.

"This isn't going to be easy for either of you. I didn't get too much of a chance to talk to her earlier, but what little she told me it's obvious she was put through pure hell." She replies.

"I've gotten most of my information from Peter. I haven't even had a chance to really talk to her. She hadn't even fully recovered from the first time when Jeanine had her and then she was slammed into some even worse shit. Tori, how do I stop being so pissed off that she left?"

"You focus on right now. She's alive. None of the other shit matters. Think about how you felt a few hours ago compared to right now." She replies and I nod. "You have no idea how to deal with emotional stuff, huh?"

"Not a clue." I agree as Tori squeezes my arm.

"You two will figure it out together." She replies as we watch as Jack returns to the stage.

"Everyone, please take a seat. Due to the nature of this type of test, we will be conducting it behind closed doors and allowing a live video feed to be played here. This test measures heart rate, and we do not need any outside distractions affecting his testimony. Thank you for understanding, and please be advised that the live feed will be on momentarily." Jack says before quickly exiting the stage.

Tris returns to my lap, and we make adjustments to allow our team to sit closely together. We watch as the video feed starts on the large projection screen in front of us. Four is has several leads attached to his hands, fingers and chest and there are only Jack and an older gentleman who I've never met in the room.

"Tobias Eaton, you've been accused of war crimes, hostile takeover of the government, murder and treason. You have been connected to our lie detection machinery and will be questioned. May the truth set you free."

"Please state your name."

"Tobias Eaton."

"To which faction were you born?"

"Abnegation."

"To which faction did you transfer?"

"Dauntless."

"To which faction are you loyal?"

"Dauntless."

There is a pause as both Jack and the person monitoring the test look over the answers.

"So far, he's answered truthfully. We shall continue. Tobias, did you willingly leave Dauntless and join the factionless?"

"Yes." The test monitor nods his head.

"Why is that?"

"Two main reasons, one being I realized that Dauntless leadership was working with Erudite to overthrow Abnegation, and the other was I wanted a relationship with my mother." We see another nod before Jack continues.

"Did you willingly bring Beatrice Prior to Erudite?"

"No." Another nod. I am actually surprised at that response.

"Did you willingly murder anyone during the attack on Abnegation, or any time thereafter?"

"No." The test monitor shakes his head. Jack presses forward.

"You answered dishonestly. Who did you willingly murder?"

After a very long pause, Four finally answers. "Marcus Eaton." The monitor nods.

"Why?" Jack asks, his mask of indifference slightly skewed.

"He tried to kill me." Four answers quietly. The monitor nods.

"So, you killed Marcus Eaton in self defense?"

"Yes." Another nod.

"Besides Marcus Eaton, did you willingly murder anyone else during the attack on Abnegation, or anytime thereafter?"

"No." Another nod from the technician. Tris leans forward and I can see she's crying.

"Tobias Eaton, did you willingly participate in the testing of Beatrice Prior?"

"No, never." Another nod.

"Did you willingly participate in the attempted murder of Beatrice Prior?"

Four shakes his head and we can see his tears. "No, never. Caleb and Evelyn killed her." He replies and the monitor nods.

"Tobias, did you attempt to arrange a rescue for Miss Prior?"

"Yes, I worked with Peter, Will, Lynn and Edgar." He answers and receives another nod.

"Why?" Jack asks.

"Because I am in love with Tris, and because no one deserves to be tortured like that." Another nod from the technician and Tris continues to cry as I rub circles on her back.

"Tobias Eaton, did you ever willingly participate in plans to overthrow the government?"

"No, once I found out the true plans I tried to distance myself from my mother." The monitor shakes his head.

"You've been dishonest." Jack replies as Four tenses.

"I was willing to help my mother's cause when she told me she was against Marcus and Jeanine. After I found out she was actually working with them, I began trying to escape. I was not in control of my own thoughts, or aware of what was reality for a long time due to the testing and torture they put me through." The monitor nods.

"I'd like to invite one member of Dauntless leadership in to ask any additional questions." Jack says. I watch as everyone turns to me. Tris moves off of my lap and scoots closer to Edgar and when I meet his eyes he nods. I kiss Tris quickly before leaving the courtroom and I'm met in the hallway by a guard who escorts me to the holding room. Once inside Four and I make eye contact, both glaring at each other.

"Do you expect me to believe you can be loyal to Dauntless?" I ask, figuring ripping the bandaid off would be the best way to deal with this.

"Of course I can." Four replies and the monitoring technician shakes his head and mumbles.

"This is inconclusive. His heart rate went up as soon as you entered the room. If he stays like this, we won't get an accurate read." The monitor says and Jack shakes his head.

"Is there any leader in Dauntless you could send in your place?" Jack asks.

"Zeke." I answer and Jack nods.

"Please send him in." He replies and I glare at Four before leaving the room. I meet Zeke in the hallway.

"What should we be asking him?" He asks.

"I don't really give a fuck. He's not coming back to Dauntless." I reply walking away. I can hear Zeke calling out for me, but I keep walking until I reach the courtroom. I take a deep breath before entering and I return to my seat. I reach for Tris' hand and we wait for the testimony to continue. Zeke enters the room and he speaks briefly to the monitoring technician before he begins questioning Four.

"Do you really want to be back at Dauntless?" Zeke asks.

"Yes." A nod from the monitor.

"Why?"

"Because it was a mistake to ever leave. I can contribute to Dauntless again. I'll do whatever is asked of me." He replies and the monitor nods.

"Do you expect to be back in leadership?" Zeke asks.

"No. I neither want or deserve that position." Another nod.

"Why should any of us trust you again?" Zeke asks.

"I've never stopped being loyal to my faction." A nod from the monitor. "I was only disloyal to the path my faction was taking when certain leaders chose to follow Jeanine." Another nod.

"You have a personal issue with our head leader, correct?" Zeke asks.

"Yes." The monitor nods.

"Why?"

Four sighs. "He's an arrogant prick. He stole my girlfriend during a moment of weakness." He abruptly stops talking and the monitor nods.

"Anything else?" Zeke asks.

"Yeah. He should have shown up for her. He's just as responsible for her death as anyone else is." The monitor nods and Zeke is showing his anger.

"Will your personal issues with our head leader cause you to potentially be disloyal to our faction again?" Zeke asks.

"No. The only thing he had over me was Tris. We both have lost her now." He answers and the monitor nods. I can see Zeke is struggling with that answer, he pulls Jack aside and all we can see is Jack shaking his head.

"Dauntless has no additional questions at this time." Zeke says.

"Tobias Eaton, what is your biggest regret?" Jack asks.

"Not getting Tris out of there in time." He replies and we see the monitor nod his head.

"This concludes the testimony of Tobias Eaton. We find his testimony to be truthful and we defer to Dauntless leadership for his sentencing." Jack replies and looks at Zeke.

"The leaders need to meet to discuss this. Can I ask that the other leaders join us and we pause the live feed until we can discuss this?" Zeke asks and Jack complies.

"The live feed will be paused for thirty minutes to allow Dauntless time to deliberate, and also ask any additional questions of this prisoner. We adjourn for now." Jack announces before the feed goes black.

"They're leaving him in there while we discuss this?" Tori asks and I nod.

"They are leaving him hooked up to the detector and he'll be given a chance to plead his case. These are special circumstances based on the fact that he passed the test. Follow me." I say to Shauna and Tori. Tris stands as well.

"I'm going in there too." She says as she glares at me.

"I didn't think you'd want to." I start and she cuts me off.

"I'm a leader too." She says as she falls into step with us.

We walk into the room and Four immediately looks at Tris.

"You're here. Alive." He says as he tries to reach for Tris. Jack Kang immediately stops him.

"You need to stay put, you're still a prisoner and still attached to the machine." He warns.

I look between Tris and Four and see the raw emotion on both of their faces. She takes a seat next to me as we begin deliberations.

"Let's make this simple. He's a faction traitor, and the standard punishment is to be made factionless. It's what he seemed to want anyway." I say.

"He saved my life." Tris replies.

"He did, but he willingly left his faction and his position as a leader to join his mother's cause." Tori adds.

"I did, and I regret it." Four replies.

"What is the deal with this implant they talked about?" Zeke asks.

"Lynn and Edgar had to cut it out of him. It was real, and you heard Caleb's testimony. They used Tobias as a weapon. It's no different than when Dauntless was mind controlled into attacking Abnegation." Tris argues.

"Tris, it's _very_ different. He chose to go to Evelyn, and we all were lead to believe we were getting tracking devices injected. He made his decision to turn his back on his faction, and his friends." Shauna says.

"So, he made one bad choice. Ok, I admit it was huge, but we're going to seriously consider banishing him after he helped to save her?" Zeke asks.

"Edgar saved her. Four allowed her to be tested after they had tortured her by putting her in a sim that first allowed me to kill her, and then made her watch as I died." I add. "He blamed me for her death before he found out she was actually alive."

"You should have gotten there quicker." Four interjects.

"And if you cared as much as you said you did, you should have broken her out of there. You had that ability!" I yell.

"And go where, Eric? I was unarmed, as she would have been, and we would have needed to get through all of the armed factionless and Erudite. Brilliant planning on your part."

"He needs to go. There's nothing more that we need to hear from him." I say and Jack has him unhooked from the lie detector and escorted back to his cell, leaving just Dauntless leadership in the small room.

"I'm willing to take a vote, and I'll start. He's made factionless." I say.

Tris and Zeke exchange a look before Tris begins speaking. "You're just going to throw him out like trash? He risked his life to help me there. He was fucking mind controlled! He was tortured just like I was for _much_ longer than I was. Do any of you know what kind of mind fuck that is? Anyone? Do any of you know how it feels to have no fucking clue what is real anymore? If _I_ can see the good in him after all he did to me, why can't any of you?" Tris yells.

"Tris, you're making this personal. No matter what, he's a faction traitor, and this is the standard punishment." Tori says.

" _I'm_ making it personal? I would venture to say I'm not the only one in this room to do so." Tris spits as she stares at me.

"We aren't fighting about this. We have to treat him like any other faction traitor Tris. Do I like the man? No. Do I appreciate what he did to help you? Of course I do. But, none of that can be taken into consideration if we are to follow the law." I say.

"Bullshit. If that were the case, Jack would have sentenced him personally. He gave us that right for a reason." Tris replies.

"She's right. Jack gave us the right to sentence him because Four's in a grey area right now." Zeke adds.

"Grey area? Really? He left our faction, one that he had been trusted to lead may I remind you, of his own free will. That seems pretty black and white to me." I scoff.

"He left to be with his mother." Shauna replies.

"You too Shauna? Really? Again, just because he had a fucked up childhood he gets a free pass?" I ask in frustration.

"Do you even listen to yourself when you talk? Jesus Christ, Eric! Get out of your damn feelings and take a minute to actually look at his fucked up childhood as you call it. His father beat the hell out of both of them, so much that his mother left and faked her death. So, she leaves a nine year old there with a monster. That's what he got to deal with, a father who hated him and beat him and a mother who abandoned him. You heard him earlier, he _killed_ his own father in self defense. Tell me if you were raised believing that no one loved you or so much as gave a damn about you it wouldn't fuck you up. She offered him the one thing he was lacking, which was unconditional love. Eric, he _knew_ that Tris didn't love him." Zeke says as I look up at him sharply. "Was it a mistake for him to leave? Of fucking course it was, but she used his vulnerability against him. Tell me you've never made a decision based on emotion instead of logic."

"This isn't about me." I reply.

"You murdered Jeanine because of what she did to your family. She deserved it, and so much more, but what you did still broke the law. You were given a pass, because of the _emotional_ circumstances that preceded the act. If it applies to you, why can't it apply to him?" Zeke asks, and glancing around the room I see his words having an affect on the others.

"Again, this isn't about me!" I shout.

"God, you're a stubborn ass. You are jealous, and you're afraid she's going to leave you for him." He rolls his eyes. "She was raised to be selfless, you idiot. She's not in love with him, she's appreciative of what he did to help her, and she's _forgiven_ him. You are allowing your jealousy to cloud your opinion."

"What makes you think you can talk to me like this?" I ask. I'm pissed at this point, who the fuck does he think he is?

"Someone needs to. Get your head out of your ass." He yells as he slams his fist down on the table.

"If this were any one of us in this room who were in his shoes, would you be so adamant to banish us?" Shauna asks.

"You're asking me to set a precedence. This tells our faction that if they show outright disloyalty, they can just come right back as long as they perform a good deed." I explain with frustration.

"So, helping to save my life was just a good deed. I'm glad to know that you think so highly of me." Tris sneers.

"Tris, for fucks sake!" I yell. "I'm done with this conversation. I ultimately have the decision no matter how it's voted. He's not coming back to Dauntless."

"No, you don't get to do that. You don't get to abuse your power!" Tris yells.

"Careful Tris." I warn but I can see the fire in her eyes.

"I'm telling you right now, if you send him back out to those animals I'm going with him." Tris says.

"Are you out of your goddamn mind? Listen to yourself!" I say, unable to keep my anger at bay.

"He saved my life! You're just going to ignore that! They could kill him!" She yells.

" _I_ saved your life!" I yell. "I risked my own life to get you away from Jeanine after _he_ left you there. Did you forget that Tris? I don't give a fuck about mind control, because had he _not_ left his faction and become a fucking traitor this wouldn't have happened!"

"How can you be so heartless?" She asks.

"You should ask yourself that right now. If you want to go be factionless with him then fucking go. Live a happy life. You're no better than him for turning your back on your faction and the person you _claim_ to love." I retort.

"You're willing to banish him from Dauntless because you're jealous?!" She yells.

"I'm leading our faction, and showing that if you turn your back on it it's a permanent decision." I reply.

"I turned myself in to the factionless. I willingly left our faction. Are you going to banish me too, Eric?" She challenges. "Go ahead, show everyone how much of a powerful and ruthless leader you are. Kick everyone out that doesn't fit in to the perfect soldier mold that you've come to expect from each of us."

"Tris, that's unfair." Tori says.

"No, it's completely fair, right Eric? I mean, you don't want to set the precedence that it's ok for one of your subordinates to disobey you, right? Like I did when I snuck out of our bed and turned myself over to Evelyn?"

"Enough!" I yell. "This is insane. You all can fucking vote, I won't _abuse_ _my_ _power._ You want to choose him, then so be it. I'm done with this conversation, and I'm done with you Tris." I stand up and leave the room, slamming the door behind me.


	18. Chapter 18

**AN: Thank you all for the reviews, I love hearing from you all and getting your opinions and feedback.**

 **Just a reminder, I don't own these characters, just my ideas. The talented Veronica Roth gave us these great characters, and I enjoy taking them and making my own interpretations of them and their stories. Thank you for reading.**

Tris POV

I look around the room at the stunned faces of the other leaders. The sound of the door slamming still reverberates in my ears, along with the words he angrily spoke as he left the room.

"We should probably vote." I say.

"Tris..." Shauna says.

"I mean, unless you all think we should discuss it more. Maybe we should, I'd like to hear what you all think as well." I reply.

"Maybe we should all take a break, get some air or something?" Zeke says giving me a sympathetic look.

"Yeah, some air would do us all some good. This room is quite stuffy." Tori says as she stands up.

"No! We can't just take a break while someone's future rests in our hands!" I yell.

"Tris..." Shauna says again.

"No, don't start with me..." I reply but Shauna cuts me off.

"I most definitely _will_ start with you! What in the hell were you thinking? What part of you thought it would be OK to threaten to become factionless?" Shauna asks loudly.

"He was going to veto any vote we put forth!" I yell.

"YOU DON'T KNOW THAT!" Shauna screams. It's a tone I've never heard the entire time I've known her, nor do I ever want to hear it again. I sit back in my chair and nervously wring my hands. "I don't even want to pretend to know what you've gone through Tris, and I won't sit here and even attempt to understand how what you experienced in Erudite bonded you and Four, but I _do_ understand watching Eric run himself ragged trying to make a plan to rescue you when you left without so much as a note. We all watched him fall apart when he was told you _were dead_! I've known him for almost three years now, most of that time I couldn't stand him because he is an arrogant asshole who I thought was incapable of feeling anything, but he was _broken_ when he thought he lost you. He risked his life, several times, to save yours! As soon as he gets you back, you threaten to leave him because you're afraid he's going to kick your ex boyfriend out of the faction that he willingly defected from? What the hell is wrong with you?"

"He wasn't going to let him stay." I reply weakly.

"He was _one_ vote. Do you honestly think if we had of been able to discuss this like rational adults he would have vetoed a majority vote just because he doesn't like Four?" Tori asks.

"He's a jealous guy, this is something that he's never hidden well, and you knew it getting into this with him. The two of you turned this discussion into a fight within your relationship instead of discussing it like the leaders we've been trusted to be. I will give him credit where it's due, he did try at least. And honestly Tris, what reaction did you think you'd get when you threatened to become factionless to be with your ex boyfriend? That was low, even if his reaction was bullshit. You never gave him a chance, and you surely didn't respect him as your leader. He's done more for this faction than anyone, and you treated him like a petulant child." Shauna adds.

I look over at Zeke and his expression is unreadable. "You going to lay into me too?" I ask.

"Although you deserve for me to, especially since you're both being idiots, Shauna and Tori already said all that needed to be said." He turns his attention away from me before speaking again. "As much as we'd all like for Tris and Eric to fix their shit, it's irrelevant to the real matter at hand. We should discuss Four. As Tris pointed out, his future rests in our hands." Zeke replies.

"The first real item to discuss is whether we are willing to break protocol regarding the punishment for a faction traitor." Tori says. "This is going to be difficult, because every single person in this room cares about Four, and it's hard to be objective when there are feelings involved." Tori looks straight at me. "Can you be objective based on the fact that you have history with him, and feelings for him?"

"My answer is yes, but I need to expand on that. I have history with Four, but you're wrong with your assumption that I have feelings for him. I was never in love with him, and as Zeke pointed out earlier even Four knew that. Everyone in this room is on an even playing field when it comes to how we care for him. I'm not going to show any bias just because he and I were involved physically in the past." I reply.

"Not everyone in this room was willing to become factionless with him to prove a point. You've got to keep your emotions in check. You know I love you like my own family, but you're closer to everything that's happened than anyone else. If you can't separate your emotions, then remove yourself from the vote." Zeke says evenly.

My first reaction is to be angry, but before I let my mouth get me into even more trouble today I take a deep breath. Zeke is right, I'm emotionally charged right now, and any vote I'd put forth would be based on that instead of the actual crime.

"Zeke is right, I'm too emotionally affected by this vote to have an unbiased opinion. Eric shouldn't be the one removed from voting, it should be me." I reply.

"No, it should be both of you. He's too close to this too. He has just as much history with Four as you do, except his borders on hatred. Tris, are you obstaining from the vote?" Shauna asks.

I take another deep breath and think about everything that's been said. They are absolutely right, both Eric and I tried to almost bully the other leaders into voting the way we wanted them to. We were all elected for a reason, and this is the time for that reason to shine. We can trust them to make unbiased, informed and fair decisions without our influence.

"Yes, I am obstaining from the vote. I want to apologize to you all for allowing my personal issues to bleed into the true issues at hand. I trust each of you. Thank you." I stand up to leave.

"We won't let either of you down." Tori says. I finally gather my courage and walk out of the room.

I leave the room with my stomach in knots. There is so much on my mind, between Caleb's upcoming execution, the deliberations regarding Tobias and most importantly my relationship with Eric, everything is weighing so heavily that I feel like I can break at any time. I turn the corner and see Eric walking in my direction. As soon as our eyes meet, he turns on his heel and walks briskly in the opposite direction.

"Eric, can we talk, please?" I call out and he continues to walk. I jog to catch up to him, then reach for his arm and pull him to a stop. I move so I'm facing him. "Please, let's talk about this."

"I have nothing to say to you." He replies coldly.

"Please talk to me." I beg.

He looks down at me and I can see the pain in his eyes. "Is this work related?" He asks.

"I removed myself from the deliberations and voting about Four." I blurt out. Eric looks unaffected, his demeanor icy and his mask in place. I'm no longer talking to the man I love, I'm talking to the cold leader.

"Why?" He asks.

"I'm too emotionally charged to make an unbiased decision." I reply.

"Well, that's obvious. Anything else?" He asks coldly.

"I want to talk about what happened earlier. I want to talk about us."

"There is no _us._ If you have something additional that is work related to discuss I'm available. If not, we have nothing more to say to each other." He says in a quiet, but hard voice.

"You don't mean that. Eric, please, we love each other. We live together. Please." I reply.

"When we get back to Dauntless I'll assign you an apartment and you can get out of mine. Maybe I can just put you in with Four if they decide to let him back in. That'll save you from having to chase after him if he decides to try to leave again. If not, living arrangements will be a moot point since you'll both be factionless." He retorts.

"I don't want him! Please, listen to me, let me explain." I beg.

"Explain what exactly? This is what you wanted, right? Was I a good enough distraction for you?" He sneers.

"That's not fair." I reply weakly.

"Fair? The irony. What's not fair is you leaving me in the middle of the night, Tris. What's not fair is you almost fucking dying. Oh, and what's really not fair is the fact I've barely had you back with me and you want to throw everything we have away to be with him. Fuck you and what you think is fair." He jerks his arm away, and quickly disappears down the hall. I don't bother running after him this time.

I walk back to the courtroom in search of Edgar and I find him easily since most of the crowd has thinned out.

"Hey, is everything square?" He asks.

"I don't know, I removed myself from the deliberation and voting. I wasn't able to be unbiased." I reply.

"Well, that was very mature of you. What do you think will happen? What if a tie breaker is needed?"

"The decision was left up to Zeke, Shauna and Tori. Eric removed himself too." I reply.

"I gathered from Tobias' testimony that there's bad blood between he and Eric. Is this more than testosterone filled men fighting over the girl?" Edgar asks with a smirk.

"They have an unpleasant history." I reply robotically.

"Hey, what's wrong? What aren't you telling me?" Edgar asks.

"Maybe later." I say, feeling the sting of tears behind my eyes. "I'm going to see Caleb. Did you want to go?"

"Do you enjoy torturing youself, Tris?" He asks.

"I just want answers." I say quietly.

"He's not going to give you any. Nothing that wasn't said in this courtroom today. Come here." Edgar says as he holds out his arms to me. I fall into his embrace.

"I'm glad you're here." I whisper and he nods.

"Me too Tris. Me too." He replies. "I'm surprised Eric let you out of his sight." Edgar says and suddenly the reality of his last words to me begin to sink in as the first rogue tears slide quietly down my cheeks. Edgar looks down at me in surprise. "What's wrong?" He asks.

"He broke up with me."

"He did what? Why? When in the hell did you even have a chance to fight?" He asks.

"I'm such an idiot." I reply, crying harder. Edgar pulls me closer to him, and begins rubbing circles on my back. "This isn't me. I'm not the girl who breaks down crying all the damn time. I'm not the girl who cries over a break up."

"You are when that break up is with the person you love. Crying isn't weakness Tris, neither is asking for help. You've been through enough to warrant a river of your tears. What happened?" Edgar asks.

"I made a mistake. A huge mistake." I reply quietly.

"What did you do?"

"Eric was talking about making Tobias factionless instead of allowing him back into Dauntless."

Edgar sits up so he can look at me. "Ok, that seems like the proper punishment for being a faction traitor, were you upset that he felt that way?"

"Of course I was. If the law was so black and white, Jack would have never given us the decision regarding his sentencing. We were given that right because there is a grey area with everything he had been put through." I reply.

"Ok, I can see the logic in that, and I've gathered that sentencing for a crime is usually handled by Candor, but that still doesn't tell me how it led to the two of you breaking up." He replies.

"I threatened to leave Dauntless and become factionless if he didn't let Tobias come back." I quietly explain.

I can tell Edgar is angry when he begins speaking. "What on earth were you thinking? Do you know what it's like living that way?" I shake my head. "It's awful. You fight for food, for water, for survival. You can never relax because you never know when someone might kill you because they want what you have. It's survival of the fittest. Sure, Evelyn created her own little kingdom out there, but that wasn't reality." He replies. "Never mind that, do you have any idea the impact of what you said, Tris? You told the man who loves you that you would leave him for another man. Is that what you really want? Do you want to be with Tobias?"

"No. I love Eric more than anything. I fucked up so bad." I whisper.

"Have you tried talking to him since?" Edgar asks.

"Yes, but he didn't want to talk to me. He's done." I reply, and Edgar pulls me close to him.

"Do you make a habit of doing first and thinking later?" He asks.

"What do you mean?" I sniffle.

"Look, I know I'm new at this whole being your big brother thing, but just as an observation you seem to not be too concerned with the consequences of your actions until it's too late. You turned yourself in to Evelyn for crying out loud. Then the whole issue with you speaking before thinking with Eric. What's going on in that head of yours Tris?" He responds.

"I don't want people to get hurt, or worse, because of me." I reply.

"Does it not matter to you that sometimes _you_ are the one who is causing them pain?" He asks softly.

"I've never looked at it that way." I reply honestly.

"It's time that you started. Tris, I apologize if you feel that I'm overstepping here, but I can't just sit back and watch you self sabotage. I'm sorry about Caleb. I know that doesn't mean a whole lot in the grand scheme of things, but I am. He's a horrible person. There's nothing redeemable about him. He had a choice, and he chose to follow Jeanine. He chose to follow Evelyn. He chose to put science and his own self importance above his own blood. You always want to look for the very best in people, but some people are just awful and there's nothing you can do to change it. Whether you want to admit it or not, his betrayal is a catalyst for your recklessness now. It may have started with Tobias' betrayal, but it's escalated to a point beyond recognition with Caleb's betrayal of you. He deserves to die, Tris. He has almost, if not more blood on his hands than Jeanine and Evelyn combined. Let him pay for his sins."

We sit in silence for several minutes and I see Peter approaching us.

"Am I interrupting?" Peter asks. I shake my head. "It's getting late, I thought maybe you'd want to head to the guest quarters."

"Could you show Edgar where they are? I need to take care of something first." I reply vaguely. Peter cocks his head to the side and his lips turn down at the corners.

"You ok?" He asks.

"I'll be there soon, ok?" I reply and Peter shakes his head.

"The fact that you're already out of Eric's sight is troubling in itself, but I'm not going to be the one who leaves you alone and has to face his wrath. Come on, Stiff." He replies with a smirk.

"I can assure you that there will be no wrath. I'll see you later." I stand up and Peter puts his hand on my arm to stop me.

"What am I missing here Tris?" He asks, dropping his voice to a whisper.

"He broke up with me. I need to clear my head. Please." I reply, ignoring the look of shock on his face. "Please show my brother where he can stay, I'll be there later. I just need some space right now."

"I'll try to talk to him. Take the time you need, just be safe." Peter says, dropping his hand from my arm. I turn away and walk out the door. I automatically head to the basement, finding the familiar speaker box quickly. I press the button and hear a familiar voice.

"What ya need?"

"Hi Gavin, this is Tris Prior, I'm coming to check on our prisoners."

"Well I'll be! Let me buzz ya in." He replies as the door unlocks and I enter. I walk over and place my hand on the scanner and Gavin immediately opens the next door with a grin.

"You're a site for sore eyes Miss Prior. I'd heard some bad things." He says with downcast eyes. "Someone said you'd been killed during the battle."

"Call me Tris, and as you can see I'm still here." I offer a small smile.

"Which one are you here for?" He asks.

"Caleb Prior." I reply. Gavin shakes his head.

"He's refused visitors. I can tell him you're here if you want. He's not a very nice fellow though."

"No, he's not." I reply. "You know what, forget about him, if he wants to wallow in his own self pity before dying let him. He caused all of this. Can you take me to Tobias Eaton?"

"I can. Do we need to shackle him up for you?"

"No. Just let me into his cell, if that's allowed." I reply.

"Sure, he's only being held until one of you takes responsibility for him anyway." Gavin replies as he leads me to Tobias' cell. He punches in the code and opens the door. "I'll be right out here." He points to a small workstation built into the wall.

"Thank you." I reply as I close the door behind me. As soon as I turn around, Tobias' arms are around me.

"I thought they killed you." He breathes into my hair. "How? What happened?"

"Edgar. He gave me an adrenaline shot and took me to the hospital afterward." I reply as we make our way to his cot.

"I'm so sorry that I didn't get you out of there." He says.

"Stop. I don't want to hear apologies or talk about that anymore. We're both here now."

"I should have tried harder to get you out. Evelyn must have gotten word about their impending attack, because she had the building guarded heavily and her soldiers armed. It was a dangerous situation, and I was afraid that we'd be killed as soon as we stepped out of the building. I thought the best course of action was to wait for Dauntless to get there."

"That was the best course of action. We all made it out alive as a result." I reply.

"You wouldn't have if it hadn't been for Edgar's quick thinking. God Tris, do you ever think about how reckless you are?" He asks.

"I cannot hear this from you right now. Please. I came here to keep you company while you wait for the verdict. Can we not talk about death or dying for a while?" I ask. Tobias picks up on my anger and changes the subject.

"What's going to happen to me?" He asks.

"I'm not sure. Shauna, Tori and Zeke are deliberating now." I reply.

"Why aren't you and Eric a part of the deliberations?"

"We tried, but it got ugly. I am obstaining from voting because I cannot be unbiased. Eric removed himself from the decision completely." I reply.

"What happened to cause that? It's not like Eric to relinquish control." He replies.

"I kind of forced his hand." I reply, looking down at the floor.

"What did you do?" He asks.

"I told him if he made you factionless I was going with you."

"Why would you do that? What were you thinking?" He asks, tilting my head to look at him.

"I couldn't just let him throw you to the wolves like that. You helped save me. You got your mother to trust Peter, Will and Lynn. You did a lot of unforgivable things, but then we found out it was under mind control. You were a pawn in your parents war. I couldn't just turn my back on you."

"Thank you." He whispers and I nod. Before I can stop them, the tears begin pouring down my face.

Tobias puts his arms around me and I finally break down. My body shakes from the sobs that are ripping through me. I don't know how long we sit there together, but eventually my tears turn into sniffles. I'm faintly aware of Tobias rubbing my back.

"I feel so weak." I whisper. "I can't seem to stop fucking crying."

"You've been though so much. So fucking much. If you need to cry, then cry. It doesn't make you weak." He replies.

"I should go. It's late, and the executions are tomorrow morning first thing." I realize what I've said and turn to face him. "God, I'm sorry."

"Don't be. My mother died when I was nine years old. That woman who will be executed tomorrow morning is just a shell. I'm not sorry, and you damn sure shouldn't be." He replies, and by the look on his face I believe every word of what he's saying. "How are you really?"

I realize he's talking about Caleb. "How am I supposed to feel? I trusted him, I mean he's my brother Tobias. Everyone I trusted and loved turned their backs on me." I see him frown at my words. "I've forgiven you, but the truth is you turned your back when you decided to leave Dauntless. Caleb when he decided my life wasn't as important as his serum development, and now Er..." I feel tears threatening again. "I'm so damn weak."

"You're not weak, look at what you've gone through. You're a survivor. You're a warrior. You can't control the way people treat you, only the way you react." He replies.

"You're a good person." I reply. He gives me that crooked smile that used to make my heart melt. Now, it just feels like an old friend.

"So are you. You're the bravest person I know. I'm sorry I hurt you. You were a great girlfriend. I just hope Eric appreciates you and doesn't take you for granted like I did." He must notice the way my face falls. "What?" He asks.

"Eric broke up with me." I whisper, squeezing my eyes shut to avoid more tears. I can feel them leaking out of my eyes against my will.

"You can't be serious." He says and I nod. "Because of me?" I shrug my shoulders and he shakes me. "Look at me." I finally open my eyes. "Was it because you threatened to leave with me?" I can't speak so I nod my head.

He sighs deeply before continuing. "That had to be hard for him to hear. I can't imagine I would have reacted any better had the roles been reversed. Have you talked since?"

"Just enough for him to tell me that we could only talk about work related subjects...and he informed me that if we return to Dauntless he'd get me an apartment so I could get out of his." I reply through tears.

"Jesus. He's still a stubborn asshole I see. Talk to him again. If he needs time, give him some, but not so much that he thinks you don't care. You know he loves you, he admitted it under truth serum for fucks sake. Just try, this isn't what he could possibly want. I saw him when Evelyn told him you were dead. He was wrecked, it's nothing I've ever seen from him. He'll pull his head out of his ass." He says.

"What if he doesn't?"

"Then he can join the ranks of fools who let you go." He replies.

"Why are you trying to help? You hate him."

"I do. But you love him, and I know even though he's a prick he loves you too. I care about your happiness, even if it's not with me." He answers while absentmindedly rubbing his beard. "Tris, if they decide to make me factionless you are not coming with me."

"I know. As much as I don't want that to happen, I know I could never leave Eric. I'm hoping it won't come to that, I don't want you to become factionless. It's much too dangerous for you." I reply.

"If it happens, it happens. I made the choice to leave Dauntless, Tris, and I have to pay the consequences. I could always try to go to Amity. Johanna might let me stay there." He ponders.

"That's true. She's a kind woman. She was very helpful to me when I got the news about my parents." I reply softly.

"I'm so sorry." He whispers.

"I know. I've forgiven you. Please don't punish yourself anymore." I reply.

"Can you follow your own advice?" He asks solemnly.

"What do you mean?" I ask.

"You feel like you're responsible for everything and everyone, and when something happens your reactions are extreme. You're reckless with your life, Tris. You're a wild card when it comes to certain things. You punish yourself when its others who are at fault." He replies.

"That's all true." I nod. "Edgar pretty much gave me the same lecture right before I came down here to see you. I've been so unfair to Eric."

"When you left Dauntless, he had no idea did he?" He asks.

"No. I left in the middle of the night."

"Do you have any clue what that must have done to him? Waking up and you're just gone?"

"I didn't think. I was afraid that they'd given others the mind control serum, potentially even Eric. I didn't want anyone to die because of me."

"You need to be more careful with your life. You have a lot of people who care for you and love you, even if you're too stubborn to love yourself." He replies.

Tobias and I sit side by side on his cot with comfortable silence between us. We hear someone unlocking his door and are surprised to see Zeke walk in.

"Hey man." Zeke says to Tobias. "Hey Tris."

"I'll leave so you two can talk." I say but Zeke holds up his hand.

"You can stay, you should hear this too." He replies and I sit back down on the cot.

"We've come to a decision regarding your request to return to Dauntless." He begins. "We have decided to allow you to return, under probationary terms, for a minimum of one year."

"What are the terms?" Tobias asks excitedly.

"You will wear a tracking device. You will not be allowed to leave the compound without a leader. You will return to your job in the control room, under the supervision of Marlene, Lynn or Uriah at all times, you will be moved away from the leaders wing and be given an apartment with surveillance, you will have a curfew enforced at first and we can evaluate and potentially remove the curfew at a later time. If at any point you break any of the rules we set out for you, it will violate your probation and you will become factionless. Do you understand the terms Four?" Zeke replies.

"Yes, I do." He replies.

"I am personally taking responsibility for you. If you fuck up, it could mean I lose my leadership position, and I could be punished as well. Do you understand how serious this is? If you don't think you can live under the probationary terms, you need to not come back." Zeke says tightly.

"I won't fuck this up, you have my word, as your brother and your best friend. I'm so sorry I let you down." Tobias replies and Zeke's hard facade begins to crumble.

"You should be sorry, you asshole. You left without even saying goodbye." He smirks. Tobias jumps up from his cot and hugs Zeke, the two holding on for a few seconds before containing themselves. "I fucking missed you. I'm serious Four, don't screw me over."

"I won't. I promise you." Tobias replies with a smile.

"Alright man, you're free to go. Leadership along with several others are staying here overnight because of the executions tomorrow. You can stay too, there's an extra bed in mine and Shauna's room." Zeke offers.

"I want to stay. I need to be here for the executions tomorrow. It's my closure." He replies solemnly.

"Let's get out of here." Zeke replies as he bangs on the door. Gavin soon pops in.

"Gavin, we're out of here man. I've signed Eaton out, and we just need to be buzzed out of here." Zeke says with a grin that Gavin returns.

"Head back to the security bubble and Jenkins will get you squared away." Gavin replies and shakes both Zeke and Tobias' hand. I move to walk away but Gavin pulls me to the side. "I told Prior you were here, he wants to see you." He says. "I can put him in a visitors room, shackled and chained of course."

"Yes, please." I respond as he shows me into a room. I sit down and nervously wait for Caleb. Gavin soon ushers him in, chaining him tightly to the table and chairs before glancing over at me.

"Need me to stay?" He asks.

"No, but don't go too far away, please." I reply.

I finally look at Caleb and he looks utterly defeated. His posture is slumped, he has a vacant look on his face and his actions all betray how nervous he is. I look at the man I spent eighteen years of my life with and realize he's now a stranger.

"I'm sure you have a lot of questions." He says quietly.

"Did you really think I deserved to die Caleb?"

"I don't know what I believe anymore. I wanted to study how divergence worked. I wanted to cure it. I was careless with your life, and others before you." He replies wearily. "Science demands sacrifices though. Experiments don't always work."

"I'm your sister, and yet you made me just a science experiment." I state. He neither agrees or disagrees, he just stares blankly at the wall. "You programmed Tobias to kill our parents."

"Beatrice, I had no idea they were hiding there. I truly thought they had already made it to Amity. I stalled on sending the command to kill as long as I could. Jeanine believed that the council members that were hiding there were harboring divergent rebels."

"No matter who was hiding in that building, or what 'crimes' you thought they were guilty of, no one deserves to be gunned down in cold blood like that. You are guilty of murdering them! I can't even keep going in circles with you. I wish you were different. You were the only family I had left, but ultimately its your fault that I would be left alone." I reply. "Your war in the name of science at least showed me who my true family is."

"You don't understand..."

I cut him off. "You're not going to make me understand _murder_ Caleb. Especially when your cause was something _you_ didn't even understand. I was awake when you helped Edgar unhook the leads Caleb. You didn't even care that it was your sisters dead body. You disgust me. I've never been more disappointed in anyone or anything in my life than I was with you in that moment. I loved you, even when you didn't love me."

"I do love you Bea. I wanted to be somebody important. Jeanine gave that to me, she made me think I was the most brilliant scientist she'd ever seen. She gave me the freedom to explore my own leads when it came to research and developments."

"She manipulated you." I reply.

"I don't think she did Bea..."

"So you believe that killing Divergents was the way to do things? Creating a war to overthrow our parents faction?"

"We're not getting anything accomplished by arguing. For what it's worth, I am sorry I was so callous towards you."

I nod, knowing this is a much of an apology as I will get from Caleb. He truly doesn't have remorse.

"I am too. Goodbye Caleb." I stand up and open the door before Caleb can respond, causing Gavin to jump from the workstation where he'd been waiting.

"Everything ok?" He asks.

"I'm done. Thank you Gavin, for always being kind." I reply with a smile before I leave the basement in a daze.


	19. Chapter 19

Eric POV

I wake up with a start and check my tablet for the time. It's a little before five am, and a figure in the bed across the room catches my eye. It's Tris. I have no idea when she snuck in here, but I do know I don't want to talk to her. I quietly slip out of bed, and make my way to the bathroom.

I shower in silence, grateful for the few minutes I can spend truly alone and with my thoughts. I want to get out of Candor and back to Dauntless. Even though I know it will take months to get not only Dauntless back on its feet, but Abnegation as well, I welcome the work. I need something to think about that doesn't involve Tris. The one time I actually allow myself to open up to someone and actually feel something, my heart gets ripped apart. Never again.

Tris. Why'd I let myself get close to her? I told myself that all of the one night stands I'd had leading up to her were a mistake, but with the pain I'm dealing with now I realize my mistake was her. I can't help the tears that seem to continuously fall. What the fuck is wrong with me? I let the hot water wash over me and I'm lost in my own thoughts when I hear the bathroom door open and the sound of giggling. Once I hear voices, I realize it's Zeke and Shauna. They're one of those couples that others strive to be: they grew up together in Dauntless, they were the best of friends when we all started our initiation class, they got together romantically during initiation and married right afterward. They are a strong couple, you can look at them and see how much they love and respect each other, and they are able to keep their personal and professional lives separate. Something that I wish I could do.

After I exit the shower and get dressed, I make my way to the sink to brush my teeth. I look up in the mirror and I don't recognize the face staring back at me. My eyes are bloodshot and swollen, a result of several moments of weakness with me breaking down crying both last night and this morning in the shower. I splash some cold water on my face before brushing my teeth, and soon Zeke and Shauna step out from their shower stall and join me at the row of sinks.

"Hey man, you don't look so good." Zeke says.

"Yeah, you look like shit." Shauna adds.

"Are you sure your aptitude test result wasn't Candor?" I ask and she glares at me.

"Very funny. Have you two talked?" She asks.

"There's nothing to talk about. She made her decision. I'm sure she's extremely happy that he'll be back in Dauntless with her." I reply.

"You also made a decision, you ended your relationship in front of all of us if you recall." Shauna retorts.

"Oh, should I have waited until she left with him before breaking up with her? Since I don't do relationships I don't exactly know what the proper etiquette is to end one when your girlfriend decides to leave you, and your home, for another man." I don't even care if they see how pissed I am right now.

"She made a mistake." Zeke begins. "She regrets it too. She's miserable."

"It's all well and good that we all know she made a mistake, but does _she_ know she made a mistake? Because she's certainly not said those words to me." I reply.

"Have you given her a chance to say them to you?" Zeke asks.

I stare at Zeke through the mirror. He stands behind me, arms crossed and face emotionless with his mouth set in a line.

"Like I said, she's not said them to me." I reply evenly and watch as Zeke throws his hands up and rolls his eyes while shaking his head.

"You are being unnecessarily difficult." Zeke replies. "You act like you've never made a mistake Eric. No ones perfect man."

"It doesn't matter, the damage is done." I reply as I return to brushing my teeth. Watching Zeke shake his head behind me is annoying, so I finally snap. "Look, I don't do relationships and this is further proof as to why I shouldn't. We were only together a month or so and look how fucked up it was."

"You two should at least sit down and have an adult conversation. Regardless of how long the two of you were actually together, it's obvious that you love each other and this is the real thing. Why throw it all away over an argument?" Zeke asks.

I finish brushing my teeth before answering. "An argument? So, if Shauna had of did to you what Tris did to me, you'd think it was just an argument?" I ask angrily.

"Look man, I'm not trying to piss you off. I can't say I'd react any differently than you did if I'm being honest, but I'd talk to her. This girl here is the love of my life, and I knew I was gonna marry her when we were thirteen. We've had more fights than I can even remember, bad ones, but we always talked about them before making a decision that could affect the rest of our lives." Zeke replies.

"He's right. We are happily married, but this relationship and any other takes work. If we had of just given up the first major fight we'd had we would have never even gotten married. We wouldn't have this life. Eric, we're not saying it's your fault, so please don't take it that way. If you love her, fight for her, and stop fighting with her." Shauna says.

"I've got to go see Jack." I reply coldly as I head for the door. I catch a glimpse of Shauna shaking her head and throwing her hands in the air as I walk out.

I make it to Jack's office and his assistant gestures for me to go right in.

"Ah, good morning Eric." Jack greets. I'm surprised to see both Tori and Tris sitting across from his desk.

"Good morning Jack. I know that I'm early, but I wanted to make sure everything was in line for the executions today. I hope that doesn't cause an inconvenience." I say, keeping my focus entirely on him.

"Not at all, I appreciate your punctuality. As I was just explaining to Tori and Tris, we've had your firearms brought in, we will have them out for your inspection before the executions begin. I thought we could begin with Caleb Prior, and then Evelyn Eaton. There will be time in between to clean, but our crew is very fast, so no more than thirty minutes." Jack rattles this off in a very matter-of-fact way, obvious they've done this many times before.

"What happens to the bodies?" Tris asks. I glance over at her for the first time this morning and I recognize the look on her face. This is exactly how she looked when she found out her parents were killed. I look away before she can catch my eyes.

"We send them to Erudite for incineration." Jack replies easily.

"Thank you Jack, if you could just point us in the direction of where our firearms are we can get the inspection over with. Zeke and Shauna should be joining us shortly." I reply.

"Yes, right this way." I follow Jack from the room as he leads us to a secure area. He ushers us into another room and gestures towards the cases in the table. "Here are the keys. Feel free to let us know if you need anything." He says before turning on his heel and leaving the room.

"The weapons should all be unloaded right now. We just need to ensure that they are, and that they are clean, assembled properly and that the firing mechanism is working." I say and Tori nods her head. Tris just stares at me, and I look away, focusing on the weapon in my hands.

"Any issues to report?" Zeke asks as he and Shauna enter the room.

"No issues, everything is in order." Tori replies. "There's two left if you want to inspect those."

We work in silence, the only noises in the room are coming from the weapons themselves.

"We have twenty five minutes before the first execution. They're starting with Caleb." I say and I watch as Tori's eyes immediately flit to Tris.

"I'm a leader, I can do this." She says, but the inflection in her voice betrays the actual pain she's in.

"Tris, no one will think poorly if you if you sit the first one out." Zeke remarks.

"No, I was chosen to lead this faction with you all. I don't need special treatment. Caleb was convicted of his crimes, and we as leaders are responsible for his punishment." She replies.

I watch as the myriad of emotions play out in her eyes and on her face. In this moment, I want to reach out for her, but all I can think about is the callous way she treated our relationship when she threatened to leave with him. I shake the thoughts away and stare at the wall.

We quietly wait the last few minutes until some guards arrive to escort us to the staging area. We find a table, with five guns laying on it, each with their safety on. There's no indication of which gun has the bullet in the chamber. I look out past through the glass wall to the witness gallery and find all of our Dauntless friends, including Marlene and Christina, waiting patiently. They're all wearing almost identical stoic looks. We wait silently as they bring Caleb in, heavily chained.

After the guards leave, Jack takes his place directly in front of Caleb and begins speaking.

"Caleb Prior, you have been sentenced to death as punishment for your war crimes. Do you have anything to say before your sentence is carried out?" Jack asks.

"I'm not ashamed." He says in a loud and proud voice. I glance over and out of the corner of my eye I can see Tris' composure falter a bit out, but she quickly recovers.

We each pick up a weapon and surround Caleb in a half circle. All you can hear in the room is Caleb's heavy breathing and the clicks of each of us removing the safety of our weapons. Jack moves to a far corner of the room and begins his countdown.

Five...

Four...

Three...

Two...

One...

We pull our triggers and the sound of the gun firing reverberates through the small room. Caleb's limp body falls to the floor, the gunshot wound in the back of his head prominent. I look up at the smoke coming from the gun in Tris' hand, and meet her conflicted eyes.

Fuck. A one in five chance, and she had the bullet.

She's holding herself together well. She keeps her eyes locked on mine, refusing to look at Caleb. The curtains behind us are closed, and then his body is quickly taken away. I watch the other leaders return their weapons to the table. The cleaning crew rushes in, and begins their scrubbing and sanitizing process while completely ignoring the fact that we are still in the room. Tris is frozen, so I approach her and gently take her gun and deposit both weapons on the table. I take her hand in mine and lead her from the room.

We make it as far as the hallway, where Tori, Zeke and Shauna are all leaning on the wall. We join them, Tris standing by my side holding onto my hand tightly.

"You ok?" Shauna asks Tris.

"No, but I will be. I needed time to mourn the brother I loved, but the man I just killed was _not_ the brother I loved. He was a war criminal who deserved to die for his crimes. I've been mourning the loss of my brother for awhile now." She replies.

"Yes, he was a war criminal, of the worst kind. I'm sorry for the loss of your brother." Shauna replies. Zeke and Tori nod.

"Thank you." She replies.

"Eric, could I have a word with you in my office?" Jack asks as he enters the hallway. I let go of Tris' hand and follow Jack. He gestures to one of the chairs in front of his desk as he takes a seat behind his desk.

"We need to postpone Evelyn Eaton's execution." He says.

"What, why?" I ask.

"She claims to know there whereabouts of Marcus Eaton." Jack replies.

"Marcus Eaton is dead, you heard Four's testimony. He killed him."

"Tobias Eaton told the truth, he shot his father in self defense and believed he was dead. There is the possibility that he wasn't dead when Tobias left him. One of my co-leaders interrogated her earlier and she has agreed to go under truth serum to disclose everything she knows about Marcus." He explains.

"What have you promised her in return?" I ask.

"Eric, she offered the information about Marcus without being asked. She could have taken that information to her grave without any of us being the wiser." He replies.

"Jack, what is she asking for in return?" I ask.

"A memory wipe and being allowed to return to the factionless." He replies.

"Absolutely not! She is responsible for the war, and she attempted to kill Tris." I reply. "You can inject her and interrogate her without needing her permission."

"By law, we cannot at this juncture. She has already been convicted and sentenced for her crimes, if we were to inject her again against her will she'd have an argument for an appeal of her sentence." Jack explains.

"How? What could she possibly appeal?" I ask.

"If we were to inject a convicted criminal against their will, and any talk of their previously sentenced crimes were to come up it would be double jeopardy. It's happened before Eric, several times in fact, and we had no choice but to overturn convictions that should have _never_ been overturned. Marcus Eaton is a prime example. We had him convicted of child abuse, and when he offered addiontal information regarding alleged corruption in Abnegation we injected him without permission. He set us up, there was no corruption in Abnegation, and he was able to bring up details of his abuse case. Double jeopardy was applied and he was cleared of all charges. This is why the stipulation is in place that if we get documented permission from the convicted criminal, we have free reign to ask any questions about any of their previous crimes." Jack explains.

"I don't want that woman to be allowed to live." I reply angrily.

"If we memory wipe her she's no longer a danger to anyone." He reasons.

"Except when her loyal followers talk the new and improved Evelyn into picking the war up where she left off. What if she's lying about Marcus? What if she's setting us up just like he did?" I ask.

"You're willing to potentially allow that man to continue to evade capture and endanger everyone? He has more of a thirst for blood and power than Evelyn and Jeanine combined. He's also the only living leader of Abnegation, and likely a divergent himself. He could come back and claim power over that faction at any time." Jack replies.

"Let him, if he's truly alive and can come here and beat the truth serum, we put him through the lie detector too." I reply. "Jack, no ones seen or heard from him since before Jeanine was killed. I don't think he's alive, and to answer your question yes I'm willing to take my chances." I reply.

"This will require a full council vote. I brought you in here to discuss it as a courtesy to you, and because you and Tris were probably the most affected by her actions. We will need to get Amity representation here, along with Abnegation." Jack replies.

"There is no Abnegation." I reply and Jack shakes his head.

"Physically, no, the entire sector is ruined. But there are many survivors in Amity, and Johanna has been working with them to get organized and they've at least elected a representative of the group." He replies.

"This is ridiculous, but if it's the law so be it. What do we do in the meantime?" I ask.

"Your group is welcome to stay here, the two young ladies who arrived this morning brought changes of clothes and supplies for your group already." He gestures towards the several large duffel bags sitting on the floor of his office. "I should be able to organize the meeting for first thing tomorrow morning, and depending on its outcome we will deal with Evelyn accordingly afterward." He replies.

"Fine. I need to tell the rest of the leaders." I reply.

"I had a guard escort them to a conference room. Once you leave my office, it's three doors down on the left." He replies. I nod and leave his office.

As soon as I enter the conference room all conversation stops, and I awkwardly realize they must have been talking about me. I ignore that and focus on the issue at hand.

"Evelyn's execution has been postponed. She offered intel on Marcus Eaton in exchange for receiving the memory serum and being returned to the factionless." I begin.

"No, that cannot happen." Tori replies.

"Marcus is dead, Tobias killed him. We all heard that." Tris says. I cringe at hearing his name come out of her mouth.

"Evelyn claims he's alive. She won't offer any more details without a deal." I reply.

"She absolutely cannot return to the factionless. Memory wipe or not, she's dangerous." Shauna says.

"I don't want it to happen. Without explaining all of the bullshit legal loopholes involved, I'm going to tell you what our options are. Jack is calling a full leadership meeting tomorrow to vote, and if we vote to stick with the original sentence and execution Evelyn cannot be forced under truth serum. It's possible that whatever knowledge she has of Marcus' whereabouts, if it's even true, will die with her. Or, we vote to give her a chance under truth serum, and get whatever information she knows, and give her the deal." I explain.

"So if she doesn't know shit, and that comes out under truth serum, why can't we execute her?" Zeke asks.

"If she was forced under truth serum and there's anything said about her war crimes conviction while she's under truth serum, it presents double jeopardy as Jack explained it. Her conviction would be overturned." I explain.

"And she could never be tried for the war crimes again." Tris finishes and I nod.

"These are individual votes, so we don't have to agree to one faction vote. Just keep in mind as long as she goes under truth serum under her own will she gets the deal. If we vote against that, we execute her and take our chances that Marcus is really out there somewhere. Do you have any questions?"

"I take it we are staying here again tonight?" Tori asks.

"You're free to go home as long as you're back here by 8am." I reply.

"No thank you. I'll just ask my husband to close the shop and come here. I've barely seen him since all of this started." She replies.

"Yeah, tell Bud to come here, it'd be nice for the two of you to spend time together even if the circumstances aren't ideal." Shauna says and Tori nods.

"You should probably talk to Tobias." Tris says, looking directly at me.

"Why do I need to talk to him?" I ask, trying to keep my anger in check.

"You want to know if there's a chance that Marcus is still alive, and he's the one who said he killed him. If you talk to him, you could find out exactly what happened with him and Marcus, and you can see if he left Marcus in a state where his life could have been saved without Tobias' knowledge." She replies.

I glare at her, but as I let my anger subside I realize she's right. Before I can answer, she begins speaking again.

"I could talk to him if it'd be easier." She says.

"Like you need an excuse to talk to your boyfriend." I bite out and Shauna glares at me across the table.

"I have no boyfriend, but that wasn't my decision. If you don't want to deal with him, I could. Or any of the other leaders could I'm sure." Tris replies in an even voice.

"Anything else?" I ask and receive head shakes from everyone. I leave the room quickly and realize that for me to really make an informed decision about Evelyn I'm going to need to talk to Four.

I stop walking and wait for Zeke to exit the room, and I reach out to stop him.

"Where's Four?" I ask. He looks at me and shakes his head.

"Kicking his ass isn't going to help anything." He answers.

"I need to talk to him, about Evelyn and Marcus. That's it." I reply. Zeke studies me for a moment longer before answering.

"I'll find him. Come to my room in thirty minutes." He replies before walking away with Shauna. I begin to walk down the hall and feel a hand on my arm.

"Eric, can we please talk?" Tris asks.

"What do you want now?" I ask.

"You. I want you. Please can we talk about what's happened?" She asks.

"No. I'm fucking angry Tris. I can't do this with you. I have too much to focus on right now and I don't need you or your bullshit distractions. Leave me alone." I spit.

"Eric, I love you and I know that you love me. We need to talk about this." She begs.

"No. I'm not going to talk about this with you. Not now, and not ever. I am done Tris." I begin to walk away but she jumps in front of me.

"Eric, I love you and I want to be with you. You can't tell me you don't feel the same."

"When will you get this through your head? I don't want you Tris. I don't want to be with you. I'll admit, you were an amazing fuck, but distraction time is over. You have who you want back, and I have a job to do. I don't want you." I reply icily. I watch as her face crumbles.

"You don't mean that." She says as her tears start pouring down her face.

"I do mean it. We were a distraction for each other, and we got caught up in the moment. It's done, and we can go back to real life now." I reply. "Look, I'm sorry about Caleb, but I'm not here to continue to distract you from the things you don't want to deal with. You have Four, go be with him."

"You were never a distraction. Never. Stop downplaying your feelings for me and for us." She cries as she reaches for me. I walk away and hear her yell behind me. "You love me."

"No, I don't love you. This should have never happened. Now, leave me the hell alone." I reply as I finally walk away, leaving her sobbing behind me.

I block that entire conversation from my mind and head towards Zeke's room. When I get there, the door is open and Zeke and Four are sitting on opposite beds, talking quietly.

"Come on in." Zeke says and I step in the room, sitting on the bed next to Zeke. Four and I stare at each other, neither of us talking or looking away.

"Look, stop trying to intimidate each other and fucking talk. I'd like to actually eat lunch before it's time for dinner." Zeke says.

"You can go." I reply.

"No, I'm staying. We don't need another murderer to sentence. Talk." He replies.

"Your mother claims your father is alive." I say to Four.

"She's lying. He's dead. I shot him through his chest at close range. He had no pulse when I left him there." He replies.

"How do I know you're telling me the truth?" I ask.

"I admitted it with the lie detector. What did I have to gain by admitting that? I could have been executed for it. He's dead, I shot him and checked his pulse before I left him there." He replies.

"How long did you stay with his body? Could someone have saved him?" I ask.

"I admit, I didn't stay long. I was trying to get away. He would have needed immediate medical attention, and it would have needed to be in Erudite's hospital. There was no way a field medic could have saved him." He replies.

"So, the theory is that someone rescued him immediately and got him to Erudite?" Zeke asks.

"How close were you to Erudite?" I ask.

"Fifteen minutes walking." He replies.

"So it's possible, but not probable." Zeke replies.

"Yeah, my thoughts exactly." I agree.

"What's Evelyn asking for?" Four asks.

"Memory wipe and to return to the factionless." I reply.

He leans against the wall, and appears to be deep in thought. "Wiping her memory won't change her personality. She wants power and control, and with the support of her loyal followers she'd be right where she was before. I say you execute her. If Marcus is alive by some chance, we can deal with him. I killed him on my own, so if he did manage to get the medical attention he needed he's not going to be hard to take down with an army of Dauntless."

"Why should we trust you?" I ask.

"You came to me to talk about them, and now you're doubting I can be trusted?" He retorts.

"It's no secret that you hate me. Why wouldn't I believe you're trying to set me up?" I ask.

"I have one very important reason to never cause you any harm." He replies evenly.

"And what might that be?" I ask.

"Tris."

"Why? She chose to be with you anyway. What could keeping me alive do for you?" I scoff.

"She didn't choose to be with me, she wants you. She loves you. I care enough for her to never want to hurt her again. If I were to cause anything to happen to you, it would destroy her." He replies. "I love Tris. That's already out in the open. If I thought I had a chance with her, I wouldn't hesitate. I don't, not because she is with you, but because she doesn't want to be with me. I have zero chance to be with her. Get that through your thick skull. She only wants you. If you let her go, you are a fool."

"If you want her, go for it. Take your chances. She's not going to wait for me, and she's surely not going to hold on to something that has no hope. We're done here." I reply as I stand to leave.

"You're an idiot." Four says loudly as I walk out of the room.

I spend the rest of the evening discussing tomorrow's leadership meeting with Jack, and avoiding everyone else. I manage to slip into the cafeteria and eat without incident.

As I make my way back to my room, Peter falls into step with me.

"You ready to talk yet?" He asks.

"Nothing to talk about." I reply as I keep walking.

He follows me to my room, and before I can shut the door behind me he's inside.

"Tris. Talk about her. It's time." He says, making himself comfortable on the bed across from mine.

"It's over. It was a mistake. It was a distraction that went too far. There, I talked about it." I reply.

"Right, so to answer my original question you're not ready to talk about her." He retorts.

"Why does everyone keep pushing me to talk about her?" I ask.

"Because you're in love with her and you're pushing her away. She told me she's tried to talk to you several times. Oh, and really smart move to tell her you don't love her. It took Chris and me three hours to get her to stop crying about that." He replies angrily. "Look, I know you're a fucking bastard, but I'm still in shock you'd say something that fucking cruel to her."

"Why are you so convinced that I'm in love with her?" I retort.

"You're seriously asking that question? Oh let's see Eric, how about I knew it when Jeanine had her in Erudite, you know when you'd sneak into her cell and hold her while she was having nightmares. Or I don't know, risking your life to get her away from Jeanine? Or, how about when you shot Max point blank because he was about to hurt her? Or, in Abnegation when no one but you could get near her for the first two days? Or, when she had that first nightmare about you that you absolutely lost your shit afterward? Or, maybe it's when you admitted to being in love with her under truth serum Eric! Or, how fucked up you've been ever since..."

"Shut up!" I yell and Peter actually jumps. "Why do any of you even care? It's my fucking life!"

"Wake up Eric! People actually care about you. Newsflash, you have friends! Oh and maybe we all liked you a hell of a lot more when you actually let it be known you have a fucking heart. Get over yourself and talk to her. She wants to apologize to you, fucking let her! Are you _trying_ to force her back to Four? Because, here's another newsflash for you: she doesn't want to be with him! Christina and I just spent the last three fucking hours talking to the girl that _you_ should be talking to. Chris and I spent three hours convincing her that you really do love her, and that you're just lashing out because you're hurt right now. Yeah, three hours saying all of the words _you_ should be saying to her. She's a great girl, you know it, so stop torturing her. Stop torturing yourself. The bottom line is that you two can continue to be the two most miserable single people in the history of mankind, or you can both remove your heads from your asses and be together." He takes a deep breath as he finishes. "Great, now you're giving me the death glare. Say something. Use your words Eric."

"I'd like to get some sleep." I say as I start to undress.

"Seriously dude? You're stripping?" He asks. "I'm right here!"

"You're in my room. I'm getting ready for bed." I reply. "I sleep naked." I look straight at him as I slip my fingers in the waistband of my boxers.

"You're an asshole." Peter yells as he quickly leaves the room.

I toss my boxers on the floor and get into bed, staring up at the ceiling and willing my overactive mind to shut up.

All I can think about is her.


	20. Chapter 20

Eric POV

Why did Peter have to come in here and get to me? I'm so sick of hearing about how I'm making this huge mistake. Maybe the reason I'm so sick of hearing it is because it's true. Fuck. I can't stop thinking about her at all.

I throw the covers off and get out of bed, pacing in the small room. If I'm being honest with myself, I know damn good and well that she wasn't a distraction. I've wanted her for awhile, and not just to fuck her. I mean, she _is_ amazing in bed, that part was completely true, but me telling her I didn't love her was a mistake.

So is this an eye for an eye? Did I say something so cruel just to make her hurt as much as I did? Was I just getting even for what she said to me?

I'm not hard pressed to find the exact reason as to why I have such difficulty with relationships. Erudite is the perfect faction to grow up in if you're studious, and focused on knowledge, which I wasn't. I was a boy with the undying curiosity of a true Erudite, but the unbridled passion and adventure seeking of a Dauntless. I couldn't find myself in Erudite; I constantly felt like I was boxed in, expected to live a life of great knowledge instead of the adventure I craved and perhaps that stunted my emotional growth. My parents were extremely strict, and it was expected that my brother and I would straddle the line of satisfying our curiosities without being illogical or taking away from our education. My parents loved us, and each other, but it was in the clinical and logical way an Erudite shows their affections. Don't get me wrong, my childhood was great compared to some, but I think the way I was raised definitely helped develop my detachment towards anything resembling a relationship. Love wasn't _experienced_ there, it was _taught_ and it was something that was methodically planned out and logical. There was no falling in love, no relationship build up, it was almost as if you were studied and compared to your peers, then matched up with your most logical and compatible suitor. Then, just like that, love. Then marriage. Then kids, at least two, preferable a boy and a girl.

When I left Erudite it was truly because I didn't belong there. To say my family was shocked would be quite the understatement. I will never forget the look on my mother's face when I walked away from that stage after letting my blood drip on the sizzling coals of Dauntless. Leaving my family proved to be a lot harder than I thought it would be, but I found Dauntless' free thinking and overt sexuality was a great way to distract myself from the life I left behind. I decided to become Dauntless, I drank, I got tattoos and piercings and I had sex. There were a lot of women in Dauntless who had the same detached attitude towards sex that I did, so I fell into a routine of getting drunk, hooking up and moving on. My physical needs were met, that's all I felt like I needed. I didn't want to be in love, and these women were just a body for me to find my physical release. Logical, right? An actual body, who would sometimes reciprocate my pleasure, made much more sense than the constant use of my hand.

After initiation I started to feel like a true Dauntless and I moved seamlessly into leadership. Leadership was bullshit and I quickly learned that being a young Dauntless leader meant that you turned a blind eye to the corruption that was rampant, and you followed orders quietly. But Max, dammit Max was different. I don't know why he followed Jeanine and her bullshit so blindly. The man had a conscious, and a soul. He was a quiet strategist, and if you didn't know better you would have thought he belonged in Erudite more than some who were born in the faction. He wasn't the type of man who'd follow someone else's plan, he was a born leader and could have easily ran all five factions single handedly. He had a soft spot for his younger leaders, and especially for Four and myself.

I think Max was disappointed that I didn't do a better job in following Jeanine's orders, but at the same time I also think he tried to protect me as much as possible. When we were rescuing Tris and he pulled that gun on her I panicked. I had looked up to Max, he mentored me, he protected me, he pushed me to my limits to make me better but in that exact moment he forced me to make a choice. I looked at Max like a father, but he was flawed and his choice to blindly follow Jeanine in pursuit of power made my choice at the time to do whatever was necessary to save Tris very easy. If I'm being honest with myself I'll admit that I've struggled with that decision almost daily since then.

People assume that I'm this cold and unfeeling soldier, a killing machine without a conscious. They couldn't be more wrong. When I shot Jeanine it was purely for revenge. She'd taken the only people I'd ever loved away from me, and it was just for her to prove how much power she held over me. I don't regret that she's dead, she deserved to die for everything that she did, but I do sometimes have a nagging regret of killing her the way I did. On the other hand killing Max still haunts me to this day, but I've justified my actions over and over because I felt like I did what was necessary to save someone I love. When Tris told me she'd become factionless with Four it was almost like she'd physically ripped my heart from my chest. I'm angry, mad because she's willing to throw what we have away for _him_ , but even more upset that I'd sacrificed everything to be with her and she doesn't see it. I _killed_ for _her._ I could have just incompacitated Max, but subconsciously I knew in a split second if I left him alive he'd never stop coming for her. He's dead, and even though I know it's not her fault that he chose the path he did, I still fight my own demons when it comes to his death.

Doing the right things were easier than figuring out what was going on in my head when it came to Tris. The girl who was covered in her shapeless grey dress and sweater caught my attention when she stepped forward and jumped first. It was definitely a physical attraction to begin with, that's pretty much all I was capable of when I met her. She wasn't a one night stand type of woman, and I wasn't a one woman type of man so it was easy to let Four get the girl. Not that there was even a chance for me, girls like that didn't go for guys like me. I watched her though, and every so often I'd catch her watching me as well. I was intrigued by the former prim and proper Abnegation girl who was quickly becoming a formidable Dauntless woman. The more I'd find myself thinking of her, the more I'd go out and pursue some meaningless fucking.

In my more sober hookups, I'd always think of her while I was buried in someone else. Fuck, I'd think of her pretty much all the time, whether it be while I was fucking someone, getting sucked off or taking care of business myself. Maybe I should have felt bad for that, but I didn't. On more than one occasion I'd called out her name during sex, which would mostly be unnoticed by whoever I was fucking at the time. The types of women I was screwing were always just as much detached from the act as I was. Hell, I'd been called other men's names several times myself, it didn't stop me from cumming. So what if I fantasized about the Stiff, I mean she was hot, and it got me off even more knowing I was thinking of fucking Four's girlfriend.

Four, what a fucking prick. He and I had this competitive friendship going on during initiation. When Dalia was killed he blamed me, which was understandable since I blamed myself more than anything. I didn't care that he and I weren't friends anymore, it was easier that way anyway. I had a goal in mind and he ruined that too, coming in first place after smoking me in the fear sims with his stupid low number of fears. How this Abnegation kid swooped in and become the best Dauntless was beyond me, until I realized that divergents were special. For a minute I thought that maybe Jeanine's paranoia wasn't too far fetched, except when I realized she was a fucking delusional psychopath who wanted the divergents destroyed and I merely wanted to know how they worked. My jealousy issues certainly started with Four, without a doubt. First because of the way he and Dalia looked at each other, then with how good he was in our initiation class, then when he was offered leadership before me, and finally when he landed the girl I actually wanted.

It took me awhile but I found a way to start talking to Tris on a more personal level once she started working in the tattoo shop. I was really disappointed when she turned down leadership, but rumor was she didn't want to work with me. I had a pretty good feeling that her paranoid and poisonous boyfriend made her come to that decision because anyone with two eyes could see that the girl was a born leader.

One night, after my usual routine of getting drunk enough to find a hookup, I was in the process of following some random back to her place when I saw Tris sitting in the tattoo shop reading a book by herself. I grabbed the bottle of whiskey from the girl who was hanging on me, pushed her aside and went into the tattoo shop and demanded a tattoo. Tris was hesitant since she could tell I was pretty inebriated, but she relented when I pulled the leader card and she even decided to drink with me as she worked on my tattoo. It was the first personal conversation we'd ever had, and I found reasons to prolong the evening by getting more detail on my tattoo. I can honestly say that I ended up with most of my ink just because I wanted a reason to be close to her. We weren't what I'd call friends, at least not out in public, but I liked the time we spent alone much more than I was prepared to admit. I knew I was opening up to her, and I hated that she was able to get so much out of me without any hesitance on my part. She made me lose my inhibitions, and as much as I'd like to blame that on the alcohol it wasn't that at all, it was all her. There was something about Tris that made me feel like I was emotionally stripped naked when I was around her. She stimulated my mind, and not just my dick, and we were intimate without ever being physical. After an evening of her tattooing me and having intellectual conversation I'd go home with a fucking hard on from the way her _mind_ worked as much as the way her body moved. I'd never been turned on by a conversation before, hell some of the randoms I'd fucked would have to blow me until their jaws cramped just for me to even get a semi, and here was this woman who turned me on beyond belief with just her intelligence.

This woman was different. Sure, she was hot, with a tight body and this untouchable aura about her, but she was so very different. The randoms I hooked up with never could arouse me without touching me in some way. The randoms weren't classicly beautiful like Tris, they usually had overused bodies, sometimes filled with some sort of silicone enhancement, caked on makeup and layers of cheap perfume. Could I have had a better selection of women that I chose to follow home? Of course, but why bother? Deep down inside there was only one woman I actually wanted, someone who took the time to try to know me, and someone who had absolutely no interest in fucking a leader just for bragging rights. Until I could have her, the plastic randoms would do.

I have no idea how or when I fell in love with Tris, but I know without a shadow of a doubt that I am very much in love with her, no matter what bullshit comes out of my mouth when I'm angry. I can blame my fucked up personality on my Erudite upbringing to an extent, but the bottom line is that there is a part of me that enjoys causing pain to someone else. I'm not sadistic, but when I've been hurt by someone all I can do is focus on how to hurt that person more. The line between love and hate gets entirely too blurred even for my own comfort level, and by the time I'm capable of feeling remorse it's usually too late to repair the damage I've caused. So while I can freely admit that I'm angry and hurt at her threat to leave me because of Four, I think it's deeper than that. I'm pissed that I sacrificed so much to be with her and she's willing to throw it all away. I'm angry that the woman I've been preparing myself for, on a mostly subconscious level, is the one to break me. I'm pissed that she promised to be my family and she's walking away from it.

Or wait, maybe it's _me_ that's pushing her away from it. Fuck.

There is another knock on my door, which at least distracts me from thoughts of Tris, even if I know it's Peter.

"Peter go away!" I yell out.

"It's not Peter." I hear Tori's voice from the other side of the door. Shit.

"Hold on." I call out. I quickly get dressed in the clothes I left laying on the floor. Once I'm decent, I open the door and invite her in, gesturing for her to have a seat on the extra bed.

"Can we talk?" She asks. "Not as leader to leader though."

This seems like a loaded question. "Um, sure." I reply.

"You and I aren't really friends, not in the standard and expected way a friendship is to work." She states matter-of-factly. She doesn't say anything else, she seems to be waiting for a response from me.

"Was that a question?" I ask and she smiles slightly.

"More like a statement I suppose. Ok, let me try again. Before you ask, I'm here on my own, and not because anyone sent me to do their bidding. I'm actually taking time away from my husband, who I've barely seen in weeks, just to come in here and talk to you. Please keep that in mind." She says.

"Ok..." I reply, still unsure of where this is going.

"I think you're a fucking idiot." She declares. "Actually, if there is something worse than an idiot, that's you right now."

"You weren't kidding about the not being friends thing, huh?" I reply.

"Don't be a smart ass right now. I was serious about taking time away from my husband to come in here and talk to you, I need you to understand how big of a deal that is, so don't waste my time with your snarky comments. I don't do gossip, nor do I usually take any time worrying about other people's bullshit problems. You and I are not friends per se, but I care about you and Tris, and right now someone needs to be brutally honest with both of you. I'm starting with you, because she's already got three people with her talking her down from what you did earlier." Tori replies.

"Look, it's not just me." I reply and she holds her hand up.

"Shut up. I never said it was only you. Now are you going to listen or not?" She admonishes and I nod. This version of Tori is intimidating. "Good. I understand this is unsolicited advice, but like I said you need to hear some things. You _should_ be pissed at her for being stupid. Honestly, she's done one idiotic thing after another since the two of you started your relationship. Here's the thing though, you love her anyway. That's what a commitment is all about."

"How can you be so flippant about it? She threatened to leave me, and our home for her ex." I interject.

"Have you ever said anything out of anger in the heat of the moment Eric? Wait, let me answer my own question, yes you have! You, loudly I may add, told her you didn't love her just a few hours ago. So, according to my scorecard you're pretty even." She retorts.

"It's not a matter of getting even." I reply and Tori narrows her eyes at me.

"So you really don't love her? You'd be perfectly fine with her moving on with her life? Never mind, don't answer that yet. I'm going to share something with you, and maybe then you'll understand where I'm coming from. Do you know how Bud and I got together?" She asks.

I search my memory for an answer. Tori and Bud were married long before I transferred to Dauntless, and for all intents and purposes they seem to be a well matched and extremely happy couple. I've never actually heard anything about their pre-marriage days.

"No, I don't." I reply.

"Bud and I started very much like Tris and you did. We were two people who outwardly seemed like complete opposites, we bickered because our personalities were too similar, we actually didn't like each other very much. My brother actually _hated_ Bud for the longest time, because in all honesty Bud was, and still can be an arrogant prick. I was with my ex Dale for almost two years, you know him right?"

I nod. "Yeah, he's head of faction security in the control room."

"Yes. So he and I were together, and maybe it wasn't the same status of the two Abnegation transfers getting together like Tris and Four, but for awhile there we were the couple to be. Bud and I coexisted at best. He worked in the tattoo shop even then, so any ink I'd get done was usually by him, and while we'd have some decent conversations while working together we weren't friends out in public at all. Anyway, Dale and I broke up, caught him screwing another girl in our bed. Bud started showing interest in me, but I was pretty blind to it because all I could think about was what was so wrong with me that would cause what Dale to do what he did. Bud and I did get closer, but he wasn't boyfriend material. He had a pretty bad reputation, he was the biggest manwhore in Dauntless before you came along and gave him a run for his money, so while he may have been growing on me I couldn't get that out of my mind. So one day there's a huge factionless riot, and Bud decides to volunteer to join the fight. Everyone in Dauntless is trained to be a soldier, but even you have to admit that you lose your touch if you're not constantly honing your craft. I was so pissed that he volunteered, because it wasn't even necessary for him to go. Finally, he relented and told me he wouldn't go, and just like that it was done. Everything was normal the rest of our shift, except when he didn't come back from his dinner break that night. I found out he'd left the compound with the last group of soldiers, but I was told he shouldn't be gone more than one night. All of his group returned the next day Eric, except for Bud. One night turned into several, and before I knew it he'd been gone for two weeks and leadership was in the process of declaring him dead because the search parties couldn't find him. I was heartbroken, even though it was my own fault that I'd kept Bud at arms length the only thing I could think of every damn night was that he'd died never knowing that I loved him."

"What happened to him?" I ask hesitantly. I know Bud is alive and well, but I'm almost afraid to hear the rest of Tori's story.

"He was injured in the riot, and he'd been taken to Erudite for treatment. Apparently, Jeanine Matthews had already started her divergent testing, even that far back, and she somehow caught on that Bud was divergent. She allowed him to recover from his injuries, then spent several days experimenting on him. I didn't want to give up on Bud, because I felt like the only way I'd truly believe he was dead is if we'd retrieve his body. I gathered my own search party, which was basically myself, my brother, Amar and Dale of all people and we finally tracked him to Erudite. My mother was a leader of Erudite, and she thankfully _didn't_ believe in Jeanine's plans for the divergent, so she was instrumental in getting Bud away from Jeanine and back to us. Once we had him home, he went through a lot of what Tris did with the confusion, memory issues and nightmares. But, the minute that he started to come off of everything that Jeanine had dosed him with I finally told him I loved him, and that I had for awhile. He dragged me into Max's office and married me on the spot. We hadn't so much as held hands before that day, and we married each other without hesitation because we _knew_ that what we had was real, and that it could be taken away at any given time."

I'm taken aback by what she's shared. Tori was right, she and I aren't friends, and that stemmed from her belief that I had participated in the death of her brother and his then boyfriend. While she and I certainly have different opinions of each other now, we still aren't the closest people in Dauntless.

"Why are you telling me this?" I cautiously ask.

"Because when I look at Tris and you, I see Bud and me. We denied our feelings for each other for a long time. I thought I'd be happy with Dale, everyone believed he was the perfect man. I looked at Bud and saw him as someone who wasn't capable of love or commitment, and was only trying to be with me to add a notch to his bedpost. He and I fought like crazy before he left, and then he lied to me and left anyway. None of that mattered anymore, not once I had him back. I wasn't going to let him go ever again. Our marriage isn't conventional, and we still fight dirty on occasion, but I love him more today than I ever thought was possible. I have no regrets." She replies.

"You think I'm making a mistake with Tris." I state.

"Of course I do. Have you even given her a chance to properly apologize?" She asks.

"Not really." I reply.

"Eric, do you love her?"

"Yeah." I admit.

"Does it feel any better to have broken up with her over what she said to you?" She asks.

"It's not just what she said Tori, it's what she did too. You were perfectly ok with Bud lying to you and leaving you like that?" I ask.

"Fuck no I wasn't! I was livid! But Eric, it didn't matter once I had him back in front of me. He knows he made a mistake that night, and I forgave him for it a long time ago. I saw you fall apart when they told you she was dead. I remember that feeling all too well myself. Eric, she's right here in front of you now. Are you truly willing to let her go? Because if so you'll have to be ok with her moving on one day, getting another boyfriend, getting married, having kids. All of that, with someone else. Is that what you want?" She asks.

"No, I don't want to even think of someone else touching her, much less her getting married and having someone else's kids. That's our endgame, not anyone else's." I reply angrily.

Tori just stares at me, and after several minutes I'm annoyed by it. "What?!" I yell.

"Do you realize what you just admitted to?" She asks.

"What, that I love her? That shouldn't come as a shock, as you already pointed out you know I was full of shit when I told her I didn't." I reply.

"Endgame." She replies simply.

"Fuck." I reply. "Did you slip me truth serum?" I ask her with a smirk.

"As much fun as that would be, sadly I don't have access to the fun stuff here. Eric, you can get as angry as you want, because like I said earlier in our conversation she deserves it for her own foolishness. You just admitted, without the help of any truth serum, that she is your endgame." She replies.

"There's no one else. None of the women I've been with will ever be what she is to me." I reply honestly.

"You sound exactly like my husband, sixteen years ago on the night of our wedding."

"I told her I didn't love her. How do we recover from that?" I ask.

"First, you both need to be calm and rational. I think it's safe to admit that both of you said things with the sole purpose of wounding each other. Once you're no longer angry at her, you talk to her. You grow a set, apologize like mad, and make it right." She replies.

"You do realize I don't know what the hell I'm doing when it comes to emotions right?"

"Yes, I do realize that. That's why you don't overthink things or practice some big elaborate apology speech. You speak from your heart, let everything out, and trust me she will listen." Tori replies.

"How do you know? Has she told you that?" I ask.

"No. I haven't talked to her at all since your last fight in the hallway. I know because she loves you." She replies.

"I don't know that I'm good at the forgiveness thing myself Tori. I'm still upset about what she did."

"Eric, I'm going to be very blunt with you right now. Remember, we're not talking as leaders right now, ok?" She says and I nod. "Do you want a future with her?"

"What exactly are you asking me here?"

"Jesus, you are difficult. Are you willing to let your anger at her actions allow you to lose her permanently?" She asks.

"No." I reply.

"I get that you're pissed, but if you continue to be a dick to her because in your mind you feel like she needs to be punished for a certain amount of time before you can take her back you _will_ lose her." Tori replies. "Eric, talk to her at least. Let her know that even though you're still angry or upset with her it doesn't mean you want to end your relationship. If you do want a future with her, she needs to know it. Do you know how hard it is to worry that each argument, no matter how big or small, could be the end of your relationship because you're not sure the other person is as committed to it as you are?"

"I actually do know that feeling." I reply. "Quite well."

"You need to talk to her Eric." Tori says firmly. "I'm not saying that you need to do anything drastic, all I'm saying is that she should at least know that you love her and that the relationship you have with her is important, even when the two of you are fighting."

"Yeah, I know."

"She's up on the roof. Her friends were with her, but I'm sure they'd be easy to pursuade to leave since they were all drinking when I left them." She replies.

"Maybe."

"What the hell are you waiting for?" Tori asks with exasperation in her voice.

"I don't know. Ok, I'm leaving. Thank you Tori. I needed this." I reply as we both stand to walk out. Tori gives me a brief hug before turning towards the door.

"You're welcome. You can come to talk any time, to me or to Bud. He's who talked me into coming to talk to you."

"I appreciate that, please thank him for me." I reply as she nods.

"You may only get this one last chance to make it right. Don't screw it up." She says before leaving the room. I walk out behind her, closing the door and watching her as she strolls back to the room she's sharing with her husband.

I head to the roof with a nervousness that I'm not used to feeling, but I finally know what I need to do to make things right between Tris and me. I just hope it's not too late.


	21. Chapter 21

Tris POV

There was a time where I'd prided myself on my ability to completely hold my feelings inside. Being raised in Abnegation, it was selfish to speak your mind without consideration of another's feelings. You would have to police every word, every action, every facial movement and always body language. Women were the meeker sex, raised in the shadows of our revered fathers and brothers, knowing that if we were to choose to remain in Abnegation we would live a life of servitude to our community, the factionless and most importantly our husbands. I decided at a young age that one day I wouldn't be silenced anymore.

Most dependents choose to remain in Abnegation, mostly out of fear of the unknown. When they do transfer, it's always to Amity. The meek Abnegation children who yearn to have even a miniscule amount of freedom take to the peace and love of Amity. We never look any further than our own world of grey, or the expansive fields of Amity because everything else out there is something to be feared. The bubble was shattered when Tobias Eaton left his father's shadow, and his leather belt, and transferred to Dauntless. I remember my parents coming home and talking about it in hushed whispers, and those whispers made their way through our community like wildfire, everyone wondering why the only child of the most powerful man in Abnegation would not only leave his roots but defect to the warrior faction. Abnegation dependents aren't warriors, we aren't leaders, we are simply followers.

Some assumed I was yet another follower when I chose to leave Abnegation for Dauntless two years later. The rumor was I wanted to follow Tobias, little did they know that I barely knew the boy who cowered in the corners and avoided physical and emotional contact more so than our upbringing even demanded. The day he pulled me out of the net I had no idea who he was. He wasn't the first Dauntless man who caught my eye, even though everyone who knew me assumed that he was. Instead, it was the tall, muscular, pierced and tattooed leader who welcomed us by forcing us to face the unknown that was waiting for us at the bottom of a dark hole.

He was rough, both in the way he spoke and the way he treated us. Day after day he pushed us. His sneers, yells and threats haunted my dreams at night, but his stolen looks and the few serene moments he allowed himself filled my days. Everyone who encountered him feared him, including myself, yet he still intrigued me. I would watch the way he interacted with people, the way his sheer size would make others shrink before him, the way he could slice you with his words and the way his penetrating gaze could weaken the bravest warrior. The dips and planes of his body, where every muscle was fine tuned and coiled called out to me, causing me to watch the way he moved and not always listen to the words he spoke. I was keenly aware of our instructor watching me, but I was watching our ruthless leader instead. Sometimes he would watch me too, and there was a small flame lit inside of me any time his silvery grey eyes would catch mine. Everyday I wanted to ask him if he felt the spark between us the way I did, and everyday his unapproachable demeanor forced me to keep my distance.

I remember the first time I was warned about Eric and it fell on deaf ears. The person who spoke the warning was our instructor, and it was no secret that Four and Eric hated each other. It wasn't until Four finally revealed himself to be Tobias Eaton that he earned my trust, and he was so sincere in his efforts to help and protect me from the evil he claimed lurked in Eric that it caused me to forget about how much I truly wanted the cold leader. Every day that I became closer to Tobias I moved further from Eric. I convinced myself it didn't matter, because even though I was attracted to the man he was nothing more than an enigma. He was brutal and ruthless and I believed every word that Tobias spoke when it came to the other man. Tobias was safe, he was a kind Abnegation man who made himself a Dauntless soldier. It wasn't until he and I had moved in together than I realized that we were so different. While Tobias was an Abnegation at heart, I wasn't. He forced himself to become Dauntless to escape the abuse of his father, and I spent eighteen years forcing myself to be Abnegation when I was Dauntless at heart. For every way that we were alike, there were ten more ways we were different. As quickly as my infatuation had grown for Tobias it began to fade away just as rapidly. He was keeping secrets and telling lies, but I was too.

The first time I gave Eric a tattoo he was intoxicated. Most of the time we would refuse to tattoo anyone who was under the influence because it was well known that alcohol would thin the blood, causing unnecessary bleeding while being tattooed. But, like everything else about Eric, he was different. For the first time since I'd met the mysterious leader some of his walls were down and we had an actual conversation. Soon Eric would only visit me for his tattoos, and each time we'd drink together. When it was just a bottle of whiskey, my tattoo gun and the two of us he was different; he'd allow me to peel away the layers of his complicated personality. Eric would never acknowledge our conversations outside of the tattoo parlor, making me realize that it wasn't that he didn't remember them but instead he was embarrassed that he'd opened up to someone. We never knew how badly each of us wanted the other, I was too wrapped up in trying to be one half of what everyone assumed was the perfect power couple while Eric watched from afar, trying to convince himself that drunken hookups and one night stands were better than being in love.

Even though my memories are still incomplete, I now know that Eric loved me through my farce of a relationship with Tobias. He loved me enough to save me even when it meant he had to kill people he once cared about. He loved me through memory serums, and through my struggle to remember that he was tender and kind with me and not the monster who appeared in my worst nightmares. He loved me when he wasn't sure that he could love himself. What did I do with his unconditional love? Pushed it to the side when I didn't get my way. I was no longer that meek Abnegation girl, I wasn't going to live in the shadow of anyone and I was going to be selfish and speak without thinking and without regard to what anyone else felt. As the words tore out of my lips I wanted to physically bring them back in. Everything inside of me screamed for me to stop, but I kept unloading, I let out eighteen years of Abnegation upbringing and seven months of a surpressing Abnegation type relationship and the target was the one man who loved me for the Dauntless woman I am.

His words of retaliation cut me like the knives he once ordered to be thrown at me as punishment for the first time I dared to speak out against him. I reacted to his words, just as anyone else would. I cried until I couldn't physically cry anymore. I listened to the kind words of Peter, Edgar and Christina as they soothed me and convinced me that Eric was just lashing out. I realized they were right, and just as I lashed out at Eric and fought with all of my anger and pain he did the same exact thing to me. He's just as damaged as I am, but our broken parts fit together and make us complete.

It took me hours to convince everyone that I was just out on the roof because it helps me clear my head, not because I'm going to pitch myself off of it, so I'm finally alone with my thoughts. As much as I love and appreciate my friends and my brother, I'm content with the unopened bottle of whiskey they left me after they helped me drink the first one. Although, to be honest it was more of Peter and Christina drinking the first bottle while Edgar and I got tiny sips whenever they'd remember to share. So now it's just me, the clear cold night, the beautiful stars and my bottle of whiskey.

I think back to our choosing day and how when Caleb let his blood drip over the Erudite bowl it caused a stir within the crowd. Hindsight is twenty twenty, so looking back I can see that Caleb was different our whole childhood. He was analytical, fickle and logical. He was unable to make a quick decision about anything, which infuriated me. I always thought that Caleb was the perfect Abnegation, but I've since learned he was a wolf in sheep's clothing. I mourn the person I _thought_ he was, and it's possible I always will. I feel like it's selfish that I'm mourning the loss of my relationship more than my own brother, and it's causing more inner turmoil, but it's hard for me to miss a brother who didn't actually exist.

I hear the sound of the rooftop door opening, and I brace myself for the drunken return of Christina. If by some miracle it's not her, I'm hidden enough from view that maybe whoever it is will leave me alone. I quickly realize I'm not going to be so lucky when the sound of boots on gravel starts getting closer to me. I continue leaning against the ledge and looking at the night sky when a warm jacket is dropped over my shoulders.

"How'd I know you'd be outside freezing without a coat?" Eric asks as he moves next to me.

"I am well known for my poor decisions." I reply before taking a sip from my whiskey bottle.

"I've been known to make a few myself." He retorts. "Drinking alone?"

"Chris, Edgar and Peter went back inside a little while ago. You're here now, and I'm willing to share." I reply as I hand him my bottle. He takes a long drink.

"Thanks." He says quietly.

There are several minutes of silence before I decide to speak. "I have no right to ask you to forgive me. I lashed out, without thinking, with the intent to hurt you in order to get my way. I just need you to know that I'm sorry for hurting you. I will never be able to forgive myself for treating our relationship like it didn't matter, and for hurting you. I won't bring it up anymore Eric, you've told me you don't want to talk about it and I'm finally going to start listening. I just wanted you to know how sorry I am." I don't look at Eric at all after I finish my apology. He's not reacting, and we stand together, not touching, and not talking. We pass the bottle back and forth a few times before Eric breaks the silence.

"I'm sorry too." He says so softly that I almost wonder if he didn't mean for me to hear it. He's quiet again for several minutes and when I open my mouth to speak he continues. "Please don't say anything yet. I'm horrible at this, with feelings and emotions and shit. I just need to talk, so it may be a bunch of words that don't make sense but I need to get it all out, ok? I was cruel. I lashed out, and telling you that I didn't want you or love you is my absolute biggest regret. There's nothing I can do to make you forget what I said, fuck I wish I could forget it. But I can promise you Tris, I will do everything in my power to make it up to you. I love you. I've loved you almost from when we met. I don't even know how I could say I didn't. I thought you were _dead._ I had no fucking idea how I was going to keep living without you here. You told me you'd be my family and you are Tris. You're everything to me. I was jealous. I thought that once you found out he was just as much a mind controlled drone as everyone else was during the war that you'd want him back. So when you threatened to leave I thought that was it - that you realized that I'm just a fucked up person and that you deserved better than me. So I just decided to end it before you could walk away from me. I was wrong. I can't be without you, do you understand that? I love you so much Tris, and I will spend the rest of my life making sure you know exactly how much I love you. I'm so sorry."

I say nothing. We are both emotional and on the verge of tears and he looks like if I even so much as breathed on him he'd break.

"Please say something." He pleads.

"I never wanted to leave you." I reply in a broken voice as the tears start to fall. "I'm so sorry that I said that I would. I should have never said that to you. I won't ever leave you again. I love you."

He cuts me off when he closes the space between us and crashes his lips to mine. It's exactly like our first time and we kiss like we've waited our whole lives for this. He fists his hands in my hair and I grasp at his shirt on his back.

Eric breaks our kiss and breathes heavily. "Please tell me you're not drunk right now."

I laugh and kiss him again. He wraps his arms around me and pulls me as close to him as he can.

"I'm not drunk at all." I breathe out when we break our kiss.

"Come to bed?" He asks. I nod and he grabs my hand and leads me back inside and to our room.

Once inside, we get undressed and slip into the bed. Eric's intense grey eyes are trained on me, and I gently run my fingers through his messy hair.

"I missed you." He says as he runs his hands up and down my back.

"I missed you." I whisper and he sighs.

"What did they do to you?" He asks quietly.

"Sims." I reply.

"Tris, please talk to me. We need it all out in the open. No matter what it is, we can talk about it and get through it."

"I frustrated them the first time they put me through what they called a baseline sim. I somehow managed to manipulate it into a rescue, and I was able to get out of that one when I realized your lip ring was gone. Tobias started helping me, he gave me tips on what to look for so that I could exit the sim, but he also gave me advice on how to make Caleb and Evelyn think that the serum was improving, but not perfect. He was trying to keep me alive. The sims got progressively worse, and it became harder for me to tell what was real and what was a sim, everything started to blur together. It started with a sim of you and me, you were trying to rescue me but instead somehow you snapped and tried to kill me. I let it happen, because I loved you too much to fight back. You looked so real Eric." I pause to collect my thoughts and Eric pulls me closer to him.

"You know I would never hurt you. I'd never put my hands on you in anything other than love." He whispers huskily against my ear.

"I know. Are you sure you want to hear the rest?" I ask and he nods. "That sim morphed into what I thought was Peter carrying me back to my cell. I was in bad shape, so everyone came together to try to help me. Then, another prisoner was brought in, and I finally saw it was you. I panicked, and started beating on my cell door until Tobias let me out. He put me in the cell with you, and at first you appeared to be unconscious. You woke up, had a blank look like you were mind controlled and you began strangling me. It felt so real. I couldn't make any noise, this time I was struggling and trying to fight back but I could feel myself dying. I couldn't get any air in, I vividly saw the black dots that obscured my vision and all I could think was the last thing I was going to see before I died were your blank, cold eyes. The next thing I knew you had been pulled off of me. Tobias came to me because I was having trouble breathing and we could hear a bad scuffle going on in the cell and then a gunshot. God, it was so loud, I could even _feel_ it in my ears. I couldn't hear at first because my ears were ringing so badly, but when my hearing started to come back Tobias kept telling me I didn't want to see it. I pushed him aside and you were on the ground." The tears start falling without warning. "You were bleeding and Peter was holding the gun shaking. No one was helping you..."

"It's ok baby, I'm right here. Shhhh." Eric whispers as he rubs my back with both hands, our chests pressed tightly together. "You don't have to continue."

"Yes, I do. I need to get all of this out now, you have to know what you're dealing with when it comes to me." I try to regain my composure before continuing. "No one was helping you. They all kept saying you were dead, you were gone. It was a chest wound. I opened your shirt and it was just awful, I saw the wound and it wasn't actively bleeding anymore, I knew you were gone. I was laying over you telling you goodbye. I thought they had finally broken me by killing the only man I'd ever loved. Then I saw it, your nipple piercings weren't there. I kept screaming until I woke up. That's the night that Tobias realized they wouldn't stop until they got what they wanted from me, even if it meant killing me. He finally got Peter to trust him, and Peter gave Will the order to reach out to you."

"That message terrified me." Eric whispers. "Will told me that you wouldn't make it much longer there, and knowing he's not one to panic or overreact I knew it was serious.

"I wouldn't have lasted another day there." I agree. "The last sim I was in had absolutely none of the tells that I'd been using to differentiate between reality and simulations. This one showed Caleb and Edgar hooking me up to this new IV way of distributing the serum. I was lying there, waiting for the sim to start and next thing I saw was Tobias coming to get me before they'd even put me under. He had altered the lab reports to concern Evelyn enough to stop testing on me immediately and order lab work. Under that guise, we escaped the building. We were told you all had been intercepted, so Tobias and I were joining the fight. We took out one soldier easily, and then he and I were ambushed. We finally got all of them down, but when I turned back to speak to him he was bleeding profusely from his neck. He died, in my arms. Edgar and Peter found me, and they sent for you. When you got there, you were so real. You finally talked me into letting them lift Tobias off of me. I told you I had forgiven him and you told me you did too because he saved my life. You and Edgar were carrying me to the hospital when I passed out. That was when my heart must have actually stopped during the sim. I woke up in the hospital with Edgar next to me, and it took me a long time to believe I wasn't still in a sim. When I saw you right before the trials, and you wrapped me up like this and sat down with me I knew it was finally real. Eric, tell me what happened to you."

"I woke up and you were just gone. I looked everywhere and finally saw the footage of you and Peter by the train. I was ready to say fuck everything and run in there with guns a blazing. It was Lynn of all people who stood up to me and put my emotional ass in its place. We made a plan, sent Will and Lynn in and were waiting for their intel before attacking. When I got the message from Will, I panicked and we started our attack. We fought our way in, and when I got to the cells I was told you had been taken back for more testing. Four showed up, and he told me..." He stops speaking, and I can tell he's trying to compose himself.

"I love you." He whispers.

"I love you too." I reply as I press a kiss on his jaw. He sighs and continues speaking.

"When Four said what he did, I didn't believe him. I made him take me to Evelyn and Caleb. Some of our soldiers had already captured them and they were in the lab guarding them. I put a gun to Caleb's head to make him talk but Evelyn wouldn't let him fucking tell me what had happened to you. So, I put the gun to Four's head and told her I was going to pull the trigger. She didn't believe me, but as soon as I turned and put my finger on the trigger she stopped me and started talking. She told me you had died in the name of science or some bullshit. I was going to kill her then and there Tris. Zeke had to talk me down, he told me I'd be executed. I didn't care though, I thought you were gone." Eric chokes the last words out.

"I'm so thankful for Zeke. If you had of killed her, I would have lost you forever." I say quietly.

I can feel the tension radiating off of him and I touch his face gently, trailing my fingers across his cheeks and around his jaw. I move to his hair, and run my fingers through his messy curls and drag my fingernails on his scalp. He sighs contentedly and I can feel his body start to relax again. I keep running my hands through his hair, down his neck and across his shoulders, repeating the process until I think he's asleep. He startles me when he starts talking.

"Everytime I think of what those bastards put you through it guts me. When I think of how close I was to losing you, it destroys me. Remember the first night we were in this room together, you told me I was so much more than I give myself credit for. You need to realize that about yourself. The Abnegation in you makes you willing to sacrifice everything you are for someone else. I need you to be selfish, Tris. I need you to love yourself the way that I love you. I'm selfish. I don't want to lose you." He says.

"I won't leave you again. I won't ever threaten you with that either. Please don't ever tell me that you're done with me or our relationship again. Please don't ever tell me you don't love me." I whisper.

"I won't. Tris, life is so precious and so short. Almost losing you has completely thrown me off my axis. Everything in my life up until recently was meticulously thought and planned out. I worked my ass off to become a member of Dauntless, then continued to work my ass off to become a leader. I didn't want, or need a relationship or love. I thought that as long as my physical needs were satisfied and I had the job of my dreams it'd be enough. I had my family's love, and I thought that was the only love I'd ever need. My feelings for you came out of nowhere. I was always drawn to you, and I thought the only reason I was so interested in you was my Erudite curiosity. Jeanine was obsessed with having you for testing, and it made me want to know why. I couldn't stand Four, or the way you let him take away your spirit, and it manifested into anger towards you. I didn't realize how much I appreciated our 'tattoo talks' as I would call them, and it scared the hell out of me when I would realize how much I'd revealed to you when I was drinking. When I said that I loved you under the truth serum, it was just as much of a shock to me as it was to you. But now, I don't want to waste any time, because I've seen how in an instant everything can change. I don't want to scare you."

"You're not scaring me at all. Our paths to each other may have been completely different, but what matters is where we are right now. I think I loved you well before I admitted it, or even knew it. The first time I was in Erudite, you always showed up in my sims. My memories were so scrambled, and I couldn't figure out why I'd always see you in my sims, and even dream about you but not know who you were." I reply.

"Tris, I don't think you understand how much I need you. I know I can be overwhelming, and clingy. I get jealous easily, and I react and speak before thinking. I'm not an easy person to love, and I'm sorry for that. I want to be a better man for you. I want to be worthy of you." He replies.

Eric has opened up to me more and more since we've been together, but this is the first time I've seen him completely expose his feelings. He's usually unable to show or admit to any vulnerability or weakness, and tonight he's laying everything out.

"You never have to worry about being worthy of me. I'm yours, in every way. I'm not perfect Eric, and neither are you, but the two of us together is perfect." I reply.

"You are my everything." He replies in a soft voice.

"You're mine. I really almost died." My voice breaks at saying those words out loud. "I was so wrapped up in getting here to you that I didn't even think about it or acknowledge it."

"You did. Tris, I can't lose you. If you die, I die." He whispers as he leans his forehead against mine. "I don't ever want to lose you Tris. I need you with me always. You are mine, and I'm yours. Do you understand that?" He breathes.

"I do." I whisper.

Eric pulls me towards him and kisses my neck, nipping and sucking on my pulsepoint. He pushes me slightly so I'm laying on my back and he moves so he's hovering over me. His pupils are blown wide with lust and when he presses his body closer to mine he lets out a low feral growl. He crashes his lips to mine, quickly thrusting his tongue into my mouth and mating it with mine. He pushes his finger inside of my folds, rubbing circles while kissing me passionately. Too soon, he removes his hand from between my thighs, adjusts himself and roughly thrusts into me and begins quickly pounding his hips against me without giving me time to adjust.

"You are _mine_ Tris." He whispers against my ear. He feels so good inside of me that I'm not even able to make any coherent words come out of my mouth. "Tell me baby, who do I belong to?"

"Me...you're mine Eric..." I moan as he picks up his relentless pace. He bends over and bites my lower lip, taking advantage of my open mouth to suck on my tongue before moving down to mark my neck.

"Do you know how much I love you?" He whispers breathily as he brings me to an earth shattering orgasm. "God baby, you feel so fucking good when you cum." He moans in my ear.

"Show me how much you love me." I whisper in between his hard and passionate kisses. His thrusts become erratic and I can tell he's close.

"You're mine." He says again before calling out my name as he spills inside of me. He falls onto me, trying to catch his breath as he shifts most of his weight onto his own forearms. "Never leave me again." He repeats breathily against my ear.

"Never again. I promise you." I reply.

He moves his head from my shoulder and leans his forehead against mine. "I need you with me, always. We will run this faction together, you will be right by my side forever, you will be the mother of my children. You are mine, and I am yours Tris. I need you in every way. Do you understand now?"

I don't respond with words, instead I kiss him hard and begin grinding against him. His semi-erect member is still buried inside of me, and the friction between us is causing him to harden again.

"I want to watch you fuck me." He growls as he moves away from me and lays on his back. I stroke him while kissing him, and once he's fully erect I straddle him and sink onto him slowly. We waste no time with teasing, quickly finding our rhythm as his hips meet me.

His hands are everywhere, moving from my breasts to my sides, to cupping and smacking my ass, to rubbing my clit. He has me on sensory overload and I can feel my want for him in every part of my body. I reach down and pull on his nipple piercings slightly, taking pleasure in the way he reacts to the small amount of pain. With each tug his back arches slightly, and he in turn pinches my nipples.

"I love you so much." I whisper as he watches me over him. He gently traces his fingers down my neck and around my breasts, his touches as light as a feather. He never moves his eyes from mine.

"I love you Tris. Only you. For the rest of our lives." He whispers to me, watching me as I continue to move over him. His muscles tense and contract with my every move, and his expression is a mixture of ecstasy and awe.

"Oh Eric..." I moan as I quicken my pace and feel a tightening in my lower belly.

"Cum for me baby." He whispers as he moves his hands to my hips and guides me up and down. His words are my undoing, and I cum calling his name as he quickly follows behind me. I move to his side and we immediately wrap up in each other's arms. I look at his face in the dark shadows of this room and I can see his silvery grey eyes intensely staring into mine. He closes his eyes and he finally appears to be relaxed.

"I'm sorry." He whispers, surprising me because I thought he had fallen asleep. "I just reacted without thinking. I shouldn't have said the things I did to you. I can't believe I told you I didn't love you. Tris, I hope you can forgive me for that. I love you more than anything."

"I know you didn't mean it. It was awful to hear, but once I was able to actually think rationally I knew you were just lashing out. We both said things that were specifically to hurt each other. We both fought dirty." I reply.

"Would you have really left?" He asks.

"Were you really done with our relationship?" I retort.

"That doesn't answer my question." He says in a calm, but firm voice.

"No. You are my family." I whisper. He leans forward and presses his lips against mine tenderly.

"It should be obvious that I'm not done with our relationship. I was pissed, and I acted out, just like you did. We both need to think before speaking. We both made empty threats, we both said some extremely ugly and painful things to each other. A time may come where one of us finally gets tired of forgiving the other." Eric says thoughtfully.

"You're right." I reply and I can feel a chuckle rumbling through him.

"What's so funny?" I ask.

"Every time that you admit that I'm right it's a small victory. I'm filing it away for future disagreements." He replies and I playfully smack his ass.

"You are such a jerk."

"I'm your jerk." He replies and I giggle.

"I'll do whatever you want and be whatever you need me to be. I love you Eric." I reply as I rub my hands down his back.

"I need you to be mine, forever. Tris, I want you to marry me."


	22. Chapter 22

Tris POV

I sit up slightly and look at Eric, watching his face for any sign of what the hell is going through his mind right now. For a few minutes I'm seriously considering getting out of bed and running as far from this room as I can.

"You want to marry me?" I ask.

"Yes, I want to marry you. I know this can be construed as me sending you mixed signals. Ok, if I'm being completely honest I can admit that I've definitely sent you mixed signals over the past twenty four hours. I can't apologize enough for what I've said to you to hurt you. I told you I'd spend the rest of our lives showing you how much I love you and I mean that. I don't want to waste any more time not being fully committed to starting our life together Tris." He replies.

"Eric, what brought this on?"

"We love each other. We've been through a war and an attempt to overthrow the government, stopped both but almost died in the process. We're looking at months or maybe longer of rebuilding the factions and getting all of the war criminals out and on trial. If we keep waiting for the right moment to make this permanent we'll just keep putting it off. You are it for me and I've almost lost you too many times to take that chance again. Give me a reason why we shouldn't get married Tris." He answers.

"You don't have to marry me to prove how committed you are to us. Eric, when we first started this you were terrified of being in a relationship. I'm not going anywhere, we have time for you to be comfortable with our relationship. I don't question your commitment to me, do you question mine to you?"

"You're not listening to me. I am not trying to prove anything, I'm not questioning anything and I'm not uncomfortable with our relationship. I want to be your husband. I want you to be my wife. I want us to eventually have a family some day. I want everything we are now and I want it forever. If you need me to get a ring first and get down on one knee I will. I'm not going to change my mind about our future Tris, so if we need to wait for you to be ready then so be it. I would marry you right this very minute if you'd let me." He replies. "Look, you don't have to answer me today. You don't even have to be ready yourself, I'll be here when you are. I need you to know I am committed to you and to us, and that you are my endgame. I don't want you to think that every time we argue or fight that it's over. You are it for me and I want to marry you."

"Eric, I..." I stop talking. I have absolutely no idea what to say to him. Several hours ago he told me he didn't want me and he didn't love me, but now he wants to get married?

"Tris, it's ok. You really don't have to answer me today ok? I just want you to know that's where my mind is, and that's where this is headed for me. We're going to disagree, we're going to fight and I'm pretty sure that no matter how hard we try we're going to say shit we don't mean. So, anytime that happens I need you to remember that I'm here for life." He replies.

This isn't how Eric works. We fight, we have awesome makeup sex, we apologize. That's it. I must have missed the step where Eric pours out his heart. No wait, that doesn't happen.

This isn't real.

"I need to get some air." I start crawling out of bed. I feel like the walls of this room are closing in on me. It's like Tobias' fear landscape all over again.

"Wait, no, don't leave." He grabs my arm and I yank out of his grasp.

"You don't get to do this." I reply as I throw my clothes on as quickly as possible. "You don't get to say horrible shit to me over the course of the last day and a half and then come here and tell me you want to marry me."

"Tris, what are you so pissed about? I fucked up with the way I acted, we both did, and now that I'm being open and honest with you it's an issue?" He asks.

"We had a pretty nasty fight, we both said a lot of bad stuff to each other. An apology would suffice Eric, I don't need a marriage proposal. I don't know why I am even trying to justify this with you right now. None of this is real."

"Do you think I'm telling you I want a future with you as my way of apologizing Tris?" He asks.

"This isn't real. I need air. I can't talk about this here. I feel like I'm suffocating." I reply as I shove my feet into my boots.

"Can I come with you?" He asks.

"No." I answer as I walk out the door. I need to get away from this building, if I could run all the way back to Dauntless I'd do it right now. I run through the halls of Candor, mostly empty at the late hour, but still alive.

Candor being the hub of all justice is truly the faction that never sleeps. There are trials and other legal proceedings and matters twenty four hours a day. Jack Kang once told me in all seriousness that lady justice is an insomiac, since crime doesn't always happen between the hours of nine and five.

I run until I get to the roof, where I throw open the door and take a deep gulp of the cold night air, releasing it through my mouth in a giant puff.

...in though your nose...

...out through your mouth...

I keep repeating those instructions in my head, desperately trying to get as much oxygen as possible in my constricted lungs.

"Tris, what the fuck?" Eric asks as he stomps over to me. His tread is normally so light. Is he angry? "Oh shit." He mutters. "Baby, just breathe. It's ok." I can feel him putting his jacket on me. Why do I never wear my own jacket? That's got to be a sign that I'm not responsible enough to be someone's wife. "You're scaring me, just take deep breaths in through your nose, then exhale through your mouth. That's it."

Interesting. I'm in the middle of freaking the absolute fuck out because the man who I love just proposed to me and somehow he's not pissed at me. He's holding me, wrapping his strong arms around me and easing me to the ground. Oh, I'm sitting in between his legs now, I like this, this is one of my favorite ways to sit with Eric. My back is against his strong chest, his thick arms are wrapped tightly around me and his breath is warm against my neck as he whispers reassurances in my ear. I feel safe.

"This isn't real. It can't be." I whisper.

"Yeah, this is real. We're real. Come back to me Tris." He whispers. I like the way his voice sounds. It's a deep rumble, but it's as smooth as velvet and it drips with seduction even when he doesn't mean for it to.

"No, this isn't real. None of it. We're still fighting. You don't love me. None of this is real." I say, feeling the burn of unshed tears in my eyes.

"I love you. Do you hear me Tris? I absolutely love you. This is real." He says. "Focus on me, just breathe for me. What can I do?"

"Talk to me about something only we'd know." I reply.

"Do you remember the first tattoo you gave me?" He asks.

"Yes. The willow tree on your rib cage." I whisper.

"Right. I came into your shop all belligerent drunk and demanded you tattoo me because I was your leader." He recalls.

"How could I forget? You were such an asshole." I mutter and I can feel him chuckle behind me.

"That is true. So, the tattoo was only going to be the tree, but I wanted to see you after that night. So we turned it into what it is now, how many sessions did it end up taking?" He asks.

"Six I think, plus you ended up with the others." I reply.

"Mhmm. Do you remember the last tattoo?" He asks. "I think you finished it finally what about three days before the war started?"

"Yeah, the coverup you had me finish on your shoulder. You had me cover the Erudite symbol."

"Yes. We talked about love that night. Do you remember?" He asks.

"You asked me if I'd ever been in love, and I'd told you I didn't know what love even was." I reply quietly.

"You asked me the same thing, do you remember what my answer was?"

"I'll never forget what you said that night. You told me that your thoughts on the concept were complicated. You summarized being in love as being attracted to someone's mind, their heart and their actual being. You told me that anyone could have a physical connection, those were simple, but if you connected with someone's mind and soul it was love."

"Everything I said that night was about you. I just hadn't quite realized that I was in love with you yet." He replies softly. "You're starting to remember how we started."

 ** _Flashback_**

 _"Why did they bring me here? I thought he cared about_ _me." I cry into the warm shoulder of the man who's holding me._

 _"He wasn't who you thought he was Tris. I should have stayed with you." He replies._

 _"Why can't I remember everything Eric?" I ask._

 _"I don't know. I got here as soon as I found out you'd been captured. I don't know what they've given you."_

 _"What are we to each other?" I ask. I feel his soft lips pressed against my forehead._

 _"More than we've ever admitted to." He whispers._

 _"My mind doesn't quite remember everything about you or about us. I want to, but every time I try to think about who we were to each other I draw a blank. My heart hasn't forgotten you though."_

 _He leans back slightly from me so he can look down at me. "What do you mean Tris?"_

 _"I think at some point I may have loved you, and you may have loved me too. Is that possible Eric?" I ask. His silvery grey eyes don't leave mine. There's such a familiarity between us and I know that even though my memories are so scrambled thoughts of him keep drifting into my subconscious mind._

 _"It's possible Tris. I need you to fight whatever else they give you, ok? I need you to remember me because when we get out of here things are going to be different for us. You and me, we're going to start a new life." He says in his deep voice._

 _"I won't let them steal anymore of my memories." I reply. "Tell me about our new life."_

 _He takes a deep breath and rests his chin on top of my head again before speaking. "It's going to be a life that neither of us ever had before. It's going to be you and me, we're going to get to know each other. I'm going to take you on a date, well lots of dates. I think the first place we should go should be outside at night so we can look at the stars. You've told me before how much you like doing that, and..."_

 _"Eric, clear out now. She's back from Abnegation and she's coming straight here for Tris." We hear someone announce through the meal slot in my door. Eric jumps up from my bed and heads to the door._

 _"Don't forget me Tris." He says._

 _"Never." I reply as he quickly leaves my cell._

 _ **End Flashback**_

"We were so close to admitting it in Erudite." I reply.

"What do you mean?" He asks. I don't immediately respond and I feel his hand on my chin and he turns my head so he can see me. "Tris?"

"I think it might have been the day I was brought there." I whisper. Eric adjusts his body so we can look at each other.

"You remember something?" He asks.

"We were lying together on my bed in my cell. I was trying to remember what we were to each other, but my head was so messed up." I say slowly. "I told you my heart hadn't forgotten you, even if my mind wasn't quite right."

"That happened." He answers.

"You asked me to not forget you." I add and he nods once. "You told me when everything was done we were going to start a new life."

Eric exhales, a cloud of smoke rushing through the cold air. He brings his lips down to mine and kisses me tenderly before speaking again.

"I promised you a date." He replies.

"Outside, at night so we could see the stars." I finish. He smiles at me, one of those rare genuine smiles that he only shares with me.

"That was the first night you were held in Erudite. Jeanine hadn't even seen you yet, she was still in Abnegation. It was before the dose of memory serum that Marcus gave you had fully overtaken you." Eric replies.

"My heart never forgot you." I say.

"I've waited a long time to hear you say that. I love you Tris." He replies.

"I love you too. This is real. We are real." I lean forward and capture his lips with mine.

We hear the sound of the roof door being thrown open and heavy, uncoordinated footsteps heading towards us. I look up and see Peter.

"You two were making out." Peter says with a goofy smile.

"We were talking." I answer. "You're drunk."

"Oh good. You're talking, that's great right? This means you're getting back together, right? It's much easier when you two are together, seriously. It makes Eric a lot easier to get along with, no offense man." Peter slurs.

"None taken." Eric chuckles.

"Hey, I'm not drunk. I'm here to talk sense into him. Eric, she's the girl for you. Come on man, just admit it. Besides, Tris is hot. Like girl next door meets sexy little doe eyed virgin. Oh man, was she a virgin your first time?" He asks as he takes a long swig from his bottle. He then hands it to Eric.

"You realize I'm right here, right Peter?" I ask.

"Yup. I'll share you too. I mean, not share you, oh shit not like that at all. I mean I'll share my whiskey with you. You should drink with us. We could all use a drink, shit got real you know what I'm saying? You died. Like heart stopped beating died. I thought he was gonna kill me when he saw me." Peter rambles. Eric passes the bottle to me and I take a long drink.

"What happened to Christina and Edgar?" I ask.

"Christina is passed the hell out. Will had to carry her to bed. No sex for him!" Peter cackles.

"And Edgar?"

"Edgar! Fuck! I left him in our room. I'm a bad friend." Peter slurs.

"Hey Peter, can you go get Edgar?" I ask.

"Yeah. You wanna come with me?" He wiggles his eyebrows at me.

"Hayes, quit flirting with my girlfriend and go get Edgar. And more booze." Eric barks.

"I'm picking up what you're putting down man! Sorry about that. I mean just because I think she's hot doesn't mean anything, I wouldn't fuck her. Wait, yeah I would definitely fuck her, but not while she's with you. You're my friend. Now, if it was Four or someone like him I'd definitely fuck her. Like in a way that she wouldn't be able to..."

"Hayes, enough! Go find booze. Now." Eric barks and he jumps.

"Sir yes sir!" He says as he walks somewhat upright towards the door.

"He was hysterical." I laugh.

"Yeah, he was, except for the part where he wanted to talk about how he'd fuck you." Eric replies as he rolls his eyes. "And his timing? How is it that every time we have a moment he manages to interrupt it?"

"He is literally the king of bad timing."

"More like the king of cock blocking." Eric groans. "Although, he's right."

"He's right about what?" I quirk my eyebrow at him.

"You're fucking hot. Like girl next door meets sexy little doe eyed virgin hot. Like I want to fuck you right now hot." Eric growls. "Your hot, tight and extremely sexy body pressed up against mine." He moves my hair and nips on my neck. "Him talking about fucking my girlfriend makes me a little jealous, but it turns me on too. I think I want to fuck my girlfriend right now. We should go inside."

"Behave. They're coming back." I reply with a smile. We hear the door open and Eric growls into my neck before pulling me back towards his chest and pressing his erection against me.

"You guys were about to fuck weren't you?" Peter asks and Edgar coughs loudly. "You guys go from hate to love faster than anyone I've ever seen."

"Peter!" I yell.

"Seriously, they fucking hated each other. Bickering all the time like an old married couple. Imagine my surprise to walk into our room that first time to find them doing the hibbity jibbity." Peter laughs and Edgar just shakes his head.

"Peter, that's my brother!"

"Oh shit, forgot. We should drink." Peter says as he opens the new bottle and hands it to Edgar. He takes a grateful sip from the bottle.

"I definitely don't want details, but are you two good now?" Edgar asks. I grab Eric's hand.

"Yes, we're good. We were both angry, and speaking irrationally. We talked, we're good." I reply.

"And had make up sex." Peter adds grabbing the bottle from Edgar.

"Again, that's my sister." Edgar replies with a laugh.

"I'm sorry about him, he's a drunk former Candor with no filter." I shake my head before drinking from the bottle of whiskey Edgar hands me.

"Pshhhh! I have more of a filter than Chris. Oh fuck, I forgot to find her. Oh well. No wait, I wasn't supposed to find her, she's passed the hell out." Peter says before taking a small swig from his bottle. "So Ed, can I call you Ed? Or would that be confusing with Edward? Maybe I'll call him Eddie. You know what Ed, I think we're going to be great friends. I mean, I'm great friends with your sister." He turns his attention to me before continuing. "Right Tris? We're great friends now. Not always before because...ok I'll let you in on a little secret Ed, I'm an asshole. But, Tris loves the difficult ones, right Tris?"

"Oh yeah, you're right about that Peter." I reply with amusement.

Peter turns his attention back to Edgar with a satisisfied grin. "So, Ed, how was it being Jeanine's kid?"

"He's not going to remember this conversation tomorrow." I smile. Edgar grins back at me.

"Well, she was always mentally unstable. Big surprise there, right? I think when my dad transferred it just made something inside her snap." He replied.

"He really disliked Jeanine. I would have never suspected they'd previously been involved. He also seemed to truly dislike Erudite in general. I had no idea he'd even transferred from there." I add.

"Jeanine's obsession with divergents drove him away. Plus he'd fallen for your mom. Jeanine hated your mom with a passion. She couldn't understand how someone from Dauntless could transfer to Abnegation, it made her highly suspicious." Edgar says.

"My mom was Dauntless?" I ask.

"Mmhm." Edgar nods.

"Whoa that's kind of awesome. You're a nose and Dauntless really. And a stiff. Like literally all three." Peter laughs at his own stupidity.

"Do you know your mom's maiden name?" Eric asks me.

"Wright." I reply.

"We can look her files up when we're home. It might be nice for you to learn about her childhood." He replies.

"I'd love that. Thank you."

"It's surreal to be sitting here with you two. Eric, I remember you from when we were kids. And now you're dating my sister, whom I hadn't seen for fifteen years." Edgar says, shaking his head.

"Was Eric always an asshole?" Peter asks and I glare at him.

"Way to put me on the spot there Peter. I'm gonna need more of this." He grabbed the bottle from Peter and took a long drink.

"That's a yes." Peter grins.

"I think intense is a better word. Really focused." Edgar replies.

"So, that's the PC way to get around answering that." I reply before taking a small sip of whiskey and handing the bottle to Eric.

"I've always been a loner. Maybe I was a bit abrasive as a kid." Eric replies with a shrug.

"You're abrasive as an adult." Peter says. I snort in laughter. "I have no idea how you managed to land her."

"The mind blowing sex." Eric replies with a smirk and I nearly spit my drink out.

"Not this again." Edgar shakes his head.

"Your little sister is a grown woman Ed. A hot one to boot." Peter slurs.

"Hayes..." Eric says in a warning tone.

"Coulter! Look, I'm not gonna touch her. Because I respect both of you. So cool it big guy." Peter replies. "Anyway Ed, you gotta lighten up. She's an adult, and it's not like you've never banged a chick or two in your time. You're a good looking guy, shits had to happen."

Edgar laughs loudly at Peter's remarks. "Well Peter, I know this may come as a shock to you but I've never 'banged a chick' in my time." Edgar replies using air quotes.

Peter swivels his head towards Edgar. "Wait, wait, wait, wait. You're a virgin?" He asks incredulously.

"Nope, never said that either." Edgar replies with a smug smile before taking a long swig of whiskey.

"Oh, my bad man, so you've _made love_ to a chick or two. Whatever." Peter replies while grabbing for the bottle in Edgar's hand.

"Still not there." Edgar chuckles.

"Ed! What the hell dude. Why must you confuse me? You're not a virgin, but you've never banged a chick. Why are you talking in riddles?" Peter asks with exasperation.

I laugh and shake my head. Edgar and I share a look and wide grins. Eric glances at Peter and shrugs his shoulders at the exchange.

"It's not a riddle Peter. A virgin is someone who hasn't had sex. I just told you that I'm not a virgin, so that obviously means I've had sex before. I also told you I've never banged any chicks, so that means I've not had sex with women." Edgar replies easily and I chuckle as the wheels slowly turn in Peter's alcohol soaked brain.

"You've had sex with dudes!" Peter yells triumphantly.

"There you go, good job Peter." Edgar answers while laughing.

"You're gay!" Peter yells again.

"Indeed I am." Edgar replies.

"Hot damn! I figured something out on my own." Peter slurs with a shit eating grin on his face, causing even Eric to laugh loudly.

"Ed, you in a relationship?" Peter asks.

"Why, do you want to date me?" Edgar answers with a smirk.

"What? No, not that. Don't get me wrong, you're a good looking dude, and it's obvious that you and your sister have some good genes because she's smoking hot. I'd totally tap that." Peter rambles.

"Jesus Christ Hayes will you stop talking about my woman like that!" Eric yells and I squeeze his hand.

"He's drunk, ignore him." I whisper.

"He's annoying. Has he ever tried anything with you?" Eric whispers back.

"No, never. He's just doing it to get under your skin." I reply.

"Coulter, chill dude. I'm gonna stop talking about her. I'm gonna try really hard mmkay? I can't help what comes out of my mouth right now. Sorry man. Ok so Ed, relationship? Boyfriend?" Peter slurs.

"He died." He answers before grabbing the bottle and taking a gulp.

"Fuck man. I'm sorry." Peter replies. "I'm an epic fail at conversation tonight."

"Relax Peter. It's not like you knew. I haven't really talked about him." Edgar replies.

"Do you want to tell us about him?" I ask and I notice Edgar's eyes light up.

"His name was Asher, he was an Erudite born Dauntless transfer. He failed initiation and was sent away." He frowns, but continues. "We met a little over three years ago, the first night he was on his own he was pretty terrified. I was pretty much an old pro at living the factionless life at that point, so he was brought to me to look after. He was having a hard time, not only was he thrown out of his chosen faction but he'd met someone during his initiation class that he'd become involved with and had feelings for. He lost it all. We just kind of developed from there, being friends first and then one night we decided to stop fighting the attraction that was there between us and it became something more. We were together from then on, and we were happy. Then it happened, a riot broke out between some of our friends and the Dauntless patrol. We literally got dragged into it, Ash and I were out on a walk and ended up smack in the middle of fucking chaos. He was stabbed, by one of our own men at that, and he bled out in my arms on that street."

"Oh Edgar, I'm so sorry." I reply, reaching over for his hand and giving it a squeeze.

"I'm sorry for your loss Edgar. I knew Asher, he was in my initiate class and I also knew him from Erudite. He was a good guy. He made it all the way to the end of initiation, but was the first name under the line for cuts." Eric replies.

"Thank you. It was six months ago that he died, but it's still hard sometimes. I've tried moving on, at least physically, but mentally I still hold back a bit." He replies.

"I'm sorry man. I shouldn't have brought it up." Peter says and Edgar shakes his head.

"It's ok, really. Its nice to be able to talk about him with someone." He replies.

"Tobias was in that intiate class too, he may have some stories to share about Asher." I offer.

"We did talk about him a bit. Tobias recognized him during one of his earliest visits with his mother. He told me a pretty funny story about a girl in their initiation class who pursued Ash relentlessly even though he made it clear he wasn't interested." Edgar replies.

"Sabrina." Eric replies. "It was embarrassing. She'd prance around after her showers in a towel that she'd keep 'accidentally' dropping. Asher got so fed up that he bought her a bag full of closepins and demonstrated how she could use one on her towel to keep it from falling."

"Now that's funny." Edgar replies with a laugh. "Definitely sounds like my Ash."

"Sounds like that one girl who was in our class Tris. Megan? Maggie? Whatever her name was." Peter says.

"Megan. She was ridiculous. She tried to seduce every single one of the transfer boys, and several of the Dauntless borns too." I answer with a headshake.

"She succeeded. When I went to escort her out after she was cut I caught her having sex with Al." Eric adds.

"No freaking way. The big doofus got some ass?" Peter asks.

"At least once before he was cut." Eric agrees.

"So gross." I shiver.

"Aww Tris, are you upset that Al didn't wait for you?" Peter asks.

"Careful Hayes, your asshole personality has started creeping out." I smirk.

"Ed, your sister is a heartbreaker. There were sooooooooooo many guys who wanted her." Peter says.

"Oh really? This I'd like to hear." Eric replies, I give him a horrified look.

"No, we are not talking about this." I shake my head.

"Oh yeah we are. Let's see. First there was Al. Big, dumb, Candor Al. He quietly pined away for our sweet little Abnegation girl, until one day she did something so bold that he thought he actually had a chance and he spilled his guts to her." Peter says.

"What was that?" Edgar asks.

"You see, our lovable idiot Al couldn't throw a knife for shit, which was much to the ire of our ruthless leader over here. So, Eric demanded that Al stand in front of the target and he was about to make Four throw knifes at the big dummy until your little smart mouthed sister spoke up." Peter replies.

"What did you do?" Edgar asks me and I glare at Peter.

"She told Eric to stop, and then lectured him that bullying was a sign of cowardice. So Eric being the asshole he is made your sister take Al's place and had Four throw knives at her. Told her if she flinched she was gonna be factionless. You could have met her a lot earlier if she wasn't so damn stubborn." Peter laughs.

"You ordered knives to be thrown at my sister? To punish her for mouthing off?" Edgar asks Eric with a hint of anger.

"I was trying to teach her a lesson, and I knew Four wouldn't miss. He is deadly accurate with knives, and besides he had it bad for her anyway." Eric shrugs.

"Did you learn your lesson?" Edgar asks me.

"Hell no she didn't. She was constantly defying him and pissing him off." Peter laughs. "Oh, so yeah besides Al, there was Uriah too. He was just crushing though since he's been in love with Marlene since birth. Well Four was a given, you all saw how that worked out. And then there's me."

"You're brave to admit that in front of Eric." Edgar says.

"You missed him going on and on about how much he'd like to fuck her before he went to get you." Eric replies angrily, thankfully Edgar steers the conversation somewhere else.

"How'd you two get together?" Edgar gestures to Eric and me.

"You don't want to know." I answer with a headshake.

"Hate sex turned into love sex." Peter offers. I kick him hard and he just laughs.

"I was a true romantic and admitted that I was in love with her for the first time in front of a room full of people while I was under truth serum." Eric replies before taking a drink.

"You're shitting me." Edgar says.

"Nope." I add, taking the bottle that Eric offers. "Afterward I refused to talk about it, or acknowledge it and then in the middle of another conversation I slipped and told him I loved him."

"You two are so fucking weird." Peter says.

"Don't be jealous." I say with a smirk and Peter scoffs.

"If I wanted to be in a relationship I could be." Peter says.

"With who?" Eric asks. "Your hand doesn't count." I nearly choke on my whiskey at that comment and Eric pats me on the back while laughing.

"Fuck you Prior." Peter slurs.

"I think we already established you want to fuck my sister." Edgar quips. Eric tips his bottle and Edgar clinks his with it.

"Fuck all of you." Peter huffs.

"I'm flattered, but I like pussy, specifically hers." Eric replies.

"I like dick, but I only want his." I point at Eric.

"How about you Ed?" Peter wiggles his eyebrows at Edgar.

Edgar cracks up laughing. "I don't do straight guys, but if you decide you want to embrace your gay I'll be there for you."

Peter laughs loudly and grabs the bottle from Edgar. "I'll keep that in mind."

We continue to share whiskey and stories with each other long into the night. It's nice to forget about responsibilities and stress for a least a little while.


	23. Chapter 23

Eric POV

When my alarm starts blaring at 5:00 am it takes me several minutes to even figure out where I am. Tris is practically on top of me, with her long hair fanned out all over me. We're both naked, and uncovered. I glance across the room and say a silent thank you when I realize the other bed is empty. I grab my tablet and silence the alarm, and I start rubbing Tris' back.

"No." She growls, burying her face in my neck.

"Trust me, I don't want to be awake any more than you do." I reply.

"We're naked?" Tris asks and I chuckle.

"Yeah. We're alone." I reply.

"I hope the nakedness didn't start before we got to the the room." She replies.

"I doubt that. But, since we're both naked, there is something we could be doing." I say.

"Taking a shower?" She asks and I can feel her smiling against my neck.

"Sure, I love shower sex." I say as I grab her ass.

"Well c'mom tiger. Let's go hope for an empty shower." She says as she grabs our discarded clothes from the floor.

Once we're dressed, we head to the shared bathroom and find it empty. We quickly get undressed and grab the larger of the shower stalls. I waste no time, moving Tris so that she's sitting on the bench inside the shower and I drop to my knees in front of her. I spread her legs and immediately drag my tongue through her wet folds.

"You're always so wet for me." I whisper as I begin to trail my tongue around her clit, listening to her breath go ragged. I glance up and see she's biting on her own knuckles in an effort to stay quiet. "Oh I'm going to make you really need to bite down baby." I whisper and push two fingers inside of her while I continue to gently suck and nibble on her swollen bundle of nerves. She tastes amazing, fuck this woman turns me on like no one has been able to before. I have to rest my arm across her stomach to keep her still and soon I can feel her muscles clench hard on my fingers as she arches her back. I make sure she rides out her orgasm before moving from between her legs.

"Do you want to fuck me against the wall, or do you want me to ride you?" She whispers to me as she lazily strokes me, her words are getting me harder than any physical stimulation.

"I want to please you baby." I say as I pull her to stand in front of me.

I lean down to kiss her, and she licks my lips for entrance. I let her dominate me, enjoying her taste while I explore the rest of her body with my hands. She backs up against the wall and I take my cue to lift her by the back of her thighs. We kiss each other deeply as I enter her, her moans escaping to my mouth. We work at a slower pace, never breaking our kisses, and the little noises that escape from her are making me crazy.

I hear someone enter the bathroom and I freeze. Tris' eyes widen and I rest my head on her forehead and stifle a laugh. When we hear another shower turn on, I slowly begin moving against Tris again.

"We can't, someone's in here." She whispers softly next to my ear.

"Oh we can, and we will. Just gotta keep it quiet." I smirk as I pick up my pace. The look of pure pleasure on her face tells me she definitely doesn't want me to stop. She leans in to kiss me, and begins meeting my thrusts. As much as we're trying to keep quiet, neither of us can help the soft noises we each make as our pleasure takes over.

"Fuck." She whispers next to my ear as her walls start to clench around me, and it causes me to cum with her. We both try to slow our breathing as I pull out of her. We quickly wash each other, sharing kisses along the way until we're finally ready to step out.

We get dressed in the small dressing area outside of the shower stall, both of us laughing out loud at the awkwardness of trying to move in the small space. As soon as we step out of the shower area completely I see Peter standing at the sink brushing his teeth with a towel around his waist.

"Third times the charm, huh?" He smirks at me. "I knew that eventually I'd walk in on the act and you two didn't disappoint."

"You listened to us?" Tris asks and Peter laughs.

"You two weren't as quiet as you thought. Besides, I was already in the shower when I first heard you, figured I may as well just finish showering. The soundtrack you provided was just an added bonus." He wiggles his eyebrows suggestively at Tris.

Tris blushes furiously. "I told you we should have stopped." She says, smacking me with her towel.

"There was no way that could have happened." I smirk. "So Peter, I'm surprised to see you upright and awake this early, considering how absolutely blasted you were last night."

"Eh, I wasn't _that_ drunk." He shrugs.

"Really? So you'd have said everything you did last night even if you weren't drinking at all?" I ask evenly. Tris looks at me through her mirror, giving me a hard look. I ignore her and continue pressing Peter. "What's wrong, cat got your tongue?" I ask him.

"What are you talking about?" Peter asks slowly.

"It doesn't matter." Tris begins but I interrupt.

"You don't remember Peter?" I ask. The bathroom door opens and Four walks in. He looks around quickly and it's obvious by the look on his face he's uncomfortable. He steps back towards the door.

"Maybe I should come back later." He quietly says and before I can answer Tris speaks up.

"No, you can stay. We all have to share this space." She says. "We were just about to leave anyway."

"Some of us seem to forget that we're sharing space though." Peter smirks.

"Kind of like how you wanted to share Tris last night?" I spit, quickly losing the humor in the situation.

"Eric..." Tris says and she tries to pull me towards her. I shrug off her hand.

"What the fuck is your deal, man?" Peter asks irritably.

"You are." I growl.

"Dude, are you serious right now? You two were just fucking in a shared bathroom and you want to get pissy when I give you shit about it?" Peter asks and Four tries to open the bathroom door to exit, but Peter presses his hand against it. "Four, you might as well stay. I might need some backup if Eric decides to go all caveman on me."

"I'd say I have a right to, since all you could do was talk about how much you want to fuck my woman last night." I retort angrily.

"Eric, he was _drunk_." Tris reasons.

"I said that?" Peter laughs, which pisses me off more.

"Yeah, and I don't see how it's so funny." I reply.

"Look I admit it, I was drunk, ok? Shit man, I didn't mean anything by it. Its not like you haven't said shit that you didn't mean, am I right? I didn't even realize the two of you were back together last night, so chill man. I'm not here to make a move on your girlfriend." He replies flippantly.

"She's my fiancée." I reply loudly, causing Tris to jump.

"Your _what_?" Four asks.

"Fiancée. Soon to be wife. Is this confusing to you?" I sneer at him.

"Actually, it is. Didn't think you wanted her, I mean that is exactly what you told me yesterday. You even told me to go ahead and make my move since you were finished with her and you didn't think she'd hold on to a lost cause." Four replies with anger.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Tris asks incredulously. "So, you were just going to hand me off to Four and yet you want to get pissed off at Peter because he drunkenly hit on me?"

"Tris, we talked about this..." I begin.

"We most certainly did _not_ talk about your conversation with Four. Did you really say that?" She asks.

"Tris, it's not like that. I was speaking out of anger." I reply.

"What did you say to him?" She asks.

"We should have this conversation in private." I reply.

"Really? You want privacy after your little display already this morning? Tell me if it's true, Eric. Did you tell Four to take me since you were done?" She asks.

"I will tell you anything you want me to, but not here. Not like this. Please?" I whisper to her and she shakes her head.

"No, you can finish your pissing contest with them. It's not important." She says as she walks toward the bathroom door. "Oh, by the way, I never answered you so stop putting a label on me just to prove a point to the people who you _think_ are a threat to what I feel for you. This is further proof that you don't want to marry me because you love me, you just want to stake a claim." She adds without ever looking at me. I watch as she walks out the door.

"Fuck!" I yell as I punch the wall. I pull my arm back to punch again when Peter roughly pushes me away from it. I turn towards him ready to strike and Four holds me back. "Get the fuck off of me!" I shout.

"What the hell?" Zeke asks as he rushes through the door. "What is going on here?" He asks as he plants himself between Peter and me.

"He's a jealous asshole." Peter says as he leans against the wall.

"Fuck you Hayes." I spit, struggling against the hold that Four has on me. "Four, get the fuck off of me!"

"Not a chance. You need to calm down." Zeke says. "What is wrong with you?"

"These two. Always interfering in shit with Tris and me." I growl.

"Oh really? I say stuff when I'm drunk and you blow a gasket, and he just recalls a conversation that actually happened between the two of you and you go off the rails, yet it's _our_ fault?" Peter chides and I lunge towards him.

"Eric, calm the fucking hell down!" Four says from behind me and I glare at Zeke.

"Zeke, if you don't get him the fuck off of me I'm going to lose my shit. I can't be around him right now." I say and Zeke steps closer to me.

"You are our _head leader_ Eric. Act like it. If you and Tris can't figure this shit out then one of you will have to go. At the rate you've been going these last two days, it'll be _you_." He says carefully.

"You're threatening me?" I ask angrily.

"Yes." Zeke replies simply. We glare at each other for several seconds before he speaks again. "You are the only one who's continuing to let your personal life interfere with your professional life, so speaking as both your colleague and your friend please fix this shit. We have a little over two hours before the deliberations about Evelyn start and I need your head in the game Eric. I don't know what in the hell has you so hot and cold, but figure it out. Now, if he lets you go, are you gonna behave?" He asks.

"This is bullshit." I scoff.

"Eric, grow the fuck up. Can I trust that you're not gonna swing on any of us?" Zeke asks angrily.

"I'm cool." I gruffly reply.

"Get your fucking head in the game." He says to me and then looks over my shoulder at Four. "Let him go."

Four drops his grip on me and pushes me slightly away from him. I turn around and step towards him.

"Eric, he's not your issue. Walk away." Zeke warns.

"Why did you say that shit in front of Tris?" I ask Four.

"You should have told her. I can't believe you tried to fix things by proposing to her." He replies.

"It's none of your goddamn business!" I roar.

We stand almost nose to nose, with Peter and Zeke hovering closely, ready to step in. Four glares at me, but holds his ground as he begins to speak.

"You're right, it's not my business or anyone else's. This is between you and Tris." He says without malice. We don't break eye contact, but I back away. I walk out of the bathroom and head towards the roof, hoping to find Tris.

I barely make it off of the corridor before I run directly into her. I have no time to react as she throws her arms around me and nuzzles her face in my neck.

"It's done. Everything we said in anger to each other and to everyone else while we were fighting is in the past. Can we agree not to hold it against each other anymore?" She asks.

I could have almost guaranteed that she was going to tear into me because of what happened in the bathroom, but as always she finds a way to surprise me.

"Yes, absolutely. Fuck Tris, I'm sorry. I love you." I reply as I hold her closer to me. "There are things I need to say, can we go to our room?" I ask and Tris nods. I take her hand and lead her to the room. We walk inside and sit on our bed and I take some time to gather my thoughts before I speak again.

"I'm a jealous guy. It's not something I want to be, but it just happens. I'm possessive, not because I think I own you, and it's not because I don't think you're capable of taking care of yourself, ok? I've just never loved anyone before and I'm insecure. I don't know what I'm doing, and obviously it shows. I just need you to have faith in me."

"Do you just want to marry me because you're afraid I'll leave?" She asks.

"Tris, I want to marry you because I love you and I want you forever. I'm ready whenever you're ready, and if you need time to believe that then so be it. I'll prove it to you every day. You're my endgame, I want a future with you. I hope that you want a future with me. I hope you want to have kids with me one day. I know I'm doing a terrible job of showing you this but I love you and I want you forever."

"You're my forever too Eric." She replies.

I'm shocked, and it must show based on the look on her face.

"I'll do whatever you want. I'll get a ring and get on a knee. I'll do my best to stop with the caveman shit. Oh and I need to talk to Edgar, I mean it's just the right thing to do right, getting your brother's blessing and all?" I ramble.

Tris puts her hands on my arms and squeezes gently. "Hey, we have time, ok? You don't have to rush, or worry. I'm not going anywhere."

"We're ok, right? This isn't just a distraction for you is it?" I ask.

"No, of course this isn't a distraction. I love you. Why would you even ask that?" She replies.

"I just want to be sure. I want to make sure you're truly happy with me, and that I'm not just seeing what I want to see."

"Eric, do you remember when we decided to make our relationship official?" She asks.

"Yeah, it was right here in this room. I'll never forget that day." I reply honestly.

"So we made a decision that when we opened that door and faced the real world again that there would be no doubts about what we were to each other. I want that again." She replies.

"Ok." I reply with a smile, remembering the last conversation we had like this.

"Just ok, huh? What does that mean Eric?" Tris asks with a sexy smile as she moves to sit on my lap.

"I think it means that maybe we're engaged..." I reply as I softly press my lips to hers.

"Are you asking or telling?" She asks against my lips.

I lean back and take a long look at her. This girl has singlehandedly made me a different man and I fucking love her for it. Her hazel eyes have a glint to them, and a slightly humorous expression. Her long dirty blonde hair is hanging over her shoulder in a braid, still damp from our shower earlier. She has no makeup on, but she doesn't need it, not that she'll ever listen when I tell her just how fucking hot she is.

"Will you marry me Tris?" I ask.

"Yes." She replies before she leans in and kisses me deeply. We are interrupted by a sharp knock.

"Come in." I yell and the door opens, Tori pops her head in.

"Do you two have a few minutes to meet before the deliberation meeting about Evelyn?" Tori asks.

"Yes, good idea." Tris replies as she stands up. We follow Tori out of the room and to a small conference room, where the rest of our leadership team is waiting. Shauna immediately notices that Tris and I are holding hands.

"It's nice to see the two of you together. Can we assume you've resolved your differences?" Shauna asks in her usual blunt manner.

"We did, and let me apologize for allowing our personal lives to interfere with an important decision. That will not happen again." I reply.

"I'd like to apologize again too. It was unprofessional and uncalled for." Tris adds.

"We certainly understand the tension and accept the apology. No hard feelings. I just hope that your relationship can survive future leadership duties, and vice versa. I'd hate to see either suffer again." Tori replies.

"Our relationship will certainly survive." I reply as a Tris squeezes my hand. We take a seat and Tori begins speaking.

"I know we don't have to vote as a faction on this, but I just wanted to see where everyone was leaning." Tori begins. "I've talked to Four, and even though the chances are slim to none that Marcus is even alive, he acknowledges he didn't stay put to make sure he was dead."

"You also have to consider the serums." Zeke adds.

"No, I don't think we need to take serums into consideration at all. Tris has gone through the same serum testing, and she's aware of her surroundings and can separate fantasy from reality." Shauna replies.

"I have to agree with Zeke. The serums, and the sims are horrible. First, we need to consider that Four incompacitated him, but didn't kill him. But more importantly, I think we also have to consider that Four killed his dad in a sim, and that he wasn't able to ever determine that it wasn't reality." Tris says.

Everyone in the room, save myself, gapes at Tris. Zeke slowly shakes his head, opening his mouth to speak and them clamping it shut repeatedly.

"Do you really have that issue? I mean do you still have issues determining what's real?" Shauna finally asks.

"Yes. The simulations were incredibly realistic. I have Eric to help me to distinguish the sim from reality, but Four doesn't have that." Tris replies. "Four is really good at looking for tells," Tris says, causing looks of confusion from everyone in the room. "Sorry, a tell is something that's slightly off in a sim, whether it be about a person or the environment you're in. Four is good at finding the tell of a sim and getting himself out of it. It's been my experience that in the more emotionally charged sims it's incredibly difficult to find the tell. I went through a sim in which Eric died and I almost couldn't get myself out of it, and the last sim I went through when my heart stopped I never found the tell. I thought it was real, and it almost killed me. Unfortunately, I'm still having issues separating fantasy from reality, which is causing issues in my personal relationships." She finishes quietly. A realization settles over the other members of leadership, and they now understand that the volatile nature of the relationship between Tris and I isn't due to incompatibility, it's due to two incredibly similar people trying to navigate through the damage caused by the serums and sims Tris was subjected to.

"I think letting Evelyn live is a mistake. She might be telling the truth, and she may know exactly where Marcus is, but there's a chance that she could beat the memory wipe just like Tris did. And if she does we send her right back into Marcus' arms and together they start their plans to take over the government again. I say we take the chance that he's alive and we deal with him when the time is right, and we execute Evelyn like she deserves." I say.

"I agree." Tris adds.

"Same." Zeke chimes in.

"Marcus is dangerous..." Shauna begins and Zeke cuts her off.

"And he's an unknown factor. No ones seen or heard from him since the day they dropped Tris off at Erudite." Zeke argues.

"There's a chance that Evelyn is bluffing and just trying to save her ass." Tori replies.

"Honestly, I think the better chance is she's telling the truth but is hedging her bets on beating the memory serum. She's done enough testing and research to know the ins and outs of the serum, and she's well versed in its inner workings and side effects." Tris adds.

"So, what do you suggest we do if she's executed and takes the knowledge of Marcus' whereabouts to her grave?" Shauna asks.

"If he's even alive." Tori states.

"We'd be foolish to assume he's dead. Johanna's contacts haven't been able to confirm his death, there's been no body found. If he is alive, he's hiding well. The thing is he's much too arrogant and self important to stay in hiding for too long once he realizes he can be on top again. With Jeanine gone and Evelyn too, he'll come out to stake his claim in the government he thinks he's entitled to run." I reply.

There's a quick knock on the door and Jack Kang pokes his head in. "It's time to gather, the other faction leaders are headed to the south conference room." He says before ducking out of the door, leaving it open behind him. We all exit the room and head to the conference room as a united front.

The meeting isn't as long as we thought it was going to be with an overwhelming majority voting to uphold the execution of Evelyn Johnson Eaton. There were only two members of leadership who voted for her memory wipe, not surpringly both were junior leaders from Abnegation. The major shock was a unaminous vote from Amity in favor of execution. When Johanna voted in favor of the execution, her reasoning echoed throughout the room. She gave an empassioned speech explaining just how much Amity was effected by continuing to maintain records of the survivors and deceased from both the war and the following uprising.

Jack quickly scheduled the execution to take place immediately after the meeting adjourned, and Dauntless leadership wasted no time in inspecting our weapons. Evelyn had no last words, refusing to look at or speak to anyone, including her own son. When the triggers were pulled it was Zeke who fired the fatal shot, and soon the body was taken away and the cleaning and sanitation team in place. Even with so many of the other faction leadership present, it was a surprisingly subdued and uneventful execution. I never expected to become so numb and unaffected by death.

Our factionmates were quick to begin leaving Candor to head back to Dauntless. Within the hour, everyone had gone home except Tris, Edgar, Christina, Will and myself. I glance over and watch as Christina and Will are in an animated conversation with Tris. I glance at Edgar and gesture for him to walk with me. We're able to slip out of the room without anyone following.

"Everything ok?" Edgar asks as we walk around the busy hallways of Candor. I'm not quite sure where to go, so I end up leading us into a small conference room.

"I need to talk to you." I reply awkwardly.

"Um, ok. What's on your mind?" He replies. He sits on the edge of the table while I pace nervously around the room. I notice he and Tris have similar features, and even their body language is similar. Tris can rarely relax, and even when she appears to be at rest she's poised to strike at any time.

"Well, it's about Tris." I reply.

"I figured as much." He replies with a smirk.

"I don't even know how to say any of this." I reply, furrowing my eyebrows and scowling at the floor in front of me.

"Is she pregnant?" He asks and I gape at him.

"No, she's not pregnant. Way to jump to the worst possible conclusion." I reply and Edgar laughs. His posture relaxes.

"Eric, whatever it is just say it. Unless you're telling me you're breaking up with her again, or cheating on her or some horrible shit I'm pretty sure we're ok." Edgar replies.

"I love Tris. I know these past few days since you and I have met haven't shown you the depth of my feelings for her. I just want you to know that what you've seen isn't an accurate depiction of the relationship she and I have." I say, stumbling over my words and pausing to try to gather my thoughts.

"Hey, the two of you are adults, and you've known my sister a lot longer than I have. Even though she and I did meet as kids, she doesn't even remember it. At any rate, you don't owe me an explanation." Edgar replies.

"Well, I kind of do. You're the only family she has left, and vice versa. That means a lot moving forward for the two of you. Ok, what I'm trying to say is that I love your sister, she's the only woman I've ever felt this way about, and I want to marry her. I've asked her to marry me, but no matter what having your blessing is important to me. I need you to know I'll love and protect her for the rest of my life." I finally get everything out, feeling slightly embarrassed for the word vomit, but also proud that I was able to actually put myself out there.

"Well that was unexpected." Edgar replies, slightly shaking his head and looking at me with an expression I can't decipher. "I didn't know much about you, other than Evelyn despised you, until I was reunited with my sister. Tris talked about you all the time when she was in Erudite. Her love for you, and the desire to protect you and eventually be reunited with you kept her fighting for her life. You are important to her, and how hard you fought to save her life repeatedly shows me how much she means to you. You absolutely have my blessing, even though you truly don't need it. Thank you for thinking of me."

Edgar extends his hand and I easily shake it. I didn't realize how important it was to me to have his approval until the two of us were sitting in this room together.

"Thanks man. I appreciate you saying that." I reply.

We walk back to where we left everyone and I immediately see Will and Chris, sitting close to each other and talking in whispers. Edgar clears his throat and Chris looks up with a grin.

"We ready to go home?" I ask and both Chris and Will nod enthusiastically.

"Yes! Where's Tris?" Chris asks.

"Not sure, Edgar and I were talking. I thought she was here with you." I reply.

"Nope. She left the room shortly after you did. You seriously don't know where she went? You're just messing with me, right?" Christina asks nervously.

"Chris, I'm not fucking around here. She wasn't with us. Is anyone else from Dauntless still here?" I ask.

"No, everyone cleared out already. We were just waiting for you guys so we could leave together." Will replies.

"She's probably just in the bathroom. How about we split up and look for her? Meet back here in half an hour? If anyone finds her have us paged back to this room." Edgar suggests and we all agree.

We leave the room and go our separate ways. I check the shared bathroom, the conference rooms and with Jack's assistant and come up empty. I go to the room she and I were sharing and find our duffel bag sitting on the bed where we left it, undisturbed.

We meet back in the conference room all empty handed. Edgar and I head to Jack's office where we are met with a frantic Jack.

"I didn't know you were still here. Zeke just called me, the cameras have been down city wide for the past hour and he's been unable to get them to come back up." He quickly explains.

I quickly order Zeke to send the best tech guys out and Edgar and I take off on our own to look for Tris. This time, I have no idea where to even begin.


	24. Chapter 24

**AN: I appreciate your reviews and follows, and I especially appreciate your patience with my erratic posting schedule for all three of my active stories. For those of you who follow my other story "I Think I Wanna Marry You", I lost the entire rest of that story's outline, notes and unedited chapters when my laptop crashed. It was the one story I hadn't yet moved to my iPad. I'm working on recreating what I lost, but it's a frustratingly slow process. Please don't give up on it, I promise I won't.**

Tris POV

My eyes feel like they've been filled with sand when I begin to open them. My head is pounding and I have an overall feeling of heaviness. I move the heavy wool blanket and carefully try to sit up in my bed. A wave of dizziness rushes over me, and I quickly steady myself on the edge of my bed with my feet planted firmly on the floor in front of me. I focus my attention on my bare feet and take several deep breaths to relax my erratic breathing. My long nightgown is twisted around my body uncomfortably, and I realize I must have moved more than normal in my sleep last night. Maybe it was a nightmare that left me in this daze this morning. I slowly lift my head and look around my room. The familiar grey walls are bare, and the room is sparsely furnished. I look at my desk and notice a pretty glass sculpture reflecting the light coming in through the lone window. I try to remember how I obtained such a beautiful thing, it is much too indulgent to keep something like that, however I can't seem to tear my eyes away from it.

I gingerly lift up from the bed, placing a hand on the wall to steady myself. I've never had a headache quite like this, but I remember my father suffering from them from time to time when I was younger. I smile when I think of my father, I wonder if he's already left for work this morning. He's been so busy lately that I've barely seen him. I should really stay in bed since I'm feeling so poorly, but I'd like to catch my father if he's still here.

I slowly make my way down the staircase and the familiar smell of coffee fills the air. I see someone sitting cross legged at the dining room table, an Erudite newspaper blocking their face.

"Good morning Dad." I say in a stronger voice than I thought was possible with my throbbing headache. He lowers the paper and I see it's not my father, but instead his coworker Marcus Eaton.

"Good morning Beatrice." He replies with a smile.

"I'm so sorry Marcus. I thought it was my father sitting at the table. My headache must be affecting my mind." I reply.

"Nonsense, Beatrice. It's quite alright if you call me Dad. You are my daughter in law after all." He remarks with a warm smile. I look around and realize that although the home shares the familiar basics with all other Abnegation houses, I'm actually not in my house at all. Marcus notices me looking around warily and he stands up, gently taking my arm and leading me to a seat at the table.

"Your daughter in law?" I stutter, causing Marcus to chuckle lightly.

"That bump on your head really must have thrown you for a loop. You're married to my son, Tobias." He replies with a smile.

Married? How can I not remember being married? Tobias and I hadn't even talked about marriage to my recollection, actually the last fuzzy memories I have aren't of even of Tobias and I being together, and yet Marcus is telling me I'm not only with Tobias but I am married to him.

"I'll get your breakfast." He says as he busies himself scooping some oatmeal.

"No, you shouldn't have to do that. I'm quite capable." I say as I try to stand up. Marcus places a hand on the back of my chair before speaking.

"Beatrice, it's fine dear. You've been in the bed recovering for days. The least I can do is serve your breakfast now that you're finally on the mend." He replies as he sits a bowl of oatmeal and cup of coffee in front of me. I wrap my hands around the mug, grateful for the warmth.

"Marcus, forgive me for not knowing the answer already, but could you tell me why I am here and not at home with my husband or parents?" I ask tentatively.

"Tobias has been recovering from his injuries here too." He answers vaguely.

"What about my parents?" I ask. "Why can't I remember anything?" I ask quietly.

Marcus sighs and shifts uncomfortably in the chair across the table from me. "I didn't realize your injury would affect your memory the same way it did with Tobias. There was a war Beatrice. You and Tobias barely survived. When I finally got to the two of you, you were hanging on by a thread. You both had suffered terrible head injuries. You both spent many weeks in the main hospital in Erudite, and finally you both had recovered enough to be released to my care."

"I don't remember any of that." I reply. My head is spinning, however it is less from my physical injuries and more from the information I've just learned. "What about my parents?" I ask.

"Why don't we wait for Tobias to come down? He's just in the shower." Marcus replies, quickly getting up from the table and busying himself with idle chores.

I nervously sip at my coffee, thankful for the warmth it provides. I stare at the table in front of me, scouring my mind for any types of memories I may have of the war I just learned about. I remember an office, an oversized wooden desk and a large man wrapping me in his arms as I cried over the news of my parent's death.

"They died, didn't they?" I ask out loud, watching as Marcus stops moving. He slowly turns and faces me, drying his hands on a towel.

"Beatrice..." He begins. For once he doesn't seem to have the answers.

"I already know." I reply in a flat tone. "I don't know how I know this, but I remember being told about their deaths and someone comforting me."

Marcus' expression turns hard and he narrows his eyes at me. "Who comforted you? Who told you?" His voice is soft but his eyes are piercing in to me. He has the same dark blue eyes that his son has, and while I like their intensity on Tobias, on Marcus they're quite scary.

"I don't know. But based on your reaction I know it's true." I reply. I can feel the warm tears trailing down my cheeks, but somehow it feels like I've mourned them for a long time already. Before Marcus can say anything else, we are joined by Tobias.

"You're awake, and out of bed too. That's great progress." He says as he sits down next to me. He leans over and kisses my cheek. "What's wrong?"

"My parents..." I whisper and Tobias places his arms around me gently. I lay my head on his shoulder and breathe his scent in. It's familiar, but not what I want. I study him carefully. He's not wearing Abnegation clothes, and neither is Marcus. Tobias has healing bruises on his face, and I can see the remnants of a split lip.

"Marcus, can you tell me about the war?" I ask. Tobias chokes on the coffee he was drinking, and breaks out into coughs as I pat his back. "You ok?" I ask.

"Yeah, sorry it went down the wrong way." He replies.

"The short version is that Dauntless turned against Abnegation. They came in here and attacked us, shooting to kill everyone who was in their way." Marcus says.

"Why?" Tobias asks and I don't miss the dark way his father looks at him.

"They wanted control of the government, at any cost." Marcus replies angrily. "I lost all of my colleagues in their attack. We've had to start over."

"Were you there when my parents died?" I ask carefully.

"No." He replies somberly. "But, they died protecting something." He stands and moves towards a hidden cupboard, pulling out a small but beautifully decorated metal box. He sits the box on the table in front of me before taking his seat across from me. Tobias shifts uncomfortably next to me, and I feel him gently thread our fingers together. While the gesture is nice, it feels completely wrong.

"Have you seen this before?" Marcus asks me.

I remove my hand from Tobias' and gingerly pick up the box, finding it heavier than I imagined. I study the box carefully, noticing on five of the six sides have the familiar symbols representing each of our factions etched into the metal, while the sixth side has a symbol I've never seen. As I turn it over in my hands, it makes no noise, making me think that whatever is inside is solidly attached to the box itself.

"I recognize most of the symbols, I remember the factions, but as for this symbol and the box itself I have no memory of it at all. How do we open it?" I ask.

"If it's what I think it is only you could open it Beatrice." He replies. I sit the box down again and look at Marcus. His expression is a mask, but his eyes betray the swirling emotions this box is evoking in him.

Tobias takes my hand again and this time I'm grateful as my nervousness is spilling over. "How would I be able to open it?" I finally ask.

Marcus smiles, and it's not the comforting smile he's been offering, this time it seems more sinister. "You see Beatrice, you were a very valuable part of the faction war. You are the only known divergent to test positive for all five factions, and we believe this box could only be opened by someone who could pass a sim for every faction." He says.

"We? Who is we?" Tobias asks.

"Jeanine Matthews was one, and also your mother Tobias, may God rest her soul." He replies.

"My mother is dead?" He asks.

"I'm afraid so. Yet another casualty of the war that Dauntless started. Jeanine too." Marcus replies. I squeeze Tobias' hand and look over at him. His hard expression is betraying no emotion.

"Who is Jeanine?" I ask Marcus.

"She was the head leader of Erudite. All of the leaders were targeted Beatrice." He replies.

"I don't understand. Why would my parents be protecting this? Why was it worth their lives?" I ask, tracing the patterns on the box idly with my finger.

"We believe it contains information about what's outside the wall." Marcus answers.

"There's nothing out there." Tobias replies. "That's what we've heard our whole lives."

"Why would our ancestors have built a wall around us if there was nothing out there that could threaten us?" Marcus asks his son.

"How do we know the wall was built to keep anything out? What if it's here to keep us in?" I ask and I hear Tobias draw in a sharp breath next to me.

Marcus smiles again. "I knew you'd understand Beatrice. You just needed an open mind." He briefly snickers before composing himself again.

"How do I open it? What do we need to do?" I ask while ignoring his strange behavior.

"Everything we need is at Erudite, but it's not safe to travel yet. We need to make sure that we keep you secure, Dauntless is after you too Beatrice, and if they get ahold of you or the box there's no telling what would happen. We have to keep that box, and its contents, out of the wrong hands." Marcus says. "I have people working on getting exactly what we need from Erudite moved to a secure place. When the time is right, we will move."

"I understand." I reply.

"Beatrice, is there anything we can do to make you more comfortable?" Marcus asks.

"I'd really like to have a shower. Do I have clothes here?" I ask.

"Yes. Tobias, you'll help your wife, won't you?" Marcus asks.

"Of course." Tobias answers and he helps me to my feet. He awkwardly holds my hand as he leads me up the staircase. We step inside the room I woke up in previously and he closes the door behind us. "Does any of this feel strange to you?" He whispers.

"What do you mean?" I whisper back.

"Do you remember anything before waking up this morning?" He asks quietly.

"I remember some things, like my parents, and I knew who Marcus was as soon as I saw him. I recognized you too. As for memories, it's like huge chunks of my life are missing. I had something, I mean it was almost a memory I suppose. When I asked him about my parents he was hesitant to answer, and his hesitance gave me time to think. Then, I could remember being in an office with an oversized desk, crying into someone's shoulder after being informed about my parent's death." I reply.

"I'm really sorry about your parents." He says quietly and I nod my head.

"Thank you. It's strange, I feel like I've already mourned them for a long time already. Something isn't right." I reply. "I'm so sorry about your mom."

"I barely remember her. It's like she stopped existing at some point in my childhood. Do you remember us getting married?" He asks. I shake my head no. "Me either." He adds. "I don't remember anything about our relationship."

"I don't either. I can barely remember us being together." I reply. "Do you remember anything about the war?"

"No. I feel like my life started when I woke up a few days ago. Everything I know is from talking to my father these past few days." He says. "How are you feeling Tris?"

I look up at him sharply and he gives me a strange look. "What did you just call me?" I ask.

"I called you Tris. Sorry, I didn't mean to upset you; I really have no idea why I even called you that." He replies. I notice he rubs the back of his neck nervously, a gesture that seems very familiar to me.

"No, don't apologize, I actually like it. Beatrice seems too formal and stuffy, it doesn't feel like me." I reply.

"Well, with that tattoo I didn't think you were much of a Beatrice myself." He replies with a smile.

I give him a questioning look and he reaches for the neck of my nightgown. I flinch away from his touch and he drops his hand and immediately apologizes.

"I'm sorry for scaring you. I just wanted to show you the tattoo on your collarbone. If you just lower your neckline just a bit, you'll see it." He says, gesturing towards my right side.

I look down on my collarbone and gasp as I see a tattoo of three black ravens in flight. "How do I have a tattoo?" I ask.

"I have no idea, but I do too." He replies. He turns his back to me and lifts his shirt, exposing the intricate patterned tattoo that takes up his entire back. I trace my fingers across the dark lines, noticing the faint scars the tattoo has semi-successfully covered up.

"Why do you have these scars?" I ask quietly.

He drops his shirt back in to place and turns to face me. "I have no idea." He answers. "Are they bad?"

"There are a lot. They look like whip marks. Did someone hurt you?" I ask.

"I wish I knew." He answers in a quiet voice.

"Could you ask your father?" I ask.

"Maybe, but he gets irritated when I ask too many questions. I don't know whether the memory loss just frustrates him, or maybe it's because he's been stuck taking care of us instead of working. Whatever happened during the war caused the faction system to essentially break apart. I don't think he's totally pleased with that." Tobias replies. "I was really surprised that he didn't get angry when you asked him about the war. He's snapped at me each time I've brought it up."

There is a quick knock on the door and I open the door to find a confused looking Marcus standing there.

"Is everything alright?" He asks.

"Yes, it's fine. Tobias and I were just talking. We have a lot to catch up on." I reply with a small smile. Marcus seems pleased with that answer and returns the smile.

"By all means, don't let me interrupt. One of my new colleagues will be stopping by shortly, so we'll be meeting downstairs. I just wanted to let you both know." He states.

"Should we stay up here?" Tobias asks. His father begins to nod.

"It would be best." He replies as he walks out the door, closing it behind him.

"I don't trust him." Tobias whispers as soon as he's heard Marcus' footsteps fade down the staircase.

"Why wouldn't you? He saved us Tobias." I frown.

"All we know is what he tells us. I haven't been outside at all, and the only reason I'm able to stay awake is because I don't take the pills he gives me anymore. He thinks I've been giving you your medication, but I haven't been. I wanted you to be awake too. We don't even know if he's told us anything that is actually real. We have tattoos, which would only come from one place." He explains.

"Dauntless?"

"Exactly. I think we need to go there." He replies.

"Go to Dauntless? Tobias, are you crazy? There's a war going on, and you want us to go into the one faction that may or may not kill us on the spot? We may have been Dauntless at one time, but right now we're not. I think it would be foolish to go in there and demand answers when they very well could be our enemy. They wiped out almost an entire faction. Actually, they destroyed the factions all together. You heard Marcus, they want me and they want that box."

"How do we know we can trust him though? Don't you think we at least need to hear both sides?" He asks.

"Who would we trust in Dauntless Tobias? We don't remember anything or anyone. They tried to kill us!" I reply. "Besides, he's your father Tobias. If we can't trust family, who can we trust?"

"At this point just each other I think. I know you must think I'm insane, but I don't get a good feeling about him or about the situation we're in right now. We don't even remember much about each other, and yet we are married? How would a head injury wipe only parts of our memories? We remember our parents, and certain things are familiar about each other, but nothing about our recent lives? We have tattoos that make it obvious we lived a different life but we have no answers as to what happened, and we have no memories of the life we lived in Dauntless." Tobias stops talking abruptly and reaches out for me. I am extremely lightheaded as he gently lowers me to the bed. "Hey, what's going on? Tris?"

"I feel really dizzy and lightheaded." I reply weakly.

"You need food. I'll be right back." He replies.

"Wait!" I reach out for his arm. "Your father's meeting…"

"I don't care about that. You're my concern." He replies. He leans over and kisses my forehead before leaving the room.

It feels like only a matter of seconds before my heavy eyelids close and I drift off to sleep.

 ** _Flashback_**

" _So what are we doing this time?" I ask the man whose shirtless back is currently facing me as he sits on the tattoo chair. I take some time to appreciate his broad shoulders and the way his muscles move below his skin as he speaks._

 _"That damn symbol." He growls. "I want it gone."_

 _"Removal? You know that's painful and will definitely be multiple sessions." I reply._

 _"No, I want it covered up. I don't care how many sessions it takes, I just want it gone." He replies as he takes a sip from the small bottle of whiskey he had sat on my table. He then hands the bottle to me and I take a grateful sip._

 _"Not so enamored with your home faction anymore?" I tease._

 _"Yeah, something like that. Can you do it?" He asks._

 _"Can I do it? Please! Give me a challenge, why don't you?" I ask and he chuckles. I realize I love the way his laugh sounds. "So, what do you want me to put there?"_

 _"Well Tris, you've gotten to know me pretty damn well these past couple of months. Why don't you surprise me?" He says in his deep voice._

 _"You, fearless leader, want me to put something of my choosing on your body permanently? Have you lost your mind?"_

 _"Yes. You gonna do it, or are you not Dauntless enough Stiff?" He replies as he turns his head to look at me. He has amazing grey eyes, and they are dancing with amusement as he dares me to make my move._

 _"I'm more Dauntless than you'll ever know." I reply as I trace my fingers across the Erudite symbol on his shoulder, watching as they leave a trail of goose bumps in their wake. I see him shiver slightly at my touch._

 _"What's wrong?" I ask with a smirk._

 _"Nothing at all Tris, why would you think there was something wrong?" He smirks back at me._

 _"Well, you're here in my chair, demanding that I tattoo over the symbol of your former faction. It just seems personal, that's all." I reply carefully, knowing how easy it is to scare the youngest leader off._

 _"I am ready for a change. You of all people should be able to relate to that." He replies._

 _"What is that supposed to mean?" I ask._

 _"You've changed. You went from this meek little plain Abnegation girl to a beautiful, fierce Dauntless woman. It's metamorphosis, Tris. You've shed your former self and become who you were truly meant to be." He laments as he takes another swig from the bottle before passing it to me. I can tell he's well on his way to being drunk but I don't care at this moment._

 _"You think I'm beautiful?" I ask._

 _"That's all you got from what I just said to you?" He asks with a smirk._

 _"And fierce." I reply as I lean closer to him. He takes a quick breath in and his expression moves from amusement to almost lust. What on earth am I doing? He's a leader, and an asshole, and more than likely going to kill me as soon as he finds out I'm divergent, yet here I am sharing the same breath as him. I place a hand on his cheek and take a few seconds to really look at him before I grab his jaw and quickly turn his face away from mine. "If I'm going to tattoo you, I need you to stop distracting me. Eyes forward soldier." I command and he laughs._

 _I vow right then to make him laugh more often. Soon, the room is filled with the sound of my tattoo gun and our easy conversation, our words flowing as effortlessly as the whiskey down our throats._

 _"You're probably back there tattooing a fucking heart on my shoulder." He says with a sigh._

 _"You figured me out. A heart with my name." I reply as I continue working._

 _"You ever been in love?" He asks bluntly._

 _"No. I don't even know what love is." I reply with a sigh._

 _"You mean to tell me you don't love number boy?" He asks._

 _"No, and I don't want to talk about him. What about you? Has my favorite leader ever been in love?"_

 _"I'm your favorite leader?" He replies, and I can hear the smirk in his voice. I press down harder on the gun._ _"Fuck Tris, going right for the jugular tonight huh?" He hedges._

 _"Answer it or I really will tattoo a fucking heart with my name on you." I reply._

 _"Love. I don't know. My thoughts on the whole concept are complicated. Anyone can physically be attracted to someone else, that's easy. I think love would be an attraction to someone's mind, and their heart, and their actual being. Having a physical connection is so simple, but to connect with someone's mind and soul is love."_

 _"Wow." I reply. "That's deep."_

 _"What, you don't think I'm capable of having emotions Tris?" He asks seriously. I can tell he's fully intoxicated by just how far his walls are down._

 _"I think you are capable of so much. I think you are a better person than anyone knows." I reply honestly._

 _ **End Flashback**_

I'm awoken by a hand on my shoulder gently shaking me.

"Hey, are you ok? You were mumbling something in your sleep and you seemed restless." Tobias says.

"I was dreaming." I reply. Tobias hands me a cup of ice water which I gratefully take several sips from. He helps me sit up and then hands me a bowl with some sort of stew in it.

"Eat up. You need to get your energy back." He says.

I lean back against the wall as I begin eating the stew. I notice Tobias has his own bowl, and he sits on the bed next to me as we eat together in silence.

"What was your dream about?" He asks.

"It was strange. I was a tattoo artist working on a Dauntless leader's tattoo." I reply. He stops eating and looks over at me.

"Do you remember any details of the dream?" He asks.

"Um, yes, he wanted a cover up tattoo. He had the symbol for Erudite tattooed on his shoulder, and I made a joke about him not being so enamored with his home faction. We were familiar, really flirty with each other." I can feel the blush creeping up on my cheeks at this admission in front of my husband.

"Tris, it's ok. If this was a memory it'll help us. Please tell me." He prods.

"He called me Tris too." I reply and Tobias' eyes widen. "I think he and I were more than just friends or on our way there perhaps."

"Do you know his name?" He asks.

"I never used it. I called him a leader several times and he jokingly called me a Stiff. He was giving me free reign to tattoo whatever I wanted on him. There was definitely a familiarity there between us." I reply.

"What aren't you telling me?" He asks.

I take a deep breath before continuing. "He asked me if I'd ever been in love and I told him I didn't even know what love was. He also asked me if I loved someone he referred to as 'number boy' and I told him I didn't and that I didn't want to talk about him."

Tobias lets out a deep breath but he betrays no emotions before speaking again. "Would you know him if you saw him again?" He asks.

"I don't know. I saw his back mostly. He did turn to look at me and he had piercing silvery grey eyes. Um, his hair was shorter on the sides than the top. That's all I remember. Oh wait, he had a large tattoo on his ribcage, I just can't remember exactly what it was. I wasn't paying close enough attention."

"No, this is good Tris. This seems like it could be a memory and not a dream." Tobias replies excitedly.

"How is this good?" I ask.

"We can try to find him." He replies.

"How? Even if he's alive, how do we know he's a good person? Besides, I was concentrating more on his back than anything. Am I supposed to waltz into the leadership wing in Dauntless and ask all the leaders to take their shirts off so I can examine their backs?" I scoff.

"Why are you so against this? It's obvious we are Dauntless and yet you're content to sit here in Abnegation and play house?" He asks incredulously.

"The box Tobias, my parents died protecting it. I have to find out what's in it, and your father is willing to help me to do it."

"Ok, I get it. It's fine, but please finish eating. You're weak, and in no shape to do whatever the hell it is he wants you to do to open that box." He replies.

I continue to eat my stew and think more about the dream I had. If it is indeed a memory like Tobias believes it is, how is it that I am married to him when it was obvious that there was something with this Dauntless leader?

"Tobias?"

"Yeah?"

"Do you think we're really married?" I ask.

He stands up and goes over to the desk, opening a drawer and pulling out a piece of paper. He hands it to me and sits back down next to me.

"I asked my father the same thing the first time we talked. He gave me this, he said he'd been holding on to it for safekeeping." He replies.

It's our marriage license, dated almost six months ago. I look at the signatures and feel the tears prickling at my eyes. It's witnessed by my mother and father, and signed into law by none other than my father-in-law himself.

"I wish I could remember this." I say in a tear choked voice. Tobias puts his arm around my shoulders and pulls me closer to him.

"Me too Tris, me too." He whispers.


	25. Chapter 25

Tris POV

I stand under the warm water, letting it wash over me as I watch the steam rise above me. I've already scrubbed my skin until it was bright pink, and washed my hair repeatedly until I finally began to feel clean. I don't know how long it's been since I last showered, but it felt like it took a great deal of effort to scrub the grime from my skin.

I search my memory for anything that can tell me what my life was like before waking up this morning and I can't come up with anything. Tobias is right, it's almost as if we have only the very basic memories and everything else has been supplemented by conversations with his father.

Between the steam and the hot water I'm starting to feel a bit faint again. I've noticed my headache coming back and I lean my head on the cold tiles in an effort to cool off a bit. Even though I'm overheated, I'm not ready to leave the comfort and solitude of the shower. I turn around and press my back onto the tiles, and the conflicting combination of the hot water and the cold of the tiles against my body is strangely soothing. I can feel the telltale signs of lightheadedness coming on and I try to steady myself. I lower myself into the tub and sit down on the floor while allowing the water to continue to wash over me.

 ** _Flashback_**

 _I can feel him inside of me, he's pressing me against the cool wall of the shower as he slowly thrusts into me. Everywhere our bodies touch feels like fire, like some faint electrical current is running through our skin. The small noises he makes are intoxicating and my skin erupts in goosebumps when his warm breath passes over me. There isn't one part of my body that doesn't radiate desire for him. He is kissing my neck and I can feel him drag his tongue slowly up to my ear._

" _Why do you love me?" He whispers in his deep voice that drips with seduction. "Tell me."_

 _I see his broad shoulders and the dark tattoos that crawl up from his collarbones to his neck. I can feel his muscles flexing on his back below the strong grip of my hands and legs around him. His muscular body is holding me firmly against the wall._

 _"Eric...please..." I whine, trying desperately to move my hips._

 _"Just one question. I'll do anything you want." He whispers before kissing the sensitive spot behind my ear. "Why do you love me?"_

 _He leans back slightly and I can see his grey eyes trained on mine. His hair is a mess of wet and messy curls. His strong arms are wrapped around me, and when he shifts his weight I can catch glimpses of a large tattoo of a willow tree crawling along his side, around his rib cage while it's branches cross around his front and back. It's a beautiful piece of art, with great detailing as the tree's leaves and limbs turn into fire and flames._

 _His eyes betray every ounce of emotion he carries, and while the heat of our current situation shows the obvious lust in his eyes, the overwhelming emotion they convey is love. I can feel the depth of his love for me in the way he holds me and in the way he moves against me but most of all in the way he looks at me._

 _"Because you're everything I've ever wanted. You are things I never knew I needed. You are it." I whisper. I've never loved anyone before, but this man is everything to me._ _He kisses me hard and I slip my tongue in his mouth as we fight for dominance. "Baby please give me what I need." I whisper to him as he smiles against my lips._

 _ **End flashback**_

"What the hell?" I whisper to myself. I close my eyes and concentrate on the memory that I just experienced. Eric. He had tattoos on his neck, and silvery grey eyes. He's the leader from the tattoo shop. Even though the memory was of an intimate moment between us I now know that I was in love with him at some point.

I continue to sit in the tub and I push the stopper in so the water will begin to fill. I need the warmth of the water right now. I watch as the water slowly begins to rise around me and find it almost relaxing to watch the way the droplets fall like raindrops in a puddle. I find myself wanting to remember more about Eric and the relationship I had with him. Could I have been having an affair with Eric while married to Tobias? I may not remember much about my life, but cheating on someone I love seems so foreign to me. I can't imagine ever breaking my marriage vows no matter what the situation between Tobias and I may have been before the war.

I turn the shower off when the tub is almost filled and I lean back in the hot water. How do I have absolutely no memory of my own husband? Is it possible that our marriage had already ended before the accident that claimed both of our memories? That's something I'd need to talk to Tobias about, it's a scenario that we didn't talk about when we discussed my memories of a relationship with Eric.

I try to concentrate on the familiar way Eric and I were with each other in my earlier memory of tattooing him. Marcus' warnings ring in my ears and I wonder if this relationship I had with the Dauntless leader was a farce, and that perhaps he was trying to get to me because of the mysterious box that is now in Marcus' possession. I shake my head at the thought, because the memory I just had of Eric and I making love in the shower didn't seem like something either of us were faking. The man loved me, didn't he?

No matter how confusing my small snippets of memories are, there is one thing that stands out to me and that is Eric. He obviously meant a great deal to me, and the fact that memories of him are coming back to me let's me know that there's a good chance that I am still in love with him, no matter what our circumstances are. I need to talk to Tobias, so I pull the stopper from the tub so the water can drain.

I slowly stand up and grab my towel. I dry off partially before wrapping the towel around myself and rushing back to the bedroom. Tobias is sitting at the desk, holding the blue sculpture in his hand as he studies it. He jumps when I close the door behind me and quickly looks away when he sees I'm standing in just a towel.

This is my husband, and even though I have absolutely no memory of loving the man in front of me I can't bring myself to tell him that I just had a memory of making love to someone else. I shift my weight from foot to foot as the tension in the room grows.

"His name is Eric." I say quietly. He snaps his head up and locks his eyes to mine.

"You remembered something." He states.

"Yes, and his name is Eric." I repeat.

"What did you remember?" He asks.

"It doesn't matter, I know his name now. Maybe it will help in some way." I reply as I hug the towel closer to my body.

"Tris, tell me what you remembered." He says softly.

"Tobias, no. Please." I answer as I turn away from him. I hug my arms around myself and fight the tears that are burning my eyes. I hear the creak of the chair as Tobias stands up, and I hear his footsteps coming closer to me. He gently wraps his arms around me and rests his chin on my shoulder.

"Please tell me." He whispers.

I break away from his embrace and I grab my robe and tie it on before dropping the towel from underneath it. I pick some clothes out from the dresser and turn to face Tobias.

"I'm going to get dressed then we can talk." I reply as I walk into the bathroom.

I shut the door behind me and take off my robe before looking into the mirror. I barely recognize the woman staring back at me. I have dark circles under my eyes that are a stark contrast to my pale skin. There are healing bruises all around my throat and jaw, and there are multiple other bruises peppering my body. I study the tattoo of the three ravens on my collarbone and silently wonder what they meant to me.

A wave of dizziness washes over me and I grip the sink hard with my hands and try to gently sink to the tiled floor, but instead I knock the glass that's holding our toothbrushes down to the ground and it shatters. My knees buckle and I hit the ground hard.

 ** _Flashback_**

 _"How'd I get there? What happened to Jeanine?" I ask angrily. The front door opens and I see Eric, walk in with several people I don't recognize._

 _"What the fuck is he doing here?" I yell, jumping up and making at attempt to lunge toward Eric. "He's a fucking traitor, why is he here?" Two men who both look extremely familiar to me work together to restrain me._

 _"I see you're finally awake and I assume no ones filled you in." Eric sneers. "You'd think you'd be a little happier since your life was spared."_

 _ **End flashback**_

"Tris, are you ok? I heard a crash, I'm coming in!" Tobias shouts from behind the closed door before he throws it open. "Fuck, what happened?" I can feel him picking me up and sitting me down in the tub. "I'm going to get you cleaned up." He says softly as he grabs several towels and a clean washcloth. It's then that I notice I'm naked, and I try to cover myself with my arms. Tobias sees my struggle and he lays a towel over me.

"Thank you." I say quietly. I watch as he wets the cloth and begins cleaning the small cuts on my legs and knees.

"What happened?" He asks.

"I keep getting these dizzy spells, and each time its happened I've remembered something." I reply.

"What have you remembered? Who is Eric?" He asks.

"Eric is the Dauntless leader I was tattooing."

"Did you remember something else about him?" He asks as he continues to pull small shards of glass from my cuts.

"Yes. I remembered being in an Abnegation house with men that looked and seemed familiar to me and Eric walked in the door. I lunged at him and called him a traitor." I reply.

"What else?" He asks.

I can feel the heat rising on my face and neck and I silently hope that Tobias doesn't look up. I close my eyes tightly and take a deep breath in, opening my eyes when I exhale. Tobias is staring at me.

"I was in love with him." I finally say. His expression doesn't change.

"Maybe you were with him before me." He offers before continuing to gently clean my wounds. "Maybe the war split the two of you up." He shrugs.

"The war was recent though, so how would you and I be married for six months if he and I only broke up during the war?" I ask.

Tobias looks up at me as he opens and closes his mouth. I can tell he's fighting an internal battle with his thoughts and trying to prevent himself from saying the wrong things.

"Tobias, just say it." I prompt.

"Maybe you were having an affair." He finally says. My mouth gapes at his statement, because it's so similar to the thoughts I was already having. "Tris, I'm not saying these things to hurt you. I'm remembering things too, just bits and pieces though." He stops talking suddenly.

"What did you remember?" I ask.

I watch him carefully as he drops his eyes to the floor. His Adam's apple moves as he swallows nervously and he begins fidgeting with his hands as if he's not sure what to do with them. I grab one of his hands and squeeze it. "Tell me." I prompt.

"I've had some really scrambled memories of my mother, but not from when I was a kid. I've seen her as an adult, and apparently she wanted me to find you for some reason." He begins before removing his hand from mine and busying himself by continuing to look for glass shards in my cuts. "At some point I was shackled and chained like a prisoner in a room with you and who I assume now is this Eric person that you're remembering, and I ask you if you're sleeping with him and you tell me you are. I also ask you how you feel about me and you tell me you feel nothing for me. Tris, I did something to hurt you. I don't know what it is yet, but I see bits and pieces every time I close my eyes."

I now wonder if our marriage was indeed over before the accident that claimed our memories. Since some of Tobias' memories of me seem to indicate that he and I were not together, and that he had somehow hurt me it makes more sense that whatever he and I may have had was over and I began something new with Eric.

"Do you get dizzy before you experience a flashback or a memory?" I ask and he nods. "Why didn't you tell me?" I ask.

"I didn't want you to be afraid of me." He replies. "He tosses the washcloth into a hamper. "You're done, I got all the glass and there's nothing too deep. No stitches needed."

"Thank you." I whisper as he gently lifts me from the tub. He takes me back to the bedroom and helps me into my robe before he lays me down on the bed. He kisses my forehead and makes a move to leave but I grab his hand. "Lay with me, please."

He crawls into the bed behind me and wraps his arms around me. The familiarity of this causes my mind to race. I close my eyes and can remember laying in a bed exactly like this, with strong arms wrapped around me, arms with maze tattoos.

"You're shivering, are you cold?" He asks quietly.

"No. I just remember laying like this before." I reply.

"With him." He says softly.

"Tobias, I'm sorry. I don't know who he is to me. You and I are married, and I keep having flashbacks of a previous relationship." I reply.

He tightens his arms around me and buries his face in the back of my neck. "Tris, they are just memories and I'm glad we're both remembering things. I know our past isn't perfect just from the little things I've remembered. I also know that whoever this Eric is someone important to you."

"I feel like I'm being disloyal to our marriage." I reply weakly.

"Tris, do you love me?" He asks in a soft voice. I don't answer, because honestly I have no idea what to say. I feel like I am deeply in love, but not with him, and even though I keep having memories of the Dauntless leader Eric I'm not sure what his place is in my life anymore. I start to feel dizzy so I close my eyes and bring my hands up to my head. Tobias is speaking, but he sounds so far away.

 ** _Flashback_**

" _Eric, do you remember when we decided to make our relationship official?" I ask. We're sitting side by side on a small bed in a windowless room. Everything around us is stark in black and white. I remember this room, it's inside of Candor._

 _"Yeah, it was right here in this room. I'll never forget that day." He replies with a small grin._

 _"So we made a decision that when we opened that door and faced the real world again that there would be no doubts about what we were to each other. I want that again." I retort._

 _"Ok." He grins at me. I remember having a conversation like this with him before and I grin back at him._

 _"Just ok, huh? What does that mean Eric?" I smile seductively at him and move so that I'm straddling his lap. He winds his arms around me and I can feel him tugging gently on the ends of my long hair._

 _"I think it means that maybe we're engaged..." He says softly before pressing his lips to mine in a gentle kiss._

 _"Are you asking or telling?" I ask against his lips. I can feel him smile slightly before he leans back and looks at me. The way he watches me is mesmerizing and I realize just how much I crave him. He's complicated and complex, riddled with self doubt and a bit of self loathing and he is extremely possessive of what's his which matches his competitive nature._ _He has personality flaws, as do I, but he's still the best person I've ever known. We each spent months of our life wanting the other, falling in love from afar and running as far away from our true feelings as we could. I don't want to deny the magnitude of what I feel for him anymore and I certainly don't want a life without this amazing man by my side._

 _"Will you marry me Tris?" He asks. He's not overly romantic, or one for grand gestures. The simplicity of his proposal in a room where we've shared something special before is perfect._

 _"Yes." I reply before crashing my lips into his and kissing him deeply._

 _ **End flashback**_

"Hey, it's ok Tris, there you are. It was just a memory, you're ok." Tobias soothes as the slight tremors I'm feeling begin to subside. "What did you remember?" He asks.

"Tobias..." I begin, but I'm at a loss for words.

"Whatever it is you can tell me, even if it's something terrible. Working together through our memories is key to getting our lives back Tris. It's obvious that your place isn't here with me. Please tell me." He prods.

"Eric." I begin with a voice that cracks slightly from emotions I'm unsure how to deal with.

"Go on..." Tobias replies.

"We were at Candor for some reason, in one of their guest rooms I think. He asked me to marry him and I said yes." I choke out. Tobias wraps his arms around me tightly and for the first time since waking up I cry. He says nothing, instead just soothing me with his touch and holding me close to his chest until I can gather my wits. He surprises me when he begins speaking.

"Tris, if I'm being honest I can say that I don't remember loving you. I'm obviously attracted to you, and I feel like we have a bond, but it's like our lives started over the day we both woke up. I'm not upset at you for not loving me. We barely know each other, and we've been forced into this situation together. I truly believe at some point in my life I did love you, whether it be as a lover or as a friend but I can't remember it. Does that make me a terrible person?" He asks.

"Not at all. I don't know what our past consists of, but I do know with certainty that you are not a terrible person." I reply with a yawn.

"Sleep Tris. I'll stay here with you."

"Thank you Tobias." I murmur as I drift off to sleep.

 ** _Flashback_**

 _"Beatrice, you know who I am?" He asks._

 _"My brother." I say, as I start crying into his shoulder._

 _"Could I have a moment alone with my sister?" Caleb asks and I hear footsteps and the door closing. I look up and we're alone._

 _"Caleb what's happening to me?" I ask. He guides me to the cot and we sit together._

 _"Bea, do you know how you got here?" He asks. I shake my head no. "Do you know who those two men are?" He asks, gesturing towards the hall._

 _"The one who said his name is Eric. I dream of him all the time. I remember his eyes. I can't tell what's real with him. Why does he consume me?"_

 _"What do you remember about me?" He asks._

 _"Caleb, why are you asking me that? You're my brother. I remember everything about you. Who are the other two men to me?"_

 _ **End flashback**_

I wake up with a start, and I feel Tobias' arms tighten around me as he murmurs something in his sleep. I turn over to face him and notice how young and peaceful he looks while he's sleeping. I think about everything I've remembered so far today: I have a brother named Caleb, and it's obvious from the interaction I'd had with him that something has happened before to make me forget who Eric is. I can't seem to stop thinking about Eric, he consumes my thoughts now just like he seems to have back then. Why did I lose my memory? Why has it seemingly happened more than once?

Before I know it I feel myself drifting back to sleep.

 ** _Flashback_**

 _"How good are you at hopping a train?" I ask the blonde haired man next to me._

 _"Please. Give me a real challenge." He answers with a smirk. We see the train approaching and I start to run, glancing at my companion as he takes off running beside me. We jump onto the train with ease and sit back against the wall of the empty car, watching the city fly past the open doors. I glance over at him and he seems lost in thought._

 _"Do you feel ok?" He finally asks._

 _"Yes, I actually do. You saved me, didn't you?" I ask and he looks away. I reach out to touch his cheek and feel the moisture on it. "Look at me, please." He turns back to face me. "Thank you."_

 _I reach for him and we hold on to each other tightly. The familiar feeling of safety warms me, and I squeeze my brother a little._

 _"You're the only family I have left." He whispers and I bury my face in his shoulder, breathing in his scent. We cling to each other until it's time to jump off the train._

 _ **End flashback**_

I feel someone gently shaking me as I blink my eyes rapidly. I try to focus on the person who is leaning over me.

"Tris, wake up. It's ok." He says in a soft voice. "It was just a dream."

"I have brothers." I whisper.

"What did you say?" He asks sharply.

"Brothers. I have brothers." I say again a bit louder.

"What did you remember?" He asks. I finally can focus in the dark shadows of the room and see it's Marcus talking to me.

"I have two brothers. Caleb is one of their names. Where are they?" I ask.

"What did you remember about them?" He asks.

"Apparently I've had memory issues before, and I remembered a moment with Caleb where we are discussing it. I also remembered a moment with my other brother where we jump onto a train and while we're riding it to our destination I thank him for saving my life. What do you think it means?" I reply.

Marcus looks pensive and his expression is hard. He furrows his eyebrows and trains his intense navy blue eyes on me.

"What else have you remembered Beatrice?" He asks in a gentle voice that doesn't match the look on his face.

"Where's Tobias?" I ask with a bit of apprehension creeping in.

"He's just downstairs making us some dinner. I heard you talking in your sleep and found you tossing and turning. Beatrice, my dear, what else have you remembered?" Marcus asks. The gentle tone of voice is back along with the soft look on his face. He looks so kind and concerned about me.

"I have many memories of a Dauntless leader whose name is Eric." I reply finally.

His soft expression doesn't change in the slightest. He sits on the edge of the bed and angles himself towards me. "What do you remember about this leader Beatrice?" He asks.

I contemplate my answer. Tobias is sure we can't trust his father, but I have no memories of Marcus that tell me I shouldn't. Our scattered memories don't speak of a perfect friendship or relationship between Tobias and me, instead they point towards some sort of strife. With both of us having such incomplete memories of our pasts, it could take months or even years to put together the shattered pieces of our lives. I look at Marcus and think my best bet is to share some of my memories with him in an effort to rebuild my life.

"We had a relationship and were deeply connected. We were in love." I admit slowly. "We were engaged to be married."

"I see. This Eric must be someone you were involved with before my son." He answers carefully.

"I don't think that's the case. I still feel that I am in love with Eric. No matter how hard I try I can't remember ever loving Tobias." I admit. "Marcus, is it possible that the marriage between Tobias and I had already ended? I don't feel any type of connection with him, other than friendship, but I feel like I am still deeply in love with Eric."

Marcus stands up and walks over to the lone window in the bedroom. He picks up the glass sculpture and looks at it briefly before setting it back down.

"If you are so in love with this Eric person then why are you here with Tobias and me? Why did I find you with Tobias and not Eric? Where was Eric when you were fighting for your life in the hospital? Where has Eric been these past several weeks while you recovered here?" Marcus asks. There's a slight hint of anger in his voice, but his face is serene.

"Do you know Eric?" I ask.

"Indeed I do." Marcus answers with a smirk.

"Can you tell me about him?" I ask hesitantly.

Marcus stares at me and seems to be contemplating his answer. He finally begins to speak. "He's the only surviving leader of Dauntless. He's been after the box I showed you earlier for months, and he's not going to stop until he gets it. He won't hesitate to kill you to get what he wants." Marcus warns.

I think about what Marcus has told me and realize it doesn't make sense. "If I am believed to be the only person who can open that box, why would Eric kill me in order to get it?" I ask.

"To destroy it so no one ever knows what's inside." He replies simply.

"Eric loves me." I reply without masking the frustration I'm feeling. "Marcus, I feel like I had an entirely different life before. I have brothers, and I have a fiancé that isn't Tobias. Do you think there's any way I could at least talk to this Eric? Maybe he could help answer the questions you're unable to answer for us."

Marcus expression softens and surprisingly he appears to be deep in thought. For a moment I'm relieved, thinking that even if the past that Eric and I shared isn't pretty, it'd still be helpful to talk to him about it. He could be the one person who can fill the large gaps in my memory.

"Jeanine was right about you Beatrice, the way your mind works is quite extraordinary. No matter what serum you're given, you find a way to fight your way through it. It's quite a feat, and I know it's going to serve us well when we begin working on that box later. However, I need your mind to be a clean slate. You see, I need to ensure that your only focus is on our little family here. Your loving husband, your dear father in law and with any luck one day you'll give me some grandchildren to spoil. That just can't happen while you're still dreaming of a life with Eric Coulter. I'm sorry my dear, but it's time that you graduate to the final memory serum. Jeanine never had great success with it, but she never got the chance to use it on you because your dear fiancé killed her. We can't let that happen again." He replies and he quickly sticks a needle in to the side of my neck.

"What are you doing...?" I croak. I can feel the serum burning inside of me. I claw at my neck and sink down to the ground. "Why...?" I gasp.

Marcus watches me with an unreadable look. I try to speak but the sounds that are coming out of my mouth are gibberish and I'm unable to form any words. Marcus crouches before me and places a cool hand on my sweaty cheek.

"Don't fight it. It only makes it that much worse." He croons sweetly.

I have no time to react before everything goes black.


	26. Chapter 26

Eric POV

"Hey are you in there?" Shauna asks as she snaps her fingers in front of my face. "Have you heard anything we've said?"

"Yeah. The cameras are still not working properly. Tris is still gone. Four is still gone. No one has a fucking clue as to where they are. What else?" I growl.

"We have to help rebuild the factions Eric. Amity and Candor are basically doing it on their own. No ones dared go into Abnegation, except when they did the mass cremation of the bodies. We have no idea what's in store for us there." Tori says.

"Johanna and Jack have it under control." I reply.

"Eric, it's not that simple. We are Dauntless, they look to us for protection, even more so with the cameras down. We've sent in troops, but leadership needs to be present. _All_ of leadership. You can't keep taking off with Edgar on a whim." Shauna adds.

"It's not a fucking whim. _Tris is gone!_ What aren't you understanding here? It's been sixteen fucking days and she's disappeared into thin air. Four has been gone for thirteen of those days too. This isn't strange to any of you?" I ask.

"Eric, I think you need to face the reality of the situation." Zeke says cautiously.

"Do enlighten me Zeke, what is the reality?" I sneer.

"They may have planned this. The cameras, Four disappearing while out in the field trying to fix the cameras. You two were on shaky ground back in Candor. What if they planned on leaving so they could be together?" Zeke asks.

"Eric, no one is trying to twist a knife here. Shit happens, and they could have done things this way to avoid a confrontation with you." Bud adds. He's been acting as a leader in Tris' absence, and while I've appreciated his unwavering support it appears that I'm the only one in the room who doesn't believe Tris left me to be with Four.

"She's my fiancée. She didn't leave me willingly. I was talking to her brother to get his fucking blessing to marry her when she disappeared. You guys don't understand, literally minutes before Tori came to find us for the deliberations about Evelyn Tris had agreed to become my wife. I'm telling you, she didn't leave me. She promised me she'd never do that again. Wherever she is, it's against her will." I reply.

"You two are engaged?" Tori asks.

"Yeah. Made it official in Candor. Do you understand now why I refuse to believe she left me? Tori, you never gave up on Bud, you told me that yourself. Why would I give up on Tris?" I ask.

"He's right. Zeke, Shauna I think you two should be in charge of working with the other leaders to provide help with rebuilding the factions. Bud and I will split time between that and helping Eric to find Tris and Four. Eric, we can't spare many hands, but who do you need on your team?" Tori asks.

"Edgar, Edward and Peter. You can take everyone else and appoint them as you see fit." I reply.

"Fair enough. Good luck Eric." Zeke replies. I nod to the other man before leaving the room and heading to Peter and Edgar's shared apartment. I let myself in through the unlocked door and find Edgar poring over a map of the city, while Edward and Peter look on.

"Today we go to Abnegation." I announce. I'm met with the shocked faces of all three men. Peter is the one who finally breaks the awkward silence.

"I don't know if that's a good idea. Stiffland is pretty fucked up, and we have no idea how much live ammo and bombs are still booby trapped around that place. The last time anyone dared to go in they lost their fucking foot when they stepped on a homemade land mine. The factionless fucked that place all up." Peter remarks.

"It's the only place we haven't gone." Edgar replies.

"No one goes there. Why would Tris and Four be dumb enough to hole up in a danger zone?" Peter asks.

"Because they're not someplace of their own free will." Edward replies. The realization on Peter's face is immediate.

"Point taken. Eric, you're like a brother, so if you say we're going to Abnegation, I'm with you." Peter says.

"Same here." Edward adds.

"You _are_ my brother. Where you go, I follow." Edgar says.

"Alright. Let's get geared up and get the fuck out of here." I say as I head towards the door. The four of us make our way to the ammo room where we equip bulletproof vests and helmets, and grab rifles, pistols, hand to hand weapons and plenty of ammo. We each get communication devices and test them and I'm startled when the door opens and Christina walks in.

"I'm tired of you leaving me behind. She's my best friend, I'm going." She says resolutely.

"Chris, it's dangerous." Peter begins.

"I. Don't. Care." She replies, emphasizing each word.

"Get geared up. We're going into Abnegation." I reply.

Christina pauses briefly then gathers herself and begins putting on her gear. "What's the plan?" She asks.

"Find Tris and Four without dying." Edward answers.

"Seriously, you don't have a plan?" She asks. "No one goes in there. We still haven't swept it for bombs. We can't just waltz in there without some sort of plan."

"Does anyone know where she lived?" Peter asks.

"I do." I reply.

"Ok then, now we're starting to think logically." Christina replies as she tests her communication device. "I'm ready."

We head out to the tracks and wait for the next train. We're soon joined by Will and Lynn.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?" Lynn asks angrily. Edward walks over to his girlfriend and kisses her temple. "Seriously, you all were going to just take off and go into the most dangerous place leftover from the war and you weren't even going to tell us?"

"From the way you're both dressed it appears you are coming with us." Christina replies.

"Damn right we are." Will replies. "This team fought way too hard to keep her alive just to let something happen to her."

Once we've jumped on the train I look around at the small team we've put together and hope that we will be able to keep each other alive. Abnegation was ravaged by the war and subsequent uprising, and even I have to admit I'm nervous about going back there.

"Everyone listen up. Abnegation isn't what it used to be, and for those of you who haven't seen it post Evelyn it can be extremely dangerous. There was a lot of live ammo left during the war that the factionless used to their full advantage. There are homemade bombs, booby traps and the occasional homemade landmine as well. We haven't had a sweep of the area as of yet, and we could very well be walking into our own deaths because none of us have any idea if there are still rebel factionless living there. We will split up in two teams of two and one team of three, and it's imperative that we keep our communication open. If anyone is compromised, we need a code word for it, as well as another code word if we find Tris or Four." I explain.

"Birdie for Tris, Blade for Four, and the danger word is Chasm." Christina offers and we all nod in agreement.

We disembark from the train and take a brief moment to gather ourselves. We quickly break off into pairs, with Will and Chris heading west, Peter, Lynn and Edward heading east and Edgar and I heading north.

"Be careful, be hyper aware of your surroundings and for fucks sake don't go and do anything stupid like getting yourself killed, ok?" I command and get affirmations from everyone. We go our separate ways, and Edgar and I begrudgingly begin the trek towards the dangerous northern area.

Abnegation looks as bad as we expected, it's empty and desolate. The many grey buildings have an abandoned aura about them; the numerous houses we've already checked out are almost identical in furnishings. It's eerily quiet, and every step we take echoes along the grey stone walls.

"I can't believe Tris grew up here. It's creepy as hell." Edgar whispers. "Every fucking house is exactly the same.

"It wasn't always like this, but I agree. There's something strange about living this way. They viewed everything as indulgent, even down to the food they would eat." I reply in a low voice.

"Do you know which house was hers?" He asks.

"I do, but it was practically gutted during the war. There was something inside her house that Jeanine was looking for. Caleb took me to their house right after we had rescued Tris from Erudite; we had thought that bringing her somewhere that was familiar would help with her memory loss. The house was inhabitable. " I reply.

"We should still check it out. If Tris did happen to make it back here there's a good chance she'd have gone there, even if it were just to gather supplies." Edgar replies.

"It's certainly worth a shot." I agree as we walk out of the house we just finished checking.

I lead the way towards Tris' childhood home but there is a flash of light that keeps catching my eye and I put a hand on Edgar's arm to stop him from moving. He gives me a quizzical look and I nod my head toward the window where the sunlight is glinting off of an unknown moving object. We watch the window carefully and based on the movement of the object it's obvious someone is moving it to signal us.

"Someone's in there." I whisper. Edgar nods in agreement.

"It could be a trap. Factionless are notorious for doing things like that to attract the guards into the abandoned houses so they can rob them. I've even seen some kidnapped and held until they receive food and goods in exchange." Edgar replies in a low voice.

"Dammit. I need to know who it is. It's the first sign of life we've seen since we got here." I growl.

We both sit against the wall and continue to watch the window. Eventually the curtain is drawn back slightly and we can see someone peeking out.

"Whoever is in there is looking at us." Edgar says quietly.

"I'm going in." I say as I move to stand. Edgar pulls me back down by my arm roughly.

"No, we draw whoever it is out here. We have no idea how many of them are inside, and what weapons they may have. I know you're my leader and all, but right now you're going to have to trust me." Edgar says firmly. "Give me your watch."

I take off my watch and hand it over to Edgar. "I'll cover you." I say quietly. He nods and steps away from the building and into the direct sunlight, angling the face of the watch to reflect back towards the person in the house. This catches their attention, and instead of simply peeking through a slit in the curtain the person draws the curtain back completely.

"Oh shit." Edgar murmurs. I move closer to him and look in the window; I'm shocked to see Four looking back at me. I wave my hand in a gesture for him to come outside. He nods once and closes the curtain.

Edgar and I back up towards the neighboring house, leaning against the grey stone wall as we watch Four cautiously approach us. He's showing us his hands, and the nervousness he's projecting is sincere.

"I'm unarmed." He calls out.

"Hands on your head." Edgar barks as he frisks him. Once he is done he looks back at me. "He's clean."

"What did you do to Tris?" I hiss.

"You know her." He replies.

"Of course we know her, what the hell did you do to her?" I shout as Edgar places his hand on my arm in an effort to calm me.

"Nothing, I swear. I don't have too long, he'll likely be back within a couple of hours. We need help." Four quickly says. "My name is Tobias Eaton, although you may already know me but I have no idea who you are. We need help." He repeats nervously.

Edgar and I share a look before Edgar begins to speak. "Who's coming back?"

"My father." He says. "Who are you? You know me, don't you? How do we know each other?" He asks.

"Yeah. I'm Edgar and this is Eric." Edgar replies as he gestures towards me. Four quickly jerks his head in my direction.

"You're Eric. Are you a leader of Dauntless?" Four asks me.

"How do you know that?" I ask. "You just told us you didn't know who we are."

"I don't, but my wife had these memories of you all the time." He replies.

"Your wife? Who is your wife?" I ask.

"Beatrice Prior, or maybe Eaton now." He replies. Before I can even think, I lunge towards him.

"What the fuck did you do to her? Did you trick her into marrying you Four?" I yell as Edgar strains to hold me back and Four cowers in fear.

"What did you just call me?" Four asks in a small voice.

"I called you Four!" I shout. "It's your fucking name, as ridiculous as it is it's what you call yourself number boy. What kind of scam are you trying to run on us?"

"Number boy." He says slowly and quietly.

"Jesus Christ Four you'd better start making some sense right fucking now or I am going to put a long overdue bullet between your eyes." I yell.

"She told me about you, specifically a memory of you calling someone 'number boy' during a conversation the two of you had." Four offers.

"Oh my god, he wiped her again?" I ask. Edgar snaps his head in my direction.

"Wiped?" Four asks with a strange look on his face.

"Did Marcus drug her? Did he drug you? It could have been an injection or even something put into your food or drink." Edgar asks.

"He's given us something, I'm sure of it. I believe he's drugged both of us with something to erase our memories. At first, we didn't realize it because he told us we'd been seriously injured in a war and were on the brink of death. Tris started having flashbacks, of you Eric, and some sort of life or relationship that the two of you shared when she was a tattoo artist in Dauntless. She also had some memories of being in love with you at some point. Her memories were scrambled; they sometimes came in the form of dreams too." He replies.

"Why is everything past tense when it comes to Tris?" Edgar asks.

"She made a mistake and trusted Marcus." Four replies as he's shaking his head. "I'd been telling her he couldn't be trusted, and that I had a bad feeling about him but she wouldn't listen. She told him everything she remembered about her two brothers and about you specifically Eric. He dosed her with something really bad. She didn't even remember who she is; she has these terrible night terrors that she wakes up screaming and clawing at herself or me. The worst part is I think the terrors are mostly of you." Four gestures towards me. "She has absolutely no idea who you are, but she's described you in vivid detail to me after some of the more violent nightmares and I can tell by that tattoo on your neck and the physical description she gives me that it's you."

"She's had that before, they did this to her before." I murmur. Four raises his eyebrows and Edgar looks at me with concern.

"What do you mean?" Edgar asks.

"Jeanine, she dosed her with something before we were able to get her out of Erudite. Tris went from having partial memories of her life in Dauntless to not knowing anyone. She went from trusting me to being terrified of me." I reply.

"This is something different than what he's given me. I have a lot of gaps in my memories and a ton of blank spots, but I at least have some knowledge as to who I am. Tris is completely blank." Four explains. "I think Marcus is planting memories in her mind. When she is more coherent we do talk but I can tell she's putting a lot of trust into Marcus."

"How many times has she been wiped, Four? Whatever he's dosed her with, how much, how many times?" I ask.

"If my theory is correct he dosed both of us at some point before we woke up here, neither of could remember much about our lives before waking up that morning. He's given her at least one more dose, and I overheard him talking to someone about it being untested and unproven. If he's given her more, it's without my knowledge." He replies.

"Where is she now?" Edgar asks.

"She's with Marcus, just like she is every day. They spend hours away from the house and every time they come back home she's catatonic. I've tried to stop whatever is going on but he just keeps me here under lock and key. Usually one of his associates is here watching me, but today they've left me alone. I've been working on gaining his trust." Four replies.

"Does she trust you?" I ask.

"She does." Four answers with a nod.

"Do you have any memories from your past Tobias?" Edgar asks.

"Barely, I do have moments of flashbacks and I do have some dreams that I think are memories, but things are scrambled. I remember my father, but have almost no real memories of him from my childhood. I thought it was really strange, but I now think it's because he managed to find a way to almost condition me to remember him. Tris remembered her parents before this last dose. She had memories of her two brothers, but mostly everything she remembered was of you." He says looking at me.

"You called her your wife. How…?" I ask, not knowing how to finish the thought.

"Marcus told us we were married. I didn't believe it, but there's a marriage license that he has that neither Tris nor I can remember. According to the license we were married almost seven months ago. The timeline isn't making sense though, because Tris' memories of you were when she was supposedly married to me. At first we believed that maybe she was having an affair." He replies carefully.

"Absolutely not, there's no way she is married to you." I reply angrily.

"How do you know this? You seem very confident in your knowledge." Four replies. I'm quite surprised to see that he is calm. The Four I know would be livid with me questioning anything he said.

"You betrayed her trust." I reply.

"How did I betray her? I have had memories myself and I know by some of the bits and pieces I've put together that I hurt her at some point. One of my memories is of the three of us in a room where I am chained to the floor. I ask her how she feels about me and she tells me she feels nothing for me." He replies. "What did I do to her?"

I'm not sure how to answer him. On one hand, I can't stand the man and I want him to suffer for as long as possible for what he did to Tris. On the other hand, he's who is protecting her as much as he possibly can from his monster of a father.

"I don't want to interfere with your memories, but I will give you an extremely short version of a very long story. The two of you were together, and you began sneaking off to visit with your mother, who was factionless. Your mother had convinced you to join her cause, and as a result you were given a mind control implant and used against your will to hurt both Tris and her parents during the war. You killed her parents while you were under a simulation, and it was a long road for her to get to the point where she could forgive you. You helped save her from your mother and Tris' other brother Caleb during the uprising that followed the war and your actions helped you regain her trust." I reply.

Four doesn't say anything but we can tell from the look on his face that he is having a hard time digesting what I've just told him.

"Why does your father want her?" Edgar asks.

"There's this box that her parents were hiding in their house. Apparently an Erudite leader named Jeanine Matthews was after it, but Marcus somehow ended up with it. He believes it contains information on what's outside the wall, and he also says only Tris can open it because she's the only known divergent who has an aptitude for all five factions." He replies. "It's also my belief that Marcus wants us to think we are married, and that I can exercise some sort of control over Tris as her husband." He replies.

"First Jeanine, then Evelyn and now Marcus..." Edgar begins as he slowly shakes his head. "This box...?" He looks at me for answers.

"I never knew about the box specifically, but I did know that from the moment Tris transferred to Dauntless Jeanine was obsessed with her and her divergence. Jeanine had been trying for years, unsuccessfully, to get Tris out of Abnegation. Although Marcus and Jeanine were supposed allies, he made it impossible for Jeanine to extract Tris from Abnegation before Tris' brain could fully mature. No one ever suspected Tris would actually leave Abnegation, and once she did I was tasked with bringing her to Jeanine." I reply.

"You were going to bring her to Erudite?" Edgar asks angrily.

"No. I will freely admit that when Jeanine and Max first brought me into their circle of trust and shared their war plans with me I was intrigued, especially since it was to overthrow Abnegation. This faction is fucking warped, and I had no real issues with getting the heart of the government away from them. Her obsession with Divergents was unreal, and her attitude to treat them like disposable experiments sickened me. I turned from her because she didn't just want to re-appropriate the government, she wanted genocide."

"There will always be someone coming after her, won't there?" Edgar asks me.

"Yes." I agree, saying it out loud for the first time. "There's not another known divergent like her. She's an anomaly, completely one of a kind. Jeanine spotted it before Tris was even tested. Marcus will die for his crimes, by my hand preferably, but I can't guarantee there's not another one just like him out there who will come after her once we let our guard down."

"She thinks that you are after her too." Four quietly replies.

"I've had to earn her trust more times than I can even count. I'll do it again." I reply. I don't quite believe my own words but I can't and won't ever give up on Tris.

He looks up at me before speaking again. "Who is she to you?"

"She's my fiancée. The same day she disappeared she had agreed to be my wife. I promised to get her a ring, and get on one knee and do it the right way. I've been carrying a ring for her every day since." I reply quietly. I watch as Four takes a deep breath before turning to Edgar.

"And you?" Four asks.

"Tris is my sister." Edgar replies.

"How do we get you both out of here? What is our best option?" I ask.

"It would have to be at night. Tris and I go to bed rather early, but her night terrors prevent her from getting much sleep. It's usually just the three of us in the house, and Tris and I are always in the room you saw me in earlier." Four replies.

"You sleep in the same bed?" I ask without thinking.

"Yes, she can't sleep without being held. We've done nothing Eric. I've known since she started having her first memories of you that her heart belongs to you. I feel protective of her, but I don't love her." He replies.

Suddenly our communication device goes off and Edward's voice fills my ear.

"We have eyes on Birdie." He says quietly. "Do you copy?"

"What's your location?" I ask quickly. Edgar begins pacing around us and Four appears to be confused.

"Abandoned warehouse, closest to the remains of the center where they fed the factionless." Edward replies in a low voice.

"We have Blade. We will head your way." I reply.

"Ditto." Will's response comes quickly.

I look at Four and he looks terrified, even when I think back to our initiate days I can't remember ever seeing fear in the other man. I grab a pistol from my ankle holster and hand it to him along with two throwing knives. Edgar hands him some ammo and one of his many spare pistols as well.

"You may not remember it, but you are a deadly accurate shot. Don't overthink it." I say as I peel off one of my layers of Kevlar and hand it to Four. "It's not much, but it will help to protect you. Take your shirt off and put this on." I command. Four nervously does as he's told, and he pauses as Edgar passes him an additional layer.

"I don't want to put either of you in danger by taking these." Four says. I put up a hand to stop him.

"Four, you are fucking Dauntless, act like it. I don't give two shits what your asshole father has been pumping you full of, you are _not_ Abnegation. Edgar and I both still have vests, we will be fine. Gear up and let's move." I command and Four does as he's told.

We begin to move and I place Four behind Edgar while I trail behind them both. Edgar moves and thinks like a trained soldier, it's obvious his years serving Evelyn have disciplined him well. He will be an asset to Dauntless once the faction is rebuilt. We slowly make our way to the warehouse Edward and Lynn are in, and they verbally guide us to the room they currently have Marcus and Tris under surveillance.

"Where is she?" I ask and Lynn hands me her binoculars. Edward guides me to a broken window and angles me in a way where I can see without being seen. I see a grey building in front of us, smaller than some of the community buildings but larger than the typical Abnegation house. "I don't see anything." I whisper.

"Keep watching." Edward whispers back. I'm aware of someone pressed against my side and find Christina beside me.

We watch the window for what seems like hours, but in reality less than twenty minutes pass before we see Marcus helping a clearly drugged Tris stand up. I immediately tense, and Christina presses her hand flat against my back and rubs circles in an effort to calm me.

"Have you seen anyone besides the two of them?" I ask.

"Negative. We thought he was there alone for the longest time." Lynn whispers. I continue watching as Marcus attaches a lead to Tris before disappearing out of site. I can see Tris lying on a bed and while she appears to be catatonic her body continues to writhe as if she's in pain. I turn away to address the team.

"We need to get into position. When they leave that building we take him. Don't fire on him unless absolutely necessary, and only if it doesn't endanger Tris." I command. "I need my best snipers inside this building, that means Peter, Edward, Lynn, Chris and Will you need to find places like this room where you can see but not be seen. Edgar and Four, you're both with me."

"Wait!" Will calls out. He takes his vest and helmet off and hands both to Four. "You will need this more than me."

Four takes the offered items and looks back at Will. "We were friends before all of this?"

Will's face twists in confusion and I try to explain the situation.

"He's been wiped, so has Tris. She's much farther gone than he is. Keep that in mind when we get her." I reply and then turn my attention to Chris. "This is like the aftermath of the Erudite rescue all over again. Be prepared." I say and she nods in affirmation.

"She's a total wipe?" Peter asks with shock evident on his face.

"Yes, and it sounds like it may have been the final stage serum." I reply as the realization sets in with everyone in the room. The words weren't spoken, but the message is clear: we may never have Tris fully back with us. "Let's get into position."

Four shakes Will's hand before putting on the vest and helmet. I watch as he deftly tightens the straps like he has hundreds of times before. His memory may be fucked, but the soldier in him will never die.

"Any final words of wisdom fearless leader?" Peter asks and a memory of Tris calling me that hits me like a slap in the face. I quickly compose myself before speaking.

"Don't do anything stupid..." I begin.

"Like getting yourself killed." Four finishes for me and I look at him with my mouth hanging open. He gives me the briefest of smiles before he steels his fears and emotions behind the expression I've grown used to seeing in the almost three years I've known him.

During initiation, before Dalia was murdered and before the rumors ruined my reputation Four and I were a force to be reckoned with. Before any war game or team building exercise Amar would force the two of us to partner on we would say the exact words we just did, always finishing each other's sentence depending on who spoke first. Somewhere deep inside of his mind he's remembering our early friendship. I shake away the memory as we all separate to take our positions and wait for Marcus to exit the building.


	27. Chapter 27

Eric POV

The lights in the room where Marcus and Tris are finally go out and the only thing I can hear is the pounding of my heart in my own ears. I glance over at Edgar and he is standing strong like he's been a Dauntless soldier his whole life. Four is crouched down beside me, watching the building's entrance through the scope of his rifle.

"We have eyes on the prize." Peter's low voice rings through our communications device.

"He's coming out in three, two..."

Complete chaos erupts as the door opens and a very surprised Marcus is face to face with a rifle. Edgar stands in front of him prepared to shoot as I shout for Marcus to lie down.

"Put your fucking hands where I can see them!" I yell as he reluctantly lifts both hands above his head. "Get down!"

"I'm unarmed. Please." Marcus pleads as he lowers to his knees and I rush to frisk him. Four slowly approaches a completely terrified Tris, who's catatonic state is only interrupted by the sound of her hyperventilating.

"Is she ok Four?" I yell as Edgar helps me to cuff Marcus and push him face down to the ground. "Tobias! Fucking talk to me, is she ok?"

"You're scaring her, calm down man." Four calls out. The rest of our team has joined us and they surround Marcus. When I am satisfied that he is sufficiently guarded, I walk over to where Four is comforting Tris.

"No, no, no, no, no..." She cries out when she sees me. She begins to claw at her neck and I watch as Four expertly cradles her and begins to soothe her.

"Tris, it's ok, he's with us. He's a good guy, he's going to take us home." He says in a low voice.

"No, he's going to kill me." She sobs into Four's shoulder.

"Shh, he's not going to hurt you, I promise. He helped to save us, he led this group here to rescue us." Four says in a soft voice.

"What do you mean?" She asks.

"We're going home Tris." Four replies.

"Back to our house? Why are they pointing guns at Marcus? Tobias, what have you done?" She asks angrily.

"Tris, please listen to me, Marcus isn't who you think he is. He's been lying to us this whole time. Please trust me. These people know us; they know our life in Dauntless." Four pleads.

Before Tris can say anything else the transport truck from Candor arrives and several Dauntless soldiers step out. We watch as Jack Kang slips out the passenger side door and approaches Marcus.

"Marcus Eaton." Jack says in his soft, but stern voice. "You are under arrest for war crimes." Jack gestures for his soldiers to apprehend Marcus.

"What did you do Marcus?" Tris cries.

"Everything they said." Marcus admits. "Beatrice, you are the key to everything. You will _never_ be safe."

"What, why? Tell me what you know. Why did you do this to us?" She screams.

"Destroy it!" Marcus shouts at Tris.

"I don't understand." Tris begins and Marcus lunges towards Will and roughly grabs his pistol from his hands. Before anyone can properly react, he has put gun to his own head and pulled the trigger. Marcus limply falls to the ground and Tris' screams echo off of the empty grey buildings that surround us.

"No! What have you done? No!" Tris repeats.

I glance over at Four and he is in a state of shock, he stares at his father's dead body emotionlessly. He's unable to offer Tris any comfort at all in his current state, and I watch as she begins to tug at her hair in hysterics. I slowly approach her and she cowers away from me, sinking down to the ground and hugging her arms around her knees. I hear Peter in the background giving orders to the team, and I'm vaguely aware of Jack Kang speaking to someone on his phone. Beside me, Christina is gently comforting Four and trying to lead him away from the chaotic scene in front of him.

"Tris, it's ok, I promise you on everything I have and love that I won't hurt you. Can I come closer?" I ask gently.

"No!" She sobs.

"Ok, I'm just going to sit right here. Tris, can you look at me? Can you show me your beautiful eyes?" I ask. "You have to find a way to trust me."

 ** _Flashback - Tris POV_**

 _"You have some of the best fucking eyes I've ever seen Stiff." Eric slurs slightly as he tries to get comfortable on my tattoo chair. "Sometimes when you look me it is just distracting."_

 _"Flattery will get you nowhere with me Coulter." I scoff as I try to get him to stop fidgeting. "Eric, stop moving or this willow tree is going to turn into a fucking blob!" I scold._

 _"Look, it hurts. It's my ribs." He whines._

 _"You're the one who wanted it there you big baby. And you're the one who keeps asking me to add to it. I thought you were done with needles for awhile when we finished your coverup earlier."_

 _"I'm not a baby. Hand me my whiskey." He pouts._

 _"Ask nicely." I counter as he scowls at me. "Aww come on Eric, all you have to do is turn just a little bit of charm on and you'll get exactly what you want." I tease._

 _"I'll never get what I want." He grumbles._

 _"This is what you want, right?" I ask, shaking the bottle of whiskey at him. He shakes his head at me with a frown. "What do you want Eric?"_

 _"I want you to be with me." He mumbles softly. I immediately stop what I'm doing, laying my tattoo gun down and looking directly at him._

 _"What did you just say?" I ask._

 _Eric looks up at me, his face slightly flushed either from alcohol consumption or the realization that his resolve just slipped in front of me._

 _"My whiskey." He points over at the table behind me._

 _"Not until you tell me what you said." I reply. He scowls at me._

 _"I can get up you know." He replies._

 _"Mmmhmm." I hum as I pick up the bottle and take a long draw. "Mmmmm this is just so good."_

 _I watch as Eric licks his lips and then he brings his bottom lip in and bites it. It's so damn sexy. Oh no, what am I thinking? The brutal, rabid and murderous man in front of me is_ not _sexy. Who am I kidding? He's the very definition of the word sexy._ _Besides, I'm mostly drunk anyway, what's the worst that could happen? I take my fingers and run them along his mouth, prying his lip from his teeth. His normally silvery grey eyes are a darker shade, and he keeps them trained on me watching my every movement. My head is spinning from the intensity of our current situation, and the amount of alcohol I've consumed._

 _Eric darts his tongue out and before I can react he's taken my finger into his mouth and is sucking gently on it. His warm tongue swirls around it and I gasp as the sensation. He grasps my hand, pulling my finger from his warm mouth and guides it to mine. I easily part my lips and allow him to guide my finger into my mouth. I wrap my lips around it and begin to suck on my own finger. Eric's breathing gets ragged and the erotic nature of our interaction shoots straight to my core. He yanks my finger from my mouth and he kisses it, and then runs it along his soft lips. His lips are so warm in contrast to the cold silver hoop on his bottom lip._

 _"You are so fucking beautiful. Every damn time I see those intense eyes of yours it makes me damn crazy. God you are sexy. Why are you with him Tris? Why don't you finally see number boy for what he is? You already told me you don't love him. Leave him Tris."_

 _"You want me to leave him Eric?"_

 _"Yes." He replies quickly._

 _"Let me get this straight, you want me to leave Four and be with you?" I ask._

 _"What if I do?" He slurs._

 _"You don't mean that._ _We've talked like this every fucking night for months now, and then the very next day you treat me like I'm poison. You told me just this morning that we aren't friends and that I needed to stop pestering you about it. So, what you want from me is a drunken, down low relationship? Or is it just a conquest so you can say you fucked Four's girlfriend?"_

 _"He's not what you think." He repeats again._

 _"And you are? What exactly is it you're doing every afternoon with Jeanine Matthews, Eric? What has you so stressed out that you come here every damn night and get wasted in front of me?" I challenge._

 _"Careful Tris." He growls._

 _"Maybe you should be careful Eric. Maybe you should be leery of the company you keep outside of Dauntless. Maybe you shouldn't put a label on something or someone you know nothing about." I immediately am horrified by my words._

 _Four has told me for weeks now that Eric is helping Jeanine Matthews with a war, both against divergents and to take over the government. No matter how much he flirts with me, or how much he desires me when it comes down to it he will kill me as soon as he knows my secrets._

 _"Stop!" He shouts. "You know more about me than anyone else. Think about what you're saying Tris. Read between the lines."_

 _"I'm tired of your games." I reply and he sits up in the chair, he grabs me roughly and pulls me against his body._

 _"Three days, Tris. In three days it will all make sense. You have to find a way to trust me."_

 _"I won't ever trust you unless you stop hiding who you really are from me."_

 _ **End flashback - end Tris POV**_

"You wanted me to leave him for you. You told me he wasn't what I thought. I didn't trust you." Tris says quietly.

She's remembering. Holy shit something is giving her a flashback.

"Tris can I please come closer?" I ask pleadingly.

 ** _Flashback - Tris POV_**

 _"Tris, please talk to me." Eric pleads._

 _"No. We're done here. I finished your tattoo last night." I reply as I make my way to the back of the shop._

 _"Then give me another one." He says._

 _"You'll have to come back when Tori is here. I'm not doing it."_

 _He grabs my arm and turns me towards him. We are so close that we're sharing the same air. I can see the stubble on his chin, and the small beads of sweat on his nose. His eyes are intense, and a darker grey than I've ever seen._

 _"Tris, I need you to trust me." He says._

 _"How can I? You only let me in when you're drunk! You treat me like pure shit when you see me in public. What was last night, Eric? One minute you're sucking on my goddamn finger and begging me to leave Four, and then this morning you scream at me to leave you the fuck alone and throw me out of your office? I can't keep doing this, you are giving me whiplash."_

 _"I'm not drunk right now. I haven't had the first thing to drink all day, I'm completely sober. I don't want to be a sloppy drunk Tris, and I only push you away to keep you safe." Eric replies._

 _"Safe from what? From what everyone else tells me the only person I need to be kept safe from is YOU!" I scream._

 _Eric's glare is gone and his eyes widen. I can feel his hot breath against my face. He drops his hands from my arms and cups his hands around my cheeks. He leans in towards me slowly, and I can tell he's giving me a chance to deny him._

 _I won't._

 _He presses his lips to mine, with more gentleness than I ever thought the ruthless leader was capable of. His tongue darts out softly and I part my lips to allow him entrance. I'm instantly addicted to his taste, and the feel of his tongue dancing gently with mine. I grasp his shirt and pull him closer, while his hands work their way to my hair and he removes the pins holding my messy bun in place. He pulls back slightly from me and just looks at me, tracing his fingers through my hair as he studies me the way former Erudites do. He captures my lips with his again and softly kisses me, gently sucking my lower lip into his mouth before he works his lips down my neck and pausing to kiss each of the ravens tattooed on my collarbone. I run my fingers through his gelled back hair, freeing it from the disciplined style he always wears. He growls against my lips and pulls me firmly against his body._

 _"You are everything I've dreamed you would be." He whispers before crashing his lips against mine again. I greedily lick his lips until he grants me entrance and he allows me to dominate our kiss. I gently suck on his lower lip, taking his piercing into my mouth and he moans in pleasure. His hands are wound around my back and I'm aware of him pulling me closer to him. I can feel the heat from our bodies pressed together and he unconsciously grinds against me as he continues his passionate kisses._ _This is the most intoxicated I've ever felt in my life, and there has been no alcohol involved, I am utterly addicted to the man in my arms. My mind finally catches up with my actions and I violently push him away._

 _"What are you doing?" I yell at him._

 _"What am_ I _doing? What are_ you _doing? You wanted that too!" He yells back. He steps towards me and I hold my arms out._

 _"No, no... you stay away... you just stay away from me." I stutter._

 _"Please." He seems defeated. "Don't push me away, not after what just happened. Let me in._ _Tris can I please come closer?"_

 _ **End flashback - end Tris POV** _

"No guns please. No weapons." She says it so quietly I almost miss it.

"Ok, absolutely. Can I call someone over to take all of my weapons?" I ask and she nods. "Lynn, could you come here for a second?" I call over my shoulder and Lynn jogs over.

"What's up?" She asks, darting glances at Tris.

"I need you to take all of my weapons." I reply and she twists her face in confusion. I gesture towards Tris and Lynn nods her head.

"Sure thing." Lynn retorts and I had her all of my guns, ammo and knives. I take off my helmet and goggles, and run a hand through my messy hair.

"Tris, I gave Lynn all of my weapons and ammo. Can I come closer now?" I ask and wait for Tris to reply. I see her trembling slightly. "I promise you I won't do anything to hurt you."

I see a short nod and I walk over to where she's sitting. I squat down in front of her and take a deep breath.

"Tris, what can I do?" I ask softly.

"I can't tell what is real." She whispers.

 ** _Flashback - Tris POV_**

 _"What's going on with you and Eric?" Tobias asks me angrily._

 _I look up from the vegetables I'm cutting. "What are you talking about?" I ask, praying that my voice won't betray the nervousness I'm feeling. I've been avoiding Eric all day even though he's been desperately trying to talk to me. I'm not ready to deal with my feelings right now. The kisses we shared last night did nothing to quell the desire that's been building these past few months for him._

 _"Stop playing stupid. I saw you two last night Tris. Did you forget that Tori had me install a camera in her back room after the incident with the initiates who kept stealing her supplies?"_

 _Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck._

 _"It's not what it looked like." I begin and Tobias grabs my arm roughly._

 _"Really? So it wasn't you making out with Eric fucking Coulter? The same man who is going to_ murder _you when he finds out you're divergent? You are such a fucking idiot." He seethes._

 _"Tobias, please, it was a mistake."_

 _"Tris, shut up. I don't fucking care. You are going to forget whatever the fuck you have going on with him. Take this." He thrusts a pill into my mouth and holds my mouth shut. I struggle against him and he pinches my nose shut while he keeps my mouth clamped closed._

 _"Swallow it or else I force it down your throat after you pass out. Do it now Tris!"_

 _I feel tears slipping down my cheeks and I become lightheaded from the lack of oxygen. I tip my head back and allow the pill to tumble down my throat. Tobias smiles as he removes his hand from my nose._

 _"Open up, let me see." He says as he forces my mouth open and probes for the pill. I gag when he shoves his fingers near my throat. "Good girl."_

 _"What's was that?" I choke out._

 _"Something that will help you forget the things you need to forget, and remember only the things you should." He replies. "Don't worry, your precious lover got the same treatment too. I'm so sorry to have to break you two up like that, it truly looked like it was just getting started last night."_

 _"You drugged us? Why?" I ask._

 _"You're too easily distracted Beatrice. We need you to focus. I've been trying to convince everyone that you're on our side and they all told me I was crazy for trusting you. Guess what, you just proved them all right. And Eric, who would have thought that Jeanine's most loyal little lap dog would be fraternizing with the enemy? Lucky for him, his secret is safe with me. We need him right in his place for this plan to work. Aww, you look so sad right now. Are you gonna miss your lover? Were_ _you fucking him Tris?"_

 _"Who is everyone? What side are you on? What's happening to me Tobias? Why am I so confused right now?" I ask._

 _"Just give it a few minutes and you'll be fine. They gave me one of those pills weeks ago and look at me, I am perfectly fine."_

 _"Tobias, what are you doing to me?" I ask groggily._

 _"It's for your own good."_

 _ **End flashback - end Tris POV**_

"Is this real?" She asks in a small voice. She seems broken and it's taking everything in my power to remain calm.

"Yes, this is real." I reply carefully. "Tris, there's something you and I used to do to help you determine what was reality."

"What was it?" She whispers.

"It involves touch. Can we try it?" I ask.

She doesn't answer and I can hear her crying. She's breaking down and I can't take it anymore. I sit down in front of her and pull her into my lap, wrapping my arms completely around her trembling body. I pull her as close to my chest as possible, careful not to hurt her.

"I know you are terrified right now and I am too Tris. I'm right here though, I will never leave you." I whisper close to her ear and I feel her body begin to relax against mine. She moves her hands from where they were tightly fisted in front of her and I feel her wind her arms around my torso. She moves her head to the crook of my neck and she takes a deep breath in.

"I'm so scared." She says making her breath tickle my neck.

"I know you are. You've been through so much. I'm going to figure this out Tris; I am going to find a way to keep you safe."

"Promise me." She whispers.

"I promise you. I will always protect you, for the rest of our lives."

She nods once against my neck and then she turns so she can wind her legs around me. We sit quietly holding each other until I hear footsteps approaching.

"Hey, I'm sorry to interrupt but we have everything taken care of. We're all ready to head back." Christina says quietly from next to me.

Tris picks her head up from my chest and looks at her best friend. "Will kissed you. You said you two had gone for a walk and he stopped you by the train tracks and kissed you." She says out of the blue and I take a sharp breath in.

Christina may be rattled but she's handling it like a pro. She smiles down at Tris before she answers. "You _can_ be a girl!" She says with a grin. "And for the record, he kisses me all the time now."

Tris lays her head back down on my chest but doesn't take her eyes off of Chris.

"Give us a few minutes and then I think we'll be ready." I say to Christina and she nods her head. She smiles warmly at Tris before walking away.

"What are we to each other?" Tris asks as she nuzzles into the crook of my neck again.

I can imagine she can hear my heart pounding in my chest at her familiar words. Memories of us lying together on her cramped cot in a cell in Erudite flood my mind and I can feel the lump forming in my throat. I squeeze her a little before finally composing myself enough to answer.

"Soulmates." I finally manage to say. I can feel Tris move her head against my neck. "You are the love of my life." I say without thinking.

"Moving out!" Edward shouts from behind us. Tris tightens her grip on me.

"Hey, I won't let you go, ok?" I whisper to her and she nods against me. I manage to stand without dropping her, maneuvering her so that I'm carrying her bridal style as she buries her face in my neck. I glance up and catch Four's eyes; he looks completely dazed as Christina and Will lead him to the back of the truck that is waiting for us.

"I've already made arrangements with the infirmary and they have beds and anti-serum ready for both of them." Lynn says while she helps me into the back of the truck.

"Good, thank you for that." I reply. I sit down against the side wall of the truck bed and maneuver Tris onto my lap. She winds her arms around me tightly.

"This is real." She whispers and I kiss the top of her head.

"Yes baby, it is." I reply. I rest my chin on the top of her head as the truck slowly starts moving. Within minutes Tris is fast asleep. I hold her a little closer and just breathe her scent in, momentarily shutting out everything around me.

I can hear everyone talking excitedly, the adrenaline from the rescue is still pumping fully. I glance over at Four and the despondent look is still present on his face. I nudge his boot with my own and he looks at me.

"I'm sorry about your father." I say to him.

"Thanks. I know he was an awful human being, but I wasn't prepared to see that." He replies.

"No one expected that." I reply. "I'm sorry about this too. I know the two of you were dependent on each other these past two weeks."

"I'm not in the least bit sorry about any of that. She's deeply in love with you, so much that memories of you come back no matter what she's been given. She'll make it through this one too. Her being relaxed enough to fall asleep with you is progress, believe me." He replies.

"Thank you for taking care of her."

"Thank you for not giving up on finding us." He retorts. He leans forward to shake my hand and I return the gesture.

Tris stirs in my lap, looking up at me sleepily. I push her hair away from her face and kiss her forehead. She smiles slightly, then takes a deep breath before she falls back to sleep. I kiss the top of her head again and lean my head against hers.

"How is she?" Edgar asks as he scoots closer to us.

"Terrified and confused." I answer honestly.

"This is progress." He nods towards where Tris is snuggled against me.

"Yeah it really is. I don't know what that bastard was trying to accomplish by wiping her again, and now we'll never fucking know."

"Actually, we will. I have the box." He replies with a smile.

"No fucking way. How?" I ask.

"Ran in after he shot himself. He shouted at Tris to destroy it, and I remember what Four had told us about it. There was no way in hell I was leaving it behind. My father died protecting it, and my sister almost died for it as well." He replies somberly.

"You're brilliant. I think you might have Erudite and Dauntless in you as well." I reply.

"Everything except Amity. Fucking hippies." He replies with an eyeroll and I chuckle.

"I know you." Tris says quietly from her place on my lap, startling both Edgar and me.

"Yes, you do." Edgar says carefully.

"I don't remember how I know you, but I know that I do." She says warily.

"It'll come back to you, don't worry. You're doing really well." Edgar replies with a smile. This seems to relax Tris a bit.

I can feel her shifting on my lap and she takes in a sharp intake of breath.

"Tobias." She calls out and he looks over at her. She untangles herself from me before speaking again. "I'm so sorry."

"Hey, you have nothing to be sorry about." Four replies.

"Your father…." Tris begins and Four shakes his head.

"No. He deserved to die for all of his crimes. He just saved the hassle of another trial and execution." Four replies evenly.

"Our marriage though. I don't know what's gotten in to me." Tris replies.

"Tris, you are exactly where you are supposed to be. Believe me when I say that. I don't even know if our marriage is real." Four replies and he glances at me.

"We can find out, all marriage licenses get filed with Candor. If they have record of the license, then you're married." I reply while trying desperately not to show Tris how rattled this has me.

"And if they don't?" Four asks.

"Then the marriage isn't legal. You can go through all of the pomp and circumstance of a ceremony, but if the license doesn't get filed then it's not legal and binding." I explain.

"We're pulling in by the infirmary loading dock." The driver yells back to us. We feel the truck roll to a stop and soon the back doors are opened so we can exit. Tris continues to cling to me, but she scoots off my lap and stands on her own. As soon as I stand she reaches for my hand and threads our fingers together.

She is definitely on edge, her eyes dart everywhere and she's jumpy and skittish as we walk into the infirmary. Her grip on my hand is almost painful and she sticks close to my side. We're greeted by the doctor on call, a severe looking man with a septum piercing and facial tattoos. Tris cowers in his presence.

"It's ok Tris, no one here will hurt you." I whisper close to her ear.

"I'm Adam Conley, the resident doctor on duty today. We've prepared rooms for the patients. Miss Prior, this will be your room, and Mr. Eaton you're right next door. Please put the gown on and get into bed, we'll be in shortly to administer the first dose of anti-serum and to take some blood." He says matter-of-factly.

Edward, Lynn, Christina and Will accompany Four into his room, while Edgar, Peter and I go with Tris.

"Here's your gown, we will step out so you can get changed." Edgar says and we turn towards the door. Tris' grip on my hand tightens and when I meet her eyes I can see the panic.

"I'll stay, I'm right here." I say softly to her and she nods her head.

"I feel like I can't be away from you. I'm sorry if it bothers you." Tris says softly, looking down at the floor.

I put my hand under her chin and tilt her head up so we can look at each other. I move my hands so I'm cupping her cheeks and I can feel her leaning into my touch. She puts her hands on my forearms and looks up at me through her lashes.

"I don't ever want to be away from you. You will never bother me." I reply and she smiles briefly. I trail my thumbs across her cheeks and she looks up at me sharply.

"This is familiar. You've done this before to comfort me when I was afraid." She says.

"Yes, I have."

"It's nice." She replies with a sigh. I move my hands from her face and bring them behind her back. I pull her close to me and embrace her. She holds on to me tightly and nuzzles my neck.

"Let's get you changed."

We reluctantly pull apart and I turn away to give Tris some privacy while she changes into her gown. She climbs into the bed and I pull the covers over her.

"Are you warm enough?" I ask.

"For now, yes, thank you." She replies. "You can let the others in."

Peter and Edgar keep the conversation light, and an overly tired Tris plays with my fingers in our entwined hands. When the doctor came in to give her the first dose of anti-serum, she reverted back to the cowering and terrified girl we pulled from Marcus' arm. The doctor ordered a mild sedative, which they administered with great resistance from Tris, however she has been resting comfortably in her bed for the past almost 5 hours. Her grip on my hand has relaxed greatly but I'm in no hurry to move it. They've given her several more doses of the anti-serum since she's been resting, and finally an IV was ordered since her resistance to common serums was causing the antiserum to be partially rejected.

"Mr. Coulter." The doctor says quietly as he enters the room. "The latest blood work on Miss Prior is excellent. There are barely any traces of the memory serum in her bloodstream. Mr. Eaton no longer has any of the serum present, and he is awake and alert if you'd like to see him."

"I can't leave her." I reply.

"Understood." He replies before leaving the room.

I shift my weight in the uncomfortable chair, trying not to disturb Tris. I lean my head against the back of the chair and close my eyes briefly.

"You'd be a lot more comfortable if you'd just come lay with me." Tris says in her sleep thickened voice.

I open my eyes and look at her; she smiles at me and pats the bed next to her.

"How are you feeling?" I ask.

"Tired, and confused. I feel like there are chunks of my memories missing again, but even more so than the last time." She replies.

"Tris, do you know who I am?" I ask tentatively.

She looks at me with a strange expression, and I begin preparing myself for her answer.

"You're my fiancé. How could I possibly forget that?" She replies groggily. "Come to bed, I'm cold."

I get up quickly, kicking my boots off and I climb into bed next to her. She turns to face me, wrapping one arm around me and tucking her head under my chin. I wrap myself around her and I can feel a tear slipping down my cheek.

"I love you." Tris says sleepily as her body begins to relax against mine. I swallow the lump in my throat.

"I love you too, so damn much."


	28. Chapter 28

**AN: Thank you all again for the reviews and kind words. I tried to reply to all of you, but if I missed you I'm truly sorry. You all are my motivation :)**

Eric POV

Tris is sleeping soundly against me when I hear the text alert go off on my phone. I grab it from my pocket carefully so that I don't disturb her. Surprisingly, the message is from Jack Kang. When I texted him earlier to have him look in to the mysterious marriage license I fully expected to not hear from him until sometime in the next few days. The faction, and apparently the man as well never sleeps.

I read the message several times over, feeling the dread lift slowly with each passing.

 _J: There is no record of any marriage for Tobias Eaton and Beatrice Prior. I've ran a records search on each individual name and the two together. They have never been married, to each other or to anyone else._

 _E: Thank you. This is the best news I've had in a long time._

 _J: You are most welcome. Do let me know if you need someone to officiate your marriage. I'm available._

 _E:_ _How do you know that we're engaged?_

 _J: Call it intuition. Take care of each other, and feel free to reach out if you need anything._

 _E: Thank you._

I put my phone back into the pocket of my cargo pants and I wrap my arm around Tris again. She moves slightly against me but I can tell she's still asleep.

The door opens quietly and I watch as Four and Edgar walk in. They are careful to close the door noiselessly when they see Tris sleeping. Edgar sits in the chair next to the bed, and Four approaches and glances at me.

"She ok?" He whispers.

"Serum is almost completely gone." I whisper back. "I heard you've been cleared."

He nods in affirmation. "Yeah we were just about to leave but we wanted to check on you two first."

There is an awkward silence as he watches Tris sleep. I glance over at him and his face is expressionless, but he appears lost in thought.

"I appreciate what you did for her." I reply.

"I wish I could have done more. I have no idea what Marcus did to her." He replies quietly. "Has she talked about it?"

"She doesn't remember it." I whisper.

"That's probably a good thing. She was almost catatonic every evening when they returned. Whatever he put her through was traumatic." He warns.

"I know. I'm preparing myself as much as I can for when those memories start to return. I just wish I had an idea of what to look for this time."

"You know it's not over, right? They're never going to stop coming for her." He whispers.

"I know." I agree. "Do you know who else was working for him?"

Four shakes his head. "Not really. There were a few men who I may recognize if I saw them again. Whatever they were planning is much bigger than a few people meeting in a kitchen at night though. You've done a good job in protecting her, but you can't continue to do it alone."

I can feel my anger flaring up and I struggle to keep it at bay before speaking again. "And you can? You're not going to waltz back into her life like nothing happened Four."

Edgar cuts me off. "Eric, stop. We're all on the same side here."

Four glares at me. "You need to get over your jealousy. I don't remember everything about our past, but I do know I thought I was in love with her at some point. I do love her, but not in the way you assume, and even if you don't want to acknowledge it she feels the same way about me. She and I will always protect each other."

I glare at him but say nothing, because in reality he is right and I'm not able to actually say those words to him. Tris stirs slightly and her eyes flutter open.

"Hey baby." She says to me as she leans in for a kiss. I peck her lips.

"Hey love. We have company." I gesture my head towards Four and Edgar. Tris turns over and presses her back against me.

"Edgar." She smiles and he leans over to kiss her forehead.

"Hey baby sis. How are you feeling?" He asks.

"My head is foggy, but good all things considered." She glances next to him. "Tobias." She whispers and he smiles at her.

"Hey. You remember me?" He asks.

"Yes, I do. Thank you for protecting me from Marcus."

"Tris, I didn't protect you." Four argues.

"Yes you did, I'm alive and here with my fiancé because of you." Tris grabs my arms and pulls them tighter around herself. I squeeze her slightly and rest my chin on her shoulder.

"I couldn't protect you from his torture. All for that fucking box." He growls. "Dammit, we left the box!" He shouts, causing Tris to jump.

"Edgar has it." I reply quickly. Four looks at him sharply.

"You never told me. Have you opened it?" He asks.

"Whatever's inside that box was enough that our parents died protecting it. Tris and I need for us all to be together when we finally find out what's inside." Edgar replies.

"So the marriage license..." Four begins then swallows thickly. He glances at me.

"Never filed. Jack already confirmed it. I can't explain where it came from, but I can assure you that the two of you have never been married, to each other or anyone else." I reply. I can feel Tris relax in my arms and she squeezes the hands we have threaded together. I plant a kiss on her neck and Four smiles briefly at the two of us.

The door opens again and the doctor and one of Tris' nurses come in. "Miss Prior, you are free to leave. Your last four blood tests showed no traces of the memory serum." He says as the nurse removes her IV. "You two are quite lucky." He says to Four and Tris. "Your resistance to serums saved you both from what is typically an irreversible condition with the memory serum."

"Thank you Doctor." Tris replies and he nods before glancing at me, he gestured for me to follow him outside.

"I'll be right back. You all catch up." I say before kissing Tris briefly. Four gives me a strange look but says nothing as I slip out the door. Dr. Conley is waiting in the hallway and he gestures for me to follow him. We go into his office and both sit.

"Mr. Coulter, there are some things I wanted to talk about, however I didn't think it was wise to do so in front of Miss Prior."

"I'm Eric, and she's Tris, no need for formalities. What's going on?" I ask.

"We've never seen a serum quite like the last one that Tris was given. The fact is that the antiserum _shouldn't_ have worked against it since it wasn't even designed to combat something as complex as that strain of memory serum. It's my belief that the antiserum did combat the parts of the serum that it recognized, however Tris' resistance may have fought against the rest."

"This is good, right?" I ask. The doctor shakes his head.

"I can't say with a certainty that she will have no residual affects from the unknown parts of the serum she was given. Tris doesn't fight all serums, healing serums and vaccinations work well on her. Some examples of serums she cannot fight are the infuenza vaccine she gets yearly, along with the birth control serum and the STD protection serum she gets twice a year. This memory serum she was given is extremely complex, and Tris is the only person who's been given this mutated serum and survived according to all of the records we've dug up in Erudite. The bottom line is we need to be careful, and just keep an eye on her. If she starts showing any unusual symptoms or behaviors she needs to come in for treatment."

"I understand."

"Eric, one last thing. I'm not sure if the mutated serum she was given will have any ill effects on the other serums that have worked on her in the past." He says and he pauses when he sees the look on my face. "We've tested her while she was here, and she's not pregnant and has no STDs, plus we've given her both serums since she was due for them in less than a week anyway. However I can't say with certainty that either serum will work the way they have in the past. You both may want to consider other methods of birth control until we know for sure that her body won't expel or combat these serums."

"How will we know these things?" I ask.

"Tris will need to follow up next week for blood testing, this way we can look for any changes in her bloodstream due to the mutated serum, and we can also check the level of the birth control and STD serums as well." He explains. "I'm not telling you any of this to worry you, I just want to make sure that you're aware of her condition and you'll inform us if anything changes."

"I certainly will. Thanks doctor." I reply as he stands to shake my hand. He sees me out of the room and I find Tris dressed and waiting in the hallway with Four and Edgar.

"I want to go home. They said we can come by their place later tonight to open the box." Tris says and I raise an eyebrow at Four.

"I'm staying with Edgar and Peter." Four explains and I nod. "Want to meet in a couple of hours?"

I glance at Tris and she nods.

"Sure." I say and Four and Edgar bid us both goodbye before walking away.

Tris and I head to our apartment and once we're there she heads straight for the bathroom. I start the shower as Tris begins brushing her teeth and I smile at the familiarity of the situation.

"Hmm?" She hums at me as she makes eye contact with my reflection in the mirror.

"I missed this." I reply as I begin brushing my teeth.

Once we've finished brushing our teeth Tris undresses and enters the shower. She looks expectantly at me.

"You want me in there with you?" I ask quietly.

"Yes." She answers simply. I undress and step under the warm water with her.

Tris wraps her arms around me and snuggles against my chest. I trace my fingers up and down her spine and feel her relax into my touch.

"I don't want you to treat me differently than before. I won't break." She says.

"I know." I reply quietly. She pulls away from me and looks up at me.

"Eric, please talk to me."

There's a part of me that wants to tell her everything, how I'm convinced that she will never be safe because of her specific type of divergence. Or how I'm terrified that I'm not able to protect her. She disappeared right under my nose last time, and Tris isn't the type of person who likes feeling trapped. She fled Abnegation because she couldn't ever feel free, and now I'm faced with figuratively caging a bird who yearns to fly.

I lean down and kiss her tenderly. She puts her hands on the back of my head and pulls me hungrily towards her. Our emotions are flying all over the place, and this could be only a distraction. I reluctantly break our kiss and look down at her.

"It's not a distraction. I know we need to talk, but I want you Eric." She says as if she's reading my mind.

I remember the doctors words about her birth control and realize I need to talk to her about it.

"Tris, the doctor pulled me aside earlier to tell me that because of the unknowns that were in the mutated memory serum you were given its possible that other serums might not work as expected with you." I tell her slowly.

"Meaning?" She asks while looking at me in confusion.

"That it's possible that the birth control injection that you just received may not work the same way it has for you before." I explain and she nods her head.

"I see. I take it you'd like to find another method of birth control just in case." She says. The inflection of her voice gives nothing away, and I'm not entirely sure what she's thinking.

"No." I reply. I think it's better to just be honest at this point.

"No? Eric if we continue unprotected and the serum doesn't work the way it should we could end up pregnant." She reasons.

"Ok." I reply.

"You are really okaying me right now? Be serious." She replies with a frown.

"I am being serious. If you get pregnant it's fine. I've told you multiple times I want you to be the mother of my children. If it happens now or ten years from now my answer will still be the same. What about you Tris, what do you want?" I ask.

"I want you to make love to me." She answers.

"Even with the slight chance..." I begin but she interrupts me.

"Yes. Please Eric."

I can't, and won't ever say no to those pleading eyes. I lift her chin and kiss her deeply, pouring every bit of love I have for this woman into our kiss. She returns the kiss with the same fervor, and I gasp when she begins stroking me as she kisses down my neck and chest.

She drops to her knees and takes me into her mouth and I feel like I could explode just from the warmth and grip of her mouth working me in and out.

"Baby..." I breathe out as she continues to swirl her tongue around my head, and swallows each time she takes me in. "Baby, I'm not going to last long and I need to be inside of you."

She stands up and I pick her up, entering her quickly as I press her against the wall. I kiss her neck and up to her mouth as we move against each other.

I glance down at where our bodies meet and I watch in amazement at how easily we fit together. The old me wouldn't have gone over two weeks without sex, and I would have had any number of different women in the rotation once Tris was gone, especially with how many people were voicing their suspicions about her having left me for Four. Not only did I never even think of being with anyone else while she was gone, I couldn't even look at another woman, even though they tried. What I feel for Tris is real, and there will never be another woman who will be what she is to me.

"I love you Eric." She breathes against my mouth before claiming my lips with hers again. I can feel her walls start to pulse against me and I increase my pace chasing my own rapidly approaching release.

"Tris..." I call out as I pound against her, releasing my seed into her as we both tremble against each other. I slide over to the bench and pull her on top of me.

"I love you too." I whisper against her cheek as she embraces me tightly.

We finally finish our shower even though we can barely keep our hands off of each other. Tris is wrapped in a towel standing in our closet looking for clothes to wear and I sit on the corner of the bed in my own towel and watch her.

"What do you think is inside that box?" I ask her.

"Marcus thought it was information about what's outside the wall." She answers.

"What do _you_ think Tris?"

"I don't know what to think. My parents were protecting it, I mean they felt it was worth risking their lives for whatever it is." She answers while walking towards me. She straddles my legs, sits on my lap and wraps her arms around me. I throw my arms around her waist.

"How would they have gotten the information?" I ask.

"I don't know." She replies.

"They never talked to you about it?"

"No." She replies as she shakes her head.

"That's incredible. How could they sit on this knowledge and never speak of it?" I shake my head in disbelief.

"Things are different in Abnegation Eric. We didn't have personal conversations or divulge in anything that would be considered unnecessary. I know nothing of my parents past, you saw that I had just learned that my mother was Dauntless recently." She explains.

"Tris, while you were gone I did some research on your mother in hopes that I would uncover some information that would help me find you. There's no lineage records for your mother. It's almost as if she just showed up here one day...there was no record of either of her parents, no siblings, nothing."

"How could that be?" Tris asks.

"I have no idea." I reply.

"What was she hiding..." Tris whispers and lays her head on my shoulder.

"Baby, I don't know. It could just be bad recordkeeping or lost files." I begin.

"Or it could be because she was never Dauntless to begin with."

"Tris, I didn't tell you any of this to worry you. I just thought you'd want to know." I explain as I rub my hands up and down her back.

"Thank you for not keeping it from me." She whispers.

"We're going to figure this out. Tris, you trust me right?" I ask.

"With my life." She replies as she leans back to look in my eyes. She leans in and kisses me and for a few minutes nothing else exists outside of our room.

"What are you thinking about?" She asks.

"Nothing. That's the beauty Tris...sometimes when it's just you and me I can block the outside world out for a few minutes and just concentrate on us. Nothing else matters in those moments, and right now is one of those moments for me." I reply. She pushes my curly hair away from my face and smiles at me.

"One day those moments will become our normal." She says before kissing me again.

I unwind the towel from her body and drop it to the floor as our kisses deepen. I kiss down her jaw, her neck and work my way down to her breasts. I run my tongue around her hardened nipples and I feel her tugging at the towel that's still wound around my waist. She stands up so I can move and she removes the towel quickly, dropping it on the floor with her own.

I watch the way she moves, her toned body is firm but she has the curves that I love. I've memorized the way she feels and I can read her without ever hearing her speak just based on the way her muscles contract.

I scoot back further on the bed as she gets on her hands and knees and crawls to me. She's so fucking sexy right now with the way she's almost stalking her prey and she knows exactly what she's doing to me. She's yet to touch me but I'm completely hard for her already just by watching her movements.

She kisses my calf and peppers kisses all the way up to my inner thigh. Her hands are still flat on the bed as she moves her mouth to my other leg. She shifts so that her breasts rub against me lightly every once in awhile but she makes no effort to touch me fully. Her mouth works up my inner thigh and then I feel her running her tongue across my hip as she moves to straddle me.

She kisses her way up my stomach and flicks my nipple rings with her tongue, teasing me by biting them and sucking them into her mouth. I go to move my hands and she stops me immediately, holding my wrists down onto the bed as she claims my mouth. She hungrily kisses my neck and back up my jaw before giving me a dominating kiss. She then sits back on her knees and peers down at me.

"Tell me what you want." She whispers in a voice so laced with seduction it almost makes me cum.

"I want you." I reply.

"How do you want me?" She asks as she slowly rubs her wet core against me. I try to move my hips but somehow she's able to stop me.

"Fuck Tris I'm going to explode."

"I'm yours. Tell me what you want to do... or better yet, take what you want from me." She moves completely off of me, sitting on her knees and running her hands over her breasts.

I immediately sit up on my knees and drag her to me. I kiss her hard while I work two fingers inside of her heat. She is absolutely soaked and she begins moving her hips against me.

"Get on all fours." I growl to her as I remove my fingers from her.

"What do you want me to do?" She asks while peering over her shoulder at me.

"I want you to enjoy what I'm about to give you." I mumble as I thrust inside of her. She moans loudly as I grip her hips with my hands and begin a brutal pace. "Can you take it Tris?"

"Yes..." she moans breathily.

I pound into her and her moans get louder as her walls pulse against me. I take one hand and grip her throat, pulling her up so her back is almost flush with my chest. I squeeze her throat gently and whisper in her ear.

"Do you like what I'm giving you?"

"Yes." She purrs.

"Do you like it when I fuck you?"

"God yes."

I apply a little more pressure to her throat and soon I feel her walls clenching on my cock as she starts calling out my name breathily. I move my hand from her throat and push her back down on the bed and pull her hips closer to me.

"You will cum again." I growl to her as I snake one of my arms around her and start rubbing her swollen bundle. "But only when I say so."

"Fuck, Eric..." she yells as I pound into her harder than before. The headboard is slamming against the wall hard, and the bed is moving so much that one of our lamps falls off the nightstand. Neither of us stop, and Tris is repeatedly screaming my name as I slam into her.

"Not yet." I command when I feel her walls fluttering against me.

"Eric...please..."

"I said _not yet_." I hiss as I yank her hair hard, pulling her up against my chest again and I continue rubbing her clit while pounding her from behind. She is moaning loudly and wailing. I can feel my orgasm rushing towards me.

"Now Tris. Cum on me right now." I command and she falls apart, her walls clench down and pulse against me harder than ever before and I see white spots in my vision when I finally release while yelling her name repeatedly.

She slumps forward and I can't help but fall behind her, trying desperately not to crush her with my body weight. I roll off of her and try to catch my breath. I feel her roll against me, both of our bodies are slick with sweat as we pant against each other. The only noises in our room are our heavy breaths.

After just a few minutes Tris silently rolls off of me and out of bed. She walks to our bathroom without saying a word and I'm immediately worried. I hear the shower start and I move towards the bathroom. Tris has both of her hands on the counter, with her head hanging down.

"Baby?" I call out. Tris looks up at me. "Did I hurt you?"

She says nothing and I see her face begin to crumble. I immediately move towards her and take her in my arms. "I'm sorry, please don't cry, I'm so sorry."

"Stop." She says in a tear choked voice.

"I can't, I obviously hurt you and I'm so fucking sorry. What can I do?"

"You didn't hurt me at all. I _loved_ what we just did." She says.

"Why are you crying?" I ask as I rock her gently side to side.

"Because we finally are us again. We're not distracting each other, we're not only halfway present when we're making love, and we weren't in a rush because someone might walk in or we have to go to a fucking trial or execution. We are finally us. It feels like our true first time. I'm a girl and I got all emotional."

I relax against her and hold her close to me. "You are so right. That was amazing, and it felt so right. I was so afraid I had hurt you when you reacted the way you did."

"I loved every bit of it." She replies. We kiss each other deeply before taking another quick shower. This time we're able to get dressed without distracting each other and soon we are getting ready to leave the apartment.

We are lacing up our boots to head out when Tris tosses me my jacket. She notices a small box fall out of the pocket, she walks over and picks it up and then looks at me.

"Eric...?" She asks.

"Open it." I reply. She flips the hinged lid of the box and she chokes back a small cry. I drop to one knee in front of her and take her free hand in mine. "I promised you a ring and a proper proposal on bended knee. I've been carrying that ring around ever since you disappeared because I knew that one day I'd be able to give it to you. I don't have any special speech planned and it's pretty well known that I'm not great with my words when it comes to you so just hear me out." I swallow the lump in my throat before continuing. "I think I've spent most of the time I've known you driving you away and pissing you off, but somehow I was lucky enough to have you fall in love with me."

Tris giggles at me and I kiss her hand before I continue.

"I have loved you for a long time and it scared me, but one day I stopped being an idiot and just went with it. And it's good with us Tris, it's so fucking good. Being with you has changed me, and what we have made me realize why no one ever meant a damn thing to me before you. I spent my life looking for what we have made here together, even when my stubborn pride wouldn't allow me to act on it. You are the love of my life Tris, those are words I'd never thought I'd say to anyone but you are it for me. I promised you I'd spend the rest of our lives showing you how much I love you and I mean that with all of my being."

I take a deep breath and let it out shakily. Tris squeezes my hand and smiles at me.

"Beatrice Elizabeth Prior, will you make me the happiest bastard alive and become my wife?"

"Yes." She says with tears in her eyes. I take the ring and slip it on her finger and she drops to her knees in front of me and kisses me breathless.

"Did I do ok?" I ask when we break apart.

"Damn right you did." She says as she admires her ring. "I love you so much Eric. You are amazing."

We spend a few more minutes wrapped around each other before finally leaving our apartment and walking to what we've nicknamed the bachelor pad. We walk in through the unlocked door and find a full house, with almost everyone immediately swarming Tris. She glances back at me with pleading eyes, so I make my way over to her and wrap my arms around her. She relaxes marginally, but her body language is still tense.

"Hey, this is a lot for her. Let's give her some space." I yell and everyone disperses.

"Thank you." Tris whispers to me and I press a kiss to her forehead. I glance over and see Edgar waiting as patiently as possible before approaching.

"Edgar." Tris whispers as her brother carefully approaches. They embrace for several seconds, whispering to each other.

"I love you baby sister." He says.

"I love you big brother. Thank you for finding us. Thank you for taking care of him while I was gone." She replies.

"He's my family too." Edgar replies.

I wander over to an oversized recliner to give the siblings some privacy. Tori and Bud come over and sit on the identical chair next to mine, followed by George and Amar who take a seat on the floor facing us.

"She looks good." Bud remarks and Tori nods from her spot on his lap.

"She does. The antiserum wiped out all of the memory serum from her bloodstream. The doc said that whatever was already absorbed could still impact their memory. This was Four's first total wipe, everything they did to him before was through that implant. But with Tris, she's had every type of memory drug those bastards made, and they estimate she's been drugged anywhere from ten to twelve times. They also don't know exactly how the mutated version of the serum may effect her long term. I haven't told her that part. She may never have her full memory back." I reply.

"She never forgets you though." Tori replies.

"You have no idea how thankful I am for that. I'm so lucky to have her." I reply. There are so many words and feelings that float around when I think about Tris, but no matter what I always think of how lucky I am that our love has been enough to keep her returning to me no matter what they try to do to rip us apart.

I glance over at Tris and see her deep in conversation with Christina, Edgar and Four. No matter how comfortable Tris is with her friendship with Four, I don't know that I will ever handle it well. Jealousy has been an issue for me for a long time, and I constantly try to fight it. Four says he's not in love with her and I want to believe it, but deep down I wonder if things are as closed for them as they both claim. Maybe I feel this way because I've never been friends with someone of the opposite sex before. It's another thing I need to work on if I want my future marriage to survive.

I'm brought out of my thoughts by a loud squeal from Christina and she is holding Tris' hand up and showing off her engagement ring.

"Looks like the cat's outta the bag." Amar says to me with a grin as he extends his hand and shakes mine. "Congrats man. You did good."

"Thanks." I reply with a smile.

Tris finally breaks apart from everyone and heads over to me. She climbs on my lap and snuggles against my chest. I rub my hand up and down her side as she relaxes further against me.

"I love you so much Tris. No matter what happens tonight, or for the rest of our lives, I love you."

"What's got you waxing poetic tonight?" She asks me with a smile.

"I've spent the entire time I've known you either chasing you or losing you, so when I have you with me I'm pretty damn happy." I lower my voice to a whisper. "Besides, I'm still riding high from our earlier activities. As a matter of fact, I am thinking about exactly how I'm going to take you when we get home."

Tris leans down and brings her mouth next to my ear. "You are not going to take me when we get home." She says. I lean back and furrow my eyebrows at her. She pulls my head close to her. "I'm going to take you." She licks my ear and my dick twitches below her.

She kisses me chastely, but we soon get lost in each other. A throat clearing next to us brings us back to reality.

"Nice show you're putting on." Christina laughs as she and Will sit down on the floor between the two recliners.

"We've had a rough few weeks, I think I'm completely entitled to make out with my fiancé any time I want to." Tris argues.

"I can't see arguing with that logic." Christina replies. "How are you doing, really?" She asks.

"Things are good. Really, really good." Tris smiles at her friend and I hold her closely.

We hear the conversations in the room die down and we look up to see Edgar placing a strange ornate box on the coffee table.

The silence in the room is deafening as he looks over at Tris before speaking.

"I think it's time."


	29. Chapter 29

Eric POV

No one is saying anything, instead I look around and see almost all eyes on the box. Zeke, Shauna, Uriah, Marlene, Edward, Lynn, Four and Peter all sit on the large U shaped couch in the room across from the side by side recliners where Tori, Bud, Tris and I sit. Will and Chris sit on the floor between the two recliners and Amar and George are sitting on some pillows close to us as well. Edgar sits on the coffee table next to the box.

"The box is unlocked. Apparently whatever Marcus had Tris doing ended up working. I haven't opened it yet, I wanted to wait until my sister was ready. She fought harder for this than anyone." Edgar says.

Tris shifts on my lap and she grabs my arms to wrap them tighter around her. I can feel her body trembling against mine. I move so my mouth is closer to her ear and speak just so she can hear me.

"We don't have to do anything you don't want."

"I'm ready for this." Tris replies, loud enough for everyone to hear her.

Edgar flips the latch on the box and opens the lid. He reaches inside and pulls out a smaller box with a button on top of it.

"That's it?" Zeke asks.

"Yeah, there's nothing else in here." Edgar replies.

His finger moves towards the large button and Zeke yells for him to stop. Shauna jumps from her spot on Zeke's lap, surprised at his sudden outburst.

"We don't know what that button will do. What if it's a bomb? Or poison?" He asks.

"Or what if you're just being paranoid?" Uriah retorts.

"It's a logical thought." Will adds.

"Why would the Priors be protecting a bomb?" Amar asks.

The room breaks out in an argument over this small device and I notice Marlene stand up and move towards it. She presses the button firmly and the top opens slightly. Music emits from the box, causing the entire room to fall silent as Marlene shrugs and returns to her spot next to Uriah. A holographic video begins playing.

 _"Hello. My name is Edith Prior, and if you're watching this video it means that an extraordinary event must have taken place._

 _There are things I will tell you that you will likely find it hard to believe and it's because you've spent your life being told the exact opposite. I hope that whatever events led to you watching this have liberated you and opened your mind to the possibility that there is more out there than what meets the eye._

 _You have been raised in a city with walls, and while many of you were led to believe these walls were in place to protect you from what's outside of your city the truth is those walls were built to keep you inside._

 _Your city is compartmentalized, ruled by a government who believes that you should only be one thing to be whole. They've divided you by a faction system, telling those who are selfless to be Abnegation, those who are free spirits to be Amity, those who are lawful and truthful to be Candor, those who are brilliant to be Erudite and those who are brave to be Dauntless._

 _I'm here to tell you that it's normal to be more than one thing._

 _We have watched those who don't fit into the faction mold get mistreated, beaten, tested on and even killed by those who couldn't appreciate the way their minds work. They are labeled as divergent, and told it's dangerous and abnormal to be who they are. Each and every one of us have different virtues inside of them, and to be forced into one faction and adhering only to their beliefs is denying the other parts of your mind. There is no such thing as being divergent, and those of you who have had the misfortune of wearing that label need to know there is life outside of the walls that contain you._

 _Your city started as a social experiment, but it spiraled out of control when the government realized they could make money by letting people watch you all. At first, the faction system seemed to work and people inside your city coexisted peacefully. We watched many of you grow, seeing how the different factions operated, and watching as teenagers chose to stay home with their families or spread their wings and fly. We've seen the beauty there is with the peacekeepers of Amity, the selfless and caring nature of the Abnegation, the pursuit of all things lawful and truthful with the Candor, the brilliance and medical developments of the Erudite and the brave and protective soldiers of Dauntless. We felt like we knew you personally, we watched people get married, have children and eventually grandchildren, and soon there were fans - we started to follow you and root for you as if you were a character instead of a real person. Our government failed you, they created a spectacle and forgot who you all were. You became someone's entertainment, and for that we are truly sorry._

 _There is only one type of person who had the traits needed to open this box, and now that you've found us we want to meet you._ _If you have made it far enough to be watching this message be brave and break free from the walls that hold you inside. All you have to do is get outside of the wall, and we will take care of the rest._

 _I wish you the best of luck."_

The video stops playing and I can see the shock on everyone's faces. Tris is the first one to break the silence.

"She's our relative Edgar. That's how our father had this box."

Edgar looks at his sister but says nothing, his shock is still obvious by the look on his face.

"So we've been lied to our whole life?" Tori asks.

"It seems that way." Zeke replies.

"Wait a minute, how do we know what was said on that video is even true?" Lynn asks.

"I think it's naive for us to believe there's nothing outside that wall." I add.

"I agree." Four adds.

"Well, that's a first." Uriah adds with a laugh.

"I too believe that there is more than we've ever been told that lies outside of that wall." George adds.

"There are people out there, they've put us inside a wall and watched us like fish in a bowl." Shauna says.

"They've let us be attacked, tortured and die." Edward says angrily.

"We need to know why." Tris says. "We need answers."

"How do you suggest we find out?" Peter asks.

"We go outside of the wall. You heard what she said, if we can get outside of the wall they will take care of the rest." Tris replies.

"I think we should go." Four says. I bite back a sarcastic comment and try to quell the jealously that is bubbling inside of me.

"I think we need to take some time to think about this. I'm not going to stop anyone from leaving, we are all adults here. However, I want to ensure whatever decision is made isn't based on a knee jerk reaction to what we just saw. Take some time to talk about it with your loved ones. There's a chance that leaving the city could lead us to something incredible and new, but there's just as much chance that it could lead us to our deaths. This isn't a group decision, this is a personal decision." I say.

"I want to go." Edgar says. "Obviously, there are factors that will weigh on my decision, but I'm comfortable enough to say I want to go. My mother caused a war, and I want to know why these people sat back and allowed it."

"Me too." Four says, looking at Edgar. "You all know what my own parents have done. I think I deserve some answers." Edgar nods in agreement.

"I'd like to go too. If I can be somewhere that my divergence isn't considered some freak show I'm all in. However, I won't be without my lady, so this is something that Marlene and I will need to discuss." Uriah says.

"Baby, I'll go with you. I've seen what being divergent in our society has done to you and to others like you. If there's a place out there that celebrates how special you are I say let's go!" Marlene adds and Uriah plants a hard kiss on her.

"What about you two? You're both divergent." Bud asks me.

"I go where she goes." I reply as I wrap my arms tightly around Tris.

"It's not just up to me Eric. We are a team, and we need to make decisions like this together." Tris argues.

"We are a team, always, but this is something I need you to take the lead on. That woman had your last name, so you have more at stake here than almost any of us, except Edgar. If you want to leave the city I'm right by your side. I love you, and I want to be wherever you are." I reply.

The discussions continue around the room and Tris turns to face me.

"Whatever we do, whether it's staying here and rebuilding the factions, or taking our chances outside the wall I want us to be married first." Tris says.

"Me too." I agree as I lean towards her and kiss her softly.

"There's something I want to talk to you about." She says quietly. I immediately tense up and she smiles as she runs her fingers through my hair. "Stop thinking the worst."

"What is it?" I ask skeptically.

"There are things I remembered when you showed up to rescue me from Marcus." She begins slowly. "Eric, did you know you were given some sort of memory altering pill?"

I look down sharply. "What?" I hiss. "When did this happen? Who Tris? Did you know about this the whole time we've been together?"

Tris runs her nails softly through my hair and across my scalp and she knows she's achieving her desired results when I sigh softly against her.

"Four, while he was under the influence of the implant, he forced a memory altering pill down my throat the day before the war. He'd told me you'd been given one the same day too, although he didn't explain how." She replies. "Of course I didn't know about it, I _just_ remembered it when I saw you again. This is a memory I had completely lost."

I think back to that day and it all makes sense. My memories became very confusing from the prewar time, including how Tris and I fit into each other's lives.

"Fuck." I whisper. "You were having a lot of flashbacks when I first saw you with Marcus and Four. Is there anything else that you recall?"

"Yes, I remembered the three days leading up to the war." She says.

"What do you remember about those days?" I ask and she continues to stroke my hair.

"You tried to get me to trust you. You asked me to leave Four for you and I wouldn't because you were only open and kind to me behind closed doors after you'd been drinking heavily." She replies.

"Yeah, that sounds like me, unfortunately." I agree.

"I remembered our first kiss." She adds.

I gape at her, realizing that it's a memory that she has that I lost somehow. "It wasn't at Amity?" I ask and she shakes her head tightly. "When...?" I ask.

"I'm skipping all over the place, I really should start from the beginning. Three days before the war I had finished this tattoo." She runs her hand along my side over where the willow tree is. "That was the night you asked me to leave Four. We were both rather intoxicated, and some lines were crossed for what appeared to be the first time that night."

"That was the night of our kiss?" I ask.

Tris shakes her head. "No." I see the blush forming on her cheeks and I smile.

"If it's making you blush it's got to be good. What happened?" I prod.

"We were flirting, which apparently is something we did quite often based on some of my other memories of us. At one point you were biting your lower lip and I pried it out of your mouth with my finger. You started sucking on my finger and then you moved it from your mouth to mine...and then back to yours. It was..." She stops talking and bites her lip.

"Erotic. Fucking hot." I finish for her and she nods. "What happened?"

"We exchanged some pretty harsh words that night. The next morning I tried talking to you but you told me you felt nothing for me and kicked me out of your office." She replies.

"I'm such a fucking asshole." I look down and shake my head as Tris lifts my chin so I will look at her.

"That night, you came back to the tattoo shop and begged me to talk to you. I was angry, because of the mixed signals you kept giving me and because of your involvement with Jeanine. I yelled at you about everything, I pretty much just laid into you and instead of you arguing back like you normally would you kissed me. It was amazing Eric. You gave me a chance to deny you and I didn't. That kiss was everything we had been fighting and we both knew it, but I got angry and pushed you away again." She explains.

"Tell me about the kiss." I whisper as I push her hair back from her face.

"You started out so gentle, it was unexpected because you're not known for being soft at all. We both deepened it, and it was just a perfect first kiss. It's hard to explain, but believe me when I say it was something special. Our kiss in Amity was too." She quickly adds.

"I can't believe I don't remember our first kiss." I reply.

"Eric, we had more than one first kiss if you think about it. What happened in Amity was after we'd both been given memory altering drugs, so neither of us remembered any of our past. It was just as much of a first kiss for us as the one in the tattoo shop." She reasons.

"I guess." I reply and Tris runs her fingers through my hair as she continues.

"The next memory I had was the next evening when Four confronted me about what was going on between you and me. He'd seen what had happened between us the night before on the cameras. When he got home from his shift at the control room, he confronted me about it. He didn't give me time to explain anything, he just forced the pill down my throat so I would forget you and cooperate with their plans. He said you'd been given the same pill for the same reasons. You had been trying to talk to me all day and I'd avoided you because I wasn't sure how to deal with my feelings. If I had of just talked to you, so much of this would have been avoided."

"Tris, you don't know that. You were having a hard time trusting me before the memory wipes, how do you know a conversation between us that day would have changed anything?" I ask.

"I don't know Eric. I think you were going to tell me what you knew about Four. If I had of known about his involvement with Evelyn I would have left him that night." She reasons.

"And someone would have still come after you. As much as I'd love to live in a fantasy world and pretend to be this indestructible hero, I know damn well I wouldn't have been able to hide you forever. Jeanine wouldn't have ever stopped looking for you." I reply.

"I could have stopped him from giving you the pill." She begins but I stop her.

"You don't know that either." I reply softly. "He erased some of our history. He took it away..." my voice raises as Tris puts her hands on either side of my face.

"He had the same thing done to him. Eric, no one took us away from each other. Even though we've struggled with our memories of each other, our love never stopped. That's why it came out during your testimony under the truth serum, and that's why I knew in Candor that I felt the same way. You see, no matter what our love is what keeps us going."

I kiss her deeply and we are interrupted by a low whistle from next to us. I see the deep blush on Tris' cheeks when she meets Tori's eyes.

"You two forget you're in a room full of people?" Tori smirks.

"Sometimes." I admit as I push Tris's hair out of her face and kiss her forehead. "I can't wait for this woman to be my wife."

"Save it for the wedding night lovebirds, Zeke wants to take a vote." Bud says as we turn our attention to Zeke.

"This doesn't have to be anything official, but can we just see where everyone's head is. Shauna and I want to stay here." He says.

"Uri and I want to leave." Marlene adds.

"I think we are going to stay here. I've always wanted to be in Dauntless, and now that I am it feels like home." Edward says as Lynn looks at him lovingly.

"We want to stay." Will says. Christina glances at Tris and mouths "I'm sorry." Tris smiles at her friend.

"I want to go." Four says and I notice a look he shares with Edgar, who nods once in his direction.

"I want to go too." Peter replies, which shocks many of us in the room.

"Amar and I want to go, but only if my sister and brother in law are going too." George says.

"Tori and I want to go." Bud adds.

"I'm going to be wherever my family is." Edgar looks at Tris and me when he says it.

"Baby?" I whisper to Tris. She looks back at me with a conflicted look in her eyes.

"I don't know what to do. I don't want you to end up resenting me for taking you away from here." She says quietly.

"Look at me." I command and she brings her eyes to mine. "My life is with you, wherever it takes us. We're both divergent, and we both were almost killed for that here. Maybe we can go somewhere else and be free." I kiss her lips softly and she runs her fingers through my hair before leaning her forehead against mine.

"I love you." She whispers before turning away. "I want to go." She announces.

"Then we will go together." Edgar replies and I lay my chin on Tris' shoulder.

"I love you too." I whisper before turning my attention to the room. "Since most of leadership is leaving, there are some things that will need to happen." I announce. "Zeke, I'm stepping down from leadership, you will be my successor. You are now Dauntless' head leader. Congratulations."

The room falls completely silent. All eyes are on me, and Tris turns so she can face me.

"Baby..." she begins. I can plainly see the conflict and sadness on her face. "I can't...you can't...you love being a leader."

"I do, but I love you more than any job. We need to go Tris, we need to live a life where we're not constantly worried that someone is going to take you away. I want more than these walls can give us."

"Eric, man, are you sure? We can run things while you're gone, and hold things down till you get back. This is your faction." Zeke argues.

I shake my head. "Zeke, you've been running this faction better than I could have ever since the uprising started. You are meant for this. Even if for some reason we end up back here, this is still meant for you." I stand up and shake his hand.

"Thank you. I won't let you down. You've been a fucking amazing leader man. I hope I'm half the leader you are." Zeke replies.

"I do have your first task as a head leader." I add.

Zeke looks nervous when he glances at me. "Ok man, should I be taking notes or something?"

"Nah I think you've got this. I need you to perform our marriage ceremony. I'm not leaving this city for the unknown without making her my wife."

"You two are getting married before you leave?" Christina asks with a smile.

"Yes. We talked about it and we don't want to leave without being married. We don't know what we're going to face out there." Tris replies.

"Can we actually have a wedding? You're my best friend, and you're leaving. Can we just have this one last hurrah before you two leave?" Chris asks.

Tris looks back at me with a smile. "What do you think?"

"You know what my answer is." I reply.

Tris smiles at me and leans in for a kiss. "So I get you in a suit?"

"A suit? Really Tris?" I scoff.

"If we are having a wedding you're wearing a suit." She counters.

"If I agree to this I'm going to need lots of incentive." I smirk.

"You means lots of sex." She replies.

"Yes, and you in a wedding dress." I reply.

"Deal." She says before kissing me soundly. This time we don't break apart when we hear the wolf whistles around us.

"When should we leave?" Marlene asks.

"I think we should wait for a couple of weeks at least. We need to make sure there are no more attempts on the remaining government leaders from any lingering people with loyalties to Jeanine or Evelyn. Or even Marcus, because he did have a few people helping him when Four and I were there." Tris replies.

"I agree. Even though we're leaving this city I don't want to leave it the way it is right now. We need to at least begin the rebuilding process." Marlene adds.

"I may be considered selfish, but I'd like for you all to stay for a little while at least. The idea of you all leaving and possibly never seeing any of you again doesn't sit well with me at all." Christina says.

"I think that waiting a couple of weeks is a good idea. This gives us all time to not only help get the city back up and running, but it also gives all of us time to ensure we are making a decision based on what we truly feel is best for us, and not on the raw emotions we are feeling today." I add.

"Which is even more reason for you to retain your leadership." Zeke says while looking at me.

"I've made my decision. I'll help in any way I can as long as I'm here, but my decision to leave hasn't changed. If for any reason Tris and I decide to stay, or if we come back, we can discuss appropriate jobs for us at that time. Zeke, I'm really ok with my decision to step down. Don't read anything more in to it. If you don't want the position..." I reply as Zeke cuts me off.

"I definitely want it. I just needed you to be sure." He replies.

"I am."

 **Page Break**

The next two weeks pass in a blur of activity. Zeke, Johanna and Jack worked together seamlessly to help rebuild the city, in some aspects literally from the ground up. The Abnegation sector was completely torn down, this decision largely based on the votes and opinions of the few surviving Abnegation members. The faction itself has been removed completely as well, with the survivors all given the ability to choose to join other factions openly. Almost all of the survivors chose to remain in Amity, with a few exceptions going to Candor.

The bulldozing of the buildings and homes in Abnegation hit both Tris and Four hard. The day before the razing was scheduled Edgar, Four, Tris and I spent the afternoon in the sector. Tris was able to find small momentos in her childhood home, and when we made it back to Four's childhood home both he and Tris broke down. Four had no happy memories from the house, either from his childhood or the time spent there when Marcus kidnapped the two of them. Tris refused to go inside, so Four and Edgar spent some time breaking the windows and destroying the contents inside the house until Four found his own way to make peace.

There were numerous trials under truth serum, where we were successful in finding some of the few stragglers who still believed in the war and uprising. Through these trials, a potential leader for Erudite emerged, and soon he was unanimously elected to be their leader. His name is Anton Spence and he has proven to be extremely fair. He and his team immediately threw themselves in to the rebuilding project, and in these two short weeks much progress was made to bring a sense of normalcy back to the residents of Chicago.

After sharing the video message with the other faction leaders, a decision was made to not make the video public until our group was able to determine what exactly was outside the wall. This decision didn't sit well with Tris, as she felt that we were being hypocritical since we were all angry that the knowledge had been kept from us for so long. After a lot of conversation and reflection, she came to a understanding and decided to stop fighting the decision. I was extremely proud of her.

Tris' follow up visits to the doctor have been good. Each time she's gone they've found the expected amount of serum present in her blood for all of her vaccines and prevention serums, and the only side affects from the memory serum for her has been headaches with bouts of dizziness and more flashbacks. She did end up having what was easily her worst nightmare yet about me and instead of it setting us back like it did after Jeanine we managed to work through it together. Things are solid between the two of us, and I couldn't be happier.

Christina and Tris have been working together to plan our wedding. What was originally just going to be a small and intimate event between us and our friends has turned into a very public wedding in the Pit. Neither Tris nor I are fans of public attention, but Chris can be very persuasive and she's played the 'I'm potentially never going to see my best friend again' card to perfection. At this point, I don't care if we are married while strapped into a harness and zip lining off the Hancock building, because for the first time in my life I'm completely unafraid of commitment and the future.

Plans have been made to head outside the wall in a little over a week. This gives us time to help get the city in a solid place before we leave it behind. Tris has watched the video from Edith Prior repeatedly, and she's been on edge as she desperately tries to figure out what her parents role in all of this really was. Our hope is that at least some of her questions will get answered if we are able to find life on the outside.

Tonight, we all finally have taken a break from things related to rebuilding the city and government and our friends have decided to separate the two of us for our bachelor and bachelorette parties.

I see my fiancée out of the corner of my eye and I stop in my tracks. She's wearing a short black dress that looks like nothing more than a longer tank top that hugs her curves perfectly and barely comes to mid thigh, along with one of my old black and grey flannel shirts from my initiate days unbuttoned with the sleeves partially rolled up. She's got her combat boots on, her hair down in the messy waves I love and her eyes are lined with black eyeliner and dark mascara. She looks fierce, and fucking sexy.

"Do I look ok?" She asks. I don't say anything and she frowns. "Chris wanted to get me ready, but I didn't want to have to dress up and wear heels all night, especially since in two days she's going to turn me into the perfect bride. Eric, say something." Words are escaping me, and instead of speaking I continue to stare at her. "I should change." She frets.

"No." I say firmly.

She furrows her brows at me. "Why are you looking at me like that?"

"You look so sexy. You are going to have so many fucking guys hitting on you or trying to get with you. Maybe we should combine our parties tonight."

She shakes her head at me. "Baby, this is good for you. Go out with the boys, have some fun. This is going to potentially be the last chance of doing this for a long time. We have the rest of our lives together, but we may not ever see some of our friends again."

I take a deep breath and pull her against me. "Fine. But under one condition."

"And that is...?" She asks.

"When we get home I want to see you in this shirt and nothing else." I growl against her ear and take great pleasure in the shiver it causes her.

"I thought you wanted to obstain until after we're married." She replies.

"Fuck that. It was a stupid idea. I want to make love to you while you're wearing my shirt. It looks so much better on you than it ever did on me." I reply as I run my hands down her sides and she shivers.

"So your own clothes turn you on?" She replies playfully.

"You in my clothes turns me on." I whisper as I kiss her neck, I bite and suck hard leaving a mark on her.

"You marked me! Dammit Eric." She looks at me with a pout.

"Just making sure they know you're not available." I reply with a smirk.

"Like this ring doesn't give that away?" She waves her fingers at me.

"I like to be sure." I reply.

She leans in and starts attacking my neck, and I can feel her leaving her own mark. I grind against her as she continues her assault.

"There. Now we're even." She smirks before pecking my lips.

"I'll wear your marks with pride."

Several minutes of us making out and dry humping like teenagers pass before we are interrupted by loud knocking on our door. Before either of us can even react, the door is thrown open and the large combined group of our friends bursts in. We are caught with Tris straddling my lap and my hands on her ass pulling her against me.

"Jesus Christ, please tell me you two aren't having sex!" Peter yells.

"We have clothes on asshole. Why are you in my apartment?" I reply. Tris tries to move but I hold her against me and I whisper to her. "You've created a situation, love."

"We knocked. Lock your door next time. Come on you two, time to separate." Peter replies.

"It's party time!" Chris yells.

"Do we need to pour cold water on you two?" Shauna laughs.

"I think you might." Amar calls out.

"Fuck, give me two minutes. You walked in on my sexy as hell fiancée grinding on my fucking dick, I either need to fuck her now or you all need to give me some time to calm down. Take your pick, but know at this point I don't give a fuck if I have an audience for either." I growl. Tris buries her head in my shoulder laughing.

"Nope, no one is fucking right now. Let's go woman!" Chris says as she and Marlene drag Tris off my lap.

"Impressive." Chris whistles as she eyes the _very_ noticeable bulge in my pants.

"Christina!" Tris yells.

"Say goodbye, we are taking you out. Have fun boys!" Tori says.

Tris bends over and gives me a chaste kiss. I growl as she tries to pull away and crash my lips into hers, kissing her deeply before letting her go.

"I love you. Come home to me in one piece." She grins.

"I love you too. I damn sure am coming home to you, I already can't wait. Don't forget, shirt only." I reply.

"You got it." She grins before giving me a quick wave and heading out with her friends.


	30. Chapter 30

Tris POV

There's something about when someone else touches my hair that usually makes me putty in their hands. It's not sexual, but it's intimate, trusting someone's touch without hesitation and allowing yourself a few uninterrupted moments of bliss. I normally can't get enough of it, except today, and my nervous fidgeting is making Christina huff at me in frustration.

"Tris, you have to stop moving. I'm never going to get this done, and don't even get me going about makeup. I mean seriously, how am I going to get you to not be so red and splotchy? You've been crying, haven't you? You're getting married today, be happy!" She admonishes.

"I'm just nervous…"

"Bullshit! You were fine up until we overheard those stupid bitches in the bathroom two nights ago. You were excited, and happier than I've ever seen you. Why are you letting them get to you?" She asks, meeting my eyes in the reflection of her mirror.

She's right, during our evening of bar-hopping/bachelorette partying with the girls I overheard some women in the ladies room talking about Eric and me. It was obvious that some of these women had been intimate with him in the past, and they were vocal in their disapproval of me. Their opinions ranged from him marrying me because I trapped him with a pregnancy, or I drugged him, or I have him under mind control. Anything but the real reason he and I choose to be together.

To top it all off, they went into details about their sexual experiences with Eric. Maybe hearing their descriptions of sex with him should have actually made me feel better, because based on what they said I could tell he put no effort into the act with them. Sure, they talked about his size and stamina, but even hearing them describe it I could tell it was nothing more than a fuck to him. Even our first time together was something special between us, and he's never once treated me like a random piece of ass. Unfortunately, the gossip and overheard conversation was enough to start the inkling of self doubt that creeps inside of my head sometimes, and as a result I've physically and emotionally blocked Eric out. His grand plans for me to come home and wear just his shirt instead turned into me crying myself to sleep while my fiancé tentatively tried to hold me even though I refused to so much as look at him. Last night was more of the same, and this morning he even asked me if I still wanted to get married. I know he's worried, but I have no idea how to even approach the subject with him.

"You heard them Chris, and it wasn't just a few opinions. It was a full blown conversation about my fiancé's sexual prowess, his inability to commit to anyone, and the myriad of rumors that many in this faction believe are the true reasons for he and I to be getting married. Tell me if you overheard something like that about Will that it wouldn't have you rattled."

Christina puts a clip in my damp hair to hold it in place and she moves so she is sitting on her vanity table and facing me.

"Tris, it was the opinion of some of the trash he associated with before you. He had a reputation before the two of you got together, and it was something you chose to overlook, for good reason. He's a good guy, even if he was a bit of a manwhore before you." She chuckles as she continues. "He's committed to you, one hundred percent. Some of those nasty sluts tried to talk to him when you and Four were gone and he'd have no part of it. He spent every second of his free time with Edgar, Peter and Edward either looking for you or making plans on where they were going next."

"I didn't think he was cheating on me." I reply with a sigh.

Christina throws her hands up in frustration. "Then what exactly has you so wound up?"

"I'm taking him away from the faction he loves, to face the complete unknown. He's a leader here and he's great at his job, and I'm forcing him to walk away from it all. Not only that, we're getting married but we've never even gone on a real date. All we've done is deal with loss, and war, and death…and everything else. We started as a distraction from all of the terrible things we were dealing with. This wasn't supposed to be anything permanent."

"Do you hear yourself right now? This doesn't sound like you at all. You've both fought through memory crap to find each other over and over again. Does that sound like something two people who didn't want to be together would do?" Christina asks.

"What if he's addicted to being the hero? Or, fixing people like me?" I ask.

"Tris, are you having doubts about being with him?" She asks me with a concerned look on her face.

"I just don't want him to give up everything he's wanted in his life to be with me." I finally admit.

"He wants you! He's doing exactly what he wants to do. This is Eric, when have you known him to not do exactly what he wanted? You've done nothing to force him to be with you, if we're being honest you've done quite the opposite when you disappeared on him in the middle of the night…or even before all of that when the night terrors from Jeanine's shit made you absolutely flip out on him in Abnegation. We literally had to pull you off of him; you went from sleeping in his arms every night to trying to maim him. Plus, when the two of you had a pissing contest over Four you two apologized and forgave each other. Both of you have had every opportunity to end this and walk away for good and neither of you have. Ok, I will admit your relationship isn't conventional, but so what? Tris, do you love him?"

"God yes, I'm so in love with him." I reply.

"Then why are you having these doubts?" She asks.

"Because I don't know if I will ever be enough for him." I reply and the tears I've been holding back finally fall. "I don't know if a life with me will be satisfying enough for him."

"Oh honey, you are _always_ enough." Chris wraps her arms around me and I bury my face in her shoulder. She rocks us back and forth gently and after several minutes I hear her bedroom door open and someone enter the room.

"I've got it from here, thanks Chris." Eric's deep voice is like velvet and I gasp. I look at Chris and she's smiling at me.

"It's a stupid tradition anyway. You needed him and I texted him to get him here. I'll be in the kitchen." She kisses my forehead and leaves the room.

Eric's dressed casually in a pair of his sweats and a loose tank top. He wraps his arms around me and I bury my face in the crook of his neck. He smells amazing, fresh from a shower with a small bit of aftershave.

"What's this I hear about my bride possibly making a run for it?" He asks and I can hear the strained smile in his voice as he tries to use the dark sense of humor we share to diffuse the situation.

"She didn't need to get you involved. I'm fine."

"The tears and possibly even snot on my shoulder beg to differ with that assessment. How about you finally tell me what's on your mind, and I'll keep letting you wipe your nose on me." He chuckles.

"It's stupid. It's nothing." I reply.

"Baby, talk to me. We don't keep things from each other, remember?" He prompts.

"I'm overthinking." I reply.

"Are you having doubts?" He asks. I don't answer him immediately, which causes him to start speaking again. "Tris, do you not want to get married?"

"Of course I want to marry you." I reply softly. I feel him running his hand up and down my back.

"You've gotta tell me what the issue is, you're scaring me a little." He replies.

"What happens if we get out there and you regret leaving here?" I ask quietly.

"That's a possibility for both of us Tris. We are going into the unknown. If we can't make it out there, we come back here. It's as simple as that. Zeke has already told us we'd always be welcome here." He replies.

"But your leadership…" I begin and he cuts me off.

"No buts, I stepped down willingly, you didn't force my hand with that. There was no need for them to have a head leader who may never come back. If we come back, we'll find work. We both have experience here that would guarantee some sort of work when and if we return. Tris, all of these 'what ifs' are things we can and will figure out on the way. What's this really about?"

"What if you realize one day that I'm not enough for you?" I whisper. At first I don't think he's heard me, but the tension in his body lets me know otherwise.

"Look at me Tris." He commands as he leans away from me.

I reluctantly bring my eyes to his and they are a steely and cold grey. This is the Eric I first met, the cold leader whose only outward emotion was the distaste and frustration that we seemed to cause him. The anger my last question caused him is radiating off of him in waves and his clenched jaw is a sign that he is struggling to quiet whatever thoughts are running through his mind. He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath in before releasing it slowly. He opens his eyes and takes my hands in his own, threading our fingers together.

"You will always be enough for me Tris. I've wanted you for as long as I can remember, and when I thought I'd lost you again it made me crazy. Look, Uriah told me what happened the other night." He says slowly.

"What? How…"

"Marlene." Eric answers.

"She shouldn't have said anything." I say angrily.

"Well I'm glad she did. You came home that night and completely shut down. For the past two days you've barely spoken to me. Tris, when Christina texted me I was sure I was coming to hear you call our wedding off." He explains. "Why didn't you say something that night?"

"Because it fucking hurt. They said that I had trapped you, or was mind controlling you. They talked about having sex with you. They talked about how there was no way you were going to be able to only fuck one woman for the rest of your life. They were horrible." I reply as the tears fall.

"What those women said is bullshit. I told you before that I never had an issue with my past because it was two consenting adults getting a release, but I was wrong." I try to pull my hands from his but he grips onto them tightly. "Stop trying to pull away from me, let me finish. I was wrong because my past is impacting my present, and even my future. Those women meant absolutely nothing to me; I will always stand by what I said in that aspect. I was never interested in settling down, I didn't much care about monogamy but not for the reasons you assume. I didn't have anyone to be monogamous for. I was not looking for a relationship with those women, and I was completely honest with each and every one of them, but it's quite possible they weren't being honest with me when they said they felt the same. The conversations you and I had when you were giving me tattoos were the first personal conversations I'd ever had with a woman. You are so fucking smart and that turned me on more than any of those random hookups ever could. You and I connect in every way possible, and anyone who voices any doubt about my love for you or about the fact that you are who I want a future with doesn't know jack shit about me. The things those women said in that bathroom were words of jealousy; they have absolutely no reason to ever pass judgment on you. Tris you are the most beautiful, intelligent, sexy, amazing woman I've ever known. I will want you for the rest of our lives. I want everything with you baby. I don't care about leadership or factions or anything like that. I don't care where we live or what jobs we take. I care about our future, and the family we'll build together." Eric says.

"You really think I will be enough for you?" I whisper.

"Baby, you are more than enough. There's never been anyone in my life like you. I love you, and there's no way in fucking hell I would ever do anything to jeopardize what we have." He replies with sincerity.

"You keep saying you're horrible at expressing yourself but I think you do a damn good job." I reply with a smile. He leans in and kisses me hard.

"Now, are we getting married today or not?" He asks with a smirk.

"Well, I guess we should. I mean, I do have a fancy new dress and all. And rumor has it my sexy fiancé is wearing a suit." I reply.

"So, tell me about this dress." He says in a seductive voice as he runs his hands up and down my smooth legs.

"Nope, you will see it soon enough." I smirk.

"How about this robe…what's under it?" He asks as he peeks inside. "Oh damn, you're naked under there. Since she decided we could see each other before the wedding, think she'd let you sneak away for a little bit?" He asks before kissing my neck.

"I think she'd understand, I mean she doesn't want me to be stressed for our wedding." I reply as I'm leaning my head back so he can get a better angle on my neck.

"Come on." He growls before grabbing my hand and pulling me out of the room.

Christina looks up from where she is painting her nails at her kitchen island. "Where are you two going? Oh my god is everything ok?"

"We just need to take care of something. I'll have her back to you shortly." Eric replies.

"Are you two ok? Is there still going to be a wedding?" Christina asks with a concerned look.

"Definitely will be a wedding." I reply.

"Oh, good, that's great. You two should be getting ready. Whatever needs taking care of can be delegated. Need me to call in reinforcements?" Christina asks. Eric sighs loudly next to me and I choke back a laugh.

"This can't be delegated, sorry Chris." I reply, tugging Eric with me.

"Please tell me you're not going to sneak away and have Zeke marry you in private. Tris, if it's about the makeup or shoes we can compromise, nothing too crazy…" Chris replies.

"Christina, I need to go have a quickie with my fiancé. We will be sure to shower afterward and I'll be back here as soon as possible. You can do whatever the hell you want with my hair, makeup, dress, shoes. Seriously, I'm open for anything, but please let me go have hot sex with my soon to be husband before the two of us explode from stress." I reply.

"Oh my gosh, get out! Just make sure I have time to get you ready. Go!" Christina replies with a fierce blush as she shakes her head.

Eric and I practically run to our apartment, and the door is barely closed before he's tugged my robe off and stripped off his tank and sweats. He picks me up and enters me quickly, making me moan loudly.

"Sorry baby, did I hurt you?" He asks.

"No, this feels great." I sigh as he continues to pound against me. We are both so worked up that within minutes I am cumming hard against him while calling out his name. Eric tumbles over the edge as I am still pulsing around him.

"Jesus, that was fast. I'm sorry, I just couldn't wait..." Eric pants against me.

"I don't know what you're apologizing for, that was exactly what we both needed. We should really shower though, we have less than two hours until the ceremony." I reply before kissing his nose and cheeks. He grins against me and wraps his arms under me securely while carrying me into the bathroom.

"I can walk you know." I remark as he starts the shower.

"After the orgasm I just gave you I didn't want to take any chances." He chuckles.

"You are so cocky." I smirk.

"Mmmhmm. I heard you screaming my name." He replies as he nips at my neck.

"No marks! Christina will kill me." I scold him. He leans back and gives me his best pout. We manage to finish showering rather quickly, and we both dress in loose casual clothes. Eric walks me back to Christina's apartment and tugs on my hand to stop me from going inside. He pulls me to him and kisses me deeply before bringing his lips right next to my ear.

"I don't regret it." He whispers. I smile at the memory of us on the train to Candor for Eric to clear his name.

"I know, I told you I could see through your mask." I reply. He brushes my wet hair back from my face and looks at me. This is my Eric, the overly curious traits of his former faction always seem to come out of him during our more intimate moments and conversations. As much as both of us despise Erudite, we both adore the good traits we have from our aptitudes for there.

"I'll see you soon. I'll be the one standing in front, in a suit, which describes the rest of the assholes who will be standing with me. Look for the most handsome one, neck tattoos, piercings, ya know?" He smirks.

"I'm glad you mentioned the neck tattoos, I mean you could have been describing Peter or Uri..." I grin at him.

"You will pay for that one." He nips at my ear and I giggle.

"I'll be the one in the white dress. Can't miss it." I smile at him and he winks at me.

"I have no idea what this dress even looks like, so I may need a peek..." He smiles.

"Not happening Mr. Coulter. Now get going. I'll see you soon." I give him a brief kiss.

"I can't wait Mrs. Coulter." He kisses my hand before walking off, heading towards the bachelor pad to finish getting ready.

I'm grinning ear to ear when I walk back inside of Christina's apartment.

"Well, you look much better than you did an hour ago. I should have texted him earlier if I'd have known all you needed was a quickie to calm the hell down." She laughs and I shake my head at her.

"It was more than just a quickie, we talked too you know." I roll my eyes at her and she giggles.

"The girls are back in my room, are you ready to become the woman of the hour?" Chris asks.

"Do your worst." I smirk.

A little over an hour later I'm standing in front of Christina's full length mirror looking at the unrecognizable woman in front of me. Christina left my hair down, her protests dying when I explained how much Eric loves my hair when it's down. I did relent and allow her to cut the damaged parts off, taking about five inches and making the length hit around my middle back. She took her time to curl my hair, and I have loose barrel curls all over. I opted to forego the traditional veil, instead I have a crown of flowers and blood red and black ribbons that flow through my hair.

My dress is strapless, showing off my many tattoos and the physique I've worked so hard to maintain during my time in Dauntless. It's a beaded corset top that laces in the back with red and black ribbons that match my headpiece, and it perfectly accentuates my curves. The skirt is long and flowing, almost like a princess. It's a perfect balance of sexy and beautiful. Chris kept my makeup subdued, but definitely Dauntless with a smoky cat eye and a red lip that matches the black and red color combination I prefer.

Marlene, Shauna, Tori and Lynn are all wearing black dresses with red sashes, while Christina wears a red dress with a black sash signifying her as my maid of honor.

"Hey, you have a visitor." Christina says and I nod at her. Four walks in, looking quite handsome in his dress uniform.

"Oh wow." He breathes out and smiles.

"Is that a good wow or a bad wow?" I ask.

"Good. So good. You are beautiful." He replies as he kisses my cheek.

"Thank you." I smile.

"I can't believe you're getting married." He says as he nervously rubs the back of his neck.

"I can't either. What's wrong Tobias?" I ask.

"Nothing at all. I'm just happy for you Tris. I'm also thankful that after everything I put you through that I can still call you my friend." He replies. "I came here with this huge speech planned, but the gist of it is that I'm really lucky to be in your life, and I'm truly happy that you and Eric found your way back to each other even though I was programmed into doing everything in my power to keep you apart."

"Thank you for saying that. I'm happy you're in my life too, and I think maybe one day Eric and you can find a way to be friends again too." I reply and Tobias nods.

"Maybe." He chuckles.

Christina pokes her head into the room. "Edgar's here too. It's time." She grins.

Tobias kisses me on the cheek and bids his farewell as my brother enters the room.

"Beatrice. My God. You look amazing." Edgar says as he kisses my forehead. "Eric is going to lose it when he sees you."

"No he won't, we're getting married in the Pit in front of the whole faction, he has a permanent poker face for situations like that." I giggle and Edgar grins. We all make our way out of the apartment and stop right outside the entrance to the Pit.

"Ready for me to give you away baby sis?" He asks as he offers me his arm. Christina hands me my bouquet and I nod nervously. We hear the music start playing and watch as the wedding party members begin walking down the aisle, starting with Uriah and Marlene. Lynn and Edward move next, and to my great surprise I see Four line up between Shauna and Tori. He looks back at me and winks.

"When did he become part of the wedding party?" I whisper to Edgar.

"Eric asked him the night of his bachelor party." He whispers back.

"Well holy shit. Hell may actually be freezing over." I chuckle.

"Things are definitely changing, but it's so good." Edgar offhandedly remarks and I glance over at him. He just smiles at me. "Later sis. This is your moment."

Peter and Chris are the last to make their way down the aisle and as the music changes Edgar leads me to the entrance. I take a deep breath and we begin our descent down the aisle.

As soon as I meet Eric's eyes I see that Edgar was right. Eric's reaction is like nothing I could have ever predicted as he struggles to keep his composure even though several rogue tears have already made their way out. He shakes his head as Peter claps him on his shoulder.

Edgar and I make it to the front of the aisle and Eric and I both are having a hard time keeping our composure. Zeke clears his throat and begins speaking.

"We are gathered here today to witness the joining in marriage of two people who are deeply in love, Eric Coulter and Tris Prior. Who presents this woman in marriage?" Zeke asks.

"Our father, Andrew Prior and mother Natalie Prior in spirit, and I do." Edgar calls out. He kisses my cheek before placing my hand in Eric's and taking his place beside Peter as one of Eric's two best men.

Eric is unbelievably handsome in his complete dress uniform, along with a red tie that matches our color scheme and surprisingly a crisp white shirt. Everything else he's wearing is black, and his wedding party is dressed in identical dress uniforms, except with black shirts and black ties, while Edgar and Peter have matching red ties.

I can feel Eric's nerves radiating off of him, as I'm sure he can feel my own. I reach up and wipe the last tear from his cheek and he turns and kisses the palm of my hand. Neither of us can stop smiling at the other.

"Marriage is a commitment that brings two spirits together as one. It's the ultimate symbol of ones love and devotion to another. Eric and Tris have opted to recite their own handwritten vows to each other. Eric." Zeke says.

Eric takes a deep breath and squeezes my hands. "Beatrice Elizabeth Prior, you intrigued me from the very moment you jumped first into the unknown. Your fierceness, bravery and strength captivated me, and your intelligence, selflessness and beauty made me fall in love with you. I fought to get your attention, I chased you relentlessly until I had your love and I will spend the rest of our lives showing you just how much you mean to me. We've been through more than most couples, but one thing that never changed is our love and commitment to each other. You are the one true love of my life, you are the reason I breathe and the motivation for me to be a better man. I've never loved anyone before you, and I will only love you and our children for the rest of our lives. I love you so much Tris."

I can't stop the steady flow of tears that trail down my face. I hear Chris whisper "Thank god for waterproof makeup."

Eric smiles as he wipes the tears from my cheeks before wiping his own.

"Eric James Coulter, from the moment I saw you I knew you were a force to be reckoned with. I admired your strength, your love of Dauntless and your commitment to making us the best soldiers we could be. It took us a long time to get here, but what started as conversations between a tattoo artist and a complicated leader blossomed into something more. Although there have been many attempts to keep me from you, and many tries to erase you from my memories my heart absolutely wouldn't forget you. I'd never been in love before you, and I've never loved anything in my life the way I love you. You are my everything, and no matter what life throws at us I know we will always find our way back to each other. You are my soulmate, the love of my life and the very reason I wake up every day. I am so in love with you." I choke the last few lines out, my voice blurring with tears.

Eric leans in and presses his lips to my tear soaked cheeks before kissing me briefly.

"Jumping the gun, aren't we Eric?" Zeke chuckles, causing the entire crowd to break out in laughter and whistles.

"We don't follow traditions very well." I reply and Christina snorts from next to me, making me laugh and Eric to also begin chuckling.

"I suppose I should hurry this along before they go any further. Do you, Eric James Coulter take Beatrice Elizabeth Prior to be your wife?"

"Damn right I do." Eric shouts, causing the crowd to get rowdy. He slips the silver and black wedding band on my finger.

"Do you, Beatrice Elizabeth Prior take Eric James Coulter to be your husband?" Zeke asks.

"Without a doubt." I reply with a huge smile. I slip his matching wedding band on his ring finger.

"With the power entrusted with me as your head Dauntless leader I now pronounce you husband and wife. Eric, go get her." Zeke smirks.

Eric crushes his lips to mine and we kiss hungrily not caring about the crowd or the noise around us. The shouts, cheers, whistles and laughter make this even more Dauntless. If we only have a few more nights in this faction, it's fitting that they are spent being as rowdy as possible.

Eric picks me up and I wrap my legs around him, never breaking our kiss. Zeke whistles from behind us, and the crowd hushes. Eric and I break apart, leaning our foreheads against one another.

"I'd like to be the first to introduce you to Mr. and Mrs. Eric Coulter." He shouts and the crowd goes absolutely wild. Eric tightens his grip on me and runs down the aisle with me still wrapped around his waist as people cheer for us. There's barely any time passed before the Pit is back in full party mode. Our wedding party take their turns congratulating us before heading back in to the crowd.

Eric and I sneak off to a small alcove off the Pit and he pulls me against him. "I've never seen anything as beautiful as you right now. You take my breath away." He says in a husky voice.

"You look so handsome baby. And your vows were perfect, why were you so nervous?" I ask.

"I suck at words." He chuckles and I playfully smack his chest. He leans in and kisses me passionately. I feel him picking me up beneath my thighs so I wrap my legs around him as our mouths work together. "I fucking love you my sexy wife." He growls.

"I fucking love you too my sexy husband." I moan against his lips as I feel his hand push the small lacy thong I'm wearing aside and his fingers enter me. "Eric, cameras." I whimper.

"Had Four loop the ones around the Pit." He whispers as he tries to unbuckle his pants without removing his hand from me. I help him slide his pants and boxer briefs down and I have barely touched him before he stops my hand. "Baby, I'm so fucking horny right now that if you touch me I'm going to lose it. I need you." He growls. Within seconds he's removed his fingers from my hot core and he's entered me roughly.

He trails the fingers he had inside of me across my lips and I shudder. He looks at me with lust before offering them to me. I greedily suck them into my mouth, earning a loud groan from Eric as he pounds hard inside of me.

"Fucking Christ... Tris..." he moans as I refuse to stop sucking on his fingers. I reach below my dress and rub my swollen bundle to push myself over the edge then I bring my slick fingers to his lips and he immediately sucks on them. He begins pulsing inside of me as he bites down on my fingers finishing with a load groan.

I lay my forehead on his shoulder and he presses his cheek to mine. We take some time to calm our racing heartbeats before we finally break apart. He carefully sets me back down on my feet and I straighten my dress as he gets dressed again. I run my hands over his shirt and jacket to smooth out any wrinkles as he leans in and kisses me softly.

"We seriously just had sex right outside the Pit. Who does that?" I giggle and Eric starts laughing with me.

"We also had sex just hours before our wedding. I'd say we're creating our own traditions." He replies with a smile.

"Two quickies in one day. It's not my best work, but it was hot as hell." I grin back.

"Every time with you is our best work. The fact that you're my wife now turns me on beyond belief. You have no idea how difficult it is for me to not throw you over my shoulder and lock you in our apartment for the foreseeable future." He almost growls as he says this and then he starts kissing my neck.

"I think that is a fabulous idea, however it'll have to wait until after the party since we _are_ the guests of honor." I reply with a smile and Eric grins back at me before kissing me again. He reaches his hand out to me and I happily take it.

We head back into the Pit and are immediately greeted by raucous applause and cheering. Eric looks over at me and smiles before scooping me up and carrying me into the room towards our waiting friends.


	31. Chapter 31

**AN: Happy holidays to you and yours. I thank you all for your follows, favorites and most of all the reviews. It's touching that you take the time out of your day to not only read my stories, but to share your thoughts with me as well. Thank you for being my constant motivation.**

Eric POV

I finally found a place where I can see without being seen, which is how I prefer to spend my time with large crowds of people. This started out as a wedding reception, but by the time we'd finished the traditional first dance it turned into a full on party at the Pit. Tris seems to be enjoying herself for the most part, but she's just as introverted as me and I've had to rescue her many times already from her well meaning, but absolutely crazy friends.

Tris escapes from the grasps of her drunken and over affectionate friends and makes her way back to me. Her cheeks are flushed, her smile is wide and she looks absolutely perfect.

"Why are you over here holding up this wall?" She asks.

"Just watching you." I grin before wrapping my arms around her.

"Everyone is wasted. It's kind of hilarious." She replies with a grin of her own.

"Indeed it is. People watching is always enjoyable during times like these."

I see Tris' expression change from amusement to almost shock and I follow her line of site to where Four and Edgar are huddled together talking. Their body language is relaxed and slightly affectionate as they have an animated conversation with each other.

"What's going on with them?" She turns to face me.

"I'm not sure." I reply. While there is more I could say based on my own observations during my bachelor party two nights ago, my answer is completely honest.

"They seem...more than friendly." She murmurs. I see Edgar's eyes flit over to Tris and he immediately whispers something to Tobias before the two begin walking our direction.

"Eric, Tris, congrats again on your marriage. You two are perfect for each other." Edgar says as he kisses his sisters cheek. Four shakes my hand and he sheepishly smiles at Tris.

"I should give you all some privacy." I say when I notice the look on Edgar's face.

"No, stay. I was going to wait to talk to you until after today, but I don't think it should wait any longer." Edgar says.

I have a feeling I know exactly what's about to happen, but based on the look on Tris' face she has no idea. I wrap my arms around her and she leans against me. Surprisingly, it's Four who begins speaking.

"Tris, I.. well...um... ok...so..." He stammers and then stops talking.

"What's going on?" She asks.

"So, during my initiation, I was involved with someone. Not sexually, um, you were my first with that, but um it was someone I was close to. I mean, more than friends... um..." Four continues to stammer.

"Asher." I finish for him and he gives me a look that's a cross between appreciation and fear.

Tris takes a deep breath in but says nothing. Edgar stands quietly next to Four.

"Yeah, Asher. Um, before he was made factionless, and obviously before he met Edgar." Four finishes.

"Ok..." Tris says.

"Tobias and I got to know each other when he started visiting Evelyn. He obviously went through an awful experience, as you both know now, but he and I were getting closer after Tris turned herself in. It just kept growing, especially once he was exonerated of all of the charges against him. We've both been trying to fight it, because of his past involvement with you, but it's something we'd like to pursue." Edgar explains.

"Ok..." Tris repeats.

"I don't want this to cause issues between us Tris. If you're not ok with it, we don't go any further." Edgar says.

"Ok, well, so you're gay?" Tris asks Four bluntly. "I'm sorry, I have to know you're not just toying with my brother's emotions because you're unsure of yourself."

"Bisexual. I wouldn't dare get involved with someone I care about if I was not completely sure of myself." Four replies.

"You are ok getting involved with him knowing of the history he and I have?" She asks Edgar.

"Yes, I know everything about him. I just need to be sure you're ok with it." Edgar replies.

"I'm perfectly fine with this. I'm a little surprised, only because I didn't know about Tobias' sexuality, but I'm fine. I love both of you, and I want you to be happy. If you've found happiness with each other why would you be willing to let it go?" She asks. You can see the relief wash over Four and Edgar, and Tris reaches out to hug each of them.

"I love you baby sis. Thank you for being so understanding." Edgar replies.

"You're amazing." Four adds before kissing her on her forehead. Edgar slips his hand in Four's and Tris smiles at them.

"Don't feel like you ever need to hide from me, ok?" She asks and the two nod.

"Congrats again. We love you both." Edgar says to us and I shake both of their hands before they disappear back into the crowd.

Tris turns to look at me. "You knew?"

"Which part?" I ask.

"Don't play innocent. Asher, and now them?" She asks.

"Asher, yes. They tried to hide it but I saw them kissing before he had to leave. It wasn't my place to ask him about it, and I surely didn't want to be the one who told you. It's not mine, or anyone else's place to out someone who's not ready for that. As for Edgar and him, no I didn't know. I suspected it during my bachelor party though." I shrug. "Are you mad?"

"Not at all. It actually explains some things in the relationship I had with him. If they're happy, I'm happy." She smiles and I gently kiss her lips.

"Four's right, you are amazing." I say quietly against her lips. I feel her smile before she gently licks my lips until I allow her entrance and slowly our tongues begin to work together. I back her against the wall and hold her there with my body pressed against hers as we deepen our kisses.

"Mr. Coulter, if I didn't know any better I'd think you were trying to seduce me right against this wall." She breathes out while I am kissing her neck and exposed shoulders.

"Mrs. Coulter, if I thought you'd actually allow me to do so I certainly would." I reply in between kisses. "I managed to snag this from behind the bar." I reach inside my jacket and pull out a bottle of whiskey. "I believe you still owe me a tattoo."

"With all of the ink I've put on your body how on earth do I owe you a tattoo?" She asks incredulously.

"I seem to recall that you refused to give me one right before the war." I reply with a smirk.

"You remember that?" She asks.

"Yeah, why?" I shrug.

"Do you remember anything else about that night?" She asks hopefully.

I shake my head at her and her face falls. She recovers quickly and plants a kiss on my lips before speaking again.

"Think anyone will miss us?" She asks while looking out at the rowdy crowd.

"Hell no. They're all either drunk or practically having sex in public. No one even knows why they're celebrating at this point." I reply with a laugh.

"Let's go then." She grins as she reaches for my hand.

We almost run to the tattoo shop and once we get inside she leads me to the back. She opens a locker and begins rummaging around, finally she tosses a pair of gym shorts and a tshirt to me while she grabs a pair of shorts and a tank for herself.

"Who's clothes are these?" I ask.

"Yours. You left random stuff here all the time. I would just throw whatever you left in the wash with my stuff and keep it here for you." She shrugs. "Can you untie me?" She asks as she turns her back to me.

I unlace her intricately tied dress and she finally can step out of it. I now see she's wearing a strapless lacy white bra along with her matching thong. I take her dress and carefully lay it across a chair. She steps out of her heels and pulls on her tiny shorts and tank top. She looks over her shoulder at me and quirks an eyebrow.

"You're so damn sexy." I grin at her eye roll as I continue to change my clothes.

"So what tattoo did you want?" Tris asks as she begins collecting some of the supplies she will need.

"It's something you said to me right before the first time you told me that you love me. I want the phrase 'we are each other's strength' and I want it on my ribs." I explain.

Tris stops what she's doing and smiles softly at me. She walks over to me and puts her hands on my cheeks, guiding my face towards her so she can capture my lips with her own. She kisses me deeply and I wrap my arms around her. When we break apart I lean my head on hers.

"You are everything I've dreamed you would be." I whisper to her and I hear her gasp.

"Say it again." She quietly commands.

"You are everything I've dreamed you would be." I repeat and when I lean away slightly I see the tears in her eyes. "Tris?"

She shakes her head and leans her forehead against my shoulder.

"Baby, what is it? What's wrong?" I ask.

"You've said that to me before." She whispers.

I realize whatever context I've said these words in our past is something special to Tris. I don't speak, instead I close my eyes and pull her closer and try to comfort her as she cries softly.

"We were in this room. Tris... we were in this exact room..." I am excited as the memories start flooding in. Tris leans back so she can look in my eyes. "It was after we kissed. I said that to you and we continued kissing. Fuck. It was our first kiss. I remember it Tris..."

I'm cut off when she crashes her lips to mine. She pulls back and whispers. "You remember."

"I do. You wanted it as much as I did and then your mind won out over your heart and you got so pissed at me. You pushed me away and yelled at me. But you fucking loved it." I smirk at her.

"God yes I did. I'd wanted that for weeks, but you were such an asshole to me when you were sober." She chuckles.

"You realize I was in love with you then, right?" I ask.

"You were?" She asks without masking her surprise.

"Yes. If this shit with Four hadn't of happened, the pill or whatever he gave me, I would have told you, I mean if you hadn't of freaked out on me that night I would have told you then. I didn't drink that night for a reason, I wanted to make sure whatever I had the balls to actually say to you was something you'd believe."

"Look at all those words you just used and I didn't even have to get you drunk." She smiles.

"And look at you giving me shit when I pour my heart out to you. You're a cold woman Mrs. Coulter." I playfully bite her shoulder as she swats my ass.

"Shirt off Coulter. I can't tattoo you with it on. And no whining about it hurting, you're the one who's decided to have it done there." She deadpans.

"Yes ma'am." I take my shirt off and follow her out of the back room.

I sit in the chair at her old station and watch her work. I remember these nights pretty well, sitting just like I am right now while I watched the way her body moved. Even though she removed the flower crown she wore during the wedding already, her hair is still hanging down loose in long curls. I watch as she pulls her hair up in a messy bun like she has so many nights before.

"What?" She asks when she catches me staring at her.

"Every night that you worked for months we did this. I sat right in this chair and watched every move you made. I knew exactly how your muscles flexed when you were tying your hair up, or how your legs looked when you were squatting to grab stuff from the bottom shelves. Oh and how much skin would show when you reached up for the higher shelves. I loved how your ass looked in those shorts too." I smirk and she has a faint blush on her cheeks. "I especially love how I can still make you blush even after all this time."

"I quite enjoyed tattooing you as well, even though we would argue a lot. You have always been my favorite canvas." She says as she traces her fingers across some of the many tattoos she's given me. "What script and color do you want?"

"I want you to freehand it so it's in your handwriting. Black ink is fine." I reply.

I watch her as she cleans my side. "Hey, can you pass me my whiskey?"

"Ask nicely." She grins at me. "Just turn on some of that charm that I know you're capable of and you'll get exactly what you want."

"I did get what I want." I reply with a smile. "I wanted you to be with me, and here we are."

"You're remembering." Tris says softly. She leans over and kisses me before passing me the whiskey. I take a long swig before passing it back to her. I watch as she does the same before starting my tattoo.

"It's weird. Ever since we've been back in this room it's coming back to me." I reply. I cringe as she gets to a sensitive spot near my rib.

"That happens with me sometimes too. It can be a place that brings back the memories, or a situation. It's mostly with you though. It seems like the memories that resonate with me the most all have to do with you." She replies as she's working. "Drink?" She asks and I nod. She takes a swig before passing it to me. I take a long drink and hand it back to her to put down.

"Have you remembered anything else?" I ask. I can see the slight change in her facial expression before she schools her features again.

"Some stuff, yeah." She replies vaguely without making eye contact.

"What stuff Tris?"

"Caleb." She says quietly. I reach my hand up and cup her cheek with it. She leans in and stops working for a moment.

"What about him?" I ask carefully.

"He helped her torture me, he thought he killed me and didn't care, I also remembered the conversation I had with him the night before his execution. He wasn't my brother anymore. I don't think he ever loved anyone the way he loved himself." She replies.

"I think you're right, but his actions aren't a reflection of you." I remind her and she nods.

"I know." She sighs.

"What else?" I ask.

"I've had memories that were of you and me and they were just awful. I know I should have talked to you about them, but I didn't know how you'd react. I talked to Peter, and he helped me to understand that I was remembering the sims that Jeanine put me through, and that they weren't actual memories of you and me." She replies carefully.

I stop to think before replying, because my initial reaction is anger that she hid this from me. I need to understand that she has Abnegation traits ingrained in her, and she didnt tell me because she didn't want to hurt me.

"I'm glad you talked to someone, but I want you to know you can talk to me about anything. Even the stuff you don't think I want to hear, ok?"

"I know. I just needed to understand what the memory was." She replies hesitantly.

"I'd never hurt you."

"I know that in my heart Eric, I really do. My memories just get scrambled, and sometimes it's hard for me to know what is an actual event I'm remembering and what is a dream or sim I'm remembering. It's frustrating for me, and I don't want to hurt you or our relationship with my attempts to figure it all out." She replies.

"Tris, we are partners in everything. Baby, we are married now, and I didn't go into this blindly. I know you are struggling with your memories, and I know some of the things that you do end up remembering aren't going to be pleasant or pretty. I'm here for all of them, the good and the bad. You and I have had one serious fight, that's it. We may have had disagreements along the way, but outside of that fight we have always been solid. So, when you have memories of _anything_ I want us to be able to talk about them together, ok?"

"Ok. I can do that." She replies. I can tell from the look in her eyes that she is being honest with me. I begin to relax a bit and she takes a drink before passing it to me.

We have a few quiet moments as she begins working again. I tuck a loose strand of hair behind her ear before speaking again.

"I still can't believe how many times you've beaten that serum." I remark. "It's amazing to me. I mean you and Four both keep beating serums. I think it's smart that we're leaving the city Tris, the two of you will always have targets on your back."

"Do you think there's really something out there Eric?" She asks.

"I do. I've seen some of the older maps and there were so many cities out there just like Chicago. Tris, we're going to find something out there. We're going to get answers as to why people sat back and watched Jeanine, Evelyn and Marcus try to destroy us. We're going to have a life where we are just normal people Tris. We can enjoy being married and have kids and build a house and get a freaking dog and shit."

Tris sits her gun down and takes a drink. I grab the bottle and take a sip of my own.

"You got real quiet." I say as I idly run my fingertips up and down one of her long legs.

"Sorry, I just was thinking about what you said." She replies.

"You're gonna have to be more specific love. I've said a lot tonight, I've been using my words." I grin.

"You've talked about us having kids quite a few times, and we've been taking our chances knowing there's a possibility of the serum not working. Do you think it's a good idea for us to take the chance of getting pregnant when we're about to head out into the unknown?" She asks quietly.

"If we get pregnant and we haven't found what we need outside the wall we can come back here." I reply.

"Eric, when we have a child together it's almost certain our child will be divergent too. Or, possibly like me..." She doesn't continue because of her emotions taking over.

"You're afraid of being here when that happens." I finish for her.

"Yes. Being divergent here has been extremely dangerous for us." She replies.

"Tris, we are going to be ok. I will not let anything happen to you or our children. I don't care what it takes, no one will ever get to you again. I promise you this, no matter where we are, I will protect you. We can't live the rest of our lives in fear."

She looks at me with those intense hazel eyes, but finally there are no tears. She looks strong and fierce. She looks like my Tris, the warrior I fell in love with.

"Ok." She says with a smile.

I tug on her shirt to get her to bend over towards me and I capture her lips with my own once she's close enough. When we break apart we both just stare at each other for several moments before she blushes and looks away.

"You did some tattoos back when you were an initiate, right?" Tris asks.

"Nice deflection, Mrs. Coulter." I smirk. "Yeah I can hold my own, why?"

"Because you're going to give me a tattoo when I'm finished here." She smirks back at me. I raise my eyebrow at her.

"What kind of tattoo?" I ask.

"I want the same quote as you, same spot." She replies nonchalantly as she picks up her gun to continue.

"I can do that. I can definitely do that." I smile and I can see Tris holding back her own smile.

I watch her closely while she works, the way her brows furrow when she concentrates and the way she chews on her bottom lip when she's thinking.

"You're staring again." She says without missing a beat.

"I can't help it. You're beautiful and you're finally mine."

"Flattery will get you nowhere with me Coulter." She grins.

I laugh loudly at her comment and she sets her tattoo gun down and gives me one final wipe across my ribs.

"You're done." She says. "Go check it out."

I stand up and walk over to her full length mirror and look at the reflection. The tattoo is perfect, and not only is it my wife's own words but also her own handwriting.

"It's perfect." I say and Tris comes up behind me and wraps her arms around me. "Are you ready for yours?"

"Yeah." She says as she cleans up her station. We work together to get everything ready.

"Shirt off Coulter. You know I can't tattoo you with it on. What's that other rule, no whining right?" I ask. Tris sticks her tongue out at me and I smack her ass.

Tris takes her shirt off and lays on her side. Something about seeing her in her tiny shorts and her strapless lace bra is sexier than hell and I can feel my body reacting to her.

I graze my lips down her side and watch the goosebumps that rise in their wake.

"What are you doing?" Tris asks.

"Admiring..." I reply as I kiss her shoulder.

"You're very distracting." She replies breathily.

"It's not a distraction if I'm seducing my wife." I kiss down her neck and tilt her head so I can capture her lips.

"There are cameras in here." She whispers.

"Also on a loop." I whisper back. She jerks her head at me.

"You planned this?" She asks, narrowing her eyes at me.

"I had Four loop cameras in some places, well outside the Pit and both the front and back rooms of the tattoo shop. Just in case."

"You totally planned this." She grins.

"I wanted to be sure we had options." I unhook her bra while kissing down her back. I can hear it fall softly to the floor as Tris turns so she's lying on her back.

"I like options." She picks up her hips so I can slide her shorts and thong down her legs.

I kiss her hip bone, then across her flat abdomen to her other hip. I can feel her running her fingers through my gelled hair.

"Gonna mess up my do." I chuckle.

"Good." She replies.

"Do you have any idea at all how many times I dreamed about doing this?"

"Tell me." She says.

"I fantasized about you all the time anyway, but when the two of us were in this room together it was hard not to act on the desire I had for you." I spread her legs apart and kiss the inside of her thigh. "Having an intellectual conversation with you turned me on so fucking much. That, along with the way we flirted with each other, and your mannerisms would have me so damn horny." I move to her other thigh and kiss the inside of it as well. "I would go home those nights and fantasize about the things I would do to you if ever given the chance."

"Like what?" Tris whispers.

"Like spreading your beautiful, naked body across your tattoo chair and having my wicked way with you." I slowly drag my finger through her wet folds. "What noises you would make the first time I touched you here." I gently feather my fingers across her swollen bundle of nerves and she whimpers. "I wanted to know how warm you were when you were turned on. I wanted to know how wet you were when it was just the two of us here alone. I wanted to know how you tasted."

I spread her lower lips and run my tongue through her folds, taking my time exploring her fully. I gently lick around her clit before wrapping my lips around it and sucking. Tris moans softly and bucks her hips up towards me.

"I would think about how it would feel to slide my fingers into you." I slowly insert two fingers into her wet heat while swirling my tongue around her clit.

"Oh Eric..." she whispers.

"I wanted to know how you tasted when you came in my mouth. I wanted to hear you moan my name as I made you cum. I would think about these things while I stroked myself baby. I would think about you as I came." I move back down to her warm core and pump my fingers in and out of her wet center as I concentrate my mouth solely on her overly stimulated nerves. She's moving her hips towards me and pulling my head closer as she repeatedly calls my name.

"I'm almost..." She moans before I feel her walls clamp down on my fingers. She's pulsing around me while moving herself against my mouth. I don't move away from her until she's ridden out her orgasm, and I slowly remove my fingers to collect my reward. I watch her as I suck my fingers, savoring her taste as long as I can.

Tris' face is flushed and her body is sensitive to my touch. She rolls off the chair slowly and she stands naked in front of me. She tugs my tshirt over my head and kisses down my chest as she pushes my shorts and boxers down my legs.

"Now it's my turn to live out a fantasy." She brings the chair back up to a slightly reclined position and pushes me towards it. I sit down and Tris straddles my lap. At this angle I can easily reach her breasts, and I waste no time taking a nipple into my mouth. "There were nights where you sat just like this, shirtless while I worked on the details of your willow tree and the flames off of it. I would wonder what it'd be like to strip you completely." As she talks she's slowly stroking my cock. "You see, I knew that I turned you on Eric, I could see the evidence sometimes when you would wear shorts like you were just wearing. I'd see that bulge and wonder what you would feel like in my hand. I wanted to know how you would react the first time I touched you. Or if you'd like it when I rubbed against you." She's grinding herself against me and all I can feel is my cock slipping through her incredibly warm and wet folds.

"My god you feel so good against me." I whisper.

"I wanted to look into your eyes the first time I took you inside of me." She whispers as her hazel eyes meet mine. Her eyes are intense, like they were many of the previous nights we shared together in this room, and for the first time I now realize that she wanted me just as badly back then as I wanted her. Tris holds me in her hand as she lines herself with me, and keeps eye contact as she slowly sinks down on me, taking every inch I can give her. She stills herself and I can feel her flexing around me. "I wanted so badly to know how it would feel when our bodies were finally joined as one. I needed you to stretch me to my limit and fill me like no one has before." She slowly lifts herself till she's almost off of me, then sinks back down at an agonizing pace. "I wanted to feel your fingers digging into my hips, and I wanted to hear you begging me to keep going." She slowly begins to ride me and I grasp her hips and help guide her up and down my length.

"Keep talking to me baby." I moan.

"I would think about how good you would feel inside of me, and when I'd get home at night I'd think of you when I touched myself. I would wonder if you ever thought of me the same way." She increases her pace and I move my hips in time with hers.

"I thought of you all the time." I whisper breathily.

"I would think of you when I was with him..." She looks me in the eyes as she says that and I can see her nerves for the first time. I lean up and press our bodies together and kiss her hungrily.

"The only way I could cum with anyone else was to pretend they were you." I tell her as I look her in the eyes. She closes her eyes as our bodies slide together perfectly. "Open your eyes, I want to see you. Tris you feel so damn good." I moan.

"I've wanted you like this for as long as I can remember." She says breathily. "Eric I'm gonna..."

She pulses hard around me as she goes from moaning to yelling my name. Her walls clench down on me hard, pulling my own release from me well before I was ready for this to end. I throw my head back and yell out her name as she rides me harder than ever before. She's still pulsing around me as I spill inside of her and finally she falls against me. She kisses my shoulder before moving back to my mouth and our tongues dance together as both of us begin to come down from our highs.

We sit together, neither of us willing to separate from the other. Tris has her face buried in my neck and I trace her spine with my fingers. The loud bass from the Pit reverberates around the room, but inside the only thing I can hear is the sound of our breathing.

"This supersedes any fantasy I've ever had about you." She finally says. "I've never..." she stops talking and I feel her shaking her head against my neck.

"You've never what?" I prompt her to continue.

"Talked...while...um, during..." she stutters.

"Neither have I. Tris, it was so hot."

"I was a little embarrassed by what I said." She admits.

"Why?" I ask.

"I didn't know how you'd take hearing about me with...him. I felt like I shouldn't have said that..." she trails off.

"You told me you thought of me when you were with him. Maybe that would bother some people but for me it was fucking hot. Did it bother you when I said what I did?"

"No. I heard those women talk about their experiences with you, and it was superficial at best. They bragged about your size and stamina, but when they described the act itself it was completely meaningless. Even our first time together was special, to me at least, and that was without us being in a relationship at all. I could tell by listening to them that you didn't give a damn about them or their pleasure at all. So, between hearing that from them, and you admitting that you had to think of me to get off, it actually makes me feel pretty damn special." She chuckles at the last part.

"You are everything. I think our first time was special to both of us because even if we hadn't admitted it, and even though neither of us could remember it we were in love. You were never going to be a one time thing for me."

"Nor would you have been for me." She replies as she kisses my neck and underside of my jaw.

We sit together in silence for a few minutes before Tris reluctantly moves off of me. She washes up in the sink and I do the same. We both get mostly dressed and I finally begin Tris' tattoo.

"I will never give you shit about tattoo placement again." Tris says as she cringes when I hit a sensitive spot.

"Almost done. Do you need a break?"

"Yeah...sorry." She replies.

"Don't be, it's fine." I set the gun down and hand her the whiskey. She takes a long sip and closes her eyes.

"I'm going to miss this place." She says quietly.

"Me too." I agree. "We may have started here, and for that I'm grateful, but I know we'll have regrets if we don't at least try to see what else is out there."

"You're right." She sighs.

"You know I'm filing that away." I smirk and she laughs.

"Did you ever think we'd get here?" She asks before taking a drink.

"You know what, I actually did. Tori got me to freely admit that you were my endgame during a conversation she and I had in Candor. I think subconsciously I always knew that we were going to be here one day, but the two of us are entirely too stubborn to just let shit happen naturally."

"It's fitting that we're spending our wedding night like this." She smiles.

"Full circle. We fell in love over whiskey and tattoos." I grin back at her.

"Ok, let's get this finished before we both are too drunk to function." Tris says as she hops back onto the tattoo chair and settles on her side.

Even though I know how painful this tattoo is due to its close proximity to her ribs I also know she's happy to be getting it. This tattoo we're sharing, and the context of the words and intimacy behind it is important to both of us. Sure we exchanged rings and conveyed our devotion and commitment to each other today in front of the entire faction with our spoken vows, but this is different. These words represent the moment in our life when everything changed, when we finally were able to admit our love to each other. These words, and their true meaning had been expressed over and over throughout everything the two of us have been through.

We are truly each other's strength, and when we finally venture outside that wall we will definitely need it.


	32. Chapter 32

**AN: Hope everyone had a great holiday, thanks again for all your support for this story. Enjoy!**

Eric POV

Goodbyes aren't easy for Tris and she has spent the better part of our journey with rogue tears slipping down her cheeks. I currently have her wrapped in my arms as we ride in the back of a large truck across extremely bumpy terrain. We made it outside of the wall without much opposition since Zeke had cleared the way by running interference on one of the gate crews. Once we made it outside the wall, our group walked for maybe an hour before being approached by two large trucks, and we were introduced to several individuals dressed in military fatigues who seemed to know exactly who we are and offered to bring us to their home base.

I look around at our group and find different reactions and moods. Tori, Bud, Peter, George and Amar are involved in an animated conversation and all seem rather relaxed. Uriah is doing his best to cheer up an apprehensive Marlene. Edgar and Four seem on edge, both of their naturally suspicious personalities causing worry while Tris just clings to me like she's afraid I will disappear right under her nose.

"Hey, talk to me." I say, loud enough to carry over the noise of the truck, but low enough that hopefully only Tris can hear me.

"These people know us and we just willingly jumped into a truck with them while we trust them to take us to wherever the hell it is they came from. Look around Eric, there's nothing out here for as far as we can see." She replies.

"Tris, they obviously came from somewhere where they are well taken care of. They're clean, wearing uniforms, they have technology and vehicles and they look nothing like the factionless we've dealt with before. There's something out there." I try to reassure her.

"How are you so calm? You usually worry enough for both of us, and here you sit cool as a cucumber." Tris laments.

"You had to reach pretty far in the memory bank for that antiquated analogy. If memory serves me correctly, that phrase probably hasn't been used since before the original war." I retort.

"I love it when you talk nerdy to me." She replies with a grin.

"Oh really? Well in that case, let me tell you a story about a handsome young boy growing up in Erudite. One of his favorite things to do was read, and he would often sneak away from the other kids in school just to get some quiet time to himself. Words in print energized him, and sometimes he would read a book in one sitting because he was too enthralled in the tale to put it down. He started to read history books, and he learned everything he could about what life was like before the original war. He began to wonder if there was something more than the walled off city he called home, and even though he knew he would leave his faction when he was of age, he also wanted to one day leave the city as well. The unknown always fascinated him, and he spent his life trying to find a way to break free from the restrictive chains that held him in place."

I notice that Tris is playing with the wedding band on my finger, but she's finally stopped crying. "So, what did this incredibly intelligent young man learn in his reading endeavors?" She asks with a hint of the humor I love in her voice.

"He learned that there were many cities out there, some as big as Chicago, some even bigger. The hub of the country was a city called New York, which also was enclosed in a state of the same name. Apparently, people from all over the world would pass through New York in pursuit of living in this country as a citizen." I reply.

"If you could live in any prewar city from the ones you've studied which one would it be?" She asks.

"There are these huge bodies of water out there Tris, they call them oceans. I've seen old pictures of people living on the shore by these oceans and that's what I want to do. Can you imagine how great that would be when we have kids? Our backyard would be our own personal oasis."

"That actually sounds perfect. I've never seen anything like what you describe, but I can imagine it when I close my eyes." She smiles.

The truck slows to a stop, and we all gather to look out the lone window in the back of the vehicle. The doors are thrown open and we see several people walking out of a large building towards us.

I get out first and help Tris out, and we turn to help the others jump down from the truck. We stick close together as a middle aged couple approaches us.

"Hello everyone, my name is Roxanne Jiminez and this is my partner David Gerard, we'd like to welcome you all to the city of Milwaukee."

"Milwaukee?" Tori repeats.

"Yes, Milwaukee Wisconsin, this is our largest of the experimental post war cities, and it's been quite prosperous as you may be able to tell. Who might you be?" David asks.

"Don't you already know? You've been watching us for years, haven't you?" Tori replies angrily.

David takes a deep breath before continuing. "Indeed, we have watched, but not for the reasons you all may believe. I'm certainly no voyeur, so please if you wouldn't mind introducing yourselves I'd much appreciate it."

"I'm Tori Anders this is my husband Bud Anders. This is my brother George Wu and his husband Amar Wu. This is Uriah Pedrad and his girlfriend Marlene Wood. This is Peter Hayes, Edgar Matthews and…." Tori trails off, looking at Four for an answer.

"My name's actually Tobias Eaton, but I prefer to be called Four. Its a name I took in order to forget where I came from." Four explains.

David and Roxanne shake hands with each person before turning their attention to us. Roxanne begins to speak again.

"We do know exactly who the two of you are: Eric Coulter and Tris Prior, heroes of the war and uprising." She says with a smile.

"It's Tris Coulter now, we're married." Tris says quietly. I squeeze her hand and she looks over at me with a small smile.

"Married?" David asks with a hint of surprise. He quickly masks his reaction and offers a tight smile.

"Yes, married. Is there a problem?" I ask.

"Oh no, of course not, we just hadn't been made aware of your nuptials. I suppose congratulations are in order." He replies.

"Of course they are David." Roxanne quickly says from next to him. She smiles warmly at Tris and me before continuing. "Please forgive David, had he been born in your city I'm sure he would have been Candor. If you would, do follow me."

We follow behind, and I'm vaguely listening to Roxanne describe the city and surroundings. Tris is paying rapt attention, hanging on their every word. I look around and see tall, glass walled buildings, along with many restaurants, retail stores and other shops. It's like Dauntless, except brighter and under a sunny sky.

I'm brought out of my thoughts by Uriah speaking. "What exactly is a hotel?" He asks.

"Oh, I'm sorry; I forget that there are many modern amenities that you aren't aware of. A hotel is a temporary residence; a room is usually rented by the day or week, and often used when traveling. It's not a typical permanent residence." Roxanne explains. "We have rooms for each of you, or however you'd like to split them. It's somewhere safe and clean for you to stay while you get your bearings outside of your previous city."

David walks closer to Roxanne and speaks so only she can hear him. I watch her face closely, and I can tell she isn't necessarily pleased with what David is saying however it seems as if he may outrank her in whatever government system they are running. She nods tersely at him before smiling back at us.

"Ok, here we are. How many rooms will you all need?" She asks brightly.

"Five." Peter answers and Roxanne nods.

"I'll be right back." She replies before hurrying towards a desk.

"What will we be doing today?" Marlene asks David.

"We don't have a strict schedule; however there are some things we'd like to get you acclimated to our society and to answer any questions you may have. We will get you settled in your rooms, and I'll have clothes and other necessities brought in for you. Today, we just want you to get familiar with your surroundings and try to relax a bit." David replies, before turning his attention to Tris. "Ms. Prior, we do need to meet with you today."

"My last name is Coulter, and why do you need to meet with me specifically?" Tris asks defensively. Her grip on my hand tightens.

"There are things we need to discuss privately." He answers vaguely.

"Not happening. If my wife decides she wants to meet with you, I'll be with her. That is non-negotiable." I reply.

David narrows his eyes slightly at me. "Mr. Coulter, Eric, I don't mean to alarm you. There's no need to worry about Ms. Prior, err, Mrs. Coulter. I can assure you no harm will come to her." David replies smoothly.

"You've watched our city; you know exactly what she's been subjected to…." I begin but Tris interrupts me.

"Whatever you have to say to me will be said in front of my husband. You heard him, it's non-negotiable. If you want me, he comes too. This shouldn't be terribly difficult for you to understand." Tris replies angrily.

"My apologies, Tris and Eric, I shouldn't have overstepped. Of course he can accompany you on any business we have. That will not be a problem at all." David says with a forced smile.

Roxanne approaches our group and attempts to break some of the tension. "We have rooms, all together on the same hall and floor. You'll all be neighbors!" She says with exaggerated enthusiasm. "Follow me please." She says and we follow her to the elevator.

Once she's shown us to our rooms our group disperses into their separate rooms. David asks if he can accompany Tris and me to our room and we reluctantly let him in.

"I know you've just arrived and are likely tired from your travels, but there is somewhere I need to take you both. I wouldn't press if it wasn't important." David says.

Tris sighs wearily but nods her head at me.

"Fine, let's get this over with, she's exhausted." I reply and David nods.

We follow him back to the elevator and we notice he presses a button for one of the upper floors. Tris winds her arms around my waist and rests her head on my shoulder. I can feel the tension radiating off of her, and I hold her close and press kisses to her forehead. Once we reach our designated floor, we follow David off the elevator and down a hallway. This looks similar to the rest of the hotel, however it appears these are apartments instead of temporary residences.

We stop in front of a door numbered 2311 and David rings the bell. I thread my hand with Tris' and she squeezes as we wait. The door opens and an older woman with light brown hair and hazel eyes appears. I can feel Tris falling and I react quickly to scoop her up in my arms.

"Tris, baby…" I say and I can tell she's in some sort of shock.

"No, no, no, no, no I can't do this again!" She wails.

"Bring her inside; come with me you can lay her on the couch." The woman says as she rushes inside the apartment. I try to lay Tris on the couch but she clutches to me.

"This isn't real." She says as she begins to cry.

"Love, what's wrong?" I ask as I sit on the couch and wrap my arms around her. "Hey, this is real, we are real. What's triggering you?"

Tris continues to sob with her face buried in the crook of my neck while David and this mystery woman have a heated conversation behind me.

"Can one of you tell me what the fuck is going on?" I yell.

"Eric, we can explain…." David says carefully, not allowing the woman to speak.

I hear a door open down the hallway of the apartment and a man walks into the living room. I can feel the blood drain from my face, and I put my hand on Tris' head to keep her from looking up. Unfortunately, I was too late and I feel her pass out in my arms. I stand up, cradling her in my arms and make my way to the front door.

"Eric, wait!" David calls out. "Please, let us explain."

"We're going back to our room. Do NOT follow me." I growl as I open the front door and make my way out.

"Eric!" I hear a shout from behind me and I stop walking, I turn around and am face to face with the man who was in the apartment with us, the man I recognized as my presumed dead father in law. "She's my daughter, please let me take care of her."

"She's my wife, and you have no idea what she's been through to put her in this state. I need to go. I'll be in touch if and when she's ready to see either of you."

"Can I at least come with you? Please." He pleads.

"Fine, but keep your distance." I reply as I hurry towards the elevator.

We ride in silence back to our floor, and once we're inside the room I lay Tris on the couch and I move to sit with her head resting in my lap. Her father brings a blanket into the room and gently drapes it over her before taking a seat in the chair across from me.

"Does this happen often?" He asks quietly.

"Confusion about what is reality, yes. To the extreme of her passing out, no." I reply. "How are you here?"

"It's a long story, would you settle for the condensed version for now? I'd like to be able to tell Beatrice when she's up for it." He replies. I nod my head and he continues. "Natalie grew up outside the fence and she was placed in Chicago by David's father. She was only supposed to stay for two years, long enough to do some research on the city; however she and I met and fell in love. We married, had Caleb and Beatrice and she refused to return here. When the war started, they sent in a rescue team for us. They were supposed to rescue the children too, but they said it was too dangerous to extract them. We've been here ever since, and apparently they faked our deaths to avoid detection." He explains.

"How could you let them leave her there? Do you have any idea what Jeanine did to her? What Evelyn did? What her own fucking brother did?" I seethe.

"Caleb?" He asks with a shocked expression.

"Yes, Caleb. He was a war criminal, and he's been executed for his many crimes, one of which was the kidnapping, torture and attempted murder of his sister." I reply.

"Dear god." He visibly pales.

"Your daughter had to fire the fatal shot at his execution." I reply and he shakes his head. I can see the tears in his eyes, and I make an attempt to rein my temper in.

"I had no idea. They sheltered us from what was going on inside the wall. We were simply told that Caleb, Beatrice and Edgar were accounted for." He looks up sharply then shakes his head. "You don't know Edgar."

"I do know him. He's here too." I reply. Andrew looks up at me with a shocked expression.

Tris begins to stir and I gesture for Andrew to leave the room, he quickly goes into the bathroom and shuts the door.

"Hey baby." She whispers. "I'm sorry."

"Why are you sorry? Come here." I reply as she sits up and moves to my lap. I wrap my arms around her and she rests her head on my shoulder.

"I saw my parents." She says quietly. "It seemed so real."

"Tris, it was real." I reply carefully and she looks at me.

"What? No. How? No…" She shakes her head.

"Deep breaths baby, in through your nose and out through your mouth." I reply and the two of us breathe in sync until she's calmed down.

"How?" She asks.

"Your dad is here, he's in our bathroom. Do you want to see him, or do you want me to ask him to leave?" I ask.

"I want to see him." She replies, scooting off of my lap. I walk to the bathroom door and knock, Andrew quickly opens the door and I gesture for him to go over to Tris.

I stand back when Andrew approaches Tris, who quickly jumps off the couch and throws her arms around her father. The two embrace for several minutes before sitting down side by side on the couch.

"I know you want answers, and I'll be sure to provide them. Would you like to see your mother?" He asks.

"Yes." She answers. "Edgar too, please, he needs to hear this."

"Of course, I will go find them." He replies. Andrew moves to stand up and I stop him.

"Stay here, I'll go get them." I say and Andrew nods his head and mouths the words 'thank you'.

"Will you be ok?" I ask Tris and she nods at me. She stands up and embraces me.

"Hurry back." She whispers.

I quickly slip out the door and walk over to the room that Edgar and Four are sharing. I knock and Four answers the door, stepping aside to invite me in.

"I need you to come with me." I say to Edgar. He stands up.

"Is something wrong with Tris?" He asks as he slips his shoes on.

"I'll explain on the way. You need to come too number boy; he will need your support." I call over my shoulder as I head towards the door.

"Where are we going?" Edgar asks when he notices we pass my room and go to the elevator.

"Twenty third floor." I reply without looking at him.

The elevator ride is quiet, and Edgar and Four silently follow me to the door of the Prior apartment. I knock sharply and the door is once again opened by the same woman as before, only this time I know it is Natalie Prior.

"Holy shit." Four says from behind me.

"Hello Tobias." She replies.

"I thought…. I mean I…. How?" He stutters.

"You weren't in control of yourself, and as for the how it's a long story that I will share once we're all together. Have you come to take me to Beatrice?" She asks.

"Yes, please come with me." I reply. Edgar stands frozen in place, clearly in shock. I watch as Four takes his hand and begins to quietly talk to him.

"You probably don't remember me." Natalie says to Edgar as we begin to walk towards the elevator.

"I actually do." He says quietly.

"I'm glad you and Beatrice found each other again." She replies as she hugs Edgar.

We make it back to my room and once we're inside the emotional nature of this reunion hits in full force. There are tears, then smiles, then laughs and more tears as the siblings reunite with their parents. Andrew and Natalie explain that the first sixteen years of Natalie's life was spent in Milwaukee, when she was tasked to try to gather information on a failing experiment in Chicago. There were rumors of a hostile situation that was being headed by several members of faction leadership. Natalie's assignment was to gather information in Dauntless, where the source of some rumors had started, as well as make a contact within Erudite to gather information there as well. Andrew's friendship with her was unexpected, as was the two falling in love, and Natalie decided to completely ignore her assignment and chose to live a life with the man she had fallen in love with.

Andrew and Natalie protected her secret, and Natalie soon found out that Andrew was also a plant from Milwaukee, as his mother Edith was one of the senior leaders of the other experimental city. Their choice to remain in Chicago was first met with resistance, but soon they realized that Andrew's positive influence in the government, along with his shared child with one of the main perpetrators Jeanine Matthews may be enough to prevent the unease that was bubbling in the city. Things were going well up until the Prior's youngest child began exhibiting signs of divergence at a very young age. Soon, Jeanine realized that not only was Beatrice Prior a divergent, but she may be the key to the mysterious box that she knew Andrew had in his possession.

Jeanine became obsessed with Beatrice, and with doing whatever it took to obtain the information locked inside of the box that was in the Prior's possession. She tried, unsuccessfully, to negotiate with Marcus Eaton to find a way to bring Beatrice to Erudite for testing. Marcus refused, and he knew exactly how valuable Beatrice was to Jeanine he chose to use it to his advantage. Marcus promised that once Beatrice chose Abnegation on her choosing day that he would put her in a position that worked directly with Jeanine. Beatrice shocked everyone when she chose Dauntless, and continued to make waves when she shed her meek Abnegation Beatrice persona and became the formidable Dauntless woman Tris.

"We aren't sure what happened to Beatrice once she was in Dauntless. We were prevented from contacting her by Max." Andrew explains.

I begin filling the Prior's in on Tris' activity in Dauntless. I explain that once Tris was in Dauntless, Jeanine tasked me with watching her, knowing that she could control me by protecting the secret of my Divergence. I had already been failing at bringing any divergent to Jeanine as commanded, and Jeanine was beginning to tire of my insolence. When she pushed me to capture Tris, she unknowingly started a chain of events that neither Tris nor I expected, which was the two of us developing feelings for each other. Instead of me becoming Jeanine's most trusted follower, I worked against her and began devising my own plan to stop her war and to destroy Erudite in the process. I give a brief overview of everything that Tris was put through in the quest to use her divergence for testing. Finally I explain how the two of us managed to fall in love, despite everything that was stacked against us.

"So the two of you are married?" Natalie asks hesitantly.

"Yes, we were recently married, right before we chose to leave the city." Tris answers. "We were already engaged; we just decided we didn't want to take off into the unknown without being married first."

"I can't believe I missed my daughter's wedding." Natalie replies quietly. "They didn't even tell us you were getting married, and I'm sure David knew."

"He seemed quite surprised when we told him we were married." I reply.

"That's interesting. He always seemed to know what Beatrice was doing. He took a special interest in her." Andrew adds.

"That's not creepy at all." Edgar quips, causing us to laugh.

"How did you know to leave the city?" Natalie asks.

"I opened the box." Tris replies quietly.

"You… you were the one?" Andrew replies in awe.

"Oh my word, you did? What did they do to you my sweet girl? " Natalie asks.

Tris shakes her head almost violently and I wrap her in my arms again. She moves so she's sitting in my lap and winds her arms tightly around my torso, resting her head against my shoulder.

"We can't talk about that tonight; she's nowhere near ready to relive that. I will say this much, both she and Four were put through pure hell in an effort for Marcus Eaton, Evelyn Eaton and Jeanine Matthews to gain access to that box. If either of them chooses to speak about what they endured, it'll be on their terms and only when they are ready." I explain firmly. The Priors both nod in agreement, and their sympathy is clearly showing in their facial expressions.

"Why me? I don't want this. I don't want to be special, or different or unique. I want to blend in; I just want my life and my family. I want my husband, and our future kids and our house and dog. I don't understand why I can't just be left alone." Tris says and her voice breaks on the last sentence. I wrap my arms tightly around her and kiss her hair as she leans into me.

"That's what we're going to do Tris, live a normal life." I whisper to her and she nods against me.

"Why does he want to meet with me? Was it just to bring me to you or is it something more?" Tris asks.

"We're not sure." Andrew answers. "He didn't even tell us you were here. We found out when he brought you to our apartment."

"Can he be trusted?" I ask.

"Yes." Andrew answers without hesitation. I glance over at my in-laws and see the two of them whispering to each other. I feel uneasy but I push the thought aside and concentrate on my wife. My paranoia needs to wait because right now she needs my full attention. Tris shifts against me and I can tell she's angry.

"How could the two of you allow him to let us believe you were dead? Please don't try to make me understand whatever top secret mission was going on over here that led to your rescue, make me understand how the two of you as my parents didn't make any attempt to reach out to me, or to Edgar or even to your traitorous son Caleb to let us know you were alive?" Tris asks angrily.

"David told us he had let Caleb know." Natalie answers quietly.

"When?" Tris shouts. "I'm sorry." She adds.

"It's fine Beatrice, we certainly understand your anger. Caleb was informed within days of our rescue." Andrew answers.

"He knew. He fucking knew the whole time. He let me believe you were dead." Tris sobs against my chest.

Natalie cautiously approaches Tris and places her hand on her daughters back. Tris ducks away, moving as close as possible to me and holding on to me as tightly as possible.

"This is too much for her. I'm sorry, but for now I need to ask you all to leave. We can pick this up once she's feeling better." I announce and everyone rises and heads to the door.

"Beatrice, would you like to come with your father and me?" Natalie asks in a gentle voice.

"No." Tris croaks out. "I can't do this right now. Please go."

Natalie backs away and looks at me. "Take good care of her."

"I will, you have my word." I reply and watch as they all exit our room.

Tris and I sit in silence with our arms still clutched tightly around each other. I look down at her and she's neither crying nor sleeping, instead just staring off in to space.

"What's going through your mind right now?" I ask her quietly.

"Can we go to bed? We're both exhausted, and I just can't talk about this tonight. Please?" She asks.

"Of course we can. Come on."

We decide to take a quick shower together and then get into bed. We don't talk anymore, instead we wrap our bodies around each other and I lay quietly until I'm positive she's finally asleep before finally surrendering to my own exhaustion.

The next morning I'm woken by a restless Tris. I plant a kiss on the top of her head.

"Hey baby." I whisper and I feel her sigh against me.

"Go back to sleep. It's early and I'm sorry for waking you." She replies.

"Talk to me, please." I reply.

"Everything seems to be a lie." She says. Her voice is void of emotion.

"Not everything baby. Not us. No matter how crazy this gets we are good." I reply. "Tris, we don't have to do anything you don't want to do, ok? I don't give a fuck about this David person, or this city we're in, I care about you. If we need to leave here and keep going we will. I will follow you anywhere."

"This isn't just about me Eric. It's about us. It's our family, well my fucked up family at least." Tris replies.

"They're my fucked up family too. I think that was part of the whole marriage package we signed up for. Although, I may require more of your wonderful affections to endure this family I inherited." I chuckle and finally I hear her laughter.

"You are ridiculous." She says between laughs.

"I mean, come on now, my brother in law is dating my wife's ex, who also happens to be the least tolerable person I've ever met. My dead in laws are actually alive, and the jury's still out on whether or not they will even like me, shit the last time your dad saw me I was working side by side with Max and Jeanine. They're probably staging some sort of intervention as we speak to get you away from me. We are the definition of a fucked up family." I lament while Tris laughs heartily during my little speech.

We lie together laughing, finally catching our breath and loosening our grip on each other.

"I really love you." Tris says as she kisses the underside of my jaw.

"I'm glad, because if I have had to put up with all these damn Prior's and you don't even love me then I'm outta here." I retort and she smacks my chest.

"You are such an idiot." She replies with a chuckle.

"You married me, so who's the bigger idiot here?" I ask.

"Good point." She agrees and I lean in and kiss her while trailing my fingers up and down her back.

Tris kisses down my chest, pausing to tug on my nipple rings with her teeth, which she knows makes me instantly horny. Her hands are working further down my body when we hear a sharp knocking on our door.

"Ignore it." I breathe as she begins stroking my already throbbing erection.

She takes her hands off of me long enough for adjust her position and then she wraps her warm mouth around my length.

"Oh fuck..." I moan. The knocks on our door continue, along with a muffled voice on the other side. Tris continues to work her mouth on me as I struggle to keep from bucking my hips against her.

There's another knock on the door and this time whoever it is slides an envelope under the door and they seem to have finally walked away.

"Tris, baby, I want to be inside of you when I cum. Please." I plead and she slowly moves away from me.

I watch as she moves and straddles me, inching herself down on my cock. I'm unable to restrain myself from bucking towards her and burying myself to the hilt.

"Eric... yes." She moans breathily as we quickly develop a rhythm where I meet her each time she lowers onto me. I can feel myself getting closer and closer to the edge and I adjust my angle so I am able to hit a spot inside of her that I know will set her off. "Oh shit." She moans as I repeatedly thrust up inside of her. I finally hold her hips in place as I continue my hard and fast pounding.

"Tris... I know you're close. Cum for me baby." I breathe.

"Eric... God yes... fuck... Eric..." She begins yelling my name as I pound into her hard. I can feel her muscles begin to clench me and she's screaming my name as she trembles above me.

"Tris..." I yell, repeating her name as I finally let go, spilling inside of her in spurts as I try to ride out my orgasm while her walls continue to pulse and twitch around me.

She slumps down against me and I wrap my arms around her. We're both covered in sweat and breathing hard. My tablet begins beeping from the nightstand and Tris reaches around me to grab it. I look down at the screen and start laughing.

"What?" She asks.

"Apparently the walls are pretty thin, and our neighbors on one side are your brother and Four and on the other side is Peter. I have messages from Peter congratulating me on making you scream my name and one from Four telling me I'm lucky we're married because it's saving your brother from murdering me right now." I laugh.

"When we find a place to settle down let's make sure we aren't sharing walls with anyone." Tris chuckles.

"I'm going to soundproof our bedroom just in case." I reply with a smirk and she laughs again.

"Considering we don't always make it to the bedroom you might just want to do the whole house." She smirks.

"Good point." I reply before kissing her again. She sighs happily against my lips before leaning back.

"Thank you." She says with a smile. I quirk my eyebrows at her and she gently runs her fingers across the light beard I've grown. "Thank you for being you and for helping me through all the craziness. I don't know what I would do without you Eric."

"You'll never have to know. I'm here for life Tris."

Tris grins as she moves off of my lap and walks over to grab the envelope that had been shoved under our door. She opens it and removes a piece of paper, and I watch her facial expression change as she reads over it.

My tablet beeps again indicating a new message and it's from Edgar.

 _We need to talk, without Tris and Tobias._

 _How do you suggest we do that?_ I reply _._

 _Meet me in fifteen minutes in the coffee shop off of the lobby. Just find a way, it's important._

 _OK_. I reply.

I look over at Tris. "What was in the envelope?" I ask.

"An invitation to a dinner party tonight." She shrugs. "I'm going to take a shower, care to join me?"

I know Edgar said fifteen minutes, but he'll have to wait. I'm never going to turn down a shower with my wife. I grin at her as I follow her into our bathroom.


	33. Chapter 33

**AN: I appreciate all of the continued love and support for my story. Your reviews and follows mean everything! A special thank you to Lunaschild2016 who's been my sounding board on more than one occasion as I work on my stories, thanks for keeping me sane! Hope y'all enjoy the new chapter.**

Eric POV

I make my way down to the coffee shop that Edgar asked me to meet at and see an obviously agitated Edgar sitting at a booth scrolling through something on his tablet.

"Did you forget how to tell time?" He bites out without looking at me as I sit down across from him. "I purposely waited until I no longer heard the two of you shouting each other's name before I even messaged you." He finally looks up, and while I can see he's frustrated I can also see the humor in his expression.

"Sorry, I'm a newlywed. Don't expect me to turn down sex followed by a shower with my wife. Or sex while in a shower with my wife." I smirk and he shakes his head.

"She's still my sister and although I'm quite aware that the two of you have a healthy sex life I'd like to live in denial and not have to acknowledge it out loud at all." He sighs. "Anyway, Tobias met with a woman last night, the type of meeting that he had to sneak out and make excuses for."

I arch my eyebrows at Edgar. "He's cheating?"

"Jesus Eric, way to jump to conclusions, no, he's not cheating but this woman Nita is putting feelers out to see if she can trust him. She claims that David is not who he is trying to make us believe he is, and she says he has some pretty big plans for Chicago." Edgar explains.

"Did Four tell you this?" I ask.

"No, I followed him when he snuck out." Edgar shrugs. I glare at him. "What?"

"You jump down _my_ throat when I assume the worst, and yet you followed your boyfriend because you also assumed something." I explain and he smiles.

"Point taken, look I'm on edge about this place and everyone in it. Tobias has yet to tell me about this Nita woman, so yeah I'm a little pissed that he feels the need to sneak around behind my back. It's what he did to my sister when he started meeting with Evelyn." Edgar explains.

"Ok, so what did she say David's plans were?" I ask.

"She was vague, like I said she's trying to figure out if she can trust Tobias or not. I don't know who this woman is, other than she claims to work for David, so I'd like to see what we can find out about her." Edgar suggests.

"Good idea. Did you get invited to this dinner party tonight? Maybe she'll be there." I reply.

Edgar nods. "I think we all did, and she will be there too, she already mentioned that to Tobias."

"Ok, but I have to ask, why am I hiding this from my wife?"

"Because for starters she mentioned that both Tobias and Tris are very important to whatever David is doing, she called them genetically pure and she seemed surprised that either of them were born and raised in Chicago. Whatever Chicago really is to the people here, it was apparent from her explanation to Tobias that whatever he and Tris are shouldn't have been possible as a product of that city." Edgar explains.

"What do you mean 'whatever they are'? Four is a person, one whom you seem to care a great deal for. Tris is my wife, your sister and she is not some abomination! What the hell Edgar?" I reply angrily.

"Hey, sorry you know I didn't mean anything by it. I know she's a person, and believe me I don't want her to keep being treated like some sort of science experiment, nor do I want them to put Tobias through anything else. The two of them have been through hell and back. That's why I am talking to you. I'd like to be able to figure this out without alarming her. She's been through so much already, and if she thinks she's being singled out again after getting away from that bullshit in Chicago I'm afraid of what it'll do to her." Edgar says.

"Understandable, but I can't and won't keep this from her for long. I'm willing to wait until we can get more information from this Nita person, but if there's even a remote chance that someone will be coming after Tris again I'm not going to just sit around and just wait for it to happen. There are no secrets between your sister and me."

"There's more." Edgar says carefully. "The main reason we need to keep this from Tris is because Nita alluded that my father and Natalie are involved."

"What?" I gape at him.

"I don't know any more than you do Eric. All I know is what I overheard her telling Tobias." He replies.

"Did she seem believable?" I ask. He shrugs his shoulders.

"I don't know what to think or believe at this point. If nothing else these past few months have taught us we can trust almost no one. We'll get answers tonight and go from there." Edgar agrees.

"Are you going to talk to Four about it?" I ask.

Edgar looks uncomfortable and if he's debating on how to answer me. While I usually back off when it comes to matters of other people's relationships, I'm not this time. Four is easily influenced, and his lapse in judgment with his mother almost cost him both his and Tris' life. I'm not taking any chances.

"I don't know if I should. Will he think I don't trust him?" He asks.

"Do you trust him?" I counter.

"I'm trying to here. I knew what I was getting in to when he and I became involved. I watched what he did to Tris, although at the time I didn't know he was hiding his involvement with his mother from anyone, especially not my sister. But, after learning everything there is to know about his past I chose to give him a chance. He worries me when he starts getting secretive and hiding things though." Edgar replies.

"Look, I usually keep my mouth shut when it comes to other people's relationships, but you're my family and Tris would kick my ass if I buried my head in the sand when it comes to you. I think you should talk to him. If you have doubts creeping in it'll only get worse until you do." I reply.

He nods and sighs. "You're right." I grin at him and sit back against the booth, crossing my arms. "Why do you look so damn smug?"

"I love those two words. You should teach your sister to say them more often." I reply and he shakes his head.

"You have a death wish." He laughs. "Seriously though, how is she?"

"Do you want to know how she really is, or how she wants everyone to believe she is?" I ask.

"You know the answer to that." Edgar answers evenly.

"She's struggling. Finding her parents here, leaving the city, all of it. Her parents want answers and Tris is nowhere near stable enough to relive the hell she's been through. Tris wants answers from her parents too, I'm sure you do too; I mean how do they hide who they really are for your whole life?" I ask.

"Yeah, it's been one hell of a shock." Edgar agrees quietly. He takes a sip of his coffee, and I can sense he wants to say more.

"What aren't you saying right now?" I ask.

"My mother knew." He finally says.

"She knew that they came from outside of the wall? How?" I ask.

"My father confided in her when they were involved. You see, they did truly love each other, but my mother couldn't fight the evil that was inside of her. She was beyond redemption." Edgar explains. "When he met Natalie it was one of those love at first sight things you hear about in books and movies. My mother was already on her way to becoming tyrannical, but his rejection certainly pushed her over the edge. She knew about the box he'd smuggled out of the city, and she made it her life's mission to get the information from inside it." He explains. "I sometimes wonder if she could have been a different person if she had of lived through the war. I mean, my dad abandoned her, and then I did the same thing. What if there was something redeemable in her?"

I shift uncomfortably in my chair and Edgar trains his eyes on me. He looks so much like Tris right now that it's almost unnerving.

"Edgar, you know how she died right?" I ask.

"Yeah, shot during the war." He replies.

"Do you know who shot her?" I ask.

"No, it's one of those subjects I've successfully avoided. Please tell me it wasn't Tobias. I had a hard enough time coming to terms with things when I thought he was responsible for my father's death." He looks at me and shakes his head. "It was him, wasn't it?"

"Edgar no, he had nothing to do with it. I shot her. I'm the one who killed her." I admit.

"Longest coffee trip ever and you always say it's me that gets distracted anytime I run an errand." Tris says as she sits next to me in the booth and kisses my cheek. She looks between her brother and me and she furrows her eyebrows. "What did I walk in on here?"

"Did she know?" Edgar asks me without looking at Tris.

"Did I know what?" Tris asks.

"Nothing, we should head back up. Did you want to grab a coffee first?" I ask.

"What is going on here? Why do the two of you look like you want to murder each other? What's wrong?" Tris asks.

Edgar lets out a dry chuckle. "Ironic, only one of us at this table is a murderer. Did you know you had married a murderer, sis?"

Tris gapes at Edgar. "What are you talking about?"

"He murdered my mother."

"It's not that simple Edgar and you know it." Tris replies.

"It is that simple. He just told me he shot her. He murdered her." Edgar argues.

"He killed the woman who single handedly started a war and genocide. He killed the woman whose plan was to use my divergence to open that damn box and then to order him to kill me when she was done, the same woman you fled from because you feared what she would do to you once she found out you were divergent too. Edgar, I know she was your mother, but you've told me repeatedly that she deserved to die for her crimes. Plus you have no clue at all what she did to him. Why are you angry that it was Eric who pulled the trigger?" Tris asks.

"Because he wasn't her judge and jury! She never had a chance to go on trial! What could we have learned about her had she gone under truth serum?" He yells.

Tris opens her mouth to speak and I place my hand on hers. She glances over at me and I shake my head. She frowns at me, but wraps her hand around mine and squeezes.

"You're right Edgar. She didn't have a chance to explain herself. I know you needed to hear it, and I'm sorry that my actions denied you. You deserved to hear her truth." I say. "She had my entire family murdered because I didn't follow her instructions Edgar. I found out the morning of Tris' rescue."

Edgar sighs and he looks up at Tris, who is still glaring at him. He then turns his attention to me. "I had no idea she had your family murdered. I can understand why you reacted the way you did, especially when you had to witness what she was doing to the woman you love. I'm being unreasonable. "

"I'd rather you talk to me about, or even yell at me about it than to hold it in and let it eat you alive. I don't expect you to not react to hearing that I'm the one who pulled the trigger, and I don't expect you to be numb to the fact that she's dead because of my actions." I reply. "I live with regrets every day."

Tris turns and looks at me, silently questioning me with her eyes. I thread our fingers together and speak again. "I reacted that day. I've told Tris this before; my team had a plan to take Erudite down. I learned that morning that my family had been murdered, and that it was per Jeanine's orders. Instead of me following the plan, I stormed in and wanted to get my revenge. I did kill her, because of what she did to my family, because of what she was doing to Tris, because of the hell she put me through due to my own divergence, and because of what she planned on doing to the city. My actions led to a complete meltdown inside of Erudite, and when I came face to face with Max and he pulled a gun on Tris I shot him point blank without hesitation. Because of my actions, Erudite was left intact and Evelyn was able to continue what Jeanine started. My actions caused so much more torture and suffering."

"Stop." Edgar commands. "Your actions stopped a war and the subsequent uprising. Your actions saved her," he gestures his head towards Tris, "and likely Tobias too. Your actions saved so many innocent divergents. I do wish I had some answers from my mother, but I have no right to be angry at you. Eric, you did what was necessary to stop the war. You saved her life. Jeanine would have killed her, and if she didn't succeed she had issued orders to her team to make sure Tris didn't live through it. If you're trying to find some way to justify your actions look right beside you. Look in front of you. We're family now, and if you hadn't stopped Jeanine we wouldn't have been. I'm sorry for my outburst earlier; I reacted without thinking, which seems to run in our family." He finishes with a smirk.

Tris leans her head on my shoulder and I immediately put my arm around her and lean my head on hers.

"I didn't get the invite for breakfast and coffee." Four quips as he plops down next to Edgar.

"Totally unplanned, Eric came down to get us coffee and ran into my brother and the two sat down here and talked long enough for me to finally come searching." Tris replies.

"She just wanted her caffeine, don't let her fool you." I add.

"I can relate." Four replies. "Is everything ok? You all seem stressed."

"Deep conversation, everything is good now though." Edgar replies while offering a small smile to Four. He leans in and pecks him on the lips and the two seem a little less tense.

"I'm glad you're all here, there's actually something I need to talk to all of you about…." Four says, but we are interrupted by David and another man approaching our table.

"Good morning. Did you all sleep well?" David asks.

"Yes, thanks again for the living arrangements." Edgar replies evenly. I notice yet another of his shared mannerisms with Tris, they have the exact same facial expression and tone of voice when they're frustrated.

"You're most welcome. Pardon my interruption but I'd like to introduce you to Matthew Parker, he's in charge of testing and development. Matthew this is Edgar, Eric, Tobias and Tris."

"Hello, it's great to finally meet you all. I'd actually love to steal Tobias and Tris for a bit. There's some testing I'd like to do…"

"Absolutely not." I reply emphatically. "No more testing, they've been through enough."

"Eric, I'm sorry for not being clear, this isn't just testing for Tobias and Tris, and it's actually for all members of your group. We've already tested Peter, Uriah, Marlene, Tori and Bud. We just have all of you and Amar and George to finish. You see, our city was founded based on genetic research, and everyone who lives here goes through the very basics of genetic testing. What you have known your whole life as divergence is actually part of one's genetic makeup." Matthew explains. "I promise you its quick and pain free, just some simple blood draws."

"We're not going anywhere with you right now and I'll need time to discuss this with my husband before I give you any answers." Tris replies.

"Husband?" Matthew asks with confusion marked on his face.

"My _husband_ is Eric. You've watched us our whole lives and you all still can't figure out that I'm married to him?" Tris spits.

"I'm sorry, what?" Matthew stutters.

"Matthew, we should give these folks some time. Come along now, let them finish their breakfast." David says quickly. He grabs Matthew's arm and begins dragging him away from the table.

"Wait." Edgar says. "You're the second person to seem utterly shocked that my sister and brother in law are married. Why is that?"

"Well, because we don't have any type of marriage license on file for them." Matthew replies. David's face darkens behind him.

"What Matthew is trying to say is we were all unaware of your nuptials." David adds.

"How is it that you have a staff watching us around night the clock and yet you have no idea we were married? We had our ceremony in the Pit at Dauntless, where I know for a fact had a multitude of cameras." I say.

"Having a ceremony is one thing, being legally married is another." Matthew retorts. "Do you not realize that without a legally binding marriage license the ceremony you had was just for show?"

"What?" I yell. Others in the coffee shop turn to look at us.

"Eric, we should probably discuss this in private." David says quietly. "Perhaps you can come by while Tobias and Tris are testing."

"Bullshit. I've already told you that I go where she goes, and right now we are all going with you to your office so you can explain why the fuck our marriage isn't legal." I growl.

"Certainly Eric, please follow me." David replies.

Our group walks behind David and Matthew in silence, and Tris' firm grip on my hand never falters. I can't get a read on what she's thinking or feeling at the moment, and that worries me.

"Please, have a seat." David gestures to the two large couches in his expansive office. The glass walls offer a panoramic view of the city and surrounding areas. David and Matthew settle in matching chairs while Tris and I sit on one couch and Edgar and Four on the other.

"Your city, Chicago, was in fact separated from the rest of the United States." David begins. Seeing the confusion on some faces, he continues. "Let me back track a bit. The United States is our country, which is formed by fifty separate states. There are levels of government, starting at the lowest levels which are city laws, then state laws and finally federal laws that are blanketed over the country. Chicago is part of the state of Illinois, however when the war destroyed almost the entire country small settlements began to crop up, and Chicago was the first. You see, Chicago doesn't fall under any federal or state government, nor are the laws of the city recognized outside of it. The marriage that took place between Eric and Tris, while legal in the city of Chicago is not recognized outside."

"We're not married?" Tris asks while her resolve is finally breaking. I wrap my arms around her and she moves to my lap and settles with her back against my chest.

"Legally, no, and I understand this news may come as a shock to you. Anything that is bound by law in Chicago isn't recognized outside its walls. I know this is hard to understand, and we are here to answer any questions we can. We also have a full legal team on staff if we need further explanations." David offers.

"How do we legally get married here? Who can do that?" I ask.

"I'm afraid it isn't that simple. You aren't citizens of our country; therefore you'd have to gain citizenship first before being able to marry." David answers.

"This is bullshit." I scoff and Tris pulls my arms tighter around herself.

"In my heart, we are married. If we decide we want to stay outside of the wall we can go through the proper channels to become citizens and to have a legal marriage, ok?" Tris says to me.

I catch the look that David and Matthew share and my stomach drops a bit. I have a feeling that for some reason they don't want Tris and I to be married, or maybe even together, and I need to know why. I wonder if this Nita woman could shed some light on this subject. I catch Edgar's eyes and I can almost guarantee he's thinking the same thing.

"Eric, if you'd like to learn more about citizenship and what you'd need to do I'd be happy to call in our legal team. Perhaps we could discuss this while Matthew takes Tobias and Tris to the lab." David offers as he picks up the phone next to him.

"Not a chance. I've told you before that I go where she goes. Don't push me." I growl.

David sighs. "Eric, I'm not trying to cause any waves here, but I do think that Tris is capable of speaking for herself and making her own decisions."

Tris leans forward slightly from her spot on my lap. "David, you are absolutely right, and I am perfectly capable of speaking for myself and making my own decisions. Let me make it clear, my husband will accompany me for anything I choose to do. I'm not sure I even want to participate in whatever testing you've suggested, so he and I will discuss this and let you know."

David tries, and fails, to school his features after hearing Tris' answer. He quickly shifts gears. "Are you all coming to our dinner party this evening?"

"We wouldn't miss it." Edgar answers smoothly. Four glances over at him but says nothing.

"Do you and your husband need to discuss this too?" David asks Tris with his sarcasm thinly veiled. He's challenging Tris and she can rarely back down when this happens.

"We will be there." She answers firmly.

"We should get going. Thanks for the talk David." Edgar says as he stands up. Four gives him a strange look, but he stands with him. Tris and I stand with them and David keeps talking as he walks us to the door.

"Please feel free to come by any time, I'll be happy to answer any questions you may have." He offers as we exit his office with Matthew hot on our heels.

"Hey, would you all want a tour of the lab? No pressure for testing, but it will at least give you an idea of what we do here." He offers brightly.

"Yeah, I would." Four replies. I watch as he grabs Edgar's hand and squeezes and Edgar nods his head once.

"I'll go too." Edgar adds.

"Tris?" I ask as I glance over at her.

"Yeah, let's do this." She replies.

We follow Matthew through many hallways until we get to a doorway that requires a retina scan along with a handprint read. Matthew punches a code in, goes through the scans and then holds the heavy door open for us to enter.

"Welcome to my home away from home." He smiles as he leads us into the lab.

We enter into a hallway that is mostly glass, with many different rooms to the left and right; Matthew stops in front of us and turns to face us.

"We have many different labs here, some of which are strictly for medical testing. These first few labs are just that – where we run your standard, run of the mill medical screenings. Illness checking, blood tests, pregnancy, you name it we do it. Oh, that reminds me Tris weren't you under strict instructions to have bloodwork done at least weekly to check your serum levels and to ensure there are no negative results from the mutated memory serum you were given?" Matthew asks.

"What? How do you know that? Isn't anything private with you people?" Tris asks angrily.

"Oh wow, I'm sorry. I thought since the four of you were family it wouldn't be an issue to discuss this. My sincerest apologies, I don't mean to upset you." He replies.

"It's not a matter of discussing these things in front of my family; it's the fact that you know any of this. It's a huge invasion of my privacy." She replies.

"I know this is a lot to take in and I'm very sorry for that. We watched many of you, but Tris and Tobias in particular. You two are something special." Matthew replies.

"How so?" Four asks.

"The way the two of you are unaffected long term by almost every serum is fascinating. Also, the way the two of you are able to discern fiction from reality in the simulations you were put under is simply unheard of. I know where you're from you were considered an anomaly, which could very well be true, but here it's celebrated. It's an indication that you are genetically pure." Matthew smiles as he explains.

I glance over at Edgar and find his eyes already on me. This is a phrase that he overheard Nita use during her secret meeting with Four.

"What does genetically pure mean?" Tris asks.

"It means that you have no damaged genes. It's unheard of. Everyone is damaged, even the ones your city called divergents. Those divergents were less damaged than a non-divergent, but to be genetically pure is simply something we've only dreamed of seeing." He replies. "That's why David has been pressing to get Tris and Tobias tested." He directs that comment towards me.

"Matthew, since it's obvious you've watched her for a while you of all people should know what she's been through. What happens if you prove her to be this genetically pure thing you keep going on about? Then what? More tests? Does she become a lab rat? An exhibit? When will it stop? She's a person, dammit, she's my wife. We want to have kids one day; will she ever be able to do so without someone wanting our child too? When does she just get to be herself?" I finally stop speaking when I feel Tris' arms wind around my waist.

For a second I can see Matthew's cheerful façade fade, and he types a quick message out on his phone before slipping back into the pocket of his lab coat. We are joined by a woman who looks to be around our age with long curly dark hair and a olive complexion. I can see Four staring at the woman, and soon my curiosity is peaked when Matthew starts to speak.

"Oh, this is my lab partner Juanita…." He begins.

"It's just Nita. For some reason Matthew and David insist on using my full name." She says with an eye roll.

"Sorry, everyone this is Nita. Nita, this is Four, Edgar, Eric and Tris." Matthew says as he points to each of us.

"It's nice to meet you. I'm just here to help with the tour." She smiles.

We follow the two through different labs, and both Nita and Matthew point out different testing equipment and labs along the way. I stop when I see a large room with sketches of some sort of machinery all over, along with blueprints and what looks like metal parts scattered throughout.

"That doesn't look very genetic." I remark. Matthew turns toward me with a smile.

"You'd be correct. Not everything is based on genes here. That's the prototype for one of our new helicopters." He says.

"Helicopter?" Edgar asks as he moves closer to the window.

"Indeed. A vehicle that travels by air." Matthew adds. "Want to see?"

"Damn right I want to see." I reply, intrigued by this air vehicle.

We follow Matthew into the small room and he immediately picks up what looks like a toy.

"This is our working prototype. Obviously it's not built to scale, but it proves that it has the engineering to fly. You see, air travel always was one of the primary methods of long distance transport in the United States. The devastation of wars, along with the degradation of our genes caused research and development to slowly taper away. You see, genetic purity can effect every aspect of a person. The smartest people are the least damaged, this has been proven by our research. So, the genetic pure people are brilliant."

"You hear that babe, scientific proof that you're smarter than me." I say as I turn to look for Tris. All I see is Edgar.

"Tris?" I call out as I walk back to the hallway. There's no sign of her anywhere.

"Hey, don't worry, they split off and went with Nita. It's fine, we'd have to do it anyway because as you can see some of our labs are incredibly small." Matthew offers.

"You did this on purpose. You wanted to separate us..." I begin.

"She's with Tobias. They're with Nita." Edgar says firmly with a pleading look in his eyes. "I'm sure they're fine. Besides, Tris could probably use a break from the testosterone for a bit."

He must think that Nita took them aside to speak more about her theories on David. It makes sense, since I've noticed there are cameras pretty much in all public places.

"Yeah, you're probably right." I reply nervously. "So when will you have a working one of these things?"

Matthew's grin widens. "Oh this is just the upgrade, we already have helicopters. Would you want to go up? We have one that will fit the three of us."

"Well, we should wait for Tris and Four." I reply.

"Tobias won't go near one of those things. He's afraid of heights remember?" Edgar replies. I can tell he's chomping at the bit to go up.

"Fuck it, let's do it. Just promise me we can take Tris up too later." I reply.

"Of course, right this way." Matthew says and we follow him excitedly.

The helicopter in person is a thing of beauty and both Edgar and Matthew are watching me with great interest. It's not a large machine, but to me it's majestic with its smooth lines and gleaming metal. The side doors are open, and I watch as another man approaches us.

"Matthew, care to introduce us?" The man says. He's wearing coveralls and holding a helmet with one arm.

"Sure. These are some of our friends from Chicago, Eric Coulter and Edgar Matthews. Eric, Edgar this is Jermaine Walls. Jermaine is one of the best pilots in the country, and we are fortunate to have his talents in our city." Matthew explains.

I shake Jermaine's outstretched hand and Edgar does the same. We follow him to a small storage cabinet and he pulls out helmets and headsets for the three of us.

"This way." Jermaine says as we follow him to the helicopter. I climb in the front next to Jermaine while Edgar and Matthew climb into the back.

I watch in awe as he flips switches and presses buttons to bring the bird to life. He speaks to us through his microphone and explains each step along the way. Before long we feel the helicopter being lifted from the ground and within minutes we are in flight. I can't even think of the appropriate words to form as I stare out the window and watch as the ground gets further and further away.

"I'm going to do a simple circle of the city. From this vantage point you can see more of what our city can offer you." He says and I nod without looking at him. I can't tear my eyes away from the view.

The highest building I'd ever been in was the Hancock building where we would zipline. While it afforded a nice view of the city, it pales in comparison to what we watch unfold below us as Jermaine expertly maneuvers the helicopter.

"Where you're currently staying is considered our city center, or downtown as many still refer to it. The city spreads out around it, and as you can see it's not as developed as the center."

He refers to the sporadic singular houses below. Some have an air of abandonment while others have vehicles parked close to them and some signs of life surrounded them.

"Many families choose to settle out here in the outskirts of the city. As you can see land is expansive, allowing those with children some freedoms to spread out a bit. Do either of you have children?" Jermaine asks.

"No, not yet." Edgar answers.

"My wife and I are planning to have children soon." I reply. Admitting that out loud brings a sense of warmth to me and inside I admit that I'm hoping that pregnancy prevention serum doesn't continue to work as expected. "Do you have kids?" I ask.

"I do. My wife and I have six children. Our oldest Malcolm is sixteen, Jerome is fourteen, Toya is eleven, Chantal is ten, Talia is eight and our most recent addition was a bit of a surprise, our baby boy Tyson is seven months." He replies. He nods towards some pictures he has taped in the cockpit. I see a family shot of him, his wife and all six children, along with more candid shots of the kids in everyday life. This is what I want one day.

"You must be proud." I reply as I look over the pictures.

"I am. Stella and I married young and started our family immediately but it's been a blessing every day." He easily replies. "You said you were married, for how long?"

"We are newlyweds. We married right before we left the city, so it's been less than a month." I reply.

"How'd you two meet?" He asks.

"She was a tattoo artist in our city. I was one of the government leaders. We'd known each other for awhile but we weren't exactly friendly. I started visiting her exclusively for my tattoos and it grew from there." I reply, smiling when I think of how Tris and I first started.

"Wait, you are _that_ couple?" Jermaine asks.

I furrow my brows at him and he glances at me momentarily. He gestures his eyes towards the back where Edgar and Matthew are involved in their own conversation.

"They can't hear us right now, and we can't hear them. It's not unusual for us to have separate conversations and then open the mics for group speak." He explains.

"What do you mean by _that_ couple?" I ask.

"You two have fans, my wife included. The whole star crossed lovers path that you took got a lot of people invested in your story. You wouldn't believe how many people were rooting for you to win the girl from Four, man I think there was actual cheering the first night the two of you finally kissed in the tattoo shop." He replies with a laugh.

"That's creepy as hell to know our most private conversations were being broadcast." I reply angrily.

"Man, I know. None of us in the city knew you were being broadcast without knowledge. We all assumed that the citizens of Chicago signed up to have their life recorded as a reality show." He replies. "Your wedding was a thing of beauty though. I'm man enough to admit that. It was a special event."

"Wait, you saw our wedding?" I ask.

"Eric, the whole country saw your wedding. From what I understand it was the highest rated television event in recent history. People adore a good love story and you and Tris delivered on all fronts." He replies. "Did I say something wrong?" He asks while glancing at me.

"David, he seemed extremely surprised that we were married. Matthew did too." I reply.

"I don't know why, they both saw it too. I can't imagine why they would be surprised." He shakes his head. "How are your inlaws handling it? They didn't seem to be too pleased when they watched the wedding. I don't want to overstep, it's just an observation."

"They watched it too?" I ask trying hard to keep the disbelief from my voice.

"Yeah they did, they had a front row seat at the large viewing party my wife and I attended. Eric, I'm not kidding when I say your wedding was the talk of the town. People still talk about her dress too. She looked beautiful, you're a lucky man. Don't stress her parents, Stella's parents thought we were young and stupid and they didn't approve. Seventeen years later we prove them wrong every day."

I'm not ready to tip my hand to Jermaine no matter how nice he seems. We talk more about the wedding in general terms and then he returns to the tour.

I listen half heartedly, and I am aware that Matthew and Edgar have joined the conversation too. All I can concentrate on is the words Edgar spoke during breakfast this morning when he said that Nita insinuated Tris' parents are involved in something with David. Whatever this is, it can't be good, and all I can think of right now is getting back to Tris.


	34. Chapter 34

**AN: Thanks as always for the reviews, follows and love. Enjoy!**

Tris POV

We follow Nita in relative silence through the narrow corridors and through several small labs. Tobias places his hand on the small of my back as we continue to walk behind Nita.

"I need you both to act like this conversation is completely about the lab." She says quietly as she gestures to something through the glass wall. "I'm going to lead you two out of here and we need to go back to one of your rooms. The hotel rooms and private residences don't have cameras or audio." She whispers as she gestures to another machine.

We follow her through several hallways, pausing to look at different things she's pointed out until finally she gets us out of the lab and we've walked back to the hotel. We continue our forced conversation until we finally make it back to Four's room.

"What is going on?" I ask as soon as the door is shut.

"I shouldn't stay here too long to avoid drawing suspicion, but there are things you two need to know. I'm taking a chance and trusting the two of you." She states.

"We can be trusted. Please, just tell us what you know. We have no idea what we've gotten ourselves in to." Four replies.

"The war that Jeanine waged to get that box opened was initiated by David. He was a puppet master pulling strings. He needed proof that there were GP's in your city, and only a specific GP would have ever been able to open that box. He seemed to know that Tris was a GP and he would tell that to anyone who would listen. He was right and it was proven when you opened that box." She glances at me before continuing. "David now suspects that Four is a GP as well and he plans on using both of you to find a way to purify the genes of those of us he considers to be damaged."

"What is all of this genetic pure and damaged bullshit? You make it sound like our entire city was just some big science experiment that everyone was waiting to fail or blow up in someone's face. I thought it was just some voyeuristic television show." I say angrily.

"Tris that is exactly what your city is, it's a science experiment for the government being disguised as a television show so that there's no public outcry about what's really going on there. The US government is making money off of Chicago, and what David just told you all about the city being a separate entity is a complete lie. Chicago was built as a place to hold the worst of the genetically damaged or the GD as we call them, until a cure could be found. You see, while each one of us has a different level of damage, there are no longer any genetically pure people. Many years of reproduction between the generations who were once GP with the GD have caused these divergents as your city called them. You have to understand, everyone is divergent, and to not have any of the genetic traits or disposition of divergence is proof of a person who is one hundred percent GD. While your city celebrated those, the rest of the country sought to destroy them. The wall was built to physically keep the GD's in place, and the government of your city was in place to use fear and manipulation to keep people from trying to venture outside of the wall." Nita explains.

"So, let me get this straight, Eric and I are legally married, and I'm supposedly somehow genetically pure?" I ask warily.

"Yes, you and Eric are definitely married. Anything that happens in Chicago is covered under the same federal laws as the rest of the cities in our country. As for being GP, there's no supposedly about it, you _are_ GP. Only a GP could have opened that box, and we suspect that Four is also GP as well, however we'd need to test him further to be sure. David already wants to get you away from Eric Tris, but you two need to understand that if Four is proven to also be GP David will do everything in his power to ensure that you and Eric are apart. He doesn't want the two of you to attempt to reproduce. Since Eric isn't GP if you were to get pregnant with his child everything your body would share with that child could taint your genetic pureness. It's an unexplained phenomenon, but it's happened repeatedly and this is why there are no longer any GP's around." Nita explains.

"There's absolutely no fucking way. Eric is my husband, does David think he can run a couple of tests and somehow talk me into leaving him? What the hell kind of sick operation are you running here?" I fume.

"The serums, everything about the manipulation serums and the implants are all _our_ doing. Erudite manufactured these things; however our city provided them with the instructions on how to do so. Jeanine was another pawn in his plan, and she did exactly what he needed when she started her divergent hunt and war. Tris, he's got other allies here on the inside too, two of which are your parents."

"What? No. You are lying! My parents would _never_ do anything to hurt me. What the fuck is your problem? What do you gain by your lies?" I can barely contain my anger at this point.

"You have no reason to trust me at all and I acknowledge that fully. I will do everything I can to earn your trust but please just be careful with your parents and David." Nita says.

"What do you know?" I ask.

"Are you sure you're ready to hear everything? It's not pretty." She says gently.

"No, I'm not sure of anything. Just tell me." I reply. Tobias puts his arm around me and I settle into his side and brace myself for what Nita is about to say.

"Tris, the conception of Edgar was planned to try to create a GP. David's father and his trusted advisors had a grand illusion that Jeanine and your father's genes would create a GP. After observing Jeanine for so long, they believed she was a GP, however they were wrong and she was in fact the first one hundred percent GD that we'd ever personally observed. When they didn't get what they wanted with Edgar they planted your mother there, and the conception of Caleb and you were next. You see, your parents were the closest to GP our society had, and while they were unsure if Caleb would be GP they believed almost from the get go that you were the GP they had sought. Your mother had a difficult delivery with you, and while she was given a life saving hysterectomy immediately after your birth, it unfortunately stopped any chances of further expanding the GP population. You became David's primary focus, and he had to wait for your brain to fully develop before proceeding further. Tris when you left Abnegation you shocked everyone to their core, and they knew they needed to do something drastic to get you under control. Four was unexpected, and they didn't realize they potentially had a second GP until he was proven by Jeanine and Evelyn to be serum resistant." Nita goes on to explain. "Believe me when I say there are things that have been developed here that are specific for use in a GP, and it would be impossible for you to fight them. I'm risking more than just my job by telling you this, if David finds out he'd have me killed. You are his obsession Tris; he will stop at nothing to keep you here under his watch." Nita explains.

"If they believed that Tris' parents were the closest things to GP they'd seen why would they have put Andrew with Jeanine? Why not allow he and Natalie to be together here instead of Chicago?" Four asks.

"David and Natalie were in love. Allowing her to be with someone else was never in his plans, and his father and his advisors had to threaten to remove David from power before he finally relented and allowed Natalie to be placed in Chicago. Andrew didn't want to leave once he had fathered Edgar, so there was no other choice than to allow Natalie to move on." Nita explains.

"This is unbelievable." I murmur. Tobias pulls me closer to his side and presses a kiss to the top of my head.

"There's one more thing I need you both to consider, and it's important. I need you to please hear me out before reacting."

"Ok..." Four says hesitantly.

"I'm not sure that Eric can be trusted." Nita starts and I immediately cut her off.

"You can get the fuck out right now if you're even going to insinuate that my husband has anything to do with any of the shit you've told us about." I growl.

"Tris, please, hear her out." Four says quietly.

"You too Four? Really? I can't believe this." I yell at him. "Say whatever you want. It's not going to change my mind about Eric." I glare at Nita.

"Eric's parents were the main genetic researchers in Erudite. We watched them for years, and they were experimenting with genes from the start. They believed they could manipulate damaged genes to create a genetic strain that could rival genetic purity. Eric's brother Michael was the result of careful genetic planning, and he had the genetic manipulation to become the most brilliant physician the world had ever seen. Eric was an experiment that went wrong, his genetic manipulation was supposed to be to make him brilliant like his brother, but also give him great strength. They manipulated his genes in hopes to one day make him the greatest leader Erudite had ever seen. Instead it made him cold and ruthless and he's spent many years fighting his own predetermined genetic makeup. He still fights it Tris, even though he loves you he still has his demons and he battles with them every day. If he somehow found out there's a way to cure his own damaged genes can you really guarantee he wouldn't do whatever it takes to make that happen?"

"Eric would never hurt me; he's risked his life repeatedly to protect me." I reply.

"I agree, he's protected you, but for what purpose? Could he have kept you alive this whole time because he knew how valuable you are to people like him?" Nita argues. "Tris, you've been betrayed by the people who should love and protect you - Caleb and your parents - and who's to say Eric isn't the next one after you?"

"Who's to say YOU aren't? I don't know shit about you! Yet here you are telling me my parents and potentially my husband is helping this madman?" I yell. "Is Eric going kill me? That's what Four told me for months and Eric is who _saved_ me!"

"No one wants to kill you, but they do want to use your genes. Maybe he's willing to make that trade off, I mean we did watch him make a similar deal with Jeanine Matthews when he helped her to capture Dalia Mizzoni." Nita presses.

"You are comparing what he's doing with me to what happened with Dalia? He attempted to save her life, and he was trying to save Four as well. He was not trying to help Jeanine in any way! What is wrong with you? Why are you trying to poison me against my own husband?" I yell. I feel Four put his hand on my back and rub gently in an effort to calm me.

"We've watched Eric for years. For the longest time we believed he was just as damaged as Jeanine. You could never predict what he was going to do. We watched him show interest in you from the moment you landed on the roof in Dauntless. He fought many internal battles when it came to you Tris, and it was apparent that he held some sort of feelings for you while you were in training. He prepared himself to make his move and he saw you and Four together the night that Four showed you his fears. It made something in Eric snap, and he was on a downward spiral from there. We watched him abuse alcohol, we saw as he carelessly had meaningless sexual experiences and we watched him begin to work closely with Jeanine. You see, Eric learned _exactly_ what you were when he began to work with Jeanine, and we could all see the conflict this caused him. When you and Eric began getting to know each other during the tattoos you'd give him we watched the two of you begin to fall in love. Your many fans here believed that your love was going to be his redemption, but then both of you had your first attempt at memory replacement when they had Four give you both those pills." I feel Four tense next to me and I reach for the arm he has wrapped around my shoulder and thread my fingers with his before giving them a squeeze. "After the memory replacement, both you and Eric suffered greatly, you more so due to the multiple attempts to completely wipe your memories, and he from his attempts to make sense of his past and match it to the feelings he had in his present. The fact that he is so damaged has made his recovery much slower than yours Tris."

"He is _not damaged_!" I yell and Nita cringes.

"Tris, I don't mean to offend you with the terms we use here." She replies quietly. "I just don't know that Eric is as redeemed as he leads you to believe."

"But, he loves me, like you said that is his redemption right?" I ask weakly.

"Love will only take him so far. If a cure to a constant struggle between what's wrong and right was within your grasp, you'd do whatever it took to get it. We believe that is what Eric has been doing ever since Jeanine exposed what you are." Nita finishes.

"There's no one who loves anyone the way that Eric loves me and I love him the same way. This isn't true." I reply.

"Tris, please at least think about it. Has anything ever made sense before this conversation? Have you ever had a clear explanation about why you are so unique? Has anyone said a damn thing that explained why so many people have been after you? I've watched you for as long as I can remember, and I don't see a genetic pure, I see a person. I look at you and Four and I see people who've been tortured with sims, serums, implants and pills. I see human beings who have been treated like nothing more than a science experiment. I see two people who've been betrayed by the very people who are expected to love and protect you. I see two people who are terrified that they will never be safe. I see _people_ not science, not genes and not a fucking exhibit." Nita pleads.

I'm taken aback by her passion and the raw emotions she's shared with us. "Nita, you're talking about my parents and my husband. I can't even fathom what you're accusing them of. I just can't."

"I know I've said a lot and I don't expect you to agree, but please at least think about what I've said." Nita pleads.

"What do you know about my parents' current involvement Nita?" I ask.

The look she's giving me is sympathetic and I steel myself for her answer. "Your parents have always been heavily involved. They've travelled between Milwaukee and Chicago for years, they've been involved in the genetic research and manipulation and they've spent time in the fringe as well."

"The fringe?" I ask.

"Yes. There are people who live outside of the city, and we call the area the fringe. These are the worst of the GD's that we've been unable to get into Chicago. Once Jeanine Matthews and Marcus Eaton rose to power in Chicago, they prevented us from adding any more of what they called divergents to their city." Nita explains.

"You just shut them out of this city because they're not pure?" Four asks incredulously.

"No, they refuse to come here. They live their lives as your factionless did. We've been fighting with them for years. They've never had the numbers to become a serious threat, but any time they've tried David and his special ops team has stepped in." She replies.

"What did he do?" I ask.

"Eliminated the problem." She answers stoically.

"How?" I ask.

"How do you think Tris? They killed the ones who refused to cooperate and they memory wiped the rest. This is why David needs to be stopped." She explains. "His greatest fear is being overthrown by the GD's."

"This is all about power." I say softly.

"And money, the two most damaging things to ever be introduced to the human race." Nita adds. "I need to go, but we can talk more tonight. Matthew is on my side as well just so you're both aware, Four is my assignment and Tris is his, and neither of us plans on doing what David has asked of us. I will see you both tonight at the dinner party."

Four walks Nita to the door and as soon as she's gone he turns to face me. "Tris, I know this is a lot to take in, but what she's said does make sense."

"Four, no. Not Eric. He loves me and you know it. You've seen it. My parents? Four no, stop saying these things. I just can't." I start shaking and I feel him wrap his arms around me.

"Tris, sometimes the people who are supposed to love you just don't know how. You watched what Marcus did. You saw Evelyn. Those are the people who created me and neither of them loved me the way parents are supposed to love their children." Four says quietly.

"Even if my parents are involved in this genetic war or whatever it is, or even if his parents were it doesn't mean Eric would be too. Look at your parents; you don't believe in their cause, you are a different person. Nita wants me to believe that Eric is using me because of who his parents were. But we're not our parents."

"He wasn't always a good person, even you saw the way he was." Four replies.

"He changed." I argue.

"For you." Four retorts. "Do you really know what his motivation was?"

"He loves me. Why are we still having this argument?" I ask and I once again feel tears falling. "I'm so sick of this. I'm so tired Tobias. Every day I'm being forced to question something or someone in my life. I'm exhausted. I don't want to fight any more. I just want a life with my husband where no one is chasing me anymore. I don't think I can take much more. Please Tobias. Can we stop?" I beg.

"We don't have to talk about anything you don't want to." Four says quietly. Neither of us makes any move to separate; instead we sit together on the couch with his arms around me and my head resting on his shoulder.

"In the past twenty four hours I've learned my parents are alive, that their life in Chicago was based on a lie, that they potentially only conceived me to create some sort of genetically pure phenomenon, that my brother knew they were alive and kept that from me, that I'm some sort of freak of nature that yet another person is obsessed with, that said person doesn't want my pure genes mixed with anyone that isn't pure and that he'll use whatever means necessary to control me and keep me here and that my husband may be with me for a reason other than love." I say without emotion.

"Tris, we can leave this place. Edgar, you and me can just go. We love you and we'd never let anything happen to you. If Matthew and Nita are telling the truth you know they'd help us escape. We could go anywhere." He replies.

"You think he's capable of this elaborate scheme to make me fall in love with him just to bring me into some genetic madman? Do you hear that ridiculous that sounds?" I ask.

"Yes, I do. It's just as ridiculous for the brother you grew up with to turn you into a science experiment and risk your life in order to prove something. Or for your own parents to have been working on creating a GP. Or for your boyfriend to believe his mother over the girl he loved. Or for an entire war to be fought over people like the two of us." He replies. "They have been watching us our entire life Tris, there are things they have seen that we never knew. They know each of us better than we know ourselves."

"You can't say things like that." I reply while shaking my head. "I can't take anymore. I've dealt with so much Tobias, but I'm done. I just can't."

"I know it hurts. I don't know what to believe about anyone anymore. I just think we need to keep our eyes and our minds open." He sighs.

I stand up and begin to pace. "He's my husband Tobias. We went through hell to be together. I trust him with my life." I finally reply.

"You once felt that way about me Tris. You felt that way about Caleb too." He replies in a soft voice.

We are interrupted by the door opening and Edgar and Eric walking in. They both have huge smiles and are happily talking as they walk through the door.

"You won't believe what happened today." Eric says with a smile as he wraps his arms around me. I involuntarily stiffen at his touch and he frowns at me. "What's wrong?" He asks.

"What happened today?" I ask.

"A helicopter happened." Edgar replies with a wide grin. "It was amazing. Its air travel, we literally are in a vehicle that lifts from the ground and propels into the sky. The view was like nothing we've ever seen. I wish you had of been there." Edgar says as he joins Four on the couch and wraps his arms around him. "It was beautiful Tobias."

"I bet it was, but don't think you're getting me up there." Four replies with a smirk.

"I will change your mind." Edgar replies playfully and Four scoffs.

"Not happening." Four replies.

"I have ways of convincing you." Edgar says as he kisses his boyfriend.

"You do realize we can see you, right?" I ask with a chuckle.

"As many times as I've seen and heard the things you and your husband do I'm pretty sure I'm entitled to kiss my boyfriend as much as I want." Edgar replies as he winks at me.

"Touché." I reply and I raise my hands in defeat.

Edgar continues to talk about the helicopter trip and while I usually would be chomping at the bit to have that type of adventure I'm instead replaying the conversation with Nita in my mind. Eric wraps his arms around me and I feel him nuzzling his nose against my cheek.

"I love you." He whispers as he gently places a kiss behind my ear.

"I love you too." I reply softly.

"Tris, what's wrong? Did Nita talk to you two?" Eric asks looking between Four and me. A knock on the door thankfully saves me from answering Eric and Edgar moves to open it.

"Hey strangers, they've been keeping you all tucked away huh?" Uriah asks with a grin as he bounds through the door holding Marlene's hand.

"We're here to find out more about this dinner party we've been invited to." Tori says. I watch as Bud, Peter, George and Amar follow her inside.

"I don't like it." Bud comments as he sits down.

"Neither do I." George adds.

"What don't you like about it?" Edgar asks.

"I just get a bad feeling." Bud huffs. "They've poked and prodded us, asked a bunch of damn questions and they haven't offered too much of a plausible explanation as to what they need all this genetic research crap for."

"I don't like the fact that they've watched our city for years and allowed the monstrosities that went on there. They allowed Jeanine to order deaths for the very people they claim to want to protect. They allowed those people to die." George adds.

"I think we need to give them a chance. We've been here less than 48 hours. We should at least keep an open mind." Eric adds.

I can already feel Four' eyes burning into me. I don't like his sudden mistrust of Eric. It's not like the two of them have ever been actual friends, but he's willing to take the word of a stranger over someone he's known for over three years. His words from earlier keep echoing in my head…."They know us better than we know ourselves…"

I'm idly aware of the conversation continuing in the room, and I can feel Eric twirling my wedding rings on my finger as he talks with the rest of the group. This is my husband, we are married, there's no way he would have gone through with any of this if he didn't truly love me. There's absolutely no way he would have fought this hard to keep me alive and us together just for my genes.

"You're spacing out again love." Eric whispers to me, brushing his lips against my ear in the process. I involuntarily shiver. "Baby, what's wrong?" He whispers. He brushes my hair back off of my shoulder before placing a soft kiss on my neck. I turn so I'm facing him and kiss him gently.

"Did you hear they are sending us clothes to wear to this dinner party thing? Who does that?" Marlene asks me while shaking her head. "They seem to be going all out to welcome us to their city."

"It saves me from having to go shopping for some fancy shmancy dress." Tori shrugs. "Why are they doing this party thing anyway?"

"Who cares? We get food, drinks and a party in our honor. It's almost like being back in Dauntless." Uriah quips.

"I may not necessarily trust these people yet, but I'm all for letting loose tonight. When's the last time we were able to do that without any worries?" George asks.

"Their wedding." Edgar answers while gesturing towards Eric and me.

"That was a fun night." Peter says with a grin.

"What was her name?" Amar asks.

"Daphne. Man oh man, she was a lot of damn fun." Peter laughs as he shakes his head. "Almost made me want to stay in Chicago."

"Why did you end up leaving?" Edgar asks.

Peter smiles and looks away almost shyly. This peaks my interest. "When have you ever been shy? Spill it Hayes." I joke with him and he grins at me.

"You guys are my family. I mean yeah it would have been nice to stay in Chicago, and I'm friends with a bunch of people there, but this war and shit made us family. This core group right here you know?" Peter says.

He's absolutely right, and when I look around the room I can tell everyone else agrees too. The conversations continue, and I can tell that the only two people in the room who are completely checked out are Four and me. I watch as Edgar tries unsuccessfully to engage Four in conversation. Eric must notice the exchange because he brings his lips back to my ear.

"What happened before Edgar and I got back here?" He whispers.

I shake my head and the frustrated sigh coming from Eric is his only response. I feel him standing up and he reaches out his hand to me.

"I think we're going to go, maybe try to relax a bit before this party tonight." He announces, and soon everyone else is also following suit. I catch the look that Eric and Edgar exchange before we say our goodbyes and head our separate ways.

Eric and I head next door to our room and he unlocks the door and holds it open for me. I slip past him and as soon as the door closes behind him he reaches for me and pulls me against him.

"Ok, I've been very patient Tris, but my patience is wearing thin. What happened?" He asks as he tucks my hair behind my ears and then presses a kiss to my forehead.

"What do you think about what David told us today?" I counter.

"I think its bullshit. I thought I made that pretty clear." He replies.

"Then why did you say we should give them a chance earlier when we were in Edgar and Four's room?" I ask.

"Because the minute I start voicing any doubt it could cause mass panic in our group. They still look at me as their leader, so I need to act like one and assess the entire situation before making a snap judgment. We need to keep up appearances in order to gain the trust of these people. I found out from the helicopter pilot that not only did David and your parents know about our wedding, they _watched_ it Tris. They had a fucking viewing party like it was the event of the year. _Everyone_ watched it." He explains.

"Why would they say they didn't know?" I ask him. He takes a deep breath and steps away from me.

"We should sit." He replies and I am immediately on edge.

"I'm fine standing. What do you know Eric?" I ask.

"Four snuck off last night to meet with that Nita woman. He doesn't realize it, but Edgar followed him. She was putting out feelers to see if she could trust Four, and she claimed David is not what he says he is." Eric says. "She said he has some sort of plans for the city, and whatever these plans are you are a key part of them, and possibly Four too. She specifically told Four that whatever that David believes the city of Chicago is should have made it impossible for you and Four to have been born from it. Tris they're doing something with genes here but I'm not sure what yet."

"Eric, what do you know about genetic research?" I ask quietly.

"Not a lot. Erudite certainly did their fair share of research on genetics, my parents were actually part of a top secret team of geneticists but they were never at liberty to discuss their research outside of their lab." He replies with a slight shrug. "Michael may have known more since he was studying the field, but we never had a chance to talk about it before..."

His voice trails off and I look up at him and see the tears in his eyes. He walks towards the window in the back of our room and looks out over the city. I walk up behind him and wrap my arms around his torso, pressing a kiss to the back of his neck. He puts his hands on top of mine and we stand together in silence for several minutes.

"How much did they tell you?" He asks. I feel his grip tighten on my arms and I can imagine he can feel my heart pounding through my chest against his back.

"What are you talking about?" I ask tentatively.

I feel him take a deep breath and he turns around in my arms. He rests his forehead against mine.

"Tris, I love you more than anything or anyone in this lifetime. I need you to believe me when I say that." He whispers and I swallow thickly. I don't know what he's about to say or do and for the first time in our relationship I am afraid of him.

"Eric…" I whisper and he places his thumb across my lips to silence me.

 ** _Flashback_**

 _"He's staring at you again." Christina whispers from her spot beside me before throwing her fists at her punching bag and smiling at the way it moves slightly._

 _I glance over and catch the cold grey eyes of our youngest leader. This isn't the first time I've caught him staring at me, but it is the first time he hasn't immediately looked away. There's something about the way he looks at me that spreads warmth in the lower part of my body, parts that I've tentatively explored while thinking of him at night as everyone else in the dorm is sleeping._

 _I lift an eyebrow at him and I watch as the corner of his mouth curls up slightly in a smirk. He pushes himself off the wall he's been leaning against and makes his way over to my station._

 _"Do you think you're so good that you no longer need practice initiate?" He asks in a low rumble._

 _"No." I answer before correcting my stance and punching the bag in front of me. I feel his large hands on my hips and he adjusts me slightly. He then moves his hand up to my torso._

 _"Keep tension here. You keep relaxing these muscles and it leaves you vulnerable. You're not as strong as some of your fellow initiates, but you are smarter and faster." He says in a quiet tone._

 _"Thank you." I say to him and he nods. He continues to stand next to me watching my every move._

 _"Initiates, you're dismissed. See you tomorrow morning, don't be late." Four bellows and I move to grab the towel from the floor next to me._

 _Eric reaches it first and hands it to me. "Would you like to spar?" He asks._

 _"Me? Spar with you? You'd kill me." I shake my head and he chuckles._

 _"Come on Tris, let's try it." He prods._

 _"You said my name." I reply without thinking._

 _"Why wouldn't I?" He shrugs as he walks towards the mat. I'm expected to follow him._

 _"Because you've never called me anything other than initiate or Stiff the entire time I've been here." I reply._

 _He laughs, an honest to goodness laugh and it changes his whole face. I've always been attracted to Eric, but when he smiles it completely transforms him._

 _"Don't get used to it." He gestures for me to come closer. "We doing this or are you scared?"_

 _"You don't scare me." I reply as I walk closer to him._

 _"Oh really, not even a little bit?" He asks as he closes the distance between us. He trails a finger down my collarbone over the new tattoo I have there._

 _"Nope." I reply._

 _"So Four hasn't warned you about me yet?" He asks. He is still touching me, rubbing his thumb over my tattoo. It's hard to concentrate when his hands are on me._

 _"You already know the answer to that." I retort._

 _"What did number boy tell you?" He asks._

 _"He told me I shouldn't trust you." I reply honestly._

 _"What do you think about his warning Tris?" He asks. His hand is moving up the side of my neck until he's cupping my cheek. I feel his thumb trail across it and I know he can feel the heat of my blush under his hand._

 _"I think nothing of his warning. I make my own decisions." I reply._

 _"So, do you trust me?" He asks. He moves his thumb down to my lips and holds it there so I don't speak. "Think about your answer." He says quietly. I shiver involuntarily from the gesture. He moves his thumb away from my lips and trails it lightly over my cheek again. "Do you trust me Tris?"_

 _"I trust you until you give me a reason not to Eric." I reply evenly. My heart is racing and I can feel myself almost melting under the intense gaze of his silvery eyes. He leans in towards me, close enough for me to feel his breath across my lips._

 _"Tris, can I…" He begins and we hear the training room door open. We spring apart and I hear Eric mutter a curse under his breath._

 ** _End Flashback_**

"They warned you not to trust me, didn't they?" He asks. His voice is gentle and soft. "Be honest with me." He moves his thumb away from my mouth and cups my cheek with his hand, trailing his thumb across it.

"Yes." I whisper. There is only one word I can use to describe the look on his face.

Deadly.


	35. Chapter 35

**AN: As always, thank you to who has become my unofficial beta and official sounding board Lunaschild2016 for her advice with this chapter.**

 **Thanks to you, my readers, for the reviews and follows. I write because it makes me happy, but your motivation is what makes me better and keeps me going.**

 **Enjoy.**

Tris POV

Eric's no longer looking at me, but he still has his arms wrapped around my waist while he stares straight through me. I'm not looking at my loving husband, instead I'm looking at the stern leader whose icy grey eyes glared at me while daring me to jump into the unknown the day I arrived at Dauntless. The body tension, the expression and the hard look are exactly the same and I wonder what thoughts are swirling behind those emotionless eyes.

"They are trying to turn you against me." He murmurs.

"Eric..." I reply but he starts talking again.

"I need you to trust me. I can't have you doubt me." He says without emotion.

"Eric look at me." I say in a shaky voice. He continues to stare straight through me. "Baby, please look at me. Please."

He looks down at me and his eyes are cold and hard. I move my hand to his cheek and suddenly he crashes his lips to mine, kissing me hungrily. My body reacts immediately and desire is burning through my veins. I can tell by the rough way he's kissing me that he feels the same way.

He breaks the kiss long enough to pull my shirt up over my head and I do the same for him. He practically rips my bra off of me before picking me up. I wrap my legs around him and we devour each other's mouths as he walks us over to the bed. He drops me roughly onto the bed, backing up to start removing my pants. I reach for him and he pushes my hands away.

"No." He growls as he continues to slide my pants and panties down my legs.

Once I'm completely laid bare in front of him he stops touching me, backing away slightly as he slowly unbuckles his belt and pulls it from his waist with a snap. He crawls up my body before straddling my hips. I can see his cock straining against the fabric of his pants and I desperately want to touch him. I reach for his waistband and he quickly grabs my arms and pins them above my head.

"Do you trust me?" He whispers. His eyes are dark with lust and I lift my hips slightly to try to get some friction where I desperately need it. "Answer me." He growls.

"Eric, what are you doing..."

He puts his hand over my mouth and I take a sharp breath in through my nose. He leans in close to my face and looks directly into my eyes.

"Think about your answer. Do you trust me?" He asks in his dangerous low voice. I can feel the goose bumps rising on my body. "Are you ready to answer me?" I nod slightly and he slowly moves his hand from my mouth down to my neck. He's applying the slightest bit of pressure to my throat.

"Yes." I whisper.

"Good." He replies. I feel his fingers tightening slightly on my throat. He leans in close to my ear. "Are you afraid of me?"

"No." I whisper.

"You should be. There are things I like...urges I fight when I'm with you." His breath is tickling my ear as he continues to whisper.

"You won't hurt me." I reply.

"Oh I will, the question is will you like it?" He drags his tongue around the shell of my ear as he breathes heavily.

"Eric..." I moan and he releases my throat. He takes his belt and wraps it tightly around my wrists.

"Last chance. Are you afraid Tris?" He growls.

"No." I reply.

He trails his hot mouth down my body as he crawls away from me. I watch as he pulls his pants and boxer briefs down his muscular legs.

"If you need me to stop you tell me." He says quietly and he slowly strokes himself.

I can't help but be nervous. Eric has been aggressive with me before, but this is unchartered territory.

"Tris, did you hear me?" He says sternly.

"Yes." I reply, never taking my eyes off of his hand as he strokes up and down his impressive length.

Eric crawls back into bed, lazily kissing up my legs and working his way to my inner thighs. He pushes my legs apart and blows cool air on my center. I shudder and he darkly chuckles. He slowly runs his warm tongue through my folds, taking his time to firmly circle my swollen bundle before grazing his teeth around it.

"You taste so good." He moans as he continues to lap his tongue around my clit. I buck my hips up to him and he presses his arms on my legs to hold me down. "You should taste yourself. You're delicious." He takes another long lap through my folds before crawling up and capturing my lips with his. He slips his tongue aggressively into my mouth and I can taste myself on his tongue and lips. I moan from the sensation and I feel his fingers working into my center.

He moves his mouth to my neck and I feel his warm tongue as he trails down to my breasts. He lightly bites my nipple and I groan. He kisses down my stomach and I feel him swirl his tongue in my belly button and I buck my hips against him again.

"Don't make me tie your legs too." He growls before diving into my wet center again.

"Fuck..." I breathe out as he works his tongue inside of me, then replaces it with his fingers before sucking on my clit.

"I could live off of you..." He mumbles. "You're going to cum for me aren't you baby?"

"I am." I groan.

"I want to taste it." He whispers before working his tongue through my folds again. His fingers are curling inside of me and I am trembling from the stimulation. My orgasm rushes over me and I can't hold back the scream as I pulsate around his fingers.

"Fuck yes. You are so fucking wet." He moans as he laps his tongue and I push my hips against him. I feel him spreading my wetness down and slowly pushing a finger into my back end.

"Eric..." I whine.

"Relax baby." He purrs as he begins fluttering his tongue against my sensitive bundle of nerves.

He continues to spread my wetness and I feel him pushing another finger into me. The pleasure is overriding the pain and I am overwhelmed with the new sensation.

"Eric...it's..." I moan.

"Do you need me to stop?" He asks.

"No..." I whisper.

He continues concentrating on my clit as he slowly pumps his fingers inside of me. I can't stop my hips from bucking with his movements and I feel another orgasm tearing through me.

"Fuck...Eric... oh my god..." I repeat as I tremble against him. He slowly withdraws his fingers and I feel him moving away from me. I watch him disappear into the bathroom and hear him washing his hands. Within a few seconds he's returned to the bed.

He picks me up slightly and leans me against the headboard. He loosens my restraints briefly, wraps the belt around the headboard and tightens it before fastening it.

"Open up baby." He says quietly and I part my lips while he slides himself into my mouth. The smooth skin of his pulsating cock feels warm against my lips. He gently caresses my cheek as he moves against me. "I love watching you do this. You're so fucking beautiful." He strokes my hair as I move my mouth back and forth over him.

He suddenly moves away from me and he trails his hands up and down my body.

"You have no idea how much I fucking love you, do you?" He quietly says. "They think they can turn you against me, but you are mine. You are my wife. You are my entire existence Tris."

"I'm yours Eric." I whisper.

Eric pushes my legs apart again and he sits on his knees between them. He grasps himself and rubs his head through my soaked folds. I shut my eyes and moan in pleasure.

"Don't you dare close your eyes when I fuck you." He grunts. The pressure of his hand is back on my throat as his silvery eyes bore into mine. He inches himself into me while keeping eye contact the entire time. He snaps his hips against me and I pull against my restraints.

"Please let me touch you." I beg while he pounds against me. He pulls out of me and moves closer so he can unbuckle the belt that restrains my wrists.

"You want to touch me?" He whispers.

"Yes." I reply.

"I want my cock in your mouth." He growls. He yanks on my hair to make me look up at him. He grasps himself and drags his head across my lips. I dart my tongue out and he smiles down at me. "You like the way you taste, don't you Tris?" I part my lips and he slides himself into my mouth. I can easily taste myself on his skin and it turns me on more than I ever thought it could. Eric thrusts in my mouth a few more times before backing away.

"I love your mouth." He says before kissing me hard.

"I need you to untie me." I reply in a quiet voice.

"Why?" He whispers.

"I want to fuck you." I murmur. His eyes darken as he unbuckles the belt and unwinds it from my wrists. I move from beneath him and push him towards the bed. "Sit" I command as I push him against the headboard. Surprisingly he complies without argument.

I turn my back to him and straddle him, lining up and sinking onto his length.

"Fuck." He groans. I begin bouncing up and down as I ride him and he grunts and groans in appreciation. He wraps his arms around me and begins pulling my shoulders down and I feel him biting my neck. He pulls me flush with his body and I can feel his thighs tensing below me.

"You like that?" I moan and his only response is to growl against my neck. I slow my pace down and lean my back against his chest. He roughly turns my face towards his and kisses me. He's trying to move me to increase the pace but I fight against him instead. His frustration causes him to pick me up and push me on to my hands and knees in front of him.

"You think it's a good idea to tease me Tris?" He growls. I look back and catch the feral look in his eyes.

"No." I answer hoarsely.

"You make me have to punish you." He replies.

"Punish?" I ask.

He doesn't answer, instead he firmly smacks my ass with his hand. It's not violent at all but the sting causes me to move slightly away from him.

"You're not going anywhere." He commands. He grips my hair but he doesn't pull hard, he only holds me in place with slight pressure. I feel the bed move under me and then the weight of his body pressed against me. He presses his finger into my back end again and I push back against him.

"You ready baby?" He whispers. He pushes a second finger in and I feel him stretching me.

"Eric... what...?"

"This is where you tell me to stop Tris. Right now." He commands.

"No."

He stills his movements. "No what?"

"Don't stop." I whisper. He removes his fingers from me and I look over my shoulder at him. He looks me in the eye as he moves against me, and I feel him pressing his cock into where his fingers just were.

"Oh my god." I can't help but cry out. It's painful, but it's pleasure at the same time. I am overwhelmed with this new sensation as he continues to slowly press into me.

"Tris...my god...Tris..." He moans as he begins moving slowly. He moves his hand around to my center and begins rubbing me. His pace increases and soon he's pounding his hips against me as I whine and moan. "Do you like this?"

"Mhmm." I hum. He yanks on my hair and stops his movements.

"Say it Tris. Tell me what you want." He commands.

"Fuck me Eric." I reply and he begins pounding against me again.

All coherence is gone, neither of us can speak and our loud moans and grunts fill the room as he pushes me over the edge and I fall apart around him while he fills me with his seed. I can feel his body weight as he slumps against me, and his chest is heaving against my back while he tries to catch his breath.

After several minutes he slowly slides out of me and I let him pull us both down so we're lying together on the bed. He wraps his arms around me and I lay my head on his sweaty chest.

"Did I hurt you?" He asks when his heart rate slows down.

"A little." I reply.

"Tris, I told you to..."

This time I put my finger across lips to silence him.

"I liked it." I reply and I can feel him relax beneath me.

"I want you to know that is only for us." He says in a low voice.

"What do you mean?" I ask as I peer up at him.

"I've never done these things with anyone else. I don't want you to ever think I'm treating you like I did them." He replies. I look up at him and notice him staring off again.

"Baby." I reply. "Look at me." His jaw tightens and he finally looks down. "I loved it. I love what we do together and I know it's just for us. You used them for a release and when we are together, even when we're rough and possessive we're still us. Everything we do is amazing."

He says nothing, but his fingers begin tracing up and down my back. We lay together in comfortable silence while I enjoy his gentle touches.

"You know I love you Tris. I would never do anything to hurt you, physically or emotionally." He says quietly.

"I know this, and I love you too. There will be no one and nothing that will ever keep us apart." I reply.

"All of that could be considered a distraction." He says. I hum in agreement and I feel his chuckle rumble through his chest. "Shower?"

"I'm kind of ok with that distraction. Besides, we're newlyweds, isn't it expected that we go at it like bunnies?" I joke.

"Like bunnies? Really Tris? I think I have more stamina than a bunny." He twirls my hair around his fingers absentmindedly.

"I have no complaints about your stamina." I sigh and he laughs before pulling me up to him for a soft kiss. I know we have a lot to talk about but I can tell Eric is still on edge, even after our lovemaking. I continue to rub my hand across his chest, pausing every once in a while to tug on his nipple rings. I can still feel the tension is his muscles and when I glance up at him I see he still has his jaw clenched and he continues to stare off into space.

"Come on, let's shower." I urge and he nods.

Our shower does nothing to lighten Eric's mood, and even though he's gentle and loving with his touches I can tell his mind is far away.

"Eric?" I whisper. "Do you remember when I was in training and you had asked me to spar with you for the first time?"

He moves his eyes down to mine and holds eye contact. "Are you talking about that last day before stage two started, I think we had you practicing on the bags and I kept you after dismissal?" I nod along with his description. "What about it?"

"We had a moment, didn't we?" I ask. His expression softens slightly.

"You remember it?" He asks and I nod. "You haven't recovered too many memories of us from while you were in training." He murmurs.

"No, I haven't but I remembered that one earlier today. Eric, you were saying something to me before Four came back into the room that day. Do you remember what it was?" I ask.

He closes his eyes for a moment as if he's searching his memories for an answer. When he opens his eyes his expression is much softer and he has the trace of a smile on his lips.

"I've always been the type who takes what he wants, as you already know about me, but I didn't want to scare you off back then. Even though it was obvious you were made to be Dauntless, I knew your Abnegation upbringing may have limited your experiences with the opposite sex." He explains.

"Meaning?" I prod. He smiles at me before continuing.

"I wanted to kiss you, and I was going to ask you if I could." He says softly.

"Why didn't you ever try again after that night?" I ask.

"I lost my nerve, and I also couldn't manage to get you alone after that, Four made sure he was always around. I had finally decided to tell you how I felt and went out looking for you one night, but I saw you and Four coming out of the fear landscape room and I knew I'd missed my chance." He explains.

"I wish you had of told me." I say.

"Would it have changed anything? You wanted him." He argues.

"It would have changed everything. I'd wanted you since I saw you standing on the roof. I did start something with Four, and I can't say it was to replace you because I did care for him, but I've always wanted you."

"Why are you telling me this?" He asks.

"Because I need you to know when it started for me, and I need you to understand that even when we weren't together I still wanted you. I don't care about your past and the things they told me about today don't matter because you are my everything. I trust you with my life, and I meant it when I said that to you before. You have every part of me Eric." I reply.

"Tris, can I kiss you?" He whispers.

"You're asking for permission now?" I reply with a smile and he grins at me.

"I never got to finish my thought back then before your idiot ex burst into the room thinking I was murdering you or some shit." He chuckles.

"Kiss me Eric." I reply and he kisses me slowly and deeply before breaking for a breath. We stand beneath the spray of warm water and hold on to each other tightly. This is what I want and need and I refuse to let anyone try to poison me against the man I love.

"I love you." He murmurs.

"I love you too. We are ok Eric. I promise you that." I reply.

"What did they say about me Tris?" He finally asks.

"Let's get out of here and dry off, then we'll talk, ok?" I ask and he nods. We finish our shower and dry off, then head back to the bedroom.

Eric looks pensive as he sits on the bed with his back against the headboard. I crawl in bed next to him and he wraps his arms around me.

"They told me about your parents and the genetic research they were involved in." I reply, purposely being vague.

"They told you my brother and I were experiments." He replies. "It's ok to talk about it with me Tris." He adds. I feel him tracing his fingers up and down my spine.

"Yes, Nita told us about that. They watched you for a long time, and their assumption is that you protected me because you wanted me for genetic reasons." I'm still being vague, I just can't bring myself to even insinuate there is anything damaged about my husband.

"They call me damaged, I already know that part." He replies.

"You are _not_ _damaged_ Eric. You are the most important person in my life baby; there is nothing wrong with you or with us." I argue. He kisses the top of my head and I scoot up to him and press kisses along his jawline.

"They think I needed you to somehow fix my damage? Is that it Tris?" He asks.

"Yes." I reply. I'm nervously playing with his chest hair while I wait for him to react.

"How?" He presses.

"Nita said that David plans on using Four and me to cure what he considers to be genetic damage. I've proven to be pure by opening the box, and he believes Four is too based on his resistance to serums. She believes that it's possible based on your family's involvement in genetic manipulation, in particular the way they manipulated your genes that you'd want to do whatever it takes to get a cure." I reply.

"This is some seriously fucked up shit." He replies.

"There's more." I reply. The tension coming off of Eric is palpable and he moves us so we're lying on our sides facing each other. I lightly trace my fingers through his messy hair and run my nails across his scalp. "There is some sort of strange phenomenon that causes the genes to degrade if a GP gets pregnant by a GD. One of the reasons that David has been reacting so strangely to our marriage is because he doesn't want us to have kids."

"So he thinks he can just issue you an order and you'll follow it? What the fuck Tris? We've already been told we're not even married and now this?" He fumes. I wrap my arms around him and run my hands up and down his muscular back.

"We _are_ married. What he is trying to make us believe about Chicago isn't true." I reply softly.

"Really? Are you sure?" He asks.

"I think so. It did come from Nita, however considering we now know that David lied about his knowledge of our wedding I'd tend to believe her over him." I reply.

"I really hope that Nita is right." He replies. "What else is there, I can tell you're holding back."

"She called David a puppet master in regards to Jeanine's war. I also found out that Milwaukee and the labs here are who created the serums that are in use in Chicago. While Erudite manufactures them, ultimately everything they get initiates from here. They have taken their own liberties with some of the serums obviously. There are also serums here that are specifically for GP's." I answer.

"What kinds of serums Tris?" He asks me. His face is serious and his grip on my bare hip is tight.

"She didn't go into detail, but she insinuated that my cooperation could be forced." I reply quietly.

"We have to get you out of here." Eric says as he makes a move to get out of bed. I put my hand on his arm to stop him.

"When will we stop running Eric?" I ask and he takes a defeated breath. "We need to stop David and not run away from this."

"How much further does this go? If we find a way to stop David, is it truly over?" He asks.

"I think we need to talk more to Nita and Matthew. She told us earlier that Four is her assignment and I am Matthew's, and that neither of them were going to do what David wanted." I reply.

"Does Four believe any of this shit?" He asks.

"I don't know. We were talking about it when you and Edgar walked in to the room." I answer.

"I'm going to tell you everything I know, even the stuff that isn't pretty. You have to promise me that you'll hear me out Tris, please?"

"I promise, I'll hear you out." I reply.

He takes a deep breath. "My parents were geneticists, like I told you earlier. I was being truthful when I said they weren't able to talk about what they were involved in. However, I did learn some things from Jeanine. My parents allowed her to experiment on both Michael and me, and that went on from about the time I was ten until I hit my teens. At the time I didn't know what she was looking for, or why she felt the need to experiment on my brother or me. I later learned that she was trying to find a way to genetically alter us. She never used the terms GD or GP, but between what I learned working with her back then and what I've learned that David is involved here now I know that whatever she was working on was likely in tandem with him, however because she was so power hungry she was doing what she could to take control of the entire project, hence her war."

"What aren't you telling me Eric?" I ask.

"My whole life I've struggled with doing the right things. Every morning that I wake up it's a constant battle against my own fucking mind. Jeanine explained that the genetic manipulation my parents put me through is what damaged me. Tris, I've known who you are for years now. When I was a kid they'd talk about you, they wouldn't mention your name but I knew you were exactly what they wanted. Right after you transferred to Dauntless Jeanine approached me again and told me that you were to be protected at all costs. They never expected you to leave Abnegation, and when you did they certainly didn't think you'd choose Dauntless. I was promised that if I kept you safe, and delivered you to Jeanine they'd 'cure' my personality issues as they called them. She made me an offer not unlike what she had done with Dalia." He pauses and I take a chance to speak.

"But you aren't the one who turned me in."

"I'm the one who stole the box from your parents' house. I am the reason you were eventually taken into custody." He replies quietly.

I move away from him and quickly get out of the bed before he can stop me. I grab one of the robes that are hanging up and tie it around my body.

"Tris, please…"

"You told me you didn't believe in her cause. You testified under truth serum. How did this not come out? How could you not tell me this before now?"

He stands up and walks towards me but I put both of my hands up to stop him from coming closer.

"You said you'd hear me out." He replies.

"I did hear you out. I heard you tell me that you essentially were a part of the torture I went through because of that fucking box! You've never thought it was important to mention that to me?"

"I didn't know how to tell you. When was I supposed to bring that up? When was the right time?" He replies.

"Before you slept with me, before you married me… how about then?" I yell.

"I didn't know what was in the box. I also didn't know what she had to do to you to make it open. I had absolutely no idea. All I knew is she told me that everything I needed to cure the issues I had was inside that box. I don't think _she_ even knew for sure what was inside of it."

"You should have told me! What was all that earlier? You decide to fuck me into submission before you spring that news on me? Would you have ever told me if we didn't end up here Eric?"

"I would have found a way Tris." He replies.

"What else are you hiding from me Eric?"

"Nothing else, I swear. Everything else from my time with Jeanine and the war you know about." He replies.

"How were you able to lie under truth serum?" I ask.

He furrows his brows at me. "I didn't lie, and I can't lie under the serum. I can't fight serums the same way you and Four can."

"You said you wanted to save me because you loved me."

"That was the truth. I may have known that you were somehow the 'cure' for my genetic issues, but that had nothing to do with why I saved you Tris. I did it because I love you, I am in love with you and I would never lie about that."

"Every single person." I whisper. "My brother, Four, my parents and now you?"

"No, I'm not like them." He steps closer to me and I back away until I hit the door. "Tris, I had no idea what was inside of that box. I promise you this. I was still trying to protect you when I took it. I thought if I got her that box she'd leave you alone. I was trying to get her focus off of you. I had no idea she needed you to open it."

"You expect me to believe that after hearing her obsess over me for _years_ that you thought getting her a fucking box would stop her from coming after me?"

"I didn't know what it would do Tris! At that point I was willing to do whatever she wanted to make her stop pressuring me to bring her divergents. If she wanted a stupid box I damn sure was willing to get it for her." He shouts.

"I should go..."

"No!" He reaches for me and pulls me against his chest. "I can't let you run away from me anymore. I love you. I should have told you well before now and I'm so sorry that I kept it from you. Tris you can be as angry as you need to be at me because I deserve it but please don't leave. We have fought through everything to be together."

In this moment I realize something that should have been obvious before - Eric is the only person in my life who has constantly tried to protect me. Even before we fell in love, before we were ever friends and really when we were barely acquaintances he was fighting for me. We've had arguments, but even at our very worst he's been the best person in my life. I wrap my arms around him and press a kiss to his shoulder.

"Eric, is there anything else? I can't be blindsided."

"No. That's it Tris. That's the only thing I've hidden from you." He replies. "Everything's out in the open now."

"I love you." I say quietly.

"I love you too, so damn much baby." He replies and I feel his body begin to relax a bit. I press soft kisses across his shoulders and neck and he sighs against me.

"Are we ok?" He asks.

"Yes." I reply. I lean back slightly and pull his face towards me for a kiss. The tension between us melts as our kisses deepen and I feel him pushing the hastily tied robe off of my shoulders.

"I want you." He says quietly and I take his hands in mine and lead him back to our bed. We've barely even touched each other when a loud knock at our door startles us.

"Maybe they'll go away." He says before planting a hard kiss on my lips. He then kisses down to the tattoo on my ribcage and we hear another knock, this time sounding more urgent. "Fucking cockblockers." He grumbles, grabbing his pants from the floor and slipping them on before leaving the bedroom. "Stay here and stay naked, I'm going to go kill whoever is at our damn door."

I pull the covers over my naked body and listen for any sounds from the other room. I can tell from the tone of Eric's voice he's annoyed, and whoever was here seems to have left quickly. I hear the bedroom door open and Eric walks in carrying two large garment bags.

"What's all that?" I ask.

"Clothes for tonight, I guess they wanted you to have choices. Did you notice our closet and dresser have been stocked too?" He asks.

"More than the basics they provided yesterday?" I ask and he nods as he opens the sliding doors of the closet.

"Wow." I murmur. The closet is packed with clothes for both of us, along with shelves of shoes. "They are really trying to keep us here."

Eric unzips one of the garment bags and pulls out a black tuxedo, along with several shirt and bow tie options. "Fancy." He says.

"What's in the other bag?" I ask and he unzips that one. He carefully pulls out two dresses, both long and incredibly beautiful.

"I think I'm going to need you to try these on." He says in a husky voice.

"Are you asking me to put clothes on my dear husband?" I ask and he grins at me.

"Yeah, I need to help my wife pick out a dress for tonight." He replies with a sexy smirk. I get out of bed, grab the two dresses from his hand and walk into the bathroom.

The first dress is a dark red and it's possibly more skin that I'd ever shown while actually wearing clothes. It's a halter dress that has a deep v neck in the front and the back dips dangerously low as well. There are long slits on either side of the dress that show off plenty of leg when I take a step. I walk out into the bedroom and Eric's jaw drops open.

"Do you like it?" I ask innocently as I turn around in front of him.

"I'm going to reserve all comments until I see the next one." He replies as he peppers kisses down my exposed chest.

"Behave. I'll be right back." I reply as I push him away and scurry back into the bathroom.

The first dress certainly nailed the sexy factor, but the second dress is exquisite. It's main color is navy blue, strapless with a corset top however it has a pattern that looks like peacock feathers that begins on the top front and travels down the length of the corset, where it then tapers to one side of the full skirt. The skirt has layers of light fabric that flow like water with every move I make. I pull the dress on and realize I need help tightening the laces in the back.

"Baby?" I call out and within seconds Eric walks through the door.

"Tris…" He whispers when he sees the dress.

"Can you tighten the laces?" I ask as I peer over my shoulder. I watch him in the reflection of the mirror and smile at the look of concentration on his face as he carefully tightens the laces at my back.

"This reminds me of our wedding." He murmurs before brushing his lips over my shoulder as he ties the dress.

"Is this the one?" I ask and he hums in approval. "It feels so strange to be getting dressed up for some party knowing that it's being thrown by a madman. I don't know what to do about my parents either."

"We have a little under two hours to not think about any of that. So we relax, we get ready, we do whatever but we don't think about any of that shit." Eric replies.

He helps me out of the dress and we hang everything up before going back to the bedroom. Eric changes into boxers and a pair of shorts and I slip on my panties and his discarded t-shirt. We've barely made it back to the couch before someone is once again knocking on our door.

"Jesus." Eric mutters.

"I'll get it." I reply and he grabs my arm.

"You have no pants on." He smirks.

"Whoever it is will have to accept that I'm not wearing pants. This shirt is longer than some dresses I've worn." I reply with an eye roll and Eric laughs at me before going to the door. He turns to me after looking through the peep hole.

"Tris, it's your parents." He says quietly.


	36. Chapter 36

**AN: As always thank you for the love, follows and reviews.**

Eric POV

She doesn't have the first clue how beautiful she is.

I watch her across the room as she smiles politely at the person that Roxanne has introduced her to. Her dark blonde hair is in some sort of fancy braided thing...Marlene called it an updo or something ridiculous like that while she was working feverishly on it before we left our room. She's wearing the blue dress, and as much as I couldn't wait to see her in it I now can't wait to see her out of it.

They brought her some jewelry; earrings, necklaces, bracelets, rings all of these expensive and quite attractive pieces and she chose a simple pair of dangling earrings and she kept her wedding rings on, even when her mother suggested she take them off and wear some of the provided jewelry to match her dress.

When her parents arrived she somehow found a way to act like nothing had changed. It's strange, because now that we suspect that Natalie and Andrew are somehow involved in this plan to use Tris for her genes we find their behavior more and more suspicious. Tris and I answered her parents' questions about our wedding without missing a beat, even though we both knew they had watched it. Andrew slipped once during the conversation, subtle but enough that both Tris and I caught it She didn't miss a beat though, and as soon as their forced and obviously faked social visit was over Tris burst into tears.

I tried holding her and talking to her until she calmed down but when that didn't help I distracted her the only other way I knew how. Twice.

We've been unable to get any type of alone time with Nita or Matthew; instead Roxanne has been introducing us to who's who in the city of Milwaukee since we arrived over an hour ago. The worst part is that dinner has yet to be served, although they keep circulating trays of these tiny little morsels of food. At least they have an open bar.

"This whole party is bullshit." Edgar says as he slides into the bar stool next to me.

"Pretty much." I agree. "I think the whole purpose is to distract us."

"It's working for some of us." He retorts as he gestures towards Marlene, Uriah, George and Amar. They are laughing heartily with the other people who are sitting at the table with them. "I just want to know what reality in this place is. We came here to protect the ones we love, and now we're worried that they are once again being targeted. When does it stop?" He asks.

"Love?" I ask.

"That's the only word you heard in everything I said huh?" Edgar retorts. You wouldn't have known he and Tris were raised separately for how alike they are. I quite enjoy bantering with my brother in law.

"I heard other words too, but that one stood out. Things are that serious?" I ask with a smirk.

"Yeah, I think so. We've known each other a long time. While I can't say for sure it's love I know it's damn sure close. I think he may be there too." Edgar replies.

"That's good man. You deserve happiness." I reply.

"Even if you hate him?" Edgar chuckles.

"I don't necessarily hate him but he and I don't have a pretty history. He was a good friend once upon a time." I shrug.

"You got the girl though." He grins.

"That I did." I reply as I scan the crowd for Tris. She catches my eye and smiles sweetly at me. "Damn she's gorgeous." I murmur and Edgar chuckles.

"Yeah, she is. You guys doing ok? She's had a lot of shit come down on her since being here."

"Her parents came by earlier, apparently right after they had left your place. That really threw her for a loop. They almost seemed to be digging for information, but it's really subtle. Andrew slipped slightly when we were talking about the wedding; he actually corrected something I said so to me it was obvious they had watched it. I just don't know what they have to gain with this genetic bullshit." I reply.

"They are definitely digging. Like you said, it's subtle. They're working it into what seems to be normal conversation." He replies.

"Edgar, what did Four say about me?" I ask while turning towards him.

"I take it Tris told you." He states and I nod. "Nita warned them about you, she said she wasn't sure you could be trusted because of your parents' genetic research and manipulation on you and your brother. She thinks it's possible that you're using Tris to find your own cure."

I shake my head. "I take it you don't believe her?"

"Not a word of it." He replies. "You love my sister, period."

"I do." I nod. "What about Four?"

He sighs. "Tobias is paranoid as hell by nature. It's almost ingrained in him. He and I had time to talk before Andrew and Natalie came by and I think I have him convinced. He wants to hear it from Tris too I think."

"The history between Four and I hasn't been pretty, especially after Dalia. I would say I don't give a fuck whether he trusts me or not, but at this point it wouldn't be true. We all need to work together."

"Agreed, and believe it or not he finally believes you about what happened with Dalia." He replies.

"Really?"

"Your wife is quite convincing when she defends your honor." He smirks and I laugh.

"I'm a lucky man." I reply. Edgar and I gaze out into the crowd and watch as Tris and Four are whisked from group to group and introductions are made. It's obvious that this entire party was has everything to do with the two of them.

"They're parading the two GP's around like a fucking exhibit." Edgar says from next to me. "They give two shits about the rest of us."

"I was thinking the same thing. I gave up after they completely ignored my presence and headed over here to drink." I reply with a shrug.

Four gestures for Edgar to come to the small group he's standing with. "More schmoozing I guess. I'll be back later." He says as he walks off.

I order another whiskey and continue people watching from my spot at the bar. I scan the crowd for Matthew or Nita and don't see either of them.

"You're Eric." A woman with dark red hair says as she walks up to me.

"Yeah, what about it?" I ask.

"I'm a fan. My name is Emily." She says as she extends her hand. I reluctantly shake it and she holds on to my hand a little longer than I'd like. I move it away from her and turn towards the bar. "Mind if I sit?"

"The seats aren't assigned last time I checked." I reply and she sits down next to me.

"You look just as thrilled with this shindig as I am." She sighs.

"It's not my thing." I reply, trying to think of the least assholish way to tell this woman to get lost.

"What brought you out here to Milwaukee?" She asks. I watch her flag down the bartender and order a gin and tonic. "Would you like anything?" She asks as she looks over at me with a slight smile.

"No thanks." I reply as I turn away to look for Tris. I see Roxanne has ushered her to another group, and her back is currently facing me. I scan my eyes over her bare shoulders and watch the way her tattoos look with her subtle body movements. She is so damn sexy without even trying.

"You never did answer me, what brought you to Milwaukee?" She asks.

I turn back towards the bar and grab my whiskey, downing the rest of the glass before answering her question.

"You've watched us; you should already know the answer to that." I reply.

"Wow, I guess that asshole persona wasn't an act." She replies. "Sorry for bothering you."

For some reason I feel like I should apologize for my behavior, so I stop her from leaving.

"Wait, I was being rude, you don't have to go. I'm just getting used to things around here. It's odd to have so many people know me but not know anyone in return." I don't know where that came from, especially when talking to a perfect stranger.

"I understand. I can't imagine the culture shock you're going through." She replies. "Want another drink?"

My mind says no… "Yes." I reply.

"Jack Daniels, right?" She says softly and I nod. She signals for the bartender and orders drinks.

I look over to find Tris and I no longer see her in the room. I glance over and see Four and Edgar talking with the same group of people as before. I feel a bit cloudy and I shake my head to try to clear it.

"Here you go. How about a toast? Here's to new starts." Emily says as she clinks her glass with mine.

I hum in response and take another gulp of my drink. My head is feeling foggy; all this drinking on an empty stomach must be getting to me. I glance around the crowd again and still see no signs of my wife.

"You ok?" Emily asks from beside me.

"Yeah, just need to eat. Drinking on an empty stomach is never a good idea." I reply.

"These dinner parties are always like this, a bunch of alcohol and little bits of food until they finally decide to give us a real meal. I'd much prefer they just put a buffet out here and skip all the etiquette." She replies and I chuckle.

"Yeah, I don't much enjoy this fancy shit myself. How long have you lived here?" I ask.

"All my life, I was born right here in the city and raised here. I started working in the lab when I graduated, so right at sixteen. I've been there for six years now." She replies.

"What do you do in the labs?" I ask.

"Genetic research, much like your parents." She replies. I immediately turn to face her.

"What do you know about my parents? Are they here? Are they alive?" I ask.

"Oh Eric, no, I'm sorry. I didn't bring them up in an effort to mislead you. I watched them quite often, before they passed, and they were brilliant. I'm very sorry for your loss." She replies.

I take a deep breath and try to clear my head a bit. For a few seconds my hopes were up and I thought that maybe their deaths were staged much like the Priors. I down the rest of my drink and then scan the crowd for Tris again. Everything is blurring together and my head feels extremely foggy.

"Are you ok? Emily asks.

"I can't find my wife." I slur.

"I can help you find her. Come on." She says softly and holds out her hand to me to help me up.

Once I'm standing I feel like the room is tilting a bit and I stumble against Emily as a result. I can feel her put an arm around my waist to help steady me as we begin to walk towards the door.

"Where are we going?" I ask.

"We're getting out of here." She purrs. "Do you want to come to my room?"

"Why?" I ask.

"I've watched you Eric; you were quite the ladies' man back in Dauntless. I was just wondering what it is about you that had so many women wanting you." She replies seductively.

"No." I shake my head and the room feels like its spinning.

"No what?" She asks.

"I'm not like that anymore. I love my wife." I slur.

"What if she didn't know Eric? She's nowhere to be found. We could slip out of here without anyone knowing. Come on let me know you how much fun you can have in the city." She replies.

"No." I reply.

"Eric, you understand that being with Tris taints her. You don't want to do that now do you? She's perfect and you could ruin her." She presses.

"Mmhmm. She is perfect. The love of my life." I feel my head dipping and then a hand under my chin.

"Eric, let's get you out of here. You look like you're about to pass out."

"Mmmhmm." I hum in response.

My head begins to feel heavy as I continue to follow her out of the room. We get to the elevator and she helps me to lean against the wall while we wait for it.

"What are you doing?" Someone asks loudly from next to us. I turn my head to look at the person but they are out of focus.

"None of your business, so move along." Emily replies.

"He's definitely my business." The man says and I feel myself slipping against the wall a bit. "What the hell did you do to him?"

"He's drunk. I'm helping him, leave us alone." She replies.

"Eric, hey man look at me." The man says. I can see him in front of me but I'm unable to recognize who it is.

"Blurry." I slur and I feel him slip an arm under me to help balance me.

"What did you give him?" The man practically yells.

"You should step away if you know what's good for you." Emily says angrily. I can feel myself sliding down the wall and I'm yanked up by two sets of strong hands.

"Who are you? What the hell did you give him?" Someone yells.

"Just a little something that will keep him away from Beatrice Prior and our plans for her." She warns.

"Stay away from him." The man who is helping me says angrily and I feel myself being dragged away before I pass out.

xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx

I feel like I'm burning. Why the hell is it so hot in here? I slowly open my eyes and blink a few times to try to gain some sort of focus. Everything is so fucking bright. There's something in my mouth, I feel like I'm choking. Why can't I get this thing out of my mouth?

"Oh my god, you're awake. Baby, don't pull on that you'll hurt yourself. Hey, look at me." She says. I feel her hands on mine and she has tears trailing out of her hazel eyes. "You're ok." She says soothingly. She presses a button repeatedly on the side of my bed.

"How may I help you?" A voice barks out over a speaker.

"He's awake, please hurry."

"We are on our way."

She looks back down at me and I feel her hand pushing my sweaty hair away from my forehead. She obviously knows who I am but I am struggling to recognize her. My eyes are darting around and I reach for the tube in my mouth again. She quickly moves her hands to mine.

"You can't. They're coming in to help you. Please baby." She murmurs. I wrap my hands around hers and squeeze.

"Hello there Eric, it's nice to see you awake. I'm Dr. Farrar and we're going to get this tube out of your mouth ok?" He says and I blink my eyes rapidly. I watch as he turns to the woman next to me. "You may not want to be here for this part." She looks down at me and I squeeze her hands and hold them tightly.

"You want me to stay?" She asks and I blink at her. She looks up at the doctor. "I'll stay out of your way but I can't leave him."

"Alright, I'm going to have you move to the other side of the room."

I begin to panic as she tries to pull away. I hear machines beeping and I feel a bit lightheaded.

"Hey, look at me, I'm not leaving you ok? Calm down, I promise you I'm staying right here." She says to me and she threads her fingers with mine. She looks at the doctor and nurses in the room. "I'm not leaving his side, work around me." Her voice is hard and authoritative.

The tube removal was just as unpleasant as they described, but now that it's out I feel relieved. I can hear people talking in the room but I can't concentrate. I'm so sleepy.

Off and on I wake up, it could be minutes or it could be days, I can't tell. Every time I do I see her, but I'm too weak to talk to her. She talks to me sometimes and I love the sound of her voice.

Except when she cries, that completely guts me. I want to know who she is. I wish I could concentrate.

xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx

I open my eyes and the room is dark, save the light that shines under the closed door of my room and the moonlight that peeks in through the blinds on the window.

She's in a chair next to my bed, reclined and wrapped in a blanket. Her hair is long and it spills over her shoulders and she has her eyes closed but her rigid posture suggests she's not sleeping. I open my mouth to talk but nothing comes out but a dry rasp. It's enough to cause her to open her eyes and jerk forward.

"Hey, do you need something?" She asks as she stands by my side.

I try to speak again but my mouth is too dry and I start to cough. She pushes my sweaty hair back from my forehead.

"You're too hot." She moves the blankets off of me so only a sheet is covering me. I smile at her. "Your mouth is probably very dry. They said if you woke up and could stay awake they'd let me give you some ice chips. I can go get some."

I shake my head and reach for her.

"You don't want ice chips?" I furrow my brows and shake my head. "You don't want me to leave?" I nod. "Ok, if I can get someone to bring ice chips do you want them?" I nod again. She smiles and presses a button on my bed and when someone answers she asks for ice chips.

I feel my eyes drooping again and I snap them open. I look up and find her staring at me.

"It's ok if you sleep. I won't leave." She says and I shake my head. She runs the fingers of her free hand through my hair and across my scalp and I relax. I refuse to close my eyes.

"Here's some ice chips, remember he has to be able to stay awake to get them. We don't want him choking, especially since we don't know how his swallowing reflex is at the moment." A nurse warns.

"I'm aware, and thank you for bringing this. I'll keep a close eye on him." She replies and with a curt nod the nurse leaves the room.

"Ok baby, we're going to start small. Can you open up?" She asks and I open my mouth. The ice chips feel better than anything I can think of at the moment and I hum a little.

We slowly work our way through the small cup of ice and she never once loses her patience with me. I eventually let her go long enough to get a cool washcloth to put on my head and I finally begin to feel some relief.

"You don't know who I am, do you?" She asks quietly.

I wish I could talk, but every time I try to speak only noises come out. Why can't I form words? I huff in frustration and she begins to run her fingers across my scalp lightly again. She obviously knows how to calm me.

"It's ok. I'm just so happy that you're here. I was so scared baby. I thought I was going to lose you." She whispers. I pick up our entwined hands and press a kiss to hers. I notice her wedding rings so I look down at my left hand and find a matching band. I show it to her and then point at hers.

"You want to know if we're married." She states and I nod. "We are." She replies softly and I sigh happily. I close my eyes and concentrate on the gentle movements of her fingers through my hair.

xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx

I sit as patiently as I can while the nurse takes my vitals. My wife is here, just like she always is, but today she's with two other men who I feel I should know. I couldn't quite keep my eyes open today, but I could hear them talking about me. Something was said about my motor skills and possible brain damage that could cause my inability to speak and issues with my reflexes.

Brain damage? I open my eyes wide and try to talk. Nothing comes out but more noise.

I admit, my memories are all kinds of fucked up and I may not be able to do anything but gesture or grunt but I'm in here. I look over at my wife, who I've learned is named Tris, and she can immediately sense my panic.

"Hey baby, you're awake. It's ok, don't get upset it'll cause your blood pressure to spike." She says softly. I reach for her hand and grip onto it and she bends over and kisses my forehead.

I may not remember everything about our life but I know I love her. She's keeping me sane. The way she looks at me tells me she loves me unconditionally. I have to beat whatever the fuck this is.

I look over at the two men who are hanging back, leaning against the wall as if they're afraid to approach. I tug on Tris' hand and gesture towards them.

"You want to know who they are." She states and I nod. I watch warily as the two approach my bed. "This is my brother Edgar." The tall man with the dark blonde hair and blue eyes extends his hand and I'm able to grasp and shake his hand without trouble.

"It's so good to see you back with us." He says and I can see the sheen of unshed tears in his eyes. Whatever happened to me must have been serious. I nod my head and squeeze his hand before dropping it.

"Baby, this is Edgar's boyfriend Four." Tris says. The dark haired, dark eyed man approaches cautiously. I furrow my brows at him but extend my hand and he shakes it and smiles slightly.

I hold up four fingers and gesture at him, giving him a questioning look. He laughs when he figures out what I'm asking.

"It's a nickname. My given name is Tobias. Can you see why I changed it?" He asks with a good humored laugh and I smile and nod at him.

I squeeze Tris' hand then use my free hand to point at my head. She furrows her brow. "Do you have a headache?" I shake my head. I point at her and then point to Edgar and Four and then back to my ear.

She glances at them and then realization hits her. "You heard us talking?" I nod and she sits next to me on the bed. I put my hand on her thigh and squeeze and she smiles at me. "I know you're ok in there. You don't remember everything, but I know you're still as sharp as a tack. I don't believe the doctors about any of that. You're improving every day baby. The physical therapist is pleased with the motor skill progress you've made. We're going to get you out of this bed soon."

I nod at her and smile and she cups my cheek with her hand. I place my hand on top of hers. I open my mouth to speak.

"I…" I groan in frustration and Tris gently rubs my bearded cheek.

"That's good, you said I and I understood it. What's the next word Eric?" She asks.

"Luhhh. Luhhhhhh." I take a deep breath. "Luhhh…vvvvv…"

"Love?" She asks and I nod.

"You…" I rasp. Her smile breaks and the tears steadily begin to flow down her cheeks. I shake my head and put my hands on hers and she won't look at me. I desperately look at Edgar and Four and they are both smiling.

"Happy tears." Edgar says as he puts his arms around his weeping sister. "Tris, you're worrying him." He warns. She nods her head at me and grasps on to my hands.

"I love you too Eric, more than anything." She says between tears.

I reach up and wipe as many tears as I can from her cheek and she leans into my touch. I shake my head no and point at her wet cheeks. She lets out a shaky laugh.

"They're happy tears baby, I promise you. I'm happy." She replies and I relax a bit.

"She's telling the truth Eric. Believe me, we've seen the unhappy tears. Those are long gone now that you're awake and aware." Edgar says and I see Four nodding next to him.

I nod and point at my ears with a frown. Tris cocks her head to the side. "You could hear me?" She asks and I nod. "It wasn't all tears though, right." She says with a smile and I return it while nodding. "I would tell you how much I love and need you too." I nod along with her words.

"You two are so in sync. You are able to have an entire conversation without him speaking. It's kind of amazing." Four chimes in.

"Yeah." I croak out and everyone smiles at me.

"That was great." Tris says and I grin at her. "Every day it gets better baby."

xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx

They've finally given me a tablet so I can type to communicate with people. Writing wasn't easy for me, even though my motor skills are improving I had a hard time gripping the pen. They said it was normal, and that small objects would be the hardest for me to pick up and grasp.

Tris never leaves although I try to get her to at least take breaks. I desperately want her to stay here, but I don't tell her that. It doesn't matter because she's as stubborn as they come and refuses to budge. I've met more of our friends and through bits and pieces of hushed conversations I've learned there was some sort of agreement that happened right after I was hospitalized. I've tried to leave it at eavesdropping since I have a feeling that Tris doesn't want to discuss whatever has happened, but my curiosity is getting the best of me.

I've been able to walk, with assistance, and I go to physical therapy every day. I've gotten better at forming words with my speech therapy but it's almost as if I just can't force my mouth to say the words that are in my head. I know what I want to say all the time, but I can't coherently form a sentence. I've been frustrated as hell, but my wife is amazing. She always knows what I want or need and she's the best at communicating with me in this state. Today I finally get to take a real shower instead of sponge baths after Tris begged, pleaded and finally told them she'd be in the shower with me to help. She's relentless in her battles for me and I love her even more for it.

She's helped me brush my teeth and trim my beard so far, and now we're in the bathroom where she has finally gotten me undressed and has me sitting on the bench inside the shower. I watch as she undresses, I'm absolutely unable to take my eyes off of her. She's perfect in every way.

"So…beeee…" I can't form the word. She steps inside the shower and crouches in front of me. I reach for her and pull her to my lap and she smiles.

"What are you trying to say baby?" She asks.

"You… are… so…." I stop and think of an easier word. "Pretty." I finally finish and smile. She's beaming at me. "I…love…you…."

"I love you too. " She leans in and kisses me softly and desire takes over as I slip my tongue into her mouth and kiss her deeply. She leans back, breaking our kiss and I enjoy her flushed face and breathlessness. "We definitely can't do that, not until you are feeling up to it." She says.

I point at my very interested and up to the occasion manhood and she laughs at me.

"Well, we know that is working now don't we?" She replies.

"Need…test..." I reply.

"Eric Coulter!" She admonishes and I stick out my lower lip in a pout. "I'll make you a deal, ok?" She asks and I nod eagerly. "You stop giving your physical and speech therapists such hell and start listening to them I will make it worth your while."

"O….k…." I reply and stick out my hand. We shake on the deal and she giggles when I start rubbing my scratchy beard against her neck before placing kisses there. "Tris…" I say carefully and she leans back to look at me. "What… happen…." I try to get more out but words are escaping me.

She shuts her eyes briefly and takes a deep breath. "After the shower." She replies and I furrow my brows at her. "I mean it this time, I will tell you everything. You're finally ready." She replies and I nod.

I spend the rest of the shower touching my wife as much as she'll let me while she takes her time to wash me properly. Sitting on the bench puts me eye level with her perky breasts and I take full advantage. Each time she'd admonish me for touching her inappropriately I'd say 'motor skills', at least the best way I could and she'd laugh at me.

Once she helps me out of the shower and we get dried off I do the best I can getting dressed by myself. The shirt wasn't too bad, but the most difficult thing is gripping the waistbands of my boxer briefs and sweatpants, and Tris patiently let's me try everything on my own and waits for me to ask for help before stepping in. It probably takes us three times longer this way but I love her for it. When I look at the socks she packed me I sigh, knowing that my hands aren't going to cooperate for that kind of task. She smiles at me and simply pulls the socks on my feet.

"Feel...so…" I begin. The word is useless but I can't get the right sound out.

"Don't even think it. You're doing so much better. Every day you're getting stronger." She admonishes.

"What...happen...to...me…?" I ask and she leads me over to the recliner she typically sits in when she's not in bed with me. I sit down and gesture for her to sit on my lap and when she does I wrap my arms around her.

"You were given a serum by someone who was hired to prevent us from being together." She begins. "When Edgar and Four got you to the hospital no one knew what the serum was and you were in bad shape. Your heart stopped several times and you literally had to be brought back from the dead."

She leans her head against my shoulder and I press kisses to her forehead. "Do you remember who David is?" She asks and I shake my head no. "Let me step back, do you remember leaving Chicago?"

We left Chicago? What is she saying? Where are we? My mind is racing and Tris sees the panic on my face. "Hey, look at me, it's ok. Breathe with me." She says softly and we take deep breaths together.

"Do you remember Chicago?" She asks and I nod. I nudge her and point to the tattoos on my neck. "Yes, you were a leader in Dauntless." She replies with a smile and I nod.

"We leave?" I ask slowly and she nods. "Why…?"

She proceeds to tell me about the war, the uprising that followed and the aftermath of her kidnapping to ultimately open the mysterious box. She goes on to explain that the box contained a message from the people outside the wall along with an invitation for us to be with them.

"The serum you were given was twofold: it removed any memory you had of you and I together and it also included a mutated version of the death serum. The leader of the city of Milwaukee, David, used you as a weapon against me. He forced me to watch you forget me, then he was going to allow you to die a slow, painful and downright torturous death unless I cooperated with him." She explains.

She then explains the genetic abnormalities that both she and Four possess, and how the biggest reason they were adamant that we stay apart was because if I were to get her pregnant she would lose her genetic purity. They need her DNA and genetic strain to find a cure for genetic damage, and they forced her cooperation by threatening my life.

"Even though I immediately cooperated the damaging effects of the serum had taken their toll on you, so for the first couple of days no one knew if you'd even live. David had ordered they give you full doses of antiserum around the clock but you were so weak. Your body was in no shape to fight or expel the serum you had been given. So we had to just wait and hope for the best. It was awful baby. You went through so much but you kept fighting. The day you woke up was the happiest day of my life, outside of our wedding day." She says and I lean in and press my lips to hers.

"What...um…" I can't get the words out to ask what he's making her do. She grabs the tablet they've given me and I type the question out.

"He just tests things. They've drawn blood multiple times, I had to do a bone marrow draw in my hip once and that was uncomfortable for a few days. He's also put me back on pregnancy prevention serum, so at least for the next six months we won't be able to try for a baby." She says without meeting my eyes.

"Practice…" I smirk at her and she laughs. As much as I want to have a baby with her right now isn't the right time with everything that's going on with this David person. "Ba...baby…" I say and she looks up at me. "He… let's us...be…?" I gesture back and forth between us.

"He does. I threatened to kill myself if he kept us apart." She says quietly and I turn her to face me completely.

"No…" I shake my head and she puts her hands on either side of my face.

"We're together baby. I made my point." She replies and pulls me in for a kiss.

"How long here…? I ask carefully.

"How long in the hospital?" She asks and I nod. "This is week seven."

I shake my head. I've lost almost two months in this place. She's been stuck in a hospital for that entire time.

"Eric, stop, I can almost hear your thoughts. I love you and I am happy to be here with you because you're alive. I almost lost you, I watched you fading further and further away. I don't care how many nights I spent in that recliner, or how many showers and meals I've missed. I have you. I'm not leaving you for a minute. Everyone else was forced back to Chicago, they had no use for them here. They only wanted Four and me, and as a result they've allowed Edgar and you to stay." She explains. She grabs my tablet and begins typing. I quirk an eyebrow at her and she shows me the screen.

"As soon as you're better we're getting out of here. Zeke already has plans." She's typed.

I nod and she leans her head back on my shoulder and I rest my chin on top of it.

Zeke may have plans, but as for this David person I'm going to kill that bastard myself.


	37. Chapter 37

**AN: Thank you for the reviews, favorites and follows. I appreciate each and every one of you.**

 **Enjoy!**

Tris POV

My hand is stiff and sweaty but I don't dare move it from his. He's finally asleep after having been restless most of the day, all stemming from a fall he took during physical therapy. Eric's been pushing himself to the extreme, his strength has been returning at a much quicker pace than his speech and fine motor skills, but his frustration has been apparent to me in every session. He's been a model patient since our shower promises two weeks ago, but he still feels after being in this hospital for ten weeks he should be much further in his recovery. Today he was adamant that he could walk without any type of assistance, and he proved he could, but when he needed to move quickly to avoid an errant child who was running unattended in the hallway he fell hard. I think his pride is more wounded than anything, but no matter how much I've tried to tell him he did extremely well today all he could focus on was his lack of reaction speed when faced with that situation.

I watch him while he sleeps and for at least a little while he looks completely at ease. His curly hair is wild and sticking up on top, his beard is in need of another trim but he's still the most handsome man I've ever seen. His pale skin contrasts against the black ink of his tattoos along with the black metal of his piercings, and his usual taut muscle tone has been lost a bit due to his reduced activity, but he's still my Eric. His pink lips are slightly parted, and every once in a while he snores lightly which makes me smile since he swears he never snores.

I can't believe how close I came to losing him. I know he doesn't remember everything about us, but somehow he's found a way to still love me. His progress has met the close scrutiny of David and his associates, and Matthew has explained that they believe Eric may be closer to GP than they assumed. His ability to fight this serum has surpassed anything they've ever suspected. They were so adamant that he was damaged and it's appearing that he could be more special than any of us. It makes me want to protect him that much more because I can't imagine him having to go through anything more than what he already has dealt with.

"Hey." A whisper breaks my thoughts and I see Four walk into the room. He sits a large duffel bag on the floor next to my chair. "I brought you both some clean clothes. I'll take the dirty stuff back with me."

"Thank you." I say softly and he smiles.

"How is he?" Four asks.

"Better. The fall from this morning stressed him out but they gave him an anti-anxiety medication and he's finally settled down." I whisper back.

Four nods in acknowledgement and then gestures towards the door. I slowly slip my hand from Eric's and kiss his forehead. I notice that he once again feels warm; a strange side effect from his ordeal has been fevers off and on. I remove the heavier blanket and then follow Four outside the door and into the hallway. Matthew has successfully provided us with a 'dead zone' where no camera or audio can get to us and our group has often taken advantage of it. He's killed audio in Eric's room too, however we try not to discuss too much around Eric. I'm still trying to keep him as sheltered from this as possible.

"They found her body." He whispers and I can feel my stomach drop.

"How?" I choke out and he shakes his head.

"I don't know. We didn't think it was possible. They've already started questioning Edgar." He replies.

"Oh my god, Tobias what do I do?" I whisper.

"You start by staying calm. You are of no use to him if you can't." Four replies gesturing towards Eric's open door.

 _ **Flashback**_

 _I quietly wait in the woods for her knowing that she thinks she is meeting with David. Such a stupid girl, she didn't even bother to confirm before readily agreeing to meet in the middle of fucking nowhere. I watch her cautiously approach the agreed spot, she's nervously looking around and she pulls her coat a little tighter around her body._

 _"David?" She calls out tentatively._

 _I step on a branch and it startles her and she turns to face me. "Hello?" She asks with a curious look on her face._

 _"Hello Emily." I reply. She jumps at the sound of my voice and I glare at her._

 _"Beatrice Prior. I'll be damned. You were awfully brave to come out here alone." She smirks._

 _"Who says I'm alone?" I ask._

 _"Well I know your dear husband isn't here with you." She replies icily._

 _"My husband is lying in a hospital bed right now because of you. He's been there for almost forty eight hours with machines making him breathe and no one fucking knows if he's going to live or die." I reply evenly and all color drains from her face. The smug look she had on her face is quickly replaced with a new one._

 _Fear._

 _"Oh wow, he's actually still alive? Impressive." She replies with a shrug. "Guess I'll have to finish the job." She attempts for nonchalance but I know better. The tension in her body, the way she's pursing her lips and how she has her arms wrapped around herself tightly all betray the emotion she's trying so hard to hide._

 _I pull out my gun and press it to her forehead. Her mask falls immediately and her face crumples in fear._

 _"Not so fucking brave now, are you bitch?" I sneer._

 _"Please don't hurt me." She cries._

 _"Emily if you tell me the truth right now I'll let you live. I don't want to hurt you; I want to help you."_

 _"No, I can't…." she is almost choking on her tears._

 _"You will tell me the truth Emily even if you think it's not something I want to hear. Because if you don't your fucking brains are going to be splattered all over these nice pretty trees around us." I say in a quiet voice._

 _"Please don't…." She cries._

 _"I'm going to count to three Emily, one, two…."_

 _"I'll tell you everything, please!" She begs._

 _"Talk now!" I yell._

 _"David was afraid that Eric would taint your purity. He paid me to keep you apart and told me to do whatever I had to do it. He told me the serum was just to make Eric feel intoxicated, and I thought that I could seduce him. I was going to take pictures and show you, I thought if you believed he'd returned to his old ways you'd leave him yourself. I watched you in Chicago and I knew his past with women bothered you…" She cries harder. "Please don't hurt me."_

 _"Oh Emily, you poor confused girl." I shake my head at her. "You're beautiful, I'll give you that, and I'm sure you have quite the sex appeal. However, you are a fool to think that my husband would EVER cheat on me, drugged or not. You see, what you have on the outside doesn't mean shit if you're ugly on the inside. You knew what was in that serum didn't you? Tell me the truth Emily. Give me a reason to spare your life!" I hiss._

 _"Yes, I knew what it was." She cries harder._

 _"Is there an antiserum for it? An antidote?" I demand._

 _"I don't know. David's never used it before." She says in between tears._

 _"You wanted to kill my husband, didn't you?"_

 _"No, please…." She begs._

 _"Don't fucking lie to me!" I scream and she cowers. "Get on your fucking knees." I growl and she lowers herself in front of me._

 _"What can they do to save him Emily? What do you know about that serum?" I ask._

 _"All I know is it's some sort of new memory serum and a new death serum. The memory serum is programmed to target specific memories. David erased you from Eric's mind. This version of the death serum is a slow release, it's made to torture its victim. There's not a cure, so whatever David has promised you is a lie." She replies angrily. "If you're going to shoot me just fucking do it."_

 _"Look at me Emily." I reply. She raises her bloodshot eyes to me. "Do you really think I'd hurt you? You've watched me for years haven't you?"_

 _"No you won't hurt me." She whispers. "You're not a violent person."_

 _"You're right Emily, I'm typically not violent at all. You probably saw me stop my husband from shooting Four, honestly in a position very similar to the one we are in right now. Did you see that?" I ask._

 _"I did. I saw how angry he was and how you told him not to let himself become someone he's not." She says in a hurried voice._

 _"You paid close attention to us didn't you?" I ask._

 _"Yes. The two of you were very interesting to watch. The love you have for each other." She says. "Please can you take your gun away from my head, you're better than this Tris. I won't tell anyone about this I swear. I have just as much to lose by telling you what I did about the serum. Please let me go. You're a good person and you never resort to unnecessary violence."_

 _"You're right Emily, I'd never resort to unnecessary violence. But, there are circumstances where violence becomes necessary." I reply as I move the gun away from her. She sighs in relief._

 _"Thank you." She says quietly._

 _"You shouldn't thank me, because you're about to learn when violence becomes necessary for me. It's when you fuck with the people I love." I reply as I point the gun at her head and pull the trigger._

 _ **End** **Flashback**_

"I have to help Edgar. I can't let him do this…."

"Tris, look at me." He has his hands on my arms and I finally lift my eyes towards him. "Edgar is fine. You don't understand how conditioned the factionless are to lie for their own protection. He is fine, he wasn't even nervous when they picked him up. They'll want to question me next, only because they know that Edgar and I are who rescued Eric from her. No one knows you left the hospital Tris. They've seen you here around the clock; even when David needs you he does his procedures here. We will protect you."

"But what if…"

"Tris, we have you. I need you to go back in there with your husband and you act like nothing has happened. We love you and we will protect you, I promise you." He says quietly.

"What if they want to talk to me?" I ask.

"You know nothing. Just like Edgar and I know nothing. There is not a damn thing to trace any of us back to that." He replies.

"But you both helped hide…"

"Nothing Tris, not a trace. Even with finding the body, nothing." He replies softly.

I hear a cough coming from Eric's room and Four and I walk back in. Eric smiles when he sees the two of us. I sit on the bed next to him and he grabs my hand and kisses it.

"Hi." He says.

"Hey man, you're sounding much better." Four replies.

"Speech therapy." Eric says slowly. "Helping... a lot. Where's Edgar?"

Four darts his eyes to me briefly and then looks at Eric. "He got held up with Nita. I'm sure he'll be by later."

"She needs break." Eric says as he gestures to me.

"You know better than that, I'm not going anywhere. Four brought us some clean clothes." I reply with a smile.

"Thank you." Eric says to Four.

"It's no problem. Seriously man you sound good. It's a big difference from the past couple of weeks." He replies.

"He's been much nicer to his therapists and he's been following their instructions. It definitely shows." I reply.

"She promised sex if I be…behave…." Eric replies with a grin.

"Eric!" I admonish.

"Did she keep her promise?" Four asks with a chuckle.

"Every…day." Eric replies with a laugh. "I lo…love…shower time."

I can feel my neck and face heat up and I'm sure I'm as red as a tomato which makes the two of them laugh even harder at me. Eric pulls me towards him and captures my lips in a quick kiss.

"I love you." He says without hesitation. I smile at him.

"I love you too. You do sound so much better." I reply.

"You are very mot.. motivating." He replies with a smirk before kissing me again, not caring that Four is in the room.

"Quit making out." I hear my brother say as he walks in the door. "Hey brother, looking good." He says as he shakes hands with Eric.

"Feel…good." He replies with a nod.

"Hey baby sis." Edgar says as he kisses my forehead. I look for any sign of stress and he seems relaxed and calm.

"Hey yourself." I reply. He smiles at me before heading over to Four and planting a kiss on his lips.

I lean into Eric's chest and he wraps his arms around me as he carries on a conversation with Edgar and Four. My mind wanders and I worry about what happened with Edgar today. He seems totally relaxed and at ease, laughing with Eric and sharing affectionate touches with Four.

I've never killed anyone before and when I made the plans to meet with Emily that hadn't been my intent. Something inside of me just snapped when I realized how casual she could be about almost killing the man I love. Those first few days that Eric was in the hospital were the lowest points of my life so far, because even after the hell I've been through this past year nothing could prepare me for possibly losing the love of my life. Eric is so much more than my husband, he's my best friend. He's my lover, my confidant, my protector and he believes in me without hesitation.

"Tris…" Edgar says as he waves a hand in front of me. "Did you hear what he just said?"

"No, sorry I was zoned out. What did you say baby?" I ask Eric.

"I made joke.. being friends with your ex…what's the.. big… d… deal?" He asks.

"Wait, what?" I ask.

"Exactly." Edgar says.

"What am…I….missing?" Eric asks.

I turn so I'm facing him and take both of his hands in mine. "Baby, who are you talking about being my ex?"

"Number boy." He says with a confused look. "Why are you all so… surprised?"

"You remember that I dated Four?" I ask. He nods. I look back at Edgar and Four excitedly before turning back to Eric.

"How did we meet?" I ask.

"You jump…first." He replies.

"When did you fall in love with me?" I ask tentatively.

He glances over at Four before meeting my eyes again. "Willow…tree. During se…ses…" He crinkles his brow and sighs. "When you were working...on...that tattoo." He says slowly.

"Tell me your favorite part of our wedding day." I prod and he grins at me.

"In front of them?" He gestures towards Four and Edgar and chuckles. I nod. "There are… two… first the way you… look… coming down the aisle." He takes a deep breath and he has a look of concentration. "Sec.. sec.. " He huffs in frustration.

I squeeze his hands. "You're doing great baby, just take your time." I can feel the tears threatening to fall.

"Two… tattoo shop." He gives me a wicked grin.

"Oh my god." I whisper. "You remember."

I'm overcome with emotion and Eric pulls me tight against his chest. He's rubbing his hands up and down my back and I'm doing everything I can to stop crying but the tears just won't stop.

"Eric how did we meet?" Edgar asks.

"Candor. You brought her back… to me. You save… her life." He replies.

"What about me?" Four asks.

"Init… init… training." He finally says. "Baby don't cry." He says as he presses kisses to my head.

I lean back and look at him. "You remember me? You remember us?"

He nods his head and regards me curiously with that adorable Erudite expression he often wears. "I...didn't know I forgot." He says slowly.

"You had forgotten everything that had to do with me. They wiped your memories of me with the serum you were given." I reply.

"Baby I will never…forget…you. I love you. You are…my…best friend." He leans towards me and kisses me soundly.

"I think he may be ready for his shower." Four smirks and I glare at him.

"Technically, you can shower alone now. You were cleared you know." I smirk at Eric and he gives me a dirty look.

"Like hell woman." He scowls.

"Baby, I want to catch up with my brother. Would you be ok with Four for a little while?" I ask and he rolls his eyes.

"He's gotten tol..tolerable." He replies with his smirk in place. I kiss him and nibble on his lip ring before sliding off his bed and gesturing for Edgar to step outside with me.

We head to our usual spot and Edgar immediately speaks.

"They might not even question Tobias. They seemed satisfied with my answers." He says quietly.

"What did they ask? Edgar I'm scared." I reply.

"Don't be, you have a solid alibi because as far as they know you were here the whole day. Tris, it's fine. Matthew and Nita covered it all with looped camera footage. They have nothing on any of us." He replies.

"I shouldn't have…" I begin and Edgar places his finger across my lips.

"Yes, you should have. She got exactly what she deserved and you had no idea if she would try to come back to finish the job. Tris, I know you. While I know love keeps you here by his side, I also suspect that you've been afraid to leave him. We are going to get away from this place and that maniac is going down." He replies.

"The plan is set?" I ask.

"Already in motion. All we need is for Eric to be well enough to leave." He replies.

"The doctor told me he may need speech and physical therapy for months after they discharge him. How am I going to get him away from here Edgar?"

"They have what he needs in Erudite too Tris." Edgar replies easily. "When do they think he can leave?"

"Within the next couple of days as long as he commits to coming back in for his therapy."

"We will be ready." He replies.

I nod at Edgar and then we turn back towards the door. I stop suddenly and gesture to Edgar to be quiet.

"I worry about her…she never le…leaves." Eric says quietly.

"She doesn't want to. You almost died, I don't think you realize how close you were to dying man. It got to her, she was dark. Depressed. Not eating or drinking, not showering, not sleeping. She was afraid if she took her eyes off of you for one second you'd be gone." Four explains. "Eric, if it was Edgar in that bed I'd be right by his side like Tris is for you. That's what you do for the person you love."

I look back at Edgar and he has a slight smile on his face.

"I take it you've not said that to each other yet." I whisper and he shakes his head no.

"But I've wanted to." He whispers back and I smile at him.

"Where are her parents?" Eric asks slowly.

"They disappeared right after you were drugged. We suspect that they were heavily involved in the plans to drug you." He replies.

"How is she...han..han.." Eric stops and is clearly frustrated.

"I think it attributed to that dark place she was in. Since then she's not talked about them at all." He replies.

"There's something I need...you to do." Eric says to Four.

"Anything." He nods.

"The woman who...did...this to...me. I want her...dead. She may...hurt...my wife...I can't...protect her in here." Eric says.

Four takes a deep breath and then sees me in the doorway. I nod at him and make my way back to Eric.

"She's gone." I say to Eric and he frowns at me.

"She left with your...parents?" He asks.

"No." I shake my head. "Baby I need you to promise to stay calm, the camera still works in here even though the audio is off." I reply.

"I promise." He replies. He takes my hands in his.

"She's dead." I whisper. Eric opens his mouth to speak but I shake my head. "I killed her."

The look on his face reminds me of the tough as nails leader I met almost two years ago. His eyes are cold and his mouth is set in a firm line.

"Please don't be angry with me." I say quietly. His expression softens.

"You did...exactly what...I would have done. I'm not mad...I'm pr…pr…pr…" He slams his head back on the bed in frustration.

"Proud." Four finishes for him and Eric nods in agreement.

"Very." Eric adds.

Nothing more is said about Emily or what I did. Conversation flows between all of us and Eric is more relaxed tonight than he's been in a very long time. He's moved his bed into a sitting position and we've been cuddled there together the entire evening. If it weren't for the surroundings you'd think we were back in Dauntless just hanging out.

Four and Edgar say their goodbyes and Eric and I just sit together quietly. He's idly rubbing his hand up and down my arm and I'm snuggled in the crook of his neck placing the occasional kiss there.

"Knock knock." Dr. Farrar says before coming in. "How are you both this evening?"

"Good. You're here awfully late." I remark and he smiles at me.

"You two are going home tonight." He replies.

"I'm getting discharged...now…?" Eric asks.

"You're going _home_." The doctor replies emphasizing the word home. "The audio is still off, but we are going to make this believable. There's a car waiting out of the loading dock entrance for you. We already have Edgar and Tobias. They are taking you back to Chicago. Christina and Marlene have hacked the cameras and shut down all Chicago city cameras. If David tries to get the cameras working, which we know he will, it'll deploy a sophisticated virus and destroy ALL camera feeds and computer equipment. That's your cue to strike."

"Oh my god, you're with us?" I ask.

"Indeed. I'll be getting to Chicago once the distraction is in place. You two will follow nurse Denise out to the loading dock. Be careful, and I'll be seeing you soon." Dr. Farrar says.

"Thank you Dr. Farrar." I reply.

"My name is Scott, and no thanks are needed." He replies.

"You saved..my… life." Eric replies and I can see the emotions on his face.

"I'm sure you'll repay the favor one day." He replies with a genuine smile. "For what it's worth it was my pleasure to take care of you. Eric you defied all odds." He hands Eric a canvas bag. "Here, I've put all of your medications in here. The three bottles of pills are the two antibiotics we've had you on while you were in here plus your pain pills. Follow the instructions on the labels." He then holds up a vial of a bright blue liquid. "This is a concentrated version of the antiserum. It'll taste like hell and there's a good chance it'll make you feel like crap because of the dosage but keep taking it. You drink one of these a day, every day. I mean it, do not miss a dose of any of your medications. I've reached out to a former colleague of mine, Dr. Chase Merced in Erudite. He will be your physical therapist, and he is arranging for speech therapy too. He will also be able to refill any of these prescriptions just in case I'm unable to get there before you need them. Eric you're not out of the woods, it's imperative that you continue with all of your medications and therapies. Also, if you start to feel worse, or if the fevers worsen, the pain increases, motor skills loss, anything unusual you must go to the hospital."

"Scott, is it really safe for him to leave?" I ask.

"It will be safer in Chicago for him than here. David is ready to start testing and experimenting on him and he was pressuring me to clear him." He turns towards Eric before continuing. "The way you've beat the serums has caught his attention and he's been following your recovery closely. I don't trust that he will continue to be patient, that's why I reached out to Zeke and gave him the signal to start the plan." He replies.

"Will you be...safe?" Eric asks.

"I will be. Go. I'll see you both soon." He replies.

I grab our duffle bag, the medication bag and Eric's hand as we make our way down the hallway following Denise. Once we get to the loading dock she turns towards us.

"Be careful, and be brave." She says with a smile and offers us each a quick hug before retreating back into the hospital. I watch as the driver's side door opens to the large SUV and Peter steps out.

"Peter!" I exclaim running towards him. He gathers me in his arms and squeezes me tight.

"Fucking hell Stiff, I've missed the shit out of you." He says. He walks over to Eric and the two embrace. "We thought you were a goner. I've never been so fucking happy to see your ugly mug."

"Fuck you...too Hayes." He scoffs and the two embrace again.

"I know we can't separate the two of you so both of you in front with me. The other lovebirds are in the back. Let's blow this popsicle stand kids!" Peter says as he heads back behind the wheel. I help Eric balance while he climbs into the SUV and I crawl onto his lap. I drag the seat belt around the two of us and Eric wraps his arms tightly around me as Peter begins the drive home.

I'm filled with nervous energy for the beginning of the trip and I can't sit still as a result. My fidgeting eventually gets the attention of my husband and he leans in towards my ear.

"I didn't get my...shower tonight." He whispers.

"We still have time." I whisper back. I feel his tongue dragging slowly around my ear until he takes the lobe in his mouth and gently sucks. I hold back a moan and shift slightly on his lap.

"If...you keep moving I may just...have Peter pull...over." He whispers.

"No way, we haven't had a bed in over two months." I whisper back and he moans slightly in my ear.

"You two are gross." Peter says from beside us.

"Drive faster." Eric says before kissing my neck.

Peter takes Eric's demand to heart and we make it back to Dauntless rather quickly. Even with the late hour we are welcomed by Zeke, Shauna, Marlene, Uriah, Christina, Will, Edward, Lynn, Tori, Bud, George and Amar. There's a pretty dark haired girl standing with Christina and I notice Peter kissing her out of the corner of my eye. I'll definitely have to ask him about her, but later. Everyone hugs Edgar, Four, Eric and me and I notice the immediate concern on Zeke's face when he and Eric begin to walk towards a bench. Zeke catches my eye and gestures for me to come over.

"Tris, it's great to see you. I think this may be a little overwhelming for him." Zeke says as he follows me to where Eric is sitting.

"Hey baby." I say softly as I crouch in front of him. He meets my eyes and smiles.

"Got...dizzy just needed...to...sit…..down. I'm ok." He replies.

"Well I will sit with you until you feel like walking home." I reply before sitting next to him. He immediately wraps his arms around me and nuzzles his face in my neck. "Zeke, there's a small canvas bag with the Milwaukee hospital logo on it, could you bring that to me? Eric has medication he needs to take."

Zeke nods his head and heads toward the SUV. He comes back with the bag and with Edgar and Four in tow. Christina and Will are close behind them.

"We're going to take your bags inside. Is there somewhere in particular we should stay?" Edgar asks Zeke and he nods.

"The Coulter's have the same apartment, and you two still share with Peter and now Daphne too." Zeke says as he nods towards the girl who must be Peter's girlfriend. "There are plenty of single apartments available whenever you're ready to move."

"Ok, thanks. Codes still the same?" Four asks and Zeke nods. Four looks at me. "Take your time, we will put your bag inside your apartment."

"Thank you." I reply. I feel Eric's even breathing and I realize he must be asleep. "Baby, I need you to take your medicine." I say as I gently move him.

"Yeah...sorry baby...I got tired...fast." He replies. I unscrew the cap from the antiserum and he takes it back like a shot. "Fuck...that...nasty." He says.

"We can help you get back to your apartment." Will offers and I see the dark look on Eric's face.

"I'm not dis...dis...disabled." Eric says angrily. I turn to face him.

"Hey, no one said you are. This is a lot on you, we've been in a hospital for two and a half months with your movements controlled. I think that Will and Chris not only missed us but they also want to spend the few extra minutes with us. That's all my love." I reply. I press my lips to his forehead and feel he's burning up. "The fevers back baby." I say quietly and he nods against me. "Can you let Will help you walk home? You're not disabled baby, you're just weak from the fever right now."

"Ok." Eric finally says and he takes Will's extended hand. Christina looks at me with a sympathetic expression as Will tries to steady Eric.

"Tris?" Eric calls and I move to his side.

"I'm right here." I reply as he slips his free arm around my shoulder. I press my body close to his the way I know he likes and we make the trek back to our apartment.

"I cleaned it right before you all got here. I also stocked your groceries too. Will and I moved right next door to you two, so if you need our help we'll be right there." Christina says as we help Eric sit down on the couch.

I hug Christina hard and whisper in her ear. "Thank you so much. I love you Chris."

"I love you too." She squeezes back and we bid our good nights.

I turn my attention to my husband and find him watching me with a slight smile.

"As much as I was looking forward to using our bed for other fun activities I think tonight it's best we use it for sleep only." I remark and he nods. I rummage through our duffel bag until I find some comfortable clothes for the two of us. Eric changes on his own and I take one of his tshirts out of the bag and change into that before leading him to our bedroom.

Lying in that big bed, _our_ big bed, with our bodies pressed together and our arms and legs intertwined makes me feel at ease, even though I know that the situation we're in is anything but ideal. David will soon know, if he doesn't already, that we've left Milwaukee. He'll be working non stop to restore camera activity.

Christina told me that it will likely take days or even weeks for him to break through whatever she and Marlene have done, and then the virus will spread like wildfire. I'm proud of Chris, the girl everyone pegged to be a shopkeeper for the rest of her life has a true knack for technology that puts even Four's impressive skills to shame. Marlene is just as savvy with her ability to hack into even the most complicated systems.

"Baby…" Eric says from behind me.

"I thought you were sleeping." I reply.

"I was. I'm not...anymore...love." He rasps. "I'm hungry."

I move slightly out of his embrace. "Oh, Chris said she stocked our groceries. Let me see what I can make you."

"Not that kind...of hun...hungry." He replies.

He moves so he's on top of me, it's so fast that I'm too shocked to speak before he begins passionately kissing me. He's trying to pull my tshirt up but his hands aren't cooperating and I can sense his frustration.

"Let me help." I whisper before slipping the shirt over my head. I yank his up too and I begin pushing his shorts down while he attacks my neck. Once I have him naked he pushes me back on the bed.

He tries to pull my panties down but his hands are once again frustrating him. I look up at him through my hooded eyes.

"Use your teeth." I whisper and his eyes darken as he takes my suggestion and pulls my panties down using his mouth. I kick them the rest of the way off and Eric parts my legs before lowering his mouth to my overeager core.

"Oh fuck." I say as he starts to gently suck on my clit.

"So hungry. Starving." He purrs as he devours me. It's been too long since he's been able to do this and we are both thoroughly enjoying it.

He desperately wants to slip his fingers inside of me but he just can't find a way to make it work. I can sense his hesitation and I gently tug his hair to get his attention.

"Fuck me." I say once he meets my eyes.

"I don't...know...if I can...take… control." He says.

"Eric, fuck me now." I command and he crawls up my body and leans back on his knees. I grasp his cock and line him up with me and he slams inside of me. He closes his eyes briefly and then he moves my legs so they are wrapped around him and begins a hard and fast pace. He suddenly stops and I notice his eyes are clamped shut.

"Baby, are you ok? What's wrong?" I ask. He opens his eyes and smiles at me.

"Turn over." He commands.

I move out from under him and flip to my stomach. As I'm about to rise to my hands and knees I feel him pushing against me. He slides into my wet center and begins pounding into me.

"Oh Eric…" I call out over and over.

"You like...that...baby?" He pants. I hum in approval. "You're so...tight this...way." He groans.

All I can hear is our grunts and moans and the sound of our bodies smacking against each other. As soon as I start to feel a tightening in my belly and the telltale signs of an orgasm Eric's pace begins getting erratic.

"Tris..I'm gonna...cum…" he moans as my walls clench around him. "Tris, yes!" He yells as he spills inside of me. His sweaty body slumps against mine and his heavy breathing blows against my neck. The weight of him pressed against me is the best thing I've felt in such a long time.

"Baby I'm crush...crushing you." He pants.

"Don't you dare move." I reply and he relaxes against me and presses kisses to my shoulders and back. "I've missed this so much. I've missed the way your body feels pressed into mine. The way our skin feels when we're together like this. I've missed your weight against me while you try to catch your breath. I've missed the way our bodies slide together. I've missed the way it feels when you breathe into my neck. Don't you fucking move." I say as I fight the tears that are threatening to spill.

Eric doesn't move, he just covers me entirely with his body and nuzzles into my neck. I feel his warm breath each time he exhales.

"I've never loved anyone...but you. I...never will. Thank...you...for never leav..leaving...my side. Thank...you...for loving me...so much. Thank you for...believing in me when...others didn't….I love...you so...much baby." He whispers against my neck.

"Thank you for fighting your way back to me." I reply quietly. Eric shifts his body weight and we lay facing each other with our bodies pressed together. "I love you so much."

"Baby what...if...I never get...better?" Eric asks in a quiet voice.

"You've already gotten so much better. Eric, you defied all odds by beating that serum. It was literally a poison designed to wipe me from your memories and then to torture you with a slow and painful death. You couldn't breathe on your own, and when you woke up and they removed the tube you still were in and out of consciousness for over a week. You couldn't talk, but you beat that. You couldn't remember me, you beat that. You couldn't walk at all, beat it. You couldn't grip _anything_ and now you've only got problems with smaller items, your fingers wouldn't work at all baby but now you're only having small motor skills issues. Every day you've defied the odds and improved. I have ever confidence that you will continue to improve. But, to answer your question if this is it I don't care because I love you so damn much. You are here with me, physically, mentally and emotionally again. I have everything I need right here."

When I meet his eyes I can see tears trailing out of them. I gently wipe them away and he takes a few minutes to compose himself.

"I don't know...what I...ever did right in my...life...to deserve you but I'm...thank...thankful every day for...you." He whispers.

"Me too baby." I whisper back. We lay together, bare skin to bare skin, our bodies completely sated and entwined until we both fall asleep.


	38. Chapter 38

**AN: It's been over a month... I know... I have no good excuse. Thank you all for supporting me and following through my erratic posting schedule. Real life has been happening, but I haven't forgotten any of you, or our poor tortured couple.**

Tris POV

 ** _Flashback_**

 _"_ _He's doing it again." Christina says as she nudges my shoulder with hers. I look at her and she glances over across the Pit where Eric is leaning against the bar drinking his whiskey and scanning his eyes across the crowd._

 _"_ _Doing what?" I ask as I sip on my own whiskey. Christina rolls her eyes and shakes her head._

 _"_ _You can't tell me there is nothing going on between the two of you. He's been eye fucking you all night." Christina says._

 _I look across the Pit and immediately meet his grey eyes. He never breaks eye contact as he brings his glass to his lips and drains its contents. He signals the bartender for another while watching me and a slight nod of his head gestures for me to come over. After what happened a few hours earlier in the tattoo shop, going over to Eric is the last thing I should be doing._

 _"_ _Go." Christina whispers._

 _"_ _Wait, why? You hate him." I argue._

 _"_ _I don't hate him per se; I actually think he may be a better person than we've given him credit for. I've heard some rumors." She offers and I turn my full attention to her._

 _"_ _What kind of rumors?" I ask._

 _"_ _I've heard he's not the compliant puppy dog that it's widely believed he is." Christina replies. Her words are slurring and it's obvious by the vacant look on her face that she's drunk. She looks at me and giggles. "Besides, he's so fucking hot; don't you want to at least get a taste?"_

 _"_ _You think Eric's hot?" I look at her and don't make any attempt to hide my shock._

 _"_ _Yeah, he's hot as hell." Christina nods while licking her lips. "Look, this is girl code here. Four's been sneaking around doing god knows what, you've been apprehensive as hell for weeks in your relationship with him and it's been obvious that you and Captain Scarypants over there have some sort of weird obsession with each other. Go over there. Talk to him, kick his ass, fuck him, do whatever. Get it out of your system, or get it into your system. Just be happy Tris." She holds her glass up and I clink mine against it._

 _"_ _Will you be ok?" I ask as I glance over at Eric again. As expected, his eyes are already on me._

 _"_ _Yup, Will's on his way. Go, get you some. Girl code." Chris slurs as she hooks her pinky with mine. I giggle as she pushes me away._

 _I walk over to where Eric is standing and take in the slight smirk on his face. He pulls out a stool and gestures for me to sit. I arch my eyebrow at him._

 _"_ _I can stand if you're going to continue to do so." I say evenly. He smiles slightly before pulling another stool out and sitting down._

 _"_ _Better?" He asks and I nod. He gestures at the bartender and two glasses of whiskey are quickly set down on the bar in front of us. The bartender winks at me, and he quickly gets a glare and growl from Eric that sends him scurrying on his way._

 _"_ _Why did you want me to come over here? Isn't this entirely too public for you?" I ask._

 _"_ _Isn't it too public for you? Don't you worry that number boy will see you consorting with the enemy?" He counters._

 _I roll my eyes at him. "What do you want Eric?"_

 _"_ _You." He answers without skipping a beat._

 _"_ _Great, another one of your drunken confessions, seriously you're giving me whiplash." I shake my head as I drink the whiskey. He smirks at me as he sips on the whiskey in his glass._

 _"_ _I'm not drunk. Let's get out of here." He replies._

 _"_ _I'm not fucking you." I state and he almost chokes on his drink. He coughs a few times as I drain my own glass._

 _"_ _Jesus Tris, a little warning. I didn't ask you to fuck me, not yet at least." He replies with a smirk. "Let's just go somewhere other than here. We can go wherever you want."_

 _I study his face and narrow my eyes at him. "Teach me to fight."_

 _He stands up and offers me his hand, which I accept. He doesn't drop my hand as he leads me from the bar; instead he laces our fingers together and walks towards the training room. I can't deny the electricity I feel from our entwined hands. I know Four could see us from the control room if he happened to be watching the right cameras but for some reason I no longer care. He's been acting very suspiciously for weeks now and I don't even know if our relationship will survive any further mistrust between us, nor am I sure I even care. Besides, if Four was actually watching me on the cameras he'd have definitely come and found me after the heated kisses Eric and I shared just a few hours ago in the tattoo shop._

 _Maybe I want him to see me with Eric._

 _Once we're inside of the leader's training room I watch as Eric pulls his shirt over his head. I've seen him many times without a shirt while working on his tattoo, but his body never ceases to amaze me. He has the perfect muscle tone, his chest is chiseled and his six pack prominent. He's masculine, with hair on his chest and a trail down his stomach that I visually trace each time I see it, allowing my mind to wander to where that trail ends._

 _"_ _You're overdressed." He purrs. I realize he's caught me staring at his chest and I can feel the blush on my cheeks._

 _"_ _I have nothing to change into." I argue._

 _He grabs my hand and laces our fingers together again before he punches a code into another door and he leads me into the room. There are clothes, shoes and various other training materials inside this small room._

 _"_ _Take your pick." He replies as he gestures around the room with his free hand. He squeezes our entwined hands before stroking his thumb across the back of my hand. "I'll give you some privacy." He murmurs before reluctantly dropping my hand. He ducks out of the room and I change into some tight training shorts and a sports bra. I probably shouldn't be showing so much skin around Eric, especially since he's dropped hints that he's attracted to me, but today I just don't give a shit._

 _I walk back into the training room and Eric is warming up at a bag. His back is to me, shirt off with a pair of basketball shorts hanging dangerously low on his lean hips. I could watch his back for eternity. I've never thought of that part of someone's body as sexy but Eric's muscle tone, pale skin, the smattering of tattoos across it and the glisten of sweat all does something to me._

 _"_ _Are you here to stare or are you here to train?" He asks without facing me._

 _"_ _How'd you even know I was back here?" I ask._

 _"_ _I'm always aware of you Stiff." He offers simply. "Warm up."_

 _I take my place at the bag next to him and I hear him mutter "Holy fuck" under his breath. I smirk but continue my assault on my bag without acknowledging him. I'm aware that he has stopped working and is just standing there watching me._

 _"_ _See something you like?" I ask._

 _"_ _Fuck yes I do. God dammit Tris, how can you come out here looking like that?"_

 _"_ _Like what?" I ask while raising a shoulder in a shrug. I'm quickly turned around and before I can even blink he has me pressed flat against the wall while his chest is pressed into my back._

 _"_ _You are playing with fire Stiff." He growls._

 _"_ _I'm not afraid to get burned." I counter while trying to turn my head enough to see him._

 _I think back to last night and the way he finally started opening up. He told me he wanted me to leave Four and also insinuated he wanted me to be with him. I tried talking to him this morning in his office, but he yelled at me and told me to leave him alone. Typical Eric. It wasn't until our earlier encounter in the tattoo shop that I became more aware of Eric's growing affection for me._

 _"_ _You are deadly sexy." He purrs. He presses harder against my back and I do everything I can to not react to how much I am enjoying our closeness. "Think you can get away Tris?" He whispers with his lips brushing against my ear._

 _"_ _I could if I wanted to." I reply without thinking._

 _"_ _So, you're telling me you don't want to get away from me?" He asks._

 _The door to the room opens slowly and we break apart. An elder leader who I don't recognize ambles in, shooting a look of disdain towards Eric._

 _"_ _Why is she here?" He asks._

 _"_ _She's with me Xander." Eric replies tersely._

 _"_ _You can't bring your girlfriend in here Eric. This isn't where you bring your dates." The leader I now know as Xander turns towards me. "You need to go."_

 _"_ _Xander, fuck off. I can bring her wherever I want. We're in here training, not fucking." Eric growls._

 _"_ _Eric, its fine, I can go; besides I don't want to break any rules. I'll just need to grab my clothes." I reply and I move towards the locked room. Eric follows behind me and punches in the code. He walks into the room with me and closes the door behind us._

 _"_ _I'm sorry about him. He's an asshole, and the older he gets the worse he is." Eric says. I can't hide the shock on my face. "What?" he asks._

 _"_ _You just apologized to me." I reply._

 _"_ _He was being a jerk to you." He shrugs before grabbing my hand in his again._

 _"_ _You're usually a jerk to me and you don't ever apologize for it." I counter. I brace myself for his wrath but instead I get a legitimate laugh from him. God, he is beautiful when he smiles._

 _"_ _Can we talk about what happened earlier?" He asks._

 _The kisses – those fucking amazing kisses….._

 _"_ _What do you mean?" I ask lamely. Eric pushes me against the wall and begins kissing me before I can protest. I feel him pulling my sports bra up and I lift my arms so he can pull it over my head. The heated feel of his skin against mine causes goose bumps to rise on my arms. I can feel the coolness of his nipple rings pressing against my chest and I can guarantee he can feel my hard nipples against his._

 _He grinds against my heated core and I can finally feel exactly how big he is. All I can think about is having him inside of me and I run my hands down the sides of his body until I reach the waist of the thin basketball shorts he's wearing. I begin to push them down his hips and he growls into our kiss._

 _"_ _Tris…" He whispers huskily as I run my fingers up and down the smooth hot skin of his freed manhood. "I don't want to do this here."_

 _His statement causes me to pause and he kisses me deeply before pulling his face slightly away from mine. His intense grey eyes never leave mine._

 _"_ _You don't want me?" I ask in an unsure voice._

 _He kisses me again before resting his forehead against mine._

 _"_ _I want everything with you." He whispers. "I want every part of you and I want it forever."_

 _"_ _Eric…"_

 _"_ _Let me finish. I have one shot at this before all hell breaks loose. You already know what's about to happen, you and number boy have been snooping all around it and I know you have figured it out. Please just hear me out. I'm terrible at this…" He stops talking and I lean up and capture his lips with my own, initiating a kiss between us for the first time. He grinds against my hand that's still wrapped around him and moans loudly. We hear the slam of weights hitting the floor in the training room and Eric chuckles against me._

 _"_ _I'm not part of it." He finally says. "I know you think that I'm part of this war with Jeanine but I'm not and I will do everything in my power to protect you."_

 _"_ _What?" I stutter. "Why?"_

 _"_ _I love you. I love everything about you and we will be happy Tris, once this is done we will be free."_

 _I drop my hands away from Eric and try to move. He presses his body against mine._

 _"_ _No, don't run baby please. It's taken me months to gather the courage to say anything. Please…."_

 _A loud banging on the door interrupts him and he curses loudly before yelling. "Xander, leave me alone for fucks sake!"_

 _"_ _This isn't Xander. What are you doing in there?" Max's voice booms through the closed door and I briefly catch the fear pass across Eric's features. "Jeanine is in my office waiting. So finish up whatever or whoever you have in there and hurry the fuck up." He adds with a touch of humor in his voice._

 _"_ _I'll be there shortly." Eric replies gruffly. He drops his face towards mine and captures my lips in a brief kiss while pulling his shorts back into place. He drops kisses down my neck and across my naked breasts before helping me slip his previously discarded t-shirt over my head._

 _"_ _Eric, I can't deal with the hot and cold from you." I finally say._

 _"_ _No more of the back and forth Tris, I can promise you that. I want you. I've tried to wait for you but I can't anymore. I need you to be with me. I meant it when I told you I wanted you to leave him. That wasn't the alcohol talking."_

 _"_ _I need to think about this… I just… I can't…"_

 _He presses his lips to mine again and I melt into him. I've wanted this moment for so long and now that it's here I'm terrified. I know Tobias has been doing something behind my back, and even though I've tried to attribute his erratic behavior to the surveillance he's doing for this war I know there is something more going on and that whatever it is he's gone to great lengths to hide it from me._

 _I know I don't love Tobias. I've known that for a long time._

 _"_ _Tris, say it whenever you're ready. You'll know." He whispers against my lips. "I have to go. We have less than forty eight hours. No matter what happens during that time I need you to know that I love you."_

 _With that we finish getting dressed and leave the training room quietly. Eric pulls me to him once more for a brief kiss before we go our separate ways down the dark hallways._

 _I make my way towards the Pit in search of Christina. Even though it's possible that she's too drunk to function, Eric's revelation has me in desperate need of a friend. I quickly spot her sitting at a high top table drinking what appears to be water while she fans herself with a menu. She smiles widely at me when she sees me approaching, but once she sees the look on my face her smile drops._

 _"_ _What's wrong?" She asks._

 _"_ _Chris…. He…."_

 _"_ _Hey, it's ok, it's just us. What did he do?" She asks._

 _"_ _He loves me." I spit out._

 _"_ _And you love him too." She replies. I'm immediately surprised by her casual acceptance._

 _"_ _I think I do."_

 ** _End Flashback_**

I wake up with a start, realizing that the dream I thought I was having was in fact a flashback. He had told me he loved me before the truth serum and neither of us remembered it.

His breath is warm against my neck and I slowly turn around in his arms so that I can face him.

"Baby." He says in his scratchy, sleep thickened voice. "You…ok?"

"I love you." I quietly reply.

"I love you….too."

I should tell him what I remember but I have no idea if it will help his already precarious mental state with his own memory wipe. I lose track of thought when his warm lips capture mine. We lazily kiss each other before eventually falling back to sleep.

xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx

I recognize the look on Eric's face, and it's the same glare he wore during most of my initiation when he was dealing with Jeanine's bullshit. I nervously watch him through the window of the speech therapy room they've taken him to, where they'd purposely separated him from me. This is not only his first session in Erudite, it's also the first session they've not allowed me in the room with him. The speech therapist that Dr. Merced recommended is an older, no nonsense African American woman named Dr. Bonita Denone and she refuses to be intimidated by my less than pleased husband.

One of Dr. Denone's reasons for separating us was she wanted Eric to speak freely without my help or influence. She expressed her displeasure with Eric's dependence on me during initial meeting with us, which of course set him off from the get go, and when she decided to separate us I had to force him to follow her into the room. I can see his angry and defiant body language through the window I'm watching them through and it worries me to no end.

"Hey." A voice behind me makes me jump and I turn to see the soft smile of Christina. "I didn't mean to scare you."

"What are you doing here?" I ask her.

"I had to come here to work on their main server in the control room. For some reason, David has been concentrating more on the satellite control rooms than the Dauntless one. It's actually quite amusing watching the logs for all of his failed attempts at getting the city cameras working. Each try leaks more and more of the virus into their system." She replies with a grin.

"Chris, I am so proud of you. What you are Mar have done is going to save our city. You're amazing." I reply with a grin of my own. "How long do you think it'll take?"

"They are so far off the trail in their attempts so it's really hard to say, but I don't think it'll be anytime soon."

I nod in acknowledgment and then turn towards the window again. Eric can't see me watching him since the window looks like a mirror from the inside, but he's smart enough to know that I'm out here. He knows I'd never leave him.

"How's he really doing Tris?" Christina asks quietly from beside me.

"Medically, he has continued to defy all odds. The serum he received should have killed him and it's still unknown as to how it didn't. Physically, he's gotten so much stronger. He couldn't walk or talk for weeks Chris. He didn't know who I was." My voice trails off as I fight to compose myself.

"You don't have to wear your mask in front of me Tris." Christina says as she places a hand on my shoulder and squeezes slightly. "How are you really doing?"

"I… I mean…" I try to talk but the tears just began flowing down my cheeks without any warning. "I…"

"You're not fine, so don't even try to tell me you are." Christina says as she ushers us to some chairs and puts her arms around me. My whole body shakes as the sobs rip through me. "Get it out sweetie. It's ok." She soothes as she presses a kiss to my head and wraps her arms tighter around me.

"He… he couldn't breathe on his own….and then he didn't know who I was….but he still loved me Chris." I say through tears.

"Of course he did Tris, you two have fought through so much shit to be together. There's absolutely nothing that will keep you apart." She replies softly.

"I thought he was going to die. I'm still terrified that if he stops drinking that serum that he will." I finally admit.

"Have you asked his doctor about that?" Chris asks.

I nod my head. "All that Dr. Farrar or Dr. Merced, well Scott and Chase as they've asked us to call them have said is that he's not out of the woods yet and it's too soon to say how long he'll be dependent on serums to get by. The serum they injected him with is still present in his bloodstream, although its capacity has greatly diminished. However, it's been almost three months since he was dosed with it and it's yet to completely be dispelled. They have no idea what that means."

"You're afraid they've left something in there that can be activated." She says and I nod against her shoulder. "Tris, of that were the case they'd have done it before now. Think about it, when you were still there David was pressuring the hell out of Scott to allow him to start testing on Eric. If there was a way he could do anything with the amount of serum that was left inside of him he would have acted on it when Scott was putting him off."

I take a deep breath and exhale slowly. What Christina says makes sense, and when I think about it I can't imagine David not exercising control of Eric if he had the chance.

"You're right about that, David wouldn't have hesitated." I sigh.

"What they did to Eric is awful Tris, and I can't imagine what he's gone through to get where he is today. But, you've forgotten to take care of yourself in all of this too. When's the last time you ate a real meal? How about you two come have dinner together in the cafeteria with us? Just something normal." Christina replies.

"I don't know if Eric wants to go out in public yet. He's still having a hard time with the attention he's getting."

"The attention he's getting is because he's a fucking phenomenon who beat a serum designed to torture and kill him. Tris, between you and me Zeke wants him back in leadership, you too but especially Eric. He's been trying to find a way to approach him. He thinks Eric needs to be head leader again." Chris confides.

"Eric wouldn't take head leadership again." I shake my head. "I don't know that he will even take leadership. He's tired, and he's ready to start a family once this is all over."

"Eric? A family? What the hell kind of magic have you worked on him?" Christina says with a giggle. I can't help but laugh back at her.

"None, this was his idea and all his doing." I shrug.

"So you two are trying?" She asks.

"We were, yes. But David gave me prevention serum again while I was in Milwaukee. If I were to become pregnant by a GD it taints my purity or whatever bullshit genetics they believe in over there." I reply.

"But, what if he's not damaged as they call it? Scott talked to us at length about Eric and David's obsession over him beating that serum. It almost seems like David thinks that Eric might be something that even you and Four aren't." Christina says.

I don't immediately answer because I know what she's saying is true. Matthew, Nita and Scott talked to Edgar, Four and I about the unexplained phenomena that Eric beating that serum was. It put him directly in David's crosshairs.

"Tris, you probably should get checked out too. You have no idea what serums David has pumped you full of, plus you've stopped following up on your own issues with that mutated memory serum you were given. I think you should at least get examined while you're in Erudite." She replies with concern.

"I know. I'll make an appointment with Chase if Scott doesn't make it back soon. He's the only person here I trust to be discreet."

I stand up and walk over to the window and watch Eric, I'm alarmed to see that he's sitting with his hands on his head and he looks to be upset about something. Christina soon joins me next to the window and glances over at me once she sees the state Eric is in.

"What's she doing to him?" I whisper.

"I don't know, but I've heard she's the best at what she does. Therapy isn't easy for anyone Tris, opening up and exposing yourself like that." She replies but stops talking as soon as she sees my expression.

"She's his speech therapist Chris. This shouldn't be difficult at all."

"Tris, she's a psychiatrist. What were you told?" Christina asks with her mouth agape.

"Chase told me he was setting Eric up with her for therapy, he made it seem like it was for Eric's continued speech therapy….oh my god Chris what have I done?" I ask as I watch Eric's uncomfortable body language through the window. "I'm going in there."

A hand on my arm stops me and I turn to stare at my best friend.

"Leave him in there. He needs this Tris, and so do you. I know you love him and are terrified to leave him alone, but this entire ordeal has been hell on both of you. Why don't you let him be and you and I can go see if Chase is around. You can get your questions answered and maybe go ahead with that checkup."

"No, if he comes out and I'm not here he'll worry. I can't." I reply as I watch him through the window.

"Ok, I'll compromise, he's got at least half an hour before he comes out. Let's at least find Chase and make an appointment. We can come right back." Christina offers. I sigh and nod my head. "Ok, come on."

I follow Christina through the halls and the apprehension is bubbling inside of me. I don't know why this sudden sense of insecurity is taking over, but I do know that being separated from Eric isn't just an issue for him at this point. It physically bothers me to be too far apart.

"Christina, I can't. I have to go back right now." I say as I turn away from her. I rush down the hallways towards the room Eric is being seen in and I can hear him well before I see him. I take off in a full sprint as I rush into the room he's in, where he is yelling at the older woman who calmly sits in her chair across the table from him.

"Eric!" I admonish as I rush over to him. He stops yelling and turns his steel grey eyes to me. I take in the flush of anger on his face and his labored breathing through flared nostrils.

"She's a fucking shrink!" He yells. "What did you do?"

"I didn't do anything! Chase set this up as therapy and I assumed that it was part of your speech therapy. Baby I had no idea." I reply as I try to rein my anger at the situation in.

"She's in here asking about how I feel about what happened! How do you think I feel?" He yells again as he begins pacing back and forth like a caged animal. I'm about to yell right back at him and then it dawns on me.

"Eric, you're not hesitating or stuttering." I say softly. He turns his red face towards me and his expression changes minutely.

"What?" He barks.

"Ever since you got angry your hesitancy to speak stopped. Eric, what your wife is trying to point out to you is you've not stuttered or been at a loss for words since you were angered." Dr. Denone replies. "Eric, you are holding in quite a lot of anger at your situation. You have every reason to be angry, and I base that just on the small bit of information about your medical history that was passed to be by doctors Merced and Farrar. I believe that if we could talk about some of the things that have led to where you are today we may be able to help get you to where you have the potential to be again."

"Tris…?" He looks at me for some sort of confirmation. His expression has softened but his apprehension is apparent. I walk over to him and take his hands in my own. "I'm sorry for yelling." He says slowly.

"It's ok, you were upset and caught off guard." I reply. He tries to grip my hands but when he can't his frustration shows. He turns to face Dr. Denone.

"Can you fix..this?" He brings up our entwined hands and demonstrates the way his fingers refuse to move properly.

"Eric that can be fixed in your continued physical therapy and medication as long as you continue to be dedicated to both, but what I can do is help you to deal with the emotional trauma that you've been though." She offers.

"I only do this with her." He gestures towards me. "I won't hear anymore shit...about...being too dependent on...her. She's my...wife and I can only do this...with...her being here."

"That is up to her." The doctor replies.

"Will it be more harmful or helpful if I'm here?" I finally ask.

"Based on what I've just seen I'd say helpful. However, I can't have you here as a mere observer. I need to get to know both of you and through that I will be able to help you repair the damage done to each of you individually and to your relationship as well." She replies.

"Our marriage is not damaged." Eric roars and I squeeze his hands and pull him closer to me.

"Eric, please don't take my words out of context. I don't believe in any of the genetic rhetoric from Milwaukee about damage. I am simply referring to the emotional strain that was placed on you both as individuals and as a couple."

"Yes, I'm willing to do this, together." I say and Eric glances over at me.

"Ok." Eric says.

Dr. Denone gestures for us both to have a seat at the table with her, where she gently prods us to give her the overview of what the two of us have been through together to get us where we are today. She only asks the very basic of questions, more so to clarify things we have said to her. Throughout our session her expression remains neutral, which to me is a feat since some of the things Eric and I are talking about are pretty unbelievable.

"Eric, I think some of your speech issues are a mental block…." Dr. Denone begins but Eric cuts her off in a rage.

"I'm not a fucking mental case!" He shouts. I take his trembling hands in my own and pull him closer to me.

"Baby, you have to calm down. Give her a chance to speak before you react. Think about what she says rather than why you think she's saying it." I say quietly and he brings one of our entwined hands up and presses his lips against my knuckles. He turns towards Dr. Denone and takes a deep breath in.

"I'm sorry for that." He says slowly and she nods.

"It's quite alright. I'd much rather you get that anger and rage out of you than hold it inside. That is what is most damaging to you as a person. When I use the word damaged, it's not to describe your genetic makeup or your relationship with your wife and others Eric, it's to explain what holding the anger inside is doing to you." She explains.

We spend some time talking a little more openly with the doctor and Eric begins to slightly relax. I finally decide to ask the question that's been in the back of my mind since Eric's earlier outburst.

"Why was he able to speak normally when he was upset?"

Dr. Denone looks at Eric briefly before turning her attention to me. "We believe that Eric is suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder, which is why Doctors Farrar and Merced have enlisted my services." She looks over to Eric. "The physical aftermath from the trauma you have suffered was great, and your recovery from it has been nothing short of phenomenal however your emotional trauma runs deep. Dr. Farrar was quite concerned over some of the conversations the two of you had, especially when it came to the emotional trauma and turmoil that spawned from your initial memory losses. Especially since you've recovered a significant memory that your wife hasn't…."

"No… we're not talking….about….that…" Eric replies.

"Talking about what? What did you remember?"

"Eric, I believe discussing the memories that each of you recover is paramount in your healing process. The two of you have found each other time and time again, and managed to fall deeper in love each time. I think you should share what you remember with Tris."

"It was the first…time I told you how I feel… about you…" He begins.

"In the leadership training room two days before the war, after our first kiss in the tattoo shop," Eric's eyes widen and the smile he's been lacking for most of the day creeps onto his face. "I remembered it this morning; in fact that memory woke me up that first time."

"Baby….." He whispers before leaning over to kiss my temple. "I love…you."

"Dr. Denone, my sincerest apologies for the interruption but Dauntless' head leader has sent transportation to pick up Mr. and Mrs. Coulter." A young woman says as she rushes into the room.

"What's the meaning of this Alicia?" The doctor replies.

"I'm sorry, all the said was that it was an emergency and it was imperative that they leave immediately." The woman replies as she ushers us towards the door much to the chagrin of Dr. Denone. We are escorted into the back of a waiting SUV where we are quickly whisked away by the driver.

"Excuse me sir, could you tell us what's going on?" I ask the driver, a greying man whom I don't recognize wearing a beanie and aviator sunglasses.

"Ma'am, I just am under orders to return you." He replies stoically.

Eric reaches for his phone and tries to call Zeke, but is frustrated when it goes to voicemail. I reach for my phone and text Edgar.

 _T: What's going on?_

 _E: Not a lot, just waiting for Tobias to get home. How's Erudite?_

 _T: Zeke sent a car to come pick us up in the middle of Eric's appointment. What's the emergency?_

My phone rings and I quickly answer it.

"Don't react. Do you recognize who picked you up?" He asks quietly but urgently.

"No." I reply.

"Keep your phone on and this call open as long as you can. We're going to trace you. Don't panic, we will find you. Put your phone in your pocket but keep it on. I love you." Edgar replies.

I turn to speak to Eric but he slowly slumps against me and his body goes completely limp. I feel a needle against my neck and an arm across my shoulders from behind.

"Don't even think of moving." A deep voice warns.

"What did you do to him?" I ask in a trembling voice. I'm holding my husband's limp body against my own as tightly as I can.

"You should have cooperated." The man answers.

"I'll do whatever you want, please just don't hurt him."

He chuckles darkly. "You foolish girl, you are nothing to us anymore. So self centered." He tsks. "We wouldn't do anything to hurt him, _we want him._ "


	39. Chapter 39

**AN: I know, it's been over a month. Life got crazy, went through some stuff, but its good again. Really good. I'm back to doing what I love, and I hope you can forgive me for my long absence.**

 **Enjoy. Please note there is a time jump.**

 ** _Eighteen months later_**

Eric POV

I stand in front of the expansive windows of my office taking in the city below me. _My_ city. Under my guidance we have rebuilt the entire city from the ground up, tearing down the dilapidated buildings from before the war and replacing them with enormous skyscrapers. Construction like this before the war would take years, but we've managed to literally and figuratively rebuild the city of Detroit in a matter of months, bringing it to something that no one could have possibly imagined.

It's bigger and better than Milwaukee, which pleases me for many reasons, one of which is my colleague David who is the leader of what was once our largest city in Milwaukee now has to answer to me in the hierarchal food chain. We've talked about exploring further and developing other cities, but right now our main focus is between Detroit and Milwaukee.

The phone on my desk buzzes and I punch the speaker button. "What Clara?" I bark.

My assistant Clara is what some would consider the sweet grandmotherly type, however her ability to treat me less like her boss and more like her child has infuriated me on more than one occasion. I take a deep breath to try to calm myself before I once again end up on the other end of one of her lectures about my poor attitude.

"Eric, I have a phone call on line six for you from Roxanne. I tried to explain you weren't to be disturbed but she insisted it was important." Clara replies.

"Put her through." I say with a sigh. I hear the alert of the call being patched through and I can hear what sounds like the rustling of fabric on the other line. "Roxanne?" I say tentatively.

"We'll be there in less than an hour. Clear your schedule." She replies before the line goes dead. I try calling her back and it goes immediately to her voicemail.

"What the fuck?" I grumble out loud. "Clara!" I yell. My assistant strolls in and fixes her dark brown eyes on me.

"You bellowed?" She says with exaggerated sweetness.

"Who the fuck does that woman think she is telling me to clear my fucking schedule? Just because her husband seems to think I still answer to him doesn't mean his fucking wife can just order me around. That's the issue with you women, you think just because we put a ring on your finger it gives you some sort of power over us…"

"You can stop your bullshit right now about women. The reason you don't have a nice young lady in your life right now is because of your temper and poor attitude." Clara says as she ambles through my office door and sits on one of the chairs in front of my desk. "Now, you can drop your attitude about Roxanne and about women in general for that matter, and try this entire conversation again."

"Clara, I'm sorry yet again for my outburst." I reply quietly.

"Your anger at women concerns me, did something happen before you left Milwaukee?" She replies.

"I just don't want anyone in my life. Did Roxanne say why she was coming here?" I retort.

"No, she didn't, she just said it was urgent. Did something happen?" She presses.

"It was an odd conversation. She said I needed to clear my schedule." I shrug.

"I can do that. You were scheduled to have lunch with Sabrina though, and from what I understand she's single…"

"Do not finish that. Clara, I love that you look out for me, but I don't want anyone in my life." I reply.

"Eric, I worry about you. All you do is work constantly, even David is married to Roxanne and it hasn't impacted his ability to lead Milwaukee. I just think that you need something other than work. You haven't been yourself lately." Clara explains.

She's right, I certainly haven't felt like myself and it's partially from the strange dreams that have been plaguing me every night for the past several weeks. My life has been pretty uneventful, memories of growing up happy in Milwaukee fill my mind, and the pictures of my parents who were killed in a freak helicopter accident decorate my office. I realize that as an adult I've closed myself off, but I've often believed it's from losing my parents as a teenager that has given me the personality flaws that Clara loves to point out.

These dreams have been something completely different and unusual. For over a year I've dreamt of a war, just fragmented bits and pieces of people and events that mean nothing to me. A few weeks ago a woman started showing up in my dreams almost every night. I knew nothing of her except the way she looks – long dark blonde hair, large hazel eyes and a smattering of freckles across her cheeks. She's not a bombshell, but to me she is the absolute most stunning woman I've ever seen. Every time I wake up I long to go back to sleep to see her again.

"Are you still having trouble sleeping?" She presses.

This woman is like a living, breathing lie detector. There's no way out of her questions and she knows it.

"Yes." I reply simply. "Can you go ahead and clear my schedule, Roxanne said she'd be here within the hour."

I don't miss the way that Clara looks at me as she sets her lips in a firm line and narrows her eyes at me. To her credit, she says nothing as she gingerly lifts herself from the chair and heads out of the office.

I busy myself with the never ending stream of email and paperwork that comes with leading a city. Going through my email is my least favorite task, and usually someone from David's team has the job of screening the email for all of leadership. I scan over my inbox idly, recognizing the same names over and over. One email catches my eye, it shows up in a different color than the other official city government colors and it makes me realize this could potentially be email from one of the outlying cities we've thought of rehabilitating. The sender is someone named John Jones, and I double click the message to open it.

Threeonetwofivefivefiveeightsixzerozero

I look at it again and realize this is a phone number which I quickly write down before the message suddenly disappears from my screen. I click the refresh button several times and realize the message has been completely removed.

"The fuck?" I say out loud. I glance at the paper I wrote the number down on messily and I quickly pick up my phone. I dial the number and feel my stomach churning as it rings.

"Hello?" An unfamiliar male voice beckons on the other side. I swallow the lump in my dry throat.

"Who is this?" I bark out.

"Who are you looking for?" He presses.

"John Jones." I reply brusquely.

"Holy shit." He breathes. "Eric?"

"Who the fuck are you?" I growl.

"Is this Eric Coulter?" He asks.

"I'm going to ask you one more fucking time, who the fuck areyou?" I shout, bringing Clara into my office. I quickly wave her away.

"My name is Edgar Matthews." The man finally identifies himself to me.

"How do you know me? Why did I get an email from John Jones with this number?" I ask.

"Where are you right now?" He asks.

"In my fucking office. How do I know you?" I ask again.

"We need to meet, even with the measures we've put into place on our side I'm not certain that it's not secure speaking like this. Where can I meet you? Are you in the city?"

"What city?" I ask.

"Chicago." Edgar replies. My stomach immediately drops.

"You're full of shit. Who are you really, where are you from?" I shout.

"I just told you. I'm Edgar Matthews and I'm from Chicago." He says calmly.

"THERE IS NO CHICAGO!" I shout. This time Clara bursts into the room and won't leave when I try to wave her off. I feel her slowly rubbing circles on my back as she gently nudges me towards my desk chair.

"Eric, I don't know what you've been told but there very much is a Chicago. It's your home, and you were kidnapped from here a year and a half ago. Is Tris with you?"

"Who the hell is Tris?" I ask. Clara stands in front of me and I shake my head when she tries to get me to sit. She presses the speaker phone button on my phone.

"Who is speaking?" She says in a tone dripping with authority.

"Hello ma'am, my name is Edgar Matthews, with whom am I speaking?"

"My name is Clara LePage, I am the administrative assistant to Mr. Coulter and more so he is like a son to me. Who are you and why are you upsetting him so?" She demands.

"Ma'am, I've been looking for Eric for over a year now. He and my sister were kidnapped from our city and we've not seen them since." He replies.

"From what city?" Clara breathes out.

"Chicago. Eric is my brother in law." He explains.

"No. I am an only child, there's no way I can have a brother in law." I roar as Clara places one of her hands on my shoulder.

"You're married to my sister. Eric is she with you? Where is Tris?" He asks.

I finally sit back in the chair feeling completely defeated. The look on Clara's face is indescribable; a rage that I've never seen is currently across her grandmotherly features and her knuckles are white where she is gripping the side of my desk.

"Where can we meet you?" Clara finally asks, taking complete control of the situation.

"I'm in Chicago…"

"No, we are going somewhere neutral. This could easily be a set up, and this man has been through enough." I listen as Clara rattles off what sounds like coordinates and makes plans to meet with this Edgar person.

I'm checked out completely by the time she begins writing things down on one of the many notepads that are scattered across my desk. This man says I am married. I look down at my hands and I look closely at my ring finger, noticing the slight discoloration of the skin on it. I trace my finger around the smallest indication of a tan line where a ring could have once been located.

"Edgar!" I shout, causing Clara to jump. "What does your sister look like?"

"Long dark blonde hair, she's on the average side height wise for a woman, maybe five five or five six, she's got hazel eyes that are mostly green, her skin is kind of pale, um what else…"

"Freckles." I whisper, loud enough that Edgar hears.

"Yeah, across her cheeks and nose, especially if she's been in the sun." He replies. Clara looks up at me.

"You know this woman?" She asks.

"I've been dreaming of her for the past several weeks. That's why I have been having trouble sleeping." I reply.

"You're remembering her." Clara says while nodding her head. "Edgar, we will see you very soon." They exchange their goodbyes as I look idly out the expansive windows of my office. "Eric, they've done something to you… when you were in Milwaukee…" Clara shakes her head. "I think we…." She's interrupted by the loud wail of a baby that seems to be coming from right outside of my office. I watch her walk out of my door and I slump back against my chair. My door opens again and a frazzled looking Roxanne rushes in.

"We need to go." She says as she frantically looks around my office. "The cameras, are they…?"

"Still off. What is going on? Why are you so nervous?" I ask.

"Eric, we need to go before he finds out I'm gone." Roxanne replies.

"Who?"

"David. There's so much I need to explain to you. Eric, I need you to trust me. We have to leave its imperative." She presses.

"And go where? What the fuck is going on here?" I yell. The door to my office bursts open and Clara's concerned eyes immediately connect with mine.

"Eric, I need you to stay very calm right now, please." She says slowly and carefully.

"You are in on this Clara?" I roar.

"No, Eric please just try and stay calm… Roxanne can explain things further but she needs you to be level headed for her."

I turn my focus to Roxanne. "Do you know Edgar Matthews?" I can see the color drain from her face.

"What? Oh my god how do you know that name?" She asks.

"He tracked me down this morning, right after you called me. What is going on here? He told me I'm fucking married Roxanne, I'm allegedly married to his sister. He claims to be from Chicago…." I ramble loudly. I can still hear the whimpers and cries from a baby and I slam my hands on my desk. "Can someone shut that fucking kid up?"

"Eric…." Clara says and I glare at her. Roxanne leaves the room and immediately returns with a woman carrying the crying infant.

She has long dark blonde hair, and her hazel eyes are darting all around the room while she tries to calm the screaming child in her arms. His curly dark blonde hair is sticking to his sweaty red face, and the tears are steadily leaking from his grey eyes. Looking at him is like looking at a smaller version of me. The way his forehead slopes, the shape and color of his eyes, his lips, and his wild curly hair is all mine.

This has to be my son.

 ** _Flashback_** :

" _You're serious about having a baby?" She asks me. Her head is on my chest and I'm tracing one hand up and down her naked back._

 _"Why wouldn't I be?" I ask._

 _"We literally just got married yesterday." She replies with a giggle._

 _"And we literally have tried to make a baby several times since then, at least seven, not that I'm counting." I reply with a grin._

 _"I'm being serious Eric." She replies._

 _"So am I Tris. I want a family with you."_

 _"Even without knowing what's outside that wall?" She asks._

 _"Even then baby, no matter what's out there all that matters to me is that you and I are together. We can start our family and we'll make this work." I reply. "Do you realize I've wanted you since the moment I saw you? Tris, we have fought through so much bullshit to be together and here right now. I'm not waiting for anything anymore when it comes to you."_

 _She's quiet for a long time and I concentrate on the way her fingers feel as she draws shapes on my chest._

 _"So, what about names?" She asks._

 _"Baby names?" I retort as I look down at her._

" _Mmhmm." She hums in response._

 _"For a girl I'd like to name her Scarlett. It reminds me of the color red, and that color reminds me of our wedding day." I reply. "Red has always been our favorite color."_

 _"It's a beautiful idea." Tris replies quietly._

 _"For a boy I was also thinking of color." I chuckle. "Or I guess it could be the lack thereof, depending on how you see it. The color grey will always remind me of the moment I saw you, and it's a part of your roots. I like the name Greyson." I reply._

 _"You've really given this a lot of thought." She says softly._

 _"I have." I agree. "We've been through enough hell for a hundred lifetimes. I'm ready for our happily ever after. Isn't that part of the fairy tale we signed up for when we got married?"_

 _She sighs against me and snuggles closer. "I love you so much."_

 _"I love you more than you will ever know." I reply._

 _"So, are you ready to make that baby now?" I ask. She doesn't answer; instead she crawls up towards me and begins kissing me again._

 _ **End** **Flashback**_

"Can I?" I ask as I reach for him. Her eyes flit to mine and for a split second there seems to be a moment of recognition before fear takes over. She turns away from me briefly but the child's arms dart out towards me as he leans away from her.

"He never…" She murmurs as I take the wailing boy from her hands.

He's crying so hard that he's starting to have a hard time catching his breath and I place a soothing hand on his back and walk circles around my office as he settles his sweaty face into my neck. My office is completely quiet, and I notice the three women are all watching me as I pace around the room.

"What's his name?" I ask the younger woman who I assume is his mother.

"Greyson." She replies softly.

"The color grey has always reminded me of you. From the minute you jumped onto the roof." I murmur absentmindedly as Tris' eyes widen.

"I dreamed about that." She whispers. Greyson whimpers loudly from my arms.

"It's ok Greyson, shhh." I whisper to the infant who is slowly relaxing his small body against me. Within minutes he's completely quiet and his sobs have subsided. I feel the warmth of his breath against my neck and I glance over at Clara who is smiling.

"He's asleep." She says quietly.

"I can take him." The young blonde offers while standing up. I shake my head at her.

"Who's his father?" I ask bluntly.

"Eric…" Clara begins and I glare at her.

"Your name is Eric?" The blonde asks and I turn my attention to her.

"What do you know about me?" I ask her.

She turns to face me and hesitantly begins to speak. "I dream about you sometimes. I don't always remember the way the man looks in my dreams, other than he's always strong and makes me feel safe. But that name, Eric… it's always the same." She says.

Roxanne stands up and approaches me. "We don't have a lot of time, but there is something you both need to know. Eric, Tris the two of you are married. A year and a half ago David had the two of you kidnapped and he wiped both of your memories. His work with you Eric, it was more severe because he found out that Tris was pregnant…"

"What? This…he's…" Tris stutters looking from Roxanne back to me and then at the sleeping boy in my arms.

"Tris, I know it's a lot to take in, but we really need to focus here…." Roxanne begins.

"No! You want me to believe you over my own parents Roxanne? How can you possibly be serious about this right now? I need to get back home…" Tris argues but Roxanne cuts her off.

"We have to go. If David finds out what I'm doing we're all dead. I'll try to explain more on the way, but we have to leave now." Roxanne says.

"What, no. You've known me my whole life and you're just now telling me this garbage? You want me to uproot my son-".

"Our son." I say firmly.

"That is my son. I have no idea who his father is, because he's the result of artificial insemination. Roxanne, please tell him." Tris replies angrily. I rub gentle circles on Greyson's back and he sighs contentedly against me.

"You can't tell me you don't see the resemblance between Greyson and me." I reply quietly.

"So what? You jerked off in a cup somewhere and I ended up with your sperm when they were running experiments. It doesn't make you his dad. Where the hell have you been for the past year and a half? I went through the pregnancy without you, I went through delivery without you, and he's ten months old already – ten months without you. So what if he looks like you? Big deal." She finishes with a huff.

"Let me." Clara says as she gently reaches for Greyson.

"No." I reply, angling my body away from her.

"Eric, you and Tris need to talk without the baby here." Clara replies.

"He doesn't leave my sight. Absolutely not." I growl and she glares at me.

"Fine, we keep the baby in here, where you know damn good and well there's only one way in and out and that's through my office. You and Tris go to my office to talk." Clara replies as she gestures towards the door. She turns her lips up in a satisfying grin knowing she has me backed into a corner.

"Fine." I grumble and she gently takes my sleeping son from my arms. I watch as she settles in with him and Tris and I reluctantly leave my office and walk into Clara's smaller office.

"You remember me." I immediately say.

"I have dreams that you've been in. I don't actually know what that means." She replies. "Are you saying you remember me?"

"There are some things I remember about you and about us." I reply.

"I don't know what you think you remember about me or about us but I'm not in on whatever this plan of yours is. This is ludicrous! Do you really think I am going to just meekly step aside while some stranger tries to come into my life and pretend to be the father to my son?" She argues, her tone getting angrier and louder with every word she speaks.

"I knew nothing about you until today!" I shout. "I've dreamt of you for weeks now, but I had no idea you were a real fucking person. I get a phone call from Roxanne telling me to clear my schedule, then an email with a fucking phone number that I call and reach someone who claims to be my brother in law living in a city that doesn't fucking exist and then Roxanne shows up with the person I was just told is my wife who happens to have what very well appears to be my son with her! But, you're the only one whose entire world and life is a lie?"

Tris stares at me with wide eyes brimming with tears. I watch the quiver in her strong set jaw and without thinking or hesitation I walk to her and wrap my arms around her. She immediately stiffens in my arms but I pull her closer and hold her tighter and I soon feel her shoulders shaking from her soft crying. Her arms slowly snake around my waist as she finally begins to relax in my arms.

"It's ok Tris, I'm here. We will figure this out." I say.

We stand together for several minutes without speaking before I finally ask a question that's been sitting on the tip of my tongue.

"Why'd you name him Greyson?"

"I don't know." She replies quietly. "Roxanne had told me before that when I found out I was having a boy I was adamant that his name be Greyson. She also said that I had a girl's name picked out…"

"Scarlett." I interrupt and she gasps and pulls away from me.

"How do you know that? Who told you?" She asks.

"We talked about baby names the day after our wedding. We were trying to start a family." I reply.

"What wedding?" She asks.

"I had a memory of the conversation Tris, and in it you mentioned we'd just gotten married the day before and you wanted to be sure we were ready to start a family." I reply and she shakes her head.

"None of that happened." She replies in a hard tone. "I have a life in Milwaukee. I have parents there. Eric, I'm sure you are a great person but…" she is unable to finish her thought before the door to my office opens and Clara emerges with a sleeping Greyson in her arms and Roxanne on her heels.

"We have to go now." Roxanne says and before anyone can protest she's holding her hand up to silence us. "Clara and I have spoken with several leaders from the city of Chicago and we have agreed on a secret rendezvous point. We have to go now though."

"No, I won't leave my family behind. " Tris replies emphatically. "My parents are in Milwaukee, they've helped me raise Grey, and I can't just leave Roxanne. You've been an amazing friend to me, but you have to understand why I can't go."

"Tris, your parents are in on David's plan. Listen to me please. Greyson is in danger if you stay there. David has plans to take him from you as soon as he's a year old Tris. That baby has the genetic makeup that David has been searching for his whole life and he's simply been waiting until his brain matures enough to begin the gene extraction. You absolutely cannot stay there. David is a monster." Roxanne warns with tears in her eyes.

"Why wouldn't you tell me this before now?" Tris asks in a shaky voice.

"Because he wiped my memory too, but I was able to fight it. I've had my full memory back for several weeks now however I needed time to plan our escape. Tris, please trust me, I need you to leave to protect your son." Roxanne pleads.

Tris glances at me and I reach out for her. She flinches at my touch and it takes everything in my power to not get angry at her physical responses to me. I am not a person who trusts easily, but in this moment I know that the woman in front of me is something extraordinary, and the child she has been raising is without a doubt my son. I remove my hand from her arm and she trains her hard hazel eyes on mine.

"I won't let anything happen to Greyson or to you." I finally say once I compose myself. "I don't know why, but I believe Roxanne and I believe Edgar Matthews too. You're my wife Tris, and that is our son. I've missed a year and a half of our life together. I've missed so much with him."

Clara cautiously approaches and I gently take Greyson from her arms and he snuggles in against my shoulder.

"You don't get to just swoop in here and be his father, or my husband for that matter." Tris says in a quiet but angry voice.

"We have to go." Roxanne presses urgently. I glance over at Tris again and her hard glare has been replaced with fear. A look I've seen only once before…

 _ **Flashback**_

 _I tighten my grip on my wife's hand as the trucks slowly approach us. We've been walking through this barren expanse of land for hours with no signs of life or relief._

 _"What the…" Peter murmurs from next to me._

 _"Stay back." I warn as I draw my weapon. I glance over at Tris and the fearful look in her eyes is nothing I've ever seen from her before. I watch as the rest of our group all draws their weapons in preparation to face whoever is in the two trucks that are approaching us. Tris has her weapon drawn but I can see her hands shaking._

 _"Baby, look at me." I command and she turns slightly to face me. "We will never let anything happen to each other. We are going to be ok."_

 _"I love you." She whispers._

 _The two trucks stop in front of us and we all point our weapons._

 _"I love you too. Always." I whisper back._

 _ **End** **Flashback**_

"Let's go." Clara says as she walks towards the door.

"Clara, no, you can't leave here. It could be dangerous out there." I argue. "You stay."

"Like hell I will. I've lived sixty one years of my life in a state of perpetual fear due to all of these wars. You are the closest thing I have to family since I've watched everyone I love die. I'm going, besides someone will need to help with that precious angel." She says as she lays one of her hands against Greyson's back.

"Tris?" I ask. She moves closer to me, kissing our son's exposed cheek and then the hand he has close to his mouth.

"I can't let anything happen to him." She says quietly.

"We won't." I repeat.

Roxanne ushers us all out of my office and into her SUV. I help Tris get Greyson buckled into his car seat and she slides in to the middle of the bench seat next to him while I sit on her other side.

"It's going to be a bit of a drive to get to where we've agreed to meet Edgar so please just speak up if you need to stop. Is Greyson ok?" Roxanne asks as she makes eye contact with Tris through the rearview mirror.

"He's fine, he's asleep. I changed and fed him before we left." She answers quietly.

We ride in relative silence for a while. Roxanne turned some soft music on and she and Clara are talking quietly from the front seat. I haven't been able to keep my eyes off of Grayer for the entire trip. I watch as he sleeps, the innocent dreams he's having causing him to smile every once in a while.

"He does that a lot." Tris whispers from next to me. She smiles before continuing. "He's such a happy baby, he chatters a lot and keeps himself entertained. He loves Roxanne, but most men scare him. I couldn't believe it when he reached out for you."

"He's a beautiful boy. It's obvious you've done a great job with him." I reply quietly.

"Do you really remember me?" She asks.

"I've had what I thought were dreams for a few weeks about you. When I spoke to your brother today I began wondering if my dreams were in fact memories. Seeing you makes me think they are." I reply. "I've been having flashbacks of us ever since you stepped into my office today."

"Do you think you're his father?" She asks.

"Yeah I do. He looks just like me Tris."

"And you think we… I mean I was told he was from artificial… um…" She replies nervously. There is a blush crawling up her neck to her cheeks and I gently place my hand on her cheek and turn her face towards me.

Her hazel eyes are intense and suddenly I am flooded with memories of us. It's like flipping through a scrapbook, just small snippets of a life we lived together.

"Tris…" I whisper. I can no longer think clearly as I lean in and brush my lips against hers.

"Stop." She says angrily while pushing me away from her. "I don't even know you."

"Tris, I think…" I stammer.

"No, I don't want to hear anything else about these dreams or how Greyson looks like you. Like I said before, anyone can jerk off into a cup. He's had no father; all he's had is my father and Matthew…"

"Who's Matthew?" I ask.

"None of your damn business." She hisses.

"None of my business? Someone else has been involved in my son's life and it's none of my business?" I ask angrily. Clara turns and scowls at me and I take a deep breath in.

"He's not your son!" Tris shouts. Greyson stirs from his car seat next to her but after a few soothing touches from me he continues to sleep.

"Tris, he is Greyson's father. There was no artificial insemination. You and Eric are married. There's so much more that you don't know but this is neither the time nor place. David has been pumping you both full of serums to suppress your memories, and without his interference you both will start to remember. Eric has already started because I took the necessary means to ensure the protein powder he had on order from Milwaukee was no longer tainted by David's team." Roxanne says. "Eric hasn't been dosed in almost three weeks."

"Which is exactly when I started dreaming about you." I whisper to Tris and she looks at me incredulously.

"Tris, I did everything I could to keep you free of the serums but I believe you were still getting some of them directly from David. Now that you're out of the city we can get you both completely clean from them." Roxanne replies.

"Why are you willing to turn against your own husband?" Clara asks.

"Because he's an absolute monster…." Roxanne replies barely above a whisper. "Once I started questioning his practices and motives he wiped my memory. He tried to make me forget everything and he used me. I'm his wife, the woman he promised to love and protect when we got married last year, and yet he was using me to further his sick plans. I've been with that man for twenty eight years, both as my business partner and as my life partner, and he chose to wipe my memory and use me like everyone else who doesn't bend at his will."

"How'd you get your memories back?" I ask.

"With Nita and Matthew's help, they started giving me anti-serums once they had finally identified how David was administering the serums to me. His method for me was also in the same protein powder that he was sending to Eric."

"Do you have any of the anti-serums for the two of them?" Clara asks and I watch Roxanne shake her head.

"Sadly, no I don't. My plans were thwarted by a mistake I made this morning. I made a comment about a memory I shouldn't have and even though David pretended not to hear it I know he did. I needed to leave and to get Tris and Greyson away." Roxanne replies.

"How are they supposed to recover?" Clara asks angrily.

"They're both serum resistant, once their bodies are given the opportunity to expel the serum." Roxanne explains with a hint of nervousness in her voice. We pull onto a gravel road and she slows to a stop in front of a large building with two men dressed in black wait outside with their weapons drawn.

"What is this?" I ask as I reach for my own weapon.

"We're here." Roxanne answers.


	40. Chapter 40

**AN: Thanks to all of you for your patience and love while I try to work through my writer's block. Hope you enjoy.**

The silence in the truck is almost deafening as Eric shifts uneasily beside me. Greyson sleeps soundly in his car seat and we watch nervously as Roxanne and Clara have a conversation with the two men clad in all black.

When Roxanne unexpectedly burst into my apartment today I was completely unprepared for her to want to take both Greyson and me with her today. My parents were prepared to watch Grey while I worked off site with Roxanne, this was set to be just like any other day I've had since returning to work after Grey's birth.

"This is a lot…." I murmur, mentally chastising myself for vocalizing my inner thoughts.

"I agree." Eric rumbles from next to me. He's yet to take his eyes off of Clara or Roxanne.

I take some time to look at him while he's distracted. He's undoubtedly a handsome man with the same wild curly hair and grey eyes that Greyson has. His frame is large but lean, with a body showing that he takes care of himself and stays in shape. My eyes trace the veins in his forearms before traveling back up to his face. He has a perfect profile and his jawline is strong. His lips are neither thin nor overly full, although his bottom lip is fuller than his top.

 ** _Flashback_**

 _"How'd you do it?" Eric asks me._

 _"Do what?" I retort_ _and he arches his pierced eyebrow at me._

 _"How'd you always know_ _it wasn't real?" He replies. He pulls my feet onto his lap and massages them as_ _I lean back against the pillows on the back of our couch._

 _"Four actually helped_ _me. He told me that when they were running the sims on him there was always s_ _omething off about the person or situation. When he'd see me in his sims, my_ _eye color would be wrong. When I'd see you in my sims you'd be missing a p_ _iercing. It was primarily your lip ring that'd be missing, but there was_ _another time where it was your nipple rings. That was my tell, there was always_ _something different about you."_

 _ **End Flashback**_

"This isn't real…." I whisper as I reach my fingers out and trace his bottom lip. He jerks his head towards me and takes my hand in his.

"Tris, what did you just say?" He asks quietly.

"This isn't real." I repeat. I bring my eyes up to meet his and I finally see softness in the way he's watching me.

"What do you mean by that?" He asks.

"I don't know." I reply. "Your lip… you had a piercing… and when it was missing it wasn't real…" I murmur. This time I don't pull away when he lifts our entwined hands up and places a gentle kiss on the back of my hand. He slowly brushes his lips against my fingertips before speaking.

"I took it out when I moved to Detroit. I thought I'd look more professional without the piercings in my…"

"Eyebrow and lips, you had two here." I reply as I trace above his eyebrow with my free hand. There are faint bumps where his dermal piercings once were and I take notice of the way his eyes close when I touch him.

"Mhmm." He hums. When my fingers trace over his lips again he kisses them. "Do you still have the others?" I ask.

"You remember?" He whispers against my fingertips and I nod.

"I have them." I move my hand from his lips and brush across his chest, feeling the piercings in his nipples when I trace over them. "Tris, this is real."

"Who am I to you?" I whisper

 ** _Flashback_**

 _"Who are we to each_

 _other?" I ask hesitantly._

 _"Soulmates." He_

 _replies without hesitation. "Tris, you're the…"_

 ** _End Flashback_**

"…love of my life." He replies quietly.

I shake my head slightly and focus on his grey eyes. "What did you just say?"

He takes a deep breath before speaking. "You asked who you are to me and I answered. You are the love of my life."

"How do you know?" I ask incredulously. "You didn't even know who I was when I walked in to your office today. You've had some dreams of me and suddenly I'm the love of your life?"

"When you love someone you just know. Why do you fight against it so much Tris? I think somewhere inside you remember me too, and you remember that we love each other." He argues.

"Who, or what is Four to you?" I ask.

Eric shakes his head as he answers. "A number? What are you talking about?"

"There was something….just a few moments ago… I remembered talking to you about sims and explaining how someone I referred to as Four helped me." I explain.

"Tell me everything." He commands. When I meet his eyes he closes them and takes a deep breath before continuing. "Sorry. I don't mean to come across like such a demanding jerk. You remembered something and I just need to hear it."

"It was just a conversation where you asked me how I did it. I'm not exactly sure what it meant but in my explanation to you I told you that missing piercings were my tell, and that Four helped me determine that."

"Your tell? Like a touchstone that helps you determine reality from fantasy?" He asks.

"Yes, something like that." I agree. "I also remembered asking you before who we were to each other and you told me we were soulmates."

"I don't remember everything about that conversation but I believe it to be true. Ever since you walked into my office I've felt a strong connection to you and to Greyson." Eric replies softly.

"This is all so much. When I woke up this morning I had a whole different life. I had my parents, Grey, Roxanne, Matthew…"

"Tris, who is Matthew to you?" Eric asks.

"He's my friend. " I answer softly.

Eric narrows his grey eyes at me. "This may not really be my business but I have to know. Has he ever been anything more than a friend to you?"

 ** _Flashback_**

 _"I don't think that I've seen you around before, I'm Matthew Stewart. I just got hired to work in the lab here." The tall man with the light brown hair and brown eyes says as he_ grins and extends his hand to me.

 _"Oh, no I don't think we've met. I'm Tris." I reply as I grasp his hand and give it a firm shake._

 _"How do you like your new job?"_

 _"It's good. It feels almost like coming home." He replies while tidying up our shared workspace._

 _"Are you originally from Milwaukee?" I ask._

 _"Nope, I'm a transfer from Detroit." He remarks. "I've just been welcomed warmly and I've met some awfully nice people. Are you from Milwaukee?"_

 _I nod my head. "Born and raised."_

 _"That's great, maybe you can give me some pointers on what there is to do around here?" He asks with a grin._

 _"Ah, wonderful, I see the two of you have finally met." David says enthusiastically as he walks into the lab. "Matthew is one of the country's most talked about up and coming_

 _scientists."_

 _"You're too kind." Matthew replies with a blush on his freckled cheeks._

 _"I speak the truth, you came highly recommended. I'm pleased you've met Tris, she's one of our best." David retorts in a tone that I recognize as false nonchalance. "I'll_

 _leave you two to get acquainted. Perhaps Tris can show you around town this evening."_

 _I look over at David and realize he's not making a simple suggestion, but rather a veiled command. I'm not sure who this Matthew may be to him, however it seems important that I make a good impression._

 _"I would, but Grey…"_

 _"Roxanne and I would love to watch Greyson for the evening. You two should go out, have fun." David smiles and I nod my head shyly. Matthew's brown eyes are almost sparkling and his wide grin is contagious as he glances over at me._

 _"Ok, that sounds good." I agree, unable to contain a grin of my own._

 ** _End Flashback_**

"You're right - it's not your business." I reply in a harsher tone than I mean. I see the physical reaction when Eric jerks away from me. He opens his mouth to speak but we're interrupted by the sound of the front door opening and Roxanne popping her head inside the vehicle.

"Everything is good, please come inside." She says with a slight smile.

Eric gets out of the car before I can even look in his direction, and I sigh before turning towards Greyson to unbuckle him from his car seat. The door opens and Eric gently reaches for Greyson and lifts his sleeping body to his.

"I can take him." I offer. He shakes his head and offers me a smile that melts my heart. I scoot across the seat and before I can open the door he's done it for me and is offering me his free hand. I take it gratefully and when he twines his fingers with mine I don't pull away. There is something strangely comforting about his touch when we're walking towards the unknown.

Roxanne and Eric are talking quietly as we approach the two men who were previously talking with Clara and Roxanne. Both are wearing black, both are tall but that is where the similarities end. One has pale skin, blonde hair and blue eyes and the other has dark brown hair, tanned skin and dark blue eyes. I am unable to tear my own eyes away from his piercing dark blues and his name slips unconsciously from my lips.

"Tobias…." I say without warning and he moves closer to me. I launch myself into his arms and he wraps them around me.

"Hey." He whispers against my cheek before pressing his lips against it. "I've missed you so much. You remember me?"

"Not everything but I know who you are." I reply. When we finally break apart I see the blonde man standing next to us.

"Tris, do you remember him?" Tobias asks me. I look over at the other man and notice the nervous expression on his face. I shake my head no and see the brief disappointment that passes over his features. "This is my husband Edgar."

"Husband? Oh my gosh I missed your wedding?" I ask as I extend my hand to Edgar and he grasps it in return.

"We didn't have a wedding, just had Zeke marry us in his office. Nothing fancy at all." Edgar offers as we shake hands. He grins slightly before dropping my hand. "I wanted my sister there for any ceremony we had and I knew if we kept at it we'd finally find you."

"Sister?" I whisper and he nods. "You're my brother?"

"Indeed I am." He smiles and I can't help but smile back at him.

"I want to remember you." I reply.

"You will now that we've stopped them from administering those memory serums. You're built to fight them Tris, just like Eric is." Roxanne remarks and somehow I can feel Eric's presence as he takes his place by my side. I reach my hand down to his and he glances over at me with a surprised look before entwining our hands.

"Is this…?" Edgar stammers as he notices Greyson stirring in Eric's arms.

"This is my… I mean our son." I reply. I feel Eric squeeze my hand and I nervously look up at him. He's unable to hide the smile on his face.

"What's his name?" Edgar asks.

"Greyson." I reply. At the sound of his name he turns his face towards me and grins from his spot on Eric's shoulder before nuzzling against his father.

"We should get started." Four says from his place next to Edgar and he ushers us into a hidden tunnel leading underground. Eric keeps his arm securely wrapped around Greyson while his other hand is encasing mine. I don't know why, but I feel safer when he is near. We follow Edgar and Tobias into the windowless underground building and all take a seat around a large rectangular table.

"I need you to tell me everything you know about me, and what circumstances led us to where we are today." Eric begins.

Edgar takes a deep breath before beginning. "As I've already told you both, you are my sister and brother in law. There was a war within the city of Chicago that we believed was orchestrated wholly by Jeanine Matthews with planning help from Max. What we've since learned is that Jeanine was merely a puppet, and she was controlled completely by David. He is who orchestrated the war in Chicago – mostly as a means to drive the divergent population out of the city and into Milwaukee, where he planned to use their genetic makeup to purify his city."

"But from what I understand Jeanine killed the Divergents." Roxanne adds.

"She did. That fact alone was enough to make it so we didn't suspect David, until he had the two of you kidnapped." Four adds. "Jeanine's hunger for power made her go against David's command, and ultimately it led to her demise. When you killed her it put you on his radar as a force to be reckoned with."

"I killed this woman?" Eric asks incredulously.

"Yes. She did terrible things. She deserved it." Edgar replies. Eric immediately tenses and before I can even react Clara has lifted Greyson from his arms.

"Is there another room that this sweet boy and I can go to?" She asks and Tobias opens his mouth to answer.

"You will not take my son away from me." Eric growls as he stands up. I stand with him and rub my hands on his back.

"She's just going to get him out of the room. He's awake now, and this conversation is going to stress us which in turn will stress him." I say as I continue to rub soothing circles on his back.

"It's the next room over." Tobias adds and Eric nods his head once. Clara takes the smiling Greyson out of the room and I take some time to study Edgar. I can see the stress etched on his face, and I've noticed that each time Jeanine is mentioned he's working hard to steel his emotions.

"Who was she to you?" I ask without thinking.

"What?" Edgar replies without masking his surprise.

"Jeanine Matthews. Every time you speak of her, or when she's mentioned I can see the emotions you're trying to mask." I reply.

"Matthews…" Eric murmurs. "Your last name is Matthews." Edgar's blue eyes meet Eric's and both men show the tension in their postures.

"She was my mother, by law, but personally speaking that woman was nothing to me." He replies stoically.

"I killed your mother…." Eric says in a quiet voice.

"Stop right now. You killed a monster that I had to run away from and completely change my identity to avoid. Your actions saved many lives, including your wife's." Edgar replies.

"I need to know what we're up against with my husband." Roxanne says.

"I need to know that I can trust you." Edgar retorts.

"Trust me? The man drugged me, wiped my memory and probably would kill me if I even dared step foot back inside that city. I took his most prized possession with me when I left!" She shouts.

"Prized possession?" I stammer and Roxanne's dark brown eyes widen. "Who is it? Grey? Me?"

"Grey. Before he was born David planned on using either yours or Eric's genes in an attempt to create a cure for genetic damage. But your pregnancy came as a shock to us all. Grey is completely pure – like I said before he's born of two genetically pure divergents, unlike how you and Eric were each born of a non-divergent and a divergent. Do you understand just how many memories than man wiped and then manipulated and implanted to carry through on this plan?"

"Who else besides us?" Eric asks from beside me.

"Our own daughter for one – he wiped Juanita and made it so she didn't even know we were her parents." Roxanne says with disgust.

"Nita is your daughter?" I ask and Roxanne nods. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"I didn't remember that she was. Matthew was the first to start regaining his memories so he helped Nita, and then finally the two of them began to help me." She replies. "We were working on a way to help you when my mistake with David this morning derailed our plans."

"Matthew knows who I am?" I ask quietly and Roxanne's expression softens.

"He didn't at first, but he found out once his memories returned." Roxanne replies.

"He completely stopped coming by. He acted like he barely knew me…" I murmur and Eric stiffens next to me.

"Matthew cares about both Greyson and you a great deal. Once he realized that you were married and had been very much in love with your husband prior to my husband's meddling he knew he needed to stop pursuing you romantically."

"Romantically?" Eric asks in a firm voice. I can tell without looking at him that he is holding his anger in. "You told me he was your friend."

"He is my friend, and only my friend. I was aware from his behavior towards Grey and me that he had more than a friendship in mind but he was always a perfect gentleman. I never wanted more than a friendship no matter how much David pushed for it. Something always held me back. Matthew was perfectly fine waiting for me, but he suddenly stopped coming around and at work he only spoke to me about work related topics." I explain to Eric.

"You didn't want him?" Eric asks. The pained look in his eyes shoots directly to my heart.

"Subconsciously, Tris has always been aware of her life with you. Her memories have been so far manipulated that she doesn't know who you are to her, or what her life was in Chicago before she was kidnapped." Roxanne explains to Eric.

"What are the plans to stop him?" Eric asks Edgar and Tobias.

"It's not just him we're up against." Edgar says carefully. "Andrew Prior is his next in command, and both he and Natalie have been heavily involved in the memory manipulation for both Tris and you."

"No." I whisper.

 ** _Flashback_**

 _"What are we doing here? What do Eric and I have that is so damn important to you? Where is my husband?" I yell as I thrash against the restraints he has used to tie me to the chair._

 _"Beatrice, calm down. Screaming at me will get you nowhere." David replies calmly. The stark whiteness of his office reminds me of the room that Jeanine and later Evelyn held me in while running their experimental sims on me. The memory causes an involuntary shiver to run down my spine._

 _"Where. Is. My. HUSBAND!" I shout again._

 _"Beatrice, this is unnecessary." My father says as he walks into the room._

 _"Dad, what's going on?" I ask._

 _My father has always been a man of great integrity, and I still have hope in my heart that what I was told about my parent's involvement in the multiple attempts to erase my memories and the more serious attempt on Eric's life isn't true._

 _"Beatrice, you have circumvented your purpose here long enough." My father replies._

 _"My purpose? What are you talking about?" I ask._

 _"You were made to help purify genes Beatrice. Your purpose is to cure the damaged. Why do you fight it so?" He replies._

 _"Dad, why would you do this to me? Why would you have any part in this madness?" I ask._

 _"Madness?" He asks incredulously. "You were made solely for this purpose. I just wish you would cooperate without us having to use force."_

 _"Force? What kind of force?" I ask._

 _"This will only hurt for a minute. Sleep well Beatrice." My father coos as he slips the needle into my neck._

 ** _End Flashback_**

"Tris." Eric says quietly from next to me. It's only then that I notice that we're alone. "Talk to me."

"Where'd everyone go? Where's Grey?" I ask as I begin to stand up.

"He's fine, Clara has him and Edgar and Four went to spend a little time getting to know him. They thought we could use a break." He replies gently. "What happened?"

"What do you mean?" I ask.

"You were almost catatonic…."

"A memory." I interrupt. "Of after I was kidnapped. I was screaming at David because I was looking for you. My father came in and he told me I was created as a cure to damaged genes…. He…." I stop talking and am unable to choke back a sob. I don't fight as Eric pulls me to his lap and wraps his arms tightly around me. I bury my face in his chest and let the tears finally fall.

"I don't know exactly what is going on, other than these little snippets of memories coming to me when certain things are said or done. What did they do to me Eric? What did they do to us? We had a life! A child was robbed of his father for ten fucking months!" I scream.

"We will figure this out Tris, and we will make that bastard pay." Eric says as he holds me tightly against his firm body. "I have my son now, and I hope that I have you too."

I nod against his chest and we are still clutching onto each other when the door opens and Edgar walks in carrying our crying son.

"What happened?" I ask as I rush to him. Grey reaches out for me and I take him into my arms.

"He's hungry." Clara replies "I wasn't sure what to give him."

"I can feed him." Eric offers and I shake my head. "I haven't pumped, it's usually just me feeding him." I explain and he nods his head. I notice the sadness in his eyes and I once again remind myself that this is Grey's father. I need to be as inclusive as possible with him. "You can come with us if you'd like."

"We'll all be staying in this bunker, I'll show you to a room." Edgar offers and we follow him out the door. We travel down a small, dark hallway and he shows us inside a room. "We didn't realize you had a baby, but it won't take long for us to get a crib here for him. Christina is organizing supplies for us when she guides the rest of our team here tomorrow. I'll send communications that we need supplies for Greyson."

"Can this Christina person be trusted?" Eric asks.

"She is Tris' closest friend. The two were once like sisters. I believe that Tris would trust her with her life." Edgar offers with a slight smile.

"I'm so sorry, I wish I could remember all of you." I reply.

Edgar opens his mouth to speak but Greyson becomes fussy again. "We'll talk more later, currently my nephew demands his bedtime snack." Edgar replies before ducking out the door and closing it behind him.

Eric helps me change Greyson, paying close attention to diaper changing before finally helping him into one of the sleepers Roxanne packed for him. He keeps his distance as I begin feeding Greyson and for a moment I forget he is in the room with us. Greyson's sleepy grey/blue eyes focus on something over my shoulder and it's only then I realize Eric is standing behind my chair watching us. He doesn't say a word and Grey eventually loses his battle against sleep. Eric wordlessly takes him from my arms and tucks him into the pillows and blankets he's used on the floor to create a temporary, but safe sleeping environment for our son.

"Will this be ok?" He whispers and I nod. I watch as he kisses Grey's forehead before moving so I can do the same.

Eric doesn't leave the room, instead he sits on the lone bed and I move so I'm standing in front of him. He reaches his arms out to me tugs me by my belt loops towards him, eventually wrapping his arms around my waist and resting his head against my chest.

"Are you ok?" I ask. I feel him chuckle against me. "Ok, I know it was a stupid question." I sigh.

"I feel like I should be asking you that question. We've both learned our entire lives as we know them today are lies. I don't even know what I should be feeling at this point." He replies in his quiet deep voice. "I'm a father. Twelve hours ago I didn't know he existed and now I can't imagine being away from him for even a second." He glances lovingly at our son before returning his soft gaze to me. "Or you."

"Me? What about me?" I ask. He pulls away from me slightly and gestures for me to sit down.

"I can't explain the draw I have to you. It's one thing hearing about our life from these people who know us but it's another thing all together to feel the connection we seem to have to each other. It's like some sort of physical need to be close to you." He explains.

I nod my head in agreement. "I feel it too. I want to remember you Eric. I know I haven't been the most open and forthcoming since we've met today but I do want to remember you and the life we have together."

 ** _Flashback_**

 _He says nothing, but his fingers begin tracing up and down my back. We lay together in comfortable silence while I enjoy his gentle touches._

 _"Eric?" I whisper. "Do you remember when I was in training and you had asked me to spar with you for the first time?"_

 _He moves his eyes down to mine and holds eye contact. "Are you talking about that last day before stage two started, I think we had you practicing on the bags and I kept you after dismissal?" I nod along with his description. "What about it?"_

 _"We had a moment, didn't we?" I ask. His expression softens slightly._

 _"You remember it?" He asks and I nod. "You haven't recovered too many memories of us during your training." He murmurs._

 _"No, I haven't but I remembered that one just now. Eric, you were saying something to me before Four came back into the room that day. Do you remember what it was?" I ask._

 _He closes his eyes for a moment as if he's searching his memories for an answer. When he opens his eyes his expression is much softer and he has the trace of a smile on his lips. "I've always been the type who takes what he wants, as you can see, but I didn't want to scare you off. Even though it was obvious you were made to be Dauntless, I knew your Abnegation upbringing may have limited your experiences with the opposite sex." He explains._

 _"Meaning?" I prod. He smiles at me before continuing._

 _"I wanted to kiss you, and I was going to ask you if I could." He says softly._

 _"Why didn't you ever try again after that night?" I ask._

 _"I lost my nerve, and I also couldn't manage to get you alone after that, Four made sure he was always around. I had finally decided to tell you how I felt and went out looking for you one night, but I saw you and Four coming out of the fear landscape room and I knew I'd missed my chance." He explains._

 _"I wish you had of told me." I say._

 _"Would it have changed anything? You wanted him." He argues._

 _"It would have changed everything. I'd wanted you since I saw you standing on the roof. I did start something with Four, and I can't say it was to replace you because I did care for him, but I've always wanted you."_

 _"Why are you telling me this?" He asks._

 _"Because I need you to know when it started for me, and I need you to understand that even when we weren't together I still wanted you. I don't care about your past and the things they told me about today don't matter because you are my everything. I trust you with my life, and I meant it when I said that to you before. You have every part of me Eric." I reply._

 _"Tris, can I kiss you?" He whispers._

 _"You're asking for permission now?" I reply with a smile and he grins at me._

 ** _End Flashback_**

"Eric…" I whisper as I move closer to him. He looks up at me and before he can answer I've leaned into him and pressed my lips against his. At first he seems unwilling to reciprocate but before I can pull away he's wrapped his arms around me and I feel him licking my lips for entrance, which I immediately grant him. I straddle his lap, placing my knees on the bed on either side of his hips and I unconsciously grind against his obvious erection.

"Have you been with anyone else?" I ask quietly as he moves his lips down my neck.

He jerks his head away from me and bores his grey eyes into mine. "Are you fucking kidding me Tris?" He growls.

"It's a fair question. You had no idea you were married." I explain.

"Oh, so you were with other people?" He asks angrily.

"No!" I whisper shout.

"Then what makes you think I was?" He retorts.

"Because of your past… I mean you've been with a lot of women…" I begin hesitantly.

"Tris." He says firmly. "What are you talking about?"

I shake my head as I try to figure out what my scrambled memory is trying to tell me. I have vague memories of women talking about Eric's promiscuity, but no matter how hard I try I can't put these conversations or memories into context.

"I don't exactly know. I have these weird memories of conversations maybe? Women that would talk about your…um… experiences with them…." I finish with a shrug.

"The only woman I have any memory of is you. I've been with no one since you Tris. I haven't wanted to." He replies.

"You remembered me?" I ask.

"I remember things about us, yes. The more I'm with you the more I remember. I think subconsciously I never quite forgot you. I know how I feel about you." Eric replies before leaning in to kiss me again.

Everything about him is familiar to me - the way his lips feel against mine, the warmth of his hands around me and the soft sounds he makes as his lips travel from mine to my neck and ears.

"You're everything I've dreamed you would be." He whispers huskily against my ear and I jerk away from him.

"You've said that to me before." I say and he nods his head.

"I know. I remember saying it to you the first time I kissed you."

I open my mouth to reply but a yawn comes out instead, causing Eric to chuckle lightly.

"I should let you both rest; it's been a long day." He offers as he moves towards the door.

"Where are you going?" I ask.

"I'm sure they have another room for me. I'd like somewhere close to you both, but I'm not sure what the exact arrangements are." He replies softly.

"Stay." I command.

"You're tired, it's fine Tris get some rest. I'm tired too." He argues.

"Sleep in here with us. Please." I reply quietly and the smile I get in return is answer enough.

"I will. I need to talk to Edgar though, will you be ok for a little while?" He asks.

"Yes, of course. But please come back when you're done." I reply.

Not even an hour later I hear the gentle creaking of the bedroom door and I watch as Eric first checks on Grey before walking towards me. I pretend to be asleep and I feel his lips on my forehead before he walks back towards where Grey is soundly sleeping on the floor.

"Eric." I whisper, causing him to abruptly turn towards me. "Lay with me."

I watch as he crosses in the dark room and stops at the bed. "Are you sure?"

"Yes, please." I reply and within seconds he has crawled into bed next to me.

As I lie in bed wrapped in the arms of the man I now know is my husband and Greyson's father I feel a sense of relief. His even breathing is soothing and even though I haven't been able to calm my nerves enough to fall asleep I do feel safe for the first time that I can remember. I trace my fingers up and down his strong arms and hear the soft sigh emit from behind me.

There's a sense of foreboding as my body tenses. I close my eyes and fight the nausea that begins to churn in my stomach. The soft noises of my son and husband disappear and I feel as if someone or something is reaching directly for me as I hesitantly open my eyes. I'm met with the darkness of the room and slowly my heart rate starts to return to normal once I realize it's just the three of us in the room.

The sleeping monster inside of me won't rest for long.


	41. Chapter 41

**AN: Writers block is a real thing. Thank you all for sticking with me. Hope you enjoy and I promise I'm trying to get past the block and back into a regular posting schedule with my incomplete stories. I appreciate all of you who are still reading :)**

Greyson is sleeping soundly on my shoulder as I pace back and forth in the hallway outside of the room that we are sharing with Eric. When I woke up earlier, I acted on autopilot to feed and change Grey, but now panic has set in and the urge to flee this bunker is overwhelming.

I begin a mental checklist as I make my way through the darkened hallways of the bunker. If I find my way out, it'll just be with the clothes on our backs, but we can figure this out. I can make it back to Milwaukee and my parents. They can't really be the monsters that everyone has made them out to be. The people in this bunker are the real monsters.

I turn a corner and internally curse when I recognize the corridor as one I've already walked through tonight. This bunker is an absolute labyrinth of confusing hallways that look practically identical, and the one exit that I'm aware of is damn near impossible to find.

"Tris?" The whisper of my name startles me and I realize I am almost touching the person who called me. His intense dark blue eyes show the weariness of worry and lack of sleep.

"Tobias…" I whisper back. "We were… you were… why?" I stumble on my words and he puts his finger to his mouth in a quieting gesture as he nods to where Greyson stirs slightly on my shoulder.

"Slow down." He whispers back. "Let's put Greyson back to bed." He whispers and I shake my head. "Did something happen?" He asks.

"I…" I stumble over my words while I search my muddled memory. I've been having flashbacks for the past fifteen days and nights that we've been here, and tonight is no different. My erratic behavior and refusal to open up have caused a severe tension between Eric and me, and the stress has spilled over to every strategy meeting we've had in our efforts to overthrow David.

"Let me take him, you two should talk." Edgar says as he walks towards Tobias and me.

"No." I reply as tears spill down my cheeks. Edgar slowly approaches me and gently wipes the tears from my face.

"Hey, it's ok, you've been through so much Tris. There's no one in this place that doesn't love you and want what's best for Greyson." He says to me quietly.

It's been over two full weeks since Roxanne drove us away from Milwaukee and into this completely new life. Since then my memories have steadily returned, in a way it's as if I've been watching a playback of my life. Many of our friends from Chicago have joined us in this bunker, including my best friend Christina and yet I've felt like I'm in a constant state of paranoia.

"Tris, its ok I promise you. I won't let him out of my sight." Edgar prods and I reluctantly hand my sleeping boy over to him. Edgar kisses Tobias' cheek before walking down the hallway. I watch as he disappears into their bedroom with my son sleeping soundly on his shoulder.

"You took me to her." I say as I turn my attention to Tobias. "You left me there for dead."

"I did." He says quietly as he nods his head. "I was under a mind controlling simulation."

I watch him carefully before speaking again. "We were lovers."

"We were, yes. We got involved when you first transferred to Dauntless, and we remained involved throughout your initiation."

"I have memories of living with you but also getting involved with Eric at the same time…." I trail off. The blurred lines of where my relationship with Tobias ended and my relationship with Eric began have been bothering me.

He takes a deep breath before speaking. "Yes. I was lying to you to sneak away from the compound to see my mother – "

"She died when we were children…" I reply defensively.

"No, she was very much alive, and ultimately she was working with Jeanine to kill the divergents. She used me in an effort to get to you." He replies solemnly.

"This is so confusing." I retort and he nods.

"You and I weren't exactly compatible, I was controlling and confused by my own sexuality and you were a sheltered Abnegation who yearned to be free. I could tell that you wanted Eric when we were together, and my competitive nature when it came to him overrode my judgment in doing what was right. Besides, I thought at one point he was working for Jeanine. I was wrong." Tobias replies.

"So, I cheated on you?" I question.

"It's not as black and white as you may think. While we were technically together, it wasn't a healthy or happy relationship and you were questioning me and everything I stood for." He replies. There's no trace of anger or dishonesty in his demeanor and it relaxes me a bit.

"Tobias, I've had some really disturbing memories of Eric… things that seem to be almost impossible." I reply.

"Tris, none of this will make complete sense until you get your memory back in full. Just know that you and I were both tortured and put through these simulations in an attempt to prove or disprove our purity. These sims were designed in a way that showed the people we cared about the most in both the best and worst light possible. Eric is a great man who loves you very much. The two of you were very much in love before your memories were manipulated and you both wanted a family." He says.

"How do I know you're not working for them too?" I ask with tears I can't contain spilling down my cheeks.

"Oh Tris." He sighs and pulls me into his strong arms. "You don't, but once your memories return you will trust us fully again." Tobias replies softly.

"Peter… I feel connected to him and I somehow trust him. I have a lot of memories of him, but none of the woman who's here with him." I reply.

"Daphne is Peter's wife, and you didn't know her well. She's a good person Tris, and Peter is too. He was another whom we were unsure of when the initial revolution happened. We thought he was working for Jeanine too, and it came out later that he was also part of Eric's team to overthrow Jeanine and Max. The two of you also worked together to devise a plan to bring Evelyn down, but that's another story all together. Just know he's also one of the good guys and the connection you feel to him is because the two of you were good friends. Eric and he are friends too." Tobias explains.

"Eric actually likes another male? I don't believe it." I grumble and Tobias looks over at me. "You see how he's been since Matthew arrived."

Nita arrived several days after we did and while Eric was a bit leery of her he trusted Roxanne enough to extend the same trust to who we now knew was her daughter. She was an integral part of strategizing to infiltrate David and his leadership regime.

Matthew's arrival several days later caused the tension that was already bubbling between Eric and me to finally erupt, and we had what has to be the worst verbal fight I've ever had with someone. Eric hated everything about my friendship with Matthew, but what infuriated him was the way our son interacted with the only father figure he'd ever known. While in the two weeks we've been here, Eric and Greyson have bonded significantly and we've all been working towards Greyson knowing implicitly that Eric is his dad. Matthew's arrival has been bittersweet at best – while I am excited to see my friend, his presence has caused a rift between my husband and I that I'm not sure can be repaired.

"You have to at least see it from Eric's point of view." Tobias argues. I roll my eyes but he continues. "He's threatened by him." He shrugs.

"Threatened by Matthew?" I scoff. "Eric outweighs Matthew by at least a hundred pounds and he's probably a good half a foot taller than him."

"Not physically threatened. Matthew had the life he missed. He had Greyson and he had you." Tobias replies softly.

"He didn't have us…" I argue but stop speaking when I see the look on Tobias' face.

"For all intents and purposes he was Grey's father, and the closest thing you had to a partner after your kidnapping. Eric found out a lot about Matthew, including that he was there for Grey's birth."

"He wasn't there! I didn't meet him until I had already returned to work…"

"Tris, he was there. He was there for all of it, your memories of Matthew are after both of you had received the advanced version of the memory altering serum."

"How do you know?" I ask.

"Chris and Marlene hacked into all of the old surveillance footage and Eric has spent hours watching it. He finally got to see Greyson's birth, but he also saw Matthew there cutting the cord. It looks like there were some feelings there between the two of you, but after pouring over the footage he was never able to see anything physical between you. It hit him hard Tris. You do realize he has his full memory back, don't you?" He asks.

"I didn't know." I reply as I shake my head.

"Do the two of you talk at all anymore?" He asks incredulously and I shake my head.

"We avoid each other for the most part. We talk about Greyson, and we work together in our strategy sessions. That's it." I reply. I realize in this very moment that my own husband is suffering greatly and I've in essence turned my back on him. "He must hate me." I say softly.

"Quite the opposite Tris, he's been miserable without you. He's developed patience when it comes to you, at least as patient as Eric Coulter is capable of being." He chuckles. "He loves you and he'll wait forever for you if that's what it takes."

There is comfortable silence in the hallway and Tobias and I have both slid down to a seated position with our backs leaning against the wall and our shoulders touching.

"I understand why I can't sleep, but why aren't you? How is that you were awake and wandering the halls in the middle of the night?" I ask.

"Worry I suppose." He replies. "Life has been unpredictable and downright frightening for the past few years. We'd never given up hope finding the two of you alive, even though it'd been almost two years since you disappeared. There are times that no matter how sure I am about the love I have for my husband and the life we plan on building together once this war is finally over that I still worry that the chaos and constant state of fear is what holds us together." He sighs. "The practical part of my brains knows better, but I guess the bottom line is I'm ready to look forward and not back."

"Me too." I reply with a sigh. "I should go back to Grey."

"He's fine Tris. Edgar loves spending time with him too. You aren't alone in this anymore, you have an entire family here with you who've missed almost a year of his life." He explains gently.

"I never knew. It's… frustrating isn't even a strong enough word for how I feel about this. I am angry at him for manipulating my memories, and for taking me away from my family. But, I feel like continuing to be angry and paranoid is killing the relationships I'm trying so hard to build now."

"Your anger is certainly warranted." He replies.

"I was going to leave." I admit.

"Milwaukee?" He asks. I shake my head in the negative.

"Tonight, when you found me, I was going to just leave." I admit.

"Why?" He almost hisses. "Tris, where on earth would you go? And with Greyson, who has a target on his back right now?"

"Tobias, I know!" I reply angrily. "I was emotional and not thinking rationally and I had remembered those awful things and I panicked. I didn't do it, I was trying to calm myself when you found me."

"Tris, I need you to promise me that if you have these thoughts again you'll come to me. Or Edgar, Chris, Peter… hell even Matthew, just anyone who you trust to be able to talk to you about what you're feeling." He pleads.

"You actually understand me." I reply off handedly and he smiles.

"I do. I know exactly how it feels to have my memories tampered with, and I know how it felt when I finally was able to think clearly. Besides Eric, there is no one else in this place who could possibly know what you're going through." He replies.

The quiet blankets us again and we hear footsteps approaching us. I watch as Matthew turns the corner and walks over to where Tobias and I sit.

"Insomnia seems to be a common theme here." Matthew sighs. "I'm sorry for interrupting, I can move along."

"No, stay. It's fine." I reply. Matthew furrows his brows while looking down at me. "Please, I've barely seen you since you came back."

"Tris, I've caused numerous issues between you and your husband." He argues.

"Sit. You're my friend and eventually Eric is going to have to accept that." I reply. Matthew and Tobias exchange glances, but when Tobias nods towards the floor Matthew sits down across from us. "What's keeping you up, Matt?"

"The same as the two of you I'd guess. I'm not a trained soldier like the two of you, but I feel like there should be more for me to contribute rather than hiding away from everything in a bunker. People can die out there, and here I sit safe and sheltered from it all. David may not have the training that Dauntless has, but he is brilliant." He sighs.

"Do you think we're capable of bringing David down?" I ask. Matthew's face is pensive and I feel Tobias shift next to me.

"Absolutely." Tobias replies immediately. "Tris we are so close already. Our troops are in place, and we've been successful in keeping this location completely off the map. They may have the intelligence on their side, but we have access to most of their systems with what Christina and Marlene have already hacked in to. We're always a step ahead of him"

"It's like a chess game with David – moves and countermoves." Matthew agrees.

"Is he the end?" I whisper. The chill of silence between us is the answer I already expected. "He isn't, is he?"

"No one really knows. Most of the people who worked for him only did so under mind control. Roxanne, Eric, Nita and I are prime examples of that, as are you Tris. There are only two others who appear to be working for him willingly." Matthew replies.

"My parents." I reply and Matthew meets my eyes while he nods his head. "We're going to have to kill them too, aren't we?"

"The plan is to capture them and test them to see if there are traces of mind controlling serum in their bloodstream." Tobias, Matthew and I all jerk our heads up in the direction of the deep voice. I find myself looking deep into the silvery eyes of my husband. "It's quite possible they are also under his mind controlling serum as well. We have a plan and we've directed our soldiers to take David down under any means necessary, however we've issued orders to bring the Prior's in alive." Eric replies. His calm demeanor breaks slightly once he glances over at Matthew. "Why are the three of you sitting in a darkened hallway at three o'fucking clock in the morning?" He growls directing his question at Matthew.

"I couldn't sleep, the two of them were sitting here and I was invited to join them. There is nothing…" Matthew begins and Eric cuts him off.

"You need to stay away from my wife." Eric says in a low and menacing voice.

"You need to stop it!" I retort. "I invited him to sit with us and he is my friend. Please."

Eric looks at me and his expression softens. He crouches down in front of me and cups my cheek in his hand. "You've been crying." He whispers.

"I was going to leave…" I admit again as the tears trickle down my cheeks. Eric's eyes widen and his clenched jaw is enough to warn me that he's holding his temper in check. He looks over at Tobias.

"Greyson?" His one word is a question and Tobias nods.

"He's with Edgar, more than likely sleeping in our room." He replies. "We will take care of him for the rest of the night, you take care of her."

"Thank you." Eric reaches his hand towards a surprised Tobias, who grasps his hand and shakes.

"Not necessary. You two are family." He replies.

"I should go." Matthew says as he stands. He glances nervously towards Eric and then back at me. "If you need anything you know where to find me.

"Thank you." I reply and he nods before walking away. Tobias stands and smiles at us before making his way down the hallway towards his room.

Eric sits down in front of me and quietly stews. His arrogance is one of the things that's kept us fighting almost nonstop since reuniting. After that first night we were here, our quarreling and bickering has kept us separated, only coexisting long enough to parent our son and to participate in the daily meetings and status reports from our troops who have been sent to find David.

"Can we talk about it?" He finally asks in a calmer voice than I had expected. I meet his eyes and find none of the anger I've grown accustomed to these past two weeks. He looks apprehensive, and there's another emotion I've not seen from him before: fear.

"I've had a lot of memories return. They haven't always been pleasant, and I didn't know how to deal with them. Talking to Tobias helped." I reply vaguely.

He nods his head. "We had this same problem the last time your memory was wiped. Peter was able to help you then." He replies.

"Have you and I had these issues often?" I ask cautiously.

"Never to this extent Tris, but yes. You've had your memories tampered with before, and received the memory serum as well. With proper treatment you were able to expel the serum quite rapidly, however you've been subjected to almost two years of daily dosing and have received no anti-serum to combat its effects. You've been left to fight it biologically and it's going to take some time." He replies.

"I understand why Matthew makes you uncomfortable now." I reply quietly. Eric's eyes narrow.

"Really?" He finally asks.

"Yes, Tobias told me about the camera footage." Eric's jaw clenches and his cheeks flush a bit. "Eric, I don't have a lot of accurate memories about my life in Milwaukee but I do know that he and I have never been more than friends. I may not have known who you were or what we had but somehow I still couldn't forget you."

His expression softens. "I've never forgotten you either Tris."

"Grey is _your_ son Eric. Even before we were brought together again I've never once misled our son into thinking anyone else was his father. He loves you, I mean you can see it just in the short time we've been together here."

"I love him so much Tris. I swear as soon as I saw him that fatherly instinct kicked in. I can't imagine a life without him." He replies.

I look at Eric and realize just how exhausted he actually is. His beard is longer and in need of a trim, along with his wild and curly hair that is messily falling over his forehead and touching his ears as well. His silvery grey eyes are bloodshot and the dark circles below are the direct result of the many sleepless nights that he's suffered due to the plans to end David's regime once and for all.

"You're exhausted." I say quietly as I reach for one of his hands.

"I'm fine. It's you who needs rest Tris. When's the last time you've slept an entire night?" He asks. I watch his thumb as it idly rubs against the back of my hand.

"The night I slept beside you." I whisper. "Eric, I'm so sorry. You've been going non-stop and I've been fighting with you every step of the way. I've been so selfish."

"Tris, its fine…"

"No, it's not fine. Everyone here has been trying to protect Greyson and me and all I've done is be a fucking paranoid bitch…" My voice raises with every word and I pause to calm myself. "I'm sitting here, unable to do anything to protect our son while the people who I know I love spend days and nights working towards bringing them down. You've risked your life repeatedly for me and I can't understand why you would when all I've done since we've been here is be a hateful and ungrateful bitch to you."

"Are you done hating yourself yet?" He replies with a smirk.

"You know I fucking hate that smirk." I growl and he grins at me.

"I do know that, and I love that you finally remember it." He replies with a wide grin. I watch as he strokes his messy beard.

 ** _Flashback_**

 _"_ _The beard is sexy." I say as he scowls at his reflection in the hand held mirror. "Babe, you've been in a hospital bed for over a month, you're not going to look perfect."_

 _"_ _I look… like…a lumber…jack." He scoffs._

 _"_ _I like it." I shrug. "But if you want me to shave it I will."_

 _He glances at me before looking at his reflection again. "No… but can… you tr…tr…tr…" His stutter frustrates him and he slams the mirror down on his tray, shattering it._

 _"_ _Baby." I say softly as I reach for his bloodied hand. I begin to pull the shards of glass from his fingers and feel the tremble of his hand. I look up at him and see him crying. "Oh baby, it's fine, we'll get this cleaned up and I'll trim your beard. It's all fine. Shhh." I cradle his cut hand in mine before leaning towards him and resting my forehead against his._

 _"_ _I don't deserve… you…. I… don't…" He whispers._

 _"_ _You deserve the world, my love. The moon, stars, sun, clouds, everything. You are my everything. If anything, I don't deserve you." I reply softly. "You've been my rock for so long, you've stood by my side when I had absolutely no memory of who you were to me and you've helped me become a better person."_

 _"_ _I just wish… that I could… remem… remem… fuck!" He shouts, slamming his fist onto the tray in front of him._

 _"_ _Baby, listen to me, please. You've come a long ways already. We've gotten through this before, both of us. They've wiped both of our memories before and every time we've beaten it." I reply._

 _"_ _What if I never… can… rem..em…ber?" He stutters out suddenly._

 _"_ _I'll tell you what you've always told me, and that is that I'll have to work that much harder to make you fall in love with me again. You're the love of my life Eric, and it doesn't matter what anyone tries to do they will never succeed in breaking us." I reply as I clean the last bit of blood from his cut hand. "Nothing was too deep, so no stitches needed."_

 _"_ _I… already… love you." He replies with a slight smile._

 _"_ _Good, because I am madly in love with you." I grin back at him._

 _"_ _I just… want our… memories. Things we experienced… things… we did… all… gone." He grumbles._

 _"_ _I've said the same thing to you many times. You always told me we'd make new memories." I reply._

 _"_ _Can we start… in…the… shower?" He grins wickedly at me._

 _"_ _I believe we've already made several new memories in the shower Eric." I reply with mock disdain._

 _"_ _Can never have… too many good memories… can we?" He grins in return. "Besides my… beard… needs… tr… tr…trim…." He pouts._

 _"_ _Consider my arm twisted." I grin._

 ** _End Flashback_**

"I could trim it for you." I say tentatively. He furrows his brows at me and shoots me a questioning look. "Your beard. I've done it before."

"Yes, you have." He nods in agreement. "I'd like that." He stands and offers his hand to help me up which I gratefully accept.

We walk along the empty hallway in a comfortable silence, Eric jumping slightly when I reach for his hand. He threads his fingers with mine and brings me to the room he's been staying in. We quietly gather the necessary supplies to trim his beard and move into the small attached bathroom. I watch as he pulls his loose t-shirt over his head and my eyes trace the muscular plane of his back. He turns towards me and I look at the tattoo of a large willow tree that's partially in flames, it covers his entire side and the branches snake around his front and back.

It's beautiful.

As I work over him I notice his grey eyes never leave me, silently he follows my every move. "I love watching you do this. It reminds me of the days in Dauntless when I was a customer in your tattoo shop." He remarks.

"I remember giving you this tattoo." I say as I lightly trace my fingers across the large willow tree on his ribcage.

He closes his eyes and hums an affirmation. I lean towards him and brush my lips against his. He gasps slightly but I take advantage of his surprise and deepen the kiss. He doesn't hesitate in pulling me down on his lap and threading his hands in my hair, effectively pulling me closer. We are lost in each other, tongues dancing in sync and hands alternating between tenderly touching to grabbing with need and desire. I'm suddenly aware of Eric tugging my shirt up and I lift my arms to allow for him to pull it completely off. Within seconds he's torn both my bra and panties off and I'm tugging his sleep pants down while he clears everything off of the sink with a swoop of his arm, sending everything clattering to the floor. He picks me up and sits me down on the counter without either of us breaking our frantic kissing and it's only when I feel his erection pressing against my entrance do either of us find words.

"Baby…" He whispers. "We can't…"

"I want this." I whisper back.

"Tris, we've barely spoken… I can't." He replies. He tries to pull away from me but I wrap my legs tighter around him.

"Please don't…" I reply and I'm aware of him wiping the tears away from my cheeks. "Please don't reject me…."

"Oh Tris… I will never reject you. I want you in every possible way, but I need for you to be sure. You're crying right now." He replies as he kisses my forehead.

 ** _Flashback_**

 _"Baby?" He calls out. I look up at him and try everything in my power to keep my composure. "Did I hurt you?"_

 _I can't reply because I know as soon as I open my mouth I'll cry, I try to avoid eye contact but he reaches out and tips my chin up so I'm looking at him. I lose the battle and the tears tumble down my cheeks. "I'm sorry, please don't cry, I'm so sorry." He says as he wraps his arms around me and pulls me close to his chest._

 _"Stop." I croak in a tear choked voice._

 _"I can't, I obviously hurt you and I'm so fucking sorry. What can I do?" He says._

 _"You didn't hurt me at all. I loved what we just did." I reply earnestly._

 _"Why are you crying?" He asks as he gently rocks us side to side._

 _"Because we finally are us again. We're not distracting each other, we're not only halfway present when we're making love, and we weren't in a rush because someone might walk in or we have to go to a fucking trial or execution. We are finally us. It feels like our true first time. I'm a girl and I got all emotional." I explain nervously. I'm horrified at the reaction I'm having and can only imagine that Eric is feeling self-conscious because of my emotional outburst._

 _I can feel his body relax as he pulls me closer to his chest. "You are so right. That was amazing, and it felt so right. I was so afraid I had hurt you when you reacted the way you did."_

 _"I loved every bit of it." I reply. He smiles before leaning down and capturing my mouth in a deep kiss._

 ** _End Flashback_**

"It's not what you think. Eric, my memories are all scrambled but there's one thing I know and that is I love you." I reply.

"Tris…"

"I. Love. You." I emphasize each word. "Please don't think this is some sort of break down. I'm a girl, I get emotional remember?" I reply and he laughs.

"You haven't changed." He replies. "I love you so much Tris."

"I love you too. I don't remember everything about our life before but I swear to you I know exactly how I feel about you as my husband and as the father of our child. I'm so sorry for rejecting _you._ I realize how difficult this must be for you, and I can't promise it won't be difficult at times but I want my husband back. Please Eric." I plead.

"You never have to worry baby, I'll never leave you or Grey. The two of you are my life." He says in a serious tone.

"Make love to me Eric." I whisper and he immediately kisses me.

I feel his strong arms wrap around me and lift me from my seated position on the counter top. He carries me towards the bed, never removing his mouth from mine as he lowers me slowly onto the bed. He finally breaks away from me to catch his breath, and he gently strokes my face before speaking to me.

"Our first time together we treated it as almost a distraction. I've regretted that, only because I didn't take my time to truly appreciate and savor you." He says.

"Amity." I reply and he nods. "The day we left Abnegation… after the war."

"Yes." He nods. "I was in love with you then. But, our memories had been altered." He whispers the last part as he begins moving his warm lips down my neck.

With one small adjustment he slides inside of me slowly, allowing me time to adjust to him. "Eric." I whisper as he moves against me.

His moves are slow and deliberate and his kisses soft and sensual as he continues to move with me. We easily fall into a rhythm and are completely lost in each other while our bodies move as one. His skin is warm and smooth against mine and I run my short nails up and down his back. I find myself unable to hold back as intense pleasure washes over me and I find myself repeating his name.

He lifts his head and looks into my eyes. "I'm so in love with you." He says before spilling inside of me.

We lay together for a few minutes just catching our breath and coming down from our high. I trace patterns on his chest while lying in the crook of his arm and I feel him doing the same on my back.

"I've missed you." He says.

"I'm not on birth control." I blurt out at the same time. His hand stops moving and I can tell he's holding his breath. He exhales slowly before I speak again. "I mean, I wasn't sexually active in Milwaukee and David suggested giving my body a break from anything altering… which how fucking ironic is that considering he was pumping me full of memory serums… I mean, really what kind of sociopath goes on about purifying my body while he's trying to erase every fucking memory I've ever made… and…"

"I don't care about the lack of birth control." Eric interrupts. "You're rambling."

"I do that when I'm nervous about something, but I assume you already know that from experience." I reply and his chest rumbles below me as he laughs.

"You could say that." He agrees. A loud beep emits from his tablet that's plugged in on the nightstand next to me. He reaches over me to grab it and I take the opportunity to tug on his nipple rings.

"I've always loved these." I muse. He sits up suddenly and the movement drops me to my side. "Gee, thanks…"

"We have to get dressed now. The perimeter has been penetrated." He says as he hurriedly tosses my clothes towards me.

"What does that mean?" I ask as I dress frantically with him. Before he can answer we hear banging on the door. Eric pulls his pants on and throws the door open to find Zeke, Lynn and Will on the other side. They quickly averts their eyes when they notice my halfway dressed state and Eric and I finish dressing as he begins to speak.

"What's going on Zeke?" Eric asks. Zeke opens his mouth to reply just as Edgar storms in with Tobias pulling his arm.

"What the hell is going on? Who sent that report in?" Edgar seethes as Tobias tries to keep him from Zeke. I have no memories of ever seeing my brother angry, and his red face and flared nostrils are foreign to me.

"It came from Peter and Uriah, it's a positive visual and also fingerprint ID." Zeke replies and then turns towards Eric. "You're under arrest for conspiracy."

"What?" Eric spits. Zeke and Will quickly handcuff a flabbergasted Eric.

"What is happening here? What are you doing?" I ask and the hard look on Zeke's face betrays little emotion as he replies.

"We have a prisoner in custody who has implicated Eric in plans to overthrow the government." He replies.

"Who would do that? Who did you arrest?" I ask.

"Jeanine Matthews." Zeke replies as he and Will forcibly move Eric away from me and into the hallway.

"She's dead!" I scream at them while being held back by Lynn. "You all know she's dead! Eric, tell them!" My husband hangs his head and says nothing, refusing to make eye contact. "Eric, you killed her! I remember that, you killed her during the war. Say something!" I shout.

"Let's go." Zeke commands and he and Will turn Eric away from me.

"Eric!" I shout at their retreating figures. "Eric, look at me, please!" I cry out fighting against Lynn's tight grip.

He never looks back.


	42. Chapter 42

**AN: Hello again - is there anyone out there? :)**

 **I hate excuses and the truth is I've been crazy busy with work and real life, and I'm working through writers block along with it. Writing came so easily to me during times where I wasn't happy in my real life, and now that those circumstances have changed it seems harder for me to put my thoughts together for my stories. I appreciate all of you who have continued to follow, favorite and review. I renew my promise to finish every last one of these stories, and I refuse to put anything out there that I feel isn't my best attempt - hence the extremely slow updates.**

 **This one has a few chapters left to wrap up the story of our tortured heroes. Hope you enjoy.**

There are times that I truly miss the quiet comfort of Abnegation. The rough grey stone walls of my childhood home were always cool, just like the one my hand is resting against. I trace my fingers along the small cracks and imperfections, thinking back to a much simpler time in my life. The sound of the front door opening and my dad knocking the mud and dirt off of his shoes before coming inside after a long day at work, or the smell of the stew my mom would serve, knowing it was his favorite meal.

"You're nowhere near okay, are you sweetheart?"

I realize I had been staring off into space when Clara gently places her hand on my arm while asking the one question that mostly everyone else has avoided since this entire mess started several weeks ago.

Eric's arrest last week threw me completely off my already teetering axis, and his refusal to speak to me since his incarceration has been pure hell. Eric is being held in Chicago, in the faction formerly known as Candor, which is almost two hours away from where we continue to live in our underground bunker.

Roxanne had been instrumental in keeping me as focused as possible, she was able to understand me in a way no one else could since her husband betrayed her trust in the worst possible way with his relentless pursuit for the perfect genetic sequence. But just two short days ago Roxanne had to deal with the reports of a violent death of her husband and the father of her only child.

Our attempts at a non-violent apprehension of David were for naught when he barricaded himself in his office and set off an explosion, destroying all of the research and evidence of his war involvement along with himself. Teams of forensic scientists from all of the major cities were brought in to make a positive identification of what was left of David, the process itself hell for both Roxanne and Nita as the husband and father they both once loved was reduced to particles only identifiable by DNA.

Both of my parents were caught without any struggle and are incarcerated in the same facility that Eric is also being held in, and my attempts to visit them have been denied until they can be questioned under truth serum.

"I'm trying to be." I reply. Clara's dark blue eyes soften and she smiles at me as she squeezes my forearm. "I can't thank you enough for everything you've done to help Grey and me."

"Tris you don't have to thank me at all, the two of you are important to me. You're the only family I have left, you know?" She replies with that warm smile I've grown to love.

"Eric is very lucky to have someone like you Clara." I reply. Her smile falters a bit and she sighs.

"There's something I should have told you." She begins. "This is a complicated story, and I hope once you hear it all that you will understand why I've had to keep it to myself for so long."

I immediately tense, and I can tell from Clara's posture and body language that whatever secrets she is holding inside are serious enough to change the dynamic of the relationship we've built.

"I can't… I should go…" I stammer and she squeezes my arm again.

"Please hear me out. I can assure you that no harm will come to you or that precious boy." She gestures towards the bedroom where Greyson is currently sleeping. "I meant it when I said you are my family. Tris, Eric is my grandson."

My eyes widen in surprise but she continues speaking before I can say a word.

"Before you ask, he doesn't know. He never met me before they brought him in to lead Detroit, and I'd been given the same memory altering serum for so long that I had no idea who he was when Roxanne showed up a month ago. I think you are familiar with the different ways that these horrible serums can be administered without our knowledge, from what I understand there was a sector of Chicago that administered a peace serum through their food." She comments idly and I nod. "The memory altering serum was given to the residents of Detroit in a similar fashion, however David dosed anyone who he deemed too close to the situation with extreme amounts in an effort to reprogram us. I was one of those individuals, since he knew that Eric's mother was my daughter, and I had once lived in Chicago as well."

"You were Erudite?" I asked and she nods.

"I was indeed. My husband Howard and I raised our daughter Elizabeth there. We chose to leave the city when that Jeanine Matthews started her rise, and we tried to get Elizabeth and Kevin to leave with the boys. Unfortunately, they never believed that Jeanine was anything other than the perfect outward persona she projected. Their blind trust in that woman got them killed." She explains with tears in her eyes. "I'd been told that Eric was a traitor to his faction, and it wasn't until recently that I knew anything of his involvement with Jeanine Matthews and her war."

"You're saying he's guilty of what they're accusing him of?" I ask.

"Absolutely not. Tris, you realize that your city was monitored by David, almost every move that Eric made was recorded, along with others who lived in Chicago. There's no proof of what Jeanine has alleged." Clara replies. "If nothing else there is recorded proof of his attempts to stop her. Your friends Marlene and Christina have the archived footage already, they worked with Matthew and Nita's team to move the footage to a secure database. Eric is innocent."

"Then why are they holding him? Why won't he speak to me?" I ask.

"He has no idea he's innocent in all of this. You see, he knew Jeanine was alive, and he worked with her many times in Detroit. We all did. He doesn't know what he did or didn't do when he was dealing with the effects of the memory altering serums." Clara explains.

"You've talked to him." I accuse angrily and Clara nods. "He will see you but not me? I'm his wife, I'm the mother of his child and he's turned his back on me and left me here to believe he's a monster."

"He thinks he's protecting you." She interrupts.

"From what?" I retort. "David is dead, my parents are in custody, Jeanine is in custody and dammit so is almost anyone else who even had the slightest tie to him. They've relentlessly questioned Nita and Roxanne, hell it's sickening what they've put them through knowing that even though David was a fucking monster the two of them still are grieving his loss. Who does he think he has to protect me from now Clara?"

"He's protecting you from himself. He thinks he's guilty of treason. They put him under truth serum and he failed miserably, and they also know he's resistant to most serums so it's an even bigger mess for Eric. They've gotten a man named Jack Kang from Chicago involved, apparently there is a machine that can be used when a person has resisted the truth serum. That is scheduled for this evening."

"Jack doesn't allow for closed door testimony." I reply excitedly. "What time is this happening?"

"In a little over three hours." Clara replies after checking her watch. "You know this man?"

"I do. I remember him well. I'm fairly certain that I remember almost everything about my life. I also know that I need to be wherever they are having Eric testify. I have to see my husband. He also needs to know who you really are to him Clara." I urge and she shakes her head.

"He's dealing with too much as it is. I can't add to it." She argues.

"He misses his family tremendously and he's carried so much guilt over their death. You realize that Jeanine had them killed because he refused to cooperate with her, don't you?' I ask.

"Yes, I've learned that thanks to your friends' hard work in retrieving the data they could before David destroyed it all." She replies. Clara is strong, much like my husband, but the sadness in her eyes when she speaks of her family is obvious. "That was not his fault. That was the fault of that vile woman. What she did to my grandson was disgusting."

"Then you must realize just how much the two of you need each other right now. He's hurting so much and pushing everyone away, except you, because of the bond the two of you already share. Clara, my memory may be out of sorts for some things, but I know my husband. He needs to know that he actually does have family, and that you love him regardless of what accusations they throw at him, and he especially needs to know that you don't blame him for the death of his parents and brother."

"Why on earth would he think anyone would blame him for that?" Clara asks incredulously.

"He blames himself. He has for years now. We need to go to him." I reply. "We're going to Chicago."

I go into the bedroom and pick up my sleeping boy, who barely stirs as I hold him against my chest. His breath is warm against my neck and he sighs in his sleep, completely unaware of the seriousness of our current situation. For this I am incredibly grateful.

"Who will watch the baby?" Clara whispers as we quietly make our way down the hallway of the bunker. We've continued to live in the underground building until we can get additional information from the main players involved in both David and Jeanine's plans.

I stop walking, suddenly realizing that the people I trust with Greyson will all likely be attending Eric's testimony.

"I'm not leaving him here that's for sure." I reply.

We gather quickly, and after a brief text conversation with Edgar he and Tobias meet us at the SUV that will be taking us back to Chicago. Peter has volunteered to drive us, and Clara sits in front with him, while Edgar and Tobias sit in the middle bench and I strap Grey into his car seat in the far back and take my place next to him.

The car is relatively quiet and Grey falls asleep quickly since he never got his complete nap earlier today. I nervously fidget and Edgar peers over his shoulder and finally turns towards me.

"He's going to be proven innocent." He says quietly. Tobias moves so he's facing Edgar but turns to look at me as well.

"I know, but what happens next? What are my parent's roles in this? I feel like everyone is in on this big secret and tiptoeing around me. What does Eric know? What do you two know?" I ask.

The fleeting glances the couple shares are enough to tell me I've hit close to home with my questions so I continue. "If you think that keeping me in the dark about my families involvement in a genocide is in some way protecting me you are sorely mistaken. I'm not some delicate princess living in her fairy tale castle that needs shielded from the scary outside world. I've been involved in this war just as long as you both have, whether it be directly or not, and I deserve the damn truth for once." I growl.

"I simply wanted your memory issues to be resolved before adding to your plate Tris…" Edgar begins, carefully choosing his words. "You are an important member of this team, I don't want you to think for a second that my hesitance in telling you anything has any reflection on how we view you as our teammate, and as a Dauntless soldier at heart."

"But…?" I prompt.

"No, that's really all, I'm the one who ultimately decided to keep some of these things from you until your memory returned. Where do you want to start?" Edgar asks.

"I don't know what I don't know… does that make sense?" I ask and both he and Tobias nod. "I think I want to start with Eric. What happened with Jeanine that was enough for Zeke to arrest him?"

"When Jeanine was arrested she testified under truth serum that she had been working with Eric for months when he was leading Detroit, and she disclosed plans the two of them were making to remove David from the government." Tobias says.

"But didn't we want David removed?" I ask.

"Yes, but not at the hands of a war criminal Tris." Tobias replies icily and I realize how ignorant my comment was. His tone softens when he speaks again. "Eric had no idea who Jeanine was when he began working with her, and he believed he was protecting her identity only because of the sensitivity of what she was suggesting in her plans to overthrow David. Eric knew, even while suffering from the effects of the memory serum, that David was not the person he pretended to be."

"Eric's a victim in all of this too, Tris. What David and Jeanine have done to the two of you is utterly despicable. David took the coward's way out when he killed himself, but Jeanine is finally here to pay for her sins." Edgar replies in a firm voice. "She WILL pay." He adds. I watch my brother carefully as he averts his eyes and directs his attention to the window.

We sit in silence and I see Peter glancing back at me from time to time through the rearview mirror. He turns and offers me a brief smile before returning his attention to the road. Clara is nodding off next to him, Edgar continues to stare out the window and I find Tobias staring at me.

"My parents…." I say in a whisper.

"There is evidence of long term drugging and a variety of memory serum that matches what we've found in you, Eric, Clara, Roxanne, Matthew and Nita." Tobias replies. "Tris, they're being treated with the anti-serums right now, but we have no idea how long it will take for them to get their memories back."

"We also don't know how they ever got involved with David." Edgar adds.

"But this means they may not be the monsters everyone's made them out to be." I reply.

"We just don't know yet, Tris. It's going to take some time." Edgar sighs. "I can't get my hopes up that one of my parents may actually give a shit about me just to be let down again."

Tobias puts his arm around his husband and I reach out and grasp Edgar's hand. "What aren't the two of you telling me?" I finally ask.

Edgar leans his head on Tobias' shoulder and says nothing. I watch as Tobias whispers in his ear and Edgar nods in affirmation.

"Jeanine admitted under truth serum that her whole reason for conceiving Edgar was in an attempt to create someone genetically pure. When she found out he wasn't pure, she planned on using him for experiments." Tobias says quietly.

"And when she was done with me she planned on disposing of me just like the others." Edgar adds. "So, unless Daddy Dearest turns out to be the father of the year I'm pretty fucked in the parental department."

"You are both so much more than your genetics." Peter finally says while slowing to turn into the parking garage of Candor. "Fuck anyone who tries to tell either of you anything different."

"Language Peter!" Clara scolds from next to him and he shakes his head.

"The kid is asleep." He argues with a smile and Clara chuckles.

"Well, in that case I will second that statement. Fuck them all." Clara adds, causing all of us to break out in quiet laughter.

We walk briskly into the Candor headquarters and I am taken aback at the familiarity of my current surroundings. Greyson babbles from his stroller as Clara purposely pushes him along, quietly focused on her task of seeing her grandson testify once again.

"Feels pretty familiar huh?" Peter asks as he falls in step next to me. I nod my head and he puts a protective arm around me, trying his best to shield me from the prying eyes of the public.

"Why do they seem so angry?" I whisper.

"Jeanine Matthews is a hated woman, and her allegations against Eric have caused a public outrage. He's made it through this before and he will again." Peter replies.

The courtroom is as cold as I remember, both in temperature and overall demeanor and our small group is able to find seats together close to the stage. I watch several people, including Jack Kang, working on the lie detector machinery and I hear bits and pieces of conversations around me as I entertain Greyson on my lap.

"…I can't believe she brought a baby here…"

".. _brought_ the baby, I can't believe she _had_ a baby with that monster…"

"…who knows if it's even his… I heard they separated for almost two years. That baby doesn't look nearly old enough to be his…"

"…maybe that's why she's been in hiding all this time…?"

"She can hear you, and so can their son!" Peter shouts as he jumps up from where he was sitting next to me. There are others who jump up and begin yelling back and forth, causing Greyson to cling to me and whimper. The shouting becomes too much, and soon the guards are stepping in to separate the crowd. I hug Greyson to my chest and make my way out of the courtroom, while shouts and insults follow me until I finally make it to the hallway. I walk quickly towards an empty corridor and through the first unlocked door I can find.

"Oh, Mrs. Coulter, I was just about to come find you. Mr. Kang wants to see you, right this way." The attractive thirty-something woman rises from her desk and directs me towards a partially open door. "He's on his way back to the office, if you just have a seat in here I'm sure he'll be back shortly. Can I get either of you anything?"

I grasp at the diaper bag I have slung over my shoulder and shake my head in the negative. She smiles at me before leaving the room and shutting the heavy door behind her. Grey gets antsy, wiggling and grunting to get free from my lap. I take his two hands and walk him around the office, his sweet babbles bring a smile to my face in spite of the terrible circumstances that led me to this office.

Another door opens and I look up and see Jack Kang walk in with my husband right behind him. Greyson tugs at my hands and babbles "dadadadadadadada" repeatedly as he struggles to reach his father. The surprised look on both Eric's and Jack's faces doesn't go unnoticed, but Eric eagerly reaches for his son and scoops him up in his arms.

"Tris, I didn't realize that Michelle had already sent for you." Jack says as he glances between Eric and me. "Eric had requested to see you. I have a few more things to take care of before this farce of a trial, so the two of you feel free to use my office. I trust you won't be taking off on me Eric." He says with one of his rare smiles which I see Eric return.

"I'll be right here when you get back." Eric replies and Jack nods as he exits his office. We look at each other for several seconds before either of speak.

"Hey." I say softly.

"Hey." He replies. "I didn't want either of you to see me locked up…" His voice trails off and he looks down at the floor.

"I know." I reply.

"We need to talk." He mumbles.

"Yes, I know." I retort.

"Tris, I don't exactly know what I'm guilty of. The year and a half in Detroit is mostly a blank for me. I have no idea what happened." He explains as Grey plays with the identification badge hanging from Eric's neck.

"I know this too."

"And yet you're calmly standing there like nothing has happened." He replies.

"We could sit if you'd prefer." I bite back with a smile and he cocks his head to the side and his lips turn up in that lopsided grin that melts my heart. He sits down on the sofa and gestures for me to sit next to him.

"He's calling me dada now." Eric says almost wistfully as he strokes the soft blonde curls on our son's head. Grey's eyes blink slowly as he snuggles against his father.

"He is. He loves you Eric. We both do. Whatever happens today nothing changes for us, or for our family."

"We have a lot of memories here." He replies softly. We thread our fingers together and he smiles at me before continuing. "I probably shouldn't say too much, I really don't want to skew any of your memories."

"We made our relationship official here. You even ended up asking me to marry you here." I reply. "Eric, I remember almost everything I think."

"I never thought I'd want this – a commitment, kids, marriage – none of it was ever on my radar until you. We've been through so damn much and you're still here. I can't put into words what you both mean to me." Eric says in a muffled voice. I can tell he's struggling with composure.

"Eric we will get through this too. It's almost over now-" I reply before we are interrupted by a sharp knock and watch as Jack strides through the door.

"They're ready for you." He says to Eric who nods in response. "Tris, my assistant Michelle can watch Greyson here in the office if you'd like. The courtroom is controlled, but I would advise against bringing a child into the proceedings regardless of the atmosphere of the room." He says to me evenly.

I look over at Eric. "She's been really good to me since I've been here. I'm comfortable with Grey staying with her. I agree with Jack, he shouldn't be in the courtroom. We still don't know what will happen." Eric replies.

We both say goodbye to Grey, who is currently enthralled with Michelle as she sits on the floor and plays with his toys. Eric and I share the briefest of kisses before Jack leads him down the hallway away from me. I make my way back into the courtroom where my brother rushes to my side to lead me back to where he's saved my seat.

"Where's Peter?" I ask and Edgar grins at me.

"In contempt of court. He let those assholes have it. Jack said we can pick him up on our way out of here today." He replies with a chuckle. "Did you get to see Eric?" he asks in a serious tone.

"Yes, we are good." I reply with a nod.

"Where's Grey?"

"With Jack's assistant. Eric trusts her." I reply and Edgar smiles back at me.

We watch as Eric is brought in, the guards allow him to sit down before loosely connecting his cuffs to the floor. I can tell that Jack is using the barest of restraining techniques, and that mostly the guards and chains are for show.

Jack begins the trial with the same instructions and explanations I've heard entirely too many times before, and instead of focusing on his words I watch my husband. Eric is calm and collected, his grey eyes never leave mine and the smallest hint of a smile curls on his lips. To others, he may look arrogant or cocky, but to me this is the Eric I've always loved. He's confident.

My attention is focused once Jack gets past the baseline questions and starts prodding for information about Eric's memory altering and begins to question him about the time we were kidnapped and kept apart.

"Eric, what is the last memory you have of your home in Chicago?" Jack asks.

"I married the love of my life." He replies with a soft smile. "Afterwards we gathered with a small group of our friends and family and left the city."

"Why did you leave?"

"There was a box that Tris' parents were protecting. Um, Tris is my wife for those who don't know. Her parents, Andrew and Natalie Prior, were protecting a box that contained a message from outside the wall."

The sounds of surprise that filter through the crowd amplify and Jack is forced to issue a stern warning before continuing.

"Why did you believe this mysterious message?"

"We didn't necessarily, however the person in the video identified themselves as a Prior, and both my wife and brother in law deserved answers regarding who this woman was and where they came from. The message was a clear indication that their relatives came from a place that was outside the wall." Eric replies. My eyes dart over to the woman who is monitoring the test and I'm relieved as she nods in affirmation.

"Do you remember what happened once you left the confines of the city?"

"We were picked up by David and his then wife Roxanne and taken to the city of Milwaukee. We were welcomed rather warmly, however it became obvious that there was a somewhat sinister reason that our presence was required there. They were after my wife, and the genes they claim that are pure, and they were after my other brother in law for the same reason." Eric replies.

"Edgar Matthews?" Jack prods and Eric shakes his head.

"No, his husband Four." Eric replies. "Both he and Tris are considered genetically pure."

"I understand at one point you became the focus of David." Jack replies.

"I was, yes. An attempt was made on my life and I survived." Eric answers vaguely, causing Jack to frown.

"Continue." Jack commands and Eric scowls.

"David had me injected with death serum in an attempt to get closer to Four and Tris. I survived it." He shrugs and the crowd gasps.

"How?" Jack prods. It's obvious that Eric doesn't want to talk about his experience and Jack seems to know this.

"I don't know how." Eric growls and the lie detector technician shakes her head.

"Eric, the truth." Jack commands.

"Dammit Jack, I told you I don't want to talk about this!" Eric shouts and the Candor guards surround him. Jack holds both hands up in an effort to keep them from Eric and he shakes his head before turning his attention back to my husband.

"You will answer my questions." He says slowly and with venom, and Eric nods in defeat.

"They said I was also genetically pure, some sort of phenomenon. It took a long time for me to recover, I couldn't remember my own wife, I couldn't talk, I couldn't walk. I had months of medication, therapy, just everything. During my recovery they found out my wife was pregnant and they fucking drugged us and kidnapped us. They sent me to fucking Detroit and made me forget my own fucking wife! They took almost two years away from us! She had our son without me! I then find out that David wanted our boy…"

Eric's face is red with anger and he is pulling against his restraints. Jack's guards push him back down into his chair and Jack approaches him, gently placing both of his hands on Eric's shoulders and leaning in to speak so only Eric can hear him. The crowd is alive with conversation, many realizing for the first time just what lengths David went to in his attempts to destroy our lives. Once the crowd and Eric have calmed down, Jack allows Eric to continue.

"David kept us drugged, by administering memory altering serums in our food and water supplies much like Amity and their peace serum. Because of my divergence, or genetic purity as David called it, I was able to have moments of somewhat clarity and awareness. I knew that David was malicious but I couldn't put everything together because of the severe nature of my memory altering. This is when I met Jeanine again." He sighs.

"Did you remember Jeanine?"

"I did to an extent. I knew her, but I didn't know in what capacity. I didn't fully trust her, but I also believed she was the one person who could help me expose David. You have to understand that I was drugged heavily, and even though I had a rampant mistrust of David during this time I still had no idea who I was or what my life was before being put in Detroit. I didn't remember Tris, I knew nothing of Greyson, I didn't remember any member of my family or my friends. David manipulated my memory, and he went so far as to implant memories – for instance I know that Jeanine had my entire family killed because I didn't follow her orders. You see, I know that now that the memory serum has been expelled from my body but in Detroit I believed I had lost my parents in a freak accident. I didn't even remember I had a brother." He chokes back a sob.

Clara is softly crying next to me and I wrap my arms around her. Eric's eyes never leave mine as he continues his testimony.

"You have to understand that when Jeanine came back into my life I had no one. My assistant Clara was my only friend and confidant, but I even had moments where I believed she could be a plant working for David. I remembered Jeanine in some sort of familiarity, but that was it. Unfortunately it was enough for me to trust her. We developed a plan to overthrow David, but it never came to fruition."

"Why is that?" Jack asks.

"Roxanne brought my wife and son to me." Eric says quietly. "Jeanine disappeared when this happened."

"What do you mean?"

"I tried reaching out to Jeanine once I had my family back – when we first made it to the bunker to meet Edgar. As soon as I explained to Jeanine that I had a wife and son she refused me. I didn't understand why at the time, but as my memories returned I realized who she really was."

"Would you willingly work with Jeanine Matthews?" Jack asks.

"No, absolutely not." Eric replies.

"Do you remember any planning you did with Jeanine to overthrow David?"

"Unfortunately I do not. I have a great deal of memory loss when it comes to my time in Detroit." Eric replies. The technician nods her head.

Jack continues to question Eric and I look around and notice that the crowd seems riveted, hanging on to every word. For the first time since arriving in Candor I feel like they finally believe that Eric is innocent.

"My recommendation is that Eric Coulter is released. The man has been through enough." Jack's stern voice cuts through the room and the affirmation I hear from the crowd eases my nerves. Jack looks over at his guards and nods, and they quickly unchain Eric who leaps off the stage and runs directly to my open arms.

There are many pats on his shoulders and back as the crowd begins to accept Jack's verdict. A sharp whistle causes everyone to stop talking and turn their attention towards the stage.

"We will begin the next trial immediately, which will be a combination of truth serum and this lie detection machinery." Jack announces much to the surprise of everyone in the room. He looks over at his guard before speaking again. "Bring me the next prisoner."

Eric looks down at me and then follows my line of sight to the stage where the next prisoner is being roughly led to the same chair that Eric once occupied.

"Tris." Eric whispers.

The tears burn my eyes as they finally fall, breaking all of my resolve. My only response is to choke out one word.

"Dad."


	43. Chapter 43

**AN: Hello out there! Happy Holiday's to all! My writers block (and extremely busy schedule) haven't changed too much, but I have found some time to re-read my unfinished stories in an attempt to wrap things up. Those of you who have continue to follow me I truly appreciate you! I can't commit to a schedule, but I will continue to write. :)**

Tris POV

 _ **Flashback**_

 _I'm relishing the way the wind feels as it whips through the strands of my long hair. I don't know where my father is taking Caleb and me, but for the first time ever I've been allowed to let my hair down free. I watch as my brother skips through the taller grass as we continue our walk through the outskirts of Abnegation. The sunshine is warm on my exposed arms, another plus from our adventure today is the itchy woolen sweater I usually have to wear is instead in the backpack my father is carrying, along with Caleb's lighter overcoat as well._

" _Caleb, don't get too far ahead." My father admonishes. I wriggle against his hip, wanting down from the confines of his arms so I can run with my brother. "Beatrice, if you get down you have to hold your brother's hand."_

" _I promise I will." I reply._

 _My father sets me down and I reach for Caleb's outstretched hand. The two of us continue skipping along in front of our father, giggling and kicking the occasional rock along the way._

" _My word, they are certainly growing up." I hear a woman's voice and stop immediately, falling to the ground when Caleb yanked unsuspectingly on my arm. I look up and see the pretty blonde woman. "Oh goodness, sweet little Beatrice. Are you ok? Let me help you up." She reaches her hand out for me._

 _I glance back at my father. "Beatrice, you remember Daddy's friend Miss Matthews." He says as he tips his hat to the beautiful blonde woman in front of me. I glance to her side and see the little blonde boy gripping on to her skirt._

" _Andy!" Caleb shouts, drawing a grin from the boy. The two begin to run around, my brother completely forgetting that he pulled me to the ground. I reach for Miss Matthews' outstretched hand and she easily pulls me up. Her blue eyes are sparkling behind her black rimmed glasses and she offers a bright smile and then busies herself with dusting my scraped knees while I glance up at my father._

" _Are you ok?" He asks as he kneels in front of me, examining my legs._

" _I'm ok." I reply. "Thank you Miss Matthews."_

" _Oh Beatrice, you can call me Jeanine. You are such a pretty girl, how old are you now?" She asks._

" _Four years old." I reply proudly._

" _You'll be starting school soon." Jeanine beams._

" _She actually already started. They accepted her early into the gifted program." My father replies with a large smile. His warm hand falls to my shoulder and he gives it a squeeze._

" _Our Beatrice is really something special, isn't she?" Jeanine says while smiling at me. She's such a pretty lady, with her beautiful bright blue eyes, blonde hair and bright red lips. "If you're feeling better darling you should run along and play with your brothers."_

" _Ok!" I exclaim as I scamper away towards the two boys. I can't help but be curious as to what my father and Jeanine are talking about when I notice my father brush her hand away from his._

 _I take a moment to reflect on what Jeanine just said to me… she said brothers as in more than one. This isn't the first time I've heard her refer to Andy as my brother, but it's the first time she's said it so openly. Usually I learn from eavesdropping on the conversations she has with my father, which is something I wouldn't ever be able to admit._

" _Father seems angry." Andy says as he plops down next to me._

" _He's not your father." I reply angrily._

" _Yes he is. Mother told me so!" Andy argues as Caleb sits down across from us, while carefully trying to avoid wrinkling his shirt._

" _Why are you shouting?" Caleb asks._

" _Because Beatrice said that he's not my father again." Andy huffs as his oversized glasses slip down his nose._

" _Well he's not." I argue and Caleb rolls his eyes._

" _She's just a baby." Caleb sighs._

" _I am not a baby!" I shout and both boys erupt in laughter before running away from me again._

 _I feel the sting of tears in my eyes and I will myself against crying. My Abnegation teachings say crying is self-indulgent, and I know father will frown upon any displays in front of Miss Matthews. I glance back at the two of them and notice they seem to be having an argument._

" _Want to play hide and seek?" Andy asks, flopping down next to me again. I scowl at him before looking past him to my father and Jeanine. I see the two embracing and I can feel the heat on my cheeks as a blush forms. Before Andy can follow my line of sight I decide to answer his question._

" _You're it!" I exclaim, running away while ignoring his protests. I sneak over closer to my father and Jeanine and decide to use our game to hide in the bushes beside them. I can faintly hear Andy counting out loud. The bushes are thick with briars that I can feel snagging on my clothes, but I decide this will help keep me covered since no one would think I'd choose to hide in an area where I could easily be hurt._

 _They all think I'm too delicate. I'm brought out of my thoughts by the slight rise of Jeanine's voice. "Why do you fight this?"_

" _I'm a married man Jeanine." My father sighs._

" _Happily?" Jeanine asks breathily._

" _That's unfair." He replies._

" _No Andrew, what's unfair is that you've been trapped in that farce of a marriage…."_

 _My father interrupts her. "You know it's complicated." He sighs in defeat. "I have the children to think of…"_

" _You have three children Andrew!" She hisses. "Why is it that only two of them get to grow up with their father? What makes it fair that Andy only gets these clandestine meetings behind her back? Does she even know about him?"_

" _Of course she knows Jeanine." He replies angrily. "I would never hold that information from my wife. However, I'm trying to wait until Caleb and Beatrice are a bit older to tell them about Andy. This is much more than either of them can truly understand at this age. The fact that you continue to refer to Andy as their brother has already brought up some thoughtful questions from Caleb. I can't imagine trying to explain this to Beatrice too."_

" _You and I both know that Beatrice will understand this Andrew." She says evenly._

" _What's that supposed to mean?"_

" _You know exactly what she is." Jeanine says in the same low tone of voice. "You can continue denying it, or ignoring it, but you know she is what David sent you here to create. What he sent you here to create with me!"_

" _Jeanine…."_

" _Does Natalie know what our plans are Andrew? Does she understand that Beatrice is not her child?" Jeanine hisses._

" _Jeanine, stop this right now. You're a mother, you should know more than anyone that I cannot and will not just rip a child from their mother's arms…"_

" _That girl is not her child and you know this!" Jeanine replies harshly. "Just because Natalie was an incubator of eggs provided by the bureau does not mean she is entitled to those children! Beatrice is property of the bureau, and the sooner you are to stop fighting them the better off you will be!"_

" _Beatrice is my daughter!" My father whispers furiously. I've never once heard that tone come from him._

" _Andrew, darling, please calm down. We know that all three of the children are biologically yours, however you know that all three have different donor eggs. We found early on that my eggs were not what they thought with the embryotic testing of Andy. David harvested both Caleb and Beatrice from other genetically pure donors… Andrew the two of them are technically property of the bureau."_

" _The two of them are children Jeanine. They are people. They are not to be some experiment!"_

" _Andrew, are you saying that you are breaking the contractual agreement you made with the bureau?" Jeanine asks incredulously._

" _What I am saying is I love all of my children and I will not let them become some sort of experiment." My father replies._

" _They already are experiments Andrew. We've seen so many of these – Andy and Caleb are failures but Beatrice…"_

" _Failures! How dare you call these children failures Jeanine? What has gotten into you?" My father replies angrily._

" _You are forgetting where you came from Andrew." She replies._

" _No, I will never forget that place." He hisses._

" _There you are!" Caleb exclaims as he pokes his face through the thick shrubbery. "How'd you even get in there?"_

" _Shhh!" I hiss._

" _You were listening to them!" Caleb yells even louder. "Dad…." He shouts as I yank hard on his arm._

" _Caleb darling, who are you talking to?" Jeanine asks as she approaches. I watch as the realization passes over her face when she sees me peering out of the shrub. "Beatrice, were you eavesdropping?"_

 _My father quickly approaches me and I will myself for the punishment I'm sure he will be giving. While my father is incredibly gentle, his words can sometimes cut worse than a knife._

" _Beatrice, what were you doing in there?" He asks in a gentle voice. I can feel the heat rushing to my cheeks and I swallow thickly._

" _She was hiding." An out of breath Andy says as he pushes his glasses up over his sweaty nose. "I found Caleb first, and he was just trying to avoid being it."_

" _She was listening to them!" Caleb squeaks and Andy furrows his brows at him. I watch as Andy appears to playfully shove Caleb, but the look he passes me lets me know he's on my side._

" _She was hiding. You just didn't want to be it!" Andy exclaims. "Stop picking on her, she's just a baby!"_

 _In a split second realization washes over me… it's always Caleb who calls me a baby and Andy who tries to cheer me up. This is the first time in my young life that I know that Andy truly does care about me. The mischievous glint in his eyes lets me know to continue this distraction technique._

" _I am NOT A BABY!" I shout as I aggressively flee from my hiding spot. "And you can't catch me!" I singsong as I make my way back to the tree we selected as our base. I run again, wind whipping through my hair while holding my dress up to avoid tripping over it. I grab the tree as Andy approaches me, and we both giggle as we look back at the disapproving look on Caleb's face._

" _You helped me." I whisper to him as I catch my breath. He nods his head and pushes his glasses up. "Why?" I press._

" _Because you're my sister." He shrugs._

" _But Caleb…"_

" _Is just as mean as my mother." He whispers back._

" _Your mother is mean to you?" I question but he nods to the quickly approaching adults with Caleb chattering away next to them._

" _Beatrice, we may not see each other for a while, but remember that our father isn't one of them." He says quietly._

" _One of who?" I ask._

" _The monsters." He whispers as the adults finally reach us._

 _ **End Flashback**_

"He's not a monster." I whisper as Eric pulls me tight against his side.

"What did you say?" Eric asks.

"My father. He's not a monster." I repeat.

"Baby, look at me. What happened? What did you remember?" Eric asks as he positions himself directly in my line of sight. I realize I'm not necessarily focusing on him, or on anything else in particular.

"My dad, where is he?" I ask frantically.

"They took him back to his cell. Do you not remember them beginning his testimony?" He asks. I shake my head and he continues. "They did the baseline questions, and then once they started asking him about his involvement with David there was some sort of emergency and Jack was called away. We're in recess right now."

"Edgar?" I ask.

"I'm right here. Tris, what happened?" Edgar asks.

"I remembered, it was a memory from my childhood, a meeting between my father and Jeanine…" I ramble and shake my head. "We were playing hide and seek… I mean my brothers and I were."

Eric looks surprised and interrupts. "You mean Edgar too?"

I nod. "Yes. My dad took Caleb and me to play with Edgar while he spoke with Jeanine. I was four years old, I do remember that, and from what I can remember it wasn't the first time we'd been around Edgar. We actually knew him as Andy, and he knew my father was his father as well." Edgar nods his head as I speak.

"Yeah, we did get together quite a few times when we were kids. It just stopped out of the blue when Jeanine and our father got into a disagreement over her beliefs regarding divergents." Edgar replies.

"You told me he wasn't one of them – and you said he wasn't a monster." I reply.

Eric keeps glancing between the two of us without further comment. Edgar sighs and shrugs his shoulders before speaking again.

"That was a long time ago Tris." He says carefully.

"Do you believe he's part of all of this?" I challenge.

"I think the truth will come out with his testimony today." Edgar remarks in an offhand way. I can tell by the way Tobias shifts next to him that he's uncomfortable with this conversation.

"Is there something more? Why does it feel like you're holding back?" I ask.

"I'm just trying not to get my hopes up." Edgar replies quietly and Tobias slips his arm around his shoulders. The two of them talk quietly for a moment.

I realize something that should have been so obvious before – Edgar has all of his memories and this entire ordeal must have been pure hell on him. He grew up with Jeanine trying to poison him to believe that divergents are all damaged and evil, all while he desperately tried to hide his own divergence from her. He was torn away from his father and siblings, and treated like his bloodline made him a pariah in their society. I reach my hand to his and give it a squeeze. There's so much I wish I could say, but it will need to wait until this last piece of our family puzzle is out on the table for everyone's judgment.

I turn away from my brother to give him and his husband some privacy and see Jack's assistant Michelle making her way towards me. I quickly get up from my seat to meet her. "Is something wrong with Grey?" I ask and both Clara and Eric join me.

"No, he's fine, he's napping currently, but Jack has asked me to come find you. He needs to see you and Edgar in his office." Michelle replies. She must notice my hesitance because she immediately speaks again. "You can all come with me, I know there are no secrets with your family."

I glance over at Clara and meet her eyes briefly before taking my husband's hand and following Michelle down the corridors to Jack's office. Michelle opens the door and ushers us in before quietly stepping out of the office.

"We can all sit at the conference table." Jack says as he moves from his desk to the larger table near the corner of his office. "There is a development I needed to discuss with Edgar and Tris regarding their father, and also regarding Natalie Prior. There is a lot of information to share, which could be impactful to everyone in this room."

We all glance at each other but no one says a word, all waiting for Jack to continue.

"Natalie Prior made a full voluntary confession this morning." Jack says carefully. "She fully implicated herself in the crimes she has been accused of, including a confession of repeatedly dosing her husband and also Beatrice with memory altering serums. She has claimed that Andrew Prior was an unknowing participant in the crimes he has been accused of, and she admitted she was fully aware and cooperative in the crimes against the divergent." He pauses and takes a deep breath.

"Does this mean she will be testifying first?" I ask.

"That will not be possible." Jack replies evenly. "Mrs. Prior's confession was left in the form of a letter. She was found deceased in her cell this morning, she had hanged herself."

"Oh my god." I whisper. Memories flood my mind of my gentle mother, the same woman who would carefully cut my hair and sew my clothes. The one who taught me to put others before myself, who's giving nature was evident in everything she did my entire life. I'm numbly aware of Jack passing a letter across the table to me and I can see through my tears that it is my mother's handwriting. I shake my head as Eric puts his arms around me, and I finally let the tears flow as I press my face against his chest.

"I'll read it." Edgar volunteers from his seat next to me. He clears his throat before beginning.

"To whom it may concern. Please understand I am writing this under no coercion or obligation, except to myself and my family to finally be truthful about my involvement in the crimes I have been accused of. My name is Natalie Marie Gerard Prior, I was born in the city of Milwaukee and sent to live in the city of Chicago on a mission to find a cure for genetic damage. My father Nathaniel Gerard and mother Davina Gerard had begun this mission, and I worked beside my brother David Gerard to continue their vision once they had passed away. I believe whole-heartedly in my family's cause, however the only two living bloodlines of the Gerard family are myself and my niece Juanita, and she chose to follow her mother Roxanne's path. I am alone in my beliefs, just as I am alone each day and night in this cell, and I refuse to let your city kill me.

I was sent to the city of Chicago with a mission, which was to begin a life with Andrew Prior, who my family had already targeted as being one of the least genetically damaged residents of Chicago. I cared deeply for Andrew, however he was in a pre-arranged relationship with another person who was working for my family named Jeanine Matthews. I was instructed to use a prototype mind-controlling serum to persuade Andrew to leave his pregnant girlfriend and to being a romantic relationship with me…" Edgar's voice falters a bit and I glance over at him. I can see the pain etched on his face.

"Edgar, you don't have to read anymore…" I begin and he shakes his head.

"We need to know the truth about all of this Tris." He replies and continues on.

"Andrew and I began a relationship, however instead of conceiving naturally my brother David had been working side by side with a genetic research team in Erudite, specifically Kevin and Elizabeth Coulter to harvest eggs from the closest to genetically pure to be used in an attempt to create someone who had no traces of genetic damage." Edgar pauses again and glances over at Eric.

"Keep going. I already know my parents were working with genetics." He replies in an even tone.

"I had told Andrew that I was unable to conceive naturally and he agreed with these implants. Caleb was born and under the guise of having a checkup I took him to my brother David for genetic testing. It was determined that Caleb was not pure, so we immediately went through another round of implanting to conceive Beatrice. Once she was born and tested we found that she was one hundred percent genetically pure. My delivery of Beatrice caused irreversible trauma to my uterus, and unfortunately I had to undergo a full hysterectomy. I believe more attempts were made to use Andrews's genetics with another carrier but none were successful, Beatrice became the only known genetically pure. This put a target on her since Jeanine had radically separated from the Bureau of Genetic Welfare in Milwaukee and was running her own mission against what she called the Divergent. An entire war was waged by Jeanine Matthews in an effort to have Beatrice.

I kept control of my husband using the mind control serum, and I suppressed and replaced his memories as needed. I also used the same types of serums on Caleb and Beatrice in different stages of their lives. Caleb was taken off serums when he voluntarily joined Jeanine's cause, make no mistake on that. Caleb chose the life he lived and his ultimate demise.

While I do wholeheartedly believe in my family's genetic research, I do have regrets. I am sorry to have hurt people that I genuinely cared for. Andrew, Beatrice and Edgar – I am sincerely sorry for the pain I have caused each of you in various ways. I now know that a lot of my own cooperation was enforced by the same serums that I am guilty of using on each of you. I've spent several days in this cell reflecting on my choices, and wondering how many of them were truly my own.

In closing, please understand that everything my husband did was a direct result of the serums he was given. Any time Andrew was without a serum, he fought the plans that David and I had, just as he fought against Jeanine's wildly opposite plans. My husband has always been a man of honor, and he is far more virtuous and kind than I ever deserved. Edgar I am sorry for taking your father away from you – you were a child that was conceived in love because I do know that Andrew loved your mother before she changed into who you later saw. Beatrice, I am sorry for everything that's happened to you. I do love you, and I wish I could have known you as a person instead of being obsessed with your genetics. You have grown into a beautiful wife and mother, and I will always be proud of who you became in spite of everything you had stacked against you.

In spite of me."

Edgar wipes away tears and looks up at us all. "That's it. She signed her name."

"We had a meeting with Andrew – we needed to give him the news of his wife's passing. He asked to immediately testify under serum and while attached to the lie detection machine. While we normally would never have any type of closed door testimony, given the circumstances of his loss and other items he brought up during this meeting we granted his immediate wish. He passed both tests, which also proves the confession given by Natalie Prior was truthful." Jack adds.

"Other items?" Tobias asks. "Jack, you are never this vague."

Jack looks directly at Clara before continuing. "There was testimony given by Mr. Prior that involved the Coulter lineage. It was detailed enough to both collaborate Mrs. Prior's confession, but it also would bring up topics that could be hurtful to the living members of the Coulter family."

"This should come from me." Clara says abruptly. "I believe that what Mr. Kang is referring to is the fact that Andrew Prior knows that Elizabeth Coulter was my daughter. Not only did I lose my daughter once when she chose to continue to follow Jeanine's terrible genetic manipulation, I ultimately lost her forever when Jeanine had my daughter, son-in-law and grandson murdered. Eric, please understand I never meant to keep this from you, and that when I met you we were both under the influence of David's memory serum." She says softly while looking at my husband.

"I know." Eric replies. "Ever since the serums have stopped I've remembered more and more. I already remember stories my mother told my brother and I about you. I have wanted to talk to you about it, but with everything that's happened it's been impossible. We can and will talk more, but right now I feel like we need to focus on Edgar and Tris."

"I understand." Clara replies.

"Clara, this doesn't mean that I am angry or upset. You were the only type of family I had the entire time we were in Detroit. I'm happy to know that it was more than just an honorary title." Eric replies and Clara smiles and places a gentle hand on his arm, giving it a squeeze before dropping her hands back to her lap.

"This impacts you too." I say to Eric and he shakes his head.

"My main concern is our family, and right now you and Edgar are dealing with a lot." Eric replies before pressing a kiss to my forehead.

Jack nods his head, "I know this is a lot of information to take in, which is why I thought having these conversations in private would be best. Our troops exchanged fire with Jeanine Matthews during an attempt to extract her from her hiding bunker last night, and we have confirmed that she is deceased. We have her body in custody as well. Edgar, Tris our recommendation at this point is to release Andrew Prior. We have scores of medical experts who have proven the long term drugging of your father, we have his sworn testimony and also the proven confession from Natalie Prior. Candor cannot find a reason to prolong his incarceration. With Natalie and Jeanine's deaths, we have come to the end of our investigation, and an end to this extremely painful experience that your family has been subjected to."

"You mean this is over?" Edgar asks.

"The worst of it, yes. Candor is working with Erudite leadership to completely disassemble the Bureau and all that stood with it. Anton and I have found the employees of the Bureau have been subjected to years of memory altering serums, introduced into their water and food supply much like the Amity serves the peace serum in their bread supply. What happened in Milwaukee is an absolute monstrosity, however we have the US Government's full cooperation in bringing the Bureau down and ensuring that Chicago is brought back to the same standards and laws as the rest of the United States. What David told you all was a partial truth about Chicago – we were an experimental city and part of a broadcast, however we are in every aspect a legal entity in this country. We will no longer be any type of experiment or serve as any type of entertainment." Jack replies.

"How are we to ever trust the US Government?" Tobias asks.

"I don't expect any of this to be easy, and as everyone in this room already knows truth and justice are very important to this city, my faction especially. While I understand that none of you are willing to give any type of credence or trust in the US Government, I do ask that you put your trust into me." Jack replies.

"You have mine." Eric replies.

"Thank you Eric." Jack nods. "This city is your home, and you are welcome to live anywhere you'd like. There are no more factions and no more rules or limitations. There is just healing, and moving forward."

"What about leadership? Zeke… Johanna…." I begin.

"All of the existing leaders of the city will continue to work together as a council. Anton Spence and his staff in Erudite, Zeke Pedrad and his staff in Dauntless, Johanna and her council in Amity and once Andrew has completely recovered from his serums we'd recommend he work with the rebuilt Abnegation sector as well, which thus far has been ran by Susan Black. While we no longer have factions, we will continue to respect the leadership we have built in the city." Jack responds.

"Susan Black…. My childhood friend is leading Abnegation. A woman…" I reply while smiling.

"Tris, it is a new beginning." Jack replies with a rare smile of his own.


End file.
